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my tongue was burnt to a crisp (i hope it won't be tomorrow)

Summary:

5 times everyone tried to test qifrey's spice tolerance, the 1 time he admitted it

requested!!

title from my bread was burnt to a crisp

Notes:

i maybe screwed up the 5+1 but its the thought that counts...?

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: coco

Chapter Text

1. 

 

It’s a nice day in the Naakiwan Downs, Qifrey thinks as he looks out the window of his atelier. Maybe he’ll take the girls shopping, they could cook together, and they can enjoy a nice picnic outside. He has noticed that Agott’s been working herself to the bone lately, despite the others desperately trying to snap her out of it.

 

For now, he stretches and pads down to the kitchen as quietly as he can. He passes Olruggio’s door and takes a small peek inside. He’s asleep, much to Qifrey’s relief. He closes the door gently and continues on his way. Qifrey likes the calm of the mornings before anyone wakes. It gives him time to think and plan out his day. With four lively apprentices, there’s never a moment to spare for him. It’s not that he doesn’t like it, but it does get to be a bit much.

 

He checks the bin, adjusting his spectacles, and makes a mental note. They’re close to running out of horncaps and carapace yams. He remembers that Coco had so much fun cooking those yams a few nights ago, he muses, and how the children were all so excited to eat it. Qifrey lets out a small chuckle before closing the bin. For today, he can attempt to replicate a delicacy from the outside world. Maybe it’ll ease Coco’s transition a little.

 

He’s busy cooking up the crepes with a pyreball when he hears the signature soft thumping from upstairs. The girls are definitely up by now, he thinks, and they’ll come rushing down in no time. For now, he simply continues to cook. 

 

“Master Qifrey!” Coco calls as she rushes downstairs.

“Richeh smells something good,” the blue-haired girl adds.

“Are those crepes?” Agott asks quizzically. “You’ve never made those before.”

“Ooh, ooh, let me see!” Tetia shouts, worming through the crowd. “Hey, they’re so pretty!”

Qifrey chuckles. “Well, they’re quite simple to make and bake! Would any of you girls like to try making one?”

 

Coco immediately steps up to the challenge. Qifrey knew she would. She’s quite skilled with the crepes and it makes the other girls gasp in awe. 

 

“Coco, how are you this good at it!” Tetia exclaims. 

“W-well,” she smiles bashfully. “My mother used to make these with me.”

“I see,” Agott says briskly. “Are we just supposed to eat them dry?”

“No, dear,” Qifrey laughs. “I’ve set out the ham and cheese. All that’s left is to make the eggs. Coco, would you like to stay and help me? Could the rest of you three set the table?”

“Yes, Master Qifrey!” Tetia shouts before she dashes out.

 

Agott and Richeh follow more slowly, already pulling out their palmquires and pens. Coco glimpses Agott flipping to a page to reveal a beautiful seal with the circle incomplete. She figures it would help them with the table or something. She turns to the man standing behind her, watching the girls with a gentle expression. 

 

“Master, what’s that spell Agott’s using?” she asks.

“That’s just a simple levitation spell! It’ll float the plates up and set them,” he answers quickly. “I can show you how to draw one later! For now, I’d like you to season and finish cooking the eggs. Salt, pepper, a bit of chili flakes, and sesame. You know how to, right?”

“Yes!” She smiles brightly, rushing to look for spices.

 

Qifrey turns back to the crepes, humming absently to himself. Maybe he should try to lure Olruggio out today, so that the entire atelier can go out for groceries. How would I do that? Maybe I can send Agott with a new spell to show him, he muses as he flips a crepe. Maybe I can just call him. It’s been far too long since I’ve seen him. Is he still stuck on that commission? Perhaps I could–

 

“M-master Qifrey?” Coco’s timid voice shakes him out of his thoughts.

He fixes a kind expression before he turns around. “Yes, Coco?”

“I may have added too much of the chili flakes…”

 

Qifrey takes a peek at the eggs. There’s almost three chili flakes per scrambled egg, and Coco looks to be the same shade as the flakes. The situation would be almost comical, if it weren’t for Coco’s mortified expression and the fact that the girls might go without eggs.

 

“Well, let’s see if anyone will eat them. It could be a good test of courage! If nobody does, we can simply shelve them for later,” Qifrey says gently. “I’ll teach you how to use the shakers properly, they do have a tiny bit of magic. I’m sorry for not saying so earlier, Coco.”

She shakes her head furiously. “No, it’s alright! I’m sure it’ll be okay. I’m quite curious to see their spice tolerances myself,” she adds sheepishly. “Thank you, Master Qifrey!”

 

He flips the last crepe onto the stack, just in time as the pyreball runs out. He grabs the plate of crepes with one hand, a plate of ham and cheese in the other, and smiles at Coco.

 

“Grab your eggs, please. Let’s serve breakfast!” 

 

The two deposit the plates on the table. Agott, Richeh, and Tetia share the same expression.

 

“Are these safe to eat?” Tetia near-whispers.

“Well, Coco may have gone a bit overboard. Nothing to worry about, I’m sure it’s alright. Let’s all have a little test of courage this morning, shall we?” Qifrey claps his hands. “I’ll just grab Olly and we can get started.”

“Get who? Your little stable woke me just fine,” the man grumbled from the doorway. 

 

Coco slipped into the seat next to Agott as Olruggio slumped into another. Qifrey suppressed a laugh and sat down by him, helping everybody to a little bit of the eggs.

 

“Well then, shall we?” 

 

Coco takes a small peek out at everyone before she takes a bite. Immediately, she’s assaulted by the feeling of fire spreading across her mouth. 

