Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Holtzmann had no idea how she ended up being friends with Kevin Beckman, the schools bumbling, though loveable, idiot. 

One minute she was helping him out with his math homework (he sat down next to her at the beginning of junior year because "I like boys, you like girls, we should be friends." Holtzmann is sure that reasoning made sense to Kevin), the next he was following her around like a lost puppy. 

So, they were friends, which was fine. Usually, Holtzmann liked being alone, she would even eat in one of the chemistry labs, but there was just something about Kevin that she didn't mind having him around. 

He was sweet, a nice guy, really. And, as dumb as he was, he seemed to have a sixth sense for when Holtzmann didn't want to talk (he would just sit in silence beside her while she read, or worked on homework), or when she was sad (he would show up in the chemistry class she ate in with a tube of Pringles and a few cup cakes from the local cafe. The first few times this happened he would offer her a soft smile and leave, then Holtzmann started requesting he stay). She took some sort of comfort having Kevin around, it took her a few months to realise that that was what having a best friend felt like. 

Holtzmann was eating her lunch when Kevin came rushing in, his phone in his hand. Her bumped into a few tables and chairs before he got to where Holtzmann was. 

"You okay, buddy?" She asked, eyeing Kevin with curious amusement. 

"There's a pokéstop here," Kevin said, like that explained everything. It didn't, Holtzmann was more confused than ever. 

"There's a what?"

"Pokéstop," Kevin glanced up from his phone briefly, his fake glasses sliding down his nose and his floppy hair shielding his eyes when he looked down again. "You know, a place you get items?"

Holtzmann didn't know, and that bugged her. She didn't like not knowing.

"Kev, dude, what the hell are you talking about?" Holtzmann frowned, she was so used to having to think a little harder to understand what Kevin was talking about (he used the wrong words very often) but she just couldn't fathom what he was talking about now. 

"You know, Pokémon go?" Kevin showed Holtzmann the screen of his phone. A male avatar stood on what looked like a cartoonish rendition of the map of the school. Beside the avatar was a purple circle with pink smoke around it. She had no idea what this was. "You don't know Pokémon go?"

"No. I mean, I played Pokémon red and yellow when I was a kid but nothing since then. What is it?"

Kevin looked surprised, but was more than excited to get the chance to explain something to Holtzmann for a change. He explained everything, showing Holtz what he could on his phone and, honestly, Holtzmann was intrigued so she downloaded the app. 

"I went with Bulbasur," Kevin admitted when Holtz started up the game for the first time and was greeted with the three starter Pokémon she remembered from the games she played as a kid.

She went with charmander, she alway picked charmander, and just as she caught the Pokémon the bell rang. 

"We can go out after school, look for Pokémans." Kevin suggested and Holtzmann really didn't have the heart to tell him it would just be 'Pokémon'. 

"We have work,"

"After," Kevin waved a dismissive hand, taking a left as they left the classroom. 

Holtzmann headed right, not even needing to look up from her phone to know Kevin went the wrong way. "This way, Kevin."

They both worked at the same auto shop, say what you will about Kevin's extremely low IQ but the kid was good with his hands, it also helped that his uncle owns the garage. 

Holtzmann was hired a few weeks after she and Kevin became friends and his uncle quickly realised how much of an asset she really was. 

They were both waist deep under a car, Holtz with her overalls completely done up, rolled up at the sleeves, and Kevin with his wrapped around his waist, his white tee covered in grease and oil. 

"There is a bench at the park that is directly in between four pokéstops," Kevin said as Holtzmann strained to undo a bolt, whacking Kevin's hand away when he tried to help. "Do you maybe wanna go there after work?"

"Sure," Holtz agreed in a strained voice, huffing when it finally gave way.

By the time they had finished at work the sun was setting and Holtzmann was filthy they, she had changed back into her jeans and shirt but she still felt like she was covered in grease.

They took a seat on the bench and Kevin attached lure modules to each of the pokéstops because Holtzmann was only level two and couldn't help, though she did drop an incense. 

five Pokémon spawned within ten minutes (well, four new Pokémon. Holtz had only had the app for seven hours and she was already fed up with goddamn pidgeys and rattatas). An Eevee, a Bellsprout, a Jinx, and a bulbasur (which had Kevin all giddy at the prospect of being able to evolve his original bulbasur) ("it's not about how strong it is, I just wanna take my original to the top. He's my little leafy buddy.")

And, okay, maybe Holtzmann was having a lot of fun playing the fundamentally simple game. 

"Abby, you realise how dangerous it is to be in the park this late, don't you?” A voice snapped, catching both Holtzmann’s and Kevin’s attention.

“Someone has put lures on these Pokéstops, Erin.”

“I read that robbers are putting lures down to attract people and steal their phones.”

The sources of the voices came into view, rounding the corner, the three girls stopping when they spotted Holtz and Kevin.

“I can assure you we aren’t going to rob you guys.” Holtzmann assured, offering the group a smile.

“Yeah, we are just trying to catch Pokémans.” Kevin showed the screen to the girls, which had the tallest of them grinned, rushing over to sit beside Kevin on the bench, the girl with the glasses following closely behind her, leaving the tall, auburn-haired girl standing awkwardly.

“Come here often?” Holtzmann asked the girl, her lips hooking up in to a flirtatious little smile when the girl looked at her.

The girl just narrowed her eyes, not maliciously, Holtzmann noted, she looked more curious than anything.

“You not playing?” Holtzmann asked, holding her phone up.

“No, I am, I just- I read a lot of bad stories about people being out playing this late at night.” The girl explained, fidgeting nervously.

“Well, for what its worth, you are in a nice neighbourhood.” Holtzmann offered. “There hasn’t been a murder in, like, two months.”

That, apparently, wasn’t of any comfort to the girl, or anything, because Kevin nudged her shoulder, giving her a disapproving look. Maybe that is why she and Kevin were so good together; she was ridiculously book smart (a genius, actually) but she wasn’t very people smart. But Kevin was as smart as a plank of wood when it came to book stuff but with people, Kevin was a genius.

“What?” Holtz hissed at Kevin who didn’t answer, instead flashed the girl standing a smile.

“My name is Kevin, and this is Holtzmann.”

“I’m Erin,” Erin motioned toward herself before waving in the direction of her two friends. “And they are Abby and Patty.”

Abby and Patty glanced up, offering Holtzmann a little wave.

Holtzmann smiled in return, looking back at Erin who was still standing there awkwardly. Holtzmann scrambled to get off the bench and sit on the arm, almost falling off the bench as she did so, motioning for Erin to take a seat. Erin looked a little surprised, but moved to take a seat, her phone in hand.

“How long have you been playing?” Holtzmann asked, leaning her elbows on her knees, tilting her head curiously at Erin.

“Only four days, Patty got Abby and I into it.” Erin answered, tilting her head to look up at Holtzmann. “You?”

“Kev introduced me to it today,” Holtzmann nodded down at Erin’s phone. “Can I see?”

Erin nodded, holding her phone up for Holtzmann to have a look. 

“Level ten already.” Holtzmann noted, a little nod of approval. “Nice.” She hummed, bringing  her finger close to the screen of Erin’s phone, looking at the girl for approval. “Can I check your pokémon?”

“Sure,” Erin nodded so Holtzmann tapped the little Pokéball icon, then the pokémon symbol. The list when organised by CP and the top one was a 568cp Flareon.

“I always preferred Jolteon myself,” Holtzmann said. “But the sprite for Flareon looks sweet.”

“You don’t get a choice which Eeveelution you get out of it, but I agree, Jolteon is better.” Erin agreed, lifting her eyes to peer up at Holtzmann, who offered Erin a flirtatious little smirk.

“Well, you could say that there are sparks flying between us.” Holtzmann said coyly, shooting Kevin a glare over Erin’s head when he snorted at her terrible attempt at flirting. Honestly, she was usually a pretty decent flirt but this girl was ridiculously pretty, okay? She was having a little bit of a tough time staying cool, that doesn’t mean she couldn’t pretend that wasn’t completely freaking out over the pretty girl beside her.

“What level are you?” Erin asked unsurely, bringing Holtzmann attention back to her.  

“I’m only at level two,”

“What team are you going to choose?” 

Kevin had told her about the teams, shown her online what the specific ‘traits’ were for each of them (Kevin had chosen Instinct because of course he had) and, honestly, she was drawn to the red team.   

“Red, probably, who did you go with?”

“Blue.” Erin said, a little grin pulling onto her lips. “Apparently blue and red are enemies, forbidden from associating with one and other.”

“Well, you know what they say about forbidden,” Holtzmann smiled coyly, resting her chin on her fist and winking down at Erin. “There’s a charm about it that makes it unspeakably desirable.”

Holtzmann felt a little smug when she saw Erin’s throat wobble as she swallowed nervously. “Did you just hit on me with a Mark Twain quote?” Erin whispered.

“I did, and I am just as surprised as you are that the opportunity every came up.” Holtzmann laughed, which seemed to ease Erin’s nervous because she huffed out a laugh too, ducking her head shyly to look at her phone.

The girls seemed to realise how slow Kevin was because they seemed to dumb down whatever it was they were talking about whenever they were talking to him, but they didn’t mention anything, which Holtzmann was thankful for, these girls seemed nice, and Holtzmann didn’t want to have to go at them to defend Kevin (but she would have if needs be).

Patty, Abby and Erin attached lures to the four pokéstops after Kevin’s ran out, which resulted in them staying at that bench for another half an hour, which Holtzmann was more than happy to do because not only was this girl cute but she was clever, too, and, to Holtzmann, there was nothing more attractive then a smart woman.

Kevin, Abby and Patty were entirely immersed in the game while Holtzmann had her undivided attention on Erin, who seemed more than happy to be the object of Holtzmann’s attention, answering anything Holtzmann asked her (about school, and what she was going to university to study) and even asked Holtzmann a few questions of her own (she was more than a little surprised when she found out Holtzmann was a mechanic) (“Is it because I’m a girl? Girls can’t be mechanics?” Holtzmann had teased and Erin rolled her eyes, claiming that it wasn’t her gender but her age).

“We have to go, Holtz, my mum will be mad if I get home any later.” Kevin said after around an hour and ten minutes of being at the bench, standing up and stretching his arms over his head.

Holtzmann brought her attention away from Erin who was telling her a story about how she would be doing summer classes at Princeton this year to prepare her for university.

“Sure thing, Kev.” Holtzmann nodded, moving from her position on the arm of the bench, her arm stretched out along the back of the wood behind Erin (who had gotten all flustered and blushed when she had initially done so). “Well done on getting into Princeton, though, that’s awesome.”

“What University are you going to?” Erin asked, rushing to get to her feet when Holtzmann took a few steps away, receiving a snort from Abby and a ‘smooth’ from Patty. 

“MIT,”

“For engineering?” Erin asked and Holtzmann smiled.

“Yeah,” She nodded, “Well, engineering and physics. Nuclear physics.”

“That’s great,” Erin grinned widely. “Good luck.” 

Holtzmann nodded slowly, she wanted to ask this girl out, or to meet her here agin tomorrow, or even for her number but she really didn’t want to get rejected in front of everyone so she decided against it. “Yeah, you too.”

“You should probably…” Erin motioned off to Holtzmann left, making her glance in that direction to see Kevin walking that way, his head buried in his phone.

“Kev, buddy, thats the way back to the garage. Your house is this way.”

Kevin swung his leg around to do a complete one-eighty, walking back toward Holtzmann.

“Good night,” Holtzmann smiled, hopping onto Kevin’s back as he walked past her, which didn’t seem to phase the boy at all, one hand coming to grab onto Holtzmann thigh as he continued walking.

Holtzmann glanced over her shoulder once she was a few feet away, Abby and Patty were still immersed in the game but Erin was staring curiously after them, offering Holtzmann a shy smile and a wave when she noticed Holtzmann had turned to look at her.

“Why didn’t you get her number?” Kevin asked.

“I didn’t wanna get rejected in front of everyone.”

“She wouldn’t have rejected you, you was clearly into you.” Kevin laughed. “I mean, she laughed at your terrible jokes, anyone who laughs at any of your knock knock jokes is only laughing because they are attracted to you.”

“Research does say that someone who is attracted to you they will laugh more at the things you say.”

“See, even your sciency stuff agrees.” Kevin said. “You wanna go back and get her number?”

“Nah, thats weird. Just take me home, noble steed.”

So he did, carrying her the entire way, not dropping her until they were on her doorstep. Then he left with a promise to text her when she got home and that he would come pick her up in the morning.

And then she was alone, thankful that her father wasn’t home. She reclined back on her bed with her cat, Newton, kneading at her thighs to get comfortable and all she could think about was the beautiful girl with the pretty blue eyes and cute laugh. 

The more she thought about Erin the more the sense of regret settled in her stomach. She should have gotten her number, what was the worst the would've happened? The girl would've let her down easy (because Holtzmann could tell her was an inherently nice person) and that would've been that. But if she had said yes, that could have been the start of something great (at the very least there would have been one date). 

She text Kevin back after he had messaged her telling her that he was home, telling him that she maybe was starting to regret not getting Erin's number. 

He's reply was long, and mostly just a jumbled mess of Kevin's thoughts typed sporadically, but basically told Holtzmann that fate was a funny thing, and if it was going to happen it still would. 

To which she replied telling him to shut up and go to sleep. 

