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Chapter Text

"Abby! Look out!" Erin screamed as a an axe flew towards her best friend's head. Abby ducked and aimed her proton pack at the bastard who just threw his axe at her, but Holtzmann had gotten to him first. "What the hell are lumberjacks doing in the middle of the city?" Erin asked with exasperation as Holtz picked up the newly inhabited containment unit.

"Well they had to make room for concrete buildings somehow." Patty grumbled as she put her gun away.

"Whaaaaat?" Holtzmann jokingly said, "I thought New York and all its concrete just burst out of Mother Earth."  

"Ha. Ha. Very funny." Patty retorted, obviously a little grouchy. Erin locked eyes with Holtz and Holtzmann gave her a little wink. Erin could feel her face redden, but just smiled to herself as they walked away. 

"Guys?" Abby called. The three women watched as Abby leaned over a fountain. "Look at this." She seemed to pick something out of it and the other three women quickly walked over to see what it was. It was a metallic circle, about the size of Abby's palm, with a green stone in the center of it that was intensely glowing. There were odd carvings all around it and it didn't seem like the kind of thing someone would just throw into a fountain.

"Abby put that back. It's got messed-up curse written all over it." Patty stated as she backed away with her hands up.

"But this thing could be why ghosts are popping up more now. We should take it back for tests." Holtzmann responded, a gleam in her eyes.

"No offense Holtzy, but that thing looks old. I'm not sure you should be the one testing it." Patty responded, a good three feet away now. "I can do some reading and see if I can find it, but y'all are gonna have to wrap it up in something first because I'm not touching it and getting some mummy, ghost curse shit put on me."

 "I'm mad as hell." Patty stated as she leaned back in her chair, books surrounding her little office space. Erin looked up from the book she was reading and Abby walked over to where Patty sat. "I can't find this damn thing anywhere! I swear it doesn't exist. I bet it's just some ornamental thing for a party." Abby looked down at the odd circular artifact now wrapped in a ziplock baggy at Patty's request. It had stopped glowing since they'd taken it, but they had no idea why. Abby watched it a moment and then looked upstairs to where she knew Holtzmann was dancing around. 

"It was glowing. It has some kind of significance. Maybe we're just looking in the wrong places." Erin suggested as she looked at Abby, hoping for some back-up, but Abby seemed to be lost in thought as she looked upstairs and then back down at the artifact.

"I think we're wasting our time." Patty responded. "We don't know if this thing is even a real artifact, let alone significant." It was clear that Patty was sick of this thing. Erin was about to respond to Patty when Abby interrupted her.

"I know someone." The two women looked over at her. "Someone who can tell us if it's real and maybe even what it is." Patty and Erin exchanged a glance. Abby sighed and finally made eye contact with the other two women. "But, for now, we can't tell Holtz. At least not until I know this girl's even willing to come." 

Erin felt weird not telling Holtz about this contact of Abby's, but she felt even weirder about the fact that Abby asked them not to tell her. Why couldn't Holtz know? She had asked Abby a couple of times about it, but never got any answers out of her. Abby wasn't usually secretive like this and it was really starting to get to Erin. They all sat around Abby's desk as they looked at the weird artifact. Whoever this girl was, she was coming in today to have a look at this thing. Holtzmann was still upstairs, dancing to 80's music, blissfully ignorant to whatever was coming through that door.

Erin was about to ask Abby a question when she could suddenly hear the creak of the door opening. All three women looked up to see another young woman enter, carrying a large duffel bag that seemed to hold some kind of equipment. She was wearing a black pencil skirt and a white blouse with uncomfortably high heels. She had wavy, dark brown hair and wore a deep red lipstick. She smiled when she saw Abby and held out her arms for a hug. Erin watched Abby walk over and hug her. Abby seemed uncomfortable, but she wasn't sure if it was because of the woman or because of the secrecy. Abby turned around and began to speak.

"Everyone, this is my friend Dr. Amelia Merkel. She worked at the Higgins Institute with Holtz and I for a while. Amelia, these are my friends and colleagues Patty and Erin." The brunette smiled and waved. "If anyone can tell us about this weird thing, it'll be her." 