 

Nobody else is spared, she notices as she fans her mouth. Agott’s face is screwed up and red, Tetia is gasping for air, and Richeh purses her lips and fans her face. Not even Master Olly looks like he’ll survive this, she thinks with despair, he works with fire and mastered it so well he looks like he’ll spit out flames right now.

 

But when Coco takes a look at her professor, her eyes widen in disbelief.

 

“Master Qifrey?” she blurts out. “What are you doing?!”

“It’s quite nice, Coco,” he hums. “I like it actually. You did a good job in seasoning, hm?”

“Y-you don’t have to force yourself!” she insists. “I know it’s undeniably spicy! Even Master Olly can’t handle it!”

“Well, Olly has never had a very good spice tolerance,” Qifrey chuckles. “Anyways, if you’re all tapping out, I can eat the eggs. You all can just enjoy the crepes.”

 

Coco stares, baffled, at Qifrey’s happy expression as he continues to chew. There’s no way! After all, she didn’t know there were seals on the shakers, so there’s no way they’d be properly seasoned! Richeh, the one with the best tolerance of any flavor, couldn’t even handle it! Coco’s determined to figure out the mystery behind Master Qifrey.

 

After breakfast is finished, Qifrey stands up and addresses the group while he still has them.

 

“Well, we’re running out of groceries, and I was hoping the whole atelier could come with me. It would be nice, no?” he asked.

“Guess so,” Olruggio muttered. “Haven’t seen the sky in days, that’s for sure.”

“Can we!” Tetia gasped. “Please!”

“Alright, alright. Let’s meet back down here in, say, half a clock mark? That’ll give us all enough time to be prepared. I might need a bit to seal up the food, too.”

 

The girls immediately dash off, giggling, leaving behind their professor and watchful eye to do the magic work. Coco in particular shuts the door quickly and spins around to face Agott once they return to their room.

 

“Agott!” she shouts. “Did Master Qifrey always have such a good tolerance?”

“I don’t know,” Agott replies coolly as she fixes her hat. “He’s never really cooked spicy food on lots of occasions. After what went down at breakfast, I suppose he does.”

“I’m calling a meeting here!” Coco declares. “I’ll grab the others now!”

 

She spins and runs down the hallway, bursting into Richeh and Tetia’s room.

 

“Meeting! In my room! Now!” 

 

Then she’s gone, running back to Agott. I’ll definitely see this through! Maybe Master Olly will help us, she thinks. We’ll figure this out together!

 

She bursts back in, Richeh and Tetia following cautiously after. Agott is seated at her desk like always while the other three flop onto Coco’s bed. Agott grimaces at the thought of the bedsheets getting dirty but chooses to not say anything.

 

“Well, Coco, what’s the idea?”

“I wanna test Master Qifrey!” she whispers. “Let’s see how much spice he can really take!”

“Is that why you poisoned us?” Agott deadpans. 

“No!” she waves her hands frantically. “I promise! I just didn’t know there were seals, I thought they were normal shakers! I suppose I overseasoned everything though…”

“Richeh agrees with Agott,” she pipes up. “But Richeh also agrees with Coco. I’m curious about Master Qifrey’s spice tolerance.”

“Ooh, ooh! Let’s get Master Olly in on this!” Tetia chimes in. “If he can cook with us, then we can carry out this operation in secret!”

“Then we have to talk to him before we buy groceries,” Agott sighs. “Here’s the plan. We talk to him now, buy what we need, and tell Master Qifrey we want to cook dinner for the week. If we want to test his tolerance, we can gradually increase the amount. That way it’s controlled and if he finds one dish too spicy, we know the range.”

“Way to snag it, Agott!” Coco’s eyes are sparkling. Agott feels her face grow hot. “Let’s get Master Olly now, then!”

 

The girls creep downstairs, pushing Agott into view from the living room. Her face is still a bit red as she stares down Qifrey and Olruggio in the kitchen.

 

“M-Master Olly,” she begins. “I have a new spell I’d like to show you. Could you come with me?”

“Not your master,” he groans automatically, but immediately brightens up. “A new spell? That’s somethin’. I’ll come right away.”

 

Once Olruggio is safely upstairs and shut into a room with the four girls, he realizes exactly what he is dragged into.

 

“We’re sorry for lying, Master Olly!” Coco cries. “But we do need your help!”

“We wanna test Master Qifrey’s spice tolerance!” Tetia adds. “Agott came up with a plan and everything! But we need you to help us!”

“We want to slowly increase the spice amount on Master Qifrey’s food,” Agott says. “But we can’t have him knowing. So we need you to agree to watch us so that he doesn’t. We’re going to buy all our supplies today, so we want to ask you to help us do that too so Master Qifrey doesn’t find out.”

“Richeh agrees.”

Olruggio runs a hand through his hair. “Well, thought it out, huh? Can’t say I’m not curious myself. Fine, you’re lucky. I’ll help out. What are you gonna grab?”

“Great!” Coco smiles. “Thank you, Master Olly!”

“For the record, I do have a spell to show–”

“Agott, not the time!” Tetia interrupts. “We’re gonna get back at Master Qifrey!”

 

Agott and Olruggio let out a sigh at the same time as the other three high five each other, eyes sparkling with delight. Their little celebration is only interrupted by Qifrey calling for them. The four girls dash out of the room together, hand in hand and giggling. Olruggio yells to slow down, but they don’t listen. 

 

As Coco runs with them, she thinks for once that she’s grateful she didn’t know the magic seals on the shakers. If it makes everyone, even Agott, smile like this, it’s worth every horrible pepper flake I ate at breakfast today!