Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Falling in love with a vampire... It wasn't as romantic as Mina had thought it would be.
It was scary, intimidating, simply horrifying. But it was also intriguing and thrilling. With every kiss, Mina yearned for more. With every touch, she shuddered. She knew no one would be able to make her feel that way except for her.

Which was actually very weird, if you knew Myoui Mina. She was a girl who often came over as shy and quiet. She defenitely didn't like scary things; she couldn't ride a rollercoaster because that just frightened her too much. Mina liked to stay inside and cuddle up underneath nice warm blankets, with her fuzzy pink socks and a good book, or a good movie. She neither liked to go out; in fact, she spent very little time with few friends who still stuck with her after high school. Basically, the only exciting thing in her life was her career as ballet dancer. She was on the national team and would make her solo debut soon. Besides that, she often was asked to be a back-up dancer for dancing groups. Myoui Mina was just an average girl living an average, quiet life. She was less than a wallflower.
Until she met Hirai Momo.

It was a clouded Wednesday night, a little past midnight, when Mina walked towards the 24 hour convenience store close to her apartment. Sana had unexpectedly come over and had demanded some snacks, like she always did. Mina, being the healthy person she is, could only offer her day-old fruit and peanuts, which the blonde had refused immediately.
"I crave some sweetness, Mina! I don't get how you can live on food like that," she had said to her best friend. So it was Mina's job to get them snacks and something else but water to drink whilst Sana stayed at her apartment to pick a movie. She loved her friend, but sometimes she wished she'd call for once so Mina didn't have to bother the people at the convenience store at half past twelve at night. She was already awkward buying stuff during daylight, let alone at midnight, when there'd be no one in the store but her. It already turned her nervous.

Mina could already see the lights of the conveniece store when she suddenly heard a faint moaning.
"D-do-don't come any closer! I'm warning you!"
The brunette looked up, when she heard the plea. It was faint, but still hearable if you listened careefully. Mina stopped walking to listen. A panick-y feeling gathered in her stomach. Goosebumps appeared on her arms, even though it was probably twenty-five degrees. But even though she was scared, her curiousity won it from her fastly beating heart. It was almost as if a force pulled her towards the sound.
"N-no please.."
The voice was softer now, almost inaudibly. But Mina paid more attention this time. It seemed to come from the right and was defenitely feminine, a male's voice could never reach such a high tone. Mina started walking towards the pleadings, the whimperings. Her pace speeded up until she was almost running. If it was a robber, she'd maybe scare it off by appearing. Didn't they tell you to do that when you knew someone was robbed? A robber often couldn't handle more than one person, so they'd flee, right? Then she could help the girl, because she literally sounded like she was dying.
Mina turned a corner and walked into a dark alley. She squinted her eyes, since they weren't used to the darkness just yet. It took her a few seconds, but then she saw the silouette of two bodies, closely pressed together against the wall. A curtain of blonde hair was coving both of the faces, so Mina couldn't exactly see what was happening. It almost looked as if they were kissing... But that couldn't be, because the voice Mina had heard, was still whimpering and pleading for the other person to stop.
Mina froze; she didn't know what to do. Her heart was beating like crazy, but she couldn't breath anymore. She knew she had made a mistake to come here, because this seemed to be a lot more dangerous than just a simple robber. She could barely see anything, because the streetlights didn't reach as far into the little alley, but she had this bad feeling that she had made a very bad mistake. Mina didn't know what to do. She wanted to run away, but she couldn't leave the poor girl, even though she didn't know what the blonde was doing to her.
Mina was still doubting whether to run or not when the blonde suddenly lifted her head. It had all happened in a split second. Her hair fell back, over her shoulders and back, causing her face to be finally visible. She had high cheekbones and full lips. A sharp jawline. Her large eyes held orbids as dark as the shadows, and as empty too. They were fixed upon her, and Mina shivered.
A dark substance was smeared across her cheeks and chin. It seemed to be black in the darkness, but Mina had a faint feeling it wasn't black at all.
Mina could feel her heart stop at the sight of the blonde. Her eyes grew wide in fear and she tried to take a few steps back. She wanted to run away. But she was frozen, she couldn't do anything but stare whilst the dark blood of the still whining girl dripped off her chin. The girl turned around to her... and grinned. Two bright white fangs became visible.
She whiped off the red liquid with her index finger, keeping her gaze upon Mina. Behind her, the girl slowly slumped towards the earth, with her hand in her neck. Mina let herself look at her for a moment, and saw that blood was dripping right through her fingers, smudging her clothing. She was faintly crying, pleading for Mina to help her, to scare the girl away.
But Mina couldn't move. She couldn't breath. She couldn't think. The only thing she could do was wish that the blonde would just return to the girl and not go after her. Whilst thinking that, she realized that that would never happen.

The blonde slowly made her way towards Mina. She stayed put. It was almost a biological drive; she knew the blonde would catch her anyway if she started to run now. The best thing she could do was hope she would leave her alone after playing with her.
The girl on the ground's crying was growing softer and softer... and at a certain moment, when the blonde had reached Mina, she couldn't even hear her anymore. The soft whimpering and crying had died out. Mina didn't want to think about what that meant. Tears filled her eyes.
The moonlight shone upon the blonde's face, making it twinkle a little bit. It was white, whiter than anything she had ever seen. And somehow, that was scarier than the black eyes. The girl's blood had dried up on her face. The blonde licked her lips, tracing the leftovers off her lips. Mina could see she was enjoying it. She had never seen such vulgar thing in her life before. The wide grin re-appeared on the blonde's face.
"What do we have here?" she purred.
The blonde's hand shot, faster than lightening, towards Mina's throat. She let out a yelp when the long, thin fingers folded around her throat, squeezing uncomfertably. Mina immediately tried to claw the hand away, but it didn't budge. The brunette started to breath more hastily, but that was mostly because she was so scared. She was pushed against the wall. For a moment, Mina saw her life flash before her eyes when the blonde came closer. Was she going to die?
She heard herself softly plead like the other girl had done. Mina didn't want to die yet, she wanted to live. This couldn't be happening to her.
The blonde was still grinning, her eyes still fixed on Mina. She couldn't tear her eyes away from the blonde's dark gaze, only stare deeply into them. If she wasn't about to die, she would've probably thought of them as beautiful. But all they gave off now was a somewhat creepy, crazy vibe.
Slowly, she felt the hand around her throat loosen their grip. The blonde's hand slided down, over her chest, and kept lowering until she found Mina's wrist. Her other hand joined, grabbing her other wrist. They brought her arms upwards, until they were pinned against the wall above her head. Mina couldn't hold back her tears anymore and started to cry. Painful sobs left her body whilst she let the blonde do whatever she wanted to. It wouldn't make any sense to stop her. She was so much stronger than Mina.
Suddenly, the blonde's face flashed foreward. She felt her breath in her neck, causing her to shiver uncontrollably. Mina closed her eyes, trying to calm herself down, hoping that if she concentrated on something else, the bite wouldn't hurt as much. But when she felt the lips of the blonde trickling down her neck, trying to find a good spot, panick started to build in her lower belly. Her body was shaking from the sobbing. But she couldn't do anything. It felt like all her energy was drained already. Her muscles wouldn't move anymore. And even if they would have, the blonde would've been stronger, no doubt.
A cry left her lips when she felt the sharp edges of two fangs against her skin. Tears tumbled down her cheeks. The blonde had bitten down; her jaws were slowly closing, so Mina's soft skin would be trapped between her teeth. It hurt, it hurt a lot and Mina prayed that anyone would find her. That it wouldn't be too late for her too. She didn't want to die.
At a sudden moment, the pain stopped. The blonde had stopped and had let her go. Mina was still pushed up against the wall, unable to do anything, but the biting het stopped. Mina wondered if she was sucking her blood out now, that that's why she didn't feel anything. Maybe she was already feeling numb because of blood loss...
Then it hit her that that couldn't be true. She opened her eyes and looked down, but there was no blood. With the other girl, her clothes had been smeared, but she couldn't see anything now. The blonde still had her face buried in her neck, still had her hands pinned above her head, but she didn't do anything. There was only the tickling feeling of her breath against in her neck. Mina's body calmed down a little bit, but she couldn't understand what was happening. Why wasn't she dead? She breathed unevenly, trying to figure what was happening.
When she felt the blonde touch her neck again, her heartbeat shot up again. She tensed her muscles, preparing for the sharp pain again... but that pain never came. Instead, she now felt the blonde's lips repeatedly in her neck. It almost seemed as if she was... kissing? Mina now really was confused. The kisses seemed sweet, almost tender. And when she felt the tip of the blonde's tongue behind her ear, Mina let out a small moan.
She was startled by the sound she made. Her breathing was hard, she was almost panting. Mina opened her eyes again, trying to figure out what was going on. The blonde didn't stop with kissing. Sometimes, she felt the tips of her fangs against her skin, but it was almost as if that was accidentally, because the blonde never acted upon it.
Mina felt herself become less panicky, but she was still nervous. She was shivering. Her muscles were still tensed, but the fear of dying had lessened. She was still afraid as hell, but feeling of the soft lips of the blonde in her fragile neck was awakening a whole different feeling in her body, one that she defenitely didn't want to feel right now. It was so weird.
"W-who are you?" Mina forced herself to ask, when the kissing didn't seem to stop. She cringed at her own voice; it was shaking and almost not hearably because of her sniffing.
She heard a low chuckle, in between the kisses.
"Do you really want to know?"
The voice was different than Mina had thought it would be. She reckoned it would've been low and dangerous, matching a snarl or growl like a real preditor. But it wasn't, it defenitely wasn't. In fact, it was very high, and about as soft as hers. It sounded like a voice of a normal teenage girl, soft and sweet. Defenitely not one to match a vicious monster. It startled Mina that she sounded so human.
"Yes," she breathed. The kissing continued and Mina gasped for air when she felt the soft lips on her most sensive spot again, where the vampire at first had bitten down hardly.
"You know what I am, so why would you want to know my name?"
The blonde's voice had lowered, causing it to sound almost... sexy? Mina didn't know what was happening to her. Her body was clearly craving for more, but her head was worrying that this was just the blonde's way of playing with her food before she... Mina didn't want to think about that.
She just wanted to know the blonde's name. Because she wanted to know the name of the person, or creature, whom was doing this to her. Who wanted to make Mina moan her name instead of yell it out in fear. But she didn't want to admit that. The blonde obviously knew what she was doing to her, and she didn't want to make it any more obvious.
"Just tell me," she muttered. She heard a low chuckle. The blonde moved her lips upwards, but did not forget to press a few light kisses in her neck whilst she did so. She felt the hot breath in her ear.
"It's Momo..."
The blonde, Momo, let the tip of her tongue run over Mina's auricle, causing a shiver to run down her spine. She expected Momo to get on with kissing her neck, but the blonde pulled her head back. Mina almost pouted of dissapointment, but she gather enough self control to keep a straight face. She was still scared, her legs were stable as cooked spaghetti, but she wasn't entirely sure if that was because she was scared of because of the neck kissing.
The blonde cocked her head a little bit to the left, like little puppies would do when they didn't understand something. It gave her something adorable, even though her fangs were clear and visible now. Mina stared into the dark pits that served as eyes, her lips slightly parted. Momo's face was so close that she could smell her breath. Surprisingly, it didn't smell to a rotten meat scent, like most animal predators. It smelled more like mint, although there was a strong scent of metal too. Blood, she reckoned. The blood of the girl she had just murdered.
She felt Momo's grip around her wrist loosen a bit, but she didn't let go just yet.
"What's yours?" Momo asked. Mina gulped audibly. She had to clear her throat twice before she could say her name well.
"Mina.." she murmeled. It stayed quiet for a moment, but then Momo started to grin widely again, like she had done before. It made goosebumps appear all over her body.
Momo's free hand curled around her neck. Her nails digged deep into the skin she had kissed only a few moments ago.
"W-what are you going to me?" Mina said softly. It more looked like a whine than a question, but Mina kept returning Momo's gaze. Normally she would've looked away when someone was staring so intensely at her, but this wasn't quite a normal situation now, was it? The blonde laughed for a moment. She brought her face closer to Mina's, so their noses almost touched. A knot started to form in Mina's belly. She wanted to free her hands.
"What do you want me to do?" she asked. Momo didn't give her time to answer; she let their lips crash upon each other. A feeling of lust overpowered Mina like she had never felt before. Eagerly she kissed back. The taste of blood invaded her mouth; but she couldn't care.

