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Chapter Text

Operation: Get Fernando a boyfriend

Ollie created the group chat 

Ollie added Kimi, Gabriel, Franco, Isack

Franco

XD

Isack

We really doing this?

Gabriel 

Yes

Kimi

He looked lonely 

Ollie

And sad

Isack

I guess that's true 

Gabriel

The thing is 

Who should we pair him with?

Franco

First step: Find even more about Fernando's romantic life 

Gabriel 

Let's do that then, try to get as much info as possible 

Kimi stares at George across the table, they were having lunch at the hospitality when Ollie created the group.

"What?" George asks confused "Do I have anything in my face?" He asks grabbing a napkin 

Kimi shakes his head "I was just thinking about something"

"About what?" George questions, about you being such a gossip Kimi thinks but stays quiet "Earth to Kimi, what are you thinking?"

He hesitates but fuck it "You know about me and Ollie right?" He questions but of course George knows they weren't really discreet after Kimi's fp1 crash in imola last year "I was just thinking we can't be the first ones"

"Of course no" George agrees with a small chuckle "That must be between Fernando and Kimi or some guy in the fifties married and with two kids who just happened to have a very close boy-friend" He jokes but what gets stuck in Kimi's head is his namesaker.

"Mhm" He just nods George though seems to have quite an interest in the topic.

"At least they are the only ones that didn't got into a fake marriage or anything. Well actually I don't think Jenson's marriage is fake so I guess he was the first one. Unless you aren't counting bisexuals because in that case it's definitely Fernando"

George's voice has been turning louder and louder which is word but luckily the only one present to hear him is Valtteri. Unluckily the reserve driver seems pissed at what he heard.

"Don't talk about things that don't concern you, Russell" Valtteri angrily says, his accent stronger because of the anger "And you, Kimi, if you are interested ask Fernando or Lewis, hell even Seb but don't go to this gossip" Kimi nods and gets up to leave ashamed, he can still hear the other two talking when he leaves "You can talk about those things like they don't hit a hard spot for some people" He hears Valtteri say "While you all were raised on a progressive world some of the drivers you talk about didn't had that luck"

The words resonate on Kimi's head as he walks to his driver's room. He sits down and thinks for a couple seconds before grabbing his phone.

Operation: Get Fernando a boyfriend 

Kimi

I don't think we should be doing this 

Gabriel 

What!???

Kimi 

I got my eyes open and I don't think we should intrude 

Isack

Kimi what do you know?

Kimi

Not much

It's just 

Valtteri implied that this whole topic affects many drivers

Maybe we should let them be

What if we hurt someone?

Gabriel 

Se não arde, não cura

Ollie

????

Gabriel

It's a saying 

Wounds burn and ache when you put medicine on it but it means they heal

Kimi

What are you implying?

Gabriel 

Maybe they need to hurt a bit to get better 

The world has changed 

What if it's just a sensible topic because they haven't accepted it?

Nando seemed okay with our conversation 

Relieved even

Kimi

I

Maybe you are right

Franco

So the plan still stands

Kimi

In that case I think you need to know that Kimi (Raikkonen not me) is also gay

Well I'm also gay but you get it 

Gabriel 

KKKKKK

That's good to know 

Isack

So Fernando fucked half the paddock but not the other gay?

Franco

Weird 

Ollie

Step two: Finding about Kimi and Fernando's relationship 

Listen Fernando got all weird when we mention him

So there has to be something 

Franco

Agreed 

Isack

We need more info

Gabriel 

On it

Gabriel sneaks into the Aston Martin garage by talking with Felipe until he finds himself inside, once there he walks up to Fernando's driver room.

He knocks and waits for the come in to do so, Fernando is sitting on the table a dozen of data sheets in front of him. He looks only mildly surprised to see Gabriel, he points at the couch and gets up to join him.

"What's wrong?" He asks "You never come here anymore?"

"I may be overthinking" Gabriel half lies "The other day you talked to us and said we could ask questions" Fernando nods in agreement, Gabriel hesitates just a second "If so many drivers are gay why is no one out? I mean I get it wouldn't be good while you are racing because half of the countries half laws against it but once you retire, why?" 

