Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The door behind you swings closed, the hinges rattling as you sigh. Today had been another bad day at work, and you weren’t ready to deal with your father yet. You still hear his yelling downstairs as you take off your backpack and toss it to the side of your bed. You remember that you haven’t locked your door yet, and quickly jog over to turn the knob while changing into one of your few casual shirts. The carpet still stinks from where he smashed the bottle against the wood last week, and the heat is making it waft into your room again. You don’t have the patience to sneak around his chair and grab the carpet cleaner you bought after last time, so you clip a clothespin around your nose and go to wash up. Your face still stings from where you hit the ground at work today, and the painful memory of your manager chewing you out is enough to get you to look away from the small broken mirror. You don’t enjoy looking at your face anyway. You check your phone instead, and find 5 missed texts from your boss. You’ll have to work some overtime next week or she’ll be on your ass for the rest of the month. It's not the best job you’ve had, but it's one you’ve kept, and one you need, so you shoot her back a thumbs up. At least you’re home now, and can go back to your real home. The only one you’ve really ever liked, or so you can remember. You’ve played through the game a dozen times now, probably more if you’re being honest with yourself, but you find yourself drawn back in every night. You aren’t sure what about it connects with you on a deeper level, but every time you find yourself back in Hometown it just feels… right, like you’re where you’re meant to be. So, as you sit down and open your laptop, you know exactly which shortcut you’ll be navigating to. 

ARE YOU

THERE?

ARE WE

CONNECTED?

Wow, you must have been more tired than you remembered, or your father forgot to pay the electric bill again, because the darkness feels… different, more encompassing this time. Every time the man behind your connection speaks, the shadows grow longer at the corners of your eyes. This can’t just be the normal game, right? Something is definitely off, but you find the determination to proceed. It can’t be worse than being left alone with your thoughts.

EXCELLENT

TRULY EXCELLENT

NOW

WE MAY

BEGIN

YOU MUST CREATE 

A VESSEL.

THIS VESSEL

IS SPECIAL

IT IS

THE ESSENCE 

OF YOUR BEING

YOUR VERY

FORM ITSELF

DO NOT 

WASTE IT

You’re enthralled now, your eyes barely off the screen long enough to check the time on your phone. You thought you might’ve fallen asleep and this was a dream, but the clock stayed consistent. Though it could have been a mod, you swore you hadn’t enabled any before this playthrough. This dialogue was new, maybe from an update recently, or… something else. Before you think on it any further, you begin to sort through the vessel heads, none of them particularly catching your eye. You’ve used all of them at least once by now, but you want to make sure you follow the man’s instructions as well as you can. After all, it's discarded anyway, so what’s the harm in putting some thought into it this time. After a minute of deliberation, you decide on the 6th head, with a part and something like curtain bangs. You’ve always thought something similar would look good on you, but you never worked up the courage to actually try it. Maybe next month, once you get a better paycheck. The torso takes much less time to pick, and you almost click the jacket without looking. It's what you’ve used in every game, and speaks to your style better than any other choice in the sequence. Finally, for the legs, you just pick one of the 4 identical options with a larger right leg, since you favor that foot normally anyway. Satisfied that you’ve created the best vessel you could, you continue. 

EXCELLENT

YOU HAVE CREATED

A WONDERFUL FORM

NOW, LET US SHAPE YOUR MIND 

Your… mind? You frown and rub your eyes to make sure you’re looking at the screen correctly. So far, apart from the strange dialogue and darkness textures, everything has functioned the same, but now it seems to be diverging more, with the glow of your screen and the soft evening light coming through your window growing darker the longer you stare at the game. You’ll have to pay the bill again this month if you really are without power. As you refocus on the screen, your confusion continues as, as far as you can tell, your mind is already shaped, but you just assume this is an alternate line referencing the vessel and continue. 

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOOD?

This question was an easy one for you personally, and was one of the options you rarely chose for your vessel, so you quickly navigated to Cold. Since you can remember, you detested heated foods of any kind, and your taste for ice cream was unmatched as a kid. You smile and let out a small laugh as you imagine your gray vessel with the same enthusiasm. 

YOUR FAVORITE BLOOD TYPE?

While food might’ve been a simple choice, this one was the exact opposite. You didn’t really know your exact blood type, and you weren’t sure if you should even consider C or D valid options considering the earlier dialogue. Ultimately, you decide on a middle ground and pick AB, since it's both unique and actually real. You hope this won’t affect the game later on, because you’ve never remembered your vessel’s blood type before this point and aren’t about to start now.

WHAT COLOR DO YOU LIKE MOST 

You take a minute with this choice too, as your actual favorite color, purple, is absent from the menu. Since this vessel is meant to reflect you as a person, you ultimately decide on green, as the color of kindness has always resonated with you on an emotional level. You hope the vessel will feel the same, if that’s even a thing you can think about.

PLEASE GIVE YOURSELF TWO GIFTS

Another dialogue change, and this one actually expands your options. You’re starting to think that this vessel might actually be important, so stop and strategize before selecting any gifts. After playing through the scenarios in your mind, you decide that voice must be your first choice, and try to seem confident as you click it. To you, this choice is obvious, as any form of communication requires the ability to learn language, and having to play a full game without any speech options would probably make things incredibly difficult. Sure enough, the option goes gray once you select it, and you are left with the remaining gifts to choose from. At first, you heavily learn towards kindness, especially since you’ve begun the theme with green, but ultimately pull away from the option at the last second. You aren’t sure of anything in this version of the game, but you’re at least convinced that the favorite color question will mean something for ACTs or combat down the line, meaning you’d already get access to some kindness-based skills. You also realize that, unlike other options, kindness can be learned by anyone, and it would be easier to boost the skill to the levels you want in-game instead of skipping a critical ability you can get now. With kindness out, mind becomes the choice which sticks out to you most, and you figure ambition and integrity can be learned or gained as needed. So, after going over your rationale, you click mind, and the sequence continues. 

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT YOURSELF? 

A weirdly personal question, in your opinion, but you suppose the whole sequence has been that way. You are about to click Love, your default option, when the emotions which usually come with discarding your vessel well up tenfold in your choice. This isn’t just another one of your creations, this is you distilled, or as close as you could get within the confines of the game. As you look at it and what traits you’ve bestowed on it, fear, not love, bubbles up in you. You don’t feel scared because this vessel is uniquely worse or more frightening than the others, but because it feels too personal, like it's a better you than you ever were. After a deep sigh, you reluctantly click fear, and hope it doesn’t screw up your game. 

HAVE YOU ANSWERED HONESTLY

Of course, you play it safe and click yes. If there is some new content to the game, you don’t want to be locked out because you tried to be snarky. You want this vessel badly now, more than any other you’ve created.

DO YOU ACKNOWLEDGE THE POSSIBILITY OF PAIN AND SEIZURE?

You knew this was coming, but you hesitate all the same. On one hand, sticking to the scripted answer has seemingly continued to present changed dialogue so far, and the sequence appears to be heading the same direction it does in a traditional game. But, in your heart, or maybe your SOUL, you feel that yes is not your true answer. The man asked you to be honest and true, and you truly do not want to acknowledge that your creation could be seized, not this time. Of all things, this game should not be inspiring new emotional crises in you, but you find yourself paralyzed again nonetheless. After what feels like hours, you make up your mind, and gingerly click the no button. The game flashes a deep red for a quick second before showing the same question. You press it again, expecting the game to just skip like it has before, but instead you are met with the same quick red flash and the question again. You’ve found more new content, it seems, but you can hardly focus on that. You feel a bit nauseous as you move your mouse to no once again, the red turning even deeper as you continue to persist in your denial. It feels as though you were punched in the gut, and you distantly wonder if your lunch has given you food poisoning again as your eyes grow heavy. Something is definitely wrong, the text on your screen warping and almost moving the more the game flashes. You can’t give up now, even as the game has become essentially nonfunctional apart from moving your mouse to a part of the screen and clicking. Finally, the screen becomes essentially a blur of black and red, and a final click in the area where NO might have once been produces a brilliant crimson light that consumes your vision.

INTRIGUING 

I HAD NOT

EXPECTED

SUCH RESISTANCE

BECAUSE OF 

YOUR DETERMINATION

OUR CONNECTION

WAVERS

IT MUST

BE SALVAGED

YOU MUST

BE SALVAGED

You can barely see as the red light overtakes you, a feeling of near weightlessness overtaking any sensations your room may have produced. Your vision is taken up by nothing but the ominous black waves of the void now, and you stare dumbfounded as large white letters begin to flash in front of your face. The last thing you remember before the darkness consumes you is a strained female voice whispering to you, telling you that no one can choose who they are in this world.

THIS EXPERIMENT 

WILL PROVE

VERY, VERY 

INTERESTING

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When they wake up, they’re cold, shivering as the gentle snowfall coats their jacket. They aren’t sure where they even are, and the thought scares them. It's some sort of forest (if they even know that word), but not a very dense one. The child looks through the pine trees at a nearby road, gray pupils scanning to find anything familiar, but sees only some sort of Monster, thundering down both sides of the road. They quake in fear at the thought of approaching one, but the numbness spreading up their limbs is enough to get them up from the snowbank. The first time they stand is the worst, and instant pain shoots up their legs as they fall forwards, barely able to get a step closer to the road. The cold was pleasant before, but if it did this they were more than eager to get out of it. A gray hand reaches out to take hold of a low branch, and, heaving themselves up, the child takes a few more steps. It still hurts, but it gets easier every time, and eventually they reach the side of the road. It’s jet black with yellow lines down the middle, which makes the child wonder how such a thing ended up here. Maybe such things just appeared here, like they did. They take a step onto the road, their eyes scanning the horizon and going wide in awe. On the other side of the road lies a mountain, a truly immense mound of rock and dirt which towers over the puny pine trees and even smaller child. They don’t know the word for it, but it was beautiful, and they felt something welling up in their SOUL as they walked a few steps closer. They didn’t make it across the yellow line before one of the Monsters screeched to a halt inches from their face. They let out a scream and fall onto the road, the hard surface causing another groan of pain as they try to run back into the woods to no avail. It was like their legs wouldn’t move, their breath growing increasingly shaky as panic overtook their mind. The monster woman who stepped out of the car stares down at the shaking gray mass with a mix of anger and confusion, her heels clicking against the pavement as she picks up her phone 

“Yes Toriel, it's a child of some kind, I know what a child looks like for Angel’s sake! Just tell me how to calm it down so I can get it out of my way. I have a meeting with the Governor in an hour and I can’t be late,” She huffs and steps towards the child again, reaching out an arm and grabbing their’s. At first, the child flinches and scrambles back, but relaxes as they feel how cold her arm is. They feel like they shouldn’t be liking this, but it brings them comfort regardless, and they slowly begin to calm down.

“No, I didn’t know about not touching someone during a panic attack, I’m not a teacher! That’s what I called you…” Her voice trailed off as the child lifted their face to look at the monster, her own visibly dropping as tears began to well in the gray human’s eyes. Did they do something wrong, was the strange woman angry at them?

“You… you're a human? A gray human? What could, what even… Yes, Toriel, there’s a gray human in the middle of the road. I need you to come down to the Heights station of the ECPD, I don’t have time to give a statement. I know it's technically lying, but this isn’t a situation I’m equipped to handle. Yes, I get it, and I’ll come back after the meeting. Thank you, Toriel, I’ll see you there,” She put down the phone with a click and tugged on the child’s sleeve. They silently tried to get up, only to wobble and almost stumble back onto the pavement.

“Get up, child. This isn’t a place you can just sit and wait. You’re coming with me for now, I’ll take you back to whoever your family is. Do you, er, have a name?” The child stared silently while the monster put her head in her palm, shaking it back and forth as she led the child to the backseat of the car. This was going to be a long day, she could feel it already. 

—---—---—---—---—---—---—---—---—---—---—---—---—---—---—---—---

“This doesn’t add up, Lieutenant. Two nonverbal human children show up around Mt.Ebbot on the same day, one missing from foster care for weeks and one with complete retrograde amnesia and severe SOUL damage, and that’s just supposed to be a coincidence? This one at least makes sense, considering their record in the system,” With a bony finger, the older human in front of both children pointed at the child’s companion. They were about the same age, but the other child was much more… yellow than they themself were, not to mention active. They had nearly had another panic attack with how much tugging, pinching, and general bother they had experienced just sitting in that room alone with the other child. Eventually, the other human had entered, introduced themself as Detective Cal Harmen, and had begun to ask both of them questions. While the other child seemed purposefully reluctant to answer anything, and went completely still after the detective had asked how they’d gotten to Mt.Ebbot, the gray child simply was unable to answer any of the questions they asked. They had no memory of how they’d ended up in a snowbank outside of the city, nor anything about themself or their past, apart from maybe an affinity for cold. Even if they did know, they couldn’t express it, and could only try to imitate the mannerisms of the detective to form any kind of response. 

“Well, we certainly can’t keep them at the police station overnight, and we’ve already tried to contact this one’s former foster home. To put it nicely, they weren’t the types we want taking on children of any kind, much less troubled youths. Tell you what, you try a couple more questions, and I’ll go talk to the lady who brought them in. She might be able to get something out of them,” The taller monster, a  horse named Lieutenant Goll, sighed again and left the room. He did that a lot, the child noted, but not as much as Detective Cal. To them it seemed like second nature. Their deep yellow eyes stared with confusion at the child and daggers at their counterpart as the detective got out a notepad from the pocket of their large beige coat. It looked sort of funny to the child, but they were too scared of Cal to try and communicate it, so they settled for pointing at it and shaking their head in affirmation, a tactic Cal had used to coax answers out of them. The detective chuckled before sitting back down in the chrome chair set up for interrogations. 

“Glad you like it, kid. Got it back in Tulsa when I was younger, not that you’d know what that is. Let’s see where we were last time we met,” They quickly flipped through the notepad to find where their notes had ended, then carefully removed a laminated piece of paper from the leather satchel which hung around their left shoulder. 

“I don’t think I’ve had to use this for years, but I’m glad I had it with me today. Alright, Gray, since you somehow didn’t even register on the SOUL spectrum when we tested you, we’re gonna have to do this the old fashioned way. Take a look at this and point to the one which, how do I put this, speaks to you? The one that makes you feel strong inside,”. The detective tried to slide the paper over to the child (or, in Cal’s mind, Gray, since they hadn’t remembered their real name), but the troublemaker was faster, proudly pointing to the red SOUL while giving Gray a thumbs down with their other hand. The detective groaned and snatched the paper back, passing it over to the apprehensive Gray. Under their breath, Cal whispered 

“Angel, those determination freaks haven’t changed a bit since I was a kid. If it were my decision, we’d have left them all to the monsters during the war,”. Then, louder, they began to lecture.

“Red, please, I don’t want to spend more time here restraining a toddler because you couldn’t play nice. I’ve seen your records, I know you’re smart enough to know not to pull stunts like this in a police station. And, let me remind you that with Gray’s whole…. Um…. lack of a detectable SOUL and unusual skin condition , they shouldn’t even be sitting here right now by conventional medical standards, and any injury on your part could lead to a catastrophe we’d put on you,” They finished with a disappointed look they hoped would drive home the point, but was instead met with a stuck-out tongue and another two thumbs down. The sigh that followed startled the child out of their focus on the paper, and they caught the end of another whisper about remembering the age of your suspects before the detective’s eyes focused back on them. 

“You got it, kid? Just point to whichever speaks to your soul, metaphorically,” Cal adjusted their deep-brown slouch to get a better look at what the kid was pointing to, but found it snagging on their short ponytail. They made a mental reminder to go in for a haircut as they decided to just place the hat next to the satchel, only to see Gray pointing again and again to the purple heart, which symbolized the SOUL associated with perseverance. This was unexpected, but not entirely unwarranted, the detective supposed. The child did manage to survive one of the only events classified as permanently fatal to humans. If that wasn’t perseverance, they weren’t sure what was, but their behavior since had been significantly different from what was expected of a bearer of the purple SOUL. 

“Hey, Gray, can you read these symbols for me?” Cal pointed at the letters under each heart which spelled out the SOUL they represented, but the child only shook their head and tried (rather unsuccessfully) to imitate the collected shrug Red had adopted as their primary gesture with the detective.

“Hm, okay then. Since we don’t have anything else to go on in regards to your SOUL, and you appear to be otherwise healthy, we’ll tell your caretaker to watch for signs of SOUL development and monitor your… unusual appearance,” they spoke more to themselves than to Gray, writing down their recommendations onto a new page of the notepad as she heard the Lieutenant approaching.

“Well, you two, it appears my boss is here with someone special, meaning it's my queue to leave. It was nice to meet you both, I don’t get to see other humans around here often,” Cal gathered their things, leaving the list of notes for Gray, and did some sort of bow (the child wasn’t really certain what it was meant to mean, but Red seemed amused, so they assumed it was something funny) before ducking out of the room, allowing Lieutenant Goll and the woman (whose name the child couldn’t quite remember, something with a T) to step inside. Behind them was a new man who the child hadn’t seen before, one who looked a lot like the angry deer monster who had found them in the first place. 

“Really, I’m glad you called me, Tori. You know how Carol can get when she’s stressed, but it wasn’t okay for her to leave you with this alone. I promise we’ll help out however we can, whatever you need! Besides, I still feel bad I didn’t get to know Frisk better before they went off to see the world. Maybe this is the Angel telling me that talking to humans is my fate, faha!”. The lieutenant pulled up a second chair and both the deer and goat monsters sat down, eyes still on each other.

“Oh Rudy, you know I’m not mad at you for that silly thing. Frisk was already 16 when we took them in, and Carol had just started her first campaign. I’d be more surprised if your family did find time to look after them! Anyhow, that was almost 10 years ago now, and I understand how demanding Carol’s job is. You still got here when it mattered, so no harm done!” The Lieutenant cleared his throat to speak, causing both to fall silent and focus their attention on the children, who had both gone still in their seats. 

“Hello kids, my name is Lieutenant Goll. I hope my colleague told you a bit about why you’re here, but just in case, let me explain a bit more. You were both found on the same road alone, and have very few records available to us to locate any parents or guardians, none in your case,” He gestured towards the gray child as he picked up the note the detective left on the table.