That was the moment Mina started to spiral down onto a dark road. From this point, she knew she should've just pushed Momo away and asked to let her go. She'd leave and would never encounter Momo again. But Mina was a naïve girl. And she wanted Momo. She wanted the person — despite her being a vampire — who made her heart beat faster and her insides twist together into a mushy puddle of nothing because she simply had never encountered anything like that. She had never known you could feel this way. To actually want to see the other person, to make them kiss you and push you up against a wall. To let them love you forever, because their love for you would never end. And neither would yours.
Mina called it love, back then. And perhaps it was. At least from her side. She fell in love with a monster. On TV, it was often romantized. The monster gets the shy, alone girl who falls for the misunderstood mythological creature. The creature begs the girl to stay away, because it's not safe. The girl stays. They both fall in love. The monster never hurts the girl. End of story. They lived happily ever after. Maybe the girl too gets transformed into a monster, so that it'd be both easier on both parts. Star crossed lovers who get to live until eternity. A couple that will last forever.
Sadly, the reality was nothing like that. Not at all.

After the first meeting, Mina went home. Without the snacks or drinks she was supposed to get for Sana. Her mind was dazed; clouded. All she felt were Momo's lips upon hers. All she could think of were the kisses in her neck. It was a wicked thing to think of. She was disgusted of herself.
When she returned home, she got scolded by her friend — of course. But she also pointed out the dark purple spot in her neck, a spot that wasn't there before when Mina left. A hickey... Momo left a hickey on her. Inside the blue spot, two smaller, dark purple spots were visible; the places of her fangs. Mina had immediately covered it up after that. But she knew Sana and she knew her friend wasn't stupid.
That night, she slept very unwell. The fear had passed by now, but the question why Momo hadn't killed her like the other girl repeated in her head. She eventually had to admit that she didn't know, and probably didn't want to know. But she was very curious. And she'd lie if she didn't want Momo to visit again. Even if it was just to hear her voice again.

A few days later, Mina's wish was granted. When she walked back home from the dance studio late at night, she suddenly felt a rough hand grab her wrist. She let out a cry of pain when she was pulled into a dark alley, into the shadows. The back of ther head hit the stone brick wall hard when she was pushed against it. She let out a cry of pain. When she opened her eyes, she saw a flash of blonde strand of hair before their lips met and she closed her eyes again.
Mina was that night a lot more willingly than she had been the first night. The fright hadn't completely been gone; Momo liked to bite her lip or nibble at the skin in her neck and it still made her nervous. But she let herself enjoy it more now. She could even view Momo as a normal human, since the bad blood taste had worn off her mouth. Unlike the first time, she now only tasted like fresh mint. The sweet scent of Momo's parfume made Mina dizzy, and she wouldn't have liked it otherwise. She kept telling herself that if Momo wanted to hurt her, she would have already, right?
That night she went home with a second and even a third hickey. This time on the other side of her neck and one on her collar bone. Mina damned herself for liking it so much. She knew she shouldn't, but emotions never played by the rules. And Mina was full of rebellious emotions.

Chapter Text

The weeks after that continued like that.
Whenever she was late outside, and there was no one around, Momo would appear. Mina didn't mind it at all. In fact, she got more and more into it, at a point where she turned the roles and Momo ended up against the wall. The first time she did that, she had been rather scared; not knowing if Momo would appreciate that. But all she heard was a low laugh. From that moment, Mina found herself trusting Momo almost completely. If she let her take control like that, she doubted anything she would do would cause Momo to get angry.
The hickeys ran lower and lower over Mina's body every time they met, until a time where her blouse was opened half way up and Momo was about to unclip her bra.
"St-stop," Mina had breathed then, causing Momo to look up a bit confusedly. The blonde had gotten just as eager, maybe even more eager, as her and didn't want to stop. Neither did Mina. That was the first time Mina took Momo to her house.

Sex with Momo was the best thing she had ever done. Whilst Mina was a rather shy and quiet girl around her friends and especially around people she was less comfertable with, she often couldn't act upon that small part of her that actually wanted to be a mature woman who knew exactly what she wanted. The kind of woman that made men and women swoon in front of her feet. With Momo, she could finally be that woman. Because the blonde desired her. She wanted her as badly and Mina wanted her. And Mina could finally explore that mature part of her and see how far her limits would go. She reckoned Momo would be up for anything.
Momo wasn't a gentle lover, but she had neither expected so, nor did she want Momo to treat her sweetly. She has had a few lovers whom had all been too sweet. She wanted a lover that made her feel the stars, that made her crazy with lust and make the heat between her legs grow with just a single look. Momo was perfect.
Mina had at first been very insecure about her performances. It had been clear since the very first minute that Momo was more experienced than she was. And otherwise braver. Mina thought she knew a few things about sex, but she discovered she didn't even know half and had experienced even less. Momo seemed to be confident in everything she did, which caused Mina to doubt herself a little bit. She wasn't experienced or daring enough, it seemed, to please Momo. Whilst Momo drove her crazy by only kissing her, she had a hard time to be on the same level as the blonde. She tried hard, but she felt like it wasn't enough. Mina was a bit awkard with things like these after all, even though her mind went places she couldn't follow.
But Momo was weirdly patient with her. Their first time had actually been a bit of... sweet? It wasn't exactly tender, but even back then Mina understood that Momo could do so much more than just that. They had their first time in bed, like any other couple. Momo had immediately shifted on top, kissing her. Mina kissed back eagerly, but her hands barely travelled any lower than Momo's waist, whilst she felt the blonde's hands all over her body. Sometimes just stroking or tickling, but often teasing. Momo shifted to her neck, leaving a hickey or two and some featherlight kisses to sooth it a bit. She lowered to her collar bones, and from that moment, Mina's breath became hastier; she breathed in and out at an odd pace. Momo had never gone lower than her collar bones and it made her extremely nervous. Suddenly she was an insecure sixteen-year-old again who had doubts about her body. Would Momo like her? Didn't she have too many curves? Too fat? Too thin? Too toned? Too pale? She became extremely nervous, which made breathing even harder. Momo's mouth left a trail off kisses on their way to her breasts. Her shirt had been long gone and she was only left in her bra. But when she felt Momo's hands slide towards her back to unclip her bra, she had to bite her lip not to stop her. But the blonde seemed to know what to do, it wast almost as if she could
"Ssssh, it's going to be alright," Momo had whispered in her ear. "I know it's scary. You can always tell me to stop."
But at that, Mina had shaken her head. She wanted Momo, she knew that. She was just scared she wouldn't live up to Momo's expectations. But the blonde had not once let her think that she wasn't enough. Since that Mina was the first one to receive an orgasm, she could 1) copy Momo a little bit, to ensure her pleasure and 2) get comfertable with the situation. Eventually, when it was her turn, it wasn't even that bad. She had thought that she was the most sensitive one of the two, but she discovered that Momo reacted as heavily on her touches as she had to hers, which made everything a lot easier. Mina felt a little better after noticing that. It gave her confidence a boost. If a dangerous vampire could be so weak for her, then she would be able to do anything.
Their second time had been a lot more intense. Now that the two girls knew what the other liked, what they could do and what they couldn't, it became a lot easier to speed it up a little bit. The bed was replaced by the couch and this time Mina was the one on top. She dared to explore a little more; tease a little more, bite a little more. Momo seemed to dig it as much as Mina did.
After that, the couch was replaced by a chair. The chair by her wooden kitchen table. And eventually, the wall was enough. With every time, Mina grew needier for Momo. She couldn't hide her attraction towards the vampire anymore, and honestly didn't want to anymore. The blonde knew how she made Mina feel, and Mina didn't mind it one bit. She knew the blonde was attracted to her too, and she couldn't get enough of her.

Mina didn't know the exact moment when she realized that sex just wasn't enough anymore. Sure, it was great, don't get her wrong. Momo was the lover everyone wishes for. The blonde always seemed to know exactly what Mina wanted and needed. Harder, faster, softer, slower; she never had to call out for it. She only called out Momo's name.
But Mina started to crave other stuff. The blonde was great in love making, but that was most of the time everything they did. Somehow, Mina was always the last one to receive an orgasm. After that, Momo would carry her to her bed and tuck her in. Often she stayed a little while longer to lay with her, but eventually she'd always leave before dawn. Sometimes almost immediately, sometimes after an hour, often after a few hours, when Mina had long fallen asleep. Mina only got to spend very little time with her, and often she was too tired to talk, even though she'd want too. Mina wanted to talk about everything. Sh had never felt such an urge to talk to someone. She wanted to know everything about Momo. Her favourite colour, what her life was like, what her hobbies were. She wanted to talk about the universe and everything that existed in it with Momo. But they never got the chance to.
She just played with the blonde's hair, or press an occasional kiss on her cheek. When they felt like it, they kissed too. Not their eager way of kissing, where their tongues met more than their lips, but the sweet kind of kiss that made your head spin and your heartbeat race of excitement. The kind of kiss that left you dizzy with each other's scent. Mina loved those kisses more than their normal kisses. But they always lasted too shortly.
Mina cherished the moments when all they did was lie in Mina's large bed and cuddle up. Momo's arms around her waist, her fingers slowly stroking her skin, was more than relaxing. They'd just lay there and relax after the tiring sex. Mina would eventually fall asleep, but her dreams would not be any different than reality. And at a certain moment, she wished that it could be like that forever. She didn't want Momo to leave anymore.

Her friends noticed something was off with her. Sana, her best friend, was the first one to point out how happy Mina seemed the past few weeks. They had never spoken about Mina's secret lover, but the bite and scratch marks which were often found on her friend's body, told Sana enough. She didn't comment on it, maybe because she was a bit jealous too. It was clear her friend had way better sex than her and her boyfriend, and she seemed to be deeply in love too. Whenever Sana brought up anything remotively romantic, Mina's cheeks immediately flared red and she often looked back to the ground to hide her broad smile. Sana often asked if she couldn't be introduced to her lover, but Mina shook her head every time, telling some lame-ass lie about how her partner liked to be on their own and that it was just a fling, a few one-night stands. Sana knew she was being lied to, but she decided to leave it anyway. It was clear to her that it weren't just a few one night stands. Mina showed all the signs of being in love, so Sana didn't really get why she wouldn't introduce her lover to her. If Mina didn't want to introduce her boyfriend to her, so be it, but she became more curious and curious with every passing day.

