Archive of Our Own

You actually gasped when you stepped off the escalator. Taylor Swift’s “Anti-Hero” played on the overhead speakers for the second time in fifteen minutes, but that wasn’t why you were gaping.

Beau stopped short behind you as well. He blinked a few quick blinks, then his eyes widened at the sheer enormity of the inventory.

“Aw, ssshit,” fell from his lips before he could reign it in, earning him a sour look from a young mother and her two-year-old passing by with a huge, Home Depot-sized cart.

This Super Target truly was, well, super. It boasted a section for children that spanned an entire wing of the store, including several rows upon rows of baby bassinets. Beau’s hand came to rest at the small of your back. You rubbed your seven-month pregnant belly, already feeling a cramp coming on from the stormtrooper’s little tap dance inside.

“That it. I’m not gonna make it. Just roll me back to the checkout counter, or better yet, save yourself,” you dryly quipped.

Beau shot you an amused look. “Now, don’t think you’re getting out of this that easily. Where’s the kid gonna sleep? On the floor?”

“We’ll just create a nice nest of blankets for him, like a baby bird,” you joked. “Besides, knowing your son, he’s just going to break it with his baby Hulk-like strength. Unless we find a crib made out of titanium.”

Beau scoffed at you incredulously. “Are you ever gonna let me live that down?”

“You broke our bed, babe. Be proud of your accomplishments,” you said with a smirk.

The man pouted, but by the smirk threatening to break through, you both knew he was all too proud of that particular crime of passion. You snickered and leaned into his side. He couldn’t help but chuckle too, pressing a kiss to the side of your head.

You and Beau ventured into the first aisle of baby beds cautiously. You pushed the cart for stability, even with Beau’s supportive hand. Your pale gold wedding bands flashed under the bright overhead lights, a match to the thicker band on your husband’s left hand while he tested the heft and solidity of the Baby Trend Lil’ Sleeper Deluxe. It looked entirely different from the Shooting Star Rocking Bassinet (with airflow mesh).

What the hell happened to plain solid wood and a nice soft cushion inside? he thought. Come to think of it, Emily’s bassinet had come inherited from one of Carla’s aunts. Now, his little girl was off to college. Beau would’ve been an empty nester, if you hadn’t graced him with a “round two” into fatherhood. Truth be told, he was a little daunted, but mostly excited to start this adventure with you.

“I don’t think I like gray,” you said, contemplating the Sleeper Deluxe.

“If it’s just the color you’re hung up on, then this should be easy,” Beau mused.

“Oh, a bedside sleeper! I’ve heard of this,” you said, quickly moving over to the white on the other side of the aisle. You glanced at the price—Jesus Christ—but your gaze scrolled down to the product description.

The Suteck Baby Bassinet offers a safe, cozy, and versatile sleeping solution for your newborn. With a sturdy steel-alloy frame, soft microfiber fabric, and a spacious high-density foam mattress, it provides comfort and support for infants up to 33 lbs. The 3-in-1 design allows it to function as a side-down bed, bedside sleeper, or stand-alone crib, with seven adjustable heights and an anti-reflux angle for added convenience…

Dear Lord, this thing went on for a whole other page. 3-in-1? Did that make it better than the other “1-in-1” models?

Then you saw another one that said 4-in-1. How many parts were there to a baby bed?

“I’m getting a headache,” you muttered.

“We’re only on the first aisle, sweetheart,” Beau pointed out, rather unhelpfully.

You heaved a sigh. “Okay, hold on.”

You fished out your cell phone from your purse and caved, calling the one person you said you wouldn’t need to call. The line rang only twice before it picked up.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Mom. What kind of bassinet did you say to get again?”

“Ha! I told you so. Ain’t that easy, is it?”

You rolled your eyes and sent a long-suffering look to your husband. He just grinned and stroked your back, waiting for your mom to give you the answer. He didn’t mind. It would probably save you two a whole afternoon wandering through this damn Target.

“Ooh, hey, look at those!” he said, pointing over in excitement at some shiny, colorful toys.

You paused in your conversation with your mother and looked over. You smiled and shook your head. Your big man child was at it again.

“Oh, God,” you laughed. “Babe, you know it’s going to be at least seven to eight years before our son’s ready for a mini dirt bike.”

“Aw, come on,” Beau said. He grabbed the handlebars and pretended to rev the engine, making exaggerated vroom vroom sounds and everything.

“See, it’s even green. Goes along with your whole color wheel,” he added, swiping his hand in a wax off, Karate Kid motion.

You snorted. “Okay, we’ll pin that discussion for a later date. Let’s just focus on where he’s going to sleep, first.”

Beau conceded your point with a shrug and sigh. He rejoined your side and helped you push the cart down the aisle, but he still eyed the mini dirt bike over his shoulder.

I’ll be back for you, he thought. Don’t you worry.