Chapter Text
It's Friday afternoon, a week after Jisung's meeting with Hyunjin's friends and he and Hyunjin have agreed that morning that the latter would be picking up Jisung from his campus. Hyunjin had free time for the rest of the day and he's feeling happy and generous so they also planned to eat chicken that night.
Now at the campus gate Hyunjin stands, waiting, when a couple approaches him.
They're uncertain in their movements, but go to him anyway.
“You don’t go to this school, can we help you?”
“Sorry, I’m just waiting for someone," he replies politely, "Do you, by chance, know a Han Jisung?”
The shyness disappear and the couple suppresses their laughter, “Are you his new fling now?”
Taken aback, Hyunjin chokes on his own spit, “Excuse me, fling?” He awkwardly laughs to ease the tension but he cannot deny he's growing uncomfortable.
“You are, aren’t you?” The couple looks at each other then walks away before Hyunjin can even say anything else.
“How long do you think Jisung will keep him?”
“Dunno, maybe a few weeks max. The guy can’t keep a partner for even a month.” The couple cackles at their own joke.
Hyunjin looks back at them, wildly confused at the exchange.
“Don’t mind them, people can be very mean, sometimes.” A new voice, a loud one at that, catches his attention. The figure of the retreating couple also hears this and they roll their eyes at the source of the voice, at a man around Hyunjin's age. The latter also rolls his eyes at them then flips them off.
Said boy pockets his phone and stands up from the bench he was sitting on and walks toward Hyunjin.
“You’re looking for Jisung? I saw him cleaning up but I’m sure he won’t be too long.” The boy informs him.
“Oh, I guess I still have to wait for him some more. By the way,” He looks back at the couple who, by now, are getting in a taxi, “What’s the deal with them?” He gestures back at them to further emphasize.
Thoughtfulness washes over the boy's features.
“How do I say this,” the guy ponders for a moment, then continues, “It’s not a secret that Jisung’s a very... active person. He’s handsome, skilled in a lot of fields, and many people admire him for that.” The guy explains.
“A lot of students here on campus admire him very much to the point that people would ask him out for dates. Sometimes he asks them out but you get the point,” the person gestures wildly, “Anyway, because of that, there’s been hate towards him. You know how people can get.” the person jokes.
“Ah.” is the only thing Hyunjin can reply.
“What’s your name anyway? And what is your relationship with Jisung?” the person asks.
Immediately, Hyunjin outstretches his arm for a handshake, “I’m Hwang Hyunjin, his roommate. Friend. Roommate-friend.”
The person giggles, accepting his handshake, “Kim Seungmin, Jisung and I are in the same year.”
“I’m sure you know by now that Jisung’s a very nice person. I hope those guys don’t ruin his image for you.”
Hyunjin lets the words sink in for a moment, before responding. “Of course, Jisung's one of the best people I’ve met.” He says this with great sincerity, surprising himself a bit.
Kim Seungmin shifts his eyes to look at his watch. The former smiles at Hyunjin and bids his farewell. “Gotta go now, have a great day.” He waves his goodbye and Hyunjin does the same.
Hyunjin takes a seat on one of the benches and continues to wait for Jisung.
-
Surrounding the crispy fried chicken, cold beer and chill music are two hungry boys wolfing the food down.
It's a peaceful evening with nothing but good food, good music and good company but Hyunjin still has the encounter with the couple at Jisung’s school reverberating in his head, so the music becomes white noise to him.
If Jisung’s talking to him (he’s not, just happily munching on a chicken wing), then he’s not listening.
He has half the mind to confront Jisung about it because he’s genuinely troubled about it- people can be close minded and maybe he was too, involving Jisung and his private life but it’s his roommate’s life, not his nor his schoolmates’ so there shouldn’t be judgment made towards him.
The other half of his mind wants to forget about it. Because like he said, it’s Jisung’s life; He shouldn’t be caring about it so much.
But he does.
“Hey Jisung?” Hyunjin musters up the courage to ask Jisung about it. If he doesn’t want to talk about it, he’ll push him no further.
His roommate makes a noise of acknowledgement around his soda can and then burps.
“Ah, sorry,” Jisung blushes, “what is it?”
“Can I ask you something?”