"Don't you ever want to like... settle down?" Mina asked one day, when the two finally laid down in bed. The clock ticked half past two and their breaths were still fast due to their latest orgasms. Momo looked up to her and frowned her eyebrows.
"What do you mean?"
"Now... well, like, get a girlfriend, and such. Instead of just.. all of this. Doing couple things. Like, wearing each other's shirts, making each other breakfast, going out for dinner, seeing a movie together, cuddling up on the couch... stuff like that."
Mina could barely get the words out of her mouth. Luckily it was dark in her bedroom, and she hoped the vampire wouldn't see her red cheeks. She had wanted to ask Momo already a very long time if she didn't rather want a real relationship than just the sex. Mina surely would like to.
Momo shrugged.
"No, not really. It's not possible," she simply said, in a monotonous, almost bored voice. Mina blinked a few times with her eyes, utterly surprised at her answer. She hadn't expected Momo to be so negative towards a relationship. Was all she craved sex? Nothing more? Not a girlfriend that looked after you? And took care of you when you were sick? One that kissed your flaws away and made you feel beautiful every day again even when you are at your worst? Mina couldn't understand why not. She hadn't always been appalled to having a relationship, in fact she mostly was repulsed by it, but now that she had met Momo... it was all different. And she really craved for it, like a heroine-addict craved for drugs.
"What do you mean with 'it's not possible'," she asked.
"Don't know if you still remember, Miguri, but I suck blood for a living. Wouldn't be exactly safe if I go meet your parents and such, right?" Momo replied with a chuckle. Mina didn't understand why this was funny. She suddenly didn't like her nickname very much anymore.
"But you never hurted me," she objected.
"Doesn't mean I never thought of it. Or wanted it."
The blonde looked up to her with the same dark gaze she had given her at their first meeting. Even now it made her shiver.
"But you didn't," Mina nevertheless said. "Because you care about me."
"So? That doesn't mean I immediately care about your family and friends. I hold myself back for the sake of us, of what we have build up, but I don't give a single damn about anyone else."
Mina swallowed audibly.
"So, that's a no?" she asked softly.
Momo raised her eyes questioningly.
"You don't want to be my girlfriend?" Mina explaiend. Momo grinned, chuckled, and shook her head.
"Oh baby, no."
Momo pressed a kiss on her lips and got out of bed to find her clothes. Mina had never felt so empty before.

Chapter Text

Weeks passed, and nothing changed. Mina's feelings didn't. Momo's actions didn't. They were stuck in the same spot. Momo didn't want to get in a relationship, Mina didn't want to stop their occasional — nowadays almost daily — meet ups. It felt like Momo had become part of her now. Whenever the blonde was with her, Mina lived up entirely. She would let all her feelings out that she had stuffed away during the day. Her frustrations, her desires. Momo often praised how feisty she could be, despite 'being just a human'. It made her even feistier — how Momo liked to call it. It somehow felt like she had to impress Momo, to show her she could not only be sweet but live up to her expectations. She wanted Momo to feel the same desire that drove her, but it didn't seem to work. Mina didn't get the result she wanted, because Momo still left every evening, despite all her neck-biting, bruises and hickeys. Momo would never stay, and Mina would grow more desperate every day.

It was a cold December-evening when she heard a few firm knocks on the door. Christmas was coming, little snowflakes were falling from the sky, as they usually did around this time of the year. Mina was snuggled up in her cozy sweater and fuzzy socks. The TV was on. Home Alone was playing, but she didn't pay much attention to it. Mina was wrapped up in a conversation with Sana. They had been chatting for the past few hours after Sana told her she broke up with her boyfriend. Mina felt like she had to be the supportive friend and help her through her break up. She suggested her friend should come over tonight and watch a movie together or something, maybe eat some ice cream to help and soothe her broken heart. Mina couldn't stand it to see Sana unhappy, and wanted to cheer her up badly.
Mina looked up from the sound. Three knocks? That meant Momo was outside!
She rushed to the door, leaving her phone on the couch and opened the door. The blonde was leaning against the door frame. She wore a blood red blouse, tucked in black waist-high shorts. Her hair was pushed back and her lips were slightly parted. They were always slightly parted, as if she was always ready to kiss her. Their eyes met immediately, and she could feel her blood rush.
Momo held up a bottle of champagne.
"Happy anniversary, Miguri," Momo chuckled. "You do have appropriate glasses, right?"
"W-what?" Mina muttered. Momo raised her perfect eyebrows.
"It's been exactly half a year ago since we met. Reason for celebrating, isn't it?" Momo chuckled. Mina looked down, in hope to hide her pink cheeks. She huffed.
"Remembering the date of meeting... Sounds a lot like couples would do," she mumbled.
"Only that we are not a couple," Momo laughed, as she stepped in. Her heels clicked rhythmatically on Mina's wooden floor as she walked over to her kitchen. The blonde knew her way around Mina's appartment by now and started to look in the cupboards to find champagne glasses.
"Why did you even bring that? I don't drink if it's not a special occasion and you can't handle human food and drinks. It's completely useless," Mina objected. She heard Momo laugh, whilst she pulled out two glasses.
"It's a special occasion, Mina. And I can set myself to drink one glass tonight. Plus, fucking with alcohol in your body is way better, even for a vamp."
The blonde turned around and licked her lips. Mina thought she might get a heart attack. Her face must've showed, because Momo started to chuckle again. She took a corkscrew out of one of the drawers and opened the bottle with a loud pang. She poured the clear yellow, bubbling liquid into the two glasses. Momo took both of them, and walked over to the other girl, handing her the glass. She raised her own, and Mina mimicked the blonde.
"To us," she said. Mina smiled wryly and mimicked Momo. Their glasses clicked together. Mina drank her drink in one gulp. She usually didn't need alcohol to cope with problems but damn, she really needed it right now. Maybe the blonde was right. Hopefully it would take the pain afterwards away a bit. Maybe she'd fall asleep immediately, instead of wondering for hours what it would be like if Momo stayed the night.
Momo drank from hers in tiny sips. Occasionally, she made a face of disgust. Mina chuckled.
"You really don't like it, do you?" she asked. Momo put it down and pulled a face.
"No, this stuff is disgusting, I don't get how you humans drink it," she whined. Mina laughed and put her glass down. She took a few steps in Momo's direction, got hers too and put it down as well. Then she placed her hands upon Momo's hips and pulled her closer.
"We say the same thing about your diet," she said. "You don't have to drink it for me, just leave the alcohol."
Momo chuckled and rolled her eyes. Her arms curled around Mina's neck.
"Hmm. So, if we skip the alcohol, then where are we?" the blonde asked. Her eyes grew a bit darker and Mina chuckled softly. The was being played again, she knew, but she couldn't say she disliked that. She bowed foreward and pecked the blonde's lips, moving over directly to her neck.
"You're always so needy," the brunette whispered. Mina let her teeth scrape over Momo's earlobe. The blonde gasped for air. She felt her hand in her neck, keeping her there. Momo chuckled.
"Well, it's not my fault," she said. Her voice was already growing huskier, her breathing was already faster. Mina nowadays only had to press a kiss in her neck and Momo would already get turned on. She knew how it felt though; she had the same problem when Momo kissed her neck. It was strangely addicting.
"I know, it's mine. But I'm not apologizing for it," she chuckled.
Momo laughed, but that laugh quickly turned into a moan when she felt Mina bit down in the soft skin of her neck. The blonde bit her lip, letting her hands curl in Mina's short hair. She loved the way her fingers ran through her hair, often softly pulling it. Mina lowered to her collarbone, pressing feather light kisses upon the light — almost entirely white — skin. But before she could start to unbutton Momo's blouse, the tables turned.
Momo was grinning when she quickly shifted her hands from her neck to her waist and spinned them around, causing Mina to end up against the wall. The hit blew the air out of her lungs, but she knew better than to be surprised by the blonde. Immediately, Momo's face was buring in her neck. Her cold hands already crept underneath her sweater, causing shivers to run down her spine. At first they only stayed on her hips, whilst her mouth was licking and biting and kissing. Mina's eyes fluttered shut at the moment she moaned Momo's name shamelessly. She had learned a long time ago that it was only more turning on for both of them and since then she didn't hold back anymore.
Momo's hands crept up already. Mina bit her lip when she felt her fingers tug at at the opening of her bra. She opened it quickly, due to her trained fingers. She felt the fabric around her breasts loosen, but not fall yet. The blonde lifted her head and started to kiss her passionately. Mina, completely back by the feeling of their lips upon each other due to the fact that she had kept her eyes closed, kissed back surprisedly. Momo gave her a few seconds to catch up before she shoved her tongue in her mouth. That was answered by equal enthousiasm on Mina's part; she let their tongue's dance for dominance.
Momo's hands moved to the front, up past her belly button, towards the loosened bra around her middle. Mina moaned throughout the kiss when she felt Momo tease the skin around her breasts. The blonde was always teasing, and whilst it made her orgasm a hundred times better, it wasn't appreciated much the moment she did it. Mina wanted to feel pleasure now, she didn't want to be teased endlessly until she'd eventually beg for it. Of course, that's what Momo wanted. She knew the blonde loved it when she couldn't control herself anymore, and fully gave herself over to the blonde's wishes.
"Ugh, just do it," she muttered against the blonde's lips. She heard Momo chuckle. Without any warning, the other girl placed her hands firmly on Mina's breasts, causing a loud moan to come out of the brunette's mouth. Immediately, she started to stroke her nipples. It only took a few seconds before she felt the hard bulges of Mina's hard nipples against her hand, idicating how turned on she already was.
Suddenly, Momo took her hands away, which caused Mina to look up disturbedly. She was wondering where they went, but in no time the blonde lifted her sweater — and with that her loosened bra too — over her head and threw them somewhere in a corner of her living room. Mina was left completely bare now, only wearing her too-tiny shorts and her fuzzy sucks. A shiver ran down her spine again, because it turned out the wall was rather cold against her hot skin.
Momo didn't waste a second and immediately wrapped her arms around her legs, lifting her up in the air. Mina let out a small chuckle. It was Momo's favourite position; to lift her up in the air. And Mina agreed on that. Because then she would not only enjoy Momo's mouth, but she could also see her tensed biceps and occasionally her abs, whenever she had her shirt off. No boy could top those muscles.
Her back was pressed against the wall, for support, and Momo's body. The blonde's nails digged into the skin of her legs, but Mina had never liked it as much as she did now. Momo didn't want to waste any time, and immediately started to kiss her breasts, continueing the trail it that had started in her neck. Every time her mouth moved a little lower, a little closer to Mina's nipples; it was almost inbearable. She went way too slow, way too slow. Mina wasn't used this pace of her girlfriend-.. no, fuckbuddy. Usually, by now, Momo's hand was already in her pants, teasing her clit and stroking the entrance of her vagina. Maybe because it was a special occasion? Mina wasn't a girl to celebrate special days, but Momo really seemed to care. It was almost as if she really wanted Mina to enjoy it. But all she wanted was for the blonde to fuck her hard, and well right fucking now.
Mina arched her back when Momo's mouth were now making their way down her left breast. It wouldn't be long until she would kiss her where she needed her the most. The brunette closed her eyes to enjoy the moment, wait for the right moment when a moan would escape her lips and her hands would tangle into the blonde's hair. But when she finally thought that moment had arrived... Momo just skipped it. She stopped right above her nipple, continueing her trail on her belly. Mina opened her eyes annoyedly, looking down at the blonde who was making her way to her belly button.
"Don't you forget anything?" she asked, completely thrown off. Momo looked up with a big grin formed on her face. She wiggled her eyebrows and shrugged.
"What did I forget?" she asked innocently.
"Don't you dare to make me beg for it, Momo," she said sternly. Momo laughed evilish and continued to blink cutely with her eyes. Mina bit her lip and kissed her passionately. Then she moved over with her mouth to her ear, partly because she wanted to turn on the blonde some more, partly because she wasn't able to look into her smug eyes when she said it. Her cheeks were red.
"My breasts," she moaned.
"Where?" Momo insisted. Mina hated her for that.
"You know where," she replied. Afterwards, she bowed back away. She placed her hand around Momo's neck and guided her face to her nipple. Momo chuckled and finally gave Mina what she wanted. The tip of her tongue touched her nipple, causing Mina to arch her back immediately. It didn't take long before she took it all in her mouth, sucking on it, playing with it with her tongue. Because she had to hold Mina with both hands, she decided to please her other breasts with her own hand. A deep moan escaped her throat. A yelp followed when she felt Momo softly bite down. She bit her own lip hard and held her breath. Momo looked up to see her face.
"Too much?"
"No, continue."
Momo laughed again. She bit lightly in Mina's hand, who was still stroking her other nipple, so that she would take it away. Momo performed the same on her other breasts, leaving the brunette all weak and needy inside. She couldn't help to rub her crotch over Momo's already, trying to get a little pleasure that the blonde was still holding from her.
"Princess is satisfied now?"
"Hmm-hmm," was all she replied, still with eyes closed. Momo returned to press kisses on her belly. It was better now, she could enjoy it more, but she was still aching for her to get down real fast. It took too long...
Mina made herself loose from Momo's grip, so she stood with two feet on the ground again. Momo looked up, a bit surprised. Immediately, the brunette grabbed the blonde's hand and pushed it down her pants, whilst she curled her other arm around Momo's neck to bring her closer to her. Their lips collided with force, making their teeth clack together. The blonde kissed her back, but her hand did not move further down her panties; she didn't even try to tease her as well! When the kiss ended, due to a lack of oxygen, all she did was laugh.
"You're too needy," she chuckled.
"I don't fucking care, I need you now," Mina moaned. "Or I'll do it myself."
Momo frowned her eyebrows at that and Mina looked endearingly back. Momo didn't like it when she was threatening to please herself when all Momo did was teasing. One time, it even got as far that Mina would get back to the bedroom herself, undress herself and start already. The blonde had immediately jumped on the bed, taking her fingers away , and starting to please her herself. After that, Momo never let her come that far, and always gave her what she needed, because she knew Mina meant it. It was also strangely turning on to masturbate while Momo was right in front of you.
"You wouldn't dare."
"I wouldn't even have to go to the bedroom, I can do it right here," Mina said. She let Momo's hand go, which she immediately took out of Mina's shorts. Instead, the opened the button herself, letting the jeans fall down until they hit the ground. She stepped out of them and kicked them away. Now, all that was left between them, was her underwear. Mina looked into the dark eyes of Momo, daring to stop her.
Mina touched her breasts another time, while a moan escaped her lips. She let her hands slide down; over her belly, to her lower stomach; over the curves of her hips; only to enter her panties slowly. First with her fingertips, then her whole fingers and eventually her whole hand. A small smile formed on her face when she felt how wet Momo had made her. She let her tongue run over her lips, biting upon her lower lip afterwards, all whilst never leaving Momo's gaze. The blonde had gotten something that best resembled hunger. Mina decided to tease her a bit. She let her hand move in circles, which defenitely didn't go unnoticed by Momo, but she did not touch anything. She moaned, and closed her eyes. She was playing the blonde, and it immediately had effect.
Momo growled her name.
"Mina, stop," she hissed. Mina opened her eyes and looked at her with the same endearing look. She saw that the vampire had folded her hands into fists. She defenitely had her now, the brunette knew, it would only take a little more to make her snap.
"Make me," she breathed. Momo showed her fangs, almost as if she was going to rip out her throat. The first time that she pissed her off that much, she had been incredibly scared that she would really hurt her, but Mina trusted Momo with more than her life nowadays. She trusted her with her heart, and she knew she wouldn't hurt it. She wouldn't hurt her. But she would loose her patience.
Mina repeated the same action — making a circling hand motion and moaning — hoping to drive her right over the edge. It only took a few seconds before Momo to loose it entirely. Her hand was rudely removed from her panties and her back slammed against the wall again. She hit her head and had to blink a few times to make the stars dissapear. But it was in vain, because hell, they returned again when she felt Momo's mouth on her clit. A loud moan escaped her mouth, her back arched and she squeezed her eyes shut. Her hands tangled in her hair, because she really needed to hold onto something. She hadn't even felt her panties dissapear.The blonde had probably ripped them — again.
The blonde pushed her legs further apart, so she had enough access. Without a warning, she brought two fingers into Mina, causing her to moan the blonde's name hard and shamelessly. She started to move them in and out, occasionally bending them to hit that special spot she knew Mina liked so much. At the same time, her mouth kissed, sucked at her clit, her tongue twirled circles around it, driving Mina crazier and crazier.
"Momo.." she continued to moan. Nothing was as hot as moaning Momo's name. At that moment it was the hottest thing she knew to say, and also the only thing. She remembered nothing anymore, but the person who made her feel like this.
Occasionally she'd feel the tips of Momo's fangs down below, but she pretended not to notice, especially when Momo tried to hide them as much as possible. She was really gentle when it came down to that and Mina was glad. One time she had even injured herself because of the fangs, and it had not been pretty. They hadn't had sex in a week because every time they tried, her little wound would open up again. Momo hadn't minded the blood, but it reminded Mina too much of period sex — which she defenitely did not approve of.
Momo seemed to feel her completely. She sped up at the right moment and slowly drove Mina to her edge. She was a lot more careful and sweet than she usually was. Mina couldn't say she minded. Sex with Momo often left her sore. When guys joked about a girl not being able to stand the next day after sex, Mina had always doubted it was true. She had never had that kind of feeling when she has had sex with boys. Most of the time it was actually quite dissapointing. But with Momo, she often had muscle soreness and bruises covering her body. And even though she loved Momo's roughness, she would be lying if she said she didn't like to be handled tenderly. It made everything so much more loving. Mina fell in love with the blonde due to her sweet touches, and not because of her rough ones.
Mina wanted to let it last forever, but she had already been incredibly turned on when Momo started, so it didn't take her long before her climax to build up in her lower stomach. She could literally feel it coming. Her moaning got louder, until the point where she couldn't hear the firm knocks on the door. Momo didn't slow down, either because she hadn't heard or just ignored it. It had happened before that someone ringed the bell when they were having sex, and they had decided to just not open the door as long as they weren't finished.
Momo stood up from her crouching position. Her second hand joined, so one was constantly thrusting and the other pleasing her clit to replace her mouth. The blonde pressed a long kiss upon her lips. Mina kissed back eagerly. She moaned against her lips. She felt Momo grin.
"Promise me you'll be mine forever," the girl whispered hoarsely into her ear. "And I'll be yours forever too."
Mina didn't have to think long. Gosh, wasn't this all she wanted?
"I do, I do, I do," she whimpered. "I promise, I'll be yours."
Momo smiled mischieviously and kissed her another time. Then, she sat back onto the ground. Her second hand got replaced by her mouth again, and the sudden rush of pleasure made her dizzy.

