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“We’re best friends, right?”
“..Right?”
.
.
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Zane coughed, his body heaving forward to try and eject the smoke from his lungs. The entire side of his body feels like it’s on fire, through the dust and smoke he can see the flames and it just might be on fire for real. He stared at it like it was a million miles away, his eyes locking on Simon. The force of the blast had knocked the other man back a few yards.
Zane yelled,
“You Idiot!”
But it came out more of a desperate gasp for air, he couldn’t move his body right, blood was dripping down his face. He knew because it was getting in his eye and obscuring his vision. He couldn’t tell how bad it was, as he can’t see the other side, the other eye doesn’t work anymore.
“..Simon! I swear- if you die on me-! I-I’ll, I’ll kill you!”
The sand beneath his boots barely moved, even as Zane used all his strength to try and order his legs forward. Falling forward again he broke out into another coughing fit.
Zane’s vision blurred, falling face down into the sand. His mind gave out, and he went unconscious.
“...Simon..”
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.
.
Zane rolled over onto his side, he threw up onto the sand. His head is pounding and he’s overheating. The sun beating down onto him. The smoke has cleared and everything is quiet. Though his ears are still ringing.
Zane tried to get up, only to be stopped by waves of pain. He made a choked sob, looking down at his arm and leg, the skin was singed, rippled and bubbled up. The burns ached heavily, and the sand covering his body wasn’t helping the situation. Zane’s mind was flooded by what happened before he passed out.
“...Simon-!”
Tears flooded his right eye, the other one, the scarred one, unable to cry. His breathing uneven as he pushed himself forward. Seeing Simon’s body through a pinhole tunnel vision.
Like he was the only thing that mattered.
Zane knew that had always been true.
He collapsed beside Simon. His face pressing into his blood soaked vest, tears wetting the dried blood. He looked over the body of the sole reason he made it through his father’s abuse.
“Oh… f-fuck.. …Simon.. Why w-would you do this… to me…”
Zane clenched his fist of his unburned hand. How could his friend be as stupid as to join the military?
He should’ve been there for him.
Simon didn’t deserve this.
Zane did, It should be Zane laying on the battlefield, shot dead.
Zane’s breathing broke out into an ugly sob of anguish. His hands clenching to the fabrics of Simon’s uniform. His face pressed into his bestfriend’s chest.
Best friend, huh
Not really, Zane didn’t feel that way.
He didn’t want to be Simon's best friend.
Was that all he would ever be to him?
Zane held Simon’s hand, “I’m sorry, I-I’m so sorry… I love you… Simon… ..I-... I don’t think I can do this… Knowing you’re not here anymore…”
Zane sobbed, holding Simon’s hand to his cheek. It felt like his world was ending, reduced to this stupid desert, and this stupid war. What was he even fighting for if it wasn’t Simon…
His hands are throbbing. Really, Something must be really wrong with him. It’s like his hands are throbbing at a different pace than his heart.
He must be dying.
His eyes opened again, looking down at Simon’s body. His hand clenched tighter around Simon’s wrist. His eyes looked to the other man’s wrist.
That’s-
Fuck
Zane pressed his ear to Simon’s chest, trying to settle his sobbing enough to listen, but it was a losing battle. There-
A heartbeat.
It’s fast, really fast, and kinda irregular, but it’s there.
Zane made a strangled noise of pure shock. Not quite relief. He looked up at Simon’s face through blurry vision, Simon’s skin was clammy and shined with a thin layer of sweat. He followed the blood to the gunshot wound on Simon’s shoulder, it’s matted with sand, fabric and blood, but that must’ve stopped the bleeding.
Simon cried harder.
It’s not like he could save him.
The bacon empire would never help the other side, and the Robloxia army would probably kill zane on the spot for coming near their camp.
But maybe if that’s was it would take to-
He has to.
Where are they?
Zane’s memory is fuzzy. He hasn’t felt normal since he and Simon last saw each other, since then, time has just passed. Without making much of an impression on zane.
Despite the pain wracking through his body, he lifted Simon to his chest.
His knees almost buckled as he tried to walk.
Zane’s vision blurred. The pain was almost unbearable.
For him.
Do this, for him.
For Simon.
He started moving as fast as he could, one weak, unbalanced step at a time, he strained towards the Robloxia army camp. The sun was setting, but he didn’t care. He dragged his feet through the sand like he was glued to the floor. He paused to catch his breath, burying his face in Simon’s chest.