“You kind of already did.” Jisung jokes and Hyunjin gives him a disappointed look.
“Too corny? Yeah, you would know,” Jisung jabs but Hyunjin only clicks his tongue.
“But seriously, ask away.” he gestures for the older to continue, smile still pasted on his face.
“It’s kind of personal, you can always not answer it.” Hyunjin is quick not to make the younger feel uncomfortable, “You can always back away.” Hyunjin adds lamely.
“Sure.” Jisung smiles at him.
“What do you feel about people criticizing you for sleeping with many people?”
The boy in front of him stops chewing and only studies his 5th chicken wing and Hyunjin takes this as a bad sign. He wanted to get the question out before he could stumble his words and make it much more excruciating for the both of them. He could’ve said it more sophisticatedly, making it easier for the ears to hear but he’s anything but when it comes to serious conversations.
He takes Jisung’s silence to tear his gaze from him. For a lack of anything to do to ease the tension, Hyunjin bites into a drumstick and simultaneously wiggles his socked toes underneath the table.
Hyunjin continues to finish off his chicken and when he does, he wipes his fingers and settles his hands on the table. He reaches for his soda to take a sip and prepares to dip from the kitchen when Jisung clears his throat and taps Hyunjin’s free hand.
The latter looks down and Jisung’s tapping him three times with his index finger.
“I'm not mad, Hyunjin."
Hyunjin lets out a breath that he didn’t know he was holding.
“Right.” His voice breaks like he’s 13 again and it elicits a snort from the younger.
Tension seeps away from Hyunjin’s shoulders and wiggles in seat, relaxing as it looks like Jisung’s fine with the topic.
“Well, uhm,” Jisung stumbles in his own words which makes Hyunjin worry. He stands up to pour water for the other but Jisung laughs it off. “I’m not gonna cry, I just don’t know what to say.” he explains but gladly takes the glass anyway.
“Obviously I’m bummed out by what people think of me,” Jisung starts, “but what can I do? I can’t exactly go ‘hey! I’m not a man-slut that you think I am’ and they’re gonna go like ‘oh okay!’”
Hyunjin grins at Jisung’s mockery.
“I don’t wanna justify to thousands of people that I’m just me who happens to not care much about relationships. I’m in my third year of college and I’ve got no time to think about it deeply…" Jisung takes a pause. "Was that kind of mean?”
“What, about not having relationships?” Jisung hums in agreement, “No, I don’t think so. College is hard enough as it is so I can’t say I blame you for not taking steps further… That's what you meant, right? You don’t want to take things further yet?”
“Yes, you’re right.” Jisung chuckles at Hyunjin's hesitancy.
The younger leans his head on his arm on the table then drums his fingers on the surface. Hyunjin mirrors the actions, feeling sleepy and full from their dinner.
The rhythmic drumming stops and Jisung points at him, sort of accusingly.
“But I can.”
“Can what?” He throws his roommate a weird look.
“I can take things further. When or if I want to.”
Hyunjin smirks at him, “I never said you aren’t capable of doing that.”
“I know, I’m just clarifying.” He snickers at that.
A few more moments of comfortable silence with the occasional sounds of sipping fizzy drinks, Jisung speaks up again.
“Thank you.”
“Hmm? For what?”
“Not thinking I was a man-whore.” Jisung sounds solemn, as if this was weighing on his mind for a long time. Does this man actually get deep hatred for what he does? It tugs at Hyunjin’s heartstrings. He didn’t know he could feel that way for Jisung.
He must mean something to you then, Hyunjin’s conscience points out.
Probably just shame and concern.
He considers accepting his gratitude but he remembers how he was- how he thought badly of Jisung, despite warming up to him. He’s had his bad judgment against the boy and he won’t deny that. It’d be unfair and he’d be a fraud if he kept that all to himself and lied to his friend.
“Actually, no. I did think of you as something like that. It was a couple of weeks since I moved in and we weren’t good friends yet so that was all I had to go by as your personality. I’m sorry.” Hyunjin curls in himself. “I’m really sorry.” He reiterates.
Jisung says nothing and Hyunjin’s too scared to look up at him.
“You could’ve just accepted my ‘thank you’ and now I feel sad.” The boy across from him says suddenly, then he clutches his heart and fake cries.
