Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Hanamaki rolls over on his bed, a groan escaping his lips. Reaching over with heavy arms, he blindly pats the table beside his bed. His fingers finally brush the edge of his phone, and he sluggishly pulls it up to eye level, squinting from the brightness. 5:02 Am. Wonderful. Why did he do this to himself again?

Setting his phone on his chest, he gazes up at the ceiling with a bored, yet very tired, expression. Maybe he shouldn’t go? It’s not like he knows anyone, hell, he doesn’t even know anyone in his own neighborhood. That’s one of the huge downsides to moving to a new area right before school starts. But, he supposes, it’s for the best. After everything his mother- and him, he guesses (but really, who cares about him?)- has been through, she deserves a new start. A new place to create a new life, without having to dread coming home. Without having to fear for her (or her son’s) life.

But, school meant meeting new people. School meant a chance to find friends, maybe, but what if he found no one? What if everyone turns against him? He really doesn’t need to be deemed a loner once again. His only reason for going, at this current moment in time that he can think of, is joining the volleyball team.

“Takahiro!” a voice calls out from outside his door. He choses to ignore it in favor of turning on his side, his phone slipping onto the mattress. He pulls the blanket over his head, eyes closing again a moment later. Maybe he can drift off, skip the first day, skip life…

“Takahiro!” the voice says again, his door flying open. He jumps in surprise, nearly tumbling out of the bed. His phone goes toppling off the edge, hitting the floor with a dull thud. After wrestling with the blanket, he finally throws it off himself, looking towards the door. Azumi Hanamaki stands there, hand on hip, key in her other hand, smug smirk plastered to her face.

He hisses in surprise. He had forgotten that she has a key for every room in the house.

“Hey, mother.” he grins, lifting a hand in a small wave. His mother huffs, rolling her steely gray eyes before she ventures farther into the room. She scowls at the clothes thrown about, but when she reaches the bed, she bends down so she’s eye-to-eye with her son.

“It’s 5:15. Doesn’t that volleyball club you want to join start at 6?” she asks, raising an eyebrow in question. Hanamaki groans, plopping back down on the bed, rolling away from his mother. She gasps in mock offense. She then grabs the back of his shirt, gently pulling him back towards her.

“Takahiro, I know this is a hard time, but-”

“I’m just tired, Mom. I’ll get ready, okay? No need to chastise me.”

“Takahiro,” Azumi starts, but Hanamaki quickly cuts her off by sitting up. He throws his legs over the side of the bed, hopping up.

“Alright, alright. I’m getting up,” he sighs. Shuffling to his closet, he retrieves his uniform and practice clothes, pulling it out of the closet. When he turns around, his mother is already gone, his door closed.

Sagging his shoulders, Hanamaki rests his forehead against the wall. This would be a long day.

“Wait, don’t forget your lunch!” Azumi calls, rushing to the door. She holds the bento out, waiting for her son to take it. He backtracks the last couple of steps he had previously taken, hesitating for only a moment before swiping it out of her hands.

“Thanks,” he smiles, nodding his head before he begins his journey to the school. It is a ten minute walk, and it’s currently 5:45. He has fifteen minutes, so that’s fine with him. Stuffing his hands into his pockets, only to freeze when they don’t get anywhere, he looks down. His practice pants has no pockets. What the fuck kind of design-

Stuffing his hands into his pants directly, he grumbles under his breath about stupid designs, continuing his walk.

The whole walk there, he’s alone.

Shifting the strap of his bag, Hanamaki nervously stares at the gym doors. He has four minutes and forty four seconds to set his bag down in the locker room and then head into the gym for morning practice. There, he’d meet the other first years, and the upperclassmen.

What if he doesn’t make the team? What if they don’t think he’s good enough? This is the only reason for him even getting out of bed- he has to make it.

Turning on his heel, he swiftly makes it to the locker room where he sets his bag down. He nods to the only other person in the room- some buff guy with spiky hair- and quickly retreats a moment later. He walks back to the door leading into the gym, shifting from foot to foot as his nerves start to get the best of him.

What if this is a mistake? What if he makes a fool of himself? What if everyone laughs at him-

“Hey,” a monotone voice asks. Hanamaki jumps, turning to look at who had just spoken. He was tall, but not by much, just about a centimeter taller. His unruly curly black hair looks very soft, his eyebrows were amazing honestly, and his bored expression was...interesting. Was this guy not nervous? “You okay?” mystery man with the eyebrows questions, “you seem a bit lost.”

A grin tugs at Hanamaki’s lips, “yeah, lost in your eyes.” he blurts out. He instantly tenses up, mentally scolding himself. He should really think before speaking. This guy is probably going to think he’s some sort of creep-

But no, mystery man actually laughs, turning his head away as he begins to laugh loudly. “Oh, god, that was great,” he wheezes. After about a minute of laughing, he finally composes himself. He then holds out a hand towards Hanamaki, smirk plastered to his face. “Matsukawa Issei; first year.”

Oh, good. He didn’t make a fool of himself in front of an upperclassman. “Hanamaki Takahiro; first year,” he replies, hesitantly reaching out to shake the guy's hand. “Nice too meet you,” he says politely, taking his hand away after a moment.

Matsukawa wrinkles his nose in distaste. “It’s nice to meet you as well, but there’s no need to be so polite.” he insists, clearing his throat. Matsukawa motions towards the gym doors, “so, Hanamaki-san, would you like to meet the other first years?”

Hanamaki stares at Matsukawa and his ridiculous eyebrows and very nice hair, tilting his head to the side slightly. Is Matsukawa coming up to talk to him some sort of sign that maybe he’d be okay here? Shrugging his shoulders, Hanamaki shifts his posture slightly to face the doors.

“Sure.”

Oikawa Tooru, Iwaizumi Hajime (who he vaguely remembers from the locker room),Yuda Kaneo, Shido Heisuke, and Sawauchi Motomu. His new teammates, the ones who he will be spending his time with for three whole years. They all seem okay, and they seem as if they won’t be too bad-

“You should eat lunch with us, Makki-chan!”

Ah, yes. Except that. “Um,” he says, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck. He isn’t sure how he feels about this nick name. He’s never had a nickname before. “If you stop calling me Makki-chan then may-”

Iwaizumi flat out laughs, shaking his head. “Sorry, Hanamaki, but he won’t give up. I’ve been stuck with ‘Iwa-chan’ for basically my whole life.”

Hanamaki shivers, suddenly feeling very sorry for Iwaizumi. “I’m so sorry you have to live with tha-”

“Oh, but I’m not alone anymore.” Iwaizumi grins, his expression sending another shiver down Hanamaki’s spine.

“Makki-chan! Iwa-chan!” Oikawa says, stomping his foot. “Let’s go to lunch!”

Hanamaki glances at Matsukawa, then Iwaizumi, then back at Oikawa. He’s never eaten lunch with someone else, either. This whole thing is just very weird to him. Are these guys suddenly his friends now? Do friends give each other nicknames and eat lunch together? The only friends he has ever had are ones that just talk to him in class. No one ever talked to him outside of the classroom.

“I’m not sure,” he says, glancing behind him, “I’m used to eating alone-”

“ What?! ” Oikawa gasps, placing a hand to his chest. Hanamaki jumps from the sudden loud noise, blinking in surprise. “You eat alone ?! That’s not allowed! Nope! Not in my book! I don’t know what your school-life was like in middle school-” Hanamaki flinches at his words, “-but from now on you get to eat with the amazing Oikawa-san!”

“Can’t I just eat with Matsukawa and Iwaizumi? I don’t know if I feel like suffering today-”

Oikawa gasps in offense, Iwaizumi snorts, and Matsukawa chuckles.

“I like you,” Matsukawa says, nodding his head.

Hanamaki can’t help the shocked expression that filters across his face.

“Hanamaki!” Someone calls out to him. He doesn’t bother to stop, not thinking much of it. No one would call him, he’s probably hearing things. He just wants a peaceful walk home-

“Hanamaki,” the voice says, closer now. Slowly turning around, he blinks in surprise. So he wasn’t imagining it?

“Oh, Matsukawa. Sorry, hi.” he says, nodding his head.

Matsukawa pants, hunched over with his hands on his knees. He quickly straightens up, smiling lazily. “So, you live this way?”

“No, I just like to walk in the complete opposite direction so that it takes me twice as long to get home.” Hanamaki deadpans, trying his hardest to keep a neutral face.

“Oh, wow. You’re so funny,” Matsukawa says, rolling his eyes. “Anyways, I asked because I live this way, too. Mind if I walk with you?”

Hanamaki blinks in surprise, but shrugs. “Why not?”

Matsukawa grins, quickly falling into step beside Hanamaki. They don’t really talk, instead they just enjoy the company of another person. Matsukawa begins to hum lightly under his breath, causing Hanamaki to laugh softly under his breath.

“You know, Mattsun , you look like a total asshole, but really you're like a giant teddy bear.”

Matsukawa scowls from the use of the nickname, stubbornly staring in front of him. “I’m not a teddy bear, if anything I’m a frog-”

“A frog?”

Matsukawa grins, “the best frog. I can ride a unicycle-”

“Oh my god,” hanamaki laughs, “I can’t believe this.”

“It’s better than a teddy bear.”

They both come to a stop, turning to face each other. “If you say so, Mattsun, if you say so.”

“I’m not sure how I feel about that nickname.”

“Yeah, well, Oikawa will probably never stop using it.”

Matsukawa pulls a look of pure disgust. “Anyways,” he clears his throat, “want to meet up here to walk to school together? At...say, 5:40?”

Hanamaki, for what feels like the hundredth time that day, blinks in surprise. “Sure,” he agrees easily, nodding his head once again. He then takes a step towards the direction he’s meant to go in, “See you tomorrow, Mattsun-kun.”

Matsukawa rolls his eyes, lifting his hand in a wave before he walks the other way.

“So, my dear son,” Azumi says, elbows on the table as she leans across it to get closer, “how was the first day of highschool?”

Hanamaki rolls his eyes at her, scooping some rice into his mouth. “You’re nosy.”

“I’m allowed to be nosy.”

Hanamaki stops eating, setting down his chopsticks. He tilts his head to the side, thinking over the whole day. It...actually wasn’t bad? Surprisingly. But, if he thinks long and hard about it, then he owes that to his three new friends. They are his friends, right? He’s pretty sure they are.

“It was actually good,” he confesses, surprising his mother. She sits back down in her chair, grinning as she waits for him to continue.

“I think, maybe, I actually made some friends? From the volleyball team. They’re nice.”

Azumi smiles softly, a fond look passing through her features. “I’m glad you have some friends.”

Hanamaki scowls, “don’t get gross on me.”

Azumi laughs, quickly wiping the back of her hand against her eyes, “I’m sorry, but I’m happy. You deserve friends, Takahiro, especially after what you’ve been through. You need people to be there for you.”

“Mom, I just met them, calm down,” he mumbles, awkwardly picking up his chopsticks to poke at his rice.

“Yeah, but I have a feeling that this is only the start of something great!” She exclaims, throwing her arms in the air dramatically.

Hanamaki rolls his eyes. “Whatever you say, mom.”

Hanamaki twirls his pencil with his fingers, staring down at his sketchbook. He is currently drawing a blank. Leaning back against the chair he’s sitting in, he stares at the ceiling. Nothing. Deciding that this is an issue for a later date, he sets the sketchbook aside and stands up, grabbing his phone.

Only to find two new messages.

[Unknown Number]: Makki-chan!!! This is the almighty Oikawa-san (๑>ᴗ<๑)

[Unknown Number]: Makki don’t ignore me thts rude ヾ(｡>﹏<｡)ﾉ

Hanamaki raises an eyebrow, about to text him back when another message pops up on his screen.

[Unknown Number]: Hey, it’s Iwaizumi. Sorry about him, apparently he took your phone during lunch so he could get your number. You might want to put a passcode on that thing, btw.

[Unknown Number]: yo it’s matsukawa B)

[Unknown Number]: sorry if this is weird, but Iwaizumi just sent me your number. Don’t know why I didn’t ask for it earlier.

Hanamaki chuckles, plopping down on his bed.

[Oikawa]: Makkiiiiiiiiiiii I miss youuuu pls text me (‘﹏*๑)

Hanamaki tries to stop himself, but before he knows it, he’s smiling like an idiot down at his phone.

Maybe his mom is right after all.

Chapter Text

“Makkkkkiiii-channnnn!” Oikawa calls out, running down the hallway. He skillfully slips by other students, diving under outstretched arms and dodging random bags that suddenly appear in his path. He gasps in offense as Hanamaki quickens his pace. Oikawa takes a deep breath, racing after his friend. Reaching out a hand, his fingers close around the strap of Hanamaki’s bag. He yanks back harshly, causing Hanamaki to squeak in surprise as he stumblers back.

“ Listen, ” Hanamaki says, eyes narrowed as he faces Oikawa. “Don’t rip this bag or I’ll slit your throat.”

They both crack a smile before laughing, both reaching out for the wall as they try to find some support to keep them up.