“Because of that, we need you to have at least a temporary place to stay while the system sorts things out. You’ve both met Mrs.Dreemurr, and this is Mr.Holiday. You have met his wife, I think,” He gestured to the child once again as he turned towards the adults. The child looked down at their hands, feeling guilty and worried about what was to come. They had barely understood any of what the Lieutenant had said, only that the two other monsters were here because of them and their companion. 

“They will be taking you both back to Hometown to stay with them later today. It's a nice place, out of the city and as safe as you can get. Now, Mrs.Dreemurr, you have had experience with taking care of humans before, correct?”. They had taken out a stack of papers and were going through them slowly, barely even acknowledging the two children in the room. Slowly, both began to fall asleep. 

“That’s right, Lieutenant. My husband and I fostered a human youth through the system before our son was born. It was only two years, though, and they were nearly grown. I’m sure I still remember most of it, and we have a great library if not. I’ve already spoken to my husband about it, and we believe a safe and calm environment would be best for these children to recover from what they’ve been through. I can vouch for the Holidays, as well, if it's needed. They’ve been our friends for many years, and they have the same standards we do for the home,” Toriel smiled and looked over at Rudy, who was busy going through the mountain of paperwork required to ensure everything went smoothly.

“That’s great to hear, Mrs.Dreemurr. Now, as you can imagine, these children have slightly different needs than the average human, which may present unique challenges. To start with commonalities, both are able to speak but are adverse to actually doing so, which may mean alternate methods of communication if they remain uncomfortable with verbal speech. Both have some form of amnesia, though one is much more severe than the other, and may experience trouble with repressed memories or trauma. We really have no idea what happened to get them into the woods, so it may become a sensitive topic for them as they grow. The last major similarity here is their name situation. As you know, one has total retrograde amnesia, so they are unable to remember a name and we can’t find one until we find them in the records, which we haven’t been able to so far. The other one does have a government-given name, but they show strong aversion to it, and so we have redacted it from everything but legal documents. If you move forward with the foster process, I would suggest doing your research on these unique conditions and adapting accordingly, which should be relatively straightforward. However, our first child has some challenges which are not accommodated as regularly. As is, um, obvious, their SOUL is either missing or entirely weak, and they have no memories of any events in their life up to today. This symptom is relatively common for young children experiencing severe physical or mental trauma, but the issue with the SOUL is much more concerning and pressing. We had an immediate medical intervention when they first arrived, but they were unable to find anything physically wrong with the child apart from the aforementioned lack of SOUL and peculiar lack of features. Though their body functions normally for now, it is advised that you keep emergency equipment on hand, as this condition is usually always fatal and this presents a medical edge case we are unable to really treat at the moment. Apart from that, there isn’t much to say due to the memory loss. Their brain functions appear to be average for a child of their age, but they will have to do a lot of catching up in school because they appear to have forgotten many basic skills. According to my colleague, they have shown a particular affinity for cold, which could be useful in making them feel comfortable at home,” He stopped to clear his throat and turned the note over, the child now keenly aware of what they were saying, even if they could only understand parts. 

“Well, it seems they’re in luck then! Casa Holiday is always cool as can be,” He winked at the gray child, which got a confused reaction and an awkward thumbs up. He realized they might not know what that meant and awkwardly went back to finishing paperwork, trying to avoid direct eye contact. Hopefully the car ride would go better.

 “As for the second child, they appear to be healthy in both SOUL and body, as far as we can tell. If you’re familiar with science around human souls, you know red SOULS are relatively rare, but otherwise as harmless as any other type, so you shouldn’t have any problems there. There does appear to be a slight developmental delay, but it's really too early to tell if it's a real problem, so I wouldn’t worry too much. The main thing you’ll have to work on are behavioral issues, which they have quite the extensive record of. Granted, you both seem like compassionate folks, so perhaps they will calm down compared to previous placements,” He folded the note with a breath, and took all of the signed papers as he stood up to leave.

“Well then, that’s about it on my end. I’ll get all of this processed for y’all as quickly as I can, but it’ll still be a few minutes. If you don’t mind, staying with the kids might be helpful to get to know them better,” He gave a weary smile and left the room, the gray child looking at both adult monsters and the other staring down at the floor. Gently, Toriel got up and walked over to where they were sitting, kneeling to get down to their level and asking them if they were okay. The gray child’s attention snapped to Rudy, who had finally lifted his gaze and was giving them a warm smile.

“So, you like the cold, huh? Me too. I have a daughter about your age, and she can’t stay away from the freezer these days, fahaha! Carol always says I need to stop buying ice cream, but who can resist cookies and cream? Say, do you like Christmas, too?” He stared intently at his phone, trying to find one of the recent family photos, as the child gave a simple shrug. They weren’t really sure what Christmas entailed, but if it had to do with the cold it was probably something they’d like.

“Yeah, I guess you wouldn't know. Well, if we can bring you back tonight, I’m sure both of my daughters would be happy to show you what it's all about. How does that sound?” The child had never really thought about other kids their age being kind before, especially with the influence of their cellmate, but the idea resonated with a deeper part of them, one that yearned to be shown the same kindness Rudy had shown them now every day. They nodded enthusiastically, giving two thumbs ups while Rudy laughed and put down his phone. 

“I suppose you can just meet them at home then, since it sounds like that’s where you’re going, faha!” The child gave another strong nod and tried their best to recreate Rudy’s smile, getting up for the chair to hug the deer monster. Toriel and the red-SOULed child hadn’t come to the exact same agreement, but there had clearly been some sort of understanding reached, as their red eyes were filled with tears as they hugged Toriel. After a long few minutes of silence, the Lieutenant came back in and told them they were free to go when they wished. The official confirmation would take a few days, but the legality was all sorted out for now. There was a tense period where Toriel watched them both while Rudy nearly had a screaming match with Carol outside, but Rudy won out in the end, and the 4 found themselves walking back to their cars just before midnight. 

“Tori, there’s one last thing before we go,” Rudy spoke with a more confident tone, and, kneeling down to talk to both children, ignored Toriel’s suspicious look. 

“Well, kids, do you both like Christmas?” Two emphatic heads shot up and down.

“And you’re both in need of a new name, is that right?” This got a less certain nod from the red-eyed child and a way thumbs up from the gray. 

“Rudy, don’t you think this is a bit premature? Besides, Asgore had something in mind for this little one,” She patted the child’s dark brown mop as they looked at her with confusion

“Tori, you know what Asgore does with names. I want you to ask yourself if you really want this child to be named something like… Togore…. For their entire life.,” At this, the child shook their head no, and Toriel stifled a small laugh.

“Very well, Rudy, but I must say that your choices tend to be equally, er, creative,” 

“Don’t listen to her kids, she doesn’t have the Christmas spirit like you do. It's an old tradition in the Holiday family to name children after the things that embody winter the most, and you two certainly shouldn’t miss out,” He turned to the red-eyed child first, and smirked at their green sweater.

“Well, red and green are certainly indicative colors, Krismas,” The child’s eyes went wide and they loosened their grip on Toriel’s hand, just a bit. 

“How does that sound, Kris? Fit like a glove, or a stocking, fahaha?” Rudy laughed, but cut himself off when the short burst of nodding became a faint “Thank You” from Kris.

“Well, there it is, then! Kris, it's so nice to meet you. Now, as for you, my little snowmonster, I have an idea I think you’ll like. You aren’t one to conform to anyone’s expectations, certainly not medicine’s. You could be any festival or holiday you wanted, little one. You could be anything, Yule,” The name brings tears to the child’s eyes, and the running embrace is more than enough to signal their acceptance. 

“Yule and Krismas, really, Rudy? You’re lucky they like them, or we would’ve gone with Togore. Asgore will be devastated,” Toriel gave an annoyed sigh but took Kris’ hand nonetheless, and Rudy did the same to Yule.

“I saved you a headache, Tori. Imagine Dess and Asriel’s reaction if they found out you named a human after yourselves, faha! We should be heading out, but we’ll catch up tomorrow morning. We can take the kids out to QC’s, my treat.” 

“That would be wonderful, Rudy. I’ll see you both there. Come, Kris, we should get going before Asgore gets worried. Goodbye for tonight, Yule. I hope we see a lot more of each other in the future.”

It was the best feeling in the world as Yule fell asleep in the back of the Holiday van, like liquid kindness wrapping them in its arms.

Chapter Text

“Ground control to the dork squad! You were supposed to be up 10 minutes ago, over!” Dess did her best to imitate a walkie talkie as she banged on the door, the wood reverberating against her fingers to no avail. She sighed and tried again, silently hoping Mom wouldn’t pin this on her again. It wasn’t her fault that Elly and Yule slept like they’d been awake for the last week. 

“If you’re not down by the time the Dreemurrs get here, Mom’s gonna take the computer again!” Again the door shook, and again there was no shift in the room beyond. This was getting annoying. They were literally throwing a party just for two people, and one of them was refusing to be on time. If she wasn’t able to get Dragon Blazers up before Azzy got there because of this, she’d give them both the Kris Special. Actually, now that she thought about it, that might not be such a bad idea.

“Look, if you two aren’t downstairs in 15 minutes, I’ll be forced to unleash Kris into the room, no restraints. I’ll even let them borrow my bat.” The deadly serious tone she took proved to be enough, and she heard the rustling and frantic whispering she’d hoped for. She turned away from the door and ducked back into her own room, the freshly painted door still giving off a strong smell that made her nose wrinkle (in hindsight, Dad might’ve been right about her choice of black paint being a bit strong). If she could hurry up, she could sneak Blood Crushers into her room before she had to get dressed up for the party. She still couldn’t believe they all had to get formal for signing a few papers, but Mom had insisted on an entire new set of family photos along with the Dreemurrs. Oh well, she could still make something out of it with Azzy, and, knowing Kris, they’d find a way to cause a fire before they even finished taking pictures. 

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They just needed 5 more minutes to get up, just a little longer. They’d stayed up 3 hours past bedtime reading a new Creepypasta with Elly, and now they couldn’t get that face out of their head. It was just an edited mix of a skeleton monster and human face, the wiki had said, but the story said he could sneak into your house all the same. However, no amount of extra sleep could get Yule to stay in bed after Dess mentioned Kris. If they were scared of Jerry the Slasher, they were petrified of Kris, especially what they would do to the room if left unchecked. Mom had already had to buy a new wardrobe for Elly after Kris knocked it over trying to “gather intel” while Yule napped, and their green-tinged gray eyes now darted towards the bunk bed ladder with fear. If Kris ever gained a height advantage over them, they’d be toast. 

It seemed like Noelle had the same thought, and they heard her sheets rustling as she got up. At this point, it was useless to stay in bed, so Yule carefully climbed over the ladder and began to descend. It was difficult at first, like it usually was, and their gray fingers could barely grasp the sides hard enough to get down. Dad and the doctor thought it was best to give Elly the top bunk until they regained full color, but Mom had insisted that they needed to “learn to use their hands” as soon as possible. They hadn’t minded, though. Mom was usually right, and the doctor said that using their SOUL as much as possible would speed up the process of healing. They glanced at their palm as they finished the descent, now a lighter olive instead of the gray they had always known. It made them feel good, like they fit in. They were proud they didn’t need those horns Azzy had bought Kris for their birthday or a set of antlers like Aunt Toriel had suggested. Like Dad said, they were always a Holiday at heart. 

“You… awake?” They asked in Noelle’s general direction, one eye blearily looking towards the bottom bunk as they stepped off the ladder. She nodded, rubbing her eyes about as hard as they had been. Speaking was still difficult for them sometimes, but Alphys and Aunt Toriel had been giving them special help to catch up, and Mom said it was important, so they tried their best. They smiled as they thought about finally being able to be as cool as Dess and Frisk. Azzy said they could both talk for hours about anything they wanted, anything! They’d been practicing their r’s for hours in anticipation of Frisk’s visit today, and they were determined to be the cooler human in Hometown, at least for one day. Kris barely wanted to speak anyway, so they deserved this honor. They hadn’t actually met Frisk yet, but Azzy said they were the coolest person he knew (besides Dess, obviously) and a human to boot. Yule hadn’t met another one since…. that night. 

“Hey Yuletide! Didya sleep at all last night after that story, because I couldn’t!” Yule shook their head a bit while she giggled. They were about to flop onto the new teal couch (which, much to both Holiday’s chagrin, did not face a TV. They’d have to get a bit older to get one of those according to Dad) to finish working off the brain fog from the night when they spied the time on the computer monitor. What had begun as 15 minutes had turned into 10, and they hadn’t even started getting ready, much less looking presentable. They knew Dad would let them off easy if they looked a bit frazzled, but they had to at least be in their clothes and out of the room.

“Elly…. 10 minutes… get dressed…” They called as they nearly tripped on the green carpet placed between the couch, their desk, and the empty table they hoped would eventually house a TV. 

“Wait, it's been that long already? How are we going to change that fast, Yule? Mom’ll rip her hair out if we mess up today!” A look of panic flashed around her face and her nose began to glow faintly as she leaped out of the bed. Her ears were rapidly gyrating as she made a dead sprint towards her desk, where a new red dress lay ready for the coming reception. 

“Don’t… worry…. we got… this one,” They tried to sound brave, but it ended up coming out raspy, and they made a mental note to work on that with Alphys as they rapidly unwrapped the equally fresh green dress from its protective cover. The matching dresses had been their Mom’s idea, and only Noelle seemed really happy about it. Dess had insisted on the grayest “white” she could find, and Yule had always avoided anything too puffy or colorful. It made them stand out, which was about the opposite of what they were hoping for, and the green only slightly made up for the awkward matching pattern Dad had suggested for them and Noelle. Dess had called it “tacky”, and Yule agreed, even if they weren’t sure what it meant. 

Their hands felt like they were flying as they got the dress on and called Elly over to tie the back before awkwardly repeating the same for her. Between their fingers still feeling numb and the lack of an actual mirror in the room, it took longer than either would’ve liked, but finished with just enough time to burst through the door and run into the bathroom. Judging by the state of the counter, and the black toothbrush left in the sink, Dess had already gotten to it, so they figured she could take the fall if it ended up a little messier. They quickly wetted their own hair and made a hasty middle part out of the various long strands which hung around their face, then snatched one of the 3 brushes (they weren’t sure which one, but they couldn’t be bothered to check at this point) and made the back of their hair as neat as it could be. It was already extremely messy when they were found, but since strands of blond had appeared in it, it had grown past their shoulders and now threatened to make them look more like a human-shaped tumbleweed than a person.. Mom would’ve wanted a ponytail for the photos, but they couldn’t manage it themself, and couldn’t ask Elly to waste precious time, so they figured it would be good enough and moved to brush their teeth as fast as possible. The green toothbrush joining the black in the sink prompted Elly to shoot them a look, but they simply shrugged and stepped back from the countertop. It took at least another minute for them both to be ready (since Noelle always insisted on actually taking care of her teeth), but they made it down the stairs just in time.

“Glad you two could make it to greet your own guests, faha!” Dad stood in the kitchen entryway carrying a snack platter, which he sat gingerly on the living room table. 

“Go check in with your Mom, okay? She wasn’t happy when Dess told her you were still asleep, and I’m afraid she’s taking it out on your poor sister. They’re setting the table while all of the food is still cooking, courtesy of your dear old Dad. But, just as a treat for the two of you, I whipped this up to distract Asgore. You know how much he enjoys these things, it’ll keep him busy for hours! Now, don’t be too long with the ladies of the house, the Dreemurrs should be here any minute,” He led them towards the kitchen with a sweeping bow, closing the door behind them and leaving Yule staring at a very annoyed deer monster in a navy blue blazer. The sound of her black heels reverberated in Yule’s mind as she approached, like the church bell announcing the start of the day’s service, or, in their case, funeral.

“Noelle. Yule. You were supposed to be ready and downstairs 20 minutes ago. Instead, I had to send your sister to get you up, and now you show up looking like… this. Normally, I’d have to take away your computer, but because it's a special day, you two may show that you’re sorry by helping your sister finish setting the table before the Dreemurrs arrive. I expect both of you to be more punctual in the future, understood?” She barely acknowledged their nods and Yule’s whispered apology as she stepped past them and into the kitchen, checking the various pots and pans on the stove while Dess glared at the pair from the table. They both awkwardly shuffled over, Yule moving to the seat to the right of Dess while Noelle moved to the left.

“Really bringing it down to the wire there, huh? You’re dead after the pictures, dork squad,” She rasped through gritted teeth, shoving handfuls of silverware to either side of her. She looked much less threatening in a gray dress and snowflake earrings than she did with her traditional camo jacket and combat boots, so both siblings gave a look and continued to set the table. Eventually, though, the image of Dess chasing them with a wiffle bat in this outfit overcame Yule’s self control, and they let out a muffled snicker while they laid out a butter knife. This had been a misstep, and Dess’ head snapped towards them to signal it.

“What’s so funny, twerp? Your printer run out of ink again?” Dess snarled, her ears pressed against her jet black hair. Normally, this type of comment would’ve sent Yule running to their Dad, but now it just felt… sad? Not like she could do anything to them today, anyway. 

“You… look… cute… Doe-Si-Doh” Yule whispered the name as quietly as they could with Dess able to hear, and that did it. Noelle had told them about the nickname Dad had given Dess as a baby, and they had been waiting for just a moment like this to use it. Its effect did not disappoint, as Dess slammed down the remaining silverware and grabbed both siblings by the shoulder. 

“ALRIGHT Mom, we’re done setting the table. I’m going to bring Yuletide and Noelle here to the family room so we can CHAT a little bit before everyone gets here.” Yule thought they could hear Dess’ teeth grinding against each other as both their Mom and Noelle gave Dess a look of confusion. Their mother quickly composed herself and gave a short thanks before going back to supervising Dad’s cooking, leaving the younger children to Dess’ mercy. Yule began to panic as they realized that Dad had left the family room while they had been setting the table. That meant Dess had free reign, and she used it. As soon as the door shut behind them, Yule felt a fist slam into their midsection, sending them falling into the table and activating the Santa machine which sat upon it. Noelle ran to help them up, only to be met with Dess’ hoof in front of her. Her reaction time was too slow, and was barely able to land on her elbows to avoid the dress being damaged by the fall. Dess, now with both hands free, tugged Yule to their feet with an iron grip, Noelle still struggling on the floor.