“Then I’d be a bad friend. I don’t wanna lie to you, stupid.” Hyunjin explains, amused at how lightly Jisung takes the feedback.
“And now you’re calling me stupid!” Jisung whines some more and erupts into laughter.
“You’re unbelievable.” Hyunjin rolls his eyes at Jisung who only chortles at him.
“I think I’m gonna clean up then go to bed.” Hyunjin announces finally, as the laughter dies down and they’re not lazy enough to check the time.
The other gets up as well and sets to clean up but the older stops him.
“I’ll do it,” Jisung gives him a questioning look but Hyunjin shoos him off, “I’ll clean up, it’s fine.”
He gives Hyunjin a look and playfully punches his shoulder. Hyunjin rubs where Jisung hit him and jokingly gives him puppy eyes.
“Still, thank you for telling the truth and for.. everything else.”
Hyunjin gives Jisung a fist bump and the other reciprocates. They stay longer in that position, looking at nothing but each other.
If by chance Hyunjin's cheeks feel like heating up and his heart’s pace accelerates like he just ran from the apartment lobby to here, it’s not real.
“Goodnight, Hyunjin.” Jisung says finally, maybe feeling the awkward tension as well.
The slam of Jisung’s door takes him back to reality.
Standing in the middle of the kitchen, Hyunjin stares at the hand Jisung connected with. The feeling of Jisung’s hand lingers. But why?
Despite his heart still beating fast and his cheeks are still hot, he ignores it and cleans the mess up.
He's has 2 full mugs of beers to drink and it's been a long day- his mind is just probably hazy, therefore playing tricks on him.
He's not thinking clearly is the conclusion.
He finishes up in the kitchen by washing his hands and checking if the door is locked and heads to his room.
-
“Hurry up, Jisung,” It's the next day, nearing noon and the boys of apartment 325 are readying to go out, watch a movie and just hang out. Both of them had free time for the whole day so why not unwind until stress week comes back again?
It was a given that they shouldn’t go anywhere far or go to an amusement park or anything that required bookings, so a trip to the cinema was the plan they settled for.
But if Jisung’s going to take his extra precious time in his room doing... whatever he is doing, then maybe they won’t have time to go out.
“Just a sec!”
Hyunjin sighed. Well, he supposes it’s fine, the movies aren’t far from their apartment anyway so there’s really no point to rush. He’s already dressed so when Jisung’s done, it’ll be a quick once-over of their apartment to see if any appliances are still on then they’re off.
Leaning on the door of Jisung’s room, Hyunjin took out his phone for a quick game of KartRider but before he can even load the game, the door opens and Hyunjin stumbles back, on his butt.
He hissed in pain and looked up, finding Jisung doubled over, stifling his laughter.
“I’m okay, by the way.” Hyunjin rolled his eyes at Jisung, who’s now on the verge of tears.
“How would I know you were waiting on the other side?”
“Okay, you're right, it's my fault.” Hyunjin huffed in reluctant admission and takes Jisung's hand outstretched for him.
“Thanks,” he mutters. Jisung still wearing a shit-eating grin and Hyunjin continues, “you’re a sadist.”
“How can you say that when you look stupid.” he cackles.
Hyunjin lets the younger laugh out loud for a few moments and when they subside into giggles and hiccups, the older gives him a soft smile, before aggressively flicking his forehead.
“Idiot.” he calls him without malice before heading for the kitchen to hand Jisung a glass of water. The latter takes it without another word.
“Are you good now?” Jisung nods at him and they finally move their feet.
“Oh, hold on,” Hyunjin gently pulls Jisung before he can go out of the threshold then fixes a strand of his hair that has strayed from the neat hairstyle, no doubt from when he was busting out his lungs earlier.
He fiddles with Jisung’s hair some more and with contentment, he hums.
“‘Kay, let’s go.”
Unbeknownst to him, Jisung is still like a statue and quiet by their apartment dorm as he stares at Hyunjin.
He comes to and jogs up to catch up with Hyunjin.
-
The two friends leave the cinema puzzlement glued on their faces. What they saw was definitely a movie, alright.