“I caught you, though! You try this everyday, but I told you I would drag you forcefully if needed!”

“You're right, you're right. I promised if you caught me I’d eat lunch with you.” He says, wrinkling his nose in distaste.

“Iwa-chan and Mattsun will be there!”

“They’re always there, though? That’s not really a surprise, Oikawa.”

“I know, but you don’t seem to like me that much, so I remind you every time,” Oikawa says honestly, causing Hanamaki to blink in surprise. These past few months...has he really been making Oikawa think like that?

“I like you, Oikawa. You’re my friend,” Hanamaki says, flashing him an honest smile.  

This time it’s Oikawa’s turn to blink in surprise. “Wh- but- I thought you only hung out with me because Iwa-chan and Mattsun were around as well?”

Hanamaki rolls his eyes, throwing his leg out to kick Oikawa’s ankle. He squawks in shock, hopping back a couple steps. “You’re an idiot. I hang out with you because I like you. You’re my friend, okay? I just don’t like eating lunch there.”

Realization dawns on Oikawa, his eyes growing wide. “Well, why didn’t you just say that was the problem?!”

“You guys like eating there.”

Oikawa sniffs, wiping fake tears from his eyes, “who knew Makki-chan cared so much…”

Hanamaki narrows his eyes, turning to walk away.

“Wait!” Oikawa laughs, grabbing the strap of his bag again, “why don’t you like the spot?”

Hanamaki sighs, shoulders sagging. Might as well get it over with. “I don’t like the crowds. There’s too many people, and you attract people like some sort of magnet, so that doubles the people.” he explains, shrugging as if it’s no big deal.

Oikawa instantly frowns. “I didn’t know you felt uncomfortable...I’m sor-”

“Don’t be.” Hanamaki says, rolling his eyes. He then throws an arm around Oikawa’s shoulders, grinning. “Let’s get to lunch, okay?”

The next day when Oikawa grabs the back of his school uniform, yanking him back to a stop, he leads him to the roof instead of the open field behind the school.

Hanamaki spikes the volleyball down on the other side, and right as his feet touch the ground he whirls around to Oikawa with a smile. The two high five, turning to smirk at Matsukawa and Iwaizumi on the other side of the net.

“Get rekted,” Hanamaki laughs. Matsukawa rolls his eyes, flipping him the bird before he turns to Iwaizumi.

“They think they’re all that because they got one point,” he mumbles.

“Yeah, they forgot about who’s winning.”

“Rude, Iwa-chan!”

“It’s not rude if it’s the truth!”

“Hey, stop bickering!” a third year calls out. The four first years all jump in surprise, calling out half-assed apologies before resuming their small practice match against one another.

Hanamaki stretches his hands above his head, yawning loudly before he swoops down to grab his bag. He waves goodbye to the other first years, making his way out of the locker room. Where he runs right into Iwaizumi.

“Oof- oh, Makki, I was just coming to look for you,” he says before grabbing his wrist, dragging him away.

“Wh- Iwaizumi-”

Iwaizumi cuts him off by yanking him down the stairs. Hanamaki nearly trips down one of the steps, but luckily Iwaizumi catches him. He decides to stay quiet, letting Iwaizumi drag him away to-...where ever it is they’re going.

When they reach the gate, he sees Matsukawa and Oikawa talking to one another. When Matsukawa finally sees them, he throws his arms in the air.

“It’s about time!” he exclaims.

“You two are so slow.” Oikawa sighs, shaking his head.

“Um, what’s happening-”

“We’re going to study together!” Oikawa explains, happily clapping his hands together.

“Oh,” Hanamaki shrugs, “sure.”

“Great! So, can we go to your house? We’ve all been to each others houses, but yours is the only one we haven't been to.” Oikawa says, shooting Hanamaki a pleading smile.

Hanamaki instantly scowls. This has to be a set up of some sorts- it’s obvious. Why do they want to go to his house so badly? He knows the moment he brings friends home, his mom will ge insane and probably throw a party and then most likely embarrass him and whip out the baby pictures and-

Hanamaki shivers. “Nope, nope, andddd nope.”

“Hana, come on,” Matsukawa says, pulling out the puppy dog eyes.

“Ugh, disgusting,” he mumbles, “fine. Whatever. Let's go.”

Oikawa and Matsukawa cheer. Iwaizumi grins. And Hanamaki realizes that Iwaizumi still hasn't let go of his wrist.

“Mom, I’m home,” he calls out as he opens his door, cringing as three chorus’ of ‘pardon the intrusion’ ring down the hallway.

His mother appears in five seconds flat, eyes wide, jaw dropped to the floor.

“Oh- I- Takahiro! You brought friends!” She says, eyes watering. “I- I can’t believe this- you finally have friends- people to bring home- oh my goodness- I’m so happy for you-”

Hanamaki groans, burying his face in his hands. He can hear Matsukawa and Oikawa chuckling behind him, and can practically feel Iwaizumi’s amused smile. What did he do to deserve this?

His mother quickly walks up the small group, “Azumi Hanamaki, nice to meet you all!” she smiles kindly, shaking all their hands. When they all introduce themselves, she leans over to Hanamaki, “my, my, Taka, you sure do have an eye for picking out the good looking ones.”

“Mom!” he exclaims, swatting her on the shoulder, the tips of his ears burning. This is why he didn’t want to bring them over.

Oikawa beams at her words, though. “You think I’m good looking? Thank you, Hanamaki-san!”

Azumi grins, but instead of talking again, she motions for them to follow her deeper into the house. Hanamaki trudges after the group, head down, dread hanging over him like a rain cloud. This would be a very interesting night.

“So,” Matsukawa asks, stretching out on Hanamaki’s bed like some kind of giant house cat. He grabs a pillow, hugging it to his chest as he looks at Hanamaki. “If you don’t mind me asking, does your dad usually not show up for dinner?”

Hanamaki instantly stiffens, quickly playing it off as him searching for his textbook. Of course, this doesn’t pass by Oikawa.

“He doesn’t, yeah.”

“Hm, I’m sorry. It would be weird for my family to eat without my dad, but it must be normal for you, right?” Iwaizumi says, stretching his legs out as he pulls his bag closer.

Hanamaki gulps, willing his hands to stop shaking. Because, no, he’s still not used to it. He used to not be able to eat until his father stumbled in to the room, drunk off his ass. They’d both get in trouble for eating without him-

It took so long for them to realize that it was okay to eat without him at the table.

“Mmhmm, normal.” he mumbles, picking up his text book.

“When does he come home?” Oikawa asks, voice soft. Hanamaki keeps his back turned to them, gritting his teeth. He really doesn’t want to talk about this.

Turning around, he flashes them a fake smile, “he doesn’t.”

“Wha-?” Matsukawa starts.

“My dad’s in jail, and he deserves to be stuck in there for the rest of his fucking life, okay? The bastard deserves to rot in there.” he snaps, gripping his textbook so hard his knuckles turn white. There they have it. He’s related to some criminal.

The three stare at him, all wearing different expressions. Matsukawa looks guilty for starting the conversation, Iwaizumi looks shocked, and Oikawa looks confused.

“Jail? What did he d-?

“Don’t we need to study?” Hanamaki says, settling down on the carpet. He pulls his homework out, taking a shaky breath. “It’s not important, okay? So...just forget it. Please,” he whispers.

“Makki, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t of as-”

“It’s fine, you guys didn’t know.” He says, pulling his homework closer to him.

The next day Hanamaki wakes up late. He doesn’t mean to, it just happens. He flies out of bed and dresses in record time, throwing his bag over his shoulder as he races down the stairs. He throws a quick goodbye to his mother, panting as he runs down the street.

He doesn’t expect Matsukawa to be there. He’s ten minutes late, why would he wait? But, of course, the bastard catches him off guard when he turns around, lifting a hand to wave. “You’re late,” he states.

“You waited?” Hanamaki says instead of replying to the statement.

Matsukawa rolls his eyes as he begins to walk, “why do you think I would go without you? I’m not an asshole.”

Hanamaki opens his mouth, then closes it. He doesn’t really know what to say to that, honestly.

“Hey, by the way,” Matsukawa says, staring straight ahead, “we don’t care. About your father, it doesn’t change how we think of you.”

Eye growing wide, Hanamaki freezes where he is. He completely stops walking,  furrowing his eyebrows in thought. “Um, thanks,” he mumbles, nervously looking up at Matsukawa.

Matsukawa laughs softly, reaching out to gently punch Hanamaki’s shoulder, “no problem.”

Iwaizumi’s head shoots back, a loud smack echoing across the gym. The third year who served the ball gasps, guilt swarming in their eyes as the volleyball drops to the ground, revealing Iwaizumi with a now bleeding nose. “I’m so sorr-”

“Iwa-chan!” Oikawa gasps, rushing over to his friend. Hanamaki and Matsukawa stop what they’re doing, quickly racing to their friend’s side as well.

“Are you okay?”

“Let's get him to the nurse-”

“How many fingers am I holding up??”

“Yes, I am. That’s not necessary. And two,” Iwaizumi says, waving his arms for them to give him space. 

The third year jogs up to them, eyes wide, “hey, Iwaizumi-san, I’m really sorry. I can take you to the nurse’s offic-”

“That’s really not nece-”

“We’ll take him,” Oikawa says, grabbing one of Iwaizumi’s arms. Matsukawa grabs the other arm, and Hanamaki nods in agreement.

“Oh, um, okay.” The third year says in surprise, nodding his head. “I really am sorry, though…”

“It’s fine, you didn’t mean to,” Iwaizumi says politely, cursing as he’s dragged away by his friends.

“Iwaizumi, catch me!” Hanamaki screeches, running forwards. He jumps on to Iwaizumi’s back without warning, causing him to stumble forward. He quickly grabs Hanamaki’s thighs so he wouldn’t go falling backwards.

“Wha-”

“MATTSUN!” Oikawa calls out, charging after him. He jumps, clinging to Matsukawa’s back.

“What is happen-” Matsukawa starts.

“ Race!” Hanamaki says, throwing one of his arms out. Iwaizumi and Matsukawa glance at each other, both wearing matching looks of confusion.

“Mattsun, we can’t lose! The losers pay for dinner!”

That’s all the prompting they needed. Iwaizumi bolts, carrying Hanamaki with little to no effort, leaving Matsukawa and Oikawa behind. Hanamaki laughs, wrapping his arms around Iwaizumi’s neck gently.

They end up winning, much to Matsukawa and Oikawa’s dismay.

Chapter Text

Hanamaki yawns, nervously grabbing the strap of his bag. He makes his way down the stairs, an uneasy feeling blossoming in his chest.

That’s when he turns the corner, eyes landing on his mother. He stares her, sitting at the table reading a book. She looks normal, yes, but looking closer he can see how stiff her posture is, how her hands shake slightly.

“Mom?” he questions, taking a hesitant step forward. “You okay?”

She jumps, the book tumbling from her grasp. She blinks in surprise before smiling gently, stumbling to her feet. She grabs the bento she made for him, handing it to him. When he gets closer, he can see how tight her smile is.

So it’s one of those days.

Taking the bento, he slips it into his bag, smiling softly. “Thanks, mom,” he mumbles, hesitating for only a moment before he takes that last step forward, wrapping his mother into a tight hug. “Have a good time at work, okay? I love you,” he whispers. He doesn’t let go until she hugs back.

“Have a  good day at school,” she says back, nodding her head, “And I love you as well.”

Hanamaki smiles again, making his way towards the door. They both have those days where everything is just too much. It’s only to be expected, so they both try their best to support each other when these things happen.

Stepping out of the house, he squints at the brightness of the morning. He thought the nervousness would be gone by now, seeing as how he knows his mother will be alright, but it’s still there.

It’s just one of those days.

Sighing heavily, Hanamaki taps his fingers against the desk. It’s been a very long day, and all he wants is to go to lunch and hide from every prying eye. He usually doesn’t mind crowds, but today he doesn’t feel like bothering with them. His mind is muddled with dark thoughts and worries for his mother- he’s not in the right mindset for school.

He jumps as the bell rings, nearly throwing his textbook to the ground. Grabbing his stuff and carelessly tossing it into his bag, he makes a beeline towards the door.

Running right into Oikawa.

“Makki!” he exclaims happily, beaming. “You made it easy to catch you today.”

“Yeah, yeah,whatever, can we go?” he says in a rush, nervously looking around the hallway. He hates feeling like this, and he hates that he never can pinpoint what days will be ‘those days.’

Oikawa frowns, but decides not to dwell on it. Instead, he turns around, leading the way towards the roof with ease. Hanamaki, without thinking, reaches out, grabbing the back of Oikawa’s uniform. He grips the fabric, head low as he follows his friend.

Oikawa doesn’t comment on it, deciding to keep his concern to himself. When they finally get to the roof, he hears a relieved sigh escape Hanamaki’s lips. He wants to ask, really badly, but instead he plasters on a bright smile, placing a hand to his chest, “iwa-chan, Mattsun, I hope I didn’t take too long. I know how horrible it is to be away from me-”

“It was the best five minutes of my life,” Iwaizumi says, Matsukawa nodding in agreement.

