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They had been fighting for three days.
To say tension was high in the Agreste house was an understatement. It was more like the house was on fire and that fire wasn’t going out anytime soon. Adrien honestly wished that it really could be on fire because at least then maybe they’d stop arguing for more than ten minutes. The only relief they got was when they went to sleep (they slept in separate beds after the reveal, Marinette preferring to keep her distance) and when they attempted to sit down and eat together. Those meals didn’t really feel like a relief, however, because Adrien expected any moment now they’d be at it again.
Alya had offered Marinette a place to stay, of which Marinette had declined. You see, despite how much she wanted to act like she hated him after this, she didn’t, and she still wanted to get the last word in. She had to be right. After all, she was the one who protected Paris for years under her own mask. If Gabriel was the one who caused that chaos in the first place, then she could do no wrong in this situation. He was entirely in the wrong.
Right?
Adrien was visiting, having moved out a few years ago, but he wondered now if moving out had been the best choice. What if the fighting wasn’t as out of place as he thought? What if he’d been the one keeping them from doing so? No, no, he wasn’t going to guilt himself like that now. It was just a bit tough when he’d see Gabriel and Marinette fighting...and remember the times Gabriel and his mother would do the same.
Why did his father always like those who were too stubborn to submit to him if he wanted control so much?
Maybe it was to keep himself in check. Maybe he just liked the chaos. Adrien wasn’t sure and it did honestly worry him. Marinette had made so much progress with helping his father fix these problems, but sometimes they still cropped up. Change took time, he knew, but he just hated seeing them hurting each other, even if he knew that it wasn’t always like that.
Hawkmoth hadn’t akumatized anyone in years. Now they knew why. Gabriel himself was Hawkmoth, and he’d given up the power for the last several years. In fact, he’d given it up to the point of locking the miraculous away and going about life as if it had never happened. Except that it did, and Marinette had not taken too kindly to the fact he’d never told her.
Tikki had sensed Nooroo was active again, both freaking out because they might have to deal with Hawkmoth once more, but also enthusiastic that they might find their friend again. Nooroo had already been missing for so long even before Hawkmoth ever came around, and they’d never found him even after Hawkmoth quit. Emotions were high enough before Plagg had decided perhaps checking behind that painting was a good idea. And when Marinette and Tikki had caught him coming out of it, well...
He couldn’t hide that he’d found it.
Tikki had immediately freaked out, wondering if he’d done something that they hadn’t noticed yet. They’d felt Nooroo become active again, but there had been no sign of an akuma yet. What if he only locked it up to hide it from Marinette? After all, Tikki would notice the miraculous from a mile away, especially after they’d moved in together. What if he was just biding his time? What if he was waiting until both Marinette and Adrien trusted him enough and planned to steal their miraculouses then? What if everything with Marinette was just to get her miraculous?
No matter how much Plagg tried to divert the subject, Tikki just continued to freak out...all right beside Marinette. It wasn’t dealt with well and it wasn’t dealt with still. Tikki put too many doubts in Marinette’s head, not thinking things through at all. It wasn’t long before Marinette was marching into Gabriel’s home office and demanding his attention, confronting him head on like the stubborn woman she was.
Adrien didn’t know what all had been discussed so far, but he knew Marinette didn’t believe any of it and Gabriel wasn’t ready to admit he’d been wrong either. There were too many insults flying around and they only ever tried to be quiet if Adrien walked in. Gabriel had sent the staff home for the week, claiming he needed time to himself. While they definitely needed privacy for at least a little bit, Adrien had to wonder if they really needed a week.
Okay, nevermind, they probably did.
What had finally become a somewhat stable life now felt like a house of cards, ready to topple over at any moment. Just one uttered word, breathe blown too hard...Only one wrong statement...
Adrien couldn’t stand it. Yes, he was hurting too after finding out the news, but it was easier for him to forgive Gabriel than Marinette, it seemed. After all, from the bits and pieces he’d gotten from their arguments, it seemed as if one of the primary reasons he’d even done it was to get his mom back. How could he argue against that? How could he at all feel like he could judge the man?
