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Chapter Text

Dave kept his eyes on the road, occasionally letting his eyes dart over to the guy sleeping peacefully in the passenger seat. Yawning, Dave pulled over into a gas station and filled up the nearly empty tank. Karkat stirred in his sleep, and Dave jumped, not wanting him to wake up. He sighed with relief. He just wanted to keep his boyfriend asleep until they reached Rose's and Kanaya's place in New York. Currently it was about 1:00 and they were nearly halfway there. After climbing back in the car, Dave started it up and pulled out. Beside him, there was a long and loud groan.
"AH, FUCK, HOW LONG WAS I ASLEEP?" Karkat moaned, stretching.
"We're nearly halfway there Karkles." Dave told him.
"AND YOU DROVE THE WHOLE TIME? PULL OVER." Karkat commanded.
"What? Why?"
"BECAUSE I'M DRIVING, DOUCHEMUFFIN." Dave complied, pulling into the curb. Karkat climbed awkwardly over Dave, taking the position of driver. "NOW ACTUALLY SLEEP. YOU'VE DRIVEN FOR HOURS." Dave reclined in the passenger seat, closing his eyes.

Chapter Text

It was December 4th, and Rose was very much enjoying her 22nd birthday. Kanaya leaned over and kissed Rose's cheek, handing her a gift wrapped in purple.
"I told you you don't have to get me anything!" Rose chided.

"Just Open The Package" Kanaya said, obviously excited for Rose to see the gift.

"Alright." Rose very carefully opened the present, trying not to tear the paper.

"Excuse Me Rose" Kanaya interjected, "But Is This Really Necessary To Open One Package"

"Yes." Rose answered curtly, working the gift out from its papery prison. Her eyes lit up. "What...where...where did you get this?"

"I Saw It Over In A Jewelry Store" Kanaya explained. "When I Saw Such A Beautiful Gem It Reminded Me Of You"

Rose blushed. "You didn't have to spend so much on me."

"I Wanted To Do It" Kanaya smiled. Rose held up the necklace. It was a simple design, really, a plain golden chain with a small amethyst gem, but it meant the world to Rose. To both of them, really. "Do You Want Help Putting It On"

"Yes, help would be appreciated." Rose smiled back.

Kanaya tittered and hooked the necklace around her girlfriend's neck. She finished by hugging Rose. "So How Was your Birthday This Year?"

"Wonderful." Rose responded, kissing Kanaya on the cheek.

Chapter Text

Nepeta drove up to Equius' mansion, beginning the long procession up his giant driveway. When she finally reached the house, Nepeta knocked on the door nervously.

"D--> Who is it?" Equius' deep, rumbling voice came faintly from behind the door. "D--> I w001d come to the door myself, but I am a little occupied."

":33 its nepeta!" She called.

"D--> Hello Miss Leijon. Is there any reason why you are stopping by?" Equius asked. "D--> Oh, my e%treme apologies. Please, come in." He stepped aside, letting Nepeta in.

":33 i was wondering if mew wanted to get dinner" Nepeta asked awkwardly, walking into the expansive entryway.

"D--> Of- of course. E%cuse me, I find myself in need of a towel." Equius climbed the stairs hurriedly and came back with a damp white towel.

":33 i know a great japawnese place" Nepeta suggested.

"D--> There is an e%quisite Italian restaurant off of 96." Equius supplied his input.

":33 but equihiss! italian is so expensive!" Nepeta whined.

"D--> I c001d pay, if you find it so e%pensive." Equius offered helpfully.

":33 but mew always pay fur efurything!"

"D--> Well, I have the money for it, unlike you and your lowb100d friends!" Equius pointed out rudely.

":33 my furiends are not 'lowb100ds'!" Nepeta retorted. ":33 besides, japawnese places are less crowded and cheaper!"

"D--> I guess we c001d have Japanese, though it isn't any cheaper than Italian."

":33 japawnese food is better though" Nepeta pointed out, to no avail.

