Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Knock knock.

Shuffling was heard behind the door, the knob turning as he opened it. “What do you want—“

There Pomni stood, staring up at purple rabbit with killed innocence and regret. It made Jax want to gag. Before the jester could open her mouth, he slammed the door in her face.

His eye twitched, echoes of her voice getting buried by a ringing that filled his head. Oh how he missed her sweet voice, the one that spoke oh-so-cringy sentences but a voice he loved nonetheless.

Stop being weak.

The doorknob began to rattle, and Jax finally came back to consciousness. He rolled his eyes, turning his back to the door.

POW!

Pomni punted the door down, panting, pointing at Jax as she took careful steps toward him. “Why won’t you talk to me?” She glared.

Jax scoffed in mockery. “Why do you want to know? Go back to the ragdoll, will ya?”

Pomni clenched her fists. “You—“ Ugh. She took a deep breath in. “I’m sorry, okay?”

The rabbit’s eyes narrowed. “Oh really?” He grabbed the inside of his cheek with his teeth. “Prove it.”

“No. I want you to.. To open up.” She stated.

Jax set his hands on his hips, leaning down. “Like I said, there’s nothing more to me. Stop. Looking.” But she wouldn’t. And to hell, he knew she wouldn’t.

“Stop lying!” She spat. “I know you were having fun when on that adventure and I’m tired of you d-deflecting!”

“Oh here we go. Again! You think I REALLY cared about you? I was just having fun shooting ribbons!”

“—Are you sure about that because unless I’m ‘misremembering’ I was the one who shot Gangle anyway!” Pomni swung her fist back, her voice cracking as she held back tears.

Jax huffed, pulling the nearest pillow off his bed and shoving it in his face. “Just shut up!” He yelled through the fabric.

Silence.

The room was dim, the hall too. Pomni stood on top of the door she had kicked down. A frog plush sat in the corner of the room, next to a few CDs. The purple canopy that hung over the bed swayed softly. And then, something hit the door.

Not one, but two tears fell.

Then three, then four. And it kept going. Jax peered from over the pillow, his eyes widening as he saw the jester’s head hanging low, tears falling from her eyes. He dropped the pillow onto the floor, causing a quiet thud as he took a step closer. Gently taking her gloves into his, he whispered—

“Please don’t cry.”

Chapter Text

“Please don’t cry.”

The whole room seemed to freeze. Pomni looked at their intertwined hands, and then up at Jax. Jax, whose eyes were glistening with tears, just like hers.

He let go with one hand, using it to wipe away his tears as he turned away. Pathetic.

Pomni did so as well, wiping her cheeks that were wet with tears. “I’m sorry.” She whispered.

Jax’s silence was ephemeral, and before he could respond, they were suddenly snapped into the main room. He immediately flinched away from her hands, crossing his arms and facing away.

A pair of dentures popped up in the middle of the air, swinging it’s cane around, pointing it to… “the viewers” or whatever that was. “Good morning, my slimy little antlers!” What? “Today we will be having another in-house adventure!” Groans and sighs sounded in alarm, mostly from Zooble, who had fallen out of the flower pot once again.

“And what is it this time, Mr. Artificial Unintelligence?” Caine gave Jax a glance, of annoyance, ignoring him.

“Anyway!.. Today’s adventure is a puzzle game. You will have five minutes each round to move—“

The puzzle piece themselves, Zooble, rolled their eyes. “Yeah, no.” They began to walk off. Caine flew over, bound to chase them, but all in all stayed back.

“Fine. No adventures! Whatever, I don’t care.”

“Finally.” Zooble spat back.

Jax rested his hands behind his head, before his arm was suddenly yanked by a smaller figure. Pomni. Pomni grabbed his hand and dragged him to one of the rooms.

The door had a golden plate on it with a picture of a frog that was crossed out. Jax couldn’t protest in time, because when he spread his teeth out to speak, Pomni had already locked him in the room with her.

Jax scurried into the corner of the room, gazing at the all too familiar scribbled walls, the digital gifts and roses in the corner as memorial; green and purple to match their colors. He had avoided this room for so long, but he remembered all of it.

Ribbit was gone, and it was all his fault.

The jester raised an eyebrow, but shook the thoughts away, clapping her hands together, catching the rabbit’s attention. “Why are you so difficult?” She finally said.

Jax’s ear twitched. “Pfft, me? Difficult? Please, the only difficult one is Gangle.”

Pomni perked up in curiosity. “So you admit I’m not difficult?” Jax gritted his teeth.

“You are.” He lied.

“Bull—[BLOINK!].”

He rolled his eyes. “Whatever, pink cheeks.” She puffed her cheeks out in response, mostly out of frustration. “Why’d you drag me in here? I could be relaxing right now.”