Oikawa gasps in offense, but really he isn’t too offended, because the small smile that fights it's way  onto Hanamaki’s face makes it okay.

Iwaizumi twirls the volleyball in his hands, head tilted to the side. “Hey, does Hanamaki seem a bit...jumpy today?”

Matsukawa hums as he takes a sip of his water, lifting his shoulders into a shrug. “I haven’t noticed anything.”

“I have, he seemed really nervous at lunch,” Oikawa pipes up, appearing behind them like some sort of ninja. They both jump as the sudden appearance.

“Jesus, Oikawa,” Iwaizumi says, “where did you even come from?”

“Your dreams,” he instantly replies. Matsukawa rolls his eyes.

“Anyways, didn’t we have an issue at hand here?” Matsukawa says, setting his water bottle aside.

“Yes, Makki has been acting strange all day!” Oikawa says, placing his hands on his hips, “I’m really worried about him.”

“Hanamaki is strong, whatever’s wrong, it’ll be okay. And if he wanted us to know if something's up, then he would’ve told us by now,” Iwaizumi says, gently punching Oikawa’s shoulder. “No need to worry, alright?”

Oikawa frowns, looking out at the court where Hanamaki is talking to one of the other first years. “Alright,” he mutters.

Hanamaki smiles at Yuda as he talks. He didn’t know the other first year that well, but they seemed to get along.  He sort of lost track of the conversation, though, seeing as how he is now just nodding along with a smile. He really isn’t feeling it today.

“So, can you set for me?” Yuda asks, handing over a volleyball. Hanamaki stiffens up, blinking slowly. He’s not a setter, he’s a wing spiker, and plus, Oikawa is a setter and so is that other third year-

“Can’t you ask Oikawa?”

“I could, yeah, but I rather not. You can set, so why not? You being able to set could help in games, so you might as well strengthen that skill since you have it.”

Hanamaki awkwardly rubs the back of his neck, shuffling his feet, “um, alright.”

That’s how he found himself setting for Yuda. He wasn’t the best, but the skill was enough just in case something happened to the regular setter in a game.

“So,” Yuda says after a while, handing the volleyball back to Hanamaki to set, “it’s my dad's birthday soon, and I still haven't gotten him a gift”

Hanamaki frowns, knowing that he’s just trying to make small talk. It was kind of a random topic, but at least it’s something.

“What does he like?”

“I’m not sure,” Yuda says, humming in thought, “maybe a new book...what does your dad like?”

Hanamaki drops the volleyball in his hands, opening his mouth to answer. But nothing comes out. He just stares at Yuda with wide eyes, trying to come up with something to say. He hasn’t trained for this conversation. Does he lie? Does he just say they’re divorced? Does he just say his dad is not in thepicture? Maybe he should say his dad is in jail? Or does his tell the truth?

“Hanamaki? Are you okay?” Yuda asks, concern evident in his voice.

This shouldn’t be the thing to push him over the edge but is it , and suddenly he can’t breathe and yuda looks seriously concerned and-

“Sorry, Yuda, I’m going to need to borrow Makki for a moment!” Oikawa’s voice says, his cold hands wrapping around Hanamaki’s arm.

Yuda makes a look of pure confusion. “Oh, okay…?”

And then Hanamaki is being lead across the gym, gently being pushed outside. He greedily tries to breathe in the fresh air, but he’s hyperventilating so it’s not working . Everytime he tries to take a deep breath, it’s as if his lungs close up, refusing access. He doesn’t know what to do and he’s shaking and he doesn’t know why that conversation set him off so badly but-

“Mattsun, grab his water bottle, please. Iwa-chan, don’t crowd him,” Oikawa’s voice says, forcing Hanamaki to sit down against the wall.

Hanamaki places a hand to his chest, squeezing his eyes closed. He knows he probably looks very pathetic right now, but that’s the least of his worries. This isn’t his first attack, he knows he needs to calm down, but it's always so hard .

“Hana- Takahiro, you need to breathe,” Oikawa whispers, placing a hand to his shoulder. Hanamaki frantically looks up, panicked eyes meeting Oikawa’s calm ones. “In, out,” he whispers, demonstrating.

Hanamaki closes his eyes again, tears threatening to spill any moment. He takes a deep breath, then lets it out, and repeats.

“Just like that, okay?” Oikawa says, taking the water bottle Matsukawa hands over to him. When Hanamaki finally calms down enough, he hands the bottle over. With shaking hands, Hanamaki hesitantly takes it, taking a small sip.

Iwaizumi takes the opportunity to sit down beside Hanamaki, reaching out to gently rub his back, “you better now?” Not trusting his voice, Hanamaki just nods his head.

He really fucking screwed up. Now they know he’s pathetic and they know he deals with these stupid attacks and-

“Let’s get you home,” Matsukawa says, smiling softly, “can you walk?”

Hanamaki frowns, nodding his head again. Matsukawa only grins, “well, oh well, I’m still going to carry you.” he insists, turning around. Before Hanamaki can protest, Iwaizumi forces him to stand up, and with Oikawa’s help, they get Hanamaki on Matsukawa’s back.

Matsukawa gently sets Hanamaki down, frowning slightly, “are you going to be okay?”

He nods silently, nervously looking away. “T-thanks,” he finally whispers, biting down on his bottom lip. “I’m sorry for being a burden.”

Iwaizumi scoffs, softly hitting Hanamaki’s head, “never think that.”

That’s when the front door opens, Azumi standing in the doorway with wide eyes. One look, and she can figure out what happened.

“Thank you so much for taking care of my son,” she says, grabbing Hanamaki’s sleeve, “I would invite you to stay for dinner, but I don’t think I should tonight.”

“That’s okay!” Oikawa grins.

“We understand,” Iwaizumi smiles politely.

Matsukawa only nods his head to show he understands.

After Azumi pulls her son inside, she instantly frets over him. He lets her, knowing that she needs to do this to feel like she’s doing something right.

“Thanks, mom,” he whispers. She smiles, ruffling his hair.

“Your friends helped, I’m guessing? So they know?”

Hanamaki nods for the nth time that night.

“They’re good people, Takahiro. They won’t just abandon you for something like that.”

“I hope you’re right,” Hanamaki sighs.

The next day, nothing changes. Matsukawa meets him at their meeting spot, no questions tumbling from his lips. Oikawa chases him down at lunch. Iwaizumi beats him at arm wrestling again.

It’s normal. And for that, he owes them everything.

Chapter Text

Oikawa grabs his fluffy green blanket, throwing it over his shoulders and standing up on his couch. He poses, hands on hips as he flips his hair out of his face, sending a wink to the three on the floor.

“I’m disgusted,” Matsukawa sighs, grabbing the remote. He switches the channel from the alien documentary- receiving a gasp of betrayal- and keeps switching channels until they stumble on Spirited Away.

“This is much better,” Hanamaki smiles, wrapping the blanket around him tighter against his body. Iwaizumi hums in agreement, resting his back against the couch.

“Guyssss,” Oikawa whines, plopping down on to the couch cushions, “you were supposed to humor me…”

“There’s no way any of us would ever call you ‘Alien King.’” Iwaizumi mumbles, shoveling some popcorn into his mouth. Oikawa sniffs dramatically, pulling the blanket up until it covers his face, blocking his view of the tv.

Hanamaki nervously looks at him. He can’t really be that upset over something so silly, right? Sighing, he stands up, facing Oikawa.

“Makki,” Matsukawa whispers, eyes wide, “love yourself.”

“Don’t do it,” Iwaizumi adds.

Hanamaki clears his throat, promptly ignoring the two, “Oikawa-san,” he says dramatically. Oikawa peeks out from the covers, eyes wide as he looks up at Hanamaki. “You are…” he trails off, getting down on one knee dramatically, holding a hand out, “the one and only Alien King, the best Alien King I have ever met, and I wish to serve you.”

Oikawa’s smile turns giddy as he sits up, clearing his throat as he takes Hanamaki’s hand, “Oh, my dear friend, I don’t wish for you to serve me, I only wish for your loyal faith to the Alien religion.”

Hanamaki tries to keep a straight face, placing his other hand to his chest, “anything for you, my ki-”

He’s promptly cut off as a pillow is smashed against his face. He squawks in surprise, head whipping to the side to look at Iwaizumi with wide eyes. He then shoots a betrayed look at Matsukawa as he begins to laugh. Grabbing the closet pillow, he hits Matsukawa in the face with as much force as he can muster.

Oikawa quickly gets up from the couch, taking his own pillow and smacking Matsukawa with it as well.

The next thing they know, it’s a full on war. Oikawa and Iwaizumi hide behind the couch, Matsukawa and Hanamaki behind the arm chair, both teams waiting for the right moment.

“I have a plan,” Hanamaki whispers, grabbing a cup full of tea that one of them were drinking earlier.

“Isn’t that going a bit overboard?” Matsukawa asks.

Hanamaki grins, eyes shining as he shrugs. Matsukawa was never one to say no to Hanamaki’s antics, anyways. Hanamaki hops up from behind the arm chair, going to the couch and leaning over the edge. He’s met with two wide stares before he tilts the cup over, pouring the liquid right into their faces.

Many drinks split and much food smashed into faces later, the four quickly take turns showering before they settle back down in the living room. Iwaizumi, having stole the remote, puts on Godzilla to no one’s surprise.

Oikawa and Iwaizumi sit on the couch, both on opposite ends, their legs meeting in the middle. It’s not strange, seeing as how this is how they’d sit at any other sleepover. Matsukawa and Hanamaki are on the floor, leaning against the couch as they stare at the screen.

It doesn’t take long for Hanamaki to pass out, head plopping onto Matsukawa’s shoulder. He instantly stiffens, ears burning as he glances at his friend. Hanamaki’s sleeping face is peaceful, his chest rising and falling softly with each breath. His mouth is open just a little, his eyelashes brushing his cheeks.

Matsukawa isn’t sure why his heart suddenly skips a beat, but he knows it can’t be good.

“Oh, did Makki fall asleep?” Oikawa questions, pulling Matsukawa out of his inner turmoil.

“Yeah, he did,” Matsukawa says, clearing his throat.

“Do you want to move him to the spare bedroom? Or, are we all just sleeping out here?”

Matsukawa glances back at Hanamaki, mentally screaming as Hanamaki reaches his hand out, grabbing the fabric of his shirt. “I think he’s comfortable where he is,” he mumbles, not really wanting to move Hanamaki.

“Well, if you’re sure,” Oikawa chirps, settling back down

Matsukawa only hums. And instead of watching the rest of the movie, he continues to watch Hanamaki sleep peacefully.

Iwaizumi watches as the end credits roll, eyes heavy. Glancing at the time tells him it’s two in the morning. Running a hand through his hair with a sigh, he turns the tv off, turning to glance at Oikawa.

His head is resting against the couch cushion, arms crossed in front of him with his legs still tangled with Iwaizumi’s. His eyes are closed gently, the soft rise and fall of his chest telling Iwaizumi that he is, indeed, asleep. His hair is already messy, since his head is resting against the couch. Smiling to himself, Iwaizumi looks over the edge to see Matsukawa also asleep, his head resting on top of Hanamaki’s.

It’s unbelievably cute and right as the thought crosses his mind, he blinks in confusion. He’s never really thought of his friends as cute , or good looking, or anything like that-

Shaking his head, Iwaizumi scowls. It’s too early in the morning to be thinking of things like this. So, ignoring the weird thoughts drifting around in his head, he sinks back into the couch, letting his eyes slide close.

He’d think about it in morning after he wakes up.

(But, hopefully, the thoughts wouldn’t even be there when he wakes up.)

Oikawa gently shakes Matsukawa up, smiling as he groans, eyes opening a tad bit. “Hey, you actually don’t even look any different! You look tired, but that’s normal!” he receives a small flick to the forehead for that.

Oikawa only laughs, standing up, “my mom made pancakes, so come on!”

Matsukawa looks at him with narrowed eyes, noticing that his hair doesn’t look as perfect as it normally does. He’s wearing black and green plaid pajama bottoms, and his shirt is green with an alien holding a peace sign. It’s so Oikawa, and so cute and-

He hates that he thinks it’s cute. But he does like seeing Oikawa without him looking his best, because it shows how close they are now, because Oikawa trusts them to not make fun of him for any flaw he actually has.

(Of course they’d tease him, but never would they truly make fun of something he’s insecure about. They all find it weird that he’s so insecure of his looks, seeing as how he looks the way he does, but they all choose not to question him on it.)

“Are you just going to stare at me?” Oikawa asks, and Matsukawa doesn’t miss the way a small blush spreads across his face. Oikawa quickly looks away, huffing, “I guess just come into the kitchen when you’re fully awake,” he says, retreating back into the room.

Matsukawa sighs, blinking in confusion. He didn’t think he was starting that long. Was he too obvious? No, he can easily blame it on how tired he is.