"It's nice to meet you two." Amelia smiled. "I've been watching your work on television, it's really been amazing to see." The music wafting from upstairs was abruptly shut off. Erin looked at Abby and saw her cringing. Erin looked over to see Holtzmann standing at the top of the stairs, looking down at them in silence. Everyone felt uncomfortable as Holtzmann and this new woman, whose smile had slipped from her face, stared at each other. Eventually, Holtzmann interrupted the silence.

"Hello Amy." She stated with a dark tone. The woman allowed a smile to spread back onto her face.

"It's been a long time Jilly."  

Chapter Text

Holtzmann slowly descended the stairs, never letting her eyes leave Amelia like she was going to disappear any second now. Amelia continued to smile and just let Holtzmann come to her. Eventually Holtzmann was right in front of her, looking at her. The silence in the room was deafening, it seemed like everyone was holding their breath and it was almost too much for Erin to handle as she watched. Eventually, Holtzmann broke the silence.

"You left." She stated. It didn't seem to be an accusatory statement, simply a statement.  "How are you here? Why are you here?" Holtzmann asked as she looked Amelia up and down with suspicion, like this was all some big prank.

"I came back a little bit ago and-"

"How long ago is a "little bit"?" Jillian asked using her hands as air quotes and then folding her arms.

"About a year and a half ago." Amelia answered seriously, her smile gone. Holtzmann scoffed. "I'm here to help with this artifact you've got." Jillian pushed out her lips and nodded her head.

"Where'd you hear about that?" Holtzmann asked glowering at Abby who began to respond.

"Holtzmann we need help with it, you know she can find any-" Holtzmann cut her off.

"How did you find her?" Holtzmann asked. Erin had never seen her so serious or angry before. Amelia answered for Abby.

"It's my fault." Holtz snapped her head back to look at Amelia. "I made her promise not to tell you that I was checking in, but I didn't want to make things more difficult for you. I needed to make sure you were ok."

Erin thought she could see tears brimming in Holtzmann's eyes, but she couldn't be sure. Holtzmann just shook her head and turned around, combing her fingers through her hair as she did it. Erin looked at Patty and saw that the woman looked how she felt. Completely confused, but fascinated at the same time at least that's what Erin thought that tightness in her stomach was. Amelia looked at Abby who shrugged her shoulders and shook her head. Amelia walked towards the desk that Erin was sitting in and smiled at Erin. She looked down at the artifact in its ziplock bag. 

"Is there a reason it's in a ziplock bag?" She asked, directing the question towards Erin. At first Erin stuttered and glanced at Holtzmann, who still had her back to them and was intently staring at a wall. Amelia looked at where her gaze fell and then back at the artifact.

"P-Patty was worried that there was some kind of curse on it. She didn't want to touch it." Amelia smiled slightly.

"Smart thinking." She answered as she picked up the bag and proceeded to open it. "But I need more of a hands on approach." Holtz spoke suddenly and quickly.

"If you end up cursed because of that thing I'm not saving your butt." She never turned around, but Amelia just smiled.

"Guess I'll have to risk it, otherwise I'll never get you results." She picked up the artifact and looked at it closely, squinting her eyes."Is there somewhere I can set up my equipment?" She asks. "I won't need much room-" 

"There's space upstairs." Holtz interrupted. "I'll clear you a table." They all watched as Holtz quickly disappeared up the stairs and out of the site of the other four women. Abby let out a sigh of relief. 

"That went really well." Abby giggled. "That could've been baaaaad." Amelia just smiled and reached down to take off her heels. She walked over to pick up her duffel bag and headed upstairs into Holtzmann's lair. Erin could hear the faint sound of 80's music start up and let out a breath she didn't know she'd been holding. She then turned her eyes to Abby, who looked much more relaxed.

"Abby?" Erin starts as Abby looked over at her. "What the hell is going on?" 

Jillian worked quietly and seriously on Erin's proton shot-gun. It needed configuration and she needed somewhere to focus her energies. She could hear that Amy was upstairs now, but never looked away from her work. It wasn't until Amy had turned her back to her, as she began testing the device, that Jillian let herself look up. She wasn't that different from college, definitely older, with more make-up and a skirt, but mostly the same. Amy turned her head to look at her and Jillian ducked her head down again to continue with her proton gun. She could feel Amy's eyes linger a second before she turned back around. Jillian continued to work on Erin's gun furiously, trying to focus her attentions on it, but memories had flooded her head and she was finding it more and more difficult to think clearly. She finally gave up and dropped her tools to the ground. Pulling her goggles off and rubbing her eyes in frustration. 