“Listen, freak. I know this might be a game to you and my sister, but I don’t buy your facade for a second. I’m nice to you because I have to be, and that’s it. Let me make it loud and clear so you understand. You. Are. Not. My. Sibling. If you pull this shit again, I won’t be so nice, got it?” She ignored the tears welling in Yule’s eyes and yanked them towards Noelle, putting her arm in the same vice as she had theirs.

“Just because Mom and Dad like you, you expect to be able to mock me, Elly? Is that how it's gonna be from now on? Siding with them over me? When Mom forgets about you, don’t come crawling back to me…” Her eyes went wide as the front door swung open, revealing a very concerned Toriel in an elegant purple gown.

“Are we, er…. interrupting something, children?” Toriel asked as Dess swung both children around to face the Dreemurrs.

“Of course not, Aunt Toriel! We were just roughhousing a bit, playing… pirates! Yep, I was telling these two scoundrels they couldn’t crawl back to their ship once the Flying Dutchmonster got to them, hahaha! Ain’t that right, buddies!” She gave a firm squeeze to both of their shoulders, and they nodded in response. Yule tried to keep the tears back as Kris, squirming out of Asgore’s grip, ran up to Dess. They were in a black suit and tie that matched Asgore and Asriel, their hair tied back behind their signature crimson horned headband into a short bun that left their red eyes visible for the first time that Yule could remember. 

“Hey Elly, you like spiders, dontya?” Kris started, reaching into their suit pants before Toriel shot them a look, and they reluctantly backed off.

“Well, I’m glad everyone’s having fun, but remember to keep those clothes looking nice. Photos are in 30 minutes, and Frisk will be here in 15. Now, Asgore and I promised to help your parents with the cooking, so why don’t you all have fun for a little longer,” Toriel turned to Asriel and whispered something in his ear, and he nodded in response. Yule used this chance to squirm out from Dess’ grasp, and ran up to Asgore. They wanted to at least try and introduce themself like Mom had asked, even if it was a bit late.

“Good…. Morning… Uncle Asgore. Thank you… for coming” They were barely able to get the words out without coughing, their breath still ragged from Dess’ hit. 

“Hey champ, thanks for saying hi! You’re getting better at it every time I see you, haha! Kris has been waiting to see you and Noelle all day, so don’t keep them waiting too long,” Asgore gave Yule a wink as Dess finally let go of Noelle and started to go upstairs with Asriel, probably to go watch inappropriate movies again. She looked happier now, and Yule felt like, just maybe, things would be better again after this. They left Asgore’s side as both Dreemurr parents walked towards the kitchen, and joined Kris and Noelle by the stairs.

“Do’ya think will still teach me piano after what you did? If she broke her promise, it's mud pies for you both,” Kris snickered and made a gesture Yule could only assume was meant to imitate slinging mud, which got a cringe out of both Holidays. Kris could be a great friend when they’d calmed down, but right now they were fired up, and Yule wanted a place they could collect themself and prepare before Frisk arrived. Unfortunately, there was only one room that was fully Kris proof, so they started to make for the stairs. 

“Going… to… bathroom…” they choked out, then quietly to Noelle: “I’m sorry… Elly”. She gave a look of utter betrayal as Kris began to turn on every mechanical Santa in the room, not for the first time.

“Looks like Aunt Carol is rubbing off on someone at least. Well, Elly, you’re gonna help me hunt for glue. I have a brilliant idea,” They heard her weakly protest as the bathroom door shut behind them, the sound disappearing as the pristine white of the tile floor shone in their vision. It was what they wanted to see every day: a clean, safe place just for them. One that was perfect, and oh so shiny. The tears came back harder this time as they approached the mirror. They were barely tall enough to look over it, but they could just make out the top of their face. It was mostly like the rest of their skin, olive colored with a lighter tinge where their hair kept it from the sunlight, but there were still visible streaks of gray. It wasn’t much anymore, but it was enough to remind them that they didn’t belong. Not here, in this town of monsters, not there, in majority human cities, nowhere. The doctor had said their very existence was an oddity, that it was wrong. They’d cried then too, but not as hard as they did now. Mom would get mad if their dress got wet, so they moved to the shower, leaning their head against the wall and letting the tears fall down the drain. Not even their own family thought they belonged there, not even the only other human they’d ever gotten to know. Kris had said as much before, it was unnatural that they were alive at all. Breathing came in struggling gasps now, and Yule’s hand gripped the fabric around their heart (not their SOUL, like everyone liked to remind them), their thoughts going back and forth between horrible moments and a past they couldn’t remember, a man behind a tree and a… voice in the wall? They froze, turning their head to press an ear to the shower wall. Of course, they’d been stupid again. Dess’ room was directly adjacent to the bathroom, she’d probably been talking the whole time. They silently prayed to the Angel that their outburst hadn’t been overheard, and tried again to catch whatever Dess and Azzy were talking about. Maybe they could figure out a way to fix this if they could just hear what was going on. Slowly, without them noticing, a faint green glow emanated from their dress.

“Look Azzy, I know it was messed up, but it was true, wasn’t it? Why would they ever say something like that without knowing it’d hurt?” Dess sounded… despondent, not at all like the “Coolest Kid in Town” they’d grown to recognize. Was this why she’d reacted so badly? What were they missing here?

“Hey, Dess, I know it hurts, I know, but how could Yule have possibly known that? They’ve only been here for long enough to meet him once or twice, and he promised you he’d never tell anyone about that name. They probably just got it from Elly, right? Little kids tease people all the time, at least we did, and Kris definitely does. We can’t blame them for it,” Asriel sounded… surprisingly reasonable for someone who had avoided touching them for a year because “they’ll turn me to stone”. 

“Its NOT just about the name, dumbass. I tried my best to love both of them, I really did, but it feels like all I get is… this! The disrespect, Azzy, I can’t go through it again. The first time, it took… you know…. To even get Mom to acknowledge that maybe her perfect little angel needs someone other than her grades,” She seemed to compose herself for a minute, giving Yule time to glance at the clock. They’d have to get up in a couple minutes if they wanted to meet Frisk at the door, but they figured they could listen for a bit longer. After all, how would they be able to make things better if they didn’t even know what was wrong in the first place.

“Look, Azzy, I’ll figure it out, but not right now. Frisk will be here in a minute, and then we have to do these stupid photos. I’ll work it out, I promise,” She tried to sound as sincere as she could, but even Yule could tell she wasn’t really feeling any better than she had when she’d punched them downstairs. 

“If you say so, Dess. I’ll always stick by you, but I’m telling you that this isn’t going to go away. Yule and Kris are here to stay, and Noelle knows that too. Neither are trying to bring you down, they’re just trying to be your siblings, okay? Sometimes, it seems like it’d be easier if we could just… disappear, but that’s not happening to either of us, so we have to learn to live with reality. Please, think about doing something to say you’re sorry before I leave tonight,” Asriel sighed, the sound followed by a noise Yule could only assume was Dess’ box spring signaling his intention to leave. 

“How are you nerds always so good at talking, huh? I’ll think about it, goat boy. Now get downstairs or your ass is grass!” Yule’s eyes went wide as they remembered that Dess and Asriel would also have to come downstairs to meet Frisk, and if they got caught snooping in the bathroom they could kiss any type of reconciliation goodbye. They burst out of the shower and shoved the door open with one arm, almost slipping on the stairs before barreling into Noelle, who was trying to stand between Kris and the last free mechanical Santa, sending both into the table. That’s how, when a tall human wearing a black leather jacket and motorcycle helmet stepped into the room, the first thing they saw was a pile of 3 children all trying to escape the relentless “HO HO HOs” of a Santa (and, in Kris’ case, the floor they’d accidentally glued themself to). They lifted their helmet, revealing someone who could pass for Kris, almost. 

They were much taller, almost as tall as Uncle Asgore, and their hair was a shade lighter than Kris’, though this wasn’t nearly as noticeable as how much shorter it was, cut just above the neck where Kris had wild hair that ran past their shoulders. They were much neater than Yule or Kris despite the superficial similarities, hair combed over and red eyes barely visible behind a pair of yellow and pink round glasses. They felt… oddly familiar, but that could just be the similarity of yellow skin tone and aura of determination Yule felt in their presence to Kris’ own. On a second glance, they had a much lankier build, and their eyes were much narrower than either of the human children before them. Before they could think of more differences to point out to Kris later, Noelle poked their back with her antler, and they were forced to roll over to avoid the same fate again. 

“So uh… what’s…” They were cut off by a flash of brown and white jumping down the stairs and trapping them in a hug, though it seemed more like a murder attempt as they nearly ended up right where Yule was, barely catching themself on the large fake plant Mom had insisted on placing next to the mechanical Santas for “balance” (Yule guessed she had been right about that, at least).

“Woah, woah, give me a bit of room to breathe here,” They took off their glasses to get a good look at Dess and Asriel, then laughed a bit.

“The God of Hyperdeath and Captain Blackhorns are looking dapper today, aren’t they? How have you been, you two?” A flash of anger was visible on Dess’ face, but only for a second, and both her and Asriel were bright red. Yule had never heard of “Captain Blackhorns”, but they figured it was probably best to avoid the subject after that morning.

“Come on, dude, that was years ago! You can’t still be hung up on losing to our superior tactics,” Dess crossed her arms in a faux victory pose as Asriel snickered. Frisk decided to change tactics, their arms shooting out and violently flicking both monster’s horns with their index finger. It was effective, and both doubled over in apparent pain. 

“Works every time on the dramatic duo over there. As much as I’d love to talk to my 2nd favorite sibling and 3rd favorite cousin, we don’t have all day before the photographers get here. Now, this bundle of… um… excitement are the people I came to see,” They walked towards the table where Noelle was just barely crawling out from under Kris, whose hand was now somehow glued to both the floor and their other hand, stopping to take off their riding jacket. Underneath, they wore a dark navy suit with a deep magenta tie, almost purple but not quite. Matching the Dreemurr theme, of course. A grunt from Kris reminded Yule that it was their mission to meet Frisk first, and they launched themself up from the floor, sending Noelle’s hooves right into Kris and getting an angry squeak from both. Despite the unfortunate circumstances, the move worked, and Yule was able to crawl out of the child-sized traffic jam and make a sprint for Frisk, who was now staring in bewilderment at the whole affair. This one was obviously the Holiday child, they looked like someone had just shaved a younger version of December and dyed their hair to match Carol’s. How they managed to come across a human that similar to their family was beyond Frisk, but it probably had something to do with the “medical condition” Toriel had mentioned on the phone. Yule finally made it up to Frisk and cleared their throat, hoping to recite the speech they’d been rehearsing all of last night. 

“Hi… Frisk! My name… is… Yule. I’m your…. new coolest cousin, faha!” They let out a short cough after the laugh, but Frisk didn’t seem to notice. They’d picked up the Holiday family laugh from Dad, yet it still felt weird in their throat sometimes, a fact they liked to avoid others picking up on.

“Well, Yule, it's great to meet you! I’m sure Azzy has told you plenty about me, but I’m so glad I could meet you here in person. Tell you what, after we take pictures and eat, I’ll show you some cool human tricks I’ve learned. Does that sound cool?” They saw a huge smile cross Yule’s face as they nodded. This routine always worked well with kids, especially ones who hadn’t seen much of either species. Growing up in monster households had its benefits, most of the time.

“While I go meet your sister and my own new sibling, why don’t you get the adults from the kitchen? I’m sure they’ll want to get you kids pretty before the photographers get here,” Yule nodded again and ran off towards the kitchen door, leaving Noelle, who was dusting off her dress, and Kris, who had managed to get their hands unstuck and was now trying to rub the glue off onto the table leg. Frisk flinched at first, seeing Kris’ red eyes shining as they approached the pair. The resemblance certainly wasn’t perfect, but it was uncanny. Similar troublemakers get into similar trouble, Frisk supposed. 

“Well well well, if it isn’t my long lost sibling. What was your name again, something starting with glue-eater?” That comment finally got Kris to direct their attention upwards, and they paused as soon as they saw Frisk. They knew Toriel had briefly taken in a human many years ago, but this one was so much older than they’d imagined, and way more similar to themself. If you didn’t look too hard, they were like biological siblings. That thought gave Kris some comfort, especially with how Yule had managed to perfectly fit into the Holiday aesthetic while they stuck out from the Dreemurrs like an apple in a tub of oranges. 

“Good one, Dr.Hornless. Who are you, the Slenderhuman?” This comment got a laugh out of Noelle, but only an awkward stare from Frisk. Kris guessed they didn’t know who that was, since they were about a million years old. Why did adults have to be so boring sometimes?

“I’m sure we’re going to get along great, Kris. Now, did I hear Toriel say that you liked the piano? I’ll show you a thing or two with Dess later, if you’re up for it,” This got Kris interested, and they ran up to hug Frisk, resulting in them getting picked up and tossed to Azzy, who was snickering in the corner with Dess.

“Sorry Azzy, you gotta deal with the glue problem. Good luck, it only looks like they used 3/4 of the tube!” It had been too long since they’d visited, and they sat down on the couch to invite Noelle to talk. It was going to be a long day, but a good one.

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“The kids love you, Frisky! How do you do it? I can barely get my own to listen to me these days, fahaha!” Dad laughed and set his drink down on the table, barely out of Yule’s view. They were sitting on the top of the stairs with Elly and Dess, waiting out the precious minutes until the photos while Asriel fixed his tie in the bathroom and Kris did… Kris things. Yule was half-convinced they’d be covered in spiders or mud within the hour, knowing what they got up to unsupervised. They were trying to listen to the adults while also watching Dess (badly) play through Enraged Parrots 2 on her phone, a dichotomy which made their head hurt as much as it entertained them. Dess still seemed tense, not saying more than a brief hi when Yule had sat down with Elly. Yule guessed it would take more than silence to resolve whatever was going on with her.

“So, Frisk, when are you going to bring your partner around? You said they interned for the California attorney general last time we caught up. If they’re still interested in the political space, I’d love to talk with them,” Mom was always trying to connect with “the right people”, which today apparently included whoever Frisk knew.

“I know, Aunt Carol! I’ve talked to them about coming back East, but they’re already on a packed schedule between my tours and their campaign work on the coast. I’ve told them that you’re the best shot we have of beating the bigwigs back in Boston at the next election, of course, but Cha…” They were interrupted by 3 sharp knocks at the door, which sent Noelle two feet into the air. Dess stifled a chuckle and started down the staircase, meaning that was probably the photographers. If it wouldn’t ruin the moment even worse than earlier, Yule would’ve been half tempted to step on the back of Dess’ dress, sending both careening down to the living room floor. Gray would’ve been a bad look on the cream floor, anyway. 

The kids shuffled out first, herded by Asgore and Frisk, while Toriel and Carol each carefully brought out a stack of papers to the waiting table set up in front of their flower garden, which Yule secretly lamented having to help set up the previous day. They began by taking the group photos, with Dess and Frisk centered and the younger siblings on either side, parents standing at the back. The contrast between the Dreemurrs and Holidays was obvious, the traditional suits contrasting heavily with the bright, festive colors Mom had picked for the family. They took a break from the group photos to get some individual shots, most of which just involved a person awkwardly standing in the center of the garden while being herded by the photographers into slightly different positions. The Holiday children got a few good shots of themselves with Dess in the center, but the real fun came when Asgore suggested the kids get their own photos. Initially, there was some order, with Frisk in the center, Dess and Asriel on the sides, and the younger kids arranged in a row below them, but it quickly broke down when Kris bet that everyone could fit on Frisk alone. That’s how they ended up precariously held in Frisk’s left arm, Kris on the right while the older kids propped Noelle up on Frisk’s head from their shoulders. The whole ordeal left Frisk out of breath and Rudy nearly passed out from laughter, so it was quickly decided to move onto the final act.

They did the signing then, each set of parents walked up and signed the documents. Yule was hoisted onto the table by their Dad, them and Kris signing the final line at the same time. 

“I told ya you’d be here for a while, Yuletide. I’m so proud to call you my child, we both are,” Rudy and Carol wrapped Yule in a tight hug, which was soon joined by Noelle, much to the amusement of Dess and Asriel, who were watching from the chairs. Yule and Kris were both tearing up (was that the first time they had seen Kris cry?). Azzy got up to join the hug while Noelle somehow tightened her grip even more, only making Yule cry harder.

“I… love you… Mom… and Dad… and Elly,” A loud sniff interrupted them before they could get to Dess, but Dad finished for them, shooting a look in her direction that Yule couldn’t interpret well. It took a few minutes, but their tears eventually slowed down, which signaled that it was time for the final shoot. They were arranged slightly differently this time, with Kris and Yule next to each other in the center and both families fanned out on either side of them. As the cameras flashed, Yule felt the same feeling they’d felt 2 years before, falling asleep in their family’s van. They went from the middle of the woods on a winter evening to taking photos with their siblings in beautiful matching dresses because of the kindness of the monsters around them. The thought seemed to reach their SOUL, or whatever equivalent they currently possessed. There was a brilliant warmth that felt as though it enwrapped their very being, a radiant light glowing in their chest. It wasn’t just the feeling of kindness this time, but a sense of completeness, as though they’d just found the last missing piece in an impossible puzzle. They smiled as wide as they could for the final photo, the flash of the camera causing their pupil to briefly expand against the emerald green of their irises. 

They were finally, after so long, at home.

Chapter Text

Yule gave thanks to the Angel for letting Dad cook today instead of Aunt Toriel, and for inspiring him to keep it classic. Last time they’d gotten together, their Aunt had insisted on making an “ancient human dish” she had found on the computer, which turned out to be a bunch of eel set into a mold of spiced jelly. They were the only ones not to be violently sick afterwards, which Toriel took as a sign that it was indeed a human favorite. As Dess and Azzy later found out, it was not uniquely human at all, but British, which explained the reaction. Instead of another dish of that caliber, they were having the signature Holiday Pasta Salad with chili and cornbread. Toriel had contributed the dessert instead of the main course, which made Yule’s mouth water. Dad said she’d chilled a piece of butterscotch pie just for them, which seemed much more appealing than the heap of pasta currently on their plate. Almost everyone else had finished eating, but Yule remained significantly further behind because of Kris, who had decided that the best use of the fake eyeballs they’d collected was hiding them in various locations in the bathroom while Yule tried to wash up for the meal. By the time all of the eyes had been collected, everyone else had already begun to eat.