Sighing, Matsukawa finally stands, running a hand through his own messy hair. Whatever he’s feeling will disappear before night, right?

Chapter Text

Hanamaki sits on the bench, legs crossed as he lazily scrolls through instagram. He chuckles under his breath as he pauses to admire a picture of Iwaizumi that Matsukawa had posted ten minutes ago, where Iwaizumi is shown to be very focused on some arcade game. He quickly likes the photo without much thought, smiling as he admires the picture for another couple seconds before scrolling again.

He didn’t know Iwaizumi and Matsukawa were hanging out. And, well, they probably didn’t know he was hanging out with Oikawa today. It doesn’t matter, really, because they’re all friends and they can easily hang out in pairs.

It’s just always more fun when they’re all together.

Hanamaki pauses, eyebrows furrowing together. What a weird thought to have. Is it strange that the best part of his day is hanging out with them?

Nah.

“Makki,” Oikawa sing songs, stepping out of the changing room.

Hanamaki is immediately horrified.

Oikawa has a fan club. He has girls (and sometimes guys) flocking him like he’s their source of light at school. People admire him, look up to him, praise him for his skills.

And, right at this very moment, Hanamaki wishes he could snap a photo and show the world how horrible Oikawa’s fashion sense is just to ruin that perfect image. Honestly, how does he even think that’s a good outfit?

“Oikawa…” Hanamaki sighs, slowly taking a moment to process the outfit. Galaxy skinny jeans with a yellow t-shirt that has pineapples of all things on them. Not only that, though, no. He chose to put on red converse that don’t even match.

“What are you doing to me?” Hanamaki moans in distress, shaking his head sadly. “Please tell me this is a joke.”

“Huh? But I think it looks good?”

“Oikawa, who dresses you when you don’t wear your uniform?”

Oikawa frowns in confusion. “I mean, Iwa-chan usually comes over early and throws clothes at me to wear, I’m just too lazy to pick out anything else.”

Hanamaki sighs, shaking his head. Bless every god in existence for Iwaizumi Hajime.

“You’re not getting that,” Hanamaki insists, standing up.

“ What? But I like it!”

“Okay, you can get them, but you can’t wear them together. With the pineapple shirt, you have some black jeans at home and I guess that could work. With the galaxy pants…” He trails off, face morphing into one of disgust. Who would even want those pants? (Even though they do hug Oikawa’s legs nicely, but he’d never say that out loud.) “I guess a black or purple shirt could work well with them, I’m not sure. I just know that a pineapple shirt doesn’t go with galaxy print. Oh, and the shoes? You’re not getting them. You have enough pairs at home.”

“Makki, you are not my mother!”

“But I am your friend and I care deeply about you, so please, don’t embarrass yourself this way.”

Oikawa huffs, stubbornly crossing his arms over his chest. He looks away, a look of hurt in his gaze as he just stands there, waiting for Hanamaki to speak.

Hanamaki, after seven minutes and thirty six seconds of silence, caves. “I’ll buy you something from the bakery down the road if you just hurry the fuck up, okay? And only if you don’t get the shoes.”

Oikawa pretends to ponder over this for a moment, beaming a moment later. “Deal!” he calls, skipping back into the changing room. But not before Hanamaki takes a quick photo of his outfit.

Matsukawa watches as Iwaizumi studies the hockey puck in front of him, violently hitting it as it glides into his space. With a lazy flick of his wrist, Matsukawa hits the puck, watching as it swiftly slides across the table, slamming into the goal.

“How the fuck do you do that?!” Iwaizumi groans, retrieving the puck from the slot in the machine. He places it back on the table, sticking his tongue out as he narrows his eyes.

(And if Matsukawa thinks it looks cute, well, he keeps the comment to himself.)

“You’re just too tense to realize how easy this game is,” Matsukawa says, and with another simple move he scores another point.

“I can’t believe this!” Iwaizumi exclaims, throwing his hands up.

“Does the magnificent Iwaizumi admit defeat? Does the dashing Matsukawa Issei finally win against him?”

Iwaizumi scowls. “Never,” he snaps, throwing his all into the game.

When the game finishes, Iwaizumi falls to his knees, eyes wide. “I lost,” he whispers, “i’ve never lost at a game.”

Matsukawa can’t help but laugh, “oh god, Makki is going to hate me for beating you.”

“Wait, you can’t tell anyone about this-”

Matsukawa quickly snaps a photo of Iwaizumi’s distressed state, sending it to Hanamaki. Iwaizumi shouts in protest, but Matsukawa turns around as he realizes Hanamaki had sent him something about five minutes ago.

“Holy shit,” Matsukawa wheezes, staring at the picture of pouting Oikawa in the ugliest, most mismatched outfit he’s ever seen.

“Matsukawa, I swear to go-” Iwaizumi is cut off as Matsukawa shows him the screen. It takes five seconds before Iwaizumi snorts, covering his mouth with his hand as he tries to keep his laughter at bay.

“Wha- What was he even thinking? Oh god, that’s amazing.”

Matsukawa grins, wishing that he could capture the image of a smiling and laughing Iwaizumi to his phone, but knowing he’d probably die if he did so, he just saves it to memory. It’s too precious to forget, anyways.

“Ah, well anyways,” Matsukawa says, “I believe you owe me coffee, since I beat you.”

Iwaizumi instantly scowls at the reminder, rolling his eyes, “alright, let’s go.”

“Iwa-channn!” Oikawa squeals, waving both arms in the air as Matsukawa and Iwaizumi enter the cafe. Hanamaki looks up in surprise, looking behind him to see their two friends.

“You hurt me, Oikawa.” Matsukawa sniffles, placing a hand to his chest. “It’s okay, though, I can see when I’m not wanted.”

Oikawa’s eyes grow wide, seriously thinking that he’s hurt Matsukawa. He quickly stands up, lunging forward to grab Matsukawa’s arm. “I’m so sorry, Mattsun! I swear I like you, and I want you here, please don’t go!”

Hanamaki raises an amused eyebrow, clearing his throat so he doesn’t burst out laughing. Iwaizumi nods hello to Makki, sliding into Oikawa’s seat.

“Wow, I didn’t know you cared so much,” Matsukawa sniffles, keeping up the act.

“I do! I swear I do!”

“Then buy me coffee.”

Oikawa eagerly nods, slipping away to the line without complaint.

“Wasn’t I supposed to get you coffee?” Iwaizumi questions, taking a sip from Oikawa’s drink. None of them bat an eye at that, though.

“You can get it next time, it's just fun to see him freak out.” He replies, pulling up a chair to plop down beside Hanamaki. In response, Hanamaki instantly kicks his legs up, resting them on Matsukawa’s lap.

It’s funny, really, how they can start the day alone or in pairs, but by the end of it, they somehow always gravitate towards one another.

Hanamaki thinks it’s strange, but then again, they are a pretty close group of friends. So there’s no reason to overthink it.

Chapter Text

Hanamaki is a reasonable man. He does things when needed. He helps others when needed. He does everything when it’s needed.

But as he walks passed the kitchen on his way to school and finds his mother hunched over a photo album, sobbing quietly, he finds that he can’t do what’s needed this time. He knows he should step into the room, slide onto the couch next to her and pull her into a hug...but he can’t. He knows she has bad days where she just needs to cry, and a hug would help but...he’s already running late. And he knows she’d only feel guilty for keeping him from practice.

So he opens the door carefully, slipping out of the house. He meets Matsukawa at the meeting spot, tight smile on his face as he nods his head in a hello. He can see the way Matsukawa frowns, see the way he opens his mouth to question him, but when he shakes his head and smiles back, Hanamaki silently thanks everything in existence.

He’s not sure he could explain without breaking down.

Hanamaki slides down the wall at lunch, staring at nothing. The others are all talking about who knows what, but he’s not listening. He can’t get the image of his mother sobbing out of his head. Is there even anything he can do?

No, there’s not. Because he’s useless.

“God damnit,” he hisses out loud, glaring at his food.

“Uh, you okay?” Matsukawa asks, raising an eyebrow. Hanamaki jumps in surprise, looking up with wide eyes.

“Huh? Yeah, yeah, sorry.”

The three all look at him with disbelieving stares.

“I forgot my math sheet at home,” he explains, sighing heavily. “It’s the third time this month and I’m going to get hell for it.”

Before they can call him out on lying, he pushes his food towards them, then hops to his feet. With a half-assed goodbye, he slips away.

He gets halfway down the hallway when a hand grabs his upper arm, gently pulling him to the side. He squeaks in surprise, jerking his head to look at whoever it is. His eyes land on Iwaizumi, who’s looking very worried and confused.

“Are you okay?”

Hanamaki swallows past the lump in his throat, blinking slowly. “Yeah.”

“Are you sure? Is it one of those days?”

“No, Iwaizumi, I’m fine.”

Iwaizumi frowns, furrowing his eyebrows in concern. He then finally drops Hanamaki’s arm, taking a step back. “Alright,  if you’re sure.”

Hanamaki nods, offering up a weak smile. He then turns around, bolting down the hallway.

Hanamaki stands in the gym, holding the volleyball tightly in his hands. He's off to the side, staring at nothing at thoughts whirl around in his head. Just thinking of his mother brings tears to his eyes, because she's such a nice woman. The best mother anyone could ask for. She didn't deserve any of the things that happened to her.

“Hey, Hanamaki.” Oikawa grins, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. Hanamaki looks at his friend, willing for the tears in his eyes to disappear- but of course Oikawa notices. “What’s wrong?” He instantly asks, moving his arm to place both hands on his shoulders.

Hanamaki angrily rubs his eyes, looking away. “What are you talking about, I’m fine.” He laughs weakly, but his voice cracking gives him away.

Oikawa frowns, furrowing his eyebrows together. “Alright. Well, just know that you don’t need to be scared of talking about things. It always help if you talk about it.” He mumbles before smiling, turning to walk away.

Scared? Was he scared?

Thinking back to his mom, the reason why she was so distraught. His father, always looming in the shadows even though he's finally out of the picture. Of him screaming, his fist raising-

He thinks about what his friends would do if they found out. Would they stop being his friend?

(Because who wants someone broken in their life?)

Would they judge him for having a father like that?

(Matsukawa said they didn't think any less of him for having a father in jail. But still, he can't help but worry.)

Scared? Yes, he's scared. Terrified , really.

He doesn't want them to find out the ugly truth of his past.

Dropping the volleyball in his hands, he walks up to Yuda, politely asking to train with him.

Hanamaki takes his time changing, slowly pulling his favorite black hoodie over his head. He sinks into the warmth, taking a moment to calm himself down.

He has no idea what to do when he gets home. Does he act like he saw nothing? Does he sit down and comfort her? Hug her?

“Makkiiii!” Oikawa sing songs, grabbing the back of his hood. He gently yanks him back, swiping both their bags on the way out as he drags Hanamaki behind him.

Hanamaki squawks, nearly tripping over his feet as he stumbles after Oikawa. “Gah, Oikawa , le- urk- let go!”

Oikawa laughs cheerfully as they exit into the night air. He finally releases Hanamaki, sending him stumbling. He throws his hands out,catching himself with the railing.

“What the hell! I could've died!”

“But you didn't. Now come on!” Oikawa says, reaching out to grab his hand. Hanamaki has only a second to feel his heart skip a beat before Oikawa is racing down the steps.

Once they reach the bottom of the stairs, Hanamaki is too busy staring at their hands to see Matsukawa and Iwaizumi waiting for them at the gate. When they do reach the gate, he's so out of it that Matsukawa has to snap his fingers in his face.

“Makki, we’re going to the bakery.”

Hanamaki blinks, the words slowly processing in his mind. He didn't even realize Oikawa had dropped his hand.

“Huh? Oh, okay.”

His misses their concerned stares as he goes back to thinking about Oikawa holding his hand.

(Hey, at least now he's not thinking of his mother, right?)

But. But why . Why is this affecting him so much? It wasn't even that they were truly holding hands, Oikawa was just holding it. Nothing special.

Right at the thought crosses his mind, Oikawa reaches out again, grabbing his hand again. He actually laces their fingers together this time, smiling widely before turning around to walk away.

Hanamaki doesn't have time to question why his face turns red, because in the next moment, Oikawa is running off, dragging Hanamaki along.

Hanamaki sits on the curb, nibbling on his creampuff. Iwaizumi and Oikawa are arguing over something, him and Matsukawa watching with slight amusement. After about five minutes, Hanamaki reaches over and grabs Matsukawa’s wrist. He twists it so his palm is facing upwards, placing the rest of his creampuffs on his palm.

“Makki, wh-”

“Not hungry,” he mumbles, smiling a little when Matsukawa gives him a weird look.

“Okay, no. Now I know something's wrong.”

“Why won't you talk to us?” Iwaizumi asks suddenly, turning away from his conversation with Oikawa.

There are now three pairs of eyes on him, waiting for him to speak. He stiffens under their gazes, nervously looking away. Without thinking, he lifts his hand and bites down hard on his finger. It helps distract him, because now he can focus on the pain and not his nerves.