For him.
He continued on.
Zane saw the medic tent, he nearly collapsed trying to push the cloth open, and he heard crashing. A brown haired woman had pushed a brown haired man off the table and into a rack of supplies. The man’s face was disoriented from the fall but overall flushed, just like the woman’s shocked expression, cheeks tinged pink.
Before her expression dropped.
“Who the hell are you?! Holy crap!”
She grabbed a gun off the shelf.
Zane didn’t move.
“Please, help him… Y-you.. Have to save him… Then shoot me, or anything… just- please..”
The brown haired man pulled himself back onto his feet.
“Zane? Is that you? Is that-?”
Zane’s eye focused just enough to make out the fact that the man who was speaking was Matt…
He looked the same, albeit much older than when they last saw each other.
“Yeah.. it’s Simon…”
Tears flooded Zane's eye again. He nearly collapsed before the brown haired woman got Simon from his arms and onto a table. Matt helped Zane onto another. Zane kept his head turned to watch Simon.
“I’ll be honest, it’s not looking good for him, Matt. The fact he’s still alive is pure chance, if the infection is resistant to any of the antibiotics I've got…”
She tossed a small sponge.
“Well, you're gonna help?”
Matt glanced between her and Zane, she came over with a syringe and injected spots of Zane’s arms and chest and leg, where the burn covers. The injection numbed the pain quite a bit.
But Zane couldn’t focus on anything but Simon.
The woman walked back to him, pulling on some gloves and tools, he leaned over Simon, putting in IV for fluids and antibiotics. Zane was so focused on Simon that it wasn’t until he felt the searing pain of Matt using the sponge to clean his burns, that ripped his focus from him. Zane cried out and grit his teeth. Matt looked disgusted by the process.
.
Matt gagged, and Zane fell unconscious.
Zane’s eyes opened, he feels dizzy, and tired, despite having been unconscious. He sat up abruptly, immediately regretting it, the bandages on his side pulled at the raw burnt flesh beneath. He made a sharp gasp of pain.
Zane looked around, before turning, Simon was on a mat next to him, they were both in a different tent than he remembered. He shifted, reaching out to hold Simon's hand, feeling his pulse. He sighed, the pain creeping into his wounds.
He put his head up. Matt was sitting on a table, the brown haired woman was changing a bandage on the edge of his ribs.
“Ow- gah! Molly-! Can't you be gentle?”
Matt clenched his jaw.
“Well, if you stopped ripping your stitches, and were a good boy, maybe I'd consider it.”
She pulled a stitch out before resetting the wound. Matt bit his fist from the pain.
.
“Is he okay..?”
Zane’s voice was broken and rough, he really needed water or something. Both Matt and Molly turned to Zane.
“Well, I wouldn’t say okay, He has an infection and he lost a lot of blood.”
Molly walked over.
“But y’know, He’s still kicking.”
Zane looked back at Simon, his breath shook. His hand tightened around Simon’s.
“Is he… going to.. Wake up?”
He closed his eyes, Zane had never felt such fear over such a simple answer. Molly looked at Matt.
“Well, He’s sedated, He’ll probably remain sedated until his vitals stabilize, and he starts doing better, or until we can get him out of here.”
Zane rubbed his eyes, his heart ached in his chest.
“I- uh, what’s going to happen to me? Are you going to kill me?”
Zane felt selfish asking, but he wanted to stay with Simon. He almost lost him, and being apart from him was the last thing he wanted at the moment, or ever.
“Oh? What?- No- No.”
Matt put his hands up.
“We’ve already disarmed you, and I took an oath as a doctor to do no harm.”
Molly got up, Matt followed her.
“I already radio’d the sergeant, We’ll take you off the field and to holding when you’re healed a bit,”
Zane got nervous, he’s never been captured. The Bacon empire doesn’t teach them to take prisoners…
Zane couldn't bring himself to focus on what Matt and Molly said to him after that. His mind felt tired. All he could do was wonder if Simon was going to be okay.
“I- uh.. how was he doing… you know.. before a few days ago..?”
Matt sighed.
“I never really got the chance to catch up with him. But, I think he and Guest made up, which honestly, I didn't think Guest would ever forgive him.”
Matt shrugged, he hadn't been there but Guest seemed different after they had talked. It was strange, truly strange.
Zane bit his lip.