And anyone else probably would've been hurt at the dismissive message but Kevin knew better, sending her three laughing emojis and telling her they would go back to the bench at the same time tomorrow. 

And they did, Holtzmann, now level seven from the hours of Pokémon hunting she and Kevin had done that day, and Kevin settled at the bench the same time they had yesterday, setting up lures on the Pokéstops. 

It was a long shot, and Holtzmann honestly didn't think anything would come of it. And nothing did for the first round of lures, Holtzmann suggested they leave, walk around a little more but Levi. Shook his head and set up a few more lures.

("We are going to lure in this girl, Holtz. Get it? Lure."

"I do, buddy, well done.")

For the first half of the second round of lures there was nothing but Pokémon, and Holtz was starting to feel a little down about it, until she heard the sound of Patty's very distinct laugh. 

Holtzmann perked up at the sound, a smile stretching across her lips when Erin and her friends rounded the corner. 

"Told you," Patty said, patting Erin's back before moving to sit beside Kevin. 

Holtzmann stood up as Erin walked closer, offering her a seat of the bench. 

"Fancy meeting you here," Holtzmann grinned, watching Erin attentively as she took a seat. 

"You really lure me in," Erin joked and Holtzmann laughed, earning a glare from Kevin. 

"I made a similar joke and you didn't laugh,"

"Hers was funnier." Holtzmann hissed, ignoring Kevin as he murmured about scientific research she had been talking about the previous day. 

"How has you day been?" Holtzmann asked, completely ignoring Kevin, sliding up to sit on the arm of the bench. 

Erin looked a little surprised at the question, "I worked for most of it. What about you?"

"Kev and I went out Pokémon hunting, then went to work, then came here." Holtzmann answers. "Did you know it was us who put the lure down?"

"No," Erin hummed, shaking her head, looking almost nervous about the next words that were to leave her mouth. "I hoped, I suppose."

This has Holtzmann smiling a large, excited grin. "Yeah? I was hoping you would stop by, too."

"And we did," Erin commented with a nervous little laugh that, really, Holtzmann should probably find weird but it had her swooning. 

"Yeah," Holtzmann hummed, "Yeah, you did."

Erin smiled softly. "How was work?"

"Uneventful," Holtzmann shrugged, "I still feel like I'm covered in grease and car oil. You?"

"Boring,” Erin admitted, motioning toward Holtzmann’s phone. “How is it going?”

“Good, Kevin and I walked around for hours today, we went to Midtown, the pokémon there are amazing. Also,” Holtzmann turned her phone to show Erin the screen, pointing down to her team logo. “Valor.”

“Did you only go Valor so that you were on the opposite team as me?”

“Like I said last night, theres a thrill in the forbidden.” Holtzmann shrugged coyly, smiling when Erin grinned bashfully. “How are your Pokemon doing?”

“Oh,” Erin perked up, grinning excitedly as she unlocked her phone. “I hatched two ten kilometre eggs.” Erin showed Holtzmann her screen. “I got a ten twelve Aerodactyl and a ten twenty-one Lapras.”

“Holy fish-sticks, that Aerodactyl looks awesome.” Holtzmann gaped, her hand moving to cup the back of Erin’s that was holding the phone, tilting it so she could get a better look. “Your squad is looking amazing, by the way.”

When Holtzmann looked up at Erin she could see, even in the orange light of sunset, that her cheeks were tinted red, which made Holtzmann grin smugly, her fingers tracing patterns on the back of Erin’s hand as she used her other hand to scroll down Erin’s list of Pokémon.

“Where did you find Pikachu?” Holtzmann asked, looking at Erin through her eyelashes.

“Time square, we went there today to go to the M&M place.”

“We were in Time Square, too.” Holtzmann commented excitedly. “Early, though, because we had to get to work.”

“Have you been to Central Park yet?” Erin asked.

“No, not yet. You?”

“No, but we are planning on going at the weekend.”

“We could go at the weekend, too, Holtz.” Kevin offered.

“We work, Kevin.”

“Only until six, we can drive down after work.” 

“Maybe,” Holtzmann hummed. 

They stayed there for a little longer than they had the pervious night, Kevin whispering to her that she owed him so many lure modules but when it finally reached nine thirty they figured they should probably leave.

“Can I-“ Holtzmann started, just as Erin said ‘Would you mind if-‘.

“You go,” Erin offered with a nervously little laugh.

Holtzmann nodded, glancing at Abby and Patty, who were laughing at something Kevin had said, not paying them any mind. “Could I have your number?” Holtzmann blurted out, seemingly startling Erin a bit, but the girl quickly recovered, a smile pulling its way onto her lips. 

“Only if I can have yours?” She said, and it probably seemed a lot smoother, and a lot less cheesy, in her head but Holtzmann found it dorky and incredible endearing.

“Sure,” Holtzmann offered an embarrassed looking Erin her phone, accepting Erin’s in return, quickly typing her number into her phone, filing it under ‘Hot Holtzy’. “I will text you later tonight,” Holtzmann promised, handing Erin her phone back.

“I’ll be waiting,” Erin flirted back, and Holtzmann didn’t miss the ‘wtf’ look Erin gave herself when she thought Holtzmann was preoccupied with her phone.

“I won’t leave you waiting too long, sweetheart.” Holtzmann winked at Erin before turning to address Kevin, telling him they had to get going.

“Hopefully we see you here again tomorrow!” Kevin chirped in his infectiously happy voice, which had everyone else grinning and agreeing.

Holtzmann waited five minutes before messaging Erin.

Hot Holtzy [21:41]: Hope I didnt leave you waiting to long ;)

Erin Gilbert [21:43]: You didn’t, nice name, by the way

Hot Holtzy [21:44]: I thought it really embodied me as a person

[21:44]: are you guys still at the bench?

Erin Gilbert [21:45]: Yeah, Patty and Abby put down another round of lures. I think we are going home after that.

Hot Holtzy [21:46]: you want me to leave you to pokemon hunting?

Erin Gilbert [21:47]: Nah, I’m not really feeling it tonight. Do you have far to walk home?

Hot Holtzy [21:49]: Nah, ten minutes. I just realized I didn’t let you say what you were going to say earlier?

Erin Gilbert [21:50]: I was actually going to ask for your number, but you got there first :P

Hot Holtzy [21:52]: Ah, ok. I was feeling a little bummed last night when i didnt ask for your number and i wasn’t sure if i would see you again.

“Usually I don’t like being ignored.” Kevin commented, grinning down at Holtzmann when she peered up at him. “But I don’t mind because she was cute.”

“You are playing Pokemon, anyway.” 

Erin Gilbert [21:53]: Yeah, me too. Abby and Patty gave me a hard time on the entire walk home because I didn’t ask for your number

Hot Holtzy [21:55]: Yeah, Kevin offered to carry me back to the bench last night to get your number but that seemed a little weird so i decided not to.

Erin Gilbert [21:56]:It wouldn’t have been weird, I actually would’ve liked that

Hot Holtzy [21:58] I will keep that in mind for next time. Let me know once you get home?

“You should ask her on a date,” Kevin said as they came to a stop outside Holtzmann’s house. “She is clearly into you.”

“Maybe after I’ve been talking to her for a little while.” Holtz shrugged, gently punching Kevin’s arm. “See you in the morning.”

Holtzmann texted Erin until she fell asleep that night, right through school, and right up until she started work. She couldn’t wipe the dumb smile off her face the entire day, which resulted in her getting called out on more than one occasion by her teacher for day dreaming (which, who cares? She knew enough to teach almost all of her classes) (Every class but american history. She could tell you about wars, and gods, and mythology but she was useless at american history).

She was giddily awaiting eight o’clock, when she finished work, only to have her boss come to her five minutes before she finished to tell her she had to stay. A ‘high profile’ client had come in to get work done on his car (work that would take her at least four hours) and she had to have it done by morning (and, really, this guy was nice enough to give her a job, even when she wasn’t qualified, the least she could do was stay on for him).

“What about Erin?” Kevin asked as she set the car up on the lift.

“There’s nothing I can do, Kevin, I need to get this job done by morning.” Holtzmann sighed, undoing her coveralls, tying them around her waist, digging her oily hand through her hair. “I will text her and let her know. But you should still go, buddy, I know you are getting along pretty well with the other girls.”

“Okay, but maybe don’t texted them until I’m there? They might not show if you aren’t there.”

Holtzmann rolled her eyes, tucking her rag into the back of the waistband of her coveralls. “They like you too, Kevin. Just go, you can tell Erin that I won’t be there, saves me going to get my phone from my locker.”

“Fine,” Kevin grumbled, like this was her fault, like she was choosing to stay here.

“I’ll see you in the morning.”

Holtzmann worked quickly, thought efficiently, finally finishing the job at a little after midnight. She didn’t even bother getting changed, too exhausted to even bother, instead she just grabbed her things, locked up and headed home.

She checked her phone after she triple checked that everything was locked up properly, noticing two messages from Kevin and five from Erin.

Aussie Labrador [20:57]: She seemed really sad when you weren’t here

[21:12]: yup, def sad

Erin Gilbert [19:34]: I’m really looking forward to seeing you later. I hope you are having a good day at work:)

[20:56]: Kevin said you had to stay on at work, something about a gangsters car?

[20:58]: I hope you aren’t doing anything dangerous or illegal

[22:01]: I really missed you today, which sounds dumb considering it had only been two days…

[22:03]: sorry for the barrage of texts.

Mad Scientist [00:26]: god, dude, why did you tell Erin it was a gangsters car I was working on?

She typed out the quick reply to Kevin, who she knew would be in bed by now, before replying to Erin.

Hot Holtzy [00:29]: I was really looking forward to seeing you, too, I’m sorry I had to stay at work. I’m not involved with the gangsters, neither is the garage, boss just didn’t wanna get on the wrong side of them, you know? 

[00:30]: And I missed you too.

She didn’t really expect a reply, it was late on a school night, so she stuffed her phone into the pocket of her tattered leather jacket and picked up the pace to get home.

She dropped her bag at the door, stripping off her coveralls and t-shirt before she moved any further into the house, her father would kill her if she tracked grease into the house.

She startled when loud snoring came from the front room before rolling her eyes, putting her things into the barely running clothes washer, pulling on one of Kevin’s old Australian national team’s football jersey that he had left from one of the many times he had crashed there, then heading into the front room. 

She wish she could say she was the least bit surprised when she spotted the countless beer bottles scattered across the table and floor but she really wasn’t.

“Pops, it’s late, you should get to bed.” Holtzmann gently nudged the mans shoulder before getting to cleaning up, picking up as many beer bottles as she could and carrying them to the kitchen.

“You know,” Her dad started when she walked back into the front room, and Holtzmann felt her gut twist in anticipation of whatever harsh words her was about to hit her with. “It’s a good thing you like working at that garage because I can’t afford to send you to college, and I know you applied for that- that scholarship to MIT, but those only go to the kids who are clever enough.”

“They said I had a pretty good shot, pops.” Holtzmann spoke timidly, physically flinching when her dad laughed.

“Come on, kid, you know they have to say that, some bullshit about all kids being special. I just don’t want you to get your hopes up and get disappointed when you don’t get it.”

Holtzmann just nodded, picking up the remained of the bottles, throwing them into the trash and bracing herself against the kitchen counter, forcing herself to swallow the lump in her throat and blinked away the tears.

She waited until she heard her fathers bedroom door slam closed before making herself a sandwich and heading upstairs, grabbing her bag as she went.

Newton was waiting on her bed for her, stretching his body out and curling against her when she sat down on the edge of the bed. She pulled out her phone, a way of distracting herself from her fathers words that still seemed to sting. She was surprised to see message from Erin

Erin Gilbert [00:35]: Good, I’m glad you aren’t some kind of gang member ;) Did you get home okay?

Hot Holtzy [00:58]: I just got home now, just going to shower and go to bed. How was your night?

Holtzmann headed for a quick shower after sending the message, and within ten minutes she was back in bed, her hair wet and dressed in Kevin’s jersey and a pair of boxers.

The first thing she did was check her phone.

Erin Gilbert [01:03]:I’m glad you got home okay. Yeah, it was nice, Kevin is a sweetheart. You?

School was awful, work sucked, she had to stay late and her dad was a jerk so, all in all, her day sucked. The only redeeming thing was Erin. But, honestly, she couldn’t say that.

Hot Holtzy [01:21]: Yeah, my day was fine. It took a bit of a dip when I didn’t get to see you, though.

Erin Gilbert [01:23]: Tomorrow though, right?

Hot Holtzy [01:24]: If I don’t get forced to stay at work again then definitely

Erin Gilbert [01:25] Good. Kevin kept talking to me about you today, I think he felt bad that you couldn’t make it.

Holtzmann laughed, rolling her eyes at her best friend, scratching at Newton’s stomach when he curled up against her front, his head tucked under Holtzmann’s chin.

Hot Holtzy [01:27]: Oh, god, what was he saying?

Erin Gilbert [01:29]: Nothing bad, we could tell that he really idolizes you. He was telling us about how good of a mechanic you are. How good you are with your hands, he didn’t seem to understand the sexual innuendo behind his words

Hot Holtzy [01:31]: He is such a pure little puppy. He doesn’t understand a lot of innuendos, or sarcasm. But he’s trying and thats what really matters.

[01:32]: Why are you still awake anyway?

