Chapter Text
Chapter 3: Calming Presence
Natasha stood in front of the mirror with her shirt flipped up as she closely scrutinised her stomach. Looking for the little tells of that she was carrying another human being within her. She had finally gotten to the point of acceptance but she still felt that she would be no good as a mother. But she thought that all new mothers would have felt this way, at some point or another. That seemed to be the only logical thought that she happily accepted as she pulled her shirt down and soothed it over her hips.
At eight weeks, there was nothing to discern the fact, other than the darken circles under her eyes from the lack of rest that she was currently receiving or that she spent most of her early mornings inspecting the toilet bowl. No one was any the wiser to her current condition but she knew that she would have to inform Director Fury at some point and before there was no denying the evidence. Natasha had never been one to worry about the rumours that circulated the hallways but even she knew that this would definitely get the tongues wagging. Everyone knew about the betting pool and she was slightly interested to see as to who they put the father as.
With a tiny smile on her face, she spun on her heels and made her way out of her bedroom and walked down to the kitchen. Stopping short as Tony stood at the sink with his arms folded over his chest, staring out of the floor to ceiling windows. A pensive expression was upon his face as he turned quickly and glance at Natasha standing there. His expression instantly disappeared at her furrowed brows.
"Come to join the land of the living, Natasha?" Tony smirked as he reached over and flicked the switch to start up the coffee machine.
"Bit early for you, Tony?" Natasha muttered as she stepped across the threshold and over to the refrigerator; opening the door as she looked at all the food that sat there. Her mind undecided on what exactly she wanted.
"Who said I went to sleep?" His smirk did not quite reach his eyes as he glanced once more out of the windows.
"So that explains the witty words." Natasha threw over her shoulder at him as she pulled the eggs and cream from their respective places. Straightening up as she moved to stand next to him, setting her ingredients down onto the counter before she moved off to find the rest of the equipment that she would need to make her meal.
"Hmm." Tony murmured noncommittally which was a clear indication that his attention was clearly not in the room let alone with the conversation that they were having at present.
"What's wrong?" Natasha folded her arms as she leaned a hip against the counter. Her stance mimicked Clint before she brushed a piece of hair behind her ear.
"What's to say there is something wrong?" Tony asked distractedly before he visibly shook himself off and stared directly at her, his vision seeming to be tracking her every movement. Natasha was feeling kind of crept out about it.
"Staring off into the distance with no verbal comebacks." Natasha shot him a look that read: Do I really need to continue?
"Point duly noted." He blinked at her before sighing and running a hand through his hair as his face contorting into a grimace at the fact that she had caught him out doing just exactly that. "Just got something on my mind."
"I worked that much out." Natasha dryly muttered to him as she inclined her head for him to continue on with his thought process. Which in itself is a very dangerous endeavour to embarked upon but she just could not stop herself.
"Would you marry me?" Tony blurted out as Natasha did a double take and nearly chocked on her laughter as he slowly blinked at her. She was starting to think that the man was bipolar.
"Um. . .Wow, Stark. I don't know what to say!" Natasha bit her lip. She was struggling to maintain a serious face as he continued to watch her. She had no idea where that question came from and she was sure that she had not given him any reason to think that way.
"Not like that." Tony snorted as he waved his hand in the region of her stomach. "I know that you are already spoken for." He folded his arms as his long fingers tapped out a beat that only he was listening too. "Okay, let's try this again. Would you marry me?"
"Me. . .Personally. . .Not in a million years." Natasha tilted her head as she watched his shoulders slump slightly. She raised an eyebrow as an idea formed in her head. "But I do know of someone that wouldn't miss it for the entire world."
"And how did you come by that assessment?" Tony glared at her as he placed his hands upon his hips.
"Simple observation!" Natasha smiled sweetly at him with a hint of steel within her eyes as she turned around and started to prepare her meal. "It's really not that difficult to figure."
"I take it's about as easy as you and Barton?" He retorted as he calmly continued to gaze at her as her back stiffen at the mention of his name. Her eyes narrowing down to slits as she glared at him. "Okay, touchy subject." He held his palms up and out as Natasha blew a ragged breath out.