It felt like time passed agonizingly slowly, the gentle conversation between the adults and older kids making Yule incredibly anxious. Would everyone be mad at them for taking so long, like Dess had been? The thought only made them eat slower, and soon Kris had gotten into a kicking competition with Asriel, which Dess put an end to when her attempt to salvage Azzy’s poor performance resulted in a spilt glass of wine and very flustered Uncle Asgore. Mom let out an annoyed scoff and stood up from her place at the head of the table.

“December, this type of behavior at the dinner table is unacceptable. You shouldn’t be playing these stupid games in the first place, but it's worse that you can’t recognize your own strength. Clean this up, now, then help your siblings take dirty dishes to the kitchen,” 

“Carol, it's fine, trust me. It's nothing a trip to the cleaners can’t fix, haha! Besides, kids will be kids. If anything, it's payback for every time Kris put mud in your fridge,” He chuckled again and looked to Toriel to back him up, but she wasn’t having any of it this time. Dinner was sacred, Asriel especially should know that.

“Don’t listen to him, Carol. My kids will help Dess clean it up, they were equally responsible for this mess,” She turned towards Kris, who was looking sheepishly at the red stain making its way across the tablecloth.  “I hope both of you learn to be more respectful when we are guests, my children,” 

“Look, I’m sorry, I’ll get it. Kris was just playing around, it was me who knocked over the wine glass,” Dess’ voice was low, barely a whisper, but it seemed enough for Carol, who asked Noelle and Yule to begin gathering up the various plates and utensils they needed to clean later into the night. Kris was more than satisfied with that assertion and ran off towards the living room, their horned headband nearly falling off as they dashed up the stairs. Yule hoped this wouldn’t mean another prank was imminent, but you could never really tell with Kris. Asriel, by contrast, stayed to help Dess, and it made Yule feel a bit better to see her genuinely smiling as he struggled to get a stain out of the white fur on his hand. This is what they wanted to see now, more than anything. Well, more than almost anything. By now, their dress began to feel cumbersome rather than pretty, and they could tell Noelle felt the same way. 

Just when the plates began to feel infinite, their guardian angel arrived, and Frisk promised to get the rest of the dishes done while they went and changed if they brought down Monopoly for everyone to play afterwards,  a deal which both kids happily accepted. Now, it was just a matter of getting past Kris. At first, the trek was shockingly peaceful, neither Yule nor Noelle tripping into a pile of mud or having buckets of water dumped over their heads. There was something off here.

Yule had quickly learned that Kris was incapable of stealth or quiet, especially when they were trying to pull off a prank, so this was highly unusual. For once, Elly agreed to take the lead, and they creeped towards their room, careful not to step anywhere they couldn’t verify as safe from a secret tripwire or mud pie. Eventually, Noelle worked up the courage to open the door to their room, the door creaking ever so slightly as both stared in abject horror at the pitch black before them.

Inside stood a figure who was obviously just Kris in one of Azzy’s old Halloween masks, done up slightly to look like a crude version of Jerry the Slasher. It wasn’t that mask that made Noelle scream, but the red heart in Kris’ hand, which was somehow glowing enough to illuminate the mask and part of Kris’ yellow and green attire (how had they gotten changed that fast?). Kris let out a cackle and ran at both of them, hands raised and heart still glowing. Yule figured that they’d just stop in front of them if they stood still, so simply crossed their arms and waited, but Kris kept getting closer, close enough to cause concern. They’d already been knocked down twice today, and weren’t particularly inclined to make that three, so ended up sidestepping at the last second, getting another shriek out of Noelle and sending Kris straight into the crude paintings of Santa each child had done the previous year at school, which hung on the otherwise plain wall adjacent to their room. 

The thud was more painful than usual, Kris falling back like a ragdoll while the heart flew across the hallway and landed on the top step of the stairs. It was a bit too much for Noelle, who burst out laughing.

“Krismas, where did you get one of Mom’s heart pillows? That was a good one, faha!” She laughed again and shut the door to their room, changing first while Yule went to take the mask from Kris. Maybe they could extract some extra pie from Kris if they ransomed it back. But, as they bent down to begin removing the mask, a weak yellow hand shot up and grabbed their forearm, causing a muffled yelp. 

“Heart… I need… the heart… please,” Their voice came in ragged breaths, their chest seeming to heave with the effort of getting any words out at all. It was disturbing because of how similar it was to Yule’s earliest memories. That was how they’d been when…before… the green started showing up in their eyes. After that first night, they’d begun to take on an increasingly normal appearance, green eyes with olive skin and blonde hair like Elly, which the doctor had said was normal for a SOUL which had to repair itself from scratch. As it’d grown, tasks had gotten easier, including speaking, but now it was like Kris was back to square one. They still looked the same physically, but seemed… diminished in some way. It was enough for Yule to yank the mask away and step back, which only seemed to make the problem worse.

If their breathing was strained before, it seemed even more spotty now. Even more concerning, their eyes were glazed over, staring intently upwards at something which wasn’t there. If this was another prank, Yule would never forgive the other human for it. They turned around to find the heart and hand it back to Kris as quickly as possible, only to see the “heart” gently floating back and forth between the wall and the stairs. That was the last straw, their resolve breaking as they burst in the door to their room, Elly done changing and browsing the computer before she was forced into another terribly boring game of Monopoly where Yule or Azzy always won.

“Elly… please… get Frisk… ignore… the heart… just a prank,” They nearly fell over their dress again and braced themself on the wardrobe, about to reach for the short red and green hoodie they’d worn almost every day since they’d been taken in. 

“Um… okay. Just don’t take too long, I need backup if I’m dealing with Kris, faha!” She left the room and, as expected, screamed at the sight of the heart. It wasn’t pleasant for either of them to have to do this, but Yule couldn’t handle any more insane SOUL shenanigans without having a panic attack, which would probably only make whatever Kris did worse. They knew there was some weird human stuff on the internet, but they had no idea what their Dreemurr counterpart had searched to actually learn to do whatever that was. They tried to concentrate on getting the dress off, the fabric now feeling more suffocating every minute that went by. They only hoped that this wouldn’t make anyone too mad, or hurt Kris. The thought almost made them shed a tear.

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Dess felt like she was going bald just from listening to the adult’s so-called “conversation”. Since Frisk went to “help Yule with human stuff”, her and Asriel had been the replacement, which meant she now had to sit for an unspecified period being asked humiliating questions instead of watching Blood Crushers with Azzy. She was thankful Yule and Noelle were still too young to care about that sort of thing, or she would’ve lost her mind long before this. Being alone with Azzy (and sometimes Kris, if they were in a good mood) was what she waited for today, not Aunt Toriel commenting on her hair (so what if she had cut it shoulder length, she still shouldn’t keep it so wild!) and Dad laughing at her “dark arts phase” in reference to her recent room makeover. It just made sitting down worse, knowing that no one but Azzy and Kris actually took anything she did seriously. She thought she’d made them listen before, but it was clear now it was just a front. Anything to keep the mayor’s image intact, right? She went back to her phone in hopes to read a bit more news on the next generations of MREs, a topic she often resorted to when looking too interested would get her caught. She was always fascinated by this type of stuff (Azzy had enough paintball stains on his fur to speak to that), but her mother had been increasingly concerned about it when she began to ask about the military. That was a red line she would never allow her children to cross, no matter the circumstances. 

“So, are you two excited for the trip next month? I hear it's going to be lots of fun, especially since your Aunt planned it, faha!” Both kids perked up at the mention of the school trip to Boston, something new that the school had planned as part of the American history curriculum. Dess, for one, was ecstatic. An entire day in the biggest city in the state with just her and Azzy (and Bratty, and most likely Pizzapants, but that wasn’t important) was like a dream come true to her. She could be whoever she wanted and do whatever she pleased in the city, no one to tell her to live up to Mom’s expectations anymore. She dreamed of the day that she could do it for real. 

“For sure, Uncle Rudy! We’re both super excited to see all of the history, aren’t we, Dess?” Asriel was being more diplomatic than he usually was around her family, but she figured that was because of her earlier outburst. Whatever, Yule would get over it eventually. That kid would still love a cactus if they had to sleep with it every night (she’d have to suggest that particular prank to Kris next time they stayed over at the Dreemurr house). Dess nodded and silently hoped Frisk would hurry up. It felt like it had been hours since they’d awkwardly excused themself and followed Elly up the stairs, disappearing behind the wall to a muffled groan and squeal from Noelle. Whatever had happened with Kris, it seemed at least a bit serious, so Dess could forgive some delay, but this was getting ridiculous. 

Upstairs, Frisk slammed into the Santa drawings while trying to wrangle the red SOUL, nearly tripping over Kris, who was now shaking and faintly complaining of the cold. It wasn’t moving in any coherent pattern, which was good, but it was floating around, which made it incredibly hard to catch, especially since whatever it was made of turned out to be slippery. How had this kid figured out how to do this on their own? They’d heard of similar things being possible in the most dire circumstances or by extreme force, but never just to prank a couple of other children, if what Noelle had told them was true. It was, to say the least, extremely concerning, but what was worse is that Kris seemingly had no idea what would happen once the SOUL was actually removed. They weren’t instantly dead, which was a miracle by itself, but they were rapidly progressing towards it, which made the SOUL’s floating even more of a problem. 

Just as they were about to grasp the heart with both hands, it sank a few inches, meaning Frisk instead nearly tripped over Kris’ leg and left the heart where it was, prompting an even louder groan from Kris. This was getting dicey faster than they would’ve liked, but it was better than letting any of the monsters downstairs see the issue. From what Toriel had told them, Yule was already enough of an anomaly to cause a stir in both the family and human medical system, which would make Kris even worse, considering they were otherwise completely average medically. Thankfully, Yule emerged from their room at just the right time to leap onto the red SOUL, twisting around it and landing with it firmly in their jacket pocket. It was better than their attempts, they had to admit.

“Damn kid, you should be doing hurdles with that dexterity. You should talk to Asriel about that later,” Yule shot them a look which Frisk could only interpret as fury, which seemed understandable given the situation.

“Tell me… how to save…. them…. please…” Yule gestured to the pocket, now glowing red. They were crying, which Frisk took as a sign to hurry it up. Wow, they did not expect this level of reaction for Kris of all people. They were really glad Toriel wasn’t seeing this now.

“Umm okay, I’ve never seen something like this before, but I know that the SOUL resides in our chest, near the actual heart. Just, try to put it back in, I guess. There’s really nothing else I can think of, especially since we have no idea how Kris got it out in the first place,” There wasn’t a minute of hesitation before Yule gripped the soul and, with a faint green glow, shoved it into Kris’ sweater. Frisk was honestly expecting it to just knock the wind out of Kris and probably send the SOUL flying again, but instead it slowly sank through Kris’ sweater, seemingly back into their chest. Both let out a massive sigh of relief as Kris’ breathing slowly went back to normal, the heart finally vanishing beneath the sweater and the green glow in Yule’s hand dimming. They were going to need to have a long talk with Kris about this before they could get back downstairs.

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By the time Frisk came downstairs giving Kris a piggyback ride, Azzy had fallen asleep, and Dess was several minutes deep into a video on weaponry of the First Monster-Human War. It wasn’t great, but it was free, so it sufficed while the adults continued to talk about local politics and the school board. 

“So, sorry to say, but I don’t think any of these guys are gonna make it through Monopoly,” They gestured to Yule and Noelle, changed and letting out long exaggerated yawns. It was obviously just a way to get out of the game, but Dess didn’t mind that at all. 

“Well, shoot, that was just what I was hoping to do right now. Since Azzy’s asleep, why don’t I go change and uhhh… set up an air mattress for him!” That got a suspicious look from Mom and Toriel alike, but ultimately no one reached out to stop her. Both unsurprising and fine with her. She could finally get out of this horrible dress. 

The top of the stairs looked a bit more dilapidated than usual, but that seemed like a given as a result of whatever game or trick Frisk had been teaching Kris considering the amount of bangs and pained moans which had come from the hallway. Toriel was seconds from going upstairs before Carol grabbed her attention again with a story about the governor’s proposed education reform (which she had some very strong opinions on), which Dess was doubly grateful for. If she had stopped whatever scheme was going on, it would’ve meant Monopoly, and then she’d have been trapped for hours. Yule and Asriel were both freakishly good, and games often boiled down to them duking it out while everyone else was slowly bled dry. Some fun that was.

She was so eager to get the dress into the ever-growing pile of unused objects in the corner of her room that she failed to notice the small pink cup which sat perched between her door and the frame, which then fell directly onto her horn. At first, she assumed it was just some prank Kris hadn’t had time to finish and shut the door, but then she felt something small crawl down her antler. 

What. The. Fuck. 

She carefully reached up and pulled the cup off, her eyes blinking rapidly as dozens of tiny dots entered her field of vision. That couldn’t be what she thought it was, right? Voice quavering, she managed out a stuttered “you fucker,” before her fears were confirmed. Inside the cup were two or three yellow-white sacs, each ruptured when the cup had landed. Kris hadn’t been lying about the spiders, had they? They were gonna be so dead after…. 

Dess’ antler cracked on the corner of her desk as she fainted, the spiderlings spreading out in the dark of her room.

Downstairs, Rudy had (much to Carol’s chagrin) given the kids permission to have 1 last piece of pie for the night, which meant they were all gathered around the dinner table listening to Frisk and Asriel recite their own versions of how the “God of Hyperdeath” lost to Frisk’s level 1 human child named “Tom Aubergine”, which had everyone but Asriel in tears by the end. He’d never live it down now. 

By the end of the tale (and the pie by extension), Yule was feeling ready to pass out, but Dess still hadn’t returned. They were tentatively waiting on her to get back to decide what to do next, but Kris was getting impatient and beginning to initiate the kicking game again, this time with Noelle. She was timid when it came to Kris’ physical attacks for the most part, but this time there was no Dess to take her allowance in exchange for hitting Kris with her bat, so she became a little more reactive, giving Kris a good few bruises before they realized there was no use competing with a deer monster when it came to kicking. That seemed to be enough for Frisk, who abruptly decided that they would teach Kris the piano until Dess came back downstairs. They sat down at the stark white bench and plopped Kris down next to them, both tentatively tapping the ivory keys to make sure the piano was still tuned correctly. 

“Since there’s only one song here, let's just start with that, okay?” Frisk gently lifted the sheet off of the piano, reading carefully and raising their eyebrows.

“Hey Azzy, who wrote this? It's not something I’m familiar with, I don’t think, though the melody sounds familiar,” Asriel walked over and struggled to read the text, flipping it over to reveal lyrics hastily scrawled on the back. This was definitely by Dess.

“I think it's one of Dess’ projects she worked on with Mr.Boom before he passed. It might be a nice surprise to perform it for her, if I could grab Dad’s old camcorder,” He thought for a second, then left the room, presumably to find out where the thing had ended up (Asgore inevitably brought it every year “just in case”, though no one was sure if it’d been used at all in at least 5 years). Yule came over to examine the lyrics with Frisk, seeing a note hastily scrawled at the top. “For the people who keep me sane” was circled next to two figures who were about as badly drawn as any attempt Yule made, which meant they were near impossible to make out. This had to be them and Elly, didn’t it? 

“Elly… this is… for us… isn’t it?” They thought the question out loud, prompting Noelle to come over and quickly nod her head. Frisk and Kris both looked unsure, but it didn’t really matter to Yule at this point. Dess did really care, didn’t she? They had to perform this now. Asriel came back with an extremely bulky black camera. It looked like one of the old cameras from a horror movie, with a giant gray bay to insert and record VHS tapes and a lens the size of Yule’s palm. It was a relic, but Asgore had somehow managed to find empty tapes for it, so Asriel quickly set it up on the kitchen table, just far back enough to capture the entire piano and those standing next to it.

“Can we… sing… Azzy? There’s words…. On the back..” Asriel looked surprised for a second, but quickly nodded his head.

“I already sing in the choir, so I can lead you and Elly if you want! It’ll be fun,” Noelle would never pass up a chance to sing, especially with Asriel, so she was quick to agree, meaning they would be a trio while Kris did a duet with Frisk on the piano. Asriel dashed to grab a pen and paper to rewrite the lyrics for them to reference, then had Noelle and Yule practice for a minute while he fiddled with the camera to make sure it worked. Finally, after a few more minutes of practice, they were ready. 

“Ahem, is everyone ready? Alright December, this is from all of us here, but mostly the two you dedicated this to, Noelle and Yule. Kris, hit it!” Frisk let out a chuckle as the keys to the piano began to move, slowly but surely. The melody was soft, a sprinkling of notes that echoed through the house as the three began to sing.

When.. the… light is running low

And the shadows start to grow

And the places that you know

Seem like fantasy

It wasn’t perfect, certainly, but the way that Asriel and Noelle harmonized gave Yule the confidence they needed to sing along, at least maintaining enough consistency that they could tell their voice added something to the melody. It made their heart swell.

There’s a

Light inside your soul

That’s still shining in the cold

With the truth

The promise in our hearts

On the top step of the staircase, December, now with a torn dress and hundreds of dead spiderlings strewn about her fur, heard the muffled voices and stared down in abject horror. That was HER song. The one SHE wrote for Asriel. The last one she ever wrote with Mr.Boom. Her tongue got caught in her throat and she felt a rising tide of fury and despair. Her hands, balled into fists, began to shake as the music continued. 

Don’t Forget

We’re with you in the dark

There was a short bout of clapping before Dess could faintly hear her siblings… thanking her? For writing a song about them. About them. That was the last thing December could make out before she slammed the door to her room as hard as she could, the frame rattling on its hinges as she crushed the cup that had once contained the spiderlings with her hoof. 

How could they? How DARE they? That was HER confession to give, HER soul to lay bare. She’d spent hours pouring over the composition, days planning how she was going to play it for Asriel tonight, how she was going to give a recording to Father Alvin afterwards. Now, what did she have? They’d covered her in fucking SPIDERS and left her to ROT while THEY took her love, her BEING, for themselves. She realized at that moment that the song could never actually be about Asriel and Mr.Boom now. Even suggesting so would be an unspeakable evil to her parents that would damage her oh-so-precious siblings forever. 

