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The wind blew softly as the sun set. He knew he didn't have long.
Heizou smiled down at Kazuha, whose head rested softly in his lap. The last thing Heizou wanted was for his lover's last memory of him to be one of sorrow. He leaned down and kissed his forehead, savouring the remaining warmth that seemed to be slipping away oh, so quickly.
Heizou's hands rested softly on either side of Kazuha's head, a soft, closed-eye smile sucked his expression dry of any true thoughts he might be having as his beloved boyfriend's warm, silent tears stained his fingertips. Kazuha didn't look at him. He didn't say anything. If he remembered correctly, he'd said everything he wanted to say. He didn't want to use any energy now.
Heizou's soft humming was what surprised Kazuha the most. An old song Kazuha would sing to Heizou when they were little. Kazuha wanted to kiss him again. Maybe if he'd waited a little longer, he would've gotten just one more.
The soft stillness of the earth beneath them dragged more weight onto Kazuha's shoulders than he thought it would. He'd always believed the release of death would be a calm one. A peaceful one. And it was, for some unknown reason.
It should've hurt more. The throbbing pain in his wrists was enough to justify that. The soft humming of his boyfriend above him, and the way he seemed so unmoved by the entire situation should have hurt too. But he lied comfortably in Heizou's lap like they always did, watching the sunset with that same, strange feeling of warmth in his chest, familiar to him by all means.
If the clock was ticking now, Kazuha couldn't tell. As the sun sank lower into the earth, he could feel himself do the same. The small piece of paper that had originally sent Heizou into a panicked frenzy tucked neatly away in his pocket, now. When he found him, Kazuha was standing. The last moment of eye contact had been then, when Kazuha was still even able to stand.
Heizou's eyes seemed not to open since. Not that Kazuha could see, but he could always feel the detective's eyes on him. Pretty soft green like the forests they once played in as children, muted yet warm enough that Kazuha could fall into them and never find a reason to crawl out.
Kazuha twitched slightly in Heizou's lap, his expression warm and full of regret. Those hands, warm, ran through Kazuha's platinum hair, disheveled and messy. His hands moved down to Kazuha's shoulders. Finally, his eyes opened, and he smiled down at his lover, tucking a strand of blonde hair out of his face. Kazuha felt his heart quicken for just a moment.
Heizou pressed his lips to Kazuha's forehead. Kazuha's heart slowed again. Heizou's hand found the pulse of Kazuha's neck. He counted the seconds.
One, two.
One, two, three.
One, two, three four...
Heizou's eyes were closed as he listened to the last sounds of his lover's breath.
***
"Are you angry at me?" Kazuha asked. Heizou turned to look at him.
"What? Why would I be angry?" Heizou sat the bowl of rice down in front of Kazuha. Kazuha poked at it with his chopsticks. "You should eat. You're tired. You need energy if you're gonna argue." Heizou joked.
"I yelled. I was mean and rude and-"
"Kazuha." Heizou interrupted. Kazuha looked up, startled. Heizou was sitting across from him, smiling. "If I forgive you, will you eat? Cuz I do." Heizou closed his eyes. "You know I could never stay mad at you." Kazuha blushed. "Eat your food while it's still warm. Then we can go to bed." Kazuha fidgeted with his chopsticks.
"Zuzu?" Kazuha looked up again. "Let's go to the movies tomorrow." Heizou's smile was too sweet to resist. Kazuha forced a smile.
"Sure."
***
I guess we'll just have to go see that movie another time. Kazuha thought, as if he was unaware that he himself, was dying. Neither of them had spoken since Heizou had found him. The note in the detective's pocket was crinkled up and ripped from how hard he had grabbed it in his panicked state, but he knew after he found Kazuha that he should have done things different a long time ago. He knew that if he hadn't messed up back then, he and Kazuha would be living together for years and years and years and...
But he let him go. Trying to save him now would only cause him more suffering.
"My beloved Heizou.
i'm tired
that's all i can seem to be anymore
even the wind doesn't reach me
like it used to
i kept trying
but it never stayed
not the strength
not the reasons
only you
and even that wasn't enough
to make me stay
i'm sorry
-kazuha"
The wind seemed to slow, now. Heizou stared at a tree in the distance. There was a leaf, seemingly clinging on to its branch, but it looked ready to fall. Gods, how he hated the stupid poeticism that Kazuha had plagued him with. He had to close his eyes and hold back a laugh.
Everything was quiet. So when Heizou heard the far away 'snap' of the leaf, barely audible to any normal person, he didn't have to open his eyes to know. The wind stilled. He opened his eyes, staring straight ahead at the sunset, at it's peak. It covered the skies in a beautiful, vibrant pink and orange... Red and yellow that warmed him. He smiled.
"...The sunset is beautiful, huh, Kazuha?"