“Makki!” Oikawa squeaks in surprise, lunging forward to smack his hand away from his mouth.

“S-sorry,” Hanamaki chokes out, looking away. “I can't tell you guys what happened, b-but… just… My mom...and something with my dad.”

Just thinking about it brings a wave of tears to his eyes. He doesn't dare meet their gazes, holding his breath as he waits for them to speak.

“You don't need to explain any further,” Iwaizumi finally says. A warm hand gently touches his shoulder, and that's when he finally breaks.

Hanamaki sucks in a deep breath, looking up with a broken expression. He then reaches forward, clinging to the person in front of him.

(He's pretty sure it's Oikawa, but it might be Iwaizumi. He knows it's not Matsukawa, since he's sitting next to him. But he doesn't care who’s arms are wrapped tightly around him as he sobs,because he finds comfort in them anyways.)

When Hanamaki gets home, waving goodbye to his friends with a small wave and a thankful expression, he slips in through the door and goes straight up to his mother. She doesn't have time to say anything before Hanamaki reaches forward, pulling her into a hug. 

Chapter Text

“I can’t believe first year is over,” Oikawa says, looking around the pool. Matsukawa scowls, watching as some girls walk by. They’re obviously talking about Oikawa, seeing as how they’re pointing and whispering to one another.

He’s not sure, but he’s pretty sure he maybe, just a little, might be, a tiny bit jealous. Just a little.

“It went by in a blur,” Hanamaki agrees, throwing his arm around Oikawa’s shoulder. Matsukawa isn’t sure, but he’s positive Hanamaki just glared at one of the girls.

But it’s probably his imagination

Iwaizumi steps up, holding their bag of towels and other supplies. “Oikawa, you’re not allowed to go until you put sunscreen on.”

“You’re not my mother, Iwa-chan!”

Iwaizumi only rolls his eye, leading the small group towards a free table. He places the bag down, pulling out the sunscreen. He squeezes some on his hand, then grabs Oikawa’s face, yanking him forward. A small squeak escapes his lips as Iwaizumi places some sunscreen on his forehead, then rough yet strong hands rub in the lotion.

A small blush spreads across Oikawa’s face, and he jerks way with a cough, “I can do it myself!” He huffs, swiping the bottle from Iwaizumi’s hands.

Hanamaki is quick to take Oikawa’s spot when he turns around, grinning from ear to ear. “I wouldn’t mind if you put sunscreen on me.”

Iwaizumi stares at him in confusion, but much to all their surprise, he complies.

~~~~~

Oikawa floats lazily on his back, eyes closed as he takes advantage of the coolness seeping into his skin. The sun beams down harshly, the reason for them coming here in the first place.

Suddenly something smashes against his stomach, sending him under the water. He squawks once he breaks through the surface, sputtering in surprise. His eyes land on Matsukawa, sly grin on his face.

“Yo,” he nods, “you just looked way too peaceful.”

“You’re a bully!” Oikawa insists, violently splashing him. Matsukawa shakes his head, droplets flinging out of his hair.

“Oh, it’s on,” he grins, splashing him back.

Throughout their small batlle, Hanamaki somehow gets involved. Something about coming over to tell them it’s time for lunch, only to get a face full of water the moment he got next to Oikawa.

It’s basically world war three, all of them splashing each other violently. Hanamaki left after a moment, getting pool noodles so he could fight to the death for the throne to the water kingdom.

“You’re all idiots,” Iwaizumi deadpans as he swims up to them, taking away their pool noodles.

“Why do you ruin our fun?” Oikawa whines, only to get whacked over the head with a noodle after that comment. He whines the whole way out of the pool, stopping to dry off his hair.

Now, if the other three stopped to watch him dry off, watching droplets slowly trail down his body and drip to the floor-- well, none of them outed each other.

~~~~~

Matsukawa stretches out, letting his eyes close. A nap is always nice, especially if it’s a nice day like today. The warm sun is beating down on him, and he is laying down in the shade-- it’s perfect, really.

All at once, the peace dies as three different pair of arms wrap around him. He sputters in surprise, eyes snapping open as he’s thrown into the pool. He coughs as he reaches the surface, glaring up at his three friends.

“Sorry, but this is an outing for us to hang out, there is no sleeping allowed!” Oikawa huffs, flipping his hair dramatically. Matsukawa only narrows his eyes.

“I could kill you,” he hisses. Oikawa’s eyes grow wide, face paling.