“Do you think Simon will ever forgive me?”
He looked at the ground, slowly running his not burned fingers through the dust. Zane wouldn't expect Simon to.
.
“Simon.. he's- He's different. Guest told me, he changed a lot.”
Matt looked out at the battlefield as he spoke. He sighed and rubbed his bandages. They didn't find Guest's body, but Matt knew Guest had died a hero.
“Gosh.. I-I.. I really wish Guest were here to tell you.. he was really the last person to speak to Simon…”
Zane looked down at Simon, knowing about the casualties of war made his chest ache in a way he wasn't prepared for. Simon wasn't out of the woods on recovery, not even close. But knowing that he could very well have died in an instant with no hope, made Zane nauseous.
He pulled Simon's hand to his chest and leaned back against the wall. Zane sighed, it did nothing to relieve the horrible weight he felt on his chest. Years of stress and sorrow building up within his heart and mind, it pulled on it heavily knowing he could be losing the only person that makes his life mean anything.
Even if he lost sight of that path for a long time…
.
Zane let out a shaking breath.
This terror was unmatched by anything, even as much as he feared his father. This was different. It was cold, and deep in his chest. The fear of being weak that his father instilled in him was fiery and it burned through him and left him feeling like ashes of himself.
Zane shook his head. Tears running down his unburned cheek.
Matt and Molly took this as their chance to leave.
Zane lowered his head, inhaling the scent of gunpowder, sand, and blood that radiated off of Simon. He pressed his cheek into the palm of his hand as his tears soaked down his cheeks.
He missed him.
He missed Simon.
Zane had been so focused on surviving his own life, that he'd strayed from the only things that made him human. None of this mattered but Simon…
His father didn't matter..
Zane would never let anything that man could do interfere with his love again.
.
.
.
The days that passed were beyond Zane's care.
Molly came in to change bandages, on both Simon and Zane.
Zane fell asleep to the sounds of explosions and gunfire. He held onto Simon tightly during those nights.
Zane sat up one morning, something was wrong.
It was quiet.
“O-oh- fuck-”
Zane’s head snapped to Simon. Who rolled over onto his side, whimpering softly in pain.
He was awake.
Awake-
Simon-
Simon was awake.
Zane threw himself at him. Only realizing what he'd done when Simon dug his nails into his shoulder, to which Zane panicked.
Simon was supposed to be sedated, why it had worn off wasn't really something Zane was trained to answer.
But that probably meant he'd been given no pain medication.
Zane pulled back a little.
“Simon-!”
“...Z-Zane..?
Simon's gaze followed the bandages covering Zane's entire left side from face down…
His eyes changed from an expression of confusion to one of realization. Of remembrance.
“The grenade…”
Simon's voice cracked.
“I don't care-!”
Zane buried his face in Simon's neck. He'd been praying to anything and everything these past weeks. Prayers that had been answered.
One of the grenade explosions seemed closer than normal.
Zane was knocked to the side by the end of a gun.
“Failure. Getting captured by these useless robloxians? You should've died with honor to the empire, don't you have any dignity?”
It was one of Zane's superiors. He kicked Zane in the stomach before setting his sights on Simon. He laughed.
“For this? Really? You would bring shame to your family, to your people? For him?”
He laughed, grabbing his gun. Simon was unable to run, hide, or defend himself. Zane snapped at how helpless he looked, and threw himself at his own commander.
He had been stripped of all his weapons when he'd been captured. And his left arm is out of commission. But his right works fine enough to slam into the face of the man in front of him.
Nothing would get in his way.
Nothing.
No stupid army.
No stupid war.
No stupid hatred for a group of people who'd never personally done anything wrong.
Simon was innocent, Simon was a good man.
He'd been troubled, but Zane knew for a fact he'd done nothing to deserve this.
Zane didn't realize he'd been speaking out loud until he looked up from his commander's bloodied face. His ears were ringing again but this time with pure rage. He caught Simon's expression.
His eyes were wide, some mix between fearful of Zane, and gratitude for Zane saving him.
Simon looked down, his cheeks a soft pink.
Yeah, that's just the fever.
Simon doesn't have a fever anymore.
Zane glanced at Simon before back at his commander. He kicked the downed man in the chest. Zane clenched his jaw.
He huffed, nobody would get near Simon again, not if he had anything to say about it.
Even if it scared Simon.
.
.
.
