Chapter Text
Once upon a time there were some awesome creatures. They made criminals who were tired sleep, and they were called Saviors because nobody likes to be tired and everyone likes to sleep. That's pretty cool, amirite?
But ACTUALLY they weren't putting people to sleep… they were killing!!! Since the people don’t like that, the “Saviors” were forced to hide somewhere safe. The “somewhere safe” in question was an abandoned town. There was a lot of scraps and materials, water in the form of leaky faucets and a pristine lake on top of the cliffs, and food from the small greenhouse and gardens to the south of the ruined town. The group of four kept all their supplies in the abandoned hospital; it was the most put-together building there, with only a few cracked windows and drafty rooms that they’d fixed with duct tape, walls, and wooden boards.
One day after sitting around on its shelf, bored out of its metaphorical mind, Goodware had decided to procure some phones from who even knows where, since it's got all that technological prowess. Why? Why not? Besides, it would be easier to communicate when the Saviors were separated, it calculated.
Therefore, it gathered the other three and dropped the box of phones it had stolen found onto the big table they’d moved into one of the cleared-out hospital rooms, often covered in metal parts and food leftovers.
“Mon dieu… what is this?” Artless wondered aloud, opening the box and peering inside.
“Phones._What_else?” Goodware replied. “For_long-distance_communication!_And_don’t_worry,_I’ve_got_a_powerful_firewall_on_each_and_every_one!” It made a sound reminiscent of a flustered scoff. “You_know,_for_safety_and_all.”
LiveBot reached into the box and pulled a phone out, studying it intently before syncing it up with itself instead so it could use its functions without needing it physically. [I suppose that is quite useful.]
Artless and EnemyFella both received a phone as well (the latter creature immediately tried to take a bite out of it). With that, the meetup was adjourned and the four skulked off to wherever they may want to go.
5:48 PM
Goodware added Artless, LiveBot, and EnemyFella to the chat.
Goodware: WHAOOOHO
Goodware: IM FLILED WITH SM
Goodware: HOY AND WHIMSY1!!!11!
LiveBot: Did you mean: wahoo i am filled with so much joy and whimsy!!!!!!! ?
LiveBot: How are you misspelling all this? Are you not typing in your head like I am?
LiveBot: No, wait. You don’t even have hands.
Goodware: uhuhhhehe the power of JOY AND WHIMSY MAKES ME MISSPELL!
Artless: itsbeenalongtimesinceiuseddevicesmondiewwhyaretherenospaceswhattodo
LiveBot: Did you mean: it’s been a long time since i used devices mon dieu why are there no spaces what to do ?
LiveBot: The little rectangle at the bottom, Artless.
Artless: ah! Thank you very much. How do i capitalize? Because the phone only does it sometimes.
Goodware: LITTLE ARROW!! IN THE COENER ITS CALLED SHIFT!
Goodware: ANd livebot before you try correcting me again . You are not fucking Google dude
Goodware: If you try again I will kick you ok no more
LiveBot: Sent a voice recording
Artless: How are you able to sigh? And then record it and put it here? Aren’t you typing in your head?
Goodware: technical prowess B)
LiveBot: THAT’S WHAT I'M SAYING. GOODWARE. I’M LOOKING AT YOU. YOU ARE TYPING IN YOUR HEAD.
EnemyFella: 87(/ &4#hikb gre h o 67 t ud7(/’jgb
Goodware: OMG
LiveBot: GOODWARE.
LiveBot: DON’T.
Artless: What is happening?
LiveBot: DON’T SAY IT.
Goodware: SIXXXX SEVENNNNNNNNNN
Goodware: AAHH2SFA5r63JTIS6$MJGIK6*SHUKB
Goodware: 67676767676767
EnemyFella: Hetgiobi hoiw t9o kiuhsdfg
EnemyFella: Hoaew
EnemyFella: Help
Artless: Are you in danger?!
Artless: I’ll be right there!
LiveBot: I think it just doesn't know how to use a phone.
LiveBot: Can it read?
Goodware: welllllp it said ‘ ‘ help ‘ ‘ so proabbly!
LiveBot: With the least amount of offense, that was disgusting.
LiveBot: People who use apostrophes for quotation marks are wicked.
LiveBot: Please, never do that again.
Goodware: Wicked…?????
Goodware: Say that again…………
LiveBot: Wicked?
Goodware: Sent 1 image
LiveBot: Oh.
LiveBot: How foul. I just looked it up and it’s over two hours long.
LiveBot: AND it’s a musical? Who’d want to watch a nearly three-hour-long movie?
Goodware: LOTS ov people,,, specially if interstellar n yhe MOTHERFUCKING AVATAR FRANCHISE have anything to say about it?!?!?!
LiveBot: That’s quite barbaric. A movie shouldn’t need to be that long.
EnemyFella: nhagh . rottn veg
EnemyFella: Hello! This is Artless!
Goodware: hi
EnemyFella: EnemyFella is somewhat able to read, I have taught him how to use the phone!
Goodware: NICEEEE LET ME SPEAK TO HIM
Goodware: HELLO ENEMYFWLLA HRU TWIN ???