Her climax hit her like a slap in the face. Her whole body tensed up and a cry left the back of her throat. She tensed around Momo's fingers, and shudderd when Momo gave her clit one last long lick before she let the brunette ride out her orgasm. Momo stood back up to hold her weak body while she still enjoyed the last rushes of pleasure.
"MINA?!"
Mina's eyes shot open, startled at the sudden sound. They turned around at the very same moment, only to see the front door wide open and a heavily shocked Sana in front of them. Momo's eyes grew wide.
"Fuck!" she cursed. She dived under the blonde's arms to reach for her sweater, that was luckily large enough to cover her naked body almost completely. Her best friend was still staring at them with wide eyes and an open mouth. She tried to say something, but all that came out was a long 'Ehhh'. Mina sought her lingerie that Momo had carelessly trown around the room and put them on as quickly as possible. Her panties were indeed ripped, but her sweater was large enough to cover her buttocks too. Her cheeks were burning red when she turned around again. She couldn't imagine how they must look right now; Mina's hair was messed up, her body still sensitive and shaking from her orgasm, a tomato was nothing in comparement to her cheeks; Momo's mouth was still glinstering, smeared with Mina's juices, and so were her hands. The brunette bit her lip hard. She was afraid of what Sana would think of her. Okay, they had been best friends since kinder garten but still... It was a whole different thing to see your best friend climax right in front of you.
Sana's eyes shifted from Mina to Momo and back. Mina noticed the blonde slightly walk up to her friend, but it didn't get to her just yet. Momo whiped of her mouth with the back of her hand.
"S-so this is your boyfriend?" she asked. The surprisement was grifted into Mina's mind and she cringed at her friend's words.
"I-I never said it was a boy..." she said quietly.
"Well, no, you surely did not but you neither said she was this pretty," Sana said, whilst side-eying Momo. It was almost as if she was afraid to look at her. Momo was still walking up to her, and at that moment, Mina realized she had made a great mistake.
"MOMO, n-" she screamed, but Momo's hand had already shut itself around Sana's neck, causing her friend to scream out of utter terror. She had never seen the blonde in real action, except for that time in the alley when they met, but even then the girl had already been dying when Mina arrived. Mina's heart skipped a beat when she saw Momo smash Sana into the wall, causing her to whimper in pain. Her fingers were still strongly tightened around her throat, so her breathing sounded more like choking. When she called out Mina's name, it was almost inaudible. She clawed at Momo's hand, but the vampire wouldn't loosen her grip. Her friend was arching her back and tensing her whole body, trying to escape Momo's grip. It was all in vain. And all Mina could do was watch in horror how her friend was being strangled to death.
Sana called her name one more time before her eyes rolled back into their sockets and her body went limp. That's when Mina could finally move again. Her stiffened muscles suddenly sprang to life, and she ran up to the two blondes. Momo kept her friend up by her neck, still clutching, still squeezing. She pushed Momo away from Sana. Her friend fell on the ground, hitting her head hard in return. Mina immediately crouched down to take her head in her hands. She immediately inspected her neck and shivered when she saw the clawmarks and the already darkening purple spots from where Momo's hands had squeezed.
Mina felt herself tearing up at the gaze of her best friend. With shaking hands, she felt for her pulse. It took a few moments before she found it — which was probably the most scary thing in her life — but eventually she found it. It was steady, and Sana was breathing.
"You told her about us," she heard suddenly. Mina looked up. Momo had spit the words to her like they were poison on her tongue. Her eyes were back to that dark colour from the first night, the colour Mina feared so much. Momo's lips were pressed together until they formed nothing more than a thin dark pink line on her face. She breathed in hard and fast, as if she had just ran a marathon. Her fangs were beared.
Her stomach tightened in a knot and she found herself being actually afraid of what the blonde would do.
"N-no, I did not," she said quietly.
"THEN HOW DOES SHE KNOW ABOUT US?" Momo screamed, with an anger that she had never seen before.
"I don't know!" she said, louder this time. "You weren't exactly secretive when you left hickeys all over my body; Sana isn't stupid and-"
She felt the pain earlier than she saw it happen. Momo's hand had lashed out to her face, hitting her hard with the back of her hand. The pain spread through her whole face, causing everything to hurt. Her eyes, her cheekbones, her nose, her jaw. Everything hurt. A taste of blood filled her mouth. Mina's eyes widened, her breath got caught in her throat. Momo watched her with her dark, piercing eyes, her hand still lifted. She ran the tip of her tongue past her lips, feeling the frayed skin where her teeth had pierced through her skin. Even though everything hurt, she couldn't cry. Not yet.
Mina looked up to Momo.
"Out," she spit towards the blonde. "Get out of my house."
Momo's expression changed really quickly; from anger to disbelief to sadness to anger again. Her lip curled up and a growl left her lips.
"As the Princess commands," she hissed back. She spinned around on the back of her heels, strode off through the door and slammed it shut. The banging of the door made Mina's ears hurt.

Chapter Text

The following weeks, Mina and Momo didn't meet anymore. Momo didn't drop by at Mina's apartment, didn't even come to her whilst she was walking alone late at night. Mina found herself doing that quite a few times, hoping the blonde would appear and everything would be forgotten, that they could go back to the relationship they used to have. She longed for Momo's hands on her hips, her arms around her waist, her soft lips against hers... Not even the sex, she would give all of that up if Momo would just come back to her again and look at her with the same loving gaze as she used to. Sometimes, Mina wondered if Momo wasn't in love with her too, but she always rejected those ideas. She wondered how someone could leave when their lover asked them to stay and hold her, to comfort her, to love her. Momo always left. Mina knew she missed her though; otherwise she wouldn't come back, right?
But she didn't come back now, and Mina was slowly dying.