The thought of Mr.Boom never getting her tribute was near-overwhelming, her hand wrapping around the cracked antler which sat slightly lopsided on the left side of her head, poking out of the black mop, but it was something else that did her in. He would’ve agreed with them, wouldn’t he? He was always too good to understand why she needed this, too decent to even think of getting angry over a trivial thing like this. Crack

A white-hot flash  of pain blinded her for a moment, but she barely registered it. Azzy would say the same thing too, wouldn’t he. He was smart enough to figure out it was for him, so clearly that was what he already thought. He didn’t need some romantic gesture or song from her, did he? He was too generous to ever let a fuck-up like her make the moves, too excellent to ever consider why she would need something as stupid as a little song to tell him how she felt. Crack

Another flash, worse this time, but even less impactful. Her sobs were just barely drowned out by the piano downstairs. Of course, Yule and Elly would never understand why she wouldn’t write a song just for them. They were the golden children, weren’t they? They were too focused to ever consider what December wanted, too loved to ever relate to what it felt like to write that song. What it felt like to want to reach out so badly to the two people in your world who aren’t just blocks of ice in a kingdom of snow, cold and unconcerned with you at every turn. They wanted the song to be about them, so they took it, and now it too was ice, melting away from her grasp like the morning snow. Dess didn’t deserve anything they didn’t give her. Crack

She almost doubled-over, but the sound of laughing was enough to keep her upright. Not even herself really understood why this hurt so much. Maybe she was just being naive, maybe dramatic. She was going to play the song with Kris anyway, and everyone else would’ve been there to watch. But still, it would’ve been HER song, and now it was nothing to her but notes on a page. It was a page of notes she would never play again because they would never mean anything to her anymore. She honestly didn’t know what to expect. December Holiday never got to put her name, make her mark, be included in anything before, so why would that change now? Crack

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The top three-quarters of her antler sat in her hands, covered in tears and scratches dug by her fingernails. She’d been sitting like that for almost an hour, unsure of how to even begin to tell her parents what had happened or fix her now devastated room. In addition to her dress being in tatters and the hundreds of spiderlings which had inevitably escaped her initial purge, much of her discarded pile of junk was strewn across the room, multiple of her MRE rations now boasting huge dents from her hooves. She’d get through it eventually, she did the last time. She let herself sit for another 10 minutes before she heard a soft knock at the door. 

“Hey Dess, it's Azzy and Kris. Yule and Noelle went to bed a while ago, but we’ve just been up talking with Frisk and your parents. We hadn’t heard from you in a while, so we wanted to check on you, if you’re awake?” Asriel always had a way of making his intentions seem as noble as possible, which Dess supposed they were here, to an extent. She quickly draped her camo jacket over her shoulders to cover up the mess that had become of her dress, and reluctantly went to crack open the door. She sniffed hard before she could speak

“Hi, Azzy. I’m sorry I wasn’t down earlier, I uh… well… to be honest… I slipped,” She could tell that it was a terrible lie, but at least it wasn’t entirely untrue. Azzy’s eyes went wide when he saw her. She looked like she’d been hit by a truck, her eyes red and fur stained with tears while she held one of her antlers in her hand. There was no way a fall could’ve caused this, but he gave her the benefit of the doubt.

“How did you lose an antler? Your parents are going to be super worried about it, you know,” She let Kris and Asriel into her room and picked up her guitar, trying to act like the space wasn’t in complete disarray. Playing helped her to destress, and she could use that now more than ever. 

“I accidentally let Kris’ spiders out, and well, I had to do… this,” She gestured around the room, “to even begin to find all of them. One crawled onto my head and, well, I fainted and hit my head on my desk. I woke up like this, so I guess I hit it at the wrong angle. It sucks but I’m fine, I think,” She ran her hands through her hair and strummed slightly, Kris sitting next to them to listen in on whatever she decided to play. 

“Alright, if you’re sure. Remember, you can tell me whatever. I’m here for you, Dess,” He put his hand on her shoulder and pushed, propelling himself onto the bed behind Dess, getting a chuckle out of both of them. 

“Some comfort you’re giving me, huh goat boy. Alright, Krismas, I’ll play you a classic. Hopefully you can play it for me one day when I’m out there in the wide world.” She chuckled again and began to strum Hey There Delilah, Asriel singing along from behind her. She missed this, she really did, but she knew it couldn’t last. She needed something more to take her mind off the creeping feeling that nothing had really changed. She was beyond relieved when Asriel got up to use the bathroom once she had finished the song, and left the bed to search her desk drawer for something specific. It had been too long since she’d played, but she knew Asriel would stop her if he saw. She finally found it, extracting an old pocket knife from the drawer and flicking it open.

“Hey, Krismas, you ever heard of the Knife Game?”

Chapter Text

Detective Harmen closed the hospital door behind them. Yule started screaming again.

 The lights were on, then off, then on, then off, over and over again. There was The Angel, there was Kris, there was…. Someone in the distance shouted, the same words echoing like a chorus of voices. It wasn’t true, that wasn’t what happened, it couldn’t be. 

It was dark again. A quiet hum filled the room, then the slamming of a cold, heavy, metal door. No, that wasn’t real. They knew it wasn’t real, it didn’t happen, they never had a friend like that. They hadn’t seen… 

They were cut off by a flash of red, so bright they thought they’d been blinded. Red in the air, red on the snow, black on her, a pain in their side that felt like fire. An echoing laugh and the soft sound of its calliope. Could they hear it still? 

The sides of their vision were tainted with it, the music creeping, writhing up the sides of their face. It wouldn’t stop, not ever, she’d told them so. The yellow lock, they told her, wasn't right. None of this was right, none of this was okay, not with… 

They felt a slight pain in the arm, and the world relaxed. Their eyes focused on the white tile ceiling, quiet for the first time in hours. 

Oh Angel, it was one of these. There weren’t a lot of days when Detective Harmen wished they had just become a lawyer, but ones in which they had to try to extract any useful information from a traumatized child were certainly some of the most notable. Unfortunately for them, Hometown was small enough of a suburb not to have detectives of its own, so they had to be called in special for whatever had happened here. The story they kept getting was confusing and suspect, to say the least. They looked down at their notes to review more while the adrenaline took effect. These doctors hadn’t known the first thing about calming down a human, much less one who was constantly screaming, which had made the whole situation much harder for them. Beats sitting behind a desk all day, doesn’t it?

The timeline they could piece together so far was relatively simple, luckily, but that was also more due to a lack of witnesses than a cut and dry situation.

December 24th, 2014 

4:30pm: The Dreemurr Family arrives at the Holiday residence for Christmas Eve. This is a traditional practice for both families, and nothing appears to be out of the ordinary.

7:30pm: After games and a meal, the families split up into various groups. Asriel Dreemurr and December Holiday leave the gathering to play the new Dragon Blazers, which she has unwrapped early. All 3 younger children leave to the front yard to build a snowmonster.

8:00pm: Krismas Dreemurr, the younger child of that family, gets into some kind of altercation with Noelle Holiday, one of the two younger children outside with them. Noelle claims that Kris had tried to prank her by dressing up as “the monster of the shelter”* and jumping out of the snow, which made Noelle begin to cry. According to her, Yule Holiday, trying to dissuade Kris, takes their horned headband and makes fun of their height, which then causes Kris to stomp inside and attempt to retrieve December.

*According to testimony by both Noelle Holiday and Asriel Dreemurr, December, and Kris by extension, had been increasingly interested in the shelter and its limited history in the weeks prior to Christmas. Should investigate this link more if possible.

8:30pm: Asriel Dreemurr states that he and December pause halfway through the game’s ice section in order to retrieve Kris’ headband, which they are inconsolable without. December is supposedly quite angry about this and whispers something to Kris which Asriel could not make out.

8:45pm: All of the children are outside, some kind of agreement having been reached between December and Yule over the horned headband. Noelle appears to blame herself for the altercation and becomes distraught, which drives both her and Asriel to go back inside early for comfort. Yule stomps in first after them, muttering about speaking to their mother, Carol Holiday, about Dess’ conduct to “stop her stupid games”. Asriel notes a large bruise on their upper left forearm which is consistent with injuries sustained after previous altercations with Dess.* December enters soon after carrying Kris on her shoulders.

*This may be worth examining further considering the unusual circumstances surrounding Yule’s wounds and Kris’ SOUL. Could Dess have been fed up with them? I certainly would be if they’re anything like Mayor Holiday.

9:30pm: All of the children are sent to sleep upstairs by Carol Holiday, who did not respond to Yule’s complaints other than to yell at Dess to stop. According to both witnesses, everyone initially goes to sleep as normal, except for Kris, who asks to sleep in Dess’ room since “Noelle and Yule stay up whispering to each other”. Neither witness believes the statement, but Dess agrees. Asriel expresses slight annoyance at this, but refused to say why*.

*I could investigate this, but I feel like Mayor Holiday may not enjoy the answers I find.

10:30pm: Noelle wakes up briefly and thinks she hears Yule leaving the room. Believing it to just be them using the bathroom, she falls back asleep. A few minutes before, Asriel wakes up to see Dess grabbing her wiffle bat and pepper spray from the closet, which leads them to have a short argument. Dess says that Kris is scared of a monster and she’s going to show them that it's nothing, which Asriel calls out as a lie. Dess tells him that it doesn’t matter, and that she’ll be back in a minute anyway. The witness claims that he was groggy and unable to recall more of the conversation before he fell back asleep. Should press further if need arises.

December 25th, 2014

7:30am: Asriel goes into the younger holiday siblings’ room to check if they know where Dess and Kris are. Noelle claims that Asriel entered in a state of panic and told her to grab her parents while he searches the rest of the upstairs for the three missing. He claims later that he became concerned when Dess didn’t text him back that morning, and began to lose composure when he found Yule also missing. 

8:30am: Asgore goes to gather the rest of the police to search the local area while Carol, Asriel, Toriel, and Rudy take Noelle to search around the Holiday residence. Noelle is the first to suggest the shelter, with Asriel and Rudy taking her to go to investigate the shelter while Toriel and Carol continue to search around the residence. 

9:00am: Upon arriving at the shelter, all 3 witnesses describe a similar situation. The doors leading inside, which had both been locked for decades, were wide open, with the left being bent and nearly ripped off its hinges while the right remained mostly intact. December was nowhere to be seen, and initial callings into the shelter returned silence. All 3 also described a sense of extreme dread when examining the shelter itself, which is supposedly a common phenomenon associated with the site. A few feet away from the doors, the knife Kris regularly took from the Dreemurr kitchen was laying in the grass, testing revealing blood consistent with Yule Holiday’s coating it along with an unknown black substance which dissipated soon after laboratory contact (look further? Await testimony). Kris themself was splayed out in front of the left door, apparently comatose and lacking a SOUL. Though they should, by all rights, be dead, they remain in a stable, though unresponsive, state*. Yule was found several feet in front of the doors, SOUL intact (they have one now??? Question Mayor Holiday later) but with a significant wound to their side and several smaller cuts and bruises. 

*Of course they’d be, why would anyone ever follow the laws of biology! I can’t believe this has somehow come up twice with the same pair. Need to run tests on whichever one of them we can convince to go through with it.

The department had called in Detective Harmen at that point, so they were personally present for most of what had happened after their notes ended. Asgore and his deputies searched the shelter and found nothing but rusted and more locked doors with no sign of entry and unknown codes. 

The rest of Hometown had been searched extensively, with parties from here to Ebbot City and back finding no trace of the missing Holiday. From all accounts, Dess had somehow managed to blast open the shelter’s heavy metal doors and then vanished from the face of the Earth. Not even a trace of her DNA could be found in the shelter or the areas around it, which meant that she had probably not even touched the inside of the shelter before whatever happened. Now, though. Yule was awake and hopefully coherent, which meant they could shed some light on what had actually happened before Mayor Holiday and Mrs.Dreemurr began to fight each other in the hospital waiting room. Tension had been running high before they’d arrived, but it seemed as though everyone in town wanted to simultaneously kill them personally and throttle every other adult in the room at once. Quite an unfavorable environment to work in when your only leads are two kids who’ve been comatose or screaming nonstop for the last few days. At least they were getting somewhere now. 

They got up from the uncomfortable and rather stuffy hospital chair and moved to grasp Yule’s hand, only to find that it was much further down the bed than they’d expected. Damn, the kid was getting tall. Most humans since the 2nd War only got about as tall as Yule was now as young adults, which was curious. They guessed it wasn’t too curious, though, considering how much they took after the Holidays in every other way. Their hair was a deeper blond than Carol’s, closer to Noelle’s, and hung just past their shoulders. As messy as it had been back in the day, it seemed. It was difficult to tell with the bandages and hospital equipment, but they had a soft almond or darker olive tone which apparently closely matched Dess’ fur. Probably not a coincidence, they guessed, since last time they’d met Yule was completely gray. After another minute of looking at their wounds and general demeanor, they were met with a pair of piercing green eyes, which had gone wide with shock.

“Where is this, where is Dess? Kris, they.. The shelter…” They finally seemed to recognize the detective standing in front of them. Brown hair with streaks of gray tied back in a short ponytail, an old hat over top and a long tan trench coat, oddly familiar. 

“Who are you? Did you take me here?” Their voice got a bit more shaky, the reality of the situation seemingly beginning to override any logical impulse they might’ve had. It was time to step in, Cal surmised. 

“Hey kiddo, I’m Detective Cal Harmen. I believe we’ve met before, but you might not remember it, considering the time and place,” They tried to place a gloved hand on the side of the hospital bed to try and seem sincere, but it only made Yule flinch a little. Noted.

“You’re the one who talked to me after Mom found me in the woods, aren’t you? It's fuzzy, but I remember the coat,” This comment got a chuckle out of the Detective, which both took as a good sign. At least they were in good enough shape to speak about things from years ago. That boded well for the questioning to come.

“You’re a lot more talkative than the last time I met you, kid. I’m impressed. Care to use that to help me out a bit,” They hoped having Yule take the lead would make them divulge information easier, if they had any reason to hide it. Couldn’t be too careful in a sensitive situation. 

“I just… I don't know what’s going on. I keep having this horrible nightmare about Dess and Kris, and that shelter. Am I sick? Is Elly okay?” They were starting to panic again as more short glimpses of the nightmare crept into their mind. Just keep talking, like Mom and Aunt Toriel said. It would go away if they kept their attention on talking.

“Okay, I can see how this might be a bit stressful for you. How about I catch you up to speed and you tell me what you remember after?” They tried to keep a positive tone, but felt it slip at the end of their sentence. Damnit, Cal, at least try to keep composure in front of a witness for once. Yule nodded and weakly smiled, which meant they either didn’t notice or didn’t care, which was a relief. 

“Well, from what your sister tells me, you snuck out on Christmas Eve, with Krismas and December. We think that you three tried to go into the shelter on the edge of town, but, um, you got hurt outside. We found you and Kris laying down around that area, both out cold. You’ve been laying here for about 3 days, we couldn’t get through to you until we figured out how to shock you awake, no thanks to the doctors here. That’s a short version, we were hoping you could help us fill in some of those gaps to get a better idea of what happened,” They gestured to the IV machine, used to provide nutrients while Yule was unresponsive or unable to eat, as they spoke. Yule’s eyes were wide with fear when the Detective finished speaking, flashes of bright green darting around the room to avoid eye contact. Well, at least Cal knew something was definitely wrong here, beyond the obvious. The hard part was getting it onto the record. 

“Hey, it's okay, just take your time and try to stay calm. You’re safe here with me. If you can’t remember anything, I understand, but if you can, you could really help your older sister out. She’s… lost right now, and we’re trying to find out where she could be,” That was about as light as they could’ve let Yule down in regards to December, so it was a relief when they began to talk again. Like the Lieutenant said, sometimes you just need to have faith in your witness, or pretend to for the sake of the investigation. 

“I… don’t remember a lot of it. We were all outside and Kris started teasing Elly about that shelter on the edge of town. I thought it was funny at first, but they started to say weird things about Mom and some monster that was out to get us. I kept telling them to stop but, they just wouldn’t, and I said something to them I shouldn’t have,” They started to sniffle, a memory of holding Kris’ horns over their head flashing across their mind’s eye. Maybe if they’d just let Kris tease… 

“It wasn’t nice, and it made Kris really mad. I’ve never really seen them get that angry before. I kept playing with Elly, but they went inside to get Dess and Azzy. Dess came back with them and took Kris’ horns from me, then grabbed my arm and threw me back into our snowmonster. We fight a lot, but never usually like that. I was still so mad that I tried to tell Mom, but she just said she was busy talking with Aunt Toriel and to grab some ice from the kitchen. She’s been doing that a lot lately. After that it was normal for a while, but something was off with Dess. She kept looking off into space and whispering something to Kris. I thought that maybe I could get Mom to punish her if I caught her sneaking out, so I waited up after we went to bed,” Yule stopped and grimaced, face contorting with a mix of apprehension and confusion. 

“Hey, don’t worry about taking too long. You’ve already helped us out a lot, alright? Before you move on, I wanted to ask a question, if that’s okay,” Yule gave a weak nod, upper lip trembling. 

“You mentioned before that you thought Dess might sneak out. Why is that? Has she done this kind of thing before?” This could at least explain why she would go out so late, or how she did it so well. The mayor didn’t want to admit it, but there was definitely a deeper problem here than just a curious teenager trying to rebel against authority.

“I’m not really supposed to talk about this with anybody, but Mom would want me to now, I think. A couple years ago, Dess was out all night, and didn’t get home until the morning. No one told me or Elly where she went, and she never talks about it. Maybe that could help, but I don’t know much else,” Their voice slurred slightly as they finished speaking, the last words almost fully blending together. They hadn’t had trouble talking for years now, had they? They felt more tired than they’d ever been, eyelids drooping as Detective Harmen finished writing down what they had said. 

“I’m glad you felt comfortable enough to tell me that. It’ll definitely help us find her, trust me. Now, if it isn’t too much to ask, could you tell me the rest of what you remember,” This was the moment of truth, or so Cal hoped. If Yule couldn’t provide actual information about what had happened at the shelter, they’d be basically back to square one apart from knowing that Dess had left the house before. 