He pushed his arm out, spreading his fingers, pretending to look at his glove when he was really just trying to ignore the conversation. “Because you won’t talk to me.” Pomni growled. “What’s up with you? Was it the corn—“

“No, no. Stop.” Jax’s ears shook at the mention of corn.

She wrapped her hand around his, causing him to flinch once again. But he didn’t mind, if anything, he enjoyed her touch, the feeling of someone’s love was a warm feeling against his hatred, surprisingly. Albeit his current comfort, he pressed a palm against Pomni’s head and pushed her away.

She frowned. “What’s wrong with you?”

“Nothing’s wrong with me.” He grinned. “I just don’t want to catch any… cooties.” Jax leaned in, that dumbass smirk spread across his face. 

That fake smirk. She shook her head. “You really can’t take anything seriously…” Pomni whispered under her breath. “I know you’re hiding something.”

Jax stared at the memorial in the corner. “Huh-? Oh, nah.” Pomni eyed the memorial, then looked back at the bunny.

Then she remembered. The weird reaction she had when Ragatha brought up something about him “not having any real friends anymore,” the frog plush on the corner of his bed, running into this very room with a frog on the door plate. And lastly, his constant staring at the memorial, like he recognized it. Like it meant something to him.

“Who’s that frog?” She asked, demanding an answer.

His smile faltered for a moment, but he brushed her off. “Pfft, I don’t know.”

Pomni rolled her eyes, for what felt like the millionth time today. “Yes you do. Tell me.” He frowned, letting go of her gloves, taking an angry step forward.

“No. I. Don’t.”

“Yes you do!” She fired back.

“Give up on me already.” He said, defeated. “I’m not worth your time.”

“I can’t!”

Without another second to waste, he clenched his fists, articulating a sentence without any thought behind it. “This is for your own good, Ribbit!”

They both took a pause, but Jax didn’t let Pomni respond. He twisted the knob around.

Pomni stood there. Helpless, just as every attempt before. She reached out a hand, but Jax had already turned away.

“You’ve got a lot of nerve to dredge up all my fears.”

Chapter Text

11:00

“You’ve got a lot of nerve to dredge up all my fears.”

Jax opened the door, stepping out of the room, shakily shutting the door behind him. He took a deep breath out, walking across to his own room.

There, he took small strides to his frog plush, gently holding it in his arms, tears threatening to fall. But he refused, taking his gloves off and crawling under his sheets. 

Jax tossed and turned, attempting to fall asleep, but eventually planted on his back, groaning as he pressed his palms against his forehead. He swung his legs over the bed and stood up, his ears falling over his eyes. Jax brushed his fingers against the soft fabric of the stuffed animal, setting it down behind him and making his way to the hallway.

The rabbit stuffed his paws in the pockets of his overalls, which he had forgotten to change out of, and decided to take a stroll to get his mind off things.

A lap around the circus seemed to be fine, until he passed by Pomni’s door once again.

He pulled a key from his pocket, hesitantly unlocking the door. It made a horrid creaking sound that made Jax wince, his steps soft and delicate compared to the creaking of the door.

Jax shut the door behind him. The lights were off, the only sound in the room being his and Pomni’s soft breathing. Pomni, who was currently sleeping, her pillow wet from what he assumed was tears.

He glanced around the room for a moment. The building blocks in each corner, the carpet underneath his paws with a stain littered in the fabric.

And that book. A book colored red, blue, and yellow. Everyone who came into the circus got their very own, one that was personalized to their avatar. Jax’s was a fuzzy purple with a yellow rim and bunny ears at the top, but he ripped out most of the pages a few months ago.

…

He knew it was wrong. But when was anything he did ever right?

Jax took Pomni’s notebook, and flipped it to a random page, which just so happened to be her latest entry. A few days ago, even. It seemed to be a poem. His eyes traced the page.

“i look in people’s windows, transfixed by rose golden glows.

hoping he’ll see me, i sit, loving like a puppy.

i think i found my family, but they’re so broken, it pains me.

maybe that bunny will see i’m worth calling.

and realize that being afraid is what makes him so lovely.

but for now i’ll weep in burrows of things that i keep

till he comes and saves me from my sleep.”

“Jax?”

Chapter Text

“Jax?”

Pomni shuffled, rubbing her eyelids as she sat up. Jax slammed the notebook shut, throwing it in the corner of the room. “Why were you looking through my journal?” She inquired, standing up and walking toward Jax, the thin white fabric dragging across the floor.

“Don’t worry about it, Pom-Pom.” He grinned, trying to ignore the heavy feeling on his chest after reading her poem. “You’re so sappy.” Jax stated.

Pomni puffed her cheeks. “At least I’m not emotionless.”

Jax’s smile faltered, and he rolled his eyes.