It was almost as if her whole life was drained away. She had very little energy to get up in the morning, knowing that Momo wouldn't wait for her on her couch at 9 o'clock when her ballet training had gone on longer than she expected. She never came to her ballet studio, even though Mina guessed she knew where it was. She never came to her when she wasn't alone or in a good mood. The girl somehow seemed to feel that. But now, she just wasn't there.
It was dissapointing, the first time when Momo wasn't there to wait her up. It had been a long day. She had been up since seven to get ready for her classes at the University and afterwards she had gone directly off to practise. Her mind had been too occupied to think about the fight of the previous day and she had expected Momo to be there when she came home. They'd cuddle first, maybe watch a movie whilst being snuggled up together, and when she felt good enough there were a few kisses. Eventually those would always turn out in sex, but Mina didn't mind that.
That evening, Mina came home in her dark apartment. No lights burning, no TV playing. The plants were dry on water, the fridge empty. Mina felt alone, and she couldn't get around the fact that she missed Momo.
The following days were even worse. The lonely feeling increased, causing to drive out all the other emotion out of her body. It was like her mind was a gaping emptiness. She could only force out a smile ever hour or so, but that was it. She missed Momo, and she regretted sending her away. Would she ever come back? God, what if she never came back?

Weeks passed, and Mina never forgot about the blonde. Luckily she led a busy life. She had her study, her training as a ballet dancer, and well, Sana.
After Sana had accidentally walked in on them — something that was still grifted into Mina's mind and she defenitely wasn't proud of — and Momo had knocked her out and left, Mina had immediately called an ambulance. They were at her apartment complex in less than a few minutes to pick up her friend. Mina was able to ride along. Luckily the employees in the ambulance already told her that she'd be fine. That eased Mina a lot, but she still felt incredibly guilty for putting her friend up with this.
Mina put up a lie when they told her how she passed out. She told the doctors that her friend had fallen on her head after stumbling over the step by her doorfraim. That did explain the passing out, but didn't explain the blue marks on her throat where Momo's hand had been. Mina simply told the doctors that she didn't know, and they left her alone after that, because of her watery eyes and quivering lip.
When Sana woke up, she apologized a thousand times, but the blonde already told her it was fine at the very first apology. She didn't seem to remember anything, although she did tell her that she had had this crazy dream about a vampire, which immediately made Mina's muscles tense up. But she didn't lay the link between the vampire and reality. Sana believed the story Mina told her; that she fell and hit her head. She didn't remember why her throat hurt so much, and Mina kept denying she knew, so the doctors just treated the bruises and let it slide. It wasn't serious after all.
Sana was released from the hospital, and despite the brunette's guilty feelings she treated her the same as always. She knew she didn't deserve a good friend like Sana, but the blonde helped to cope with her break-up with Momo — or whatever it was. Sana didn't knew she was Mina's medicine to stitch her heart, her morphine to her fresh wound, but she didn't need to know. She didn't know about Momo after all.

After a while, people started to notice that the normally shy but happy Myoui Mina acted differently. She was more introverted than ever, but this time she didn't breathe a positive kind of vibe. Her way of acting became a bit dark. Like a darkened sun, Mina didn't shine anymore. Her good grades faltered, her dancing became emotionless. She often laid on the couch in her spare time, watching some stupid ass comedy that she didn't even know the name off just so she could feel the feeling of laughing again.

But at a certain evening, maybe two to three months after the accident, she heard three knocks on her door. It was already past midnight and Mina was just getting ready in the bathroom to go to sleep. She was brushing teeth her teeth when the sound alerted her.
Her heart sprang up, immediately started to beat faster at the familiar knocking; she couldn't help to associate it with Momo. Even after two months, the brunette was still longing for the blonde, and even some simple knocking made her think of her. But who would knock at the door of the quiet girl who had pushed everyone away for the past month at half past one at night?
Her heart began to race, pulsing blood fast through her veins for the first time in a very long time. She whiped her mouth quickly and ran towards the front door to open it. She told herself that it was because she was tired and wanted to sleep badly; she wanted to handle this off and go to bed. It probably wasn't Momo, right?
But she couldn't help but to run her hand through her hair, to style her hair a little bit. Mina admitted that she didn't that much attention to her appearance anymore after Momo left, but she immediately became aware of her body odor, unwashed hair and the dark circles underneath her eyes. Maybe she shouldn't open the door... But it wasn't Momo, right? Then it wouldn't matter.
Her hand was already on the doorknob and she felt herself pushing it down. The door swung open, and not because Mina pulled it open, but by a force from outside. Mina felt their lips crash upon each other before she could see anything else. Just before her eyes fluttered shut, there was a flash of blonde hair. Every feeling she had ever felt exploded in her body. Anger, sadness, excitement, love, lust. Mina felt them all at once and didn't know what to do except to kiss back. Hands travelled all over body so fast she barely noticed it. The front door was still wide open and the cold breeze that entered the apartment made Mina shiver. But she didn't care, she only cared for her.
"I missed you," Momo breathed hoarsely into her mouth, when their lips parted for a moment so they could catch their breaths. "I want you so badly."
Mina could only moan in response. Her fingers curled around Momo's neck and pulled her closer for another kiss. It was a sloppy kiss, with their tongues all over the place. When Momo bit her lower lip, her fangs pressed hard into her skin. She had forgotten how sharp they were. Their hands didn't seem to know where to start. Mina moved from cupping the blonde's cheek to curling her fingers in her hair to letting them slide to her waist and pulling her even closer. She wanted to feel every inch of Momo to make sure she was real and not an hallucination.
She was only faintly aware that she was lifted. The door was kicked shut and Mina wrapped her arms around the blonde's neck when she started to walk towards the bedroom. Her back hit the pillows not soon after. They were only a second apart; Momo seemed to launch herself at Mina directly. Their lips connected again and it was the most heavenly feeling in the world. She felt her hands underneath her shirt and she didn't pull back. She had missed that feeling. She had missed Momo and the way she made her feel loved.
Her hands had barely discovered all of her body, her clothes weren't even off yet, when she already felt Momo enter her pants. A loud gasp left her lips.

Mina wettened her lips. They had grown dry due the panting and gasping. She was totally exhausted, even moving her arms hurt. It had been a while since Momo had stopped by and it was clear her body wasn't used to Momo's rough way of treating her anymore. But the soreness felt good. It made her feel alive again, for the first time in a very long time.
Mina snuggled up against Momo. The blonde had wrapped her arm around her shoulders. She let her head rest upon her nacked chest and breathed deeply in and out. Mina closed her eyes.
"I should get going..." Momo mumbled after a few mintes. Mina opened her eyes again, disturbed. She looked up into the dark eyes of her lover. They were exactly as she remembered them. Deep black, the kind of black where you would fall into and never would get out of. Mina was drowning in them, but they had gotten something colder since the last time they were together. Mina then noticed that something had changed between them, something that she'd probably never be able to repair. The brunette pulled the blackets up to her chin. Suddenly it grew a lot colder in the room, even though the sweat was still dripping off her body and the radiator was up high.
"Why?"
"I can't stay, you know that," Momo replied simply. There was no hint of love in her voice. She said it like she was talking about the weather. It stung.
The blonde shook the blankets off her still naked body and got out. Mina couldn't help but to let her eyes run over the contoures of her body, the way her curves were perfectly round; her abs were tensed when she lowered herself to the ground to pick up her lingerie; her nipples were hard because of the cold; her hair flew perfectly over her shoulders; her muscles moving underneath her pale skin. Momo was a sight for sore eyes. Only this image of her would be enough to make Mina wet all over again, if the question she was burning to ask wasn't on her tongue already.
"Because you don't want or because you can't?" she asked.
Momo turned her back towards Mina and fastened her bra. She didn't answer until she had put on her panties too. She turned her head towards the brunette and looked at her for a moment.
"Both," she said. That stung even more. Momo didn't want to be with her? Mina frowned her eyebrows.
"Did you come back because you missed me, or missed having sex with me?" she asked further. Her heart was starting to beat faster. What if she said she only missed the sex? Of course Mina had too, but she mainly just missed Momo.
Momo didn't answer immediately. She first sought her other clothes. Mina at first hadn't paid attention to her clothes at all. She only now saw that the blonde worn her usual black high-waisted shorts, a white blouse and white sneakers. The white made her almost seem innocent, Mina thought. Almost.
Momo put on her clothes. She turned around, running her hand through her hair.
"Both," she said. "What about you?"
Mina bit her lip.
"You know my answer," she said silently. Momo looked away and chuckled.
"Have your feelings not faded yet?"
"Not the slightest."
"Why didn't you move on?" Momo asked, whilst raising her eyebrows questioningly. Mina pouted her lips when she thought for a moment.
"I can't have another relationship and do this with you. If I get a new girlfriend, I can't have sex with you anymore. Two months is too short to get over someone completely and fall in love again. And even if I would have, I don't think I would have chosen her over you anyway."
"You're weird," Momo said, shaking her head. "Why would you fall in love with someone like me?"
The blonde pulled up her lip and beared her teeth; her fangs flashed in the moonlight that lighted the room. Mina sat up straight, covering her bare body with the blankets and shrugged.
"I guess I am weird. In several ways."
Because wasn't it weird — and stupid — to fall in love with a monster? Momo was unpredictable, often not in control, forgot the promise they made to not bite her. And wasn't it stupid to fall in love with someone who told you every time again that they didn't love you back? And still you clinged to them, afraid to let go, afraid to break off what you had already build up. Mina was afraid to loose Momo. And she had no idea how Momo felt. Whenever she thought to know what she felt, she was always proved wrong. Momo was a diffecult person to love, but Mina had fallen for her anyway.

She was a stupid, naïve girl, she found out then.

Chapter Text

Momo left. She only pecked Mina's lips as a good-bye. She didn't even tell her when she'd come back. When the front door was shut and Momo was gone, Mina was flooded with an incredible lonely feeling. Out of despair, her eyes started to fill with tears. She didn't hold them back, and let them spill over her cheeks in an attempt to calm herself down. Maybe it was just the stress...
But it only made her more upset. Sobs were cutting through her body, making her heart ache with every tensing of her muscles. She muffled her face in the pillows, but that didn't help. She tried to hold her breath, but that didn't help. She tried to think of happy things, but that didn't help. Mina cried until she couldn't cry anymore. She only stopped when she was too tired to go on. It was 3 AM when she finally fell asleep, completely drained from energy.

The next morning she felt even worse. If was as if she suffered from a hangover; her head hurt like a bitch, she could hardly keep her eyes open and she defenitely didn't want to get out of bed. But today she had to get to her classes, so she forced herself out of bed. Mina was still painfully aware that she was still naked. Last night she hadn't bothered to get dressed again and she regretted that now. She was only reminded about Momo's leaving again.
Mina walked up to the bathroom to clean herself. She sighed when she saw the bite and claw marks on her body again. Her back hurt of the scratches Momo had made. There were hickeys all over her neck and collar bones, even one on her inner thigh. Last night she hadn't noticed anything of the pain, but her whole body hurt now. Her muscles were more sore than ever. That'd promise something for tonight's dance practise, she thought. Would she be able to bear the comments of her collegues?
She tried to cover them up as well as possible, but she doubted anyone would be fooled.

Mina couldn't help to occasionally think of Momo. The blonde never really left her mind. Whatever she did, she seemed to do it for Momo. Work hard on her exercises? So she could go home early to Momo. Eat well? So she wouldn't be hungry when Momo was around. Eat peppermints? So her breath wouldn't smell. Wrap up the ballet practise early? So she could be with Momo.
It was strange to suddenly have a purpose again. For the past two months her homework, her classes and her ballet practise couldn't take long enough. Whenever she was home early, she went over to Sana's to stay there until she was tired enough to go to bed immediately when she got home. She couldn't handle it being alone anymore in her apartment; she needed the constant presence of Momo to feel good.
Now that she had come back, Mina wouldn't be alone anymore, so there was no need to dwell on the things she had to get done.