Erin Gilbert [01:34]: He is just so naturally nice, I didn’t think there was people out there like him. I’m talking to you

Hot Holtzy [01:35]: Yeah, he really is a special breed of human. Do you want me to leave you to sleep?

Erin Gilbert [01:36]: No, not unless you are tired?

She was. She was exhausted but she knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep for a while, not with the words of her father still running through her head.

Hot Holtzy [01:37]: I’m not tired either. can I call you?

Holtzmann’s phone buzzed in her hand a few seconds later and she cleared her throat, which still felt a little heavy from earlier, before answering.

“Ahoy,” She whispered, grinning when Erin laughed quietly.

“Hey,”

“You should be asleep,” Holtzmann whispered, trying to sound serious but even she could hear the smile in her own voice.

“So should you be, you are the one who worked an extra four hours.”

“I’m fine, I’m just spooning Newton in bed.”

“I’m hoping that is the name of one of your pets.”

“No, no. I hopped a plane to England and got sir Isaac Newton. They air hostesses gave me a few funny looks when I strapped him into the seat next to me, though.”

“I’m surprised they let him on the flight, I hear he is a deadweight.” Erin shot, and Holtzmann Holtzmann couldn’t stop herself from laughing a little to loudly, she had been taken by surprise by the joke, but she definitely welcomed it, nothing was nicer than having someone you could joke back and forth with.

“That was a terrible joke,” Holtzmann snorted.

“It made you laugh, that is a win to me.”

They ended up talking about school, or at least Erin did, Holtzmann didn’t mind just listening to everything Erin had to say. And, honestly, she was interested,she wanted know everything but she was exhausted, and there was something very calming about Erin’s voice so, as much as she fought it, Holtzmann fell asleep, Newton tucked against her chest and Erin talking in her ear.

Chapter Text

She woke up the following morning and she really struggled to open her eyes, a tired smile spreading across her lips when she noticed she had a message from Erin. She knew, deep down, that it wasn't good to get this attached this fast (it had been three goddamn days), but she pushed the thought away and picked up her phone.

Erin Gilbert [02:34]: Either you lied about not being tired or I am extremely boring :P

Hot Holtzy [06:50]: I can assure you that you are not boring, and I want to know every little thing about you and i wasn’t tired at first but there is something very relaxing about your voice

[06:50]: can’t wait to see you tonight

Holtzmann got changed quickly, throwing her wavy hair up into a hair tie and grabbing her stuff, leaving her house at seven fifteen, just as Kevin drove up to the curb outside her house.

Kevin seemed to realise immediately that something was wrong with her because he frowned over at her curiously.

“It’s nothing,” Holtzmann assured.

“I don’t believe you.”

“He was drunk, it doesn’t matter.” Kevin’s jaw set as he peered over Holtzmann’s shoulder towards her house. “Honestly, Kev, let’s just go.”

“Fine,” Kevin sighed, starting his car again.

Holtzmann told him what her father said (and Kevin had scoffed, claiming Holtzmann was the smartest person he knew) and they didn’t talk about it again, but Kevin did show up at the chemistry room with a tube of Pringles and a bottle of doctor pepper (both of Holtzmann’s favourites) and then sat in silence beside her.

“What he said, it’s not true.” Kevin spoke out of the blue.

Holtzmann didn’t look up from the homework she wasn’t doing, tapping her pen against her lips. “We will see if it is true or not.”

“Should I be worried?”

“He goes away on Sunday for a few weeks,”

“That’s not an answer.”

“Please just let it go, Kevin.”

Kevin didn’t seem happy about it but he dropped it anyway, going back to his phone.

—

They went to the bench a little later that night, Erin, Abby and Patty were already there, and when Erin spotted them turning the corner she perked up, smiling at Holtzmann.

“Erin thought you were going to stand her up again.” Patty said, laughing when Erin punched her arm. “What? You were.”

“I would never stand Erin up without good reason.” Holtzmann replied, perching herself on the arm of the bench, allowing Erin to sit.

“Good,” Patty gave Holtzmann a warning look, and Holtzmann felt a little intimidated, but relaxed when the girl smiled at her, reaching over to gently punch Holtzmann arm. “I’m kidding, Holtzy, relax.” 

Holtzmann smiled, but Erin seemed to spot her anxiety because she nudged Holtzmann’s knee with her elbow, nodding questioningly at Holtzmann.

Holtzmann smiled down at Erin, “You look nice.”

Erin blinked in surprise, looking down at herself, dressed in a pair of black jeans and a black and white stripped shirt. “Oh, thank you.”

“I mean, you’ve always looked nice, but I’ve never told you before.” 

Erin tucked her hair shyly behind her ear, “Thank you. You look nice, too.”

“I’m sure the greasy hair, pre-work looks very attractive.” 

“Well, its definitely not unattractive.”

“Erin Gilbert,” Holtzmann gasped, pretending to be scandalised as she whispered. “Do you have a thing for grease monkeys?”

Erin glared playfully at Holtzmann, “Don’t let anyone hear you say that. I’m supposed to be a clean, good girl.”

“Those are the ones you need to keep any eye on.” Holtzmann grinned flirtatiously, resting her chin on her palm, fluttering her eyelashes at Erin.

Honestly, pokemon go had taken a totally back seat during these visits to the bench, it was the perfect spot for players of the game she was very quickly becoming addicted to but Holtzmann couldn’t pull her attention away Erin.

Erin, it appeared, was more addictive than Pokemon Go.

She knew this was one of her flaws, her father had told her so, she got too into people too quickly. She got her heart broken on more than one occasion by falling for a straight girl too quickly, just because they show her the slightest bit of kindness or attention. 

And she knew it was happening again, with Erin. Worse than it had ever been before, and it was kind of terrifying.

They stayed at the bench until around half ten, Holtzmann’s attention entirely on Erin, and as soon as they left she was texting Erin, which had Kevin teasing her. 

Erin Gilbert [23:24]: What was that with Patty?

Holtzmann know the question was coming, she was surprised it took so long to come up.

Hot Holtzy [23:26]: Nothing. I just want your friends to like me and I was a little bummed that she didn’t

Erin Gilbert [23:27]: Well, they do like you. You make me smile and thats enough for them

Holtzmann grinned against her pillow at that message, holding off on messaging back when the three little dots appeared on her screen.

Erin Gilbert [23:28]: and that sounded really cheesy

Hot Holtzy[23:30]: No thats fine. Cheesy is good, I like cheesy

[23:31]: and you make me smile, too.

Erin Gilbert [23:33]: Good, I’m glad :) I really want to stay up and talk but I have a test tomorrow.

Hot Holtzy [23:36]: Go to sleep then! And good luck, I’m sure you’re going to nail it

Erin Gilbert [23:40]: Thank you :) Goodnight, Holtzy xx

Hot Holtzy [23:41]: G’night, sweetheart :)xx

—

They hung out at that same bench every night for the next five days and it was on the Saturday night that Holtzmann got home, (all giddy from arranging to, maybe, go out the following week with Erin. Somewhere that wasn’t a bench.) and she found her father sitting on the couch, a bottle of beer in his hand.

“You were out late.” He commented.

“Yeah, I was hanging out with a few friends.” Holtzmann said, moving toward the kitchen, leaning against the doorframe, focusing on her phone as she typed out a message to Erin.

“Friends?” Her father snorted. “Your only friend is that doppy kid down the street. Where you with a girl?”

“I was with Kevin and a girl, yeah. A few girls”

“This girl can’t be attracted to you, kid.” The man grumbled and Holtzmann ignored him, choosing to start down at her phone instead of looking at her dad. “Let’s be really, Jillian, you are weird. No one is attracted to weird.”

“I know, pops.”

“You’ve done this before, and you always get your heart broken. I don’t understand why you keep letting yourself feel like this.” The man grumbled, taking a swig of his beer. “It’s better not to feel anything.”

“Like you?” Holtzmann shot back, and her father peered over the back of the couch lazily.

“Exactly. Why do you think I drink so much? Not because I enjoy it.”

“So, you are saying I should drink myself into oblivion like you?”

“Alcohol, drugs, whatever you vice is, don’t matter.” The man waved his hand dismissively. “Anything helps.”

“I think you’ve had enough, pops.”

“I think you don’t get to tell me when I’ve had enough.” The man growled, his grip on his bottle tightening. “It’s your fault it is like this.”

Holtzmann felt her gut twist, knowing exactly where this was going. It had gone in this direction plenty of times before. Of course, he never remembers.

“It’s your fault she’s gone.” Her father murmured against the opening of the bottle. 

“It’s not.” Holtzmann argued sheepishly.

“It is entirely your fault.” He snapped, on his feet within seconds, wheeling around to face Holtzmann who flinched, her eyes dropping to the floor. “You,” He jabbed his finger in Holtzmann’s direction. “Are the reason she was out that night.”

“I was a kid.” Holtzmann whispered.

“Don’t matter. You — You need to take more responsibility for your actions.” He pointed her at Holtzmann, taking a swing of her beer before dropping the empty bottle onto the wooden table. “Clean up, will you?”

Holtzmann stood entirely still until she heard the door upstairs slam closed, then she reached into her pocket for her phone, pulling up Erin’s number.

“I was just about to call you,” Erin greeted, and a smile pulled it’s way onto her lips at the sounds of her voice. 

“Well, not fast you’re last.” Holtzmann laughed.

Erin was quiet for a seconds, “What’s wrong?”

“What’d you mean?”

“You sound funny. Is everything okay?” Erin questioned. “Did something happen to you on the way home?”

“No, I’m fine, honestly.”

“Are you home?” Erin asked and Holtzmann’s stomach twisted because she sounded like she genuinely cared.

“Yeah, I just got home.”

“Holtz,” Erin sighed and Holtzmann waited for whatever she was going to say next, letting herself fall back onto the sofa. “I’m not going to push but if there is anything you ever want to talk about I’m here.”

Holtzmann released a breath through her nose and swallowed. “Okay,”

“I care about you.” Erin admitted quietly.

Holtzmann swallowed against, sitting forward, her elbows on her knees and she raked her hand through her hair. “I, uh, I need to go.”

“Okay. Goodnight, Holtz.”

“G’night, Erin.”

Holtzmann ended the call, throwing her phone onto the table and cleaning up her fathers mess, dumping it all into the garbage can outside.

Newton was on her bed, as usually, purring and stretching out when he spotted her, rubbing his head against her back when she sat on the edge of the bed.

Hot Holtzy [22:41]: I’m sorry

[22:41]: I care about you, too

Erin Gilbert [22:43]: It’s okay, Holtz, don’t feel like you have to apologise for feeling sad or overwhelmed. Just remember I’m here if you need to talk about anything

Hot Holtzy [22:46]: thanks. Same goes for you.

Erin Gilbert [22:48]: Are you working tomorrow? We are going to central park at around eleven, I would really like for you to come along.

Hot Holtzy [22:49]: I would really really like to come, spending time with you not at that bench is something I really wanna do, but I work from eight tomorrow morning 

Erin Gilbert [22:51]: Yeah, I figured.

[22:52]: You work too much, by the way

Hot Holtzy [22:54]: Gotta make that, green, Gilly. That’s what makes the world go round ;)

[22:56]: but how about I take thursday of next week off? we can go see a movie, then I can take you to this little diner that my mom used to take me to when I was a kid. It’s not grand or fancy but their milkshakes are great and they make great burgers.

Erin Gilbert [22:59]: Yeah, that sounds really nice, actually. I haven’t had a good burger in forever

Hot Holtzy [23:02]: It’s nothing special, pretty run down actually. But I will take you out to a fancier place another time, I promise.

Erin Gilbert [23:04]: I don’t need to be wine and diners, Holtz, I just want to spend time with you.

Hot Holtzy [23:06]: You might not need it but you deserve it 

[23:07]: Besides, everyone likes an excuse to dress up

Erin Gilbert [23:09]: I imagine you scrub up pretty well

[23:11]: I know this might sound dorky or cheesy or whatever but I haven’t smiled this much in a long time, and thats down to you

Holtzmann smiled giddily at that message, letting herself fall face first into her pillow laughing quietly when Newton crawled onto her back, pressing his paws against her shoulders.

She took a few seconds to regain her composure before messaging Erin back.

Hot Holtzy [23:15]: I do rock a mean suit. And same, I have never been more excited about getting to know someone as I am with you

Erin Gilbert [23:16]: I was so worried we weren’t on the same page with this. That maybe you weren’t into me as anything more than a friend

[23:16]: You are into me as more than a friend, right?

Hot Holtzy [23:18]: are kidding me? I thought I was being blatantly obvious that i was into you

Erin Gilbert [23:20]: That’s probably why Patty and Abby have been calling me oblivious :P

[23:21]: Does that mean thursday is a date?

Hot Holtzy [23:22]: Only if you want it to be, I don’t want you feeling force into anything you don’t wanna do

Erin Gilbert [23:23]: I definitely want it to be

Hot Holtzy [23:24]: Good,I was hoping you did :)

—

Holtzmann was feeling a little bummed heading to work the following day, because she knew she could have been at central park hanging out with Erin and her friends instead of being waist deep in a car.

Which, honestly, she usually loved. Searching for a problem within the machine and the gratification of fixing said problem was something she thrived on, she found it very easy to get lost in a machine like the engine of a car.