Simon was anything but scared. Well not quite. Being ambushed where he couldn't move to save his own life was terrifying.
Watching Zane beat the life out of the man who threatened him, just because he threatened him.
One of Zane’s own.
Simon's heart was pounding harder than when his life had been at stake. Had Zane always been that way when he was fighting?
Suddenly Simon regretted not watching him constantly when they were bullying kids together in grade school…
No.
That would've made Zane hate him, what was he thinking?
“Are you okay?..”
Simon spoke while staring down at the body. Zane looked back at Simon.
“Yeah.. I-I think I am.”
Zane moved back over to Simon. His body slumped against him.
“You're alive…”
Simon heard Zane's words and realized how scared the other man had to have been. Zane never acted like this, he's the one who went to kill Simon. They're enemies now.
Yet Zane was holding his hand, and leaning on him like some kind of sad puppy.
“How bad is… y’know.. your wounds?”
Simon asked hesitantly. Zane exhaled deeply.
“The blast burned me real bad, and your medic was pulling shrapnel out of it for hours.”
Zane looked up at Simon's face then back at the wall.
“It's not like I lost much though, haven't been able to see from that eye since the first scar, and I'm used to being stared at for scars.”
Simon's hand shook as he reached up and cupped his hand over the bandages. Zane leaned closer.
“I like your face-”
Simon blurted out awkwardly. Both of their faces burned red, Simon turned his face away, and Zane leaned back. Zane’s eyes looked at Simon’s lips, as the other man mumbled something like an apology. Simon looked back up at Zane, and Zane almost strained his neck looking away so fast.
“But- that makes sense right? I mean, I like your face, but not in a weird way man-”
“Yeah- Y-Yeah, I got it.”
Zane had not been listening, how could he?
Simon had been so close to him just a moment ago.
“H-Hey? Simon? Would it be weird if I-I like-”
“Oh- Shit!”
Matt walked into the tent, seeing the body on the floor. Molly was close behind, She took one look at the lifeless commander on the floor.
“Yeah, he's gone.”
She knelt down and felt his pulse to be sure, Before Matt tried to drag the body out of the tent, Molly slapped his hands away.
“Not with your injuries you’re not.”
Molly threw the body over her shoulder and walked out of the tent. Matt huffed and saw Zane and Simon staring at him, His cheeks flushed with embarrassment.
“W-What are you both looking at?!”
He tried to puff up his chest, but winced at the movement of the wound on his shoulder.
.
Zane and Simon looked at Matt and then each other. They both laughed, weakly because of their injuries. They made their chests hurt laughing.
“Dude- You haven’t changed since elementary-”
“You’re so bad at acting tough, man-”
Simon laughed, clutching his stomach. While Zane was staring at Simon. Matt’s face burned red and he left the tent, kicking some dust up as he pushed the tent flap open. Zane and Simon looked at each other and laughed harder. Somewhere between the looming threat of death, and the memories of their youth made the situation really humorous to them.
They laid next to each other on the floor.
Simon stared at the way the light flowed in the openings of the tent, his eyes following the dust as it settled down. He turned to Zane, but kept his eyes focused on the light.
“You know, when I pulled the pin on the grenade, it blew me unconscious. I had this really weird dream.”
Zane turned to face Simon. Zane had also had a strange dream, though it had felt more real than anything.
“Like the kind of thing that felt like my last moments.”
Simon said softly, turning to stare at the ceiling. He laughed softly, more anxious than anything else.
“It felt like dying, but it was us, when we were kids…”
Zane perked his head up, that was weird. Their dreams were very similar.
“Yeah, That’s kinda what happened for me. That's why I got up again.”
‘I couldn’t die without holding you one last time.’
Zane didn’t say the last part aloud. He didn’t comment on being the one to have shot Simon either. Simon looked at Zane.
“Why did you save me? You betrayed your side, your people..”
Zane stared at Simon.
“You are my side. I just… I lost sight of that I guess.”
Simon made a soft huff, his eyes watery.
“You really were the only person who was ever on my side.”
Simon and Zane stared at each other. Zane reached out at the same time as Simon, their hands meeting in the middle.
Neither of them broke eye contact, or said anything.
Simon leaned towards Zane and kissed him. Zane moved his other hand to pull Simon closer to him.
When Simon pulled away, Zane stared at him.
“We’re not best friends, are we..?”
Simon flicked him in the forehead.
“Why can’t we be both?”