"It's not like you to get frustrated at a machine." Jillian looked up to see that Amy's back was still turned away from her. "I can find a different spot if you need." Jillian scoffed.

"What makes you think you're the problem, Princess? Maybe I've got a new girl to pine over." She smirked to herself, knowing she pulled out a most-hated nickname.

"I know you do, I already met her." The smirk on Holtz's face fell as she stared into Amy's back. She had, annoyingly, still not turned around to look at Jillian. 

"I don't know what you're talking about." She answered angrily. Amy set down her equipment calmly and pulled off her gloves slowly. Jillian had always thought that was funny, Amy always reacted and worked so quietly and slowly, while she was the complete opposite. She used to love it, but right now she was dealing with a lot all at once and it was severely annoying to her. Amy turned around and leaned back on the work table, gripping it with her fingers.

"Don't lie to me Jilly." Amy smiled slightly. "We know each other too well for that." Jillian felt a warmth reach up into her cheeks and looked down at her shoes. "I missed you." Jillian snapped her head up to look at Amy who was the one looking at her shoes now, Amy looked up and exhibited a sad smile before she spoke again. "A lot." Jillian looked down at her feet again and turned back to her proton gun. Willing the heat in her face to subside. 

"I missed you too." 

"I honestly don't know that much." Abby stated as she walked over to the desk where her friends were sitting. "All I know is that they met in college and they dated for a super long time."

The knot in Erin's stomach seemed to grow tighter as Abby talked. "Amelia was the one who worked at the Higgins Institute first, she introduced me to Holtz. I guess Holtz was having trouble where she was working, they didn't like things blowing up a lot I assume, and she knew that Holtz was really interested in ghosts so she brought her to me. They seemed great together, you know? They were complete opposites, but for some reason it worked. Holtz would bring out the crazy in Amelia and Amelia was the one who could calm Holtz down."

A smile had grown on Abby's face as the memories seemed to flood back. Erin felt like she was going to be sick, her stomach was churning so much. Suddenly the smile fell off of Abby's face as she continued. "But one day, out of the blue, Amelia just left. She left me a note, telling me to take care of Holtz, quit her job, and went to Europe. I tried to ask Holtz about it, but she shut me out. She was really depressed for a long time."

Erin could just imagine Holtz sitting over her machines, not talking to anyone, and feeling completely alone in the world. The thought of it tore at Erin's heart and made her extremely angry at this girl who had just waltzed back into Holtzmann's life. "But Holtzmann got better! She started smiling, joking, flirting, and when she started dancing again, I knew she was going to be ok." Abby smiled as she began to look through some old documents. Erin tried to stop herself, but words began to fall out of her mouth.

"Why would you bring her back?" Abby looked up at her, surprised. "Holtzmann got better, why would you make it worse for her by bringing her back?" Abby squinted her eyes at Erin and put one hand on her hip.

"Everyone has to face their demons Erin. It wasn't an easy call to make, but we needed help with this artifact and Holtz needed to figure this out before she could have another serious relationship. I think I made a good call." Erin felt her face burning up, she couldn't control her mouth anymore.

"What if they get back together?" She sounded panicked. "What if she hurts her again?" Abby's face softened as she watched Erin.

"I wouldn't worry about it sweetie. Ex-girlfriends are ex-girlfriends for a reason. Just have faith in Holtz's judgement." 

Erin knew she was right, but couldn't help but feel worried and angry about the entire situation. She heard quick footsteps on the stairs and turned her head towards them, wanting to see how Holtzmann was doing. Instead, she saw Amelia running down the stairs, her hair now in a ponytail, with a big grin plastered on her face.

"This is so exciting, Abby, thank you so much for this opportunity!" Erin felt tears develop in her eyes and her heart began to race. They're back together already? "That thing is definitely real and super super ancient." Erin's heart calmed down, she was talking about the artifact. Not Holtzmann. 

