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It was the beginning of summer for our main characters, Killua, Gon, and Leorio. And to celebrate the sunny season, they all agreed to stay at the Zoldykc famlies beach house.
Leorio sipped on his ice tea slowly. And Kurapika sat beside him, his head resting on Leorios shoulder with a book in hand. They were on the deck of the house while Killua and Gon were in the ocean below.
Leorio sighs, breaking the silence.
“They’re good kids.”
Kurapika happily hummed in response, too focused on his book to give a genuine reply.
Below was covered in heaps of sand, which small creatures scuttled in and out of. The crystal clear water of the ocean seemed to shimmer under the warm sunlight. Killua and Gon were splashing each other with ocean water while giggling. Leorio and Kurapika eventually went inside as it started to get darker but the two boys stayed outside.
The sun started to set and the ocean shimmered with the fading light, but Killua and Gon still hadn’t left the water. Their laughter had died down some time ago, replaced by the gentle sound of waves and distant squawking of birds.
Killua laid on the sand, staring up at the sky.
“You ever wonder what it’s all for?” he asked suddenly, voice quiet and puzzled.
“What do you mean?”
Killua sat up on the sand, starting to approach the subject with caution. “I mean… everything. Training. Fighting. Chasing after people who don’t even want to be found. What are we really doing?”
Gon tilted his head. “We’re growing stronger. So we can protect our friends! So we can find people like your brother, like Ging…”
“I hate my brother and you know it. He doesn’t want to be found, Gon. And your dad.. he definitely doesn’t want to be found.” Killua said that last bit with a bit more harshness and anger than what he had intended to have but he stood his ground.
Gon’s expression shifted, his brows furrowing. “You’re wrong. Ging just wants me to find my own path first- That’s part of it!”
Killua’s eyes narrowed. “You always make excuses for him.” He scoffed.
Gon crossed his arms, his tone sharper now. “And you always act like you know what’s best for everyone.”
The tension in the air was thick. The waves, once soothing, seemed to grow louder around them.
“I’m just saying,” Killua muttered, looking away, “maybe we’re wasting our time chasing after people who never cared in the first place.”
“You don’t know that,” Gon said, voice firm. “Just because you were hurt by your family doesn’t mean everyone else’s family is the same.”
Killua’s mouth opened slightly in surprise, and for a moment, neither of them spoke.
“That’s.. that’s not fair,” he said finally, hurt flickering throughout his body. “You know that’s not fair.”
Gon’s expression softened slightly, realizing he may have pushed too far. But Killua was already standing up while brushing sand off of himself, his back turned.
“I’m going inside,” he said over his shoulder.
Gon stayed in the water, arms hanging by his sides. The sun had finally set, and the sky was slipping into a deep navy blue. The warmth of the day had vanished, replaced by a quiet chill. both in the air and between them.
The house was quiet.
Kurapika had retreated to a guest room, his book forgotten on the nightstand. Leorio had dozed off on the couch with the TV still buzzing softly in the background. A soft sea breeze filtered through the open windows, carrying with it the salty smell of the ocean.
Killua sat alone on the back steps of the beach house, knees into his chest. His damp hair clung to his forehead, and he hadn’t bothered changing out of his swim trunks. His fingers absentmindedly picked at a loose thread in the towel wrapped around his waist
He hated how quiet everything was now. He hated how guilty he felt. He hated that he’d said it out loud.. that thing he always thought but never dared to voice.
Because deep down, he wanted to believe in the things Gon believed in.
But he didn’t. Not really.
The screen door creaked open behind him, and he stiffened.
“Killua,” Gon said softly.
He didn’t turn around. “Go back inside.”
“I… I didn’t mean what I said earlier,” Gon murmured, stepping down onto the porch behind him. “About your family. I was mad.”
Killua let out a bitter laugh. “No, you did mean it. And you’re right. I act like I know everything because if I don’t… if I let myself feel any of this.. then I’ll fall apart.”
Gon sat beside him, carefully leaving space between them.
“I didn’t come out here to win an argument,” Gon said. “I came because I didn’t want to go to sleep without fixing this.”
Killua’s voice cracked. “Why do you even want to fix it? I ruin everything. Every time. I push people away. I… I said something wrong and you still came after me like I’m worth it.”
“Because you are worth it,” Gon said, louder than he intended. His hands balled into fists at his sides. “You’re my favorite person, Killua. You think I don’t see how hard you try? Even when you’re scared out of your mind, you still show up for the people you care about.”
Killua turned to look at him now, his eyes wet. “I don’t know how to be like you.”
Killua turned his head, his hands working on getting rid of the tears pouring out of him. He hated people seeing him like this. Especially Gon. It made him feel weak.. vulnerable. And he hated those feelings.
“I don’t want you to be like me,” Gon said, his voice reassuring. “I want you to be you. Even when you say things that hurt. Even when you’re angry. I still want you here.”
Killua looked away again, blinking hard. “You’re so damn forgiving. It makes me feel worse.”
Gon reached over, hesitating for just a second before placing a hand gently on Killua’s shoulder.
“You don’t have to earn my forgiveness,” he said. “It’s yours. Always.”
There was a long silence between them, filled only by the sound of waves crashing in the distance. And then, slowly, Killua leaned into Gon, resting his head against his friend’s shoulder.
It wasn’t much, but it was something.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I just… I didn’t know how else to say I was scared.”
Gon nodded, resting his head against Killua’s in turn. “Me too.”
Gon turned his head to face Killua’s forehead and gave it a gentle kiss.
They sat there until the moon had went high into the sky. And in the quiet, there was a painful kind of love only a duo stronger than anything could understand.