He turns tail and runs, Matsukawa climbing out of the pool and bolting after him, leaving Hanamaki and Iwaizumi to watch with slight amusement

~~~~~

By the end of the day, Matsukawa does somehow end up falling asleep. Iwaizumi is the one that has to pick him up, carrying him back to the Oikawa household. They all instantly fall asleep once they reach Oikawa’s room, not bothering to shower or even change out of their swimsuits.

“I don’t want to go to second year,” Hanamaki whines, stretching out on Matsukawa’s carpet. The fan blows directly on him, providing him with some coolness.

“Stop hogging the fan,” Iwaizumi chides, gently poking Hanamaki’s side with his foot. He squeaks, curling in on himself.

Iwaizumi freezes. Then he slowly pokes Hanamaki’s side again, causing him to giggle. He throws a hand over his mouth, eyes growing wide.

“Iwaizumi, I know what you’re thinking, and plea--” Hanamaki is promptly ignored as Iwaizumi launches himself off the bed, attacking Hanamaki. Loud laughter echoes around the room, Hanamaki wheezing and begging Iwaizumi to let him go.

Matsukawa and Oikawa enter with drinks, watching as Iwaizumi mercilessly runs his hands over Hanamaki’s body. It’s look a bit too intimate, but neither of them comment on it. Instead, they calmly sit down on the bed and watch as Hanamaki is tortured.

“Alright,” Oikawa says, clearing his throat. “We are going to be senpais soon! We must be responsible, and kind --”

“Yeah, you’ve already failed,” Hanamaki says without missing a beat. Oikawa’s jaw instantly drops, and he places a hand over his chest in offense.

“How dare --”

“You’re not very responsible, either,” Iwaizumi says, looking at his nails casually.

“Iwa-chan!”

Matsukawa laughs, leaning his back against the bed. “Guys, come on,” He starts, and Oikawa’s eyes light up in the hopes that he’ll be stood up for. “There was no need to point out the obvious.”

Oikawa gasps, turning his back to them. He folds his arms across his chest, lip jutting out into a pout. “Stupid Makki, stupid Mattsun, stupid Iwa-chan! Who needs them anyways? I don’t. What do they know anyways? I’m a total catch!”

“Um, you do know we’re right here?”

Oikawa raises his voice, obviously wanting to be heard. “Who needs a brute as a friend anyways! And who needs someone with half their face being eyebrows, and who needs someone who has pink hair--”

“You’re really bad at insulting people.”

Oikawa whines, sagging his shoulders. “Why are my friends so mean to meee.”

“Ah, you know it’s because we love you,” Iwaizumi says, rolling his eyes. Then he freezes. “Um, I--”

Oikawa whirls around, eyes shining. He clasps his hands together, lip wobbling dramatically. “Iwa-chan loves me!”

Iwaizumi groans. “What have I done?”

Iwaizumi settles down, placing the drinks in the middle of the small circle. “Now, we can’t stay up too late, since school starts tom--”

“Are you our mother?” Matsukawa asks, causing Iwaizumi to scowl.

“So, what exactly are we going to be doing?” Hanamaki asks, grabbing one of the drinks. He opens it, taking a small sip.

“Truth or dare!” Oikawa instantly says, giddy smile on his face.

(And, well, he honestly looks really excited about this, and none of them have the heart to say no when he looks that happy).

Oikawa beams when they all agree, but he lightly smacks Iwaizumi’s arm as he mumbles something about the game being for eight year olds. Iwaizumi takes this as his cue to move, forcing Hanamaki to sit beside Oikawa so he can sit beside Matsukawa.

“I feel so blessed that you’d want to sit next to me,” Matsukawa sniffs.

Iwaizumi scowls, rolling his eyes. “Let’s just start the damn game.”

Oikawa gladly volunteers to start, instantly turning to Matsukawa. “Truth or dare?”

He narrows his eyes suspiciously. “Dare.”

A gleam shines in Oikawa’s eyes. “Sit in Iwa-chan’s lap for the rest of the game.”

Iwaizumi sputters in response, not sure if he heard that right. Doesn’t this game start out mellow? Don’t they work up towards the weird dares? Why is Oikawa jumping right into the awkward ones?

Matsukawa, on the other hand, only grins. He lifts himself off the ground with no complaint, moving to plop himself down in Iwaizumi’s lap. He throws his arms around Iwaizumi’s neck for added effect, fluttering his eyelashes. “Hold me, Hajime-kun, with your big, strong, arms--”

Iwaizumi pinches his side hard. “Shut up.”

“Oh, feisty, I like it--”

“Matsukawa, please ,” Iwaizumi groans, looking up at the ceiling. What did he ever do to deserve this?

By the end of the game, Iwaizumi’s legs are asleep, Hanamaki isn't wearing pants, Oikawa has a unibrow drawn in sharpie, and Matsukawa fell asleep.

“You can't move him!” Oikawa gasps.

“That would be a sin , just look how peaceful he looks!” Hanamaki adds.

Iwaizumi only sighs, accepting his fate. He carefully moves to lean his back against the bed, being very slow in his movements so that he wouldn't make Matsukawa wake up. Hanamaki and Oikawa clean up their mess, both moving towards the bed.

“You guys just wanted the bed,” Iwaizumi accuses, absentmindedly running a hand through Matsukawa’s curls without much thought. Oikawa’s eyes watch the movement with slight amusement, and he quickly slips into the bed.

“Oh, Iwa-chan caught us.”

Hanamaki snickers, crawling into the other side of the bed. “Oh, well,” he says, snuggling into the warmth of the covers.

As the lamp by Oikawa’s bed flicks off, enveloping the room into darkness, Iwaizumj realizes that they may be just a little too old to be sharing the bed. But he doesn't bring it up, doesn't question the act, because he's not really one to talk when his friend is sitting in his lap .

Laughing to himself, Iwaizumi shakes his head. I'm fucked, aren't I?

Chapter Text

Oikawa smiles kindly at the three new first years. He stands with the current second years and the third years, glancing at his three friends. Iwaizumi is studying the new first years with the rest, Hanamaki looks bored, and Matsukawa is probably sleeping standing up.

“Um, I’m Watari Shinji...libero,” the shortest of the three says, deciding that he should start since the other two aren’t speaking up.

Their captain smiles in encouragement, looking at the other two. He motions for them to go on and introduce themselves.

“Kyoutani Kentarou….wing spiker,” the next one says, scowl on his face as he glares at the ground.

Well, he looks like a happy person.

The last of the three steps forward, bowing slightly. “Yahaba Shigeru, setter!”

Oikawa instantly stiffens up, smile tightening. He feels Hanamaki confused stare, but he promptly ignores it as he tries to push down the feeling stirring up in his chest.

We’re going to need another setter eventually, right? It’s good that he showed up now….right?

(But what if he takes your spot?)

He won’t. I worked hard.

(You don’t know if he’s talented or not.)

But I know that I’m talented.

(But are you good enough?)

Oikawa is out of the gym, sprinting, right as the bell rings for first period.

Hanamaki frowns, looking after the brunette. He seemed fine until the new first years showed up. Did he know one of them, and not like them? Or did this go deeper than that?

“Don’t worry,” iwaizumi says, startling him. He nearly drops his bag, squeaking as he stumbles forward in surprise.

“Jesus, Iwaizumi!”

His friend only laughs, looking after Oikawa. “Seriously, don’t worry about it. He’ll be fine,”

Hanamaki frowns again, tilting his head slightly. “And if he’s not?”

Iwaizumi raises an eyebrow. “If he’s not what?”

“If he’s not fine?”

Iwaizumi frowns, eyebrows furrowing. “Then that’s when we start to worry.”

Matsukawa hums around his food, watching Oikawa poke at his own food. He’s been like this since this morning. He narrows his eyes as Oikawa glares at his food, pushing it away with a sigh. Silently, Matsukawa reaches over, pushing the food back.

Looking up in surprise, Oikawa stares at Matsukawa with wide eyes.

“Eat,” he says, taking another bite of his own food.

Iwaizumi shows up after he says that, settling down beside his childhood friend. Hanamaki is next, panting as an apology for being late slips passed his lips. He plops down beside Matsukawa, stretching his legs out as he glances around the group.

He’s about to ask about the weird look on Oikawa’s face, but then it disappears as Oikawa reaches out, picking up his food. Hanamaki really wants to ask why he looks as if he wants to cry, but he decides to keep the question to himself, digging into his own lunch.

Matsukawa smiles just a little as Oikawa takes a bite, and he mentally pats himself on the back.

Iwaizumi sighs as Oikawa paces around his bedroom.

“Sit down and study, idiot,” he sighs, head tilting towards his friend.

“I can’t!” Oikawa groans, stopping as he faces Iwaizumi. “Do you want to go out back and practice some more?”

“We just practiced for a whole hour and a half.”

Oikawa clenches his hands into fists, looking to the side. “It’s not enough.”

“You mean you’re not enough?”

Oikawa inhales sharply, eyes closing. “I...I wasn’t..”

Iwaizumi sighs, pushing his textbook to the side. Hopping to his feet, he walks up to his best friend. Without a word, he gently places both hands on Oikawa’s cheeks, forcing the brunette to look at him.

“Yahaba isn’t going to steal your spot.”

Tears instantly threaten to fall, and Oikawa sniffs pathetically. “You don’t know that,” he whispers. Iwaizumi chuckles softly, gently knocking their foreheads together.

“You’re the best setter I know, Oikawa, okay?”

“But, Tobio-c--”

“The best. Did I fucking stutter?”

Oikawa cracks a small smile, fully meeting Iwaizumi’s gaze now. “Who knew Iwa-chan could be so nice?”

“Ah, there’s the asshole I know and--” He promptly cuts himself off, clearing his throat as he makes his way towards the bed. “So, studying?”

Oikawa looks a little confused, but he rolls his eyes dramatically as he collapses onto the bed.

He's not here to steal your spot.

Oikawa stares at the first year, gulping nervously. There's basically stars in his eyes, his shoulders stiff as he stares at his senpai. They have a small staring contest before Yahaba anxiously looks down.

“I-I understand if it's too much to ask, since you're so busy--”

“No.” It slips out before he can stop himself, and he instantly barrels on. He won't be able to do this if he doesn't do it now. “No, I'm not too busy. I would love to practice with you, and to help you.”

The shock in Yahaba’s eyes is enough to make Oikawa feel guilty. Is it really that surprising that he'd help someone?

(“ Yes.” He hears his friends voices in his head, and he can't help but smile a little.)

“Let's start tomorrow, yeah?”

Yahaba eagerly nods, bowing as he shouts out a thank you. Before Oikawa can say anything back, he's sprinting across the gym, skidding to a stop by Watari and talking while jumping up and down.

Oikawa feels a smile spread across his face, and he quickly turns around to focus on his own training.

“Where's Oikawa?” Matsukawa asks, looking around for the tall brunette.

“He told me he was going home to study,” Iwaizumi says.

“He told me he needed to help his mom…” Hanamaki says, furrowing his eyebrows together.

They all go silent, standing in their spot as they take a moment to study each other. “Should we…?” Matsukawa leaves the question hanging.

“This is the first time he's done this since middle school, and it's not necessarily bad to stay after every once and awhile, I suppose…”

Hanamaki nervously looks over his shoulder, for some reason hoping Oikawa would be there. “I'm worried about him,” he admits, blinking in surprise as he says it. The other two seem surprised as well. He doesn't normally voice his concerns about people unless it's about his mother. Which means, in short, he only voices his concerns when he really cares for the person.

He feels his cheeks burn, and he awkwardly refuses to meet their eyes. “He's my friend, okay? Of course I'm worried!” He makes a show of huffing in annoyance, stomping ahead of both of them. Iwaizumi and Matsukawa look at each other, eyebrows raised.

“... He'll be alright.” Iwaizumi declares, tearing his gaze away from Matsukawa with some difficulty. He then begins walking again, catching up with Hanamaki.

Well, Matsukawa thinks, moving to fall into step beside Hanamaki, I sure hope he will be.

Chapter Text

Iwaizumi may not seem like the kind of guy to notice things, but he is. Sure, he’s not the best at reading people on court like Oikawa. And he isn’t like Hanamaki who can read people off court. The difference is that he can read people on and off the court. But it’s only the small things.

Like how Oikawa lingers behind after they all clean up the gym, eyes wide and teeth digging into his bottom lip as he thinks of staying behind again. How Hanamaki’s gaze is cast downwards, shoulders high as he tries to hide himself on a bad day. How Matsukawa sometimes forgets his lunch, waving his hand and telling them he’s already eaten, even though it’s obvious that he’s starving and wants something to eat.

He notices how Hanamaki smiles, just a little, when Oikawa grabs his hand and drags him through the hallway, up to the roof where they eat lunch. The blush Matsukawa wears-- the one that’s barely there and you have to be looking to see it-- when Iwaizumi splits his lunch in half, handing half over to him. How Oikawa’s eyes widen in surprise when one, or all three, of them stay behind to practice just a little longer with him.

This small list seems to grow as time rolls on.

Oikawa’s hands tightening around the volleyball he’s holding when he’s teaching Yahaba, the tight-lipped smile he wears. Iwaizumi can tell he’s trying to be nice, trying to not repeat what happened in middle school, but his insecurities are so so obvious when one choses to actually look. He notices how Hanamaki starts to avoid physical contact, his ears staining red when Oikawa touches his wrist, neck flushing when Matsukawa stands a bit too close, his eyes nervously looking away when Iwaizumi leans in to ask him something. Iwaizumi is...hopeful, to say the least, that this is a sign.

But, a sign for what ? Even he isn’t sure what this all means.

He does know that his heart skips a beat when Matsukawa smiles softly, eyes crinkling as he thanks Iwaizumi for sharing his food. How he finds himself smiling more when Oikawa talks about his passions, because god he’s just so beautiful-- and that’s not a normal thought to think of about your best friend. He feels his heart stutter, the sight of a blushing Hanamaki nervously wringing his fingers when one of them gets too close...it’s too much for his fragile heart.

The question is, why? He knows he’s hopelessly in love with Oikawa,  he’s accepted that ever since he first thought Oikawa was ‘cute.’ Now, though, Hanamaki and Matsukawa? He’s not even sure if this is possible, but the signs are all there. They obviously feel something as well and-

And-- it’s just all so confusing .

Grumbling to himself, Iwaizumi turns to Kyoutani, trying to get him to act politely and practice with the team. Behind him, he can hear Oikawa telling Yahaba what to do, giving him pointers and actually teaching him. A glance to the other side of the gym has him jumping, finding that Hanamaki is looking at him with a fond smile. Being caught, however, causes him to jump and jerkily turn back towards Matsukawa and Watari, mumbling something to the two of them.

Iwaizumi sighs heavily, turning back to Kyoutani. He’s going to be the one who’ll have to figure out this whole mess, isn’t he? Not that he minds, really. Unless...unless he’s wrong and this is nothing? What if he’s thinking too much into this? What if--

Shaking his head, he focuses back on Kyoutani. Only, the first year is already gone, stalking across the gym and leaving a whole twenty minutes early. Rolling his eyes in defeat, he turns and jogs up to Yuda, who is practicing with some third years, and politely asks to practice with them.

It’s a good distraction from the storm in his head. The ball smacking against his hand, slamming to the floor with an echo. It makes him feel proud, a little bit more confident.

He can figure this out. He will figure this out.

Iwaizumi furrows his eyebrows, scrolling through his phone. He casually ignores the group chat with the others, and instead focuses on his research. It’s really important research, so it’s all good.

He ends up typing into Google, because Google knows all, asking if it’s normal to maybe, possibly, like more than one person. He’s shocked when the page blows up with many links, and he casually clicks on a Yahoo link. He scrolls, surprised to find the term he’s been looking for.