But, these days, she couldn’t get her mind off of Erin, and not even her fascination with every new engine that came int the shop could take her mind off of Erin.

It was around three when she heard a car roll up outside, then a light knock on the hood of the car she was under. She knew she was probably the only one out in the front of the garage, Kevin was painting a car somewhere in the back and her boss was probably asleep in his office.

“I will be with you in a sec,” Holtzmann called from under the car, tightening up everything she had been working on before sliding out from under the car, wiping her hands on the greying white v-neck shirt she was wearing, lifting her goggles to sit on her head as she looked up, a grin pulling onto her lips when her eyes landed on Erin.

Erin looked a little surprised when she spotted Holtzmann, her eyes raking down Holtzmann’s body and, judging by the dazed look in her eyes and the faint blush on her cheeks, she appreciated the greaser look.

“You following me, Gilly?” Holtzmann asked with a flirtatious smile, tucking her rag into the waistband of her tied up coveralls.

“Hm?” Erin pulled her eyes up to Holtzmann’s, blinking a few times before shaking her head. “No, I need my oil changed.”

“No problem, I will just get my tool and be right out.”

Erin was waiting by her car when Holtzmann came out, her eyes rolling down Holtzmann’s body again, which had Holtzmann smirking, stopping beside Erin as she walked to the car. “You have a thing for dirty greasers.” She stated, winking at Erin and brushing past her.

“How, uh, how long will it take?”

“Usually, around an hour but, because I’m doing it, it shouldn’t take longer than twenty minutes.” Holtzmann grinned cockily.

Erin nodded slowly, watching Holtzmann attentively. “Do you want to hang out at my place tonight?” Erin didn’t even seem to realise she was speaking until she had asked, looking surprised at her own boldness.

“Sure, that’d be nice.” Holtzmann agreed, popping the hood, bending at her hips to peer inside. “Do you want coffee or anything?”

The lack of an answer from Erin made Holtzmann glance over her shoulder, smirking when she noticed Erin staring shamelessly at her ass, her head tilted to the left.

“Nice view, huh?”

Erin’s eyes jerked up to Holtzmann’s, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-

“No, it’s cool. Awesome. It’s nice to know I’m attractive to you.”

Erin frowned at that, and Holtzmann realised that maybe she said to much. “Of course you are.”

Holtzmann nodded, “Are you having any other problems with your car?”

“Yeah, there’s a squeaking from the engine when it’s running.”

“I will have a look while the coil is draining.” Holtzmann promised, “It is probably just the serpentines belt slipping, I will fix the tension.”

“Erin,” Kevin greeted happily, almost giddy to see the girl. Holtz would be worried if he wasn't so into men.  “Are you here to see Holtz?”

“I’m here to get my car fixed, but seeing Holtz was a definite bonus.” Erin flashed Holtzmann a grin. Holtzmann grinned back, turning her attention back to the car.

“Can I get you coffee? It is on the garage.”

“On the house,” Holtzmann corrected.

“But this isn’t a house, it’s a garage.”

“Doesn’t matter, buddy.”

“Coffee would be nice, Kevin. Black, two sugars.” Erin smiled at the boy who nodded, rushing off to get her coffee.

“I feel like I should warn you that Kevin’s coffee is awful.” Holtzmann set the jack under the car and started pumping, lift the car until its wheels were a few inches off the ground, glancing back at Erin when she didn’t reply. She laughed quietly when she noticed the girl openly staring at her toned arms. “Did you come here just to perv on me while I work?”

“You are a lot more… toned than I thought you would’ve been.” Erin muttered, chewing on the skin on her bottom lip, pulling her eyes up to look into Holtzmann’s. “It’s attractive. You are attractive.”

“Keep talking like that and I won’t get any work done.” Holtzmann said as she set up the jack stand. She wasn’t used to not having anything flirtatious to say back, she wasn’t used to being called attractive, she wasn’t used to being so flustered.

“Here you go,” Kevin chirped, carefully offering Erin her coffee. “That's Holtzmann’s mug.” Erin turned the mug to get a better look at what it said. ’#1 best friend’ and on the back there was a selfie, taken by Kevin, part of his finger was covering the photo and it looked like he had ambushed Holtzmann under car while she worked as her face was covered in oil and she had her goggles on. Kevin was grinning proudly when Erin looked back at him, his chest puffed out and his head high. “I got it for her birthday.”

“It’s cute,” Erin smiled, glancing at Holtzmann who was setting up a bucket under the car to catch the oil drain off.

“He took that photo while I was six hours in on a job, I was exhausted.”

“You look good,” Kevin waved his hand dismissively, and Holtzmann flipped him off, lying back on the Dolly, rolling herself under the car, socket wrench in hand to undo the oil cap and allow the oil to run into the bucket. “We both do.”

Holtzmann rolled out from under the car the car, peering up at Erin, her goggles positioned over her eyes. “Kev, buddy, don’t you have work to do?”

“Oh, yeah, I’m detailing a car.” Kevin nodded, practically skipping back to his work.

Holtzmann hopped to get feet, wiping her hands on her shirt. “I will have a look at that belt while the oil is draining.” Holtzmann disappeared under the hood of the car, asking, “How has your day been?”

“Okay, we drove down to central park but we couldn’t stay long.” 

“Did you catch anything new?”

“I found a Growlith,”

“No way,” Holtzmann’s eyes lit up and she wheeled around to Erin. “Can I see?”

Erin nodded, setting her coffee down on Holtzmann’s toolbox and pulling out her phone. Holtzmann wiped off her hands, peering over Erin’s shoulder at her phone. Holtzmann watched Erin as she faltered when Holtzmann’s breath washed across her neck, but she quickly regained her composure, pulling up her Pokémon list.

“Oh, you got a gastly, too.”

Erin nodded, “Yeah, found him just as we were leaving.” She said in a strained voice, which had Holtzmann grinning smugly.

“You okay?” Holtzmann questioning in a low whisper, running her tongue along her bottom lip when Erin turned to look at her, which pulled Erin’s attention down to her lips.

“M’fine.”

“Holtzmann, what have I told you about flirting with customers.” Her boss called from inside the garage. “Get back to work, kid.”

“Duty calls,” Holtzmann smiled, giving Erin’s lower back a little tap and moving away from her, getting back to work.

She asked Erin questions as she worked, listening attentively to the answers. She even asked Erin to hand her some tools, which she did, giving her the correct tool most of the time.

“Okay, you are done.” Holtzmann hopped to her feet, wiping her hands and slinging the rag over her shoulder. 

“How much do I owe you?”

“Fifty bucks, the serpentine belt is covered by the pretty girl discount.” Holtzmann winked at Erin, dropping the hood of her car.

“Smooth, how many women have you given that discount to?” Erin arched her eyebrows at Holtzmann as she got her money out. 

“Would you believe me if I said you were the first?” Holtzmann tried to sound playfully, but it came off a little more serious that she had initially intended.

“After what your boss said? I’m not so sure.”  It was a playful jab, not malicious at all, but Holtzmann immediately felt like she should defend herself.

“Your different,” Was not what she had intended on saying, she had planned on saying it in a round about way, tell Erin that flirting with the other costumers was the way to get a good tip, and what she was doing with Erin was much more than that. But, once again, her absolute lack of a filter came into play.

“I’m different?”

Holtzmann nodded slowly, glancing back at the entrance to the garage, making sure her boss wasn’t still hanging around, before reaching out to take ahold of Erin’s hand. “You’re different.”

“Are you still coming to my place tonight?” Erin asked, allowing Holtzmann to pull her in closer.

“Yeah, you will need to message me the address.” Holtzmann whispered.

“I can pick you up here, after work?” Erin offered, her bottom lip quivering  slightly at the close proximity of Holtzmann, who had pulled Erin in so close that she could feel Holtzmann’s breath on the underside of her chin.

“Okay. I will be filthy, though.”

“That’s- I don’t mind.”

“I bet,” Holtzmann commented in a gruff voice, her lips hooking up into a smirk.

“Holtzmann!” Holtzmann startled, quickly taking a step away from Erin, cleaning her throat and running her hand through her hair. “I swear to god, kid, if you cost me a lawsuit there will be trouble.”

Holtzmann laughed under her breath, rolling her eyes at her boss. “I guess, to be continued.”

“When do you finish?”

“Six,”

“Okay, I will see you then.” 

Holtzmann nodded, making sure to keep a fair distance from Erin, knowing her boss was most definitely watching her from the security camera in his office.

Erin was there at six on the dot, smiling at Holtzmann when she hopped into the passengers side of her car. 

It didn’t cross Holtzmann’s mind that she was about to meet Erin’s parents until Erin drove into the driveway and Holtzmann spotted who she assumed was Erin’s father at the door to the garage, messing with what looked like an old sit on lawnmower.

“Hey, dad.” Erin called, and the man glanced up, doing a double take when he noticed Erin wasn’t alone.

“Hey, sweetie. Who’s this?”

“This is Holtzmann.”

“Ah, the Pokemon girl.” The man grinned when Erin rolled her eyes, holding his hands up to show Holtzmann his oil covered palms. “I would shake your hand but I’ve been wrestling with this thing for an hour and I’m a mess.”

“Are you having problems getting it started?”

“I did get it started then it cut off a few seconds later.” The man shrugged. “I honestly don’t know anything about machines, I’m a bioengineer, not a proper engineer.”

“I could have a look?” Holtzmann offered, glancing at Erin who smiled softly at her.

“Oh, you don’t have to do that.”

“Honestly, I don’t mind.” Holtzmann assured, sliding off her leather jacket, handing it to Erin when she held her hand out. 

“Holtzmann works at the garage a few blocks over.”

“Oh, okay. Well, thank you.”

“Has it been misfiring?” Holtzmann asked, rolling up the sleeves of her shirt, crouching down beside the from of the mower, lifting up the casing to have a look at the engine.

“Yeah,”

“It sounds like you have a dirty spark plug.” Holtzmann hummed, “Do you have a ratchet or a gap gauge? I will take it out and have a look.”

“We have a very modest tool set in there,” The man motioned into the garage and Holtzmann nodded, heading inside and routing around in the small toolbox, grabbing the gap gauge.

Someone else was outside when Holtzmann reappeared, a woman who looked like an older version of Erin. She smiled brightly at Holtzmann when she spotted her.

“You must be Holtzmann, it is lovely to meet you.” Holtzmann quickly shifted the tool from her right hand to her left, to allow her to shake the woman’s hand.

“It’s nice to meet you, ma’am.”

“Thank you for taking a look at the mower, my husband is useless when it comes to machines.” Julia glanced at her husband who shrugged.

“It’s not a problem. I think it is just a dirty spark plug so I should have it up and running in ten minutes.”

It did turn out to be a dirty spark plug so Holzmann cleaned it while Erin sat on the mower, telling Holtzmann a little more about her parents and younger brother.

Holtzmann listened attentively and, honestly, Erin seemed to have the perfect Family dynamic (though anything would look perfect in comparison to her family dynamic).

“What about you?” Erin asked as Holtzmann screwed the spark plug back into the engine. “What are your parents like?”

“My mom died when I was a kid and my dad is a truck drivers, so he is away often.” Holtzmann shrugged, standing up straight and motioned for Erin to start the mower. “Give it a go.”

“What happened to your mom?” Erin asked curiously.

“Can we maybe talk about it another time?”

“Of course,” Erin smiled reassuringly, turning the key in the mower that rumbled to a start. “Wow, Kevin was right about you being good with your hands.”

“You have no idea,” She grinned, winking at Erin just as Erin’s father appeared at the front door, a large smile on his face. “It was your spark plug, sir, I cleaned it so she should last for a few hours but you will need to replace it after today. I can get you one from the garage tomorrow and give it to Erin.”

“I would have no idea how to change a spark plug,” The man laughed. “But thank you, Holtzmann.”

“I’m sure Erin would be able to do it after watching me, right?” Holtzmann grinned over at Erin who quickly shook her head.

“I wasn’t paying attention to that part.” Erin huffed, and Holtzmann smirked over at her, knowing exactly what Erin had been focused on while she was undoing the spark plug. 

“And just what were you paying attention to, Erin?” Her father asked,a little smile on his face as he arched his eyebrow at his daughter. 

“Dad, enough.” Erin huffed, her cheeks tinted pink at her fathers teasing.

Holtzmann grinned at that, looking up at Erin’s father, who was also grinning. “Would you like some dinner, Holtzmann? I am making Italian sausage and tortellini skillet. It’s the least I can offer for you fixing the mower.”

“That sounds nice, sir.” Holtzmann glanced at Erin to make sure that it was okay she stay for dinner, smiling when Erin nodded. “I would love to stay for dinner.”

“Great. It will be out once Julia finishes cutting the grass.”

Erin lead Holtzmann into the house, directing her to her ensuite bathroom to clean up.

“Where is your brother?” Holtzmann questioned as she washed the dirt off her hands, glancing over her shoulder at Erin, who was standing in the doorway.

“In his room, probably.” Erin shrugged, “My parents liked you.”

“I have a way with parents,” Holtzmann grinned smugly, drying her hands off and turning to Erin, walking closer to her.

“Clearly,” Erin smiled softly, reacting up to touch Holtzmann’s cheek once she was close enough. She waited a few seconds, gauging Holtzmann’s reaction before dipping down, pressing a kiss to Holtzmann’s lips, lingering there for a few seconds.