It was probably a low budget film and if he was being real, Hyunjin doesn’t know the actors that well. But maybe, they're just too dumb to understand the plot.
They waltzed into the cinema and picked whatever that looked cool and they chose one that was apparently an indie movie.
They shouldn’t have been disappointed because in the first place, they haven’t thought out their day well so everything was rushed. That doesn’t mean, however, that they can’t say that they should’ve just gone and took a stroll- it's a lovely day outside.
Now, Hyunjin and Jisung are in the mall’s food court eating some snacks- gimbap for Jisung and a burger for Hyunjin.
“‘M still hungry.” Jisung groans after a while, but Hyunjin’s still munching.
“Want some?” He offers.
“No, I think I wanna get a drink.” They scan the court together and Hyunjin points to a smoothie shop.
“How about that one?” Jisung turns his gaze at the direction Hyunjin pointed at.
“Ooh, yeah, I guess that could work.”
Hyunjin drops his gaze back to his food again when he realizes that Jisung still hasn’t left their table.
Through a mouthful of meat, Hyunjin looks up at his friend. “Do you need money or..?” He trails off, following Jisung’s eyes as he continues to ogle at the shop.
A boy around their age stands by the shop's counter, tending to a family as they tell the guy their orders.
Hyunjin turns back at Jisung, smirking, understanding the situation.
“Ask him out.”
Jisung is all but confident, spluttering at him, making Hyunjin laugh.
“I can’t do it while you’re watching me!” He blushes furiously.
“Have you never asked out someone while your friends are there?” Hyunjin fires at him.
“I have!” he defends, “But not around you.” Jisung replies.
“Oh, Jisungie’s shy around me?” Hyunjin teases with a cutesy tone and pinches his cheeks and Jisung is quick to swat his hands away. “Alright, I won’t look.” He covers his eyes and bows his head, mocking him.
“Don’t have to do that, it’ll make me more embarrassed.” the younger tips Hyunjin’s chin so he looks up. The latter makes eye contact with him and almost immediately Jisung retracts his hands.
“I’ll do it, then. Whatever!” He says mostly to himself, Hyunjin presumes and wishes him luck.
“I don’t need luck when I have a face like this.” Hyunjin pretend-gags before pushing the younger to walk towards where the cute employee is.
“Oh, Jisung, wait!” He calls before Jisung can go any further.
“Yeah?” He asks, bouncing on the balls of his feet, looking all kinds of jittery.
“I just want to say that..” Jisung looks at him eyes wide, expecting, asking what’s the matter. “Can you please buy me a berry smoothie?”
Jisung responds with a repulsed look before succumbing and takes Hyunjin’s request.
“Good luck!” He whisper-shouts.
-
As fate would have it, Jisung ends up at the back of a long queue in front of the shop. Hyunjin snickers at the sight of Jisung being anxious and restless.
The line fades away quickly though, so whenever Jisung looks like he’s about to cry, Hyunjin mouths a “you got this”.
Hyunjin shakes his head, entertained at his friend's misery as prods the leftovers on his plate. He thoroughly enjoys his time with Jisung that he forgets his weird thoughts last night and it's frankly an absurd scenario to worry about. Hyunjin again shakes his head over his concern over nothing.
When he looks up, Jisung has reached the counter and Hyunjin has to compose himself and not kick his feet and giggle from the scene unfolding in front of him. But he looks away to give Jisung his privacy- he’ll respect his friend’s wishes to ask the cute boy out without him eyeing him.
But every now and again, Hyunjin turns his head to see how his roommate’s doing.
At first glance, he sees Jisung pointing at the menu that’s posted somewhere at the back, out of line from Hyunjin’s sight. The employee smiles, and not a polite-employee smile but a genuine one, he can tell. Hyunjin then looks away.
He fiddles with his hands a few moments before turning back again to look.
Jisung still is looking at the cashier and from what he can tell, they’re having a small talk. While the man works, Hyunjin can see Jisung’s mouth moving and hands gesturing around animatedly. Jisung tends to do that, talking with his hands. It’s a pretty cute habit, Hyunjin thinks. He does that most when he doesn’t know what to say and hopes that his hands can convey what he means.
Hyunjin looks back at the table and giggles to himself. He hasn’t seen Jisung ask someone out during the time they’re friends. It’s kind of weird but he gets secondhand giddiness.