After all, he likely would have done something similar himself if given the chance. If he knew he could have brought his mother back with their miraculous...He might have done things he regret too.
Supper on the third day. Adrien almost wished that Marinette hadn’t started to require they attempt to eat supper as a family whenever Adrien was around. Yeah, it had been good at first and had good intentions behind it, but was now really the best time? He’d been tempted to go home from his visit early and yet was too concerned to leave. If he protested, Marinette would insist. If he tried to talk to Gabriel, there would just be a muttered ‘You know how she feels about either of us trying to skip out on this’ and they would all still be stuck sitting at the dinner table wishing they weren’t there.
The tension in the air was thick, and Adrien hated just how much he could hear the utensils as they clicked and scraped against their plates. It was almost maddening, in its own way. He almost preferred the screaming. At least then he wouldn’t be waiting for it to start. No one dared attempt to talk, despite how much Adrien wanted to break the silence. What could he even say? What did it matter? Would it help at all? He wasn’t sure, to be honest. It could go either way.
And then he spilled his wine, having been paying too much attention to the others to realize he’d held his hand the wrong way, bumping into the glass by accident. Gabriel glanced at Adrien, hesitantly getting up with a bit of a sigh. “I’ll clean it up.”
“N-no, I can do it. Don’t worry about it, fath-!”
“Why don’t you just make him do it? It’s what you’re good at, isn’t it?”
Oh no. Oh no no no.
“I’m not doing this in front of Adrien, Marinette.” Gabriel replied, stern and cold. There was an attempt to be commanding, but a feeling of exhaustion lined his words. Just like Adrien, he was tired by this point. However, unlike Adrien, he was still too stubborn to just let Marinette win.
Marinette, however, was still as fired up as when she started.
“It’s not like he doesn’t know, Gabriel! He’s been here the entire time so what does it matter?”
“Because, unlike what you may think, I do respect him enough to not involve him.”
Oh boy, he was the subject of conversation. Great.
“You involved him as soon as you sent akumas after him! You were controlling people to get them to attack us!”
“I told you my reasoning. My wife, she-”
“Except if it was only her, then you could have just asked, couldn’t you? There had to be more to it. There had to be something else you wanted that Master Fu would not have approved of or else you wouldn’t have had to lure the miraculous out with your akumas. Try to tell me I’m wrong.”
Gabriel sighed again, glancing over at Adrien. “Adrien, please leave the room. Perhaps a shower would do you good.”
“No.”
He surprised himself with his response. A silence running over them all. Adrien took a deep breath, trying to stand up straight and use his height to his advantage just as his father often did. He’d gotten quite the growth spurt at the end of puberty and he’d best use it to his advantage.
“I’m not leaving you two alone anymore when you obviously need a mediator. This has gone on long enough.”
Marinette and Gabriel both stared at him in shock, not exactly used to him acting like this. He was usually so quiet, avoiding the chaos. He did find himself speaking up for what was right a bit more often as he grew, but to step between these two? It wasn’t something he had to normally do, really, but standing up to them individually was already a scary enough thought. Standing up to them both? He was shaking in his boots a little bit.
“Father stopped what he was doing. Shouldn’t that prove something, Marinette?” He started off, then turning to Gabriel. “And just because you stopped doesn’t mean the wounds aren’t still there! An apology would be a good idea, you know!”
The two of them glanced away, not exactly sure they were ready for the obvious conclusion to this argument. Marinette shook her head before taking a deep breath and...continuing anyway.
“But he started using it again recently! What if he hasn’t stopped at all and was just biding his time?” She accused, directing a hand toward Gabriel as she glared defiantly in Adrien’s direction. “Tikki said she felt it activated and I trust her to tell me the truth!”
“There’s been no akumas!” Adrien pointed out, glancing over at Gabriel and biting his lip slightly, hoping he wasn’t defending him wrongly. “Why don’t we just ask him what he activated it for? You know, instead of throwing more and more suspicions.”