Steve came around the corner as he stopped and absorbed the stand-off that was happening in the kitchen between Tony and Natasha; which he could not really say that he was surprised by that at all. Tony just had the knack for annoying his teammates to the point of death, his of course, but that was just semantics. The air itself was decidedly chillier than it was an hour ago when he was in here last. He shook his head before making his way over to the cupboard and pulled a glass down setting it down upon the counter. He turned upon his heel as he headed towards the fridge and snagging the orange juice out of the door, he made his way back to his glass and started to pour the juice out when he froze as he heard a hiss behind him.
"What have I done now?" Steve asked wearily as he slowly turned around to face Natasha. Almost gulping with dread at the narrow eyed expression she was giving him and he just knew how insane Clint was now. This was far worst than any mine field that he had ever been in. He inwardly groaned before pulling himself up to his full height. His eyes twitched at the baring of her teeth.
"That's mine!" She almost snarled at him as she pointed to the carton in his hand. A sense of battle was tingling along her spine as she continued to glare at them. Steve glanced down at the offending drink sitting harmlessly within his grasp before shifting his eyes back onto her. He wonder how the #!*% did he get into this mess and most importantly on how he was going to extract himself with limbs intact, hopefully, from the insane situation that was currently Natasha. A hidden smile tugged at his lips as the smell of burning food caught his attention.
"Your eggs are burning." Steve pointed out as Natasha snapped her eyes away to deal with her meal before she briefly glanced once more at him. He continued to watch her as the flames licked the sides of her eyes. He was not out of her line of fire. So he did the next best thing and asked for permission. "May I have a glass, please?" He hedged as he really had no idea on how she would react to that. He could tell when the light of battle left her eyes and she nodded her head. He almost wiped his brow as one major obstacle had been overcome and it was only nine thirty in the morning.
"Could you pour me a glass as well, thanks?" Natasha muttered as another feeling of uneasiness flooded her nervous system. She was starting to dislike the new emotions that were constantly being emitted. She arranged her eggs onto a plate as she placed the pan into the sink for it to be cleaned later. She grabbed her plate and glass of juice with a muttered thank you and quickly vacated out of the room. She could not believe that she just went toe-to-toe with Steve over a glass of orange juice.
"That was intense." Steve murmured as he watched her leave the room. "I thought she was about to tear me to pieces."
"And it'll only get worst." Tony rubbed at his chin in deep thought. "I'm sure we can blame it on the hormones."
"Think we should run for cover?" Steve was being serious as he swallowed the rest of his juice in one gulp. Walking over to the sink and rinsed his glass out before he washed the pan up and place it in the drainer as well.
"And miss the pendulum of moods that is currently Natasha?" Tony smirked at the look of utter horror that crossed Steve's face. "Not on your life."
"You must have a death wish." Steve muttered under his breath as he wiped his hands on the dish towel before he folded it and put it away.
"Come on, it'll be fun!" Tony sniggered.
"Yeah, it'll be real swell." Steve rolled his eyes as he folded his arms across his chest. Not believing for one moment that it would be as fun as Tony made it out to be. He carefully gauged his clearly unstable teammate before pushing himself off the counter and walked towards the door before throwing over his shoulder. "I think you need some rest, Tony, because your brain is not engaged."
"Nothing wrong with my thought process." Tony's snarky voice echoed after Steve. "I'm living in a nuthouse." He shook his head as he turned back once more towards the window.
Clint blew on his hot cup of coffee as his gaze flicked out over the horizon. The world itself was silent as the breeze had increased with speed over time. The temperature was dropping rapidly and he could see that the sky was darkening from the heavy clouds that hung in the distance. He had been expecting the change in the weather as he continued to gaze out of the window. Stuck deep in his thoughts as he went over his supplies that he currently had and what he would need after a period of time that the snow itself would last. He was just thankful that he had chopped wood a couple of days ago in preparation for the coming storm.
He caught a glimpse of the wolf that had been watching him earlier in the week. The feeling of being hunted was not