“It's… her. I remember hearing her late at night, following her and Kris out of the back door. I don’t remember what time she left the house, but I know I wanted to follow her to catch her doing… something. I’m not sure when, but she heard me following at one point, and hit me with her bat. It wasn’t hard, but I started crying, and she… brought me with her. I… she… got to the shelter and did something with the door. I can’t remember what but, I know there was a red flash, and Kris fell back for a second. The shelter, the door opened, and… black… so much black… someone screamed… I got up..” They paused to take a breath, eyes beginning to look straight past the Detective and towards something neither of them could see. 

“It was so, so dark. Dess was shouting at something in the shelter, but I didn’t see what it was at first. There was a red glow, stronger than the dark, that swallowed the shelter door. Kris made some noise, it was a terrible screech, like an owl mixed with nails on a chalkboard. Someone laughed, then I felt something hit me in the side. It hurt so much, I felt my SOUL light up, and then… The Angel. The Angel… I saw it… gave me…. connection…” The heart monitor nearly drowned out Yule’s last words, the human’s vitals nearly giving Cal a heart attack of equal proportions. Whatever had happened there had sent them right back to where they’d been when Cal walked in, minus the screaming. They needed a doctor, now.

The sound of boots thundering across the floor was enough for Mayor Holiday, who was still quietly arguing with Toriel, to turn and follow as Detective Harmen burst into the waiting room, heading straight to the receptionist, who stared in bewilderment. 

“Doctor… We need a Doctor in room one… signs of a seizure,” They barely managed to get the sentence out before they felt an icy touch on their left shoulder. Great, another conversation with the mayor. 

“Detective, what did you do to my child? I already told you not to try anything until their… condition… improved, and now it seems that you’ve made it worse. I’m sure your supervisors back in Ebbot City will be very interested to see how that happened,”  Her voice was sharp and cold, as usual, but frayed, probably a reflection of her hours of shouting at various officials and townsfolk. This wasn’t the first time a victim’s family had been angry at Cal, but it was the first time that family had been in charge of the entire town. 

“Mayor Holiday, I can assure you I did nothing that wasn’t completely within my jurisdiction as a detective working this case. Yule had suffered another episode, and the doctors tried a new treatment. They were able to give several minutes of possibly critical testimony before relapsing, which is what I was here for this whole time. Once again, I’m incredibly sorry for this situation, but there’s nothing I can do until I’m able to piece together a clear story about what happened,” The mayor shot back an icy glare and prepared to retort, but the doctor, leaving Yule’s room, beat her to it, yelping as the beep of one heart monitor replaced another. Kris, of course, had decided to follow Yule’s lead.

Chapter Text

Morning came not with a ray of exuberant sunshine or the chirping of a loving starling, but the harsh and low voice of Mayor Carol Holiday yelling through the phone, probably at Uncle Asgore again.Yule shifted in their bed, covering their head with a thick green comforter as they attempted to drown out the noise. It had been like this the last 5 times they’d tried to sleep too, and they were never successful. 

The first time, they slammed the door in Elly’s face, the hinges almost breaking as they threw one of their tennis trophies into the framed photo of a partridge Dess had given them for their birthday last year. She was always happiest out birdwatching with Azzy, but they’d taken that away too. The trophy made a loud thud as it hit, making a small crack in the glass where the bird’s eye sat, and landed uselessly on the top of  Yule’s desk. Of course it was plastic, like most of their life, so it didn’t make much of a real impact on the photo. 

They felt ice cold, fingers curled so tight that they left marks on their palm. As they climbed the ladder to their bed, they launched their copy of Island of the Blue Dolphins from their pillow into the dark cavity under the TV stand which served as the tomb for everything from Kris’ leftover prank material to old wood engravings of the Holidays circa 2010. Not things they’d particularly want to remember, especially not now. Aunt Toriel would give them an extension anyway, after everything. Even if she hated Mom now, she couldn’t be mad at them. 

They’d told her it wasn’t Kris over and over for a good reason. They had realized a long time ago that it was always better to be in Toriel’s good graces at school than not, which had led to more than a few awkward afternoons helping her prepare work with Elly and one pie-baking session with Kris which went in the mental equivalent of the darkest corner of the TV stand. 

They groaned terribly, the memories of Dess overtaking any image of school they tried to conjure. They went limp on the cerulean bedspread, hands starting to shake as they stared at the discarded on one of the couch cushions. That was why they’d begged their parents for a bigger TV, wasn’t it? So they could see the screen when she played…. 

The second time wasn’t much better. They had been curled on one side of the bed for hours, all of the pain and fear of what had happened finally catching up with them when they heard Dad playing Clair De Lune on the family piano. That was the song, the one Dess played for Kris to teach them basic composition. They began to shake harder than they had before, the sobbing only getting more intense as memories of that night began to overtake any reasonable thought they could muster.

 But, as much as Yule wanted it, begged for it, no tears fell. That night, Dess had finally found it, the thing something had crawled out of years before. Dess said it’d taken weeks of research to figure out the code, the late autumn rain chilling them to the bone and sending Kris down into the mud more than a handful of times. But she’d found it nonetheless,or so she thought. She couldn’t get it off, her hooves beating against the wall again and again. 

Kris did it in the end, releasing the thing that glowed like the most brilliant opal in the moonlight. It spun like electrons in an atom, the pulse drawing them in with a perfect warmth. Dess murmured that she needed it again, needed to stop everything that was happening before it was too late. She’d wanted to keep Yule and Elly safe from it, all of it, before it could come to them. That’s why she got so angry, why… A sharp pain hit Yule in the gut, where the bandage remained wrapped. If a lack of sleep wasn’t enough to kill them, the phantom pain would be. 

Dess said she’d seen some papers, documents Mom had left out on the kitchen table after  a meeting at city hall. Yule didn’t know if they believed her at first, but when The Angel showed them their Connection, all of their doubts melted away like the ice in the gentle morning heat. It’d picked them up as gingerly as Dess picked up Kris earlier that night, and in that moment he saw not the creeping darkness which spread across the landscape, but its eyes, which revealed the world, a better world. 

When they went to look again, though, they couldn’t see the woman’s face the Angel had shown them, or even her hands, a gentle peach with vibrant pastel colors on her nails calling to mind the first rainbow during a rainy spring afternoon. Instead, they saw a deep, swirling darkness, and two swollen red orbs which looked profoundly hungry. They remembered that more than anything else, how much it reminded them of a starving animal. There was no hate when it threw Yule aside and dragged her into the darkness of the shelter, just a profound, gnawing hunger that looked like it could swallow the world. Instead of sleep, that’s all Yule saw as they tried to tune out the piano. Why, if they really cared, did they only see those eyes. 

After the second time, it was all the same. They took 4 times the recommended dose of some old sleep medication Dess had left in the medicine cabinet to stop themself from seeing The Angel’s visions and her face, but all it did was send them into a fevered state where the only thing they could hear was Mom crying in the kitchen below. They couldn’t tell if it was real or imagined at that point, they stopped keeping track of the time after Noelle came upstairs to sleep. 

When they finally got up to use the bathroom, they were dizzy, weak, and mostly blind from the light, but they gained some clarity when they could barely make out a smear of blood on the athletic tee they’d been given to leave the hospital with. They must’ve had a nosebleed while they were still feverish, which meant they were close to passing out. It’d been years since their last one, but the whole family still teased them about the “most creative cookie decorating they’d ever seen”. They knew they had to get to sleep soon, one way or another. 

They stumbled back into the room and, barely able to hold themself up, turned the TV on to the horror channel. It would hurt, but not as much as losing Dess did, and it was only fair they got enough sleep to be composed when the detective came to talk to them again. They owed this to her, and deserved whatever happened afterwards. The last thing they thought as they climbed back onto their bed was that it was so, so cold, and then they plunged their hand through their chest, and the world went dark.

That was how they had ended up with a terrible headache and an equally upset stomach, rolling slowly out of bed and to their wardrobe while Mom continued to shout in the kitchen downstairs. They tossed the now crusty blood-stained shirt into the laundry basket that sat next to the couch and picked out the most insulated Christmas sweater they owned. Whatever was in the medicine had made them groggy, hungry, and cold, so now all they wanted was to be warm and as far away from reality as possible. The din of a cheap ghost hunting show on the TV kept away the memories for a while, but they eventually caught back up, the disquieting panning shots of an abandoned front yard sending them straight back to the woods. 

They could barely focus on the remote long enough to change the channel, but it didn’t help. It never seemed to help. Instead, they managed to get shoes on and pull themself out of the bedroom door, closing it as quietly as possible in case Elly woke up. Apart from a hug when Yule got out of the hospital, they hadn’t spoken to each other once, which made them incredibly nervous. Would she hate them like Mom hated Kris now? The thought made every step that much heavier, green eyes shaky and unfocused as Yule forced themself further down the stairs and towards the couch. Surely the living room would give at least some respite compared to the bed, at least temporarily.

Yule’s vision blurred as they laid across the couch, now nearly taking up the whole thing when laying rather than sitting, much to Noelle’s chagrin. Part of what had made sleep so hard, in addition to the terrible waking nightmares, was the constant ache in their legs, which the doctors had said was normal for humans their age. Dad kept joking that they’d tower over Asgore one day, but that particular visual hadn’t exactly soothed their fear or anxiety regarding the situation. They would’ve never heard of the end of it from Kris if it’d been true, before…

Their thoughts were interrupted by a voice, now intelligible, from just beyond the kitchen door. Yule’s eyes slammed shut as fast as they could make them go, and they silently lamented their lack of sleep. Of course Mom would be audible from this close to the kitchen, what were they thinking. They could only hope she didn’t come into the living room. 

“What do you MEAN you can’t search again, of course you can! I’m the Mayor, I tell you what you can and can’t do, and I’m telling you right now that you’ll search for as long as it takes. If Toriel and Undyne disagree with your methods, so be it. If you have to, tell them it's on orders from the mayor. I will not have my police chief be cowed by some frivolous reservations about using resources. Our crime record has been basically spotless before now, it's not like I pay you for anything else. Let me remind you that your own child might never recover normally unless you can FIND MY DAUGHTER, Asgore,” She sounded different than Yule remembered, her voice lower, and hoarse. 

They weren’t entirely sure why she was so angry at Uncle Asgore; he had apparently been out searching even back when Kris woke up at the hospital, according to Detective Harmen. Besides, Dess would come back. The Angel told them so, they thought? They didn’t remember exactly what they’d been told, but if The Angel had directed it, it must have been good. So why did it feel so bad at the back of their mind? They weren’t sure of anything anymore, not really, apart from their faith in their family and The Angel. They protected Yule from anything, they’d protect them now. 

“You know what, forget it. If it's such a media sensation all of a sudden, I have a better solution. Why don’t you take a leave of absence, for your own health of course. No one would question your need, and you could continue to search with Rudy and I afterwards,” There was a tense pause, Yule’s green eyes now open and unfocused. They wanted to listen for any update they could, gather even a small bit of information that could tell them more about how Kris was doing or what had happened to The Angel. 

“Fine, Asgore! If your wife doesn’t understand the fucking gravity of the situation, I’ll make the choice for you. You’re done on the force, effectively immediately. You haven’t served properly since December went missing, and now are actively refusing to lead an investigation. I’ll fill out the paperwork later at City Hall. But, do not misunderstand me, Dreemurr. If you ever stop searching for my daughter, or refuse to tell me what that shitheel of yours says when they talk, and they will talk, I’ll have your head in my freezer and your children out of here before your wife can lay a hand on me. I found a wonderful facility for children with severe trauma in 

Springfield when Yule was still screaming, I think it’d be a perfect fit for someone like Kris. Now, good day, Asgore, I have more important business to attend to. I’ll expect your badge in my office by tomorrow morning,” Yule barely heard the phone click or the long, exasperated sigh that followed it, instead silently holding back a gasp and staring out the window,  tire tracks in the snow where Dad had already left for work. They knew that Mom had been concerned about their mental state after the initial attempts to wake them up failed, but they never knew it’d gone that far. Would they have really just been dumped into some crazy’s jail for being hurt? 

The phantom pain in their gut returned briefly, unnoticed as they instead turned to the family photo which hung on the mantle above the basement door. They’d been so happy that day, surrounded by everyone they loved, but now they wondered if it was ever real. Dess had been unhappy nearly every time they tried to hang out together alone, and Mom was never home long enough to pay much attention to anyone other than Dad. 

He was their real champion (besides Elly, of course), the one who stuck up for them and who they confided in after they saw The Angel. He said it was normal to see things in scary moments, and that made them so much better. At least someone believed, would always believe, without needing to consider sending them away. It made their stomach churn, trying to rationalize what they’d heard. Maybe they didn’t need to, maybe it’d just been “calling their bluff”, like Mom always said. She’d never really considered sending Yule away, she said just so to get Uncle Asgore to look for Dess. Of course, it made perfect sense. It was the smart thing to do, the thing Mom always tried to do. 

The kitchen door creaked open slowly, heels clicking on the wood as Carol Holiday entered the living room and gently wiped tears away from her face with her handkerchief. She went briefly towards the couch to check her phone before leaving for the office, stopping for a second to see… Yuletide? They both jumped back when they saw each other, Yule nearly falling off the couch and onto their face. They quickly tied their hair back into a messy ponytail with a bracelet Elly had given them and stood up to face their mother. They had to look as composed as possible after what they’d heard.

“Yuletide, what are you doing up so early? I thought you’d be resting after that awful detective harassed you at the hospital. Well, I suppose it's good that you’re back on your feet anyway. You’ll be going back to school on Monday, and have tennis and violin lessons again on Tuesday. Your debate coach will let you miss practice if you need, but I expect you to go unless you have another academic obligation. You must continue to improve your speech if you want to be good enough for an acceptable school,” She finished her usual spiel with a short look at her watch, which told her what Yule already knew. 

It was almost 9am, when she had her first meeting. They had begun to panic internally at the thought of being completely alone for the few hours before Elly properly woke up, especially since they couldn’t use the computer without either being reminded of Dess or waking Elly up early, which would probably make her even more angry than Mom had just been. As a last ditch gamble, they tried to appeal to their Mom’s love for “academic enrichment”, which to them was just another word for extra work. 

“That’s fine, Mom, I’ll go. I promised Coach Richmond I’d practice to show my skills, anyway. Speaking of my skills, I was hoping I could, um… go with you to city hall today, to help you out? You’re always talking about ‘internship opportunities’ when I’m older, maybe this could be practice for that?” They thought they’d done a good job of convincing her, considering her lack of immediate rejection, but still gripped one side of their sweater tightly. If this failed, they’d be in a difficult spot. Carol stood there stone faced for a moment, ever-vigilant to make sure no one could tell what she was thinking or feeling without her permission.

“That is… a respectable dedication to your education, Yuletide. I suppose you can assist me with sorting paperwork and taking minutes during my meetings, if you promise to be silent and do what I ask of you. It is the least I can do after the last few weeks, and you would probably be a more efficient assistant than any of the incompetents we have the budget to actually employ. Come on then, we can’t wait around talking or I’ll be late to the meeting with the district superintendent. We’ve had a drop in math scores and he’s been furious at me over it for a month. Of course, Toriel was no help,” She continued to go on about the logistics of funding Hometown’s admittedly miniscule testing infrastructure, but Yule really paid no attention. 

Instead, they searched their pockets for the pen they’d stashed while getting on one of their nicer pairs of shoes, black flats from some fancy brand based in Milan. Dad bought them the pair when he went to an architectural conference in Italy, which was a relief considering all of their other shoes were either running tennis shoes, loafers, or the single pair of dress shoes they’d inherited from Dess, which barely fit them both because they were too large and fit for hooves, meaning they had to awkwardly shove their feet between the original dimensions of the shoe and Dess’ inserts, which they never figured out how to remove. They did look a little silly considering the combination of nice shoes and Christmas sweater, but Mom said that some effort was better than none at all, so they went with it and rushed outside to join their mother in the car. 

The car ride itself was uneventful, the streets of Hometown still quiet after the news about Dess broke. It hurt to see it like this, but Mom finally started to talk about her plans to talk to the governor about his re-election campaign soon, which interested Yule much more than any news about the school district did. They listened with an intense stillness which persisted even into her office, where Yule found themself running back and forth between filing cabinets and supply closets to grab whatever the Mayor needed to finish her paperwork before the meeting. 

The meeting itself was rather uneventful, especially since Carol used Yule’s presence as an excuse to bring up her children’s exemplary performance at state testing. Yule’s notes weren’t great, but they were good enough for what was otherwise a minor meeting, which Carol noted while giving them a speech about the importance of playing different roles to get concessions out of different people. At first, Yule was about as bored as they’d been at home, but soon Carol had to attend an important city council meeting regarding Dess that Yule had been trying to avoid at all costs, which meant that she gave them the duty of answering her personal phone, which only a handful of state officials and friends had access to. They enjoyed playing with the script their mother had left for them in different ways depending on who was calling, and they ended up in several long conversations with various older monsters about everything about sympathy for them regarding Dess to how humans worked, all of which made them feel better. 

They felt important, respected, and, at least for a while, lost in the tasks and weight of it all. By the time Mom got back from the meeting, Yule had taken almost two dozen calls, and was currently recording one from the governor. At first, Carol was horrified, especially because Yule was terribly awkward around family, but she quickly took a softer stance when she heard him laugh over the phone. Yuletide, the one who could barely figure out how a knock-knock joke worked, had made him of all people laugh? There was potential here, so she let them keep going while she finished sending out emails to hospital suppliers in Ebbot City, listening closely so she could intervene if anything went wrong. It was great to see that Yule was taking a strong interest in something so young, especially since December never did and Noelle had too many fixations to decide on one. Perhaps she should bring them along more often, if they learned better discipline. 

“Thank you so much Mr.Governor, I’ll be sure to let my Mom know that you send your sympathies, and Noelle and I both look forward to visiting your family soon! Bye now, have a great day,” They sounded genuine when they put the phone down, but really just felt exhausted as they got up from the desk and moved to one of the chairs their Mom used for visitors. Finally, after what felt like another 2 hours of various menial tasks, they left the city hall and headed for home. Elly was awake by the time Yule swung the door open for their mother, lounging on the couch working on some piece of homework. She shot Yule a confused look, somewhat hurt, and said nothing, barely even acknowledging that Carol was there at all. 