"D--> I much...prefur...Italian."

Nepeta's face lit up for a moment at the cat pun, but went back to frowning. ":33 we could get italian and split the bill"

"D--> That sounds...a%eptable." Equius agreed.

":33 and then afurwards we can get ice cream!"

"D--> Of course. And I shall pay."

":33 equihiss no! i have enough money to pay fur ice cream!" Nepeta fumed. ":33 im paying!" Equius opened his mouth to protest, but Nepeta cut him off by saying, ":33 no! mew are not paying fur ice cream! hiss is my treat! cat is a direct order furrom the rouge of heart!"

"D--> I cannot disobey the Rouge of Heart, now can I? And I'm driving."

Nepeta giggled, glad Equius was playing along, and flounced out the door. ":33 h33 h33 h33! hurry up slowpoke! the mighty rouge of heart is not complete without the heir of void!"

Equius smiled to himself, glad to see Nepeta so happy, and headed out the door, grabbing his keys on the way out.

Chapter Text

"H9nestly, P9rrim, these teenagers have n9 respect f9r natural human rights." Kankri ranted, walking into Porrim's room.

"Kankri, co+uldn't this wait until after dinner?" Porrim asked, slightly miffed that Kankri barged in without warning.

"N9. I understand that y9u like y9ur space, 6ut it was an emergency and I th9ught y9u might be interested in this."

"O+h alright." Porrim sighed in resignation. "Hit me."

"G99d. The teenagers 9ver there were saying h9w w9men were n9 m9re than d9gs."

"WHAT?!" Porrim shouted, seriously pissed off. "We need to+ go+ do+wn there and give them a piece o+f o+ur minds!!"

"I h9leheartedly agree. They were very disrespectful and must change their ways. We will tell them in a n9n-vi9lent way, right?"

"O+f co+urse. Who+ do+ yo+u take me fo+r, Ampo+ra?" Porrim asked, walking out the door.

"#insulting9thers" Kankri muttered under his breath, following Porrim.

"So+ who+ was it?"

"S9me kids fr9m d9wnstairs. Apartment 9."

"Ah." Porrim said as she knocked on apartment nine's door. "Excuse me! Hello+? O+pen up!"

"Calm your tits!" A voice called from behind the door. "We're coming!"

Porrim's eyes flared. "N9w P9rrim, I kn9w they are 6eing vulgar (#sexualizingw9men #vulgarlanguage) 6ut we must remain p9lite." Kankri attempted to calm down his girlfriend.

"Quit it with the trigger warnings, Kanny." Porrim snapped back.

*One extremely long Kankri and Porrim team-up rant later that I really don't care to write and I seriously pity the receivers of said rant*

"I cann9t 6elieve them!" Kankri raged. "Y9u w9rked s9 hard 9n this sweater and they just uncaringly ripped it! (#vandalism #disregard9fpers9nal6el9ngings)"

"Tsk tsk Kanny, it's really an easy fix." Porrim pointed out.

"THAT ISN'T THE PRINCIPLE, P9RRIM!"

"DO+N'T YO+U RAISE YO+UR VO+ICE AT ME!" Porrim retorted.

"9h, my ap9l9gies (#v9iceraising #disregard9ffeelings) I g9t far t99 wrapped up in the situati9n and f9rg9t h9w y9u might feel." Kankri apologized frantically.

"Whatever. Co+me o+ver here."

"What? WHY?!" Kankri panicked.

"Just let me fix yo+ur sweater." Porrim commanded.

"It's fine the way it is!" Kankri whined.

"Shut up and let me help yo+u!"

"N999!!!!"

Chapter Text

"Rolal! Rolal! Rox! Where are you?" Jane called through the crowded bar.

"Janeey! Hey Jaen!" Roxy slurred, sidling over. "Hey bartender! Tow martinis for us!"

"And how will you pay for them?" The bartender asked. "You got a tab longer than the Great Wall of China!"