When she pulled back Holzmann’s eyes remained closed, her mouth hanging opening slightly.

“Oh,” Holtzmann muttered, swallowing thickly, forcing her eyes to flutter opened. “What was that for?”

“I wanted to. As a thank you for fixing my car and the mower.”

“Okay, sexual favours in return for a service is actually frowned upon in almost all cultures so lets not do that.” Holtzmann teased, laughing when Erin nudged her arm. “I’m kidding, you can do that any time you want.”

“I will keep that in mind.” 

“You can do it again now.” Holtzmann offered, cocking a challenging eyebrow at Erin. “If you want?”

“I want,” So she did and this time Holtzmann was prepared, her hands running around the waistband of Erin’s jeans to link at her lower back while Erin’s hand cupped her jaw. 

Holtzmann pushed on Erin’s lower back to draw her closer, smiling against Erin’s lips when she felt Erin’s fingertips trace her cheek.

“I feel like I should e-mail Niantic and thank them for making Pokémon Go.” Holtzmann whispered, smiling when Erin laughed quietly, her thumb tracing Holtzmann’s jawline.

“Do you want to watch something on Netflix before dinner?”

-- 

Erin’s family were already at the table when they headed down, her little brother talking animatedly about something.

“— so many different ways you can build it.”

Both of Erin’s parents were listening attentively to the young boy, nodding along as he spoke.

“I don’t think i will be able to build anything super cool but I think I can build a little car.”

Erin’s dad noticed them first, smiling brightly at them. “Holtzmann works with machines, Jasper.” He said as Erin and Holtzmann took a seat across from the young boy.

“Really?”

Holtzmann nodded, “I work in a garage not to far from here.”

“Oh, could you help me build my electric car?”

“Buddy, I think Holtzmann is busy.” Julia commented softly.

“I don’t mind,” Holzmann assured, glancing quickly at Erin. “If your sister doesn’t mind.”

“Please, Erin,” Jasper pouted at his sister, who rolled her eyes dramatically.

“Fine,” She sighed, flashing Holtzmann a reassuring smile. 

“You can show me the kit you got after dinner.” Holtzmann offered and Jasper smiled widely, stabbing his fork into his food and taking a large mouthful.

Holtzmann felt a little out of her element throughout the meal, she knew it was going to be strange, sitting around a table and eating as a family, what she didn’t expect was the easy flowing conversation and the joking around. It was strange seeing a family dynamic that wasn’t snide comments and angry glares.

It was strange seeing a loving family.

Holtzmann and Erin followed Jasper to his room, Holtzmann listening attentively as Jasper talked excitedly about this car.

Erin just watched on with a soft smile as Holtz explained how the circuit boards worked while they put the small car together.

By the time they had finished building an relatively impressive looking car, after about two hours, Jasper was staring up at Holtz like she hung the stars in the sky.

Erin could understand where he was coming from.

They played with the car on the landed for half an hour after building the it before Holtzmann had to leave.

“I would really prefer if you let me drive you home, Holtz.” Erin sighed, gripping onto Holtzmann’s hand and giving it a little squeeze.

“My house isn’t far,” Holtzmann assured, her thumb running across Erin’s knuckles. “Besides, I need to walk off that incredible dinner and hatch some eggs.”

“Holtz,” Erin started to argue but Holtzmann stopped her, gently pulling her closer and planting a kiss on Erin’s cheekbone.

“I will text you when I get home, sweetheart.” Holtzmann whispered against the skin of Erin’s cheek before moving away and bouncing down the steps.

“Fine,” Erin grumbled.

“Yes you are,” Holtzmann threw a wink and kittenish smile over her shoulder as she made her way down the path.

“Please walk fast.”

“I thought I would give you time to enjoy the view.” Holtzmann called back, but sped up under Erin’s request.

Her phone buzzed before she even reached the end of Erin’s street.

“Honey, I like spending time and talking with you too, but I didn’t realise you were so needy.” Holtzmann teased as a greeting, grinning when Erin chuckled. 

“You can hang up as soon as you’re home.”

“Women are clingy,” Holtzmann sighed playfully.

“You included,” Erin shot back and Holtzmann heard her shift, probably getting more comfortable on her bed. “Tell me more about what you were talking to Jasper about tonight? The electric lock you built?”

“When I was a kid?”

“Yeah,” Erin hummed. “I wanna hear about it?”

“It wasn’t much, my grandpa and I built a treehouse in my back yard and I was worried kids around the neighbourhood would sneak in so I built a lock that I connected to an old RC car controlled I had. I put it on the inside andI would used the controller to unlock it from the outside, you could also unlock it from the inside in case I was inside and the signal dropped for some reason.” Holtzmann explained, sounding as if building a radio controlled lock was something kids done on the regular.

“How old were you?” 

“I dunno, maybe around eight. I started building it when I was seven but it took me a good few months to build.”

“You sound very nonchalant about building something at seven that most adults can’t even do.”

“I’m sure said adults could do something at seven that I can’t do now.” Holtz dismissed and that both irked and saddened Erin.

“Holtz, you are an incredible engineer already, and you haven’t even been to college yet. Once you go to college and they teach you whatever is left for youth learn you are going to do some incredible things.”

“Of course I am, I’m awesome.”

It should sound obnoxious, big headed, but it didn’t sound like either because Erin could tell Holtzmann didn’t believe a single word she was saying.

“You really are.” Erin said softly.

“When do you get to go see you accommodation at Princeton?” Holtzmann asked, both curious and trying to change the subject.

Erin let her. “The end of next month, them I move in two weeks after. When are you heading to MIT?”

“End of July.” Holtz replied, “Will I be able to come visit while you are there for summer school?”

“Better yet, why don’t you come up with me while I am going up to visit?” Erin offered. “My parents are working so I would just be driving up on my own. Two hour road trip, we will be stopping over in the dorm I will be sleeping in, I will even treat you to breakfast.”

“You sure know how to make a girl swoon, Gilly.” Holtzmann jested. “But, yes, it’d really like to come along.”

“Just call me casanova,” 

Erin told Holtzmann her plans for college as she walked home, and Holtzmann felt a weight lift from her chest when she entered her house to see her fathers truck gone and the back her had packed that morning also gone. Sometimes his trips would get cancelled so Holzmann didn’t let herself relax until she knew for sure he was gone.

“You’re home alone tonight?” Erin asked as Holtz set her phone on loudspeaker and began getting changed.

“For the next two weeks, yeah.” Holtzmann pulled off her shirt, chucking it in the direction of her laundry basket. “My dad always leaves the place in a mess so I’m going to clean it up tonight. Maybe you can come by after work tomorrow?”

“Yeah, that sounds good.”

“Kevin said he would be meeting with your friends anyway,” Holtzmann kicked her jeans off, pulling on her New York Rangers jersey. “They seem to be getting along well.”

“Patty and Abby love him, they say he’s a real sweetheart. Patty is even planning on hooking him up with the kid in her apartment building.”

“That’d be cool, Kevin really deserves someone but it’s hard to find someone. Kevin is a sweetheart but he is hard work sometimes, you know?”

“You guys really seem to have a special bond.”

“Yeah, we both kinda became friends when we were both going through some things, it kind of formed strong bond really fast.” Holtzmann settled on her bed, stretching out on her front with a groan.

“I will let you sleep,”

“Maybe you should stay over tomorrow?” Holtz offered. “I’m a mean spooner.”

“So long as I can be the big spoon.”

Holtzmann scoffed. “Never gonna happen.”

“Oh, please, you are total baby spoon.”

“Uh, a girl love nothing more than being wrapped in the arms of the Holtzmann.”

“I’ll fight you for it.” Erin challenged and Holtzmann smirked happily. 

“You’re on, love.”

“Goodnight, little spoon.”

“Bite me, littler spoon.” Holtzmann shot back before hanging up, promptly pulling up Erin’s number and testing her a proper good night.

Chapter Text

Holtzmann couldn’t help but feel a little smug when she took Erin to her treehouse for the first time and Erin looked around, amazed at the little shack in the tree. It was huge when she was a kid, it had shrunk as she got older, obviously, but I was still large enough for her to stand with a comfortable margin between her head and roof.

Even Erin could stand with a little space to spare.

“You built this?” Erin sounded surprise as she looked around the tree house.

“Yeah.” Holtzmann nodded, smiled as she watched Erin as she walked over to the far wall, looking at blueprints, drawn in crayon, Holtzmann had come up with when she was a kid. “My grandpa and I built it when I was seven.”

“So you have always been a little bit of a handy woman.” Erin quickly glanced over her shoulder, a little grin, turning back to the blueprints, running her fingertips over a line of the crayon. “And an engineering genius, too.” 

Holtzmann grinned cheekily, “Well, you would know how handy I am.”

Erin levelled Holtzmann with a glare as she moved closer to her in the small space of the tree house, sliding her hand down Holtzmann arm until she was holding her hand. “It’s so difficult to build a tree house, I’m impressed you were able to do it at such a young age.”

Holtzmann looked a little surprised, staring up at Erin with her mouth opened slightly. “I had my grandpa’s help.”

“It is still very impressive,” Erin pulled Holtzmann in closer. “I can just imagine little Holtzmann, a cute little tool belt, little hard hat. I bet you looked adorable.”

“I still look adorable now,” 

“You do,” Erin agreed. “What were the blueprints for?”

“All different things.” Holtzmann shrugged. “The electric lock, that one was for an RC car that had a little flamethrower attached. That one was a RC jeep that had a water gun attached.”

Erin snorted out a laugh at that, “How many things did you set on fire before you built the water gun jeep?”

“One. I instantly learn from my mistakes, Erin.” Holtzmann was serious for a split second, before a smile pulled its way onto her lips again.

“You know, most child geniuses peak at around thirteen, but not you. You aren’t just a kid genius, Holtz, you’re a genius. An actually, bonafide, Albert Einstein-esque genius.” Erin gushed. “You are going to contribute something wonderful to the world one day.”

Holtzmann had no idea what to say to that, she wasn’t used to someone talking about her like that, like she was someone special, someone capable of something extraordinary.

She had only ever had two people in her life who would speak to her like that, one was her mother and one was her coworker/best friend.

“And here was me thinking my sense of humour was contribution enough,” Holtzmann joked because thats what she did when she was uncomfortable, she made everything into a joke.

Erin frowned down at her, like she knew Holtzmann was only joking around as a way of changing the subject, but she didn’t comment on it, instead she dropped a kiss onto Holtzmann lips, smiling when Holtzmann chased after her when she started pulling back.

“I’ve always wanted to make out with a girl in my childhood treehouse.” Holtzmann grinned. “How about I open up the hatch on the roof and we can lie on the floor and stare at the stars?”

“It’s cloudy.”

“Okay. How about I open up the hatch and we lie down and stare at the clouds?” Holtzmann corrected, a cheeky little smile on her face. “Honestly, I just wanna lie down because that’s the best make out position, except for against a wall but it’s to small in here for that.”

“All you had to do was say that,”

They ended up lying back on the floor, Holtzmann’s arm tucked under her head while Erin used Holtzmann’s sweater as a pillow.

“This would be more romantic if it wasn’t cloudy,” Holtzmann commented, pushing herself up onto her elbow, moving to lie on her side, smiling down at Erin.

“I told you,” Erin cocked an eyebrow, watching Holtzmann as she settled against her side. “You have a really nice house.”

“Yeah, it was my grandmas, she gave it to my mom when she passed.” Holtzmann explained, nudging Erin’s hand up, measuring her own hand against Erin’s before allowing their fingers to link together.

“Is your grandpa still alive?” Erin questioned watching their hands as Holtzmann ran her thumb along the outside of her pointer finger and the inside of her thumb.

“Nah, he died when I was fifteen. It’s just my dad and I.” Holtzmann replied with an easy shrug, shaking her head when Erin apologised. “It’s fine. He was in a lot of pain, you know? I miss him but I didn’t like that he was in pain.”

“Yeah, it sucks to say they are in a better place because you would like to think the best place for them is here, with you, but sometimes you just have to try to understand that maybe that’s not true.”

“Mhm,” Holtzmann hummed, bringing Erin’s knuckles to her lips, smiling against the skin as she peered at Erin over their hands. 

“So, Thursday, are we walking or would you like me to drive?”

“Walk, it’s not far from your place.” Holtzmann spoke against Erin’s knuckles. “Besides, the walk home after the date is always the most romantic part.”

“You’re such a hopeless romantic.” Erin teased.

“Well, that and I can’t kiss you if you’re driving.”

Holtzmann grinned down at Erin, who smiled coyly, her head tilting a little to the left. “I’m not driving now.”

“You are not,” Erin untangled her hand from Holtzmann’s as Holtz brought her face closer to her own, her fingers tangling in Holtzmann’s hair at the base of her neck, pulling slightly when Holtzmann stopped with her lips inched from Erin’s.

Holtzmann smirked smugly at the almost needy little pull, tapping her nose against Erin’s. 

“You are a tease, you know that?”

“I’m aware,” Holtz breathed, watching Erin’s eyelids flutter as her breath washed across her mouth. “And I think you kinda like it.”

“I think you’re right.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Holtzmann hummed before finally connecting their lips, her teeth scraping teasingly along Erin’s bottom lips, causing Erin’s fingers to tighten in her hair.