Fernando let's out a deep breath "Ay, Gabri" He sighs arm coming around the younger's shoulders "Listen I can't talk for other people but I can give you my point of view" He says Gabriel nods "Some of us, well most of us actually we grew up in a world where it wasn't okay to be like this. And even as things changed…you don't know it but when you were born and things started to get better, legal. We were still looked upon, treated different on a whole different level to how it is now. And like it or not that stays with you, deep down. And even when you accept it's okay to be who you are there is a part of you telling you but don't be loud." Fernando explains, Gabi hugs him tightly, even though he had come in the hope of getting information that had changed. That changed because Gabriel had never asked anyone things like this, because when he told his own father he had just told him that it was okay but not to make it public of he wanted to get to f1 "I've thought about it" Fernando admits "Coming out once I retire" He clarifies "I even talked with Seb and Mark about it" He adds "They both said the same, once you are out of the sport, once you are free and stop getting so many attention you will want to protect your peace more than anything"

Gabriel nods thoughtfully "I guess it makes sense" He admits

"I don't think I'll ever find peace in retirement" Fernando then says "If I don't I'll come out" He assures "Make it easier for you all and the ones behind"

Gabriel hugs him again "You are making it easier for us already" He assures

"That's what I hoped" Fernando admits "I never had someone to talk about this when I was your age"

"Not Mark?" Gabriel asks confused, Fernando did said

"Mark was my friend, and he probably understood. But I never talked about this things back then, not until years later" Fernando confesses "I talked with Kimi once but…well it didn't go well" The pain in his voice is clear and Gabriel feels afraid of asking 

"Was he homophobic or something?" He asks unsure 

"Not at all" Fernando shakes his head "Kimi is as gay as it gets, we just…it was…doesn't matter, the thing is you can all talk with me"

"Okay" Gabriel says and hesitates a single second before hugging the man again "Thanks, paizão" The nickname leaves his mouth before he thinks about it, he is sure his pai wouldn't mind but he isn't sure if Fernando will.

"Anytime, fillo" Fernando assures with a smile "But come on now we have fp2 in like ten minutes" He says getting up, Gabriel follows him because of course Fernando has to lead the way for him.

Chapter Text

Gabriel sits in the floor next to Isack, they are all in his hotel room.

"I'm not so sure about this anymore" Gabriel admits "After what Kimi said I went to Nando and…something must have happened between him and Kimi" He tells the others, it has been two day since he talked with the Spaniard but for some reason he hesitate about telling the others.

"We don't have to go with any intentions though" Ollie tells him stealing a Gatorade from the mini fridge "We can just go spend time with him"

"I think he would appreciate that more than the loneliness" Kimi easily agrees with him.

"Okay, but be nice" Gabriel warns and he catches himself sounding almost protective.

"As always" Franco mumbles being the first one to get up and leave the room, they all follow him.

They knock at the Aston Martin's door a couple times and it quickly gets open, Fernando smiles at them moving out of the way.

"Came to talk or to drink?" Fernando questions as the rookies take over his bed

"You told us something about a game" Franco says, Fernando nods and walks to the mini bar "Mate you are going to go broke if we keep drinking those"

"Franco we are F1 drivers" Fernando reminds him "I don't even get notified if I buy the whole mini bar because it is so little"

"Vale vale" The Argentinian says shrugging "Fucking old men with their big salaries" Fernando playfully hits his nose after setting the drinks in front of them and the walls to his suitcase.

He grabs a deck and walks back to the bed "We used to play this back in the day" He tells the rookies as he sits down "I came with it actually" He adds "It's like truth or dare only that you can't choose" He says and turns a card as an example "Reds are dares, blacks are truths, the higher the card value the harder it is. So imagine you get a king your dare can be something like calling your ex and telling them you miss them. But if you get a two then the dare has to be soft, something like ding dong ditch or whatever you call it" He explains it's an easy game, so the kids nod "If you get an ace you are free and you can distribute four shots amongst the other players"

"And that's all we drink?" Isack asks frowning, doesn't sound like the other man.

"Oh no, you drink a sip before each round. If you want you can grab a mixer for those" Fernando tells them, they nod and a couple do actually get up to get a soda.

"I'll start" Franco announces, Fernando turns a card for him, five of hearts.

"Like the first ten stories you get" Gabriel tells him as Franco takes a sip of his drink "With your private" The Argentinian shrugs, could be worse.

"I'll go next" Isack offers, Fernando turns a card for him, ten of spikes

"Ou" Franco says chuckling "Pretty big one"

"Have you ever make out with a boy?" Ollie asks

"You had thought about that one, eh?" Gabriel chuckes "Answer, Isack"

"Yes" The Frenchman says turning red "Not my thing tho" He adds "I can see why you'll like it but nope"

"Thank God" Fernando mumbles "Pepe se merece uno mejor" Franco laughs at the whispered comment but doesn't say anything.

They keep playing for a long while, Fernando finds the first ace and sends two shots to Gabriel for being annoying, one to Franco for shameless and the other to Ollie for being the lest drunk. Kimi founds the next one and send one to his boyfriend, two to Fernando because he is old and that's enough and another to Isack because it's unfair otherwise. 

