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Language:
English
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Published:
2017-02-24
Updated:
2017-05-17
Words:
23,612
Chapters:
40/104
Comments:
23
Kudos:
18
Hits:
679

Mission From God: The Trilogy

Summary:

Sara is just your average everyday normal girl — she's modest, Christian, conservative, and loves to play video games. One day, God beckons Sara to save the vast world of Nintendo. Now with their world at stake, Sara must combat against the forces Satan, liberals and Barack Obama. Prior to her own knowledge, there is much more than she bargained for.

The transcribing of PrincessAmerica's Mishonh From God into English. Let's be real here, nothing will ever beat the original. :P

Notes:

I can't believe I'm even doing this and what's even more fascinating is that this story came to be when I was only eleven and in fifth grade at the time. A thought came to me one time and I figured why not try to transcribe a majestic trollfic into something at least more fluid so in retrospect, I've chose the Mission From God trilogy. I'm going to confess, as weird as this is going to sound, I love this trollfic. As it is evident with the title, I am most likely going combine all three parts because why the hell not.

Anyways, the only reason why I'm doing this is because I'm sure some people wanted to glance at how controversial it was however couldn't get past the on purpose spelling, grammatical and sentence structures. I know I'm highly wasting my time doing what's considered a dead horse but hey, I've always wanted to transcribe a actual trollfic into something more legible for the longest time now.

To explain, unless people have read the TVTropes page and or The Ethical Adventures of Gamergate!, it is obvious that this was a trollfic from the start. The author goes to explain that their trollfics are pretty much a satire of conservatives (her words, not mine).

Resuming on, I will be transcribing Sara's authors notes as well. Note that when I mean by transcribing, I might change up a few sentences if the original is worded very oddly and add additional words and phrases.

Disclaimer: Mishonh from God is owned by PrincessAmerica, I'm just transcribing it into English.

Note: Hi! My name's Sara (not Palin unfortunately) and I'm a thirteen year old girl who loves God, America and the Constitution. Liberal socialists who like Barack Obama can LEAVE NOW and go back to getting welfare for nothing, ruining my beloved country and trying to turn everyone into gay atheists. Also I like video games like Super Smash Bros and otters even though I'm a girl (my mom said I would turn into a lesbian if I play too much video games however, I've put up pictures of Jacob from Twilight and Justin Bieber in my room so I don't).

Chapter 1: Mission from God

Chapter Text

CHAP 1: MISSION FROM GOD

I was inside my science class one day when my liberal teacher Mr. Johnson was talking about evilusion.

"And that's why humans derive from monkeys and there is no God," he said.

I raised my hand.

"Yes Sara," he said.

"If humans came from monkeys, then why are there still monkeys?"

My teacher had no answer for that so in turn, he gave me a detention and an F on my test.

"Hahaha!" he said, "you Christians will be defeated one day! Us atheists already rule this country because of Obamacare and soon all Christians will go to death panels!"

Just then the door to the science room opened and God walked in. He was wearing a robe and had a beard like he always does.

"Mr. Johnson, you're going to HELL!"

"No because you aren't real," Mr. Johnson said.

"Lol, you're a moron," God said and he struck Mr. Johnson with lightning and Mr. Johnson died.

"Yay!" said all of the Christians in the class.

"Boo!" said the heathens so God struck all of them too.

"Okay, now I need to talk to Sara," God said, "so everybody else, leave."

"Okay." My classmates left the room.

"Sara Osborne I've been watching you for some time," he said, "this world isn't the only one I made."

"For real?" I asked.

"Yeah, do you know about video games?"

"Yeah, I play them with my bro and Lauren!" (My bro is my brother and Lauren is my BFF (best friend forever) and she's a PCC (Pretty Conservative Christian) like me too)

"Well, they are real because when you play the other universe I've made."

"Cool God!" I high-fived God.

"Okay, but there's trouble. Satan found out about this and now he's in Nintendo World. Only you can stop him before he does evil stuff there."

"Oh no."

"Right, this is the hardest thing you ever done. Even harder than your math test last month. Good thing I'm God and I can give you cool powers and stuff."

So God gave me some power and I fell asleep. When I woke up, I was outside of the Smash Mansion.