That night, Mina rushed back home.
A small voice in the back of her head warned her that this might be a one-time thing. That Momo doesn't want to visit her every night like they used to and repair their old relationship slowly. Mina pushed that thought of her mind immediatly, denying it could ever turn out that way, not wanting it to turn out that way. She wanted Momo to be there when she came back.
Around eight o'clock she entered her apartment complex. She rushed up the stairs, up to her front door. The brunette pulled out the keys hastily, letting them fall due to her haste. Mina took them again and put the right key in the lock, turning it with an enthousiasm that she hadn't felt in weeks. She controlled herself enough to let the door swing open like she always did. Her eyes were met with the light of her lamps snapped on. From the corner of her eye, she saw Momo sit on her dark grey couch, playing with an empty glass that was red stained of the drink that it had held. The first time she had seen Momo drink blood out of one of her glasses she had been disgusted. She had probably washed it a thousand times before daring to drink out of it herself again, and even then her drink tasted like blood. But over the span of time she had started to care less and less about it.
Mina laid keys on the small table next to the door, together with her bag. Mina took of her coat, pretending the blonde's presence didn't excite her as much as it really did.
"You're early," Momo commented. Mina only then let herself take a look at the blonde, whose eyes had been glued on her body from the moment she stepped in. Mina smiled and brushed the strands of light brown hair out of her face.
"Well, I wanted to get home early," she replied. Momo chuckled. She sat up straight from her comfertable position and placed the empty glass on the coffee table. The glass clinked when it hit the wood.
Mina walked over to the kitchen to grab something to drink, possibly something to eat. She opened the refridgerator and looked. She heard the cracking of the springs of her couch and footsteps in her direction. Mina listened carefully. She still let her eyes run over the food and beverages in her fridge, as if she was really gonna pick something. She had eaten a quick sandwich on the way back to home and even though her body wasn't satisfied yet, it would be enough for now.
At the moment her fingers closed themselves around a water bottle, she felt two arms wrap around her waist as well. A cold body was pressed to hers from behind. She felt Momo's curves on her skin, her breathing in her neck. A sigh escaped her lips. How much had she missed this. Mina left the water bottle in the refridgerator and closed the door again. A kiss in her neck that made her head cock to the left, so Momo would have better access. She closed her eyes, enjoying.
"I missed you," she said. She felt the blonde smile against her skin when she pressed another kiss in her neck.
"I know," Momo replied. Mina opened her eyes at that, and bit her lip softly. Weren't you supposed to say 'I miss you too' back?
Momo left her neck and walked around her, so she was now facing her from the front instead from the back. Mina let herself gaze into those deep dark eyes. Momo looked back with some sort of tenderness in her eyes that she had only seen very little in the time they had known each other. When she placed her hand in Mina's neck, it was almost sweet. Both girls leaned into the kiss at the same time, meeting perfectly half way.
Their lips brushed over each other, in an almost perfect way. Their tempo was exactly the same, causing it to be very much enjoyable. Momo took her time with Mina. Usually it would only take a few seconds for their tongues to touch, but this time, Momo seemed to be in for a bigger make-out session. Mina wasn't complaining. She had waited forever for Momo to finally put some love into her touches and take her time. Mina would love the foreplay to last longer than it usually did. Sure, it had something rough and special about the way she was usually treated — turning on too, even. But she was still a girl. A girl who liked to be loved.
The blonde stepped into her direction, causing Mina to step backwards until her back hit the mahogany wooden kitchen table. She broke the kiss for a few seconds so she could sit on top of it, making it a little more comfertable. It was a nice variation for both of them; Momo was the taller one of the two and usually had to look down whilst kissing, and Mina had to look up. Now the roles were switched, because Mina was a good few inches taller now. They continued their easy kissing. Mina wrapped her arms around the blonde's neck, pulling her closer. Momo stood in between her spread legs, as close to the table she physically could, placing her hands upon Mina's hips.

That continued for a while. Momo really seemed to take her time until a point where it was almost boring. Mina was the one to initiate the french kissing, which was happily replied by the blonde. Their tongues danced in each other's mouths, but it was still too slow. There was not a hint of lust in Momo, which caused her to stop. Mina pulled back — in her way pecking the other girl's lips another time — and smiled. She kept her face close.
"Why are you so sweet?" she said softly. Momo looked up, almost confused.
"I thought you wanted that?" she replied. Mina chuckled, pecking her lips another time.
"Well yes, but it's a bit dull, don't you think? Make-out sessions are for lazy Sunday mornings, not when I expected to... you know."
Mina nodded her head towards the bedroom, idicating she meant sex. Her cheeks coloured pastel pink. Even after all that time she was still prudish when it came to words like that. Momo chuckled now too.
"You know, I finally begin to understand why men say they don't understand women. Really, Mina, I have no clue what you want anymore."
Mina leaned closer and placed a long kiss upon Momo's lips.
"You," she replied. Their eyes met, and she knew they were thinking the same thing. They kissed again, this time with a lot more passion. But it was still sweet, not as rough and lustfull as usual. Mina couldn't say she disliked the change.
Momo lifted her up from the table like she weighed nothing and walked over to the bedroom.

It was half past eleven when they laid next to each other in Mina's king sized bed. Their breaths were still fast and raging through their body, their centers still a little wet, their bodies covered in sweat. It had been one of the best experiences in Mina's life. Finally she didn't feel like she was some sex object for Momo, that she was more than a good fuck now and then and really meant something to her.
The brunette rolled over to Momo's side and wrapped her arms around her waist. She let her head rest upon her chest, like she had done yesterday.
"Will you stay tonight?" she asked. Mina was almost entirely sure she would. Momo had never treated her this sweet and loving before. Maybe the vampire had changed, maybe she would stay tonight.
"No, I can't," came the hard response. Mina bit her lip and looked down. Her grip around the blonde faltered. It suddenly didn't feel as nice anymore. She had really thought that Momo would stay, that this was the beginning of something new, something better, but it seemed that Momo really had only come back for the sex.
The brunette adjusted her body a little bit, so she wasn't leaning as much on Momo anymore. They stayed quiet for a few more minutes. A feeling of loneliness spread suddenly across her body. Even though the blonde was still right next to her — even had her arm wrapped around Mina's shoulders — she still felt so shut out. She bit her lip, trying to let the sad feeling to go away by biting hard and deep into her skin. But it didn't help. At that was left was a small wound, the taste of blood in her mouth and her eyes filled with tears. She wanted to cry, to relieve stress, but she knew Momo wouldn't comfort her. And that made it even worse, knowing that the blonde would rather go away than to help her. It only made her realize more that Momo wasn't her girlfriend and never would be. Even though they were so close, they seemed to be so far apart. She had diffeculty keeping her eyes dry.

Momo left after an hour. Mina could only nod at that. Every time, she kept hoping that Momo would stay, and she let the blonde break her heart every day again when she did leave. But the empty feeling had never been this strong. Their eyes didn't meet when Momo left the bedroom. She didn't catch the longing gaze of the blonde, nor her hesitating at the door. Mina had simply turned to her side, placed her head on the pillows and stared down. She knew she'd cry if she looked up now... And it'd be best for the both of them if she did not.
"See you tomorrow," the blonde murmeled. Mina 'hmm-ed' in response and closed her eyes. The door to her bedroom was left open, so she could hear the front door shut when Momo left. At the moment Momo had gone, a single tear escaped the corner of Mina's eye. She squinted her eyes even closer and took a deep breath. When she opened them again, she couldn't see anything. Her sight was blurry because of the tears.

Chapter Text

The next few weeks were perhaps even worse. Mina started to feel worse every day Momo showed up. She couldn't bring herself to like it anymore, whatever Momo did. Her touches didn't feel the same. The roughness was simply annoying and a bit painful. The mask of adrenaline and love that had usually covered it was gone now, and it only left the scraping of Momo's fangs against her already sensitive skin. One time she even had to cry because it hurt so much. The bruises that formed on her body, the hickeys that were left there the next morning, the soreness off her muscles weren't a result of unconditional love anymore. It only hurt, a lot. She didn't take pride in them anymore, but despised them. Whilst she usually hadn't cared much for covering them up - since there were often too much to cover all - she now tried to pick button-ups and jeans to cover everything up, even when the heath was blasting outside.
But that wasn't even the worst part of that all. Mina could live without sex, without wanting to be touched. She had never much cared for it anyway, and had only gotten interest when she had met Momo. She could live with only just seeing the blonde from time to time.
The scary part was that Mina could feel herself fall out of love. She could feel that with every second that passed, she felt that she needed the blonde less and less. Whilst she had often day-dreamed about how it would be to have Momo's arms wrapped around her again and her soft plump lips pressed upon hers, she often found herself not thinking about her at all. Sometimes, it even felt as a burden to hear the three knocks on her door. Because she knew what would happen next. They'd have sex, Momo would leave Mina with an emptiness in her stomach and tears in her eyes, only to wake up the next morning with a saddened heart and a feeling that she either wanted all of Momo, or none of her at all. The sex wasn't enjoyable anymore, it was part of her day-to-day routine. She could almost scedule it in already. The only thing that variated sometimes was the time at which Momo appeared. But she always did, she never skipped. And Mina actually wished she'd stay away. Because she didn't want to feel sad anymore. She didn't want to be alone at night anymore. She wanted Momo to be close to her, or not at all.

Momo seemed to notice that her lover didn't like her as much as she used to anymore. While she preffered the raw kind of touches, she toned it down to try to make it fit to the brunette's needs. She kissed her longer, more tenderly than she had ever done before. They had once kissed for half an hour straight prior to sex, but Mina wouldn't budge. Whenever their lips met, it felt like Mina tried to make them part as soon as possible again. When Momo pressed on, the brunette would kiss back, but it felt indifferent. She didn't enjoy it anymore, neither seemed to want her anymore with that burning passion fuelled with her love for her. It almost felt like kissing a doll, something that wasn't alive, something that just did whatever you wanted her to do. It made Momo feel weird in the stomach, she couldn't exactly pin down what emotion it was that played with her heart.

Momo started to drop by less often, which was both a burden and a gift to both girls. Mina found that, now that Momo didn't drop by every evening, she liked it better. There was more time to do the stuff she liked. For months, she hadn't been able to watch her favourite shows, or drop by at Sana's often. But now that she had some extra spare time, she had more time to pay attention to everything and everyone else she loved.
But at the same time, she missed her. God, she missed Momo so much it almost felt like the blonde had personally ripped out her heart. Because she missed her presence, so so much. She stayed up every night, hoping the blonde would appear on her doorstep. Maybe it was even worse than before, because she never knew whether Momo came or not. The emptiness got mixed up with dissapointed, which, perhaps, made her feel even more melancholic. Mina was trapped in a big dilemma where either outcome would make her feel bad. If Momo came by every night, she would be sad because she'd leave. When she didn't drop by, she'd miss her endlessly. Unless Momo wanted to give her her everything, nothing would change.