For the third time, Hyunjin turns to look at his roommate again and there he sees Jisung holding their beverages, but he’s still hanging around the counter.
He observes them for a while, and sees Jisung give the employee a shy smile. He’s probably asking him out now. By the look of the full smile the employee gives, he concludes that he has accepted Jisung’s date offer. He walks backwards and gives the guy a wink before Jisung heads back to their table.
When his friend has reached the table, Hyunjin playfully accuses his roommate.
“Did you just wink at him?”
“Duh, it’s a good way to seal the deal.” Jisung says, a-matter-of-factly. He passes the berry smoothie to him and the younger jumps into the story of what actually happened.
-
Jisung’s first date with Minho was a success and now, a week and a half later, the couple have gone on a handful of dates.
Minho spends half of the week in their apartment and sure, Hyunjin feels slight discomfort when he hears giggles from the living room once in a while, in the middle of the night telling him he shouldn’t go out to look for snacks but it’s fine. Nothing he hasn’t already experienced before. But now he knows it's different because Jisung and Minho are in a relationship, unlike the previous one-night stands.
If he felt like he's intruding Jisung's sessions before, this is that but a thousand times worse.
It is kind of hilarious because you look at it closely, it's becoming a (vicious) cycle. He's friends with someone, they find a partner, Hyunjin unintentionally interrupts them and finds a new friend to third wheel. He's back to square one.
Hyunjin balls his fists and, with a deep breath and an exhale, he reaches for his doorknob and steps out of his room to tiptoe to the kitchen.
It’s currently 6am and in an hour and a half he has a class to get to so he better get going, without waking anyone up in the process, of course.
He enters the kitchen and he relaxes from his stealth mode state, seeing Minho already awake.
“Good morning.” Hyunjin greets.
The other boy turns around and greets him back. “I made pancakes by the way.” He offers.
Taking a seat and reaching for utensils, Hyunjin digs in and gives the man across from him a thumbs up.
The air around them is slightly tense around them that it makes Hyunjin pinch his thigh after each bite, letting his body know he's uncomfortable, like it doesn't already know.
It's nothing mean, don't get him wrong, Minho's very cool, just the fact that they're not well accustomed yet.
“You woke up early, got a lecture today or something?” Hyunjin timidly asks, hoping to cut the silence.
“Yeah, something like that, I’ve got work today.” Minho smiles.
“Oh, okay.”
Uneasiness threatens to loom over them again until Jisung’s door opens with a slight creak and a yawning man emerges. Oh, thank God.
He slides his feet across the floor towards Minho and Jisung plants a kiss on Minho and heads to the bathroom to freshen up presumably and Hyunjin only stares at them.
Hyunjin pokes at his third pancake.
It’s childish, probably, to be look at the couple with disdain but honestly, it's more so frustration than jealousy.
He's finally breathing properly with Jisung and him finally friends and not sneak around each other but again, the cycle he's in is becoming exhausting now- the caution, the alienation and the whole package.
He’s happy for his friends, Soobin and Jisung, but he hopes he won’t be a third wheel in his apartment twice now.
“I hope you’re not uncomfortable with me being here with Jisung and all.” Minho says, breaking Hyunjin out of his trance.
“Huh? No! Not at all.” He smiles but he knows it’s coming out as fake. He clears his throat, “There’s really no problem at all."
Minho checks his phone and his eyes widen, “I’ve got to get going but, um, enjoy the pancakes and have a great day."
"Yeah, you too." Hyunjin says with a polite beam.
Minho turns to the direction of the bathroom and calls out to Jisung, “I’m gonna go now, bye, Jisung-ie!”
No farewell calls back and the two in the kitchen agree that Jisung must’ve fallen asleep on the toilet.
-
The next time Hyunjin and Jisung are hanging out, it is three days from the pancake breakfast day.
It just the two of them lounging about in the dining area. Jisung has just gotten off from facetiming Minho and now he's with Hyunjin.
"How's Minho?" Hyunjin asks, not looking up from his sketchbook.
"He's good, studying, just like we are." He replies.
Hyunjin takes a second to look at Jisung, elbows on the counter, chin resting on one hand and the other holding his phone.