He moves from that question, to doing research on polygamy and polyamorous relationships. He stops looking at polygamy after a while, and focuses on polyamorous relationships instead. He doesn’t realize that he’s basically on edge, eyes wide as he learns all these new things, until his phone slips out of his hands and lands on his pillow.

He blinks in surprise, looking at his alarm clock. That prompts a groan to escape his lips, and he grabs his phone and moves to connect it to the charger. He glances at the group chat, but he knows if he actually reads the messages, he'll want to reply. He needs sleep, though, and it’s already so late. So that isn’t an option.

Sinking into the mattress, Iwaizumi lets his eyes slip close. He still has so many questions, but he knows now. He knows that it’s okay to like them all, to feel overwhelming happiness when he’s with them. It’s okay to...to be in a relationship. With all of them. Maybe it’s not okay with everyone in the world...but...it’s not uncommon. It’s not strange. They can...they can do this.

It’s hard to wrap his mind around, really. But...it sends comfort through his bones and makes sleeping easier. In the morning, he’ll have to deal with how to approach this mess, and how to even talk to them. But again, he’s going to have to leave that for the next day, or if not the morning, then some time soon.

Maybe. If he doesn’t chicken out.

Chapter Text

Matsukawa may not always be the best person when it comes to wanting to talk to someone. He sleeps a lot, he forgets his lunch a lot, and he enjoys sitting on the floor and doing nothing.

But he still notices things. He still watches out for his friends, and listens as best as he can when it's necessary. He cares, so he's willing to not sleep if that means listening to one of them, or just watching out for them.

Which is why he notices a couple things throughout the week. It starts during morning practice. Iwaizumi goes to spike, but it's completely off and the volleyball flies by his hand, thumping to the ground. He apologizes, waving off Oikawa's concern and goes to spike again.

It happens again. This time, however, he doesn't use all his strength. Yuda blocks him easily, and Watari doesn't have enough time to save the offending ball. Again, Iwaizumi waves it off and tries again.

He completely misses the ball, a second too late. It brushes by his fingers before dropping to the floor uselessly. The coach decides to finally step in, tugging Iwaizumi away off the court because obviously he has some things on his mind and he needs a clear head if he's to play properly.

It's cute, really, the way he plops down on the bench and crosses his arms, pouting as he watches the others practice.

Once that thought crosses his mind, Matsukawa curses under his breath and turns back to what's happening in front of him. Apparently, he's not the only one distracted by Iwaizumi's cuteness, seeing as how both Hanamaki and Oikawa are smiling over at him.

Matsukawa takes it into his own hands, clearing his throat and reminding them that they're in the middle of practice. Hanamaki squeaks, dancing back a few feet so he can glare at his friend. Oikawa simply scoffs, exclaiming that he'd never get distracted. He is captain, after all.

"Try being a less shitty captain," Matsukawa says, hiding his smile as Oikawa gasps in offense, placing a hand over his heart.

"How rude, Mattsun! I haven't done anything wrong in my life ever-"

"Sounds fake but okay," Hanamaki coughs, grinning at Oikawa. The captain simply huffs, and with no hesitation, he throws the volleyball in the air and spikes it into Matsukawa's face.

"I can't believe he retaliated," Hanamaki wheezes at lunch, patting Matsukawa's back.

Matsukawa glares, solemnly touching his bruised nose. "He's so rude."

"I'm right here!" Oikawa snaps, jutting his lip out into a pout. "And this is a warning, okay? So, next time -"

"I can't believe you're taking after Iwaizumi," Hanamaki sighs, wiping a fake tear away.

"Huh?"

"Resorting to violence! What a bad, bad influence on our poor captain!"

"Iwa-chan is not- "

"Obviously you are," Matsukawa laughs, turning to Iwaizumi. "Do you give him lessons during your free ti- Iwaizumi?" He says, tilting his head. He reaches out, gently shaking Iwaizumi's arm. "Iwaizumi?"

Iwaizumi jumps, tearing his gaze away from where he was staring at nothing. "Huh?"

"Are you okay?" Matsukawa questions, frowning with concern. Iwaizumi never spaces out this badly.

"Mm," Iwaizumi mumbles, nibbling on his food. "'M fine."

Matsukawa glances at Oikawa and Hanamaki, both of them looking worried and confused. He raises an eyebrow in question, only to receive two shrugs.

"I don't know," Oikawa mouths, looking back at Iwaizumi. He pulls his bottom lip in between his teeth, biting down on it nervously.

"Iwa-chan? Is there something on your mind?"

Iwaizumi looks startled at the question, and he blinks a couple times. A lazy smile filters across his face. "Nothing, sorry. Just thinking of something."

"You know you can talk to us, right? If you need to?” Hanamaki says.

Iwaizumi hums, nodding his head. "Yeah, I know."

Matsukawa quickly ties his shoes, eyes narrowed as he stands back up and slings his bag over his shoulder. Hanamaki and Iwaizumi are waiting by the gate already, but Oikawa sure is taking his sweet time in getting ready.

“Yo, Hanger-san.”

Oikawa turns around, raising an eyebrow. He's still in his workout clothes. The only things he has taken off are his shoes and kneepads. Which is very suspicious.

“Yes, Mattsun?” He asks, smiling as he fiddles with his shirt.

Matsukawa frowns. “You're taking too long. Hana and Iwa are waiting for us.”

“Oh!” Oikawa gasps, smiling sheepishly. “Did I forget to mention that I have to head straight home? Mom needs help with dinner, so you guys go ahead, okay?”

“But you never help with cooking.”

Oikawa’s smile twitches, his eyes narrowing slightly. Normal people wouldn't notice these small changes, but Matsukawa does. He sees right through him.

He knows Oikawa is lying. And Oikawa knows that he knows that he’s lying.

“Goodbye, Mattsun, I'll see you in the morning.”

Matsukawa sighs, running a tired hand through his hair. There's nothing he can do in this situation, unless it's throwing the setter over his shoulder and stomping away. He considers it for a moment, but that would result in Oikawa pounding his fists against Matsukawa’s fragile back.

Matsukawa isn't ready for that.

“Alright,” Matsukawa mumbles, lifting his hand in a wave as he slips out of the changing room.

It's not like there's any danger yet. He doesn't stay every single night, just every once in awhile. So there's no reason to worry. At least, not yet.

Iwaizumi sits in front of Hanamaki, watching as he furiously scribbles something on his paper. They all know how hard Hanamaki works in his classes, even if he doesn’t seem like the kind of person to actually study and try to get good grades.

The problem, however, is that--

“God fucking damnit all to hell! ” Hanamaki hisses, tossing his pencil at his math sheet. The pencil lands on it’s eraser, and it hops off the page and lands by Matsukawa.

--he gets very confused. Very easily.

Iwaizumi watches as Matsukawa’s eyes soften, his hand instantly reaching out to pat Hanamaki’s shoulder. “Hey, we all have our weaknesses in school. Math happens to be yours, and that’s okay, you just gotta give it time to sink in.”

“Yeah,” Hanamaki scoffs, swiping his pencil back up. “Math, science, history...everything, basically. I suck.”

Matsukawa gasps in offense, placing a hand to his heart. He turns to Iwaizumi, snapping the shorter male out of his staring. “Did you hear that, Iwaizumi?”

“Uh, yes?”

“Makki thinks he sucks!”

“Well, I mean, I could give him something to suck and we could test it out,” Iwaizumi says without thinking.

Hanamaki blinks. Matsukawa’s jaw drops. Iwaizumi flushes red.

“Oh my god,” Matsukawa wheezes, slumping against the table and laughing against it. Hanamaki just sputters out some random nonsense, grabbing his math papers and hiding his face with them. Iwaiuzmi simply looks down at his own work, blinking in surprise.

He did not mean to say that. Out loud, at least.

“I’ll take you up on that offer someday,” Hanamaki finally says, calming himself down. He then winks and sends finger guns towards Iwaizumi.

Iwaizumi simply rolls his eyes, turning his full attention back to studying.

Yeah, he really needs to figure out how to fix this whole mess and get everything out in the open.

Chapter Text

Oikawa breathes deeply, opening his eyes. His gaze narrows in on the other side of the court, his focus right where Watari wouldn’t be able to receive. He flicks his gaze to the other side, however, knowing that there’s a fifty-fifty chance of them falling for it.

Throwing the volleyball in the air, he jumps and slams his palm against it. It goes flying, and they realize he’s tricked them a moment too late. With a loud smack, the volleyball hits the floor, earning his team a point. Not only a point, but the winning point.

Hanamaki cheers, turning to throw himself at Oikawa. He barely has time to catch his friend, stumbling back a couple feet. Even he can’t stop the small laugh that escapes his lips.

“Good job, Oikawa!” Hanamaki says, smiling widely. On the other side of the court, Iwaizumi, Matsukawa, Watari and Yuda all groan as they get ready to run their extra laps. Losers have to take the punishment, after all.

Oikawa beams at his team, but only receives compliments from Yahaba and Hanamaki. Kyoutani just glares, grumbling under his breath. Oikawa doesn’t let that discourage him, though, because the third years who were watching all walk up and comment on how well he did.

Oikawa can’t help the giant smile that takes over his face.

All that extra practice is paying off.

“Iwaizumi,” Hanamaki says, leaning forward to poke him in the forehead. He startles, his chopsticks slipping from his fingers as he looks up. “Are you okay?”

“Oh,” Iwaizumi says, clearing his throat. Hanamaki’s eyes are wide, concern evident as he leans closer. Iwaizumi coughs, ducking his head to hide his blush. God, why the fuck does Hanamaki has to be so cute? “Yeah, just thinking over some things.”

“Well, you’ve been thinking over whatever is stewing up in your brain for weeks now,” Matsukawa comments, his voice muffled from the food Iwaizumi had given him at the beginning of lunch. Oikawa scowls, swatting at Matsukawa and scolding him about talking with food in his mouth. Matsukawa simply scoffs and ignores him.

“Yeah, well, I need to think about it more.” Iwaizumi says, picking up his fallen chopsticks. Hanamaki huffs, crossing his arms and looking away.

“Why won’t you talk to us?”

Iwaizumi nearly drops his chopsticks again, lifting his gaze to look at Oikawa. He doesn’t look mad or like he’s about scold him, he simply looks sad.

“You always talk about communication and reaching out, but aren’t you going back on your word? We’re worried about you.”

Iwaizumi wants to retort and say that they’re worried about him, too, but he locks that thought away for another day. “I promise I’ll be fine, okay? And I do want to talk to you guys,” he says, earning three different looks of surprise.

“I just, you know, need to figure out how I’m going to word it.”

Matsukawa raises an eyebrow. “It must be pretty important if it’s taking you weeks to figure it out.”

Iwaizumi offers up a sheepish smile, lifting his shoulders into a shrug. He’s not wrong.

Hanamaki lingers by the doorway, hand resting on the cold metal of the door. He lets the other members pass by, smiling at Matsukawa and Iwaizumi and telling them to go on ahead. They look confused for a moment until they see Oikawa lingering by the supply closet.

“He’s been doing this for weeks now,” Hanamaki whispers, “he’s going to hurt himself at this rate.”

They both nod, instantly understanding the plan. Matsukawa, without thinking, places a hand to Iwaizumi’s upper back and gently ushers him forward. Hanamaki doesn’t miss the way Iwaizumi’s ears turn pink, his head ducking forward to try and hide the blush.

He stores that image away, tilting his head to the side. For now, he needs to talk to Oikawa. Stepping over to where he’s lingering in the storage room, Hanamaki reaches out and gently tugs on his uniform. Oikawa jumps, turning around with raised eyebrows.

“Yes, Makki?”

“We’re going to my place to study tonight.”

Oikawa frowns. “I can’t to--”

“You’re not staying behind again.”

Oikawa grits his teeth, anger flashing through his features. He looks away, his fingers curling tightly around his shirt, wrinkling it as he tugs harshly on it. “I need to,” he whispers.

Hanamaki sighs, really wishing he could smack the stubbornness out of Oikawa. Instead, though, he hesitantly reaches out and grabs one of his hands, tugging it away from his shirt. “You do know that you’re good enough, right?”

A flash of shock filters across his face, eyes instantly watering. Oikawa pulls his bottom lip in between his teeth, biting down as he exhales heavily through his nose. He yanks his hand away, neck hot and turning a light pink as he shuffles back a couple feet. “No,” he says, “I’m not.”

“God fucking-- Oikawa, just, stop it , okay?! We’re really worried--”

“I never asked you guys to be!” Oikawa snaps, his voice echoing around the gym.

Hanamaki freezes, eyes wide. He takes a small step back. Oikawa has never yelled at him before, he’s never sounded so mad. Hanamaki inhales shakily, biting the inside of his cheek. Oikawa turns his enraged glare upon him, gazing at him with narrowed eyes.

“I--”

“That’s enough out of you,” Matsukawa’s voice says.

Before Oikawa or Hanamaki can turn to see what’s happening, Matsukawa steps up and throws Oikawa over his shoulder. He doesn’t care about Oikawa’s fists angrily pounding against his back anymore, because this has gone on long enough and he’s tired of watching his friend slowly destroying himself.

“You got him,” Iwaizumi says as they exit, holding all their bags. Hanamaki quickly rushes forward to take half of them, receiving a thankful nod from Iwaizumi.

Oikawa continues to curse the whole way there, never giving Matsukawa a break as he slams his fists down on his back. Matsukawa sighs, trying his best to ignore they pain as they make their way to the Hanamaki household.

Matsukawa drops Oikawa onto his bed.

“Thank you! Now, excuse me , I need to--”

“Do you think I should call my eyebrows eyebros?”

Oikawa freezes from where he was about to launch himself off the bed. He squints. “What?”

“My eyebrows,” Matsukawa says, running his finger over them with a thoughtful expression. “Should I call them eyebros?”

Hanamaki stifles his snort, covering his mouth with his hand as he sets his and Oikawa’s bags down. Iwaizumi, standing by the doorway and acting as a makeshift bodyguard, doesn’t bother to hide his amused smile.

“I-- what?” Oikawa says, staring at Matsukawa as if he’s crazy.

“I said, should I call my--”

“No! I know what you said, but why would you...what the fuck, Mattsun.”

Matsukawa sighs dramatically, turning to look at Hanamaki. “I guess he doesn’t like it, and I really thought he’d agree to it.”

“I don’t know,” Hanamaki yawns, stretching out on the floor, “I think it’s clever.”

Oikawa sits there, watching as Hanamaki and Matsukawa talk back and forth. Iwaizumi even joins in a moment later, adding his input about how Hanamaki is being replaced by eyebrows. Hanamaki ends up screaming in betrayal.

Oikawa knows what they’re doing. They’re distracting him, trying to get him to calm down, and it’s working.

He smiles, looking down at his hands.

“I, personally, think that your eyebrows are hideous. You should get them plucked.”

Three pair of eyes turn to Oikawa, and he can see the relief on their faces as they take a moment to understand his words.

“That’s really fucking rude of you to even suggest, Oikawa,” Matsukawa sniffs.

Chapter Text

Iwaizumi takes a deep breath, eyes slowly sliding open. He can do this. He has trained for this. He’s done it before, and he can do it again.

Placing his arm on the table, he looks at Hanamaki sitting across from him. Hanamaki pulls up his sleeves, licking his bottom lip in determination-- fuck , when did Iwaizumi get so weak ?-- and places his arm on the table as well. He lifts his gaze, grinning at Iwaizumi.

“I have a feeling I’ll be beating you this time, Hajime-kun.”

Iwaizumi keeps his stare leveled, though internally he wishes to die. He’s become hyper aware of all of them, and it’s awful because little things they’ve always done set him off. Like Hanamaki calling him by his first name. He has to grit his teeth and force the blush to not splatter across his face.