They stayed in the treehouse for the remainder of the night, so lost in each other, alternating between making out and talking, that they didn’t realise it was almost ten until Erin’s phone rang.

It was her father, asking when and if she would be home, before Erin could answer Holtzmann piped up.

“Do you mind if she spends the night, Mr Gilbert? I have this movie that I wanted to show her.” Holtzmann asked, smiling at Erin when she gave her a disbelieving look.

“As long as she is home before school tomorrow that’s okay,” The man replied.

“Thank you, dad, I will be back early tomorrow.”

“Okay, honey. Behave yourself.”

“Dad,” Erin grumbled.

“Love you,” The man laughed cheerfully.

“Love you,” Erin muttered,

“Bye, Holtzmann.”

“G’bye, Mr Gilbert.”

Erin rolled her eyes and hung up the phone, levelling a glare on Holtz. “Not that I’m not happy to spend the night but you could’ve warned me.”

“Your dad is so cool.”

“My dad is a huge dork,” Erin disagreed, “But so are you, maybe that’s why you both get along so well.”

“They do say women date people who are like their father.”

“That’s gross,” Erin covered her mouth as she laughed, punching Holtzmann’s shoulder with her other hand.

“Hey, you are the one who compared me to your father.” Holtzmann shot back, settling on her stomach, her chin resting on Erin’s chest.

“When will I get to meet your father?” Erin asked, raking her fingers through Holtzmann’s mused hair.

Holtzmann licked her lips thoughtfully, trying to stop herself from shutting down at the mention of him.

“Hey, what?” Erin sounded concerned and Holtz realised she hadn’t managed to contain her reaction at the mention of her father. “If you don’t want your father to meet me…”

“No,” Holtzmann interrupted in a stern voice, sounding more serious than Erin had ever heard her. “No. It is definitely not you. It’s not that I don’t want him to meet you, I don’t want you to meet him.”

“Why not?”

“He’s just — he doesn’t think before he speaks so he say some really dumb shit.” It wasn’t a lie, not really. “I just don’t want you seeing my father and thinking that’s what you are setting yourself up for.”

“Holtz,” Erin sighed with a sad smile. “I’m not going to stop seeing you because of your father. I’m not here for your father, I’m here for you and the fact that your father is — whatever he is, a jerk or whatever, won’t change that.”

“You can meet him, eventually, but just — don’t expect much from him. He isn’t anything like your dad.” Holtzmann explained, leaning against Erin’s hand. “You will meet him briefly but not for long.” 

Erin looked like she wanted to ask questions, ones Holtzmann knew she wasn’t prepared to answer right now, so she kissed Erin instead, quick and chaste, before hopping to her feet.

“Come on, I was serious about wanting to show you a movie.” Holtzmann offered Erin her hand, easily pulling her to her feet.

“What movie?”

“It is called Hush. It is a pretty great movie.” 

Holzmann lead Erin into the house and up to her room, digging out her Rangers Jersey, the only shirt she owned that would probably fit Erin, and that was because it was like three sizes to long on Holtzmann, and a pair of sweats.

“The sweats might be a little short but the jersey should be okay.” Holtzmann said, motioning toward her door. “Bathroom is at the end of the hall, I will set up netflix and we can look at ordering take out once you’re back.”

Holtzmann got changed into her own pyjamas and settled at the foot of her bed, her legs forming a basket as she waited for her playstation to boot up.

She had just Brought up netflix when Erin entered her room, dressed in a too long Jersey and a too short pair of sweats, her hair mused and messy and, God, Holtz didn’t understand how she should make that look so good.

“What?” Erin stopped a few steps into the room, eyeing Holtzmann curiously.

“Mm?” Holtzmann hummed, forcing herself to look away, looking back at the TV, scrolling through until she found the netflix app. “Nothin’.”

“No, what?” Erin pushed, moving to stand in front of Holtzmann, who attempted to suppress a smile and peer around Erin at the TV. “You were staring.”

Holtzmann’s shoulders lifted in a lazy shrug.  “You’re beautiful.” She commented, her eyes not leaving the TV.

“Really? That’s why you were staring?”

“Mm. Well, that and you look very attractive in a hockey jersey. Why did you think I was staring?”

“I just thought, because this was the first time that you’d seen me not—“ Erin waved her hands around. “Done up…”

This brought Holtzmann’s eyes back to the girl in front of her, a frown marrying her brow. “What? You thought I would find you less attractive like this?”

“I mean, no…” Erin muttered, rolling her eyes at herself when Holtzmann gave her a disbelieving look. “Fine, yes.”

“You are beautiful,” Holtzmann uncrossed her legs, plating her feet on the carpet and reached out for Erin’s hand, pulling her closer when she had a hold of it. “And there is something unfathomably desirable about another women wearing your clothes.”

Holtzmann tilted her head back when Erin settled in between her thighs, her knees pressing against the mattress.

“I don’t think I’ve ever felt so comfortable so quickly with someone.” Erin admitted quietly, her fingers sliding through the space between Holtzmann’s fingers, watching Holtzmann carefully to gauge her reaction. A sense of relief washing over her when Holtzmann smiled, giving Erin’s hands a little squeeze.

“Me too.”

Erin smiled happily, “Have you got the film ready?”

“I got a little distracted,” Holtzmann replied, cocking her head to the side and grinning. “But my phone is on the bedside table, there is a list of takeout places, choose when you want.”

“What do you want?” Erin asked, moving to pick up Holtzmann’s phone, scrolling down the list of places.

“I’m not fussed, food is food.” Holtzmann shrugged, scrolling through netflix to find the Hush.

“Well, since we are getting burgers on Thursday how about a pizza?”

“Okay,” Holtzmann got up to turn off the light, making her back to the bed. “What’d you get on pizza?”

“Pepperoni,”

Holtzmann nodded, typing the number of the local pizza place. “We can get half and half? I like pineapple on mine.”

Erin looked disgusted, making Holtzmann glare at her. “Have you tried it?” Holtzmann challenged, trapping her phone between her ear and shoulder. Erin shook her head. “Don’t knock it.”

Holtzmann paced at the foot of the bed as she ordered food, placin her phone onto her bedside table when she was done, falling onto the bed beside Erin, wrapping her arms around her pillow and peering up at the girl. “You wanna start the movie now or after food?”

“After,” Erin slid down the bed to lie beside Holtzmann, facing her.

“This is very ‘teenage romcom of you’.” Holtzmann teased, grinning over at Erin.

“I’m scared of the dark,” Erin admitted quietly and, at first, Holtzmann was a little surprised at the revelation, but quickly recovered. “Which sound childish when you say it out loud.”

Erin laughed nervously and Holtzmann reached across to take ahold of her hand, giving it a little squeeze. “Is there a reason? Or is it just something that has always been there?”

“Promise you won’t think I’m crazy when I tell you?”

“Well, that depends,” Holtzmann grinned cheekily. “Besides, some of the greatest men and women were called crazy at one point.”

“I think I saw a ghost. No, I did, I did see a ghost.” Erin admitted and now Holtzmann was intrigued.

“What was it like?” Holtzmann questioned curiously, not an inkling of disbelief in her features.

“Terrifying. It was the mean old lady who lived next door.” Erin spoke quietly, her eyes unfocused as she thought back to the memory. “I was eight, she stood at the bottom of my bed for a year. I told my parents, they didn’t not believe me, they just thought that, because this was the only person I’ve every known who had died, that I was having dreams that she was standing at the bottom of my bed. It wasn’t a dream, I know it wasn’t. But I agreed to go to see a shrink because I felt like it would make my parent’s happy.”

“Was it just like looking at a person? Or was it transparent like in the movies?”

“I dunno, a mixture of both I suppose. It had a defined shape, I could tell easily that it was her, but I could see through her.” Erin frowned thoughtfully. “She was a strange shade of blue,”

“That’s awesome.” Holtzmann commented. “I mean, not that she scared you to the point that you are now afraid of the dark, but that there are actually ghosts out there.”

“Have you ever seen a ghost?”

“Nope, I wish I had, though.”

“And you believe me? That it wasn’t a dream.”

“Yeah, of course. If you say you know it wasn’t a dream then I believe it wasn’t a dream.”

“I think you might be a little too trusting,” Erin teased.

“Think you just have a trustworthy face.” Holtzmann shuffled forward, their hands trapped between them. “I believe you.”

Erin smiled thankfully. “What are you afraid of?”

My dad was what came to Holtzmann’s mind instantly but she just managed to stop herself from saying it, trying to pull off a nonchalant shrug. “Not making something out of my life, I suppose.”

“Nothing else? Snakes, spiders?”

“Not that I can think of right now.” Holtzmann hummed thoughtfully. “But I don’t like the sound and feeling of tearing paper.”

“So you can’t tear paper?”

“I mean, I can if I really need to but it makes my teeth hum.”

Erin frowned, an amused little smile pulling its way onto her lips. “What does that even mean?”

“Your teeth humming?” Erin nodded. “Like, when the dentist puts the cotton stuff in your mouth and you feel like your teeth have a pulse.” Holtzmann expected Erin to agree but she merely shook her head. “No?”

“No, that’s not a thing.” Erin said with a laugh.

“It is, its called maxillary humming.” Erin cocked a skeptically eyebrow at Holtzmann, who huffed. “Okay, that’s a lie, but it is a thing!”

“Well, how can I trust you now that you have lied to me.” Erin sighed dramatically.

“I guess I will just have to win back your trust,” Holtzmann groaned, like it was some large feat, before leaning forward and kissing Erin.

Erin kissed her back for a few seconds before pulling back, her forehead falling against Holtzmann’s. “This isn’t how you win back someone’s trust.”

“Well, I guess I can stop…”

“That’s not what I said.” Erin untangled her hand from Holtz’s, bringing it up to her neck, curling her fingers around to the back to keep Holtzmann in place.

“Man, women get needy.” Holtzmann grinned.

“Shut up,” Erin grumbled, pulling Holtzmann closer, and the mechanic happily allowed herself to be pulling in for a kiss.

Holtzmann pulled back after about half a minute, “I’m allergic to nuts. Literally not figuratively.” She admitted. “Though, figuratively, they aren’t my favourite thing either.”

“I didn’t even ask if you had any allergies when you came over for dinner, you couldn’t died.” Erin gasped and Holtzmann couldn’t help but smile. 

“It’s fine, I knew what your dad was cooking didn’t have any nuts in.”

“That’s still good to know. No more PB&J,” Erin hummed. “I’m not allergic to anything but I can’t eat scrambled egg.”

“Why not?”

“Like, I like the taste but the texture is just — no, I can’t.” Erin shook her head in disgust.

“Mm, it can get that.” Holtzmann nodded. “I hate romantic movies. To me they’re all the same. Boy meets girl, they almost date, fall out and then reunite. The only romantic movie I like is the titanic and that’s because it was my mom’s favourite.”

“What was your favourite movie growing up?”

“The Land Before Time. I watched that countless times as a kid, like literally every night before bed. What was yours?”

“Homeward Bound,”

“That was a good one,” Holtzmann agreed, a cheeky little smile appearing on her lips. “It this the mandatory ‘getting to know each other’?”

“It is. It’s dumb things like favourite colour or band or exoplanet.” 

“Kepler 452B.” Holtzmann answered without any thought at all, gaining a curious look from Erin. “What? I like astronomy.”

“Okay, I don’t actually have one, that was a joke, but it’s good to know I suppose.”

“It’s one of the main contenders for an Earth-like planet, it is very similar to our planet, orbits a sun similar to ours at round about the same distance.” Holtzmann explained. “But is is fourteen hundred lightyears away so it would take us at least fourteen generations to get there, and thats assuming those generations like to one hundred and we find a was of traveling the speed of light, or close to that speed.” Holtzmann stopped talking, smiling over at Erin. “But, hey, soon to be physic major, I don’t need to tell you any of this.”

“I’m not a fan of astrophysics,” Erin shook her head. “Plus, I enjoy listening to you talking about it.”

“You just like watching my lips move.” Holtzmann smirked.  “Don’t think I didn’t see you staring at my lips while I was talking.”

“You have pretty lips,” Erin shrugged nonchalantly, but Holtzmann could see the red tint on her cheeks in the dim light.

“And the pretty lips are waiting to be kissed,”

They stayed in bed, exchanging random facts with one and other until the food came, then they settled against the headboard, the pizza balanced on their laps and hitting play on the movie.

Toward the end of the movie Erin was coward against Holtzmann’s side and decided to wait until an hour into the movie to admit that she was afraid of horror movies ever since what had happened to her when she was eight.

Holtzmann felt dumb, of course Erin didn’t like horror movies. She began apologising, reaching for the controller to turn the movie off but Erin stopped her.

“There isn’t long left, and I kinda wanna know if she survives.”

“If you’re sure,” Holtzmann sounded unsure but placed the controller down on the bed when Erin nodded against her shoulder. “Okay, but tell me if you want it turned off.”

She didn’t, and by the end she actually quite enjoyed the movie.

“It wasn’t ghosts so it wasn’t so bad.” 

“I’m sorry, I really should have taken into consideration what had happened.” Holtzmann apologised, playing with Erin’s hair as Erin searched through netflix for something else to watch.

“No, it’s okay.”