Gabriel finds the third one, they must have around fifteen cards left, he is annoyingly drunk already. 

"You take them, Nando" He says giving the bottles to his mentor "Prove that experience means something" He mumbles struggling with his own words, fucking English.

Fernando sighs but drowns the first bottle, the alcohol it's starting to get to him but he can handle more so he draws the other three shots.

The thing is they hit him before his next round although he is not nearly the worst one, Ollie has fallen asleep against Kimi and Franco seems to have forgotten how to speak English. Isack on the other hand is leaning against Gabriel who is just smiling like an idiot, as if everything were super funny.

Fernando turns his card, king of hearts, Gabriel laughs, fine maybe just a little bit funny.

"Big dare" Kimi says smiling foolishly 

"I say call your crush" Isack mumbles, he probably doesn't have bad intentions but Gabriel pushes him away, betrayed.

Fernando shrugs and grabs his phone, Gabriel let's out air he didn't knew he was holding seeing the older man unbother.

"Hei" The voice coming out of the phone sounds somehow familiar to Gabriel but his drunk brain can't process why "Fer?"

"Kimi" Fernando mumbles, he sounds almost surprised as if he wasn't expecting the other to pick up.

"All okay?" The former driver asks confused 

"Yeah" Fernando instantly answers "Just a stupid dare"

The Finish says something under his breath, a curse probably based on his tone "You sure you are okay?"

"Yes" Fernando insists, Gabriel never expected the Finn to be caring, specially not after what Fernando told him.

"Are you with anyone?" Kimi then asks, he sounds tired.

"The kids" Fernando replies as if Kimi knew them

"Hi" Gabriel mumbles, Kimi curses again

"Fer turn of the speaker and go somewhere we can't talk" Kimi requests "Just a couple minutes" Fernando hesitates a single second before turning of the speaker and walking outside the room.

Gabriel curses Isack and his stupid idea, makes him promise to apologise but Fernando takes so long to come back that they all have fallen on a drink sleep by then.

The older driver just grabs Gabriel room key from his jacket and guesses it's okay if they exchange rooms for the night, although he always picks the same room at hotels. He can make an exception for his kid.

Chapter Text

Gabriel walks through the shopping centre with his head down, he is lucky most people still don't recognise him as an F1 driver but he doesn't want to risk it.

He could have order online, of course, he could also have asked someone to buy it for him but it's not the same.

It has to be him so it means something, he walks into a chocolate shop and buys a box of Fernando's favourites, he then moves to the sports shop next door and buys the new shirt of Real Madrid, the one Fernando mentioned was sold out in the shop he went to. He moves to the jewellery shop next buying the same watch Fernando mentioned having when he was Gabriel's age but lost years ago. It's not nearly as expensive but Gabriel wants him to know that he listened so it will be perfect. 

With the gifts secured on the car he grabs his phone «I happened to be in Monaco, you home?» 

He hasn't really talked with Fernando since the night they got drunk but the older driver had promised everything was fine between them.

«Eeh, yes, come» Fernando texts back a couple minutes later, Gabriel turns on the car and drives to the Aston Martin driver appartment.

There is a Ferrari Gabriel has never seen parked on front but he ignores it walking up to the door with the giftbags on his hands.

He doesn't even has to ring as Fernando has probably heard the car and it's already opening the door.

"Hi, Gabi" The Spaniard greets, Gabriel expected him to be angry or something but he looks happy, happier even "Come in, I'll make coffee"

Gabriel nods following him inside "Got you some things" He mumbles setting the bags at the table.

Fernando smiles shaking his head "You don't need to get me apologize gifts, Gabri, I do want to talk about that but I'm not angry at all" The older assures opening the football shirt bag "Oh you found it, okay this is nice" He accepts pinching Gabriel's cheek as he opens the chocolates setting them in the middle to make it clear he should grab some too. And lastly he opens the watch, he stares at it and then at Gabriel "Oh, kiddo, you really care about me, don't you?" Gabriel nods without hesitation "You listen" He says with a soft smile, Gabriel hugs him.

And then Fernando does something the Brazilian would never expect, he slides the watch on Gabriel's wrist "My sister found mine at home like two weeks ago, I never thought you listened so I didn't mention" He admits "You should keep this one, si? It would meant a lot for me" Gabriel nods and hugs the older again, it feels almost as if Fernando wanted a symbol that Gabriel would come after him, like a legacy.

"Means a lot" Gabriel assures and carefully reaches for a chocolate Fernando smiles doing the same before turning to pour their coffees.

"Living room?" The older questions, Gabriel nods "Bring the chocolates"

Gabriel laughs and does as told, Fernando's apartment it's cozy despite being relatively new. There are quite a few pictures in the shelves, also helmets and even a couple trophies but there is something in the way there are displayed that makes it familiar.