Grabbing Hanamaki’s hand, he scoffs. “I highly doubt that, Takahiro.”

A look of surprise flashes across his face, and Iwaizumi watches as his face slowly turns a bright pink. He’s confused until he realizes what he said. He’s never called Hanamaki by his first name, and holy shit, he would've done it much sooner if this is what would’ve happened.

Smirking, Iwaizumi focuses on their arms. He tries to focus, breath hitching as Matsukawa places his own hand on top of theirs, making sure there’s no cheating.

“Alright, I want a nice, clean match. Loser buys us all lunch.”

Iwaizumi narrows his eyes, listening to Matsukawa as he slowly counts down. He makes the mistake of zeroing in on Hanamaki’s hand. When did he get such nice hands? They’re surprisingly soft, and smooth. Does he use lotion? Hanamaki doesn’t strike him as the type of person to use lotion. Maybe Oikawa has had an influence on him? But, nonetheless, Hanamaki has some really nice hands and Iwaizumi really wouldn’t mind just sitting here and holding his hand the whole day.

As Matsukawa says zero, Iwaizumi flushes red from his own thoughts. Hanamaki pushes against his own hand, pulling Iwaizumi from his very gay thoughts, and he grunts and quickly pushes back.

Oikawa watches, grabbing Matsukawa’s arm. He shakes his friend, cheering for Hanamaki. It would be nice to see someone beat Iwaizumi for once.

Matsukawa sighs, looking down at Oikawa. “Why are you cheering for Makki? Now I have to cheer for Iwaizumi.”

Oikawa smiles, poking his cheek. “It’s fun to mix things up sometimes, isn’t it?”

Matsukawa simply rolls his eyes, looking back at the match. Hanamaki sticks his tongue out, grunting as he pushes desperately at Iwaizumi’s hand. Oikawa and Matsukawa hold their breath as he pushes Iwaizumi’s hand down, so close to the table, but then Iwaizumi smirks and they both know he’s been holding back. They watch as Iwaizumi pushes against Hanamaki’s hand, and they both battle for a couple seconds before Iwaizumi turns the whole match around and slams Hanamaki’s hand down on the table.

Hanamaki collapses against the table, a pathetic moan escaping his lips. “I hate you, Iwaizumi! You’ve tarnished my name once again.”

Iwaizumi smiles, leaning over to pat his head. “It’s okay, man, just think about it...now you get to buy us lunch.”

Hanamaki glares up at him, huffing as he stands up. “Fine, fine , it’s fine ! No really, it’s fine !” He says dramatically, turning around. He walks a couple steps, then stops and turns to them with confusion. “Well, are you coming? I’m starving.”

Matsukawa nods, quickly following after him. Oikawa simply laughs before he grabs Iwaizumi’s wrist, tugging him onto his feet and jogging after the other two.

Hanamaki stares at his now empty wallet, shaking his head. “You guys are lucky I like you,” he grumbles, stuffing noodles into his mouth. Iwaizumi grins, stuffing tofu into his mouth. Matsukawa pouts, still mad that he doesn’t get his favorite food when the rest of them do. Oikawa simply smiles at him, the package of milk bread resting safely in his lap so that Matsukawa can’t throw it away.

“Next time,” Matsukawa says, picking up his chopsticks. “We’re going to a place that has what I want.”

“I like this place, though,” Iwaizumi says, stuffing more tofu into his mouth.

“Yeah, they have a bakery next door!” Oikawa adds.

Hanamaki nods in agreement, stroking the package of cream puffs sitting on the table next to him. “If you’re really that upset, then I’ll share my cream puffs with you, Mattsun.”

Matsukawa gasps, placing a hand to his chest. He stares at Hanamaki, wiping a fake tear from his eye. “Y-Y-You would share your c-cream puffs? With lil ol me?”

Hanamaki snorts, rolling his eyes, but he decides to play the part anyway. He places his hand on Matsukawa’s shoulder, eyes growing wide. “Yes, my love, I would share anything with you!”

“Oh, Makki!”

“Oh, Mattsun!”

“Shut the fuck up, please,” Iwaizumi says, glancing around the small restaurant. They’re defiantely causing a scene.

“Aw, you take the fun out of everything,” Matsukawa pouts, chuckling as he slurps up some of his own noodles.

Iwaizumi walks beside Oikawa, watching as Matsukawa and Hanamaki playfully push each other in front of them. They spent the whole day together, somehow, and lost track of the time. Four different moms screaming at them on their phones was enough for them to grab all their stuff and start the walk home.

He’s glad they don’t have practice on Monday’s, because it’s already so late and he’s not sure if he’ll be able to get enough sleep tonight.

Shaking his head, he glances over at Oikawa. He’s staring at the sky, a content look on his face. The stars reflect in his wide eyes, causing Iwaizumi to stumble where he walks, cursing slightly. Oikawa rips his gaze away from the sky, laughing.

“You got to be more careful, Iwa-chan! I know I’m distracting, but that’s no reason for you to go hurting yourself!”

Iwaizumi huffs, rolling his eyes. “If you don’t want me to hurt myself, then stop being so distracting.”

Oikawa’s eyes widen slightly, and he grins. “Aw, do I distract you, Iwa-chan?”

“Is this a confession?” Matsukawa stage whispers to Hanamaki.

Iwaizumi flushes red, glaring at Matsukawa. “No, it isn’t!” He snaps, walking swiftly to get in front of them. He hears all three of them laugh behind him, but he can’t find that he honestly cares. Listening to them laugh and...knowing that they’re happy, as sappy as it sounds, makes Iwaizumi happy. He cares for his friends, more than he’d like to.

When they finally reach where they split off, he freezes. Slowly turning around, he nervously bites his lip. Tomorrow they don’t have practice.

“Hey…” he says slowly, gaining their attention. “Do you guys want to come over after school tomorrow?”

Chapter Text

Iwaizumi stands in the corner, water bottle in hand as he watches Oikawa talk to Hanamaki and Matsukawa. Usually, he’d be standing with them, but with all this anxious energy coursing through his veins, he’s not sure if he can truly face them right now. It’s way too early in the morning for any interaction with them, so he can only hope he’ll be okay by lunch.

“Iwaizumi-san,” Watari says, causing him to rip his gaze away from the other three third years. “Do you mind helping me with receives? You can ogle your boyfriends later.”

Iwaizumi sputters, choking on the water and coughing violently. Watari laughs, thwacking his back hard. “Don't worry, Iwaizumi-san, I don't think anyone else has noticed that you four are a thing. Well, I mean, besides Yahaba because we talk all the time.”

Iwaizumi narrows his eyes, awkwardly looking down at his feet. “We’re...not…”

Watari’s eyes grow wide, disbelief spreading across his features. “What? You’re joking, right?”

Iwaizumi lifts his shoulders into a shrug, jerkily shaking his head. Watari’s mouth falls open in shock. “You should really fix that,” Watari suggests, shaking his head slowly, still trying to wrap his mind around the situation.

Iwaizumi sighs, gaze slowly sliding away to look at the other three. Hanamaki is basically wheezing, Matsukawa is smirking as he wiggles his eyebrows at Oikawa, and Oikawa looks offended yet he, too, is trying not to laugh.

“Yeah,” Iwaizumi mumbles, looking back at the libero. “I’m working on it.”

He doesn’t mean for it to happen, but it does anyway. He can’t, no matter how hard he tries, pay attention in any of his classes. Never did he think something like this would cause him this much stress. Iwaizumi is sure he prepared for this, because he’s been holding it off for so long. It’s about time he puts on his big boy pants and march up to the other three and tell them what’s been going on. He even rehearsed his speech. He's one-hundred percent prepared. 

That’s what he’d like to think, of course. All that confidence was tossed out the window the moment he invited them over. Now that he thinks about it, though, one can’t really blame him, right? It’s normal to be nervous over something like this.

Not just nervous, though. He’s terrified as well. What if they reject him? What if they stare at him like he’s crazy, or if they laugh? What if they politely ask to not be friends anymore? He couldn’t live with something like that.

One thought that didn’t even cross his mind-- what if they’re not even into guys?

Oikawa is, he knows. They’ve been friends since forever, and it’s only natural that the two of them are open toward each other and tell each other almost everything. They have heart-to-hearts every now and again. Oikawa specifically told him he's pansexual because “everyone is so pretty, Iwa-chan, it isn’t fair.”

What about Matsukawa and Hanamaki, though? He’s pretty sure they’re somewhere on the line of liking boys. He’s also pretty sure he remembers Hanamaki talking about how he wouldn’t mind being with a girl or guy. It may be his brain just giving him hope, though.

Shaking his head, Iwaizumi zeros in on the teacher’s voice. He isn't sure how long he hasn't been listening, but as the teacher continues to ramble, Iwaizumi can tell that he has no idea what the fuck she’s even talking about.

Sighing heavily, Iwaizumi gazes down at his notebook. Instantly, all the worries from before come rushing back in.

He really hopes he survives the day.

The ringing of the lunch bell startles Iwaizumi out of his thoughts. He stays where he is, staring at his desk and trying to calm his rapidly beating heart. He then jumps as an arm slides around his shoulder, yanking him out of his seat.

“The other two are waiting for us, jeez, Iwaizumi, you’re so slow today,” Matsukawa teases, quickly leading him towards the roof.

“Wait, I didn’t bring my lunch--”

“That’s fine, Oikawa and Hanamaki sprinted away to grab us all some stuff.”

Iwaizumi nods to show he heard, ducking away from Matsukawa’s hold so he can dodge a group of students coming their way. Once they walk by, he steps back over to Matsukawa, sighing heavily.

“Long day?” Matsukawa asks, gently grabbing his upper arm so he can steer him towards the stairs leading toward the roof. The touch instantly sends prickles of warmth up his arm.

“Something like that,” he mumbles, nodding in thanks as Matsukawa holds the door open for him. He quickly moves to their regular spot, Matsukawa right on his heels.

“You know, we don’t have to come over if you’re not up to it--”

“No!” He says quickly, startling both him and Matsukawa. ”Uh, no, I want you guys to come over. I actually have something I need to tell you guys.”

Matsukawa raises an eyebrow. “Oh? Is it something bad?”

“Depends on how you guys take it.”

Matsukawa frowns, eyebrows furrowing together. It’s obvious he has no idea what Iwaizumi is going to say. Before he can ask anything else, Oikawa throws the roof door open, arms filled with a variety of food. Hanamaki follows right behind him, smile wide, arms full of drinks.

Matsukawa takes one more look at Iwaizumi before turning his attention to the other two, a small smile spreading across his lips.

The walk to Iwaizumi’s house is tense. Or, well, tense to Iwaizumi. And nerve racking. To the other three it seems normal. They laugh and bump shoulders and tease and just enjoy each other’s company. Any other day, and Iwaizumi would gladly join in and be happy that they’re so comfortable around each other. This day is different, though.

Pulling out his keys, he grumbles under his breath about them being impatient. It doesn’t take long for him to unlock the door, stepping into the house and moving out of the way so they can shuffle in behind him.

Once they’re all in and have taken their shoes off, Iwaizumi pokes his head into the kitchen to find his mother cooking dinner. She beams when she sees the small group of boys, insisting that they all stay for dinner. Of course, Oikawa agrees with a beaming, wide smile. Matsukawa nods, shrugging as if he has nothing better to do. Hanamaki looks hesitant, but agrees after a moment of thinking about it.

Iwaizumi decides to wait until after dinner. So with many complaints from Oikawa, they all make their way down the hallway and to Iwaizumi’s room. Once they’re all settled down on the ground, Matsukawa clears his throat.

“So, what did you want to talk about?”

Hanamaki looks up in confusion. Oikawa tilts his head.

“After dinner,” Iwaizumi replies casually, flipping open his textbook.

“Wha--” Oikawa starts to ask, but Iwaizumi shakes his head.

“After dinner,” he says again, pulling out his homework.

Oikawa pouts, but agrees with a dramatic sigh. They work mostly in silence, the only speaking being done when one of them has a question. Hanamaki leans over to ask Oikawa multiple questions about his math, and Oikawa just smiles gently and explains it in the simplest way. It’s nice to see how they all get along, but it’s also terrifying to know that Iwaizumi could possibly ruin that just by confessing.

He runs through his speech all throughout dinner, palms sweating. He has to wipe them on his pants multiple times, smiling tightly every time his mother turns her attention to him. He’s shooting out of his seat, and practically racing to his room once they all finish, his heart picking up speed for the nth time that day.

He has to do this, no matter what. He’s waited way too long, and he can’t let this opportunity slip through his fingers. Matsukawa is the first to enter, calmly sitting down where he was before. Hanamaki looks oddly panicked as he slowly sits down beside Matsukawa. Oikawa just looks confused.

Iwaizumi stays standing, looking down at the three of them. He goes to speak multiple times, but words fail him and his voice dies out.

Then Hanamaki speaks up.

“You’re not dying, are you?!”

Iwaizumi blinks. “What? No.”

“Oh, thank god,” he sighs, relaxing slightly. He then stiffens up again. “You’re not moving either, right? You’re not dropping us as friends? You’re not--” Oikawa laughs, quickly placing his hand over Hanamaki’s mouth to shush him.

“Uh, no, none of… What the fuck, Makki?”

“I fush haf ‘o mahe sure!” He says, voice muffled because of Oikawa’s hand.

“Anyway,” Matsukawa says, casually lifting his leg so he can poke Iwaizumi’s knee with his foot. “Spill the beans.”

Iwaizumi sighs. He just needs to say it. He practiced this. “I'm gay.” Well, not exactly what he wanted to say, but whatever.

Hanamaki raises an eyebrow. “Um, okay? We're all somewhat gay.”

Iwaizumi lifts an eyebrow.

“I'm gay, you're gay, Makki’s bi, Oikawa’s pan. We all like some dick.”

Oikawa squeaks, flying over Hanamaki and knocking him over, just so he can slap a hand over Matsukawa’s mouth, eyes wide. “Don't say things that are so vulgar!”

Matsukawa laughs, leaning away from Oikawa. “Well, it's true. ”

Iwaizumi clears his throat. “That isn't it, I'm not only gay.”

All three of them look at him, wearing different looks of confusion.

“I'm...uh. I'm poly...polyamorous…” He trails off, cheeks tinging pink.  

Oikawa stares, slowly taking a deep breath. “And, uh, why are you…telling us?”

Iwaizumi looks away, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck. He forgot all about the speech he had planned. He was expecting to sit down with confidence radiating off him. Of course that didn't happen.

“I might...no, I do, want….yeah, to be with you all. Um. Yeah. This is me asking you all out.”

The room falls silent. Iwaizumi is eighty percent sure Oikawa isn't breathing. Hanamaki looks stunned, about to pass out. Matsukawa just looks in shock, his eyes wide, jaw hanging open slightly.

The silence stretches for about five minutes.

“Okay, this is-- yeah-- I...am going to go,” Iwaizumi chokes out, spinning around on his heel. He knew this was a bad idea. He knew he shouldn't of done this. What was he thinking? Now he’ll lose his three best friends and--

“Hajime, where are you going to go?! We’re at your house!” Oikawa calls, scrambling to his feet. That snaps Hanamaki and Matsukawa out of their shock. Hanamaki literally launches himself off the floor, right at Iwaizumi.

Iwaizumi, luckily, had turned around once Oikawwa had spoken up. He stumbles back a few feet, grunting as Hanamaki’s arms wrap tightly around him, pulling him into a hug. Iwaizumi nervously smiles, raising an eyebrow, but nothing gets answered. Instead, Oikawa jumps at them, hugging Iwaizumi from the back. Matsukawa is next, casually wrapping his arms around them all, squeezing them close.

“Uh..” Iwaizumi gulps, “is...that a yes?”

“Fuck yeah,” Hanamaki says, beaming at him. Oikawa nods enthusiastically. Matsukawa hums in agreement.

Iwaizumi can't help but laugh, relaxing in their hold. Who needs speeches anyway.