Goodware: Wow ur taking a while
EnemyFella: hllo very goo d hungry
EnemyFella: Want frep
EnemyFella: sh meet
Goodware: sorry no meat for you ti hunt… we only have veggies
Goodware: Artless scared all the animals away with his stank
Artless: Hey!
Goodware: its true tho!!! 🫵😂 ever heard of a shower buddy???
LiveBot: A shower is a place in which a person bathes under a spray of typically warm or hot water. Indoors, there is a drain in the floor. Most showers are set up to have adjustable temperature, spray pressure, and showerhead nozzle angle. The simplest showers have a swivelling nozzle aimed downward, while more complex showers have a showerhead connected to a hose that has a mounting bracket; this allows the showerer to hold the showerhead by hand to spray the water onto different parts of their body. A showerhead can be installed in a small shower stall or bathtub, with a plastic shower curtain or door.
Goodware: buddy WHAT DID I TELL YOU
Goodware: YOU’RE NOT WIKIPEDIA EITHER
Goodware removed LiveBot from the chat.
Goodware: ahh… peace n quiet :)
Goodware: …
Goodware: actuallyy. Its tooooooo qUiet.
Goodware: ARTLESS ENEMYFELLER WRU
EnemyFella: H ere hi
EnemyFella: apojjdouhbduiygdbsjakajsajfsd
LiveBot added LiveBot to the chat.
Goodware: AYO WHAT THE
Goodware: HOWED YOU BREAK THE THINGY
Goodware: YOU CANT DO THAT BIIIHHHHHH
LiveBot: As a wise man once said… “skill issue.”
Goodware: BOY NOBODY IS WISE ANYMORE
Goodware: ALL THE WISE PEOPLE DIED NOW ITS JUST DUMBASSES!!11!11!!!1
Goodware: MASTER WU… pls come back my goat 😭
Artless: You’ve seen Lego Ninjago? 😲
Goodware: [Leggo With Eggos]
Goodware: No. i just said maste rwu because hes the only wise perosn i can think of
Goodware: have u?
Artless: Awh, you’re making me crave waffles now…
Artless: And yeah, I saw some of it a while back. Not much though.
Goodware: bon appetit
Artless: Huh?
Goodware: What youre french arent you
Goodware: Eat well buddy injoy ur meal
EnemyFella: meal
Goodware: Oh right i forgot i have to spell anything food related . DONT I
Goodware: Hungry mofo
Artless: But I don’t have anything to eat…?
Goodware: GOD I JUST FELT LIKE SAYING BON APPETIT OK THERE WAS NO MEANING
Goodware: GO WATHC YOU LEGO MOVIES OR WHATEVER BRO
LiveBot: This is not a valid reason to get angry.
LiveBot: And besides, you started it.
Goodware: mAN SHUT UP
Goodware: ORBICULR BLUE BALL
Goodware: THIS IS WHY YPUR DAD LEFT YOU
Goodware removed LiveBot from the chat.
Goodware: ,,,how do i block this guy before he joins back
Goodware: Maybe i shouldnt have done this
Goodware: I was bored tho…
EnemyFella: raon
EnemyFella: Rain
EnemyFella: Rainout am we t
EnemyFella: iWant fresh meeat
Artless: Come back to the base, I’ll dry you off and find you something to eat. :-)
EnemyFella: hlag,hr,, thank .Youp
LiveBot added LiveBot to the chat.
LiveBot: Rude.
LiveBot: I thought you were filled with joy and whimsy, Goodware.
Goodware: i
Goodware: You know what
Goodware: Yeah
Goodware: I AM filled with jy and whimsy
Goodware: Im the cool awesome firewall antivirus boy
Goodware removed LiveBot from the chat.
LiveBot added LiveBot to the chat.
Goodware removed LiveBot from the chat.
Goodware: coem on bro.,,,
LiveBot added LiveBot to the chat.
LiveBot: Are you done yet?
Goodware removed LiveBot from the chat.
LiveBot added LiveBot to the chat.
Artless: Hey, I think we got the memo…
Goodware removed LiveBot from the chat.
EnemyFella: iwill spleash yu wi6h raon watet\
LiveBot added LiveBot to the chat.
Goodware: DUUUDE
Goodware: Fine i gove up
LiveBot: Yay!
Goodware: npc ahh reaction tho
Goodware: Also you cant take this from me ok
Goodware changed LiveBot’s nickname.
fatherlessOrb: Oh, brother…
Goodware: this guy STINKS!
Goodware: And whattt its true comeon…
fatherlessOrb: I. Am. Not. Fatherless.
Goodware: comeon dude you literally got abandoned
Goodware: And people with perfect grammar spelling and capitalization have daddy issues
EnemyFella: yes tru artlses vryw lo mley/’
Artless: Hush, beast! I went out in the rain just to get you food and this is how I’m repaid?
Artless: I am not lonely!
Goodware: see
Goodware: Also peak enermyfella activities
fatherlessOrb: Why do I feel like something very irritating is about to happen?
Goodware made EnemyFella an admin.
fatherlessOrb: GOODWARE I SWEAR TO GOD.
Goodware: 🤭