"What has happened to us, Mina?" Momo sighed, at an evening in early January.
The year had turned into a new one, but Mina didn't feel much better. She usually made this huge bucket list of the things she wanted to accomplish this year, but honestly, she couldn't think of more than 'Make Momo want me like I want her'. Her life revolved around the blonde nowadays. She didn't blame her though, in fact, it was her own fault for letting it come to this.
"What do you mean?"
Mina nuzzled her face into the crook of Momo's neck, exhaling slowly. They were naked underneath the sheets, still sweaty. It was a familiar feel nowadays. Her arm was draped over Momo's belly, but she was tensed, as if the touch of Mina made her skin burn. She didn't take her arm away though. Maybe she was selfish. She probably was.
Momo stayed quiet for a moment.
"We hate each other," she eventually said.
"I don't hate you," Mina replied immediately. She felt Momo shift her head to look down to her.
"Well, I hate this."
This made the brunette look up. Momo's dark eyes would've blended perfectly with the darkness of Mina's bedroom, if it wasn't for the white in her eyes. Her skin and hair seemed to glow because of the little streams of light that the moon cast into the room. She looked beautiful. Mina wondered if Momo thought she was beautiful too. She caught the blonde staring at her lips more often than not, but she had decided long ago that it was because she wanted sex rather than love. It meant nothing.
"What do you mean?" she asked again.
"We are not like we used to be," Momo said slowly. "And I think that's a bad thing."
Mina made a sound, which could be classified as a mix between a huff and a snort.
"And you really don't understand why?" she asked, maybe a bit more forcefully than she meant it to be. Momo cocked her head to the left, like a puppy that didn't understand a command. She didn't have to answer for Mina to get it.
"Because we're not robots that can do things without feeling," she went on. "We are humans. Well, one of us is, anyway. And we have got feelings. As much as I would like not to feel, I can't help to. And because my feelings get too strong, this-" Mina made a signed with her hand to both of them,"-is now awkward."
"Then what did I do wrong?"
Mina frowned her eyebrows. Was this really Hirai Momo who asked what she did wrong? The almighty vampire with no feelings? The woman that made her fall for her so hard but pretended not to notice? And not to care? Then why did she ask a question like this? Why didn't she just leave, like always? She always chose for the easy option out. Mina didn't understand why not now.
But if they were going to have this conversation, she was defenitely not going to let her go off easy.
"You didn't do anything wrong," Mina replied softly. She avoided eye contact with Momo, afraid that those big dreamy eyes would make her say stuff she didn't mean. She would soften her words too much.
"You know what went wrong, Momo."
The blonde huffed annoyedly, causing the brunette to look up again.
"So this drama is all because I refused to be your girlfriend?" she hissed. Mina, startled because of Momo's sudden mood swing, backed up a little bit. She blinked confusedly and took her time to think of an answer.
"Yes," she eventually said.
"So it's my fault?"
"I didn't say that, did I?" Mina replied. She suddenly felt very tired, and wished that they wouldn't have to talk about this now. It was a little after midnight and she was tired.
"So it's yours?"
"I'd like to say that it's both of our faults but we both know that it's mostly my fault," Mina sighed. As much as she hated to admit it, her feelings were causing all of this. If only she couldn't just have fallen in love with Mom, then everything would've been fine.
But that hurt. It hurt to wish for that. Because the blonde deserved someone who loved her. Momo had been hurt way too many times, and a part of Mina just knew that she hid herself behind all those walls. If only she could break them down and make her feel really loved, maybe she would love her back.
And she didn't want to get rid of her feelings. Even though being in love with her hurt like hell, it was also a very good feeling. It's scary to know you could give up everything for one person, but at the same time, Mina loved the feeling of it. She liked to fantasize about their lives if only Momo would give in to her. She pictured her holding Momo's hand in public. Going on dates together to the cinema, or just watching a movie at home together. In all the time that they had known each other, they had never even watched a movie together.
Mina got up from the bed. She felt a bit nauseous to her stomach. She wished she had never started this conversation at all. Being still naked, she got to her closed to get herself some underwear. Some simple shorts, a comfertable sport bra, one of her sleeping shirts and the shorts she had worn the day before. Momo stayed in bed, watching her and every move she made.
"Don't you want me anymore?" she asked sharply.
"I do want you. You know I do," she said softly. Her voice was flattened, she even noticed that herself, so there was no doubt that Momo hadn't noticed it too. She sighed at her own lack of being able to act well.
"You sound like you don't," Momo replied. She got up from the bed now too, seeking her clothes together from the floor. Whilst Mina thought of her answer, she got dressed too.
"I didn't mean it like that," Mina sighed. Momo pulled a face, obviously not content with her answer. She buttoned the last few buttons of her blouse up, leaving the upper two open, so that just a little bit of her breasts were visible. It was enough to drive a girl mad, really.
"Then what do you mean?" she hissed at her. "Because you really are not making any sense."
With those words, Momo walked back to the living room. Mina hopped after her. Obviously she had pissed Momo off now, and she regretted it deeply that she had started this stupid conversation in the first place. She didn't know what to say. Mina wanted Momo to stay, that they could talk this through, but the words wouldn't leave her mouth. She was scared that they would never leave her mouth. Whatever she felt was already worth feeling guilty about without admitting it to Momo.
What was she supposed to say? That she was in love? That she couldn't fall asleep at night without thinking of the blonde? That she wanted her to be her girlfriend? Hold her hand, and make her feel loved? That their relationship was in fact deeper than just sex, even though Momo wouldn't admit so. Mina wanted to cuddle with her, and kiss her good night, and take care of her when she is sick. She wanted Momo to do the same for her. Mina wanted to be reassured by Momo when she was nervous for a test, and be encouraged by her when she had another ballet performance. And even though Momo would tell her she wouldn't be able to make it to the performance on time, Mina would spot her in the audience anyway. She wanted to come home to a surprise dinner, made by Momo, or surprise the blonde with presents and flowers. To count down the days to their anniversary and do something amazing to celebrate it. To maybe eventually ask her to marry her, and live forever with her.
And because she couldn't get all of that, her body has just turned numb. From the moment Momo and she had fought, her body was just numb. She didn't feel how loving Momo's touches were, and didn't see the tortured gazes the blonde cast at her when she turned her back around. Mina had closed herself off and shut Momo out, to protect her own heart. Maybe, only maybe if she would shut her out enough, she would fall out of love with her. And then everything would be okay.
But at the moment, she still was in love. And she couldn't explain everything to Momo just now, because it hurt like hell.
"I can't explain it..." she mumbled.
Momo turned her head around, and squinted her eyes together when her gaze landed on Mina. The brunette turned her head to the ground, unable to look back.
"What do you mean?" Momo sneered. "You can't explain why you suddenly shut me out? Is this all a mindless game to you? If you're doing this just to mess with me then I am going to leave right fucking now."
Momo's words hurt Mina's ears. She cringed.
"I am not doing this to hurt you, I swear," she said. Her voice broke down half way the sentence, causing the end to come in a sob. Momo clenched her jaws.
"Then why are you acting so weird around me lately? It's like you're disgusted," Momo spat out to her. Mina cringed again at her words. It hurt her, even though she knew it was true.
"I didn't know you were that affected by it.." she said softly. Momo let out a huff and crossed her arms in front of her body.
"I should really go," she hissed, through gritted teeth. The blonde started to make her way towards the door, but Mina ran after her, grabbing her wrist just before her hand could close itself around the door knob of her front door. Momo turned around to her, shooting her a vicious glance. Mina would've gotten scared if she wouldn't have known Momo for more than a year. Or maybe she just didn't have anything to loose.
"Don't, please," she pleaded, almost crying. Her sight was blurry already because of the tears she held in so strongly. She didn't want to cry. But it was in vain. Myoui Mina was a girl who cried easily, and once more her tears were flowing richly down her cheeks. She saw Momo's gaze lower to her tears. She pulled up her nose in digust of Mina's weakness. She couldn't help it.
"And why not? You clearly don't give a shit about me," the blonde said in a low voice. She shook her hand loose from Mina.
"Then what am I supposed to say?!" Mina snapped, when Momo again tried to go over to the door. "Nothing is good enough for you! I can't erase my feelings and when I try to make them go away, I suddenly 'don't give a shit about you'!"
Mina was breathing hard and loud, she was panting. Her eyes were opened widely while her eyes pierced in Momo's. The brunette cursed under her breath and ran with her hand roughly through her hair. It hurt because her hair had gotten tangled over the course of the night. She looked back up to the blonde again.
"And honestly, I don't understand why you're making a scene right now. You didn't want me. You left me every single night without feeling guilty when you knew it'd hurt me. So why are you now complaining that I took my distance from you to protect my own heart?"
Momo stayed quiet for a moment, then huffed.
"I had no idea that you were so affected when I left. Didn't I always come back the day afterwards?" she said angrily. Mina crossed her arms in front of her chest.
"But I didn't want that. I didn't want you to leave and return the next day. I wanted you to stay. To cuddle up with me, and wake me up with good morning kisses and make me breakfast. I wanted you to hold me and reassure me, to love me. But you didn't. So you literally have no right to complain right now," Mina hissed back. She was surprised by her own fury. Maybe it had all been bottled up too long as sadness and pain, causing it to spill out of her mouth in anger. Mina didn't want to be mean to Momo. She didn't want to fight. But it frustrated her that she had struggled for the past year with her feelings and that Momo was getting mad at her for protecting herself. That wasn't selfish, even though Momo made it appear to be. She was just protecting her heart from further harm.
"You are asking me something I can't bring up. To not make you attached to me too much, I leave. Is it too much to ask from you that you don't treat me like a pile of shit?" Momo replied.
"Like a pile of shit? Are you kidding me right now?" Mina said. "So, you want me to go back to the days I adored you? That I spend nights awake thinking of how it would be if only you agreed to stay with me? Or perhaps that my mind was completely occupied with you all day? My heart would flutter when you would kiss me, and it wasn't because I wanted you. I was in love with you, Momo. I still am in love with you. Are you really asking me to go back to that? To have my heart ripped out every night because you just wouldn't stay?"
Momo looked at her in disgust. Her nose was pulled up and her teeth were bared. The tips of her fangs shone dangerously in the faint light that was cast from one of her lamps in the livingroom. Her eyes were darker than ever. Her blonde hair fairer than ever. Mina's heart was beating fast and her breathing was loud and uneven. Fighting with Momo exhausted her, but she wasn't planning to stop until the moment she had said everything that laid on her heart.
"You know, you were much more fun when you weren't in love," Momo spat at her. "Now let me through. I want to leave. As in "'I won't stay with you'."
Momo mimicked Mina's at the end of her sentence, causing a wave of disgust for the blonde to run through Mina's body. Momo pushed her away from the door. Mina stumbled aside, almost losing her balance. Sometimes it was funny how easily she could get thrown off her feet in a room that wasn't the ballet practising room.
She didn't plan on letting Momo get away though. As soon as she re-found her balance again, she raced back to the door. Momo had already pulled it open, but it slammed shut when Mina's body bumped against it.
"Let me through, Mina," Momo said dangerously. Her voice had dropped low, and almost came out in a growl. Mina wasn't afraid though. She knew that Momo would never hurt her, not a single bit. So she stayed in front of the door.
"Or what? Are you going to leave for good?" Mina asked. She felt her eyes tear up again. They started to drip down her cheeks once more. Her lower lip shook. Was she really this desperate to keep Momo here? At this point, she didn't know. She didn't know anything.
"Get out of my way, Mina," Momo said, with a raised voice this time.
"We need to talk this through," Mina replied, in the same raised voice. She let the doorknob go from her hands and grabbed roughly onto Momo's arm.
"Maybe I don't want to talk it through anymore."
This caused Mina's arm to loose its grip on Momo's arm. The blonde shook her off immediately. She took her arm back roughly.
"So you're really going to leave.." she said quietly. Her tears had stopped rolling over her cheeks, but so had her heart. It felt like she had turned into a statue. She couldn't believe that this was happening. How could this be happening to her? Hadn't she given Momo her everything?
The blonde looked at her with a weird expression that Mina couldn't exactly pin down. It was a mixture of different emotions, but most of all it seemed to be pity. Pity and disgust. Mina felt filthy and terrible.
"Wouldn't it be the best for both of us?" Momo eventually said. Mina's heart felt like it was ripped from her chest. Not only was it cut in a million pieces, it was stepped on a billion times as well. If Momo was going to leave her, she didn't think she'd be able to survive. Not a second time... Not for good. It was too much. "Now get away from me, Mina. Or else I will have to use force."
Momo's voice had darkened again. A shiver ran down Mina's spine. She clutched to Momo's arm, desperately to keep her here.
"Get away from me Mina!" Momo yelled. Her voice cracked because of the force she put behind it. With her other arm, she opened the door again, but Mina had locked her arms around the blonde.
"P-please, I'll die if you leave me like this," Mina cried. She was sobbing completely now, and didn't care anymore. She needed Momo to admit that she'd comeback. Mina honestly believed that she wouldn't survive it if Momo left her. Maybe she should've let her go back then..
"It's better if I go!" Momo replied back, with a hint of pleading in her voice. Mina just strengthened her grip and shook her head furiously. Tears ran down her cheeks.
"Go AWAY!" Momo bellowed. With an enormous force she pushed Mina back. The brunette stumbled and fell backwards.