"Jaanneeyy. Jaaneey! Janey!" Roxy said, shaking Jane. "Could you pya the tab? Erm, pay."

"Rolal. I'm not paying your tab again." Jane told her drunk girlfriend firmly.

"But Janeyy!!" Roxy protested. "I needs my aclohol! Alcol. Alcohol."

"Rox, you're already drunk out of your mind. I'm not buying you anything else to drink!"

"Ugghhh fiiine!" Roxy turned toward the rest of the bar. "Who wants to buy-mmph!" Jane had slapped her hand over Roxy's mouth.

"Rolal! I am not letting drunk men buy you drinks to make you even more drunk!" Jane hissed in Roxy's ear. "We are leaving!"

"But Jne! I mean, Jane!! I don't wanna go!!"

"Roxy, we are leaving!"

"Janey, no!"

"Roxy, we. Are. Leaving. NOW." Jane snapped, in that tone of voice that only Jane could use that made everybody bend.

Roxy flinched. "But-let me finsh-my house is several blocks away-hang on-and I don't think I can actually drive. Plus, buses are dangerous places."

"You can stay at my place." Jane answered curtly. "I can drive."

"Tanks Janey!!" Roxy cheered. The two girls headed out to Jane's car and reached her house. 

"Guest room is over there, one of the drawers should have some of your stuff in there."

As soon as Roxy reached the room, she fell on the bed and went straight to sleep.

The next morning, Roxy got up and groaned. "Janeyy! My head hurts and it's too bright in here!"

"It's what you deserve." Jane said with venom, leaning into the room. "I have pancakes ready."

"Mmm thanks Janey." Roxy murmured, falling out of bed with a grunt.

After eating pancakes and getting some advil, Roxy stood up clumsily. "Hey Janey, I should get home. Muti and all that."

"You're still hungover." Jane pointed out.

"Not the point. I have cats to feed, Janey. Cats I say! Oww."

"Look, if you refuse to stay another day, I'll walk you home."

"Jane, you don't have to do that." Roxy negated.

"I know, but I will walk you home, whether you want me to or not!" Jane exclaimed, holding her ground.

Roxy threw her arms around Jane and whispered, "Thanks Janey."

Chapter Text

Karkat grumbled not too quietly to himself and walked over to start making breakfast. As he pulled two eggs out of the fridge, he realized that ther was a very faint "k-thik k-thik" sound coming from an adjoining room. He groaned, annoyed, and pulled open the door to the room the noise was originating from. 

"KANAYA, WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING UP AT THIS UNGODLY HOUR OF THE MORNING? I'M NOT EVEN FULLY AWAKE YET."

"Oh, Karkat" Kanaya responded calmly, fully engulfed in her sewing. "I Thought You Had Gone To Sleep"

"I DID AND I WOKE BACK UP AFTER MY ALARM WENT OFF." Karkat explained. "OH GOD, DID YOU SEW THROUGH THE ENTIRE FUCKING NIGHT? KANAYA, YOU FUCKING PROMISED ME YOU WOULDN'T DO THAT AGAIN."

"My Mistake. I Did Not Realize How Much Time Had Passed" She replied evenly. "A Client Needs A Dress By Friday"

"IT'S ONLY WEDNESDAY, YOU INSANE FUCKING SHITSPONGE. YOU HAVE TWO MORE DAYS DO FINISH A DRESS THAT IS NOW OVER HALF FINISHED."

"I Merely Wanted To Finish The Dress Early"

"LOOK, I DON'T HAVE NEARLY ENOUGH TIME BEFORE I HAVE TO GET TO THE SCHOOLHIVE RUMPUS RESPITE CALLED WORK. ACTUALLY SLEEP WHILE I'M GONE."

Kanaya just smiled, to anyone that didn't know her, it would be interpreted as a mocking one. Karkat just stalked out the door, continuing his grumbling. Kanaya headed up to her bedroom and laid down, but not before taking out her phone and texting,

GA: Have A Good Day At Work