"Great!" Abby exclaimed. "What is it?"

"I have absolutely NO idea!" Amelia exclaimed, still smiling brightly. "That's why it's so exciting." Amelia turned back to smile at Holtzmann, who Erin now realized was at the top of the stairs. Holtzmann was smiling down at Amelia and Erin could feel it start again. Her heart was thumping in her chest and her stomach was churning. What is going on? Holtzmann turned her head and made eye contact with Erin who looked down quickly and began walking towards her office, hoping to hide. On her way she dared another glance at Holtzmann who was still watching her, but now with a confused frown. 

Chapter Text

Erin sat on the downstairs, office couch as she contemplated what was happening. She felt awful. Her stomach was in knots and her chest felt tight. Each time she would think of Holtzmann and Amelia, it would just get even worse. She'd never felt this so strongly before, it was almost debilitating. She was glad that Abby, Patty, and Amelia had left to get some pizza and books for researching this artifact. It left her time to sulk alone. She held her head in her hands as she listened to the world around her. She could hear the traffic of New York, her own wildly beating heart, and the soft sounds of 80s music wafting from the upstairs of the firehouse as Holtzmann tinkered around. Holtzmann. Jillian Holtzmann was driving her slowly insane. How long had she been like this? Since they met? Erin couldn't tell. All she knew in that moment is that she needed to talk to Holtz. Erin lifted her head out of her hands, took a deep breath, and headed upstairs.

When Erin reached the top of the stairs, she noticed that Amelia's equipment sat on the front table in the room, Holtz's favorite table. Erin's eyes lingered there as a burning began to develop in her chest.

"Wassup Gilbert?" Erin's eyes flew away from the equipment to see Holtzmann standing there, a huge grin on her face, as she worked on some piece of machinery. It was like nothing was different. Erin lowered her eyes and smiled slightly as she answered.

"Just wondering how you were holding up, Holtzy." She looked up as she smiled. "It's been kind of a shocking day." Holtz didn't really react, she just nodded her head and continued to work on the equipment in front of her. Erin stood there awkwardly for a couple of minutes, unsure of what to say when Holtzmann broke the silence. 

"So what do you think of her?" Holtzmann asked, never looking away from her machine. The smile on Erin's face washed away as she felt heat building in her body again and couldn't help the animosity in her voice.

"Who?" She asked. Sparks flew up towards Holtzmann, who pulled her hand away from the machine and sucked on her hurt finger. She looked up at Erin quizzically. 

"Of Amy." She answered matter of factly. Erin looked to her side and down to the floor. 

"Why do you want my opinion of her?" Erin asked as she leaned back and forth on her feet, unable to stay still. Holtzmann was working on her machine again, it didn't seem to be going very well. 

"I just put a lot of value in your opinions I guess." Holtzmann said as she shrugged and continued to poke and prod at her work. Erin wanted to say something sensible and worthwhile, but the turmoil of the day was taking its toll on her. She was emotionally exhausted and couldn't stop the words coming out of her mouth.

"I think you're making a mistake by letting her back into your life so easily." Holtzmann looked up for a second, surprised, and then back down to her work as she answered. 

"I'm just asking what you think of her as a person nothing more, nothing less." Erin chuckled in exasperation as the frustration and jealousy of the day started to bubble out of her. 

"You know what I think of her? I think she puts on a nice show of being super nice and sweet and all of that, but deep down I think she's manipulative." Holtzmann looked up, her forehead creased as she listened. "She left you Holtzmann. She left you without another thought and Abby said you were so depressed after that. Now you're just going to let her back into your life with no consequences? This girl is not good if she's willing to leave you in an instant." Holtzmann had begun working on her contraption again. Her face looked strained, but Erin was unsure if it was because of what she was saying to her or because whatever Holtzmann was working on did not want to cooperate with her. Holtzmann spoke again, her voice quieter.

"Erin.. You don't know anything about that-" Erin cut her off. She wanted to stop, but the words just kept falling out of her mouth. 