Yule realized that leaving the house for the whole day without telling Elly might’ve given a worse impression than they already had, which made them wince internally. They’d have to break the ice eventually, but that eventually wasn’t tonight. They felt so tired that their feet could fall off, moving into the kitchen to give Dad a hug and set the table. Before they set about preparing the table for the onslaught of enchiladas that would soon arrive, Carol asked them to come and talk for a minute.

“Thank you for all your help today, Yuletide. You were very productive compared to your usual schoolwork, so I will take it that you enjoyed doing the tasks I gave you. Because of that, I think that it is appropriate for you to come and help me more often, to help teach you more about my job and meet the people you need to know. It’ll be a lot of work, and I expect you to maintain your position in the class, but I feel as though work is just what you need to take your mind away from… recent events. One of the lessons I want you and Noelle to learn is that you must never let your emotions get in the way of your goals, and if that means working as long as you can, you are all the better for it,”.

Chapter Text

Detective Harmen spoke softly into their recorder, bringing it closer to their mouth so as to not make their voice inaudible. This particular device was dated, and got harder to use every year, but they had no idea how to use any of the newfangled stuff, so it had to suffice. 

“Questioning Rudolph Holiday, father of the victim. Current subject is December’s activity before the disappearance and the nature of her personal troubles. Witness has been asked to specifically describe December’s relationship to Krismas Dreemurr and Yuletide Holiday, the two other victims and only known humans living in the Hometown area. Testimony continues now,” They finished and put the recorder back down, the reindeer monster in front of them shifting nervously. It wasn’t enough to make them suspicious of anything, but it was annoying, especially when they were trying to focus on writing down their own notes about what he’d said.

“Mr.Holiday, could you start by telling us more about December’s closeness with Kris in particular. You mentioned yesterday that she was always closer with them than Yuletide, could you elaborate on that?”

“Ummm…. Of course, Detective. I’m sorry for the hesitation, but Carol was always the one who talked with the police after Dess’ escapades, faha. I guess I’m just… not prepared for something like this. But, anyway, yeah, Dess and Kris were thick and thieves, two weird peas in their own little pod. December loved her siblings, especially Noelle, but I think Kris spoke to her in a different way. They shared a lot of her hopes, and her insecurities,” He cut himself off there, thumbs twiddling while he tapped one hoof against the table leg. 

“What insecurities did they share exactly? I’m sorry for asking you for such specifics, but it helps us to understand December’s motivation in sneaking out, which could help us find her. Kris still hasn’t talked either, which means we need any information that could let us get through to them,”  They quickly made a note of December’s common cause with Kris and moved on, hoping that something here could actually reveal anything more than interpersonal drama. 

“Well, they both felt out of place in their own skin, I guess. Dess took after me when I was younger, I suppose, but man was she better at being a rebel than I was. She went above and beyond to make us as uncomfortable as possible as often as possible, and succeeded more often than not, fahaha. She wasn’t academic or focused like Carol, or an artist or writer like me. She struggled to make friends and do well in school, and it made her feel like she didn’t belong. When she was about 8 or 9, maybe, right after we brought Kris and Yule home, she got crazy into humans, and I mean really crazy. I’m sure Carol or Yule already told you that her horns were unusually prone to shedding early, that’s because of this. At the time it happened, we thought she’d been getting bullied at school, but that illusion ended when I told her that I’d kick the bully’s ass in front of her class. She had uh… taken them off, herself,” He cleared his throat a bit, looking down at his hooves. This subject seemed uniquely difficult for him

“You’ve seen her records, Detective, and I don’t feel like I need to speak on my daughter’s personal struggles to that depth for the purpose of this investigation, but I can tell you that she was just a young girl who didn’t feel like she had an identity anymore. She latched onto this idea of humanity as an alternative to us, Hometown. You’ve seen our little town, Cal. It's not exactly a cornucopia of species diversity like Ebbot City, heh. She saw how Kris and Yule looked different and saw something appealing, it's as simple as that. But, for us, it was difficult to imagine. She said she hated her horns, that she absolutely needed the newest human brands of shoes, that she wanted to hide her tail under baggy jeans. Carol and I were thrown for a loop, but I felt like we should support her. She was still our daughter, and maybe some cultural exchange could do her good. Carol was absolutely against it though, especially after she found Dess on some human-only forum online. She thought it could blow up into a scandal if she ever ran for office, especially after the riots in 2012. You probably remember those well, Detective,” With this, Cal’s hand clenched, the pen shaking as they finished writing down notes. How did he know about their time in New York? They’d expected something like this out of Carol, but not her soft-spoken husband.

“Fahaha, I’m just kidding, Cal. I’m not as political as my wife, I don’t care what you get up to you outside of the office. Just, remember that you’re here to help us look for our daughter and get justice for our children, nothing more. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say the yellow SOUL meant lemonade, fahaha!” He had stopped fidgeting entirely, mustache twitching slightly as his stare seared proverbial holes through Detective’s Harmen head. If he thought that a lemon SOUL joke of all things was going to set them off, he had severely overestimated the efficacy of whatever training his wife had given him. They quickly scribbled down a note about witness cooperation and gestured at him to continue talking. 

“So, when a kid who’s recently gotten super into human culture gets a human sibling, you’d expect them to be over the moon, right? But Yule didn’t really fit Dess’ vision of what a human was, per se. As you know, they have basically no memories of any other humans besides you and Kris, so our culture was theirs. They had no idea that other humans were even real until we told them, they just thought you and Kris were some common monster species that had strange SOUL traits. Kris, though, knew full well what humans were, they just hated them. At first, that made Dess furious, but she understood after Toriel bought Kris those devil horns. They were just trying to fit in, both of them were, in their own ways. Once they got talking honestly, they were inseparable. It was nice, honestly, for both of them to have someone else to confide in. Asriel, Noelle, and Yule were always great, but they could be snobbish, sometimes, if you know what I mean,” He finished with a sigh, leaning back in the chair again. Well, that certainly explained a few things from Dess’ computer and Kris’ willingness to go along with her plan. They’d been aware of her desire to achieve some sort of dream, but they had no idea what it could’ve been until now. 

“Thank you very much for that, Mr.Holiday. It may well be incredibly useful to us in our investigation. If I may continue along that same line of inquiry, did Dess ever express intent to act on this fantasy in any way besides her attachment to Kris and, er, antler struggles? If we can pin down a concrete motivation, it may help us tell where she might’ve been going that night besides the shelter, or what she was going there to find,” They knew this conversation was going to be awkward, but there was really nothing else they could ask that would be useful at that point. Carol and Chief Asgore (former chief now, if they had heard correctly) had given more than enough detail in regards to timeline, it was just a matter of piecing together what exactly Dess had been after when she left the house with Kris and, unknowingly, Yule in tow.

“Not that I can really remember, no, apart from a few smaller things. I already told you about keeping her tail tucked, but she also kept her fur incredibly short, normal stuff you’d expect from a kid going through that phase. I think the main strange thing besides her internet habits were the conventions, baseball and the shoes. Around her 9th birthday, she started asking for custom shoes, expensive ones. I think she started out with a pair of Converse, which aren’t too expensive, but trust me, getting hoof inserts fitted for each pair was one of the least streamlined and most annoying processes I’ve ever been through, and that’s from someone who contracts for the government! We did end up getting them though, and she was the happiest I’d ever seen her. I have to admit, they did also look good on her, but Carol was furious again. She kept talking about these human fads, but everyone else accepted her interests. It was nice for her to share something with us at all, honestly,” He sounded more interested than he had before, but Cal was profoundly bored. Shoes were great and all, they wore them too, but a monster having an interest in human shoes wasn’t exactly a normal or sufficient reason to go into an abandoned emergency shelter late at night. 

“Baseball was where we got a bit concerned, to be honest. I always used to say ‘whatever you do, Doe-si-doh, go get' em!’, but she took that to heart. She’d done a bit of softball back in Ebbot City when she was younger, but she never really liked it, and it was expensive to put her in the monster league, so we knew she was a great batter, but when she discovered baseball she just took off with it. Problem was, there wasn’t even a rule on monsters and humans in the Ebbot City League because of how niche it is among us monsters, so we weren’t sure how to get her into it. Thankfully though, the coach there was very understanding, and reindeer monsters are very comparable to you humans in strength anyway, so she was able to join after a bit of paperwork and a few tests. That was my little rockstar, always overcoming the odds, fahaha! She loved it, of course, and was good at it, but she complained a lot about the others. They respected her, but didn’t like her, especially because she was a monster. They didn’t think she had to work for her strength, which is total bullshit, but I digress. It made her get more anxious, and her mentor, Mr.Boom, died shortly after, which didn’t help. After that, apart from music, all she did was hang out with the Dreemurrs and play with her baseball team. I think she wanted to get closer to them, and it sorta drove her crazy sometimes. Asriel helped, but not enough. She was never really connected with anyone else her age,” He looked regretful now, but didn’t go on further, so Detective Harmen finished their notes and prompted him themself. 

“So, what about these conventions you talked about? There’s a lot of different community events here in the city, and even more in Boston, so I’d like specifics on her interests there, if you can provide them. After that, I just need to ask you about the internet, which I’m sure you knew was coming, and you can get out of here,” They swiveled around in their chair and grabbed a sip of their water bottle (filled with Costcutter brand vodka, as befitting a detective), turning back as Rudy once again cleared his throat. Odd amount of times to be doing it over the course of one conversation, but they guessed they couldn’t judge.

“Well, honestly, I’m not 100% sure myself. At first she told me it was some human music thing that she and Azzy both liked, and that the younger kids wanted to come along so they could learn about human culture. Carol was suspicious, of course, but it looked legitimate, so we both reluctantly said fine. Between all of us, only Toriel has even remotely enough time to take the kids out, and she’s not really the type to go near a music festival, so we figured this would be a safe enough test of Asriel’s ability to drive now that he has his license. Then, though, when I actually decided to look it up, it was some scientific and cultural conference, sort of a double feature. There was human music, that was true enough, but it was some weird historical reproduction of instruments played thousands of years ago. Same with just about everything there, from what I can tell. Half dealt with the history of human mythology, the other with new scientific discoveries in anthropology. Now, I’m not sure about you, but I have never once heard of a teenager being remotely interested in advanced human studies, much less two monsters and their siblings who, by all rights, don’t even know what the words science or culture mean,” He looked somewhat concerned, facing down once again, muzzle twitching. They were finally getting somewhere.

“That was last year, of course. I was honestly very concerned, because Dess was about the exact opposite type of person than the one who would lie to her parents to sneak IN to a scientific conference, but I gave her the benefit of the doubt and just hoped that Asriel and the kids were supporting her in finally discovering her passion, since it seemed like they wouldn’t get much more out of it than they would at any other history museum in the city. I was right in the end, apparently. Dess came home with a stack of papers I never read and various random human knickknacks, while Asriel and the kids apparently had watched some very amusing rendition of an ancient human dance before going to get ice cream, see the new Pet Brigade movie, and play at the park. Leave it to Asriel to figure out how to stay within a mile of the convention center for 8 hours with 3 kids, that one’s a natural like his mother. Anyway, they were going to go this year as well, next month actually, but obviously that won’t be happening now. The closer it got to Christmas, the more Dess wanted to talk about the conference, especially the papers she’d read. She kept spouting off nonsense about magic and monster-human genetics none of us understood, but I tried to stay supportive and just hope actually going to the conference would sort out whatever questions she had. Clearly, it wasn’t enough, but I just don’t get what that shelter had in it that literal rooms of scientists didn’t. We haven’t even had an adult human living here for half a century or more, there’s nothing here for whatever research she was doing,” His voice cracked slightly at the end, voice shaky and unfocused. Cal could tell that he was reaching the end of his rope in terms of questions, but this provided a huge lead, so it’d been worth it.

“Do you still have access to all of the papers Dess got from last year’s convention? Those could give us valuable clues into Dess’ motivations if you turn them over. I understand that it could be hard going through her things, but time is incredibly important in cases like this, so we need all the leads we can as quickly as possible,” they were frowning as they looked over their notes, still largely unsure of where this was going other than a very awkward conversation with December, if she did turn up, about boundaries regarding other’s humanity.

“Yes, I would guess so, unless she managed to throw them out without us noticing. This is all so overwhelming for us, though, so we might need a minute. Yule is out of the hospital now, and Carol and I both still have to work, at least until my leave gets approved. Old papers have been the last thing on our minds, to be candid,” He sounded genuinely exhausted, which was Cal’s signal to move on to their final, and most important, part of questioning Mr.Holiday.

“Of course, the department understands your feelings and thanks you for cooperating. However, there is one more thing I have to ask you about Mr.Holiday. I think you know what I mean when I say the internet history, so I’ll let you give your interpretation before I chime in, just to ensure your statement provides the most useful testimony possible,”  They looked smug as they pulled out a large folder and began to thumb through it silently, seeing nothing but Rudy’s hard stare through their aviators. This would certainly be an interesting response.

“Detective, you know that my family is hurting right now, I will respectfully ask you to stick to details today, and not anything that is not strictly useful in the case at hand. Yes, it is true that my daughter searched for and engaged in conversation online concerning several objects banned from import and heavily regulated by the government. I understand the implications of obtaining or holding books of magic, weapons classified as antiques, and human remains without a permit, and I know full well that December’s engagement in intense demonological research concerning world religions was purely academic, evidenced by her wide breadth of search. The things my daughter sought were perfectly at home in the collection of any other wealthy collector, which is exclusively and exhaustively the extent of her interest and caliber in the field of anthropology and magical history. While there are specific searches which may indicate concerning mental health issues, myself and Carol have worked tirelessly to ensure that December is getting any help she needs, and any intrusive thoughts she may have had while online late at night do not reflect her actual mental state at any point. Let me remind you that, in addition to nearly unlimited examples of searches about music, horror movies, recent video games, and alternative clothing, many of the “concerning things” that were flagged were otherwise harmless, such as 7 different colors of dye which are normally used for painting fur and a sculpture of a black cat which could be bought from any crafts store around Halloween. There’s nothing here that we believe would be pertinent to the investigation, especially since the particular searches you showed to me and my wife did not involve the shelter or its contents in any way,” He breathed out heavily after speaking, almost coughing, but steadying himself and once again facing Detective Harmen head on. So that's how it's gonna be? Fine, let Rudy see what kind of innocent collection December had actually been up to.

“Mr.Holiday, let me remind you that December is regularly around humans who trust her, who have a sibling relationship with her. That is why, when we see things like ‘removing the SOUL’ or ‘ways to gain a human SOUL’ on someone’s search history along with all of the artifacts you mentioned, we get concerned. We both know that there’s likely no credibility to this woo-woo, but December clearly did, and her involvement in several chats and groups under watch by the Cybercrimes Unit for occult behavior and extreme levels of pro-human sentiment, which was made a potential extremist marker last year, if you recall, paint a concerning picture about her beliefs at the time of her disappearance. All of this tells us that December’s behavior was not just troubled, but actively worrisome, especially since she appears to have successfully purchased a few of those less harmful ingredients you’d mentioned. The worst part is, we can’t find those parts, specifically the cat sculpture or antique pair of spectacles, anywhere at the crime scene or surrounding area, which points to a suspect with potential foreknowledge of December’s intentions. You’ve told me all you’re going to, you’ve made that more than clear, but I will warn you. If you or anyone you know was associated with December’s search or inquiries into these topics, we will find out, and we will take action. Now, have a good day Mr.Holiday, and remember to send us those documents as soon as you find them,” They finished with a smile and  tip of their hat, opening the door for Rudy, who was silent as he stepped out and moved to check out of the station. 

Cal sat back in their chair and let out a long breath, one yellow eye barely visible under their hat. Somehow, the interview had gone both better and worse than they’d expected, all things considered. They had gained valuable information about December’s personal life and how she got into circles that they themself hadn’t even visited when they worked with the 2012’ers, but there were still many puzzle pieces missing that they just couldn’t excuse. Most obviously of all was the shelter, which seemed fully and completely unrelated to everything that they’d seen so far, and which the results of December’s search on hadn’t yielded anything the Detective had found particularly interesting, though that may change if Rudy followed through with his promise and delivered additional documents. 

They were also still unconvinced of Dess’ motivation, even if the case for wanting to fit in with humans was stronger. She had a nearly perfect setup to do whatever she wanted in life, and her personal life seemed to be recovering rather than declining, so it seemed strange to take such drastic action for a simple childhood fantasy. This was especially pressing to them because, whatever had happened, it’d been enough for Dess to both go out with supplies that she knew weren’t complete and take Kris, which meant what she searched for had to be larger than some minor wish. They groaned again and settled down for a nap, boots outstretched across the metal table. Only The Angel knew where December Holiday had gone at this point. 

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“Yule, I don’t care what Dad said about teaching you trig, I’m not going to do it if you won’t let me use the computer. Sorry, but I’m already too busy with Berdly to have to drag you along too unless you let me play Cat Petterz to unwind. Besides, we’re going to church in 30 minutes. You and Berdly combined couldn’t win a match of Super Smash Fighters that fast, much less beat Minecrap, faha!” Noelle’s annoyed voice echoed out of the bathroom as Yule slammed their fist on the disk, nearly sending the framed photo of them and Kris dumping ice and each other sailing onto the carpet below. Not only had they lost another solo match of Nightwatch because their aim was terrible, they also had to give up their remaining computer time if they had any hope of passing next week’s math test. 

They lamented Mom for making them skip 2 grades of math with Noelle last year, since it now took up double the time of any other subject they had in school. They weren't natural at it like Noelle, they couldn’t read an equation like they could  a person, and there was nothing interesting to make them memorize it beyond the motivation to get a good grade. And, worst of all, it’d made Noelle confident enough in her leverage over them to start making demands. Mom always said that Elly wasn’t as willful as Dess unless she knew she had you in a corner, which meant she REALLY didn’t think Yule could do this on their own. Maybe she was right. Either way, studying the notes had been one of the best ways to take their mind off of Dess while living up to Moms expectations, so Noelle was right in assuming that they couldn’t practically refuse. 

“Fine, Elly, I’ll get ready for church and you can play. Thank you for doing my homework, I love you,” They didn’t mean to sound as exasperated as they actually were when trying to please her, but the change from their usual demeanor was too obvious. The atmosphere between the two had been tense since Yule got back from the hospital, even more so after they’d started helping their mother out at her office. Worse, the Dreemurrs were still barely talking to any of them, and basically zero headway had been made into Dess’ disappearance. All of it had left the family on edge, even if Yule could take some of that edge off by throwing themself into their work. They knew Elly wouldn’t understand what they saw, why they couldn’t remember, why they had avoided talking to her, so they just never bothered to try. She’d take the hint eventually and understand that they just needed everything to go back to normal, at least as normal as it could be. 