Gabriel took a deep breath, his hands already behind his back. The motion helped ground him, keep him feeling as if he had some control. In a way, it was a nervous tick in and of itself, but at least the mere action of it hid just what it was. “I had no ill intentions. I’ve tried to put that behind me. In fact, I had hoped it would just eventually be forgotten and I’d never have to talk about it again. No one had to know and it didn’t have to affect my future.”
“Gabriel, this was important! Of course it affects us! We fought for years and you decided it was best for all of us to just not say anything about it? How could you hide this from me? From Adrien?” Marinette continued, trying to have a calmer voice, if only to keep from making Adrien freak out more.
“I never said I decided it was best for us. It was best for me.” Finally, somewhat of an admission. He knew it wasn’t what everyone else needed. He knew it was selfish. Okay, maybe Adrien could work with this. Maybe this could work.
“Then why activate it at all? Wouldn’t that put you at risk of being found out?” Adrien asked, hoping that he could encourage his father to just...talk. “If anything, father, I don’t hold it against you, okay?”
Gabriel stiffened then, having not expected that. Had he really thought Adrien would hate him too? And why did he seem nervous to hear that?
“You should.”
Everything went silent once more. Adrien found himself deflating slightly. Gabriel didn’t meet his gaze and chose not to look at either of them. Adrien half worried the man would turn and walk out, as he often did when something this emotional was brought up. It was as if he was afraid of any emotions besides anger. Calm, collected, stern Gabriel. He didn’t allow himself to show concern, fear, guilt....
“...I did wrong. I put you and Marinette in danger. I put all of Paris in danger. I even kept going after I knew who you were. And all for my own selfish reasons. You should hold it against me because there’s a reason I hid it from you all. I wanted to move on and forget I’d let myself get that desperate. I hurt you thinking that the end game was worth it because perhaps you’d be happier if we had her back. Perhaps we’d both be happier. And after a while, I started considering gaining more from the miraculous once I had them. I started getting ambitious. It wasn’t just about your mother anymore. It all went to my head and...” He took a deep breath, closing his eyes. “That’s why I locked it up. It...wasn’t helping me get better.”
“...Ah...” Adrien scratched his chin, taking a deep breath as well.
Marinette groaned, running a hand through her hair. “That still doesn’t answer why you activated it recently. Or why you didn’t just give it up to Master Fu or one of us for safe-keeping. That would have been more effective, don’t you think? And what if someone else had found it? Huh? Someone who wouldn’t have stopped!”
“And you think Master Fu would keep it safer than I would?! I got my hands on it, after all! And if he had just never-!” Gabriel shook his head, taking a deep breath and attempting to calm once more. “That doesn’t matter. I kept it safe, and my reasons were nothing like what you imply. I’m done with this conversation.” He began to turn, ready to leave.
“You’re done when we all decide you’re done. Don’t you dare walk away!” Marinette stomped over to him, his height and build no longer even remotely something that scared her. She was Ladybug, after all, and she’d gained quite a bit of muscle tone from it over the years. That being said, when she grabbed his arm to spin him back around, it honestly wasn’t even a surprise.
“Why did you activate it, Gabriel? Tell me now!”
“Because I thought you might be pregnant!”
The blurted admission left them all shocked. It seemed so out of left field that the younger two weren’t quite sure what to think of it. What did that have to do with the miraculous? More importantly, though, if it was true...would she even want it now?
“W-what?” Marinette’s question was quiet, dropping from her lips as her body went stiff. Her eyes were wide, lost and confused. She almost looked like that scared little girl from years past, suddenly faced with a possibility of something she wasn’t sure she could take.
“I...I’m not as good at reading emotion on my own. But I suspected you were having more...mood swings than normal.” Gabriel looked over at Adrien, the slightest bit of a plea in his eyes before he hid it once more, almost expertly. “I can sense others emotions with it. I don’t have to guess, I just know.”