"I know enough to be able to tell that you're making a mistake and that this girl is playing with you. It's ridiculous Holtzmann, I thought you were smarter than this." Holtzmann's face contorted in pain and Erin could feel her own eyes start to fill with water. "You don't owe her anything. You don't have to-"

"Erin!" Holtzmann was the one that cut her off this time. "You don't know anything about our relationship." Erin had never heard Holtzmann raise her voice like this, especially not at her. Holtzmann's face was strained and she looked ready to cry. Her eyes were wide and if Erin didn't know any better, she looked afraid. Holtzmann opened her mouth to speak again, but no words came out, only gargled gasps. Erin felt her eyes grow wide as she watched Holtzmann gasping for breath. 

"Hey goofballs! We're home!" Erin heard Abby yell but she was frozen in shock. She didn't know whether to yell for help or run over to Holtzmann. "Erin?" She heard footsteps on the stairs as she watched Holtz begin to violently shake and continue to gasp for breath. Erin heard somebody drop something heavy behind her and suddenly Amelia had run over to Holtz and was pulling her gently to the floor. 

"Shhh Jilly. It's ok. It's ok. Focus on your breathing, stay in the present." Amelia sat cross-legged and held Holtzmann's head to her chest as she rocked her back and forth. "Abby.." Amelia began, but Abby cut her off.

"I know. I'm on it." She stated. Erin still stood in the same spot in complete shock. Holtzmann's gasping seemed to have calmed down, but it looked like she was hyperventilating. She was still shaking and Erin could see tears falling down her face.

"Erin?" She felt Abby put her hand on her shoulder, snapping her out of her shock. "Come help me. She'll be ok." Erin slowly nodded and turned around to walk downstairs with Abby. She thought she could still hear Amelia whispering in Holtzmann's ear as she descended the stairs with Abby and Patty by her side. 

"She was having a panic attack." Abby said in a matter of fact way as she pulled some milk out of the fridge. Erin sat on a bar stool and stared at the counter. "She used to get them a lot more when I first met her. She'll be ok." Erin sat still as she processed what had happened. 

"What're you making?" Patty asked as she sat down next to Erin, placing one hand on her shoulder. Abby smiled as she pulled down a pan and turned on the stove.

"It's warmed up milk with honey and cinnamon in it. Her mom used to make it for her, it kind of centers her and calms her down when this happens." Abby stated. Erin felt her face grow warmer and warmer. Her eyes blurred with tears and she suddenly felt her throat catch as a sob jumped out of her. Patty pulled her to her chest as she began to cry. 

"Oh sweetie, she's going to be ok. No need to cry." Patty spoke softly as she patted Erin on the back.

"I thought she was going to die and I was too useless to do anything about it." Erin managed to choke out as the other two women gave each other a meaningful glance. "This was my fault." She wailed into Patty's shoulder.

"No it wasn't sweetie, this is really complicated." Abby said softly as she stirred a pot with milk in it. Erin sniffed as she thought back to what had just happened. 

"I was yelling at her. I made her upset." Erin croaked out as she wiped at her eyes. Abby looked over at her softly. 

"Sweetie.. I'm sure yelling didn't help, but this goes a lot deeper than that. When this happens, it tends to deal with a lot more than just what's happening in the moment. Sometimes it seems like there wasn't anything that immediately triggered it, even Jillian doesn't understand it half the time. What happened wasn't your fault." Erin wanted to believe her, but she felt a deep pit of dread in her stomach as she continued to wipe at her eyes. Willing the tears in them to stop coming. Abby poured some of the heated milk into a cup and added some honey and cinnamon to it. 

"C'mon let's go check on her." Abby stated. The three women walked somberly up the stairs in silence. When they saw that Amelia and Jillian were no longer on the lab floor, they went and checked in Holtzmann's room. Erin felt her eyes start to water again as she looked in. 

Amelia had managed to get Holtzmann into her bed and under the covers. The young, blonde engineer seemed to be exhausted. Her eyes were closed and she was breathing regularly and heavily now. Erin had never felt so awful in her entire life. Amelia turned around and smiled. 

"Thanks Abby, she's doing well now." Abby walked forward and placed the glass of warmed milk onto Holtzmann's night stand. Erin saw that Amelia was leaning down and whispering to Holtzmann now. 

"Jilly." Amelia whispered. The young engineer rolled around in her sheets and Erin could hear her lightly groan. Amelia continued to whisper.