“If you are, like, ever uncomfortable with anything, be it a movie I choose or anything else, tell me, okay?” Holtzmann twisted a strand of Erin’s hair around her fingers, smiling down at Erin when she looked up at her. “I don’t want you to ever feel like you can’t talk to me about something, you know?”

“I will, I’ll talk to you about it.” 

“Good, I’m glad.” Holtzmann smiled, dropping a kiss to Erin’s forehead, nodding toward the TV. “One more movie before bed, it is a school night after all.”

Erin smiled, looking almost bashful as she settled back down against Holtzmann’s side, continuing on scrolling through netflix.

One movie later Holtzmann turned the TV and playstation off, settling down beside Erin, facing her.

“I’m not being the little spoon,” Holtzmann argued and Erin smiled sleepily, too tired to argue.

“But only because I’m too tired to argue.” Erin muttered, turning so her back was to Holtzmann, lifting her head to allow Holtz to slide her arm under the pillow and under her neck.

Holtzmann shuffled forward, pressing herself against Erin's back, her arm slinging over her side. 

"Are you okay?" Holtzmann whispered against the back to Erin's head. 

"Yeah," Erin breathed, "You?"

"'Course," Holtzmann pressed a kiss to the back of Erin's head. "I have a pretty girl to cuddle up to."

Holtzmann lifted her head when she felt Erin turn her head to look at her, smiling when Erin's hand made her way to the back of her head and pulled her in for a kiss. 

"Goodnight, Holtz."

"G'night, Gilly."

Erin settled again, one hand tangled in Holtzmann's. 

"Holtz?" Erin whispered after a few minutes of silence. 

"Mm?"

"I assume you don't like being called Jillian?"

Holtzmann frowned at the sudden question. "No, my dad calls me Jillian."

"Okay," Erin replied. "That's something we will talk about another time."

--

The movie was fine, honestly the best part was the popcorn and getting to hold Erin's hand the entire time. 

The diner, however, had Holtzmann giddy. 

She hadn't been in over three years so when she entered she didn't really expect anyone to remember her but she definitely recognised Helen, the woman who would always serve her and her mother, as soon as the woman glanced over at her. 

She expect her to just go back to her work after that, but was pleasantly surprised when she done a double take, her lips splitting into a large smile. 

"Well, if it isn't little Holtzmann." She rounded the counter, making her was over to the couples booth. "How have you been, Sweetie? I haven't seen you around here in a while."

"Yeah, I've been okay, school and work have taken up a lot of my time."

Helen smiled and nodded, glancing over at Erin. "Who's you're friend?"

"This is Erin. Erin, this is Helen, she would always serve my mom and I."

Helen's eyes saddened at the mention of Holtzmann's mom, but she managed to offer Erin a smile anyway. 

"It is the anniversary soon, isn't it?" Helen asked softly, and Holtzmann felt Erin's fingers tighten around her own. 

Holtzmann nodded slowly. "Eight years," she confirmed, offering Helen a smile. "It's fine, I'm fine."

"Always putting on a brave face." Helen smiled sadly, taking out her pen and pan. "Usual?"

"If you remember." Holtzmann grinned cheekily. 

"If I remember," Helen scoffed, turning to address Erin. "Do you need a little longer to look, honey?"

"No, I will just have what Holtzmann is having." Erin flashed Helen a smile, who nodded, telling them she would bring their food right out. Erin turned to Holtzmann once she was gone, tentatively touching her thigh. “Are you okay?”

“I mean, it’s almost been a decade.”

“That doesn’t answer my question,”

“I think — I don’t know, I think it’s worse because it is a big year, you know? I’m eighteen, going to college, I’ve just been thinking that she won’t get to know about it all.”

“I didn’t know your mom but I know you.” Erin gave Holtzmann’s thigh a little squeeze. “And I know anyone would be lucky to have you as a daughter and they would be silly not to be proud of you.”

“Yeah, maybe.” Holtzmann hummed, “You do realise that my usual is squid tentacles that still move when you put salt on them.”

Erin’s nose scrunched up in disgust, “That’s disgusting, Holtz!”

Holtzmann laughed, “I’m kidding, Erin. I usually just get a cheese burger with blue cheese sauce and a banana milkshake.”

“That wasn’t funny,” Erin huffed, slapping Holtzmann’s leg lightly.

“Your face was pretty funny,” Holtzmann disagreed, a little smile on her lips as she leant closer to a pouting girl, pecking her on  the lips. “Smile,”

“I’m mad at you,” Erin grumbled, but Holtzmann could see her lips twitch. A dimpled smile pulled it’s way onto Holtzmann’s lips.

“No, you’re not.” Holtzmann argued planting another kiss on Erin’s lips.

Erin smiled but rolled her eyes, trying to make out that she was still mad.

“You can’t stay mad at this smile,” Holtz grinned obnoxiously.

“I’m sure,” Erin grumbled. “Did your mom know? That you were into women?”

“I mean, I told her that I found women prettier than boys, and that I liked them better, but I was nine years old, she probably didn’t take me seriously.”

“What did she say?”

“She said that that was fine, that I was young, I didn’t have to decide there and than, but regardless of how I feel when I’m older she would love me.” Holtzmann twisted her ear as she spoke, something Erin had come to realise was a nervous habit. “Which I suppose is comforting.”

“What about your dad? How does he feel about it?”

“He’s an asshole,” Holtzmann shrugged, “But he’s not homophobic.”

“I suppose that’s something,”

“What about you? What did your parents say?”

“My dad’s sister is gay so when I told him he was fine with it, it was something he had encountered before but my mom hadn’t, so it took her a little longer wrap her head around it.” Erin explained. “She never freaked out, or told me she hated me or anything, but it took her some time to understand what being bisexual was. I dunno, I think she kind of hoped that, maybe, it was a phase, that I wasn’t into women, because I’d never dated a woman until now. But, not because she was homophobic or anything, she just knew all the stuff my aunt went through and she would rather that was something I didn’t have to go through.”

“Here are you milkshakes,” Helen announced, setting two tall glasses on the table. “Your burgers shouldn’t to long.”

“Thank you,” Holtzmann smiled, pulling one glass closer to her, moving the other to Erin. “We should’ve gotten one, shared it, be all romantic.”

“Nothing romantic about sharing food, Holtz.”

Holtzmann snorted out a laugh at that, wrapping her lips around the straw.

The burgers came a few minutes later and, honestly, it were much better than she remembered.

They made their way over to the counter to pay after about an hour of being at the diner, Helen tried to decline the payment, but Holtzmann insisted, claiming that this was their first date so she kind of had to pay. This caused both Erin and Helen to laugh.

“You are just like your mother,” Helen commented, sounding almost amazed. “You know, she used to come in here most days after school.”

“You knew her as a teenager?” Holtzmann frowned, she thought Helen had met her mom when she was an adult and started coming into the diner after taking Holtz to the movies.

“I’ve known your mother since she as thirteen,” Helen replied. “She would come in here with her friends. For about a year when she was seventeen she would come in here with a girl, I’m not sure but I’m pretty sure they were dating. Back then it wasn’t as accepted, so she wouldn’t have been able to act like you and Erin do, but there was just something in how they acted that made me believe they were dating. Then they stopped hanging out, six months later she started coming in with your father.”

Holtzmann could tell, just by how Helen said ‘your father’ that she was amongst literally everyone else who hated him.

“What did she see in him?” Holtzmann questioned.

“Beats me, kiddo. I thought she was better off with the girl she was dating.” 

“Who was she?” Holtzmann slid onto one of the stools, her hand resting on Erin’s thigh when she slid up beside her. “The girl she dated?”

“A girl from her school. For the life of me, I can’t remember her name.” Helen said, taking in Holtzmann’s disappointed face. “She was a nice girl, though. And I hadn’t seen your mother as happy as she was with her. Maybe you should ask your father about it?”

“Not likely,” Holzmann snorted, “We should get going, I have a pretty lady to walk home.”

Helen smiled and nodded, patting Holtzmann’s arm. “Don’t be a stranger, okay? It was really nice seeing you.”

“You too, Helen.” Holtzmann smiled, sliding off the stool and taking ahold of Erin’s hand. “I will try and come by next weeks.”

“Hopefully Erin will be with you, too.” Helen playfully winked at her, making Erin laugh and Holtzmann roll her eyes playfully.

“If she wants to then she will be.”

“See you next week,” Erin smiled happily at Helen as she and Holtzmann made for the door. “That was nice.”

“Yeah,” Holtzmann hummed.

“You are okay?” Erin gently pulled Holtzmann closer as they walked, planting a kiss on her cheek, making Holtzmann grin, stumbling slightly as she walked.

“Yeah, it was just a little surreal, I haven’t seen her in ages.” Holtzmann hummed thoughtfully. “I think I might start going back regularly, maybe ask her a few things about my mother.”

“You should,”

Holtzmann walked Erin home, declining her invitation to come inside because she had plans with Kevin, who she felt like she hadn’t seen out side of work or school in a few days and she felt kind of bad about it.

Erin pouted playfully but conceded, taking ahold of Holtzmann’s hand and pulling her closer. “My aunt is coming into town, she wanted me to invite you for dinner tomorrow, she really wants to meet you.”

“You told your aunt about me?”

“Yeah,” Erin said, like it was the most obvious thing on the planet, a little frown appearing on her brow. “Why? Is that okay?”

“Yeah, ‘course, I’m just surprised. We haven’t really — I mean, we haven’t put a label or anything on it yet, which is fine, I’m actually glad we are taking it relatively slow, so I didn’t think you would be telling anyone outside your immediate family, you know?”

“My aunt and I are pretty close,” Erin said, “But, if you want to stop I will.”

“No, I don’t. It’s nice to know that you aren’t, like, ashamed of me or anything.”

“Of course I’m not,” Erin stopped, planting a kiss on Holtzmann’s lips. “Does that mean you’ll come to dinner?”

“What does your aunt think of me?”

“She thinks you sound nice,” Erin answered. “And you make me smile which is more than enough for her.”

“Okay, I’ll be there after work.” Holtzmann promised, one hand coming up tentatively touch Erin’s jaw, guiding her in for a kiss. 

“Text me once you get home,” Erin whispered against her lips and Holtzmann nodded, taking a step back.

“I have a lot of fun tonight,” Holtzmann catch Erin’s hand, giving it a little squeeze. 

“Me too. Next time I’m paying, though.”

“Deal,” Holtzmann winked at Erin, pulling her hand away and heading down her path.

—

Erin stopped by the garage at eight to pick her up, rolling her eyes when Holtzmann insisted she had to go home and shower.

“You smell fine, and you’re wearing clean clothes, that’s all that really matters.” 

“Yeah,” Holtzmann muttered, twisting the tip of her ear nervously.

“You weren’t nervous meeting my parents,” Erin commented with a little laugh.

“I’m not nervous,”

“You are twisting your ear, that’s your nervous habit.” 

Holtzmann’s hand stopped, dropping from her ear. “Meeting your parents was a surprise, I didn’t have time to freak out.”

“You don’t have to freak out at all, my aunt is nice, I promise.” Erin placed a calming hand on Holtzmann’s thigh. 

“And if she doesn’t like me?” Holtzmann challenged, taking ahold of Erin’s hand and began playing with her fingers.

“Impossible,” Erin said confidently, bringing Holtzmann’s knuckles up to her lips. “But, on the off chance that today is the day my aunt becomes a terrible judge of character, that won’t change a thing.”

Holtzmann nodded, pinching Erin’s cheek playfully, making Erin shove her hand away.

When they entered Erin’s house everyone was sitting in the living room, bar Erin’s father who was cooking in the kitchen, and Jasper who was probably in his room.

“Aunt Meg, this is Holtzmann.” The woman on the sofa glanced back at them, her ruby red lips splitting into a smile as she stood up, making her way to Holtzmann.

“I’ve heard a lot of great things about you, Holtzmann.” Meg shook Holtzmann’s hand. “Not just from Erin, though, it was mostly from Erin, but from everyone else, too. Jasper really is quite taken by you.”

“That’s good to know,” Holtzmann smiled nervously under the woman curious gaze.

“You just look familiar,” The woman frowned thoughtfully. 

“You might have gone to school with her parents,” Erin offered and there was a spark of recognition in Meg’s eyes.

“You look like…” She trailed off,  “Is your mom Jessica Matthews?”

“Yeah,” Holtzmann replied.

“No way,” The woman grinned. “I dated your mom when we were in our junior year of high school. How is she doing?”

Holtzmann felt Erin cringe beside her at the question. “She died, eight years next week, actually.”

“Crap, kid, I’m sorry.”

"No, no. It's fine, it's almost been a decade." Holtzmann waved her hand dismissively, taking comfort in the way Erin slid her hand up over her lower back.

“Was she still with… Well, I suppose she was, considering your name is Holtzmann.”

“I’ll be back in a second,” Erin pressed a kiss to Holtzmann’s cheek before leaving her alone with Meg.

“You look just like her,”

“Yeah, I’ve heard that a few times the past few days.” Holtzmann said, following Meg more into the living room, taking a seat beside her. 

“What did she end up doing with herself?” Meg asked just as Erin took a seat on the arm of the sofa beside Holtzmann.

“She was a doctor,” Holtzmann answered, glancing back at Erin briefly.

“General practitioner?”