There were two dull achings. One on the side of her head, which appeared first and seemed to be the worst. And eventually, a few seconds later, one at the back of her head. She was just concious enough to feel with the tips of her fingers to her temple. She felt something wet, but wasn't able to see it before she lost conciousneses. She heard Momo scream her name... It was the last thing she heard. She wouldn't have wanted it any different.

Dying was something that was overly exaggerated. In movies. In books. In poems.
People died horrific deaths in movies, by monsters, zombies, nature disasters, or at the hand of someone with a gun.
In books, they died the same way. Poems only told the tormented pain of the people that were their loved ones. You never hear what it's like to die. Mina was able to tell you now.

Dying was very simple. It was like you were slowly fading into darkness. Even when you have smashed your head into the table and your body should be in terrible pain, you could barely feel anything.
Darkness ereased your vision. Your body won't move anymore, even though you'd want to. You can't even lift a finger. You can only think and realize that you are dying. But when the realization hits you, you can't be anything but okay with it. At least, Mina didn't feel a burning desire to wake up again. In fact, it was rather peaceful. There wasn't any pain, even though she reckoned she must've bled much. Her body was limp and numb. Her mind faded slowly, almost as if falling asleep. The last thing she had heard was Momo's voice.

Mina realized Momo had never been in love with her. At least, not the way Mina had been with Momo. She was not able to control herselfself, she was driven by obsession rather than love. Once you're aggressive, you're not idealizing, you're not in love. All that's left is obsession. In Momo's case, it was the obsession with sex, with knowing your partner would give up everything for you, for liking the fact that you can control someone that way.
Mina realized that too late.

But did she regret anything? She couldn't say she did. Because Momo made her feel everything at once and made Mina experience true love for the first time. Ending your life like that was almost worth it.

Chapter Text

For the next few months, the police signaled a serial killer in Tokyo. Dozens and dozens of innocent victims. A cool-blooded murderer who injured and mutilated their targets first, causing them to loose a lot of blood, before killing them entirely. Strange marks in their neck at the place where the aorta meets the skin. Every night a new victim. Every night another unsolved crime. It was driving the police nuts that the fingerprints they found on the victims were not matching any resident in Tokyo, let alone in the rest of the country. They seemed to have been killed by a ghost.

Hirai Momo had tried to call for people when Mina fell and didn't got up again, but no one had heard her scream. She had kneeled down by her lifeless body. First shaking her, asking her to get up. Then furiously tugging at her arms. Eventually biting her, hoping that her venom would resurrect her back to life. But she was gone already. At last, she pressed a kiss upon her forehead.
A neighbour found Mina in the morning. Momo had left the door wide open, in hope that someone would find her precious lover. She wasn't able to call for help another time. Her body failed to work. Not only couldn't she make a sound, she couldn't feel anything anymore. There was only one thought that entered her mind, and kept on repeating and repeating until those words were all she knew: You are a monster.

Her time with Mina had made her forget that she in fact was a monster. It was almost as if the brunette had made her human again. Basic human emotions had returned to her body. Love, lust, desire, anger, sadness. All those years she had felt completely numb. She had almost forgotten what it was like to live. But Myoui Mina had resurrected her from the dead. And she had liked it. She disgusted herself.
Being with Mina was a gift she had never been able to appreciate enough, she only realized that when she was gone. She shouldn't have made the choices she had made. If life hands you lemons, you make lemonade. You don't wait for the lemons to get mouldy. That's exactly what Momo had done. And she would never forgive herself for it. She should've cut their relationship off right from the start.

Momo watched how ambulance employees carried Mina's lifeless body out of her apartment. To reanimate her body was hopeless, she had been gone too long before they finally found her. Momo couldn't imagine how her body must feel like. Her fragile, sweet body, where she had run her hands over so many times so carelessly. She wished she had done it more thorougly now.
Was it cold? Her body limb? Her eyes, had they fallen shut, or were they still open? Momo hadn't paid attention. She had been crying too much. To cry so heavily after years of not feeling anything felt like her body was ripped apart. At least, she knew that her heart had ripped. It had burst in thousands, millions, billions little pieces and has vanished. She didn't have a heart anymore. She didn't feel anything at all besides the everlasting sadness. The numbness had returned at the moments she felt a bit better.

She had watched how the Myoui family had gone to the hospital, and eventually how the ambulance had brought Mina's body away to the mortuarium. Momo had followed the car and had snuck into the building. When everyone was gone at night, she resurrected from her hiding spot, and went to seek her lover.
They had laid her on an iron observation table, with a white sheet covering her face and body. Only a little bit of her arm was visible from under the cloth. Her skin had gotten white. Momo had wanted to lift it, but before she could do anything, her body was ripped apart by a series of sobs again that lasted through the whole night. She hadn't been able to stand anymore, and had fallen on the floor. Her back rested against the wall, her head in her hands, her body shaking. Her cries echoed through the empty building, full of dead people. Because, wasn't she dead too?
She stayed in the mortuarium as long as Mina stayed there.

Momo visited the funeral. She had bound her blonde hair up in a ponytail, the way Mina had once commented looked so nice on her. It made her cheekbones stand out even more. She didn't care about her cheeksbones. If you broke them both at once it would hurt less than loosing her.
She was wrapped in black clothing, like the rest of the people. No one questioned who she was. No one asked. Everyone was silent. They mourned. She had spotted Mina's friend, Sana, crying. Momo mourned, too. But she didn't share a single tear back then. Mina was hers, had been hers, and to cry with other people about her death made her feel like she was only a person out of hundreds. But she wasn't, she knew she hadn't been. She would do her deficit if she would cry now.
So Momo watched. From the back of the crowd, so no one would notice the strange girl. And she kept looking. She didn't look away when they carried her chest to her grave. Her parents had chosen a beautiful white marble tombstone, with her name engraved in graceful black letters. Momo couldn't have chosen better.
Momo dared herself to keep on looking. Because she wanted to take in her white, beautiful, dead face before she was buried under the ground for good. She needed to. Or else she'd forget.
Oh, she wouldn't ever forget her face. But she'd forget what she had done to her. Momo was scared that she'd only remember the happy times. She would never forget those, but she wouldn't want to loose the memories she was making right now. Because otherwise she might forgive herself. And she never wanted to forgive herself. Ever.

She had loved Mina. She had been in love with Mina. Momo had known that all along.
Her choices wouldn't make sense to anyone else but her. If you are a monster, you hurt people. It was basically the defenition of a monster. Momo would have hurt Mina too if she would've given in to her emotions. A monster can't love their prey. A monster can't love anyone.
So she had kept her feelings from Mina. She didn't deserve a girlfriend as good as Mina. She should find someone else to love, someone that can give her everything she deserves. Someone that can hold her at night, and will not leave the night. Someone who can live off of normal human food, and can kiss her without feeling guilty. Someone who isn't selfish and therefor keeps coming back to enjoy her company whilst knowing they shouldn't. Someone, anyone. A person, who isn't named Hirai Momo.
When it finally became clear that Mina loved Momo, she couldn't be happier. But she promised herself at that very moment that she would not act upon it. She couldn't, for the sake of Mina. Hurting her whilst loving her was her biggest fear.

Pretending not to care was the hardest thing she had ever done. It might've seemed easy for her to leave, but she only made it look that way. Perhaps, that way Mina would fall out of love with her. It didn't happen, and Momo was desperate. She was torn in a dilemma that couldn't be solved. Her selfishness was too big to ignore. Her yearning for Mina's love too great. She couldn't stay away, even when it would be the best for the both of them. So she kept coming back. Perhaps it was a big mistake. Perhaps it was the best choice of her life. She wasn't sure about that, and she would probably never be sure. Mina had been her life. Her time with Mina was the best in her whole life, and in the aftermaths of it. But to love someone so hard until you kill them... Her biggest fear had become reality.
Momo blamed herself. She would always blame herself for murdering Mina.

For the next few months, the killing rampede went on. It was easier to cope with her sadness through anger than to actually cry. Hundreds of innocents died at her hands, but Momo couldn't care less.
During the day, she spend her time at ambandoned houses, moving from spot to spot every now and then. She'd spend her days slumped against the wall, with her arms wrapped around her body while her sobs made her body shake. Mina's smile was burned on her ratina; she couldn't set it out of her mind. Tears would run over her cheeks.
When the night fell, she would emerge from her hiding spot. She'd walk back to the city. Sometimes she spend hours walking before she arrived, but it was a good way to stay occupied.
Once she came there, innocents fell to her anger. Converting her sadness in anger was easy. Killing someone was easy. Even though they hadn't done anything, and their screaming and pleading was agony to her ears - it reminded her of Mina... but everything reminded her of Mina nowadays - she still blamed them. She blamed everyone for Mina's death. Including herself. She hated herself more than anyone.
When the morning came, and another victim had fallen to the 'serie murderer of Tokyo' Momo would go to the graveyard where Mina's body rested. She'd sit by her tombstone until the sun had risen enough for her to be spotted by other people. She'd cry. Her tiredness would turn on her sadness and she'd cry again. Momo would touch the letters of Mina's name on the smooth rock, and wrap her arms around it, as if she was holding her. Her sobs ripped through her body and she cried until she couldn't cry anymore. Her tears wettened the still turned earth beneath her. The picture of Mina's body being eaten by worms and ants and other insects made her stomach turn. But she couldn't throw up anymore.

From the moment Mina had died, Momo hadn't fed herself anymore. She hoped that she could starve herself to death. Then she'd finally be lost from the everlasting agony that crippled through her body. She noted that she was being selfish again. But maybe, maybe then she'd able to meet Mina again. Did vampires also go to heaven? Momo was sure Mina would have gone to heaven, if there was one. She probably wouldn't go to heaven. But that was okay. To burn in hell for what she had done was okay too. At least then she'd be punished with pain, instead of this vicious melancholy that had invaded her body.
So she starved herself. She didn't drink one drop. And eventually, the wished effects started to kick in, even though it took way longer than she would've liked it to.
It took a month before her body started to feel weak-ish. Another three months before she wasn't able to walk anymore. From that moment she stayed day after day in the abandoned house, barely able to move her body. On good days she'd be able to walk around for half an hour, but afterwards she'd be too tired to even open her eyes.
It took another two months before her tears ran out. Crying had become to exhausting. Again two months passed before the hallicinations started. She couldn't distinguish the reality from the fantasy anymore. Mina was with her, then she was not. She held her, but suddenly vanished into thin air. Momo couldn't understand anymore what was happening, and kept longing and longing, which probably made her mourning even worse.

Mina's death anniversary started to come up again, but Momo was too weak to move. She only hoped that she'd die soon. Could vampires die? She hoped so.

At the night from the 15th to the 16th of January, a lifeless girl was found in a building that was about to be wrecked. The abandoned, empty houses would be replaced by brand a brand new factory. Momo had her eyes closed when the rescue workers came in. They shook her arm and body, asking her to wake up. Someone felt her pulse. She hadn't had a pulse for decennia. They called an ambulance, but she was already proclaimed dead before they arrived at the hospital. The annoying sound of the sirene still rang in her ears. It surpressed the dreams she had of Mina; it annoyed her.
Because her fingerprints didn't match anyone in the system, she was buried alone. In the same graveyard of Mina. Momo hadn't had any energy to oblige. She was as dead as they proclaimed her to be. So she was locked in a coffin, and lifted in a hole in the ground. The thuds of earth on her coffin drummed in her ears. She laid still, with her arms crossed over her body.
I have always loved you, don't forget that, Momo. Mina's voice sounded in her head, so clear and so pure that it almost was as if she was right next to her. The hallucinations had gotten worse, but they had never been this vivid. Maybe, because she was on the edge of death, she thought. She hoped she was at the edge of death, anyway.
Momo opened her eyes for the first time in months, but didn't see anything but darkness.
"I have always loved you too..."