The jester took his hand arubtly, dragging him out of the room. “W-Woah there, tiny! Where are you taking me—?”

Pomni didn’t respond, bringing him into the same room they were in the other day. The frog’s. She slammed the door shut behind them, letting go of his hand. “Who are they?”

Jax put a hand on his hips. “Oh, them? Ha, I can’t even remember his name.”

“Ribbit? You said their name the other day.”

Jax pursed his lips, before scoffing. “I must’ve misspoke—Gah!” Jax looked down at his paws, which were currently getting soaked. Pomni’s eyes followed, lifting her leg up.

Water rose from the seams of the wall, knocking over a frame of Jax and the frog together. Jax rushed over to the small memorial, panicked. “No, no, no, no, no!”

The water filled up to Pomni’s knees, momentarily drowning Jax before he stood up, his ear glitching a bit as he watched his and Ribbit’s memories fade away.

His and Ribbit’s memories fade away. Literally. Right before his eyes, water drenched everything they had left together, until the water reached his neck. Pomni took his hand to distract him from his current thoughts, muttering. “Hold your breath.”

“What?”

“Hold your breath.”

Jax flexed his paw around Pomni’s soft hand. He shifted on his heels, tilting his head up above the water and taking a deep breath in. She nodded.

“Don’t be scared, I’ve done this before.”

Chapter Text

“Don’t be scared, I’ve done this before.”

Pomni reassured, before sinking under the water with the rabbit, her cheeks puffing up, face shifting hues. She looked over at Jax, but her eyes widened in shock when his teeth grew sharper and pupils disappeared.

It wasn’t anything special, but it was surprising, to say the least. Pomni gave his hand three squeezes, before gently letting go and throwing herself against the door. She roughly pushed it, until finally, it opened. Water poured out from everywhere, Jax following her out the door. They both coughed, choking on the air they struggled to take in.

The rabbit fell over, finding himself kneeling on the ground in defeat. Pomni raised an eyebrow, planting a soft palm on his back. “You okay?”

He gathered a destroyed picture of him and Ribbit together, holding it in his paws. Tears dropped from his eyes, his vision becoming blurry as he choked out what few words he could.

“My panic’s at the ceiling, but I’m face down on the carpet.”

Chapter Text

“My panic’s at the ceiling, but I’m face down on the carpet.”

Pomni frowned, leaning down and facing him. “Hey, hey… Breathe.”

Jax couldn’t, though, his breath ragged and quick. He choked out a sob, a rare moment of vulnerability, he held the drenched photo up to his chest, squinting his eyes. “A-Are you alright?”

“Tell me that you’re okay, and I’m fine.”

Chapter Text

“Tell me that you’re okay, and I’m fine.”

But Jax didn’t answer.

He choked out one last sob before dashing to his room, slipping over the pool of water that they had escaped from. Together.

Jax pushed open the door, locking it behind himself as he held the photo up to his chest of him and Ribbit, which was wet with tears, and an earlier flood.

Pomni stood still in the hallway. She could fix him, or so she thought. Even if it took years.

The jester gently knocked on his door. “Hey… Jax..” She said awkwardly, swaying her body back and forth.

No response.

“Hello?” Pomni whistled, knocking slightly harder.

No response.

Oh gosh darn it-

Pomni lifted her foot and kicked the door down, standing overtop it. Jax let out an exasperated sigh. “Seriously?! Caine just fixed that!”

She rolls her eyes, uncaring. Jax frowned, for the first time in what seemed like forever. A paper flitted out of his hands and to Pomni’s legs, to which she picked it up, the rabbit scrambling towards her.

Pomni held it gently. Jax’s genuine smile, Ribbit’s smug one. He seemed lively, it reminded her of him once before, when they were being… chaotic evil together.

She looked up at Jax, who’s ear was glitching out, similar to Ragatha on Pomni’s first day at the circus. 

Similar to Ragatha.

Was he abstracting? Before she could clarify anything, Jax’s ears dropped over as he turned away.

“Oh horror, oh horror, what did you see?”

Chapter Text

“Oh horror, oh horror, what did you see?”

Jax whispered. It echoed through the room, silence filling in. They could hear their own heartbeats pump in their ears, breaths tangling beneath each other, both shaky.

If organs were made of glass, you could consider Pomni’s heart shattered as she watched Jax’s ear slowly reach down toward his other limbs to infect him.

She teared up, lip quivering as she ran into his arms, holding his body tightly. Jax awkwardly pat her back, before pushing her off of him.

Pomni panicked, pulling his hands and locking them with hers, gaze fixed on his, albeit the circumstances.

She breathed deeply, gesturing with a nod for Jax to follow. And surprisingly, he did.

“Are… Are you gonna be okay?”

He paused, glancing to the side.

“No grave can hold my body down.”