"There's warmed up milk with honey and cinnamon in it by your bed." Erin watched as Jillian rolled onto her back and slightly opened her eyes to look at Amelia. Erin could hear Holtzmann begin to hoarsely whisper.

"Erin.." Erin's breath caught. Did she hear her correctly? Amelia turned around with a sad smile and caught Erin's gaze, before turning back to Holtzmann.

"She's right here." She stood up from Jillian's bed and beckoned for Erin to switch places with her. Erin slowly walked over to Holtzmann's bed and sat down on it. The blonde looked up at her and smiled.

"Hey." She whispered. Erin laughed suddenly as she wiped at the newly forming tears in her eyes.

"Hey yourself." Erin responded still slightly giggling. Holtzmann smiled and took Erin's hand as the two women looked at each other. Erin didn't notice the other three women had left the room. "How are you feeling?" She asked. Holtzmann shrugged.

"I've been better, I'm sorry if that scared you. It hasn't happened in a long time." Erin began to vigorously shake her head. 

"No, I'm the one who should be sorry. I shouldn't have been yelling at you like that and I-" Holtzmann squeezed Erin's hand and brought a single finger to her own lips. 

"It's ok. Everything that happened today just brought up some difficult memories. I just need to rest a bit and figure out my thoughts." Erin smiled and squeezed Holtzmann's hand back. Holtzmann reached up and wiped the tears away from Erin's eyes.

"I thought I lost you." Erin stated, which caused a new wave of tears to form in her eyes. Holtzmann wolfishly grinned.

"I'm a tough one Dr. Gilbert. It's not that easy to get rid of me." Erin laughed as Holtzmann gave her a two finger salute before slowly closing her eyes in exhaustion. 

The other three women had headed downstairs. Abby went to clean up the kitchen and poured herself a glass of wine, Patty had walked into the bathroom to take a shower, and Amelia went to pick up the old books she had dropped on the floor earlier. Each woman went about her own business in silence. The shock and pain of seeing Jillian like that gave the room a much different feel than earlier in the day. Amelia wiped away her own tears that she'd been holding back since Jillian had asked for Erin, when she saw something in one of her old books that looked promising. 

"Abby?" She called. Abby turned around and walked over to her.

"What's up?" She asked as she looked down at the book Amelia was reading. Amelia pointed to one of the drawings in the book. It depicted two men bowing before some kind of figure.  

"Look closely, in this man's hand." Abby leaned forward and saw that one of the men was carrying a circular artifact with a green stone in the center of it. 

"Is that what I think it is?" Abby asked in amazement as she pulled the book closer to herself. Amelia was smiling as she answered, her voice full of excitement.

"I think so! I'll have to look around some more, but that looks like our artifact." Abby smiled broadly. 

"Ok so who's the guy they're bowing in front of? It must have to do with him?" Abby asked. Amelia's smile faded as she looked down at the godly character. 

"I don't think that's a male." She answered as she pulled out a magnifying glass and poised it on top of the figure. 

"Ok so what girl are they bowing in front of then?" Abby asked in conclusion. It took Amelia a minute or two, but she finally put the magnifying glass down and sat back. Her forehead was furrowed in either frustration or concern, Abby wasn't sure which one.

"I'm pretty sure that's Hecate. She was a greek goddess of witchcraft and crossroads." Abby looked down at the dark figure and noticed a pair of keys in one of her hands and a torch in the other.

"I mean crossroads aren't that bad." Abby stated, she had been expecting much worse. Amelia shook her head. 

"No, you don't understand. When I say crossroads I mean between our different planes of existence. Between the dead and the living." Abby sucked in a breath. "She would supposedly protect the households and cities that worshipped her from demons and such, but.." Amelia's sentence trailed off as Abby's eyes widened. 

"But what?" She asked, not looking forward to the answer. Amelia looked up at her and grimaced.

"She could also refuse to protect people or even set the demons onto them herself." Abby groaned, of course it had to be difficult.

"So she can let any or every ghost into our plane of existence?" Abby asked in exasperation. Amelia didn't answer the question, but instead closed the book and walked back upstairs.

"I need to conduct some more tests."