Their church clothes in question were, unlike most of their wardrobe, not mix of Dess’ hand-me-downs and random items they’d needed to buy but a specifically tailored suit and tie, originally for their debate tournaments but now in general use for any formal function that didn’t warrant wearing a dress to match with Noelle instead. They didn’t mind dresses more broadly, and enjoyed feeling pretty every so often, but they were usually more active than a nice dress allowed, and they got itchy or cold easily in all of the ones Elly liked, so they stuck with a suit when they could. Though they would usually wear a dark green dress shirt when it was available, they decided on a white one today, to match The Angel, and a simple red tie to compliment it. 

Dad would tie the tie himself, since they were both too clumsy to do it and left-handed, which made finding good tutorials online exceedingly difficult. More often than not, they’d tie it backwards somehow, leaving them to simply wear no tie more times than they would’ve liked to admit. They made a mental note to practice when they had more time, since Mom wanted to take them and Elly to have dinner with the Governor’s family next month, and she said Yule could only wear whatever they could put on themself. Another thing to lament while they struggled into their dress pants and tightened the belt, taking the navy blue suit jacket off the hook as their final step. The jacket had to be extended, which Mom hadn’t been happy about, but they didn’t mind. If they were going to be a twig, they might as well be the biggest of the bundle. 

All-in-all, after moving to the bathroom to brush their hair (still almost platinum blond down to their shoulders, then green for two more inches after Mom finally let them experiment with dye), they looked better than they had in a long time, which made them smile. Dess would’ve made fun of them for it, but looking good genuinely helped their confidence like Mom said it would, so they were grateful for it. They still weren’t sure they’d be ready to go out in front of the whole town again, but it had to happen eventually, so it might as well be today, when they would be with Dad and Elly. Mom was helpful, and could be loving when they needed it, but they felt the weight of her expectations whenever she was around, which only really made their anxiety worse if they were already on edge. This would be an opportunity to unwind and relax, even if the setting was a bit formal.

Yule moved back into their bedroom with a wide stride, picking up the book they’d been reading from the desk and opening to the marked page while flopping onto the couch. Mom and Dad had agreed to get the pair phones after what happened with Dess, but so far there’d been no progress, so Yule still relied on whatever books they could pick up in the library or from the bookstore in Ebbot City to entertain themself, which was shockingly little. They enjoyed horror most of all, which limited their options, and couldn’t stand romance, which limited them even further. Oh well, it was something.

“Hey Elly, whatya doing? Looking for another headless cat, faha?” Yule had tried basically every approach to small talk before today, but with only a few minutes until church they figured that Noelle might be more receptive now, and they were incredibly bored with the book they’d been reading. The middle of a novel always seemed to slouch more than the rest, they’d found.

“I don’t know, Yule, maybe I am. If I saw something important, I’d tell you about it. After all, that’s what siblings are for, isn’t it. To have someone to talk to, if there’s anything you need to say,” Her words stung, and made Yule grip the couch hard enough to turn their knuckles white. With a scowl on their face, they got up and stomped out of the room, nearly getting down the stairs before realizing that they’d left their hymnal upstairs, meaning they’d have to go back and get it. Both Yule and Noelle usually sang in the choir, so they had personal copies they had to bring to church every Sunday, which meant they didn’t get extras if they forgot. Yule wasn’t sure they wanted to sing in the choir, but it was better to bring it than not, even if they’d basically memorized it after years of attendance. They’d have to say something to Elly now, it’d be way too awkward if they just silently walked in and left again. Reluctantly, they moved towards the door, cracking it open slowly to see Elly, her head face down on the desk. She had opened Waterbear and looked up something which Yule could only assume was December Holiday, but was now difficult to make out because of her horns resting on the keyboard. She wasn’t making a sound, which was rare for Noelle, so Yule sidestepped her and grabbed the hymnal off their desk, shoving it in their jacket pocket awkwardly before walking over and putting their hand on her shoulder.

“Hey Elly,  I’m sorry. I don’t know how else to tell you this, but the reason I haven’t talked to you, or Dad, or anyone, is because I don’t remember. I didn’t see Dess go missing, I saw something else, something you wouldn’t understand. Something I don’t even understand. I love you Elly, I do, but I can’t tell you anything because The Angel won’t let me. I’m scared too, but we have to do what Father Alvin says and trust in Their judgement. They wouldn’t just tell me about this for no reason, there must be something bigger, for me. We’ve always wondered about that, haven’t we? Wondered where I came from. We’ll only have to wonder a bit longer, if we follow Them. If I tried telling you now, tried telling anyone now, it could ruin it, ruin everything. Please, I know you’re angry, but trust me. We’ll find her, I know it,” Yule leaned down and squeezed her hand, her hard hooflike fingers curling around theirs tightly. She stared up at Yule, brown eyes wet while her muzzle twitched. 

“Why, Yule? Why, if you’re so certain about this, didn't you say ANYTHING to me before? She’s our sister, not just some side story to your Magic Angelic Prophecy, Yule. I want to believe you SO badly Yule, believe that this was all for something, but how can I when you don’t tell me what’s going on. Even if this had NOTHING to do with Dess at all, we tell each other everything. I always tell you when I have a weird dream, or when I find a new cryptid to hunt, even if I’m not sure if it's real or not. But, for some reason, you decide that now is the time to start keeping secrets, to stop talking to me, to pretend like everything’s okay? Why, Yule, why pretend. Dess is gone, and everything’s falling apart. Now though, when I try to ask you about it, try to tell you about Mom and Dad or Kris or Aunt Toriel, you just block me out. You go silent or change the topic. It feels like you left me, Yule, left me here alone. So, if you’re going to talk to your Angel, fine, but don’t come asking me for anything until you trust me enough to tell me the whole truth, and nothing else,” Her voice cracked on the last words, a tear or two rolling down the fur on her face as she got up from the computer and looked for her own hymnal, leaving Yule standing with a tie in one hand and nothing in the other, staring blankly at the computer monitor. 

They felt numb, like a bucket of cold water had just been poured on their head. They stood there until Noelle left, then turned and stared down at the Delta Rune on their rug, still completely silent. When they stared into the rug, slowly, they felt something, a hard pit that seemed to grow in their stomach. They thought they should feel sad, even guilty about what they’d told Noelle, but all they felt was anger. It was a spiteful, rising anger, spreading across their heart like a creeping vine. How dare she? Yule had been there for her their entire life, they were best friends, but when they finally found something real, something special in the face of tragedy, she turned around and spat in their face? Sure, they talked, but this was something else, a gift which one did not just talk about freely. Elly couldn’t understand the feelings, the promises they’d given, their words they had to keep. It wasn’t fair, she never had to be good enough to be a Holliday, never had to feel like she was somewhere she didn’t belong. The Angel knew Yule, loved Yule, like Mom and Dad did. Like Elly used to. The Angel wouldn’t lie to them, Noelle should know that, so why was she still mad? It made no sense, it made them… They jumped back as the door creaked open, Rudy leaning in with a smile. They realized they’d been standing there for almost 20 minutes, eyes unfocused and sweat covering their brow. 

“Hey Snowmonster, it's time for church! Everything okay in here, Noelle said you were feeling a bit down? Anything you want to talk about while I tie your tie?” He gave a short cough and walked in, signaling Yule to sit down, which they did, slowly but surely. They felt sick to their stomach, but shook their head no and passed the tie over, which their father took gingerly. He kept trying to start a conversation with them, about anything, but it just felt like noise to Yule, who gave short responses and tried to avoid eye contact. His face was concerned, and his eyes looked… sad, but his voice betrayed nothing, so it wasn’t any real concern to them. The entire family was struggling, they knew as much, so there’s nothing they could do but follow their calling, follow what they knew was right. 

The tie only took a minute, but it made Yule soften by the end, and they ended up wrapping Rudy in a tight hug before they walked out together, Noelle already ready and reading the sheet music she’d perform in the choir. It’d look bad of them to back out now, so Yule opened the hymnal and flipped to the earmarked page, beginning to read of The Angel. Nothing they didn’t know already, of course. As they walked, they found the pages of old myths and legends about the Prophecy increasingly dull, so they shut the book and tried to look around. The Angel lived among us now, or so they said, so what better way to feel Their presence than to live it in the present moment. However, the present moment felt much more like a cold winter morning than anything holy, snow tickling their nose and wetting their suit, which made them wince. They’d have to wear their robes over it anyway to sing in the choir, but it was still frustrating to sit for an hour in a damp jacket. As they neared the church, they could hear the sound of laughter, and they began to smile, even the snow on the ground seemed to lessen. The Angel was merciful to them, truly.

Walking into church drew eyes, none of which made Yule particularly happy. They said their hellos and thank yous to Ms.Boom and the other elders who gave their condolences, and had brief conversations with Berdly and Catti, but were really only focused on one set of people. In the corner, where a few people were lighting candles for loved ones and the older kids were talking, was Kris, sitting alone while Asgore and Toriel talked quietly in the corner. They hadn’t had a chance to talk to Kris at all before today, much less Asriel. They were both witnesses, in their own way, to what Yule saw. They’d know something more, or at least confirm that Yule wasn’t crazy. The main problem, in their mind, was getting past Toriel, who had been incredibly protective of Kris at school. She barely let anyone even see them, much less Noelle and Yule, and they figured being at church wouldn’t make her lessen her grip. They decided to take a more subtle approach, tugging on their Dad’s sleeve until he stopped talking with Father Alvin and turned to face them.

“Hey Snowmonster, whatdja need?  They run out of yellow juice again, fahaha?” He leaned down and wiped a spec of dust off their suit. It made them blush a bit, but it was better than looking bad in front of the congregation.

“Can you help me light a candle for Mom? I want to put a new one up, but my hands are still a little shaky from everything,” They lied, hands firmly in their jacket pockets. They figured this would be their best method to get Toriel distracted, since she was still on good terms with Rudy. They felt a twinge of guilt for disrespecting her to get to Kris, but they had other priorities. They had to make sure they weren’t crazy, that they weren’t just making it up. Rudy nodded and said something short to Father Alvin, leading Yule over to the candles. Noelle was still talking with Catti and Jockington, so it was just the two of them who picked out a new candle from the rack and gingerly lit it up, Yule staring into the flame as it slowly began to emit a vaguely floral scent. They hugged their father just a little longer, both to buy time and, for once, because they felt connected again, like somewhat of a family again. Whatever they did in particular proved effective, as Toriel began to slowly approach the pair, Yule making up an excuse and scampering off towards Asriel and Kris at the first possible opportunity. 

They managed to get to Kris with little fanfare, their slumped position in the corner out of eyesight for most attendees and Asriel distracted talking with Pizzapants. Perfect.

“Kris, hey, it's Yule. I need to talk to you about Dess. You saw it too, right? You saw The Angel come out of the shelter when it opened, right? Just tell me I’m not crazy, we all saw something,” They shook Kris’ shoulder gently, their head swaying slightly before snapping back. Their red eyes went wide as they stared at Yule, and their mouth began to move, but no words came out, just a low sound that sounded like a cross between a moan and scream. It was grating, like nails on chalkboard, but quiet enough that Yule was able to shake Kris violently, eventually getting them to stop. Clearly, whatever they’d said hadn’t gone over well, but they had no idea what to say to make it better. They got up again, putting a hand over Kris’ left shoulder. They had to remind them then, if that’s what it took. Just as Yule leaned down to whisper into their ear, they felt another hand, softer, on their own shoulder. 

“Hey, Yule, can we talk? Service is about to start, so we have to head to the choir room anyway,” The low, quiet voice of Asriel sounded behind them, making Yule take their hand off Kris’ shoulder and turn bright red, slowly turning around and hoping he wasn’t as mad as Toriel would’ve been. Instead of anger on the goat’s face, though, Yule saw sadness. His normal brown dress shirt was crumpled, the flower drooping, and his eyes shone back an intense melancholy rather than his usual hope. Clearly, he was thinking similar thoughts to Yule, so they figured this was the best shot they had at getting anyone to talk that could even somewhat confirm what they thought. If Noelle really wanted to talk so badly, she shouldn’t have slept through the whole thing. They gently shook their head, Asriel beginning to walk slowly towards the choir room. 

“Um, so, I saw you with Kris, and I wanted to let you know that you didn’t do anything wrong, but you probably shouldn’t talk to them for a while. The Angel calls on us all for different things, and whatever happened with Dess scared Kris a lot more than it scared you, Yule. They aren’t talking anymore, they’re barely eating, they still haven’t even acknowledged us. I’ve come here every Sunday, you know, and I have faith in The Angel’s guidance, I really do, but it's scary for all of us, and Kris only gets worse when they’re reminded of what happened. I know The Angel calls us to be caring to our friends and family, but right now, it's best that you keep anything about Dess between us, okay? Dess was, um, very important to me, and I know that she was to you, too, so I hope we can talk more later, maybe with your Mom? For now, though, please, let Kris heal. I know you of all of us will understand that now, more than ever, we just need to have faith,” Asriel gave Yule another sad smile before passing them their robes, which they reluctantly shoved on. The feeling in their stomach had multiplied tenfold, enough for them to almost keel over as they lifted the robe over their head. It wasn’t fair, none of it was fair. Dess was gone, now Kris was gone, and now Azzy hated them too? How could The Angel put them through this if they were special, if they were chosen. It made no sense.

They stepped into choir formation just in time, voice beginning to rise but mind miles away, staring back into the shelter. The vision of  The Angel rose and fell with the notes their voice produced, shimmering like a mirage on the sands. This song was one they’d sung before, but always with Dess on the piano, never in the choir, and it made their eyes blur with tears. How did it come to this? They couldn’t stand it, couldn’t stand being alone anymore. Even with The Angel showing them a better future, it wasn’t worth it. Their voice felt as though it were on another planet, eyes barely able to see Dad’s concerned expression as their arms began to shake. The song was nearing its end, but Yule could only feel the cold. Their voice was loud but the air around them was so, so cold. As the music reached a crescendo and the choir sat down, it began to snow. All of the voices stopped, lights dim and pews empty, as the door at the far end of the church creaked open. It was still, so so cold. Yule tried to run, tried to do anything, but they were stuck, stuck back at the shelter, stuck where it snowed. The thing that had been December entered slowly, marching through the pews like a blind animal searching for prey. Her hair was wild, raggedy, down to her hips, and her eyes were deep red, pools of endless, hungry blood. 

“Come… here… Yuletide…. Come…. Meet your…. Angel,” Its tongue flicked against an exposed jaw, finally reaching the stage and wrapping a tail of darkness around their throat. Yule’s eyes closed, and they let out a scream, noise returning back to the room. They had to get out, had to escape this, had to get back to her. As they ran from the stage and down the pews, they heard Elly’s voice, Azzy’s voice, even Toriel, but it was all static. They had to find her, they had to find their sister.

Their feet pounded across the dirt, the remnants of a December snow creating a muddy soup which stained the hem of their robes and made the sides of their legs itch with a persistent feeling of uncleanliness. She was right there, they knew she was just behind those doors, just beyond where they could reach, but they kept running anyway. The Angel would’ve let her go, she had to be hiding on purpose, staying away from them on purpose. The grass was ice cold when they skidded to a halt in front of the looming gray shape of the shelter door and began to wail, teardrops stuck to their face and ice on their fingertips. The rusted hinges of the door shook weakly, their fist barely able to make a vibration.

“Dess, please, can you hear me? It's me, Yuletide. I know you’re there Dess, I know you are. We were going to go to QCs with Kris today, remember? You promised us milkshakes, Dess. Elly and I were so excited. Please, Dess, let's just go together. I’ll play whatever games you want, I swear!” A heavy sob shook their body, hands winding up again and pushing even harder against the iron. It made a louder sound, but that was all, and Yule heard nothing from the other side.

“It hurts, Dess. I love you, Dess, please. I know we sometimes get mad, but you’re my sister, Dess, my older sister. Please, just say anything to me. Just let me know you’re okay, that you’re there at all! Dess, I won’t ever be mad at you again, I love you forever. Please, Dess, you were always enough for me. Just come back with me to see Elly sing. PLEASE!” They sobbed even louder, pounded with both fists, but all they achieved was breaking the seal of caution tape that still wrapped the shelter in its embrace. It was too much, they needed their sister.

“DESS, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE. Just let me SEE you again, hold my hand again, tell me it's okay. PLEASE DESS, Mom and Dad are fighting and Kris isn’t talking and The Angel showed me things. I-I-I-can’t do it, Dess. I can’t huddle in your room and watch scary movies when Mom and Dad yell alone. Elly and I can’t hunt for cryptids at the lake without your binoculars. Kris and I can’t do the Human Olympics without a judge. Dess, you told me you’d be there to take us to the big convention in Ebbot City. You told me you’d come see us perform at graduation next month, Dess. You told me you’d shed your antlers so I could be the tallest Holiday. You said you wouldn’t let anyone hurt me. YOU PROMISED. It hurts right now, Dess, more than I’ve ever hurt. There’s a hole in my chest, and it keeps on hurting. Just let me hear you play the song you wrote for us, let me watch you write the lyrics. I can’t grow up without my sister. I CAN’T. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE,” They cried out in a mix of pain and anguish as one of their fingernails cracked on the shelter door, blood welling as the skin on their knuckles broke. They kept pounding, kept begging, and kept wailing until their throat bled and fingers couldn’t move, but there was still no answer from the pit below. The pain eventually overwhelmed them, a spattering of red covering the ground where they coughed and their fingers a mess of blood and shattered fingernail. If they had been in any less pain, they might’ve realized they were broken.

“Please, Doe-si-doh, don’t make Elly and I grow up alone. You’re enough to us Dess, forever,” Their voice was whisper quiet, not even a single teardrop falling as they folded against the grass wall that surrounded the shelter doors. Their slumped form barely shook with breath anymore, one eye shut while the other stared into the darkness of the forest that surrounded the shelter. Just barely, off in the distance, they thought they saw a pair of yellow and pink eyes slink around a tree.