“...You're afraid.” Adrien muttered, before either of them could continue. If anything, while there were parts of his father that still remained a mystery to him, this he could see through immediately. “...You’re afraid of having another child. After everything between us...” The younger Agreste took a deep breath, shaking ever so slightly before the words spilled from his mouth. “Instead of facing it head on, did you hope we’d find out, father? Did you hope we’d find out and she’d decide not to have it?”
Gabriel was silent, wishing desperately that he could leave. Adrien was too intuitive. Sometimes, he noticed what Marinette wouldn’t. Yes, Marinette was usually the more clever one, but what Adrien lacked in most normal social skills, he gained in the screwed up thought processes of his own home.
“You’re afraid you’ll screw up again, aren’t you? That I was enough of a failed attempt, another couldn’t be any better. You don’t want another failure around. You’d rather reveal who you were and what all you did than have to face that possibility again!”
“Adrien-”
But he was running before they could stop him, running before he even knew his feet were moving, transforming before either of them could even think to even say anything. It wasn’t long before he found himself jumping from rooftop to rooftop, just wanting to get away. He didn’t care where, so long as it was away from them both. The arguing was bad enough, but this?
It only proved some problems could never be fixed.
He didn’t keep track of how long or far he ran, only stopping once he was out of breath and losing his ability to hold back the tears. While he didn’t hide his emotion as much as his father, he still preferred to be alone during some of the worst breakdowns. He liked to think everything with them had gotten better, that Marinette had showed Gabriel how to be more of a father and communicate better. He felt like she had made quite a lot of progress, and she had at least opened communication up more, but if Gabriel was this desperate to avoid the possibility of children again...
Had he really been that bad of a son? He’d done his best. Outside of a few rebellious acts, he’d always tried to make Gabriel happy. It was impossible, though. The only thing that would have made him happy for the longest time was getting her back-
He’d kept him from that all along.
Adrien stared down at the claws on his hands, the black of his transformed outfit making him feel sick all of a sudden. No wonder his father didn’t want anymore children. His only child had kept him from gaining back happiness for years. He’d fought against him for so long, thinking he was saving Paris, and yet he was only making everything between them worse.
He was the worst son in the world.
“Adrien.” A deep voice, demanding his attention, yet attempting a softness that sounded foreign. Deeper than his father’s voice, but now he could hear it. It really was him, even if the miraculous modified the voice just enough for anonymity. He wasn’t very surprised when he looked up to see purple, though he did find it a bit surprising that he was looking up even more than usual. He knew his own miraculous made modification, but his father’s went much further.
He almost ran again, but as soon as he was standing, there was a gloved hand on his arm. He could likely run away, as he was the more physical of the two and probably could fight him off, but when he saw his eyes...
There was compassion, concern and fear. His father was afraid? But why? It wasn’t like he was actually running aw-
But he didn’t know that. Gabriel had already lost his wife. Could he possibly be afraid he’d lose his son too?
“You don’t have to come back, but I need you to know that you’re not the failure of this family.” The older man started off, hesitantly softening his grip until he let go of the other, gingerly placing both hands on his cane. “If anything, that’s...me.”
This had to be tough for the man, admitting to his own faults was certainly not his strong point. Adrien couldn’t help but feel a twist in his gut at the admittance, glancing down at his feet. Hearing his father speak ill of himself was almost more painful than the screaming.
“But I kept you from getting mom back. I kept you from ever getting better.”
“You and Marinette helped much more than you likely know. Yes, I still miss her. I know you do, too. But if I had continued on the way I was...you likely wouldn’t be here. Who wins then?” Gabriel sighed, glancing back to see Marinette had now joined them, red and black covering her form.
“I don’t want to lose either of you. I thought I had lost everything when I lost her, but there’s...more here than I thought before. I thought I couldn’t handle raising you without her. I thought I couldn’t keep things together without her. I thought I’d lost my ability to care without her.” Gabriel couldn’t meet either of their eyes, never one to be comfortable admitting weakness. “And I did for a while. I didn’t care at all. I fell apart. I threw all the responsibilities of raising you onto other people.”
Marinette hesitantly took Adrien’s own gloved hand, giving him a soft smile that didn’t quite match the guilt in her eyes before allowing Gabriel to continue.