“No, a paediatric cardiologist.” Holtzmann answered, tugging a smile onto her lips but Erin could see the pain in her features, how her eyes weren’t crinkled at the corners and her nose wasn’t scrunched up. The smile was, to Erin at least, blatantly fake. “She would look after and treat infants with heart conditions. She had only been a proper, qualified doctor for about two months before…”

Erin rubbed Holtz’s back, smiling softly at her when she glanced up. the seemed to shake Holtz out of her sad state and she forced another smile onto her face. “I even know she was into women until yesterday.”

“From what I know, I was the only woman she ever dated.” Meg explained, a little smile pulling onto her lips. “Your mom won most sarcastic in our high school year book.”

“I guess we know where you get it from,” Erin smirked at Holtz when she looked back at her, giving the blonde a little wink.

“When we were growing up she wanted to do something with languages. She could speak pretty fluent Spanish and Russian.” There was a little smile on Meg’s lips that had Holtzmann curious. “She talked about being a UN translator, she wanted to travel Europe.”

“What happened? Why didn’t she?”

“Honestly?” Meg licked her lips, considering her next words. “She was under a lot of pressure. From her parents, telling her that a translator wasn’t even a real job, which is ridiculous, a UN translator would be an incredible job. She was also under a lot of pressure from your father, he didn’t want her to go travelling. But she went to university to do a modern language degree.”

“Yeah, she went back to university after I was born to study medicine.” Holtzmann said. “So, it was my dad’s fault she didn’t do what she wanted?”

“I’m not sure,”

“Did you know my dad?”

“I did,” Meg said and from her tone of voice Holtzmann figured she didn’t like the man much, like literally everyone else Holtzmann had spoken to. “I mean, I knew of him, we never spoke.”

“Lucky you,”

“Is he still around? We she with him up until…” Meg looked a little uncomfortable (and maybe a little hurt?) as she asked the question.

“Yeah, they were together.” Holtzmann nodded. “I don’t know if they were happy, I don’t really remember.”

Meg nodded, “Tell me a little bit about you? What do you do?”

“I’m a mechanic, actually, at a garage a few blocks over.”

“And she is going to MIT, for engineering and physics.”

“Maybe,” Holtzmann corrected,  “I haven’t gotten my acceptance letter yet.”

“She’s going to get in,” Erin sounded more confident than Holzmann felt, which was nice.

“Dinners ready,” Erin's dad called from the kitchen.

Jasper’s eyes lit up when he came bounding down the steps, a pair of what looked like safety glasses strapped to his forehead, grease steering across his cheek. “Holtz! I have something cool to show you.”

“Is said cool thing what has your face filthy?” Holtzmann questioned, an amused little smile on her face.

“Dad said I could use grease to help the wheel turn, it was sticking all the time.” Jasper explained, using his hands as he spoke.

“Go get cleaned up for dinner, Jas.” Julia ordered and the young boy nodded quickly, taking off toward the bathroom.

“He was talking about showing you the RC helicopter he has been building.”

“I will have a look after dinner,”

Jasper came back down stairs a few minutes, hopping up onto the chair across from Holtzmann, his safety glasses still in place but his face and hands now clean.

“Holtzmann, can I show you my helicopter?”

“I was just saying to your sister that I wanted to see it after dinner, it sounds really cool.” Holtzmann smiled at the way Jasper grinned happily, his eyes dropping bashfully to look at his food.

“I think he likes you,” Erin whispered against Holtzmann’s ear, wiggling her eyebrows at Holtzmann as she pulled back.

“Shut up,” Holtzmann rolled her eyes.

—

Holtzmann allowed a giddy Jasper drag her up to his room after dinner, smiling when he proudly help up a half assembled helicopter.

“It’s looking really good, buddy.” Holtzmann praised, sitting crosslegged beside the boy, turning the machine around in her hands. “Do you have any old and disposable controllers?"

“I have a box full of stuff from old broken cars and stuff.” That had Holtzmann smiling, reminding her all to much of herself at nine years old.

“We could add a little nerf gun or something onto it.” Holtzmann suggested with a mischievous grin. “Imagine; your sister is in the kitchen or watching TV and you can fly in and shoot her while you are at a safe distance on the stairs.”

A grin that matched Holtzmann’s appeared on Jaspers lips, causing Erin to interject. 

“That sounds like a bad idea,”

“You only think it’s a bad idea cause you would be a target.” Holtzmann shot back, “And doing this will have me showing your brother how to wire a circuit board. Being under a attack and living in fear of when the next attack will come is a small price to pay for a kid obtaining knowledge.”

Erin narrowed her eyes at Holtzmann, who smiled cutely at her. “Fine. But mom and dad will probably take it from him.”

“You parents would never halter a kids learning curve,” Holtzmann argued, giving Erin a look that said ‘unlike some’, before turning her attention back to Jasper. “What’d you say?”

The boy nodded excitedly. 

“Awesome. Do you guys have a soldering kit?”

“I will go ask my dad,” Erin grumbled, reluctantly getting off her brothers bed and heading downstairs.

“What do you wanna do once you grow up?” Holtzmann questioned curiously, handing the helicopter back to Jasper.

“I wanna build planes,” 

“That’s cool,” Holtzmann smiled. “Just the engines or?”

“All of it, a whole plane.”

“That would definitely be a cool thing to do, buddy. You gotta work hard at school, though.”

“I will, I like school.” Jasper set the helicopter down on the floor and reached under his bed, pulling out a large boxed almost full to the brim with scraps of metal and left over piece of circuit board. Her grabbed one of the three pairs of safety glasses, holding them out to Holtzmann with a quiet ‘safety first’.

“Thank you,”

“I like the learning part of school, recess is boring. Kids think i’m weird so they don’t play with me.”

“I get that, buddy. When I was a kid no one wanted to hang out with me, either.” Holtzmann shrugged. “Kids are mean, you know? They make fun of things they don’t really understand, it sucks but it is not a reflection on the person you are it is a reflection of the person they are.”

“They don’t pick on my or bully me, they just don’t talk to me.”

“It will be different when you get into high school,”

“Was it different for you?”

“Yeah, I made a friend. His name is Kevin.”

Jasper nodded, “My aunt Meg and my sister both like girls, does that mean I will like boys?” Jasper questioned and Holtzmann froze up a little. She was definitely not someone kids should be talking to and asking for advice from. She didn’t know if she should wait for Erin to come up and ask her what to do or just answer the boys question as simply as she could.

“No necessarily. You might end up liking boys, maybe you’ll like girls, or, like your sister, you might like both. But that doesn’t matter, that doesn’t define who you are, you know?” Holtzmann spoke unsurely. She’d never had to do this before, give an impressionable young child advice. “What fundamentally matters is the kind of person you are. If you are a nice person or a horrible person.”

“I think I am a nice person,”

“You are, Jasper.” Holtzmann swore, lifting her eyes to the door, doing a double take when she notice Erin standing there, soldering kit in her hand and smile on her face. “How long have you been standing there?”

“Not long,” Erin shrugged setting the kit down in front of her brother, moving to take a seat on the bed behind Holtzmann, her hands clasping onto her shoulders and gently pulling her backwards, pressing a kiss to the hair just behind Holtzmann’s ear. “That was a good answer.”

“Yeah?” Holtzmann tilted her head back to look up at Erin who smiled and nodded, placing a soft kiss on Holtzmann’s lips.

“Yeah,”

Holtzmann spent the next four hours helping Jasper attach mini cannon onto the sides of the helicopter, rerouting the camera wiring to attach to a little arm that would move and pull the trigger of the nerf guns, shooting the little plastic balls. It was a pretty simple case of rewriting, something she had been doing for years, but it was different having to teach it to someone, so she was worried. But, thankfully, Jasper was a visual learner, like Holtzmann was, and learnt better from watching someone work instead to listening to instructions.

It was almost eleven before they finished working on the helicopter, just in time for Julia coming up and telling Jasper that it was bed time.

“It’s late,” Erin commented, leading Holtzmann into her bedroom.

“It is,” Holtzmann hummed, raising her eyebrow at Erin questioningly.

“You should spend the night,” Erin offered, “I will drive you home in the morning.”

“That’d be okay with parents?”

“They won’t mind,” Erin assured.

“Has your aunt left?”

“Not yet,” Erin shook her head, nodding toward the door. “But she is in the kitchen right now.”

“Can I..?” Holtzmann questioned unsurely.

“Of course, I will have pyjamas waiting for you when you come back up.”

Holtzmann nodded, pressing a lingering kiss to Erin’s lips.

Meg was sitting at the kitchen isle when she got down stairs, staring down at her phone.

“What was she like?” Holtzmann asked, causing Meg to startle, her head snapping up to Holtzmann. “I don’t remember much of anything, really. I mean, I was ten, I should remember, but I really don’t. I barely remember what she looks like. We don’t have any photos at my place. The one thing I remember is her singing in the car.”

Meg patted the table beside her, signalling for Holtzmann to take a seat, which she did. “I know what you are talking about with the singing in the car. She loved it, she would belt out the song at the top of her lungs, she didn’t care if neighbouring cars looked. She was caring, I’m not even a little surprised that she ended up working with children.” Meg spoke with a small smile on her face. “There was just something about her that was calming, you just had to be around her and you felt better. She was addicted to these milkshakes from a little diner not far from here, we would go there most day after school and get milkshakes and waffles.”

“Yeah, she took me there when I was a kid,”

“She loved that place, she took me there on our first date and she was so worried that everyone would look at us and just know. They didn’t, obviously, they had no idea, but she was quite skittish at the beginning, making a point of making sure no one else knew. But after a few weeks she relaxed, she actually started to let me touch her in public.” Meg explained with a fond smile. “She made me feel special, she made a point of telling me that I was beautiful almost daily, and she would always validate what I was feeling, regardless of how dumb it was. She was incredible, I have no doubt she turned into an incredible woman.

“Did you love her?”

“It was kinda hard not to love your mom, she had these air about her. She would just attract everyone, but she was a relatively closed off person, so she didn’t let a lot of people in.” Meg said. “But when she did let you in, she made you feel loved.”

“Did she love you?”

“Yeah, we were happy.” 

“Then why’d you break up?”

“It just wasn’t enough, I guess.” The woman shrugged. “It wasn’t a bad break up, we were still very important to each other. We just lost contact when I went to college out of town and she stayed here for college. She was my first love, you always have a place in your heart for your first love.”

Holtzmann nodded slowly, she was asking all of the questioned she should really be asked her father to a stranger.

“Your mom was incredible, Holtzmann. The relationship may have been short, in the grand scheme of things, but you mom taught me a lot of what it meant to be a good person. And it is not an exaggeration when I say I wouldn’t be the woman I am today if not for her.” There was a little smile on Holtzmann’s lips as she listened. “I know there's not much I can say to make her not being around any easier, to make you not really knowing her easier, but you remind me of her. And from what Erin has told me, you have the kind heart she had, which got her hurt on more than one occasion but she never once let that stop her from being the beautiful person she inherently was.”

“Then how did she end up with my father? He’s not nice, not even a little bit, I don’t understand what she seen in him.”

“That’s something no one understood. You mom was so far out of his league,” Meg shrugged. “But however horrible he is, don’t let him tear you down.”

“I don’t,” Holtzmannn assured with a sad smile. “Thank you for talking to me about this, I sometimes feel like I’m forgetting her because I don’t remember clearly what she looks like.”

“No problem, kiddo.” Meg moved her hand, like she was about to pat her shoulder but stopped. Maybe it was something to do with her mother, maybe her mom didn’t like being touched by people either. “And I’m glad it’s you Erin is dating, she couldn’t had found a better person.”

“Thank you,” Holtzmann stood up, wiping her sweaty palms on her jeans. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” Meg smiled, and Holtzmann left with a nod.

“Everything okay?” Erin asked when she entered, eyeing Holtzmann carefully.

“She told me some stuff about my mom. They loved each other, I don’t understand how she ended up with my dad.”

“What did she say about their break up?”

“That it wasn’t bad, that they loved each other but it just wasn’t enough.” Holtzmann shrugged, sliding her arms around Erin’s shoulder when she wrapped her around around Holtzmann’s neck.

“Did you get whatever answers you were looking for?” Erin whispered against Holtzmann’s ear.

“Mostly. I still don’t understand how she and my dad ended up together.”

“Is your father really that bad?” Erin pulled back a little to look Holtzmann in there eye.

“Can we talk about this another time? I’m tired.”

“Of course,” With a brief kiss to Holtzmann’s lips Erin pulled back, motioning toward the cloths on her bed. “They will probably be a little big but that’s cute so I don’t care.”

Holtzmann smiled at Erin’s cheek grin, picking up the clothes, planting a kiss on Erin’s cheek as she done so. “Back in a sec,”

Erin was in bed when she got back, her back against the wall and the covers thrown up to allow Holtzmann into the bed.

“I think Jasper is a little smitten by you,” Erin said, her hand landing on Holtzmann’s hip as she settled in.

“Well, how does his big sister feel?”

“She thinks you are alright,” Erin shrugged coyly.

“Wow, okay.” Holtz placed her hand over her heart in mock offence. “I’m going to sleep then.”

She flipped onto her other side, smiling when she felt Erin wrap herself around Holtzmann, her nose pressing against the back of her neck. “You know I really like you,”

Holtzmann smiled, sliding her hand into Erin’s that was pressed against her stomach. “I really like you, too.”

“Good,” Erin hummed, kissing the skin at the back of Holtzmann’s neck.