Fernando chuckles "I'll add yours when you give me one" He tells the Brazilian before getting up and approaches the shelves "That's Mark's, that's Kimi's and that's Jenson's" He says pointing at each helmet "Sometimes I change them" He adds, Gabriel nods, Fernando comes to sit back next to him "We have to talk"

"I agree" Gabriel says "I'm really sorry"

"Not that" Fernando says "You have nothing to be sorry about, okay? I showed you the game, I accepted the dare it was not like you forced me and I'm not angry"

"But we thought about it" Gabriel confesses "About trying to get you a boyfriend but…after we talk I regretted it and told them to leave you but Isack slipped out of something"

Fernando looks hurt for about a single second "You are a good kid, Gabri, you had good intentions and you listened to me enough to realise it would probably not work" He calmly says "You did no wrong" He assures Gabriel "Plus it kinda worked"

Gabriel's eyes shut open "What!?" He practically screams

"I've liked Kimi since like forever" Fernando admits "But I thought it would never work until that night"

"You like Kimi?" He dumbly asks, as if they didn't came with that theory weeks ago

"I do" Fernando assures "We went on a date a couple days ago, talk some shit out"

"You said you talked with him once and that it didn't went well" Gabriel says unsure, Fernando looks at him with sad eyes and sighs.

"I…look what I'm going to tell you it's not something I easily say" Fernando carefully starts "I've kept it to myself for a lot of years. When I was sixteen or so I started hanging out with this guy, he was twenty five I think. He…he…joder ¿por qué es tan difícil decirlo?"

"He was a bad?" Gabriel asks, he sounds almost childish, Fernando nods sadly.

"He was a pedophile, Gabri, he only wanted me because I looked young, younger than I was even though I was practically a kid. I didn't knew that, I thought he loved me, that he was a safe person. Someone I could trust which such a vulnerable part of myself. That's why I like that you guys talk and ask and don't think sex and being queer is something that should be kept quiet. Because if someone had spoken with me like that maybe I would have realised things where wrong" Fernando is crying but his voice doesn't get shaky, it's almost like he feels relieved, Gabriel hugs him tightly "When I meet Mark I realised what I lived a couple years ago wasn't right, he opened my eyes. But I couldn't talk with him about that because I felt like he would find me disgusting or something, of course he doesn't and he knows now but…yeah. And then Kimi, it was 2001 I think, we got drunk in a club somewhere and I liked him already you know? And when I saw him kiss a man well I realise I had a chance, we made out that night. And then we went on a couple dates and I decided to tell him but…I wasn't ready Gabriel, I hadn't healed because ignoring a wound doesn't make it go away. The thing is Kimi knew, he knew when we when on dates and he knew that night. And that's the reason he left because he saw that he was hurting me and that he couldn't heal me." Fernando says the memory sounds painful but he seems to have accepted it, on a rational way "I have healed now, he knows. I didn't though I could heal, fillo, not until you guys came around. And you make me open up and I realise that things have changed, that I have changed"

Gabriel is now crying too, he is holding onto Fernando as if his life depended on it. The Spaniard seems so comfortable with that Gabriel doesn't want to move a single inch.

And that's how Kimi finds them, Gabriel reluctantly pulls away as he sees him, Fernando chuckles.

"Told you I would text you" Fernando says the Finn shrugs "You saw the car outside" He adds a smile slowly building on his face, Kimi's lips curl ever so slightly "You wanted to meet him!" Fernando declares Kimi shakes his head properly smiling now "Oh yes you did" He says pulling Gabriel to stand up in front of him "Kimi this is Gabriel, Gabri this is Kimi" Gabriel chuckles at the unnecessary introduction, Kimi smiles ever so slightly "Gabi even though it may seem like it, he is not mute, okay?"

Gabriel chuckles at that, Kimi pokes Fernando's rib on a gesture that seems so fond to Gabriel.

"Nice to meet you, kid, Fer talked about you a lot" Kimi finally says, Gabriel smiles.

"Well he also talks about you" He replies shrugging 

"Hey not teaming up against me now" Fernando earns, the former driver laughs and so does Gabriel "Well fuck you two then"

"Love you too, Nando" Gabriel replies without missing a bit

"Yeah, love you too, Fer" Kimi says giving him a short kiss "Now send the kid to preschool or something" 

"You heard him" Fernando tells Gabriel who just smiles walking to the door.

"Be happy" He tells Fernando "You deserve it"

"Thanks" Fernando easily replies 

"And remember you are an old man now and you have to be sat in a car this weekend" He adds with a smirk Fernando just gives him the middle finger, oh how he loves that kid.