“I don’t know what that means when it comes to children in the future, but if anyone failed anyone, it was me who failed you. Not the other way around.” Gabriel muttered, finally looking back at Adrien. It was odd, talking to him with a mask covering his face. He thought he’d never do it. In fact, he thought he’d never even use the miraculous again. What need did he have by this point? “Yes, I’m afraid of having more children. Yes, I had thought maybe this would discourage it, and if it does then that’s that. I’m not afraid because you were terrible, I’m afraid because I was.”
Marinette placed a hand on Gabriel’s, his own clasped so tightly around the top of his cane that he might have broken it if it were a normal one. “You can stop now, Gabriel. It’s...it’s okay. You’re repeating yourself.”
Gabriel hesitantly nodded, attempting to relax and organize his thought processes once more. “What I’m trying to say is I don’t want to lose you too, but if you feel like you need to leave, then do what you must. Marinette and I will...figure out our own problems.”
Adrien quietly nodded, unsure of how to take that. His father had slowly started giving him more free reign since...well, he guessed since the man gave up being Hawkmoth. If what he was saying was true, then that must have been the turning point. He realized he would likely kill Adrien if he didn’t stop, and so he did.
They were certainly a screwed up family, but it could have been worse. Much worse.
“It’s okay, father. I don’t plan to leave. I...may need some time, though. I think the both of you might need some too.” After all, he knew Marinette had wanted children since she was one. If Gabriel was afraid to have them and she desperately wanted them, this was going to be a tough situation.
“Yes, we...have a lot to discuss.” Marinette muttered, taking in a deep breath before taking a glance over at Hawkm-Gabriel. It was Gabriel. She shook her head, trying to not let the feelings from before take over. He wasn’t the same man, not the same one who sent out akumas and attempted to take their miraculouses from them. He had changed since then, thanks to her and Adrien. Life had gotten better and here they were trying to sabotage it over something so far in the past that it should no longer matter. “I...think we can keep the screaming to a minimum this time. I know I’ll try to.”
It wouldn’t be good for the baby to get so worked up.
Oh, goodness, the baby!
She needed to get a pregnancy test. Oh gosh, this...this could really be happening. A baby!
Her hands shot up to her face, the grin on her features seeming excessively out of place after the last several days. It was almost surreal. She began jumping in place for a moment before suddenly grounding herself again, a quick reminder not to jostle the baby.
“And there’s another mood swing.” Gabriel muttered, taking a deep breath.
“So, I should definitely go get some preganancy tests on the way home, yes?” She asked, feeling breathless and excited.
“Out of costume, preferably. Don’t give them any hints.”
She merely nodded before turning to Adrien, mouthing the words ‘A baby!’ before suddenly swinging away, obviously too excited to wait.
When she was out of hearing distance, Adrien looked back up at his father, hoping this wouldn’t be pushing things to ask. “You know she’ll never get rid of it, yes?”
“Yes. That’s become even more obvious now.”
“Will you be okay?”
Gabriel was quiet for a moment, still looking at Marinette swinging between buildings in the distance. His hesitance worried Adrien, the younger male hoping this wouldn’t be too much of a strain between them.
“It makes her happy.” Gabriel muttered, hesitantly placing a hand on the butterfly broach on his collar. Could he feel it? Did the miraculous help him feel the positive emotions directly? Adrien had to wonder just how it must feel, sensing others’ emotions like that. Did he used to wear it all the time? Wouldn’t that be exhausting? But if he could feel the positives as well...
“What does it make you?” He asked after a moment.
“...Her happiness makes me happy.” And with that, Gabriel was walking towards the edge of the building, keeping an eye on Marinette as she detransformed and walked into a store. “I know all of this has to be tough on you, Adrien, if not strange, but I think we’ll be just fine.”
“You’re willing to try again to make her happy?” Adrien asked, moving over to stand by him.
“This happy?” His hand was on the miraculous again, a semblance of a smile on his own face now. “Certainly.”