"'We?'" He questions, failing to keep his cool, "bet you're stressed out like I am."
"Okay, Mr. Productive, no need to scold me. I'm literally allergic to books right now." Jisung replies, slumping and then fake-wailing.
Hyunjin nods in sympathy, "Music stuff beating your ass?"
Jisung groans in response. "I don't need to learn about the history of music, I'm not gonna need it when I make it as a producer."
Hyunjin smiles and pats Jisung's head to comfort him.
"There, there, tiny baby-man, you'll get through it." He looks back again at his house design, then says off-handedly, "And if you fail, that's part of the process, it's normal. But I know you won't fail."
From the corner of his eye, Jisung rises from his folded arms and... looks at him intently.
Hyunjin would like to focus on his design, needing to at least perfect the house walls but blurry Jisung to his left seems to have his eyes glued on him.
Bracing himself slowly, Hyunjin puts his pencil down and his hands come up to shield his face, fearing Jisung is plotting something or whatnot, because why's he staring?
"Tell me what's wrong with my face for you to stare at me like that or I'm gonna think you're plotting my death."
But his roommate doesn't budge with his words, only continuing with his "activity".
"Jisung, don't make me have a heart attack again, I swear to G-"
"And if I fail, will you take responsibility?"
"What are you talking about?" Hyunjin asks, bringing his arms down to look at Jisung.
"If I do fail, what then?"
"If you do fail, and I promise you won't, again, that's part of the process. You just have to suck it up and try again."
"You sure you're not just saying that?" Jisung says, head hung low.
"Why would I just be saying that? You're not the smartest person in the room, even right now," Jisung attempts to hit him with his own book but Hyunjin dodges it, "but I know you're extremely passionate. If you have to do something, you're gonna do it with laser focus. You're probably just in a slump, I know you'll get back in work-mode and work your small butt off."
"Hey!"
"All of it is true." Hyunjin smiles sincerely at Jisung. He sees Jisung relax after a few moments before he buries his head in his arms again.
Hyunjin gets back to his book and it's a few minutes with him highlighting words and folding the pages and Jisung in his folded arms before the later sits up straight again and faces him.
"Wanna go out for a while?"
Hyunjin clicks his tongue. "A proof that you're a dumbass- Jisung, I'm freaking occupied! I can't right now, stupid."
Jisung glances at the clock that reads 9PM on the wall before looking back at Hyunjin.
"If we get back before 12, will you come with me?"
It's now Hyunjin's turn in attempting to hit Jisung.
"11! 11:30PM! If we get back before 11:30, will you come with me?"
Hyunjin knows he's not gonna win this argument, especially if there's that glint in Jisung's eyes that shows determination and passion.
Hyunjin sighs in defeat; he really should stop enabling the boy in front of him.
"Let's go."
_
The chilly November air nips at Hyunjin's ears and exposed fingertips and he has half the mind to get up and leave Jisung by himself in the park.
The park they're at right now, Haneul Park, is around 20 minutes from their apartment building and while Hyunjin is angry at Jisung for letting him join him in their little expedition in this cold autumn night, Hyunjin will forget that right now for the view.
It's nothing too fancy, lights, trees, benches; something you often see in any other parks but for what it is- an escape from his troubles, he'll take it.
"I guess I should thank you, then." Hyunjin says as Jisung leads him to one of the park benches for them to sit in.
"Do you like it?" Jisung asks with a small smile.
"Yeah, it's pretty." Hyunjin replies, head tilted up tp admire the night sky but to his dismay, it's cloudy and moonless.
"It'd be better if there were stars or if we're here in the morning." Jisung says, like he heard Hyunjin's thoughts.
"No doubt but if that's the case, why'd you bring me hear then?" Hyunjin turns to look at Jisung, who's looking down on the remaining side of his side of the bench.
Jisung meets his eyes and, after a moment of thinking, he shrugs, "You seemed so tired."
Hyunjin feels his gaze stay on Jisung for longer than it should, heart melting at the concern and then replies with nothing but a hum.
"You can always tell me when you're stressed, y'know, I'll see what I can do to help you."
The sentiment touches his heart but he drops the topic- no need to remind himself of his school load.
"Is this you're favorite park?"
Jisung snorts, "No."
Hyunjin eyes at him incredulously and then laughs with him.
"Then why the-?"
"Hyunjin, come look."
The smile on the boy's face fades slightly as he peers at the thing Jisung is pointing at.
On Jisung's right side, the space unoccupied by him, are letters he cannot read.
"What am I looking at exactly?" Hyunjin says, eyes still squinting at the small, incomprehensible letters.
Jisung turns his phone flashlight on and lights the bench for him.
HJS.
"Oh! Oh." Hyunjin giggles and glances at his friend, of whom he doesn't realize is inches away from his face.
Jisung looks away and Hyunjin sits properly on his side of the bench again.
"Those are my, um, my initials!" Jisung says, stuttering as he explains. "This is the first park I went to after I got accepted at KNU." He says proudly.
"Hangang Park would've been amazing to go to but at that time, there were a lot of people there so after eating out with my parents, we came here and I did this!" He traces the letters with his finger and Hyunjin watches him as he does.
"If Hangang wasn't so crowded, I'd have my initials on their benches but alas..."
Hyunjin smiles at him, "This is vandalism, y'know."
The other boy grins back, "Maybe, but it feels good leaving your mark on the world."
Hyunjin ponders about it and mutters an answer in agreement.
"Do- do you want to put your name here?" Jisung asks suddenly.
Hyunjin feels his eyebrows furrow as he studies Jisung- his face and how he twiddles his fingers.
He lets out a breath, "We should've worn gloves."
He doesn't receive a reply but ice-cold fingers press against his cheeks, making him jump.
"What the hell is wrong with you?!" Hyunjin screeches as he brings his sleeved-arms up to warm his cheeks all the while Jisung laughs at his reaction. Hyunjin flicks his forehead to make him stop.
Silence and cold overcome them again before Hyunjin speaks up.
"Do your friends know about this park?"
"Yeah, they've come here with me before. They don't know about the initials though." Out of the corner of his eye, Jisung looks back down at the carving on the wood.
"And Minho?"
Jisung is slow in turning his head to Hyunjin, he realizes; he must be thinking about it, "No."
Hyunjin drags an inhale, the sharp air piercing his lungs and lets out a slow exhale, "What time is it, Sung-ah?"
The bright lockscreen of Jisung's phone tears the darkness of their area.
"11:01."
His mouth twist in a pout, thinking.
"Let me nap for 15 minutes and then we'll go."
Jisung breathes out a chuckle and Hyunjin lets himself slouch for a more comfortable (or whatever comfort you can get in the dead of night during autumn) position, but, to his surprise, Jisung brings his head to his shoulder. Hyunjin welcomes the warmth with open arms.
"Wake me up not later than 15 minutes or I will murder you when I wake up."
"Yes, Hyunjinnie, don't worry."
The night deepens and the gap between the two boys lessen as they sit by each other sharing warmth.
-
Jisung lets Hyunjin sleep for 20 minutes and the latter kicks Jisung's shin until he explains that he has called a taxi so they don't have to wait for a passing one.
When they get back home, it's quarter to 12 and Hyunjin murmurs something about waking up at 4AM to finish his schoolwork before he mumbles his 'good night' to Jisung and heads to his room.
But upon arrival, all Jisung is thinking about are the events that transpired.
He trudges in his room with clumsiness and head not in its usual state.
He paces around his bedroom and he realizes something: He’s seeing Hyunjin in a new light, a new angle: Hyunjin was his quiet roommate who only talked to him when necessary and vice versa. Then, he was his friend, who he could come to for support and comfort if needed. Now he is Hyunjin, who has inched his way to his heart.
In hindsight, maybe he was always knocking on his heart. When he, without fail, asked if Jisung has eaten yet, even if there was awkwardness in between them; or when they were already friends and would entertain his antics; or all of those times Hyunjin has comforted him when he was troubled; or even when he called him handsome while stuttering.
Or maybe when they were out just now and the atmosphere was quiet and calm and it was just them two.
Breathe in and out; inhale, exhale.
If this is it, if this is how he finally realizes that he’s falling for the boy just beyond the walls of his room, then he isn’t going to mess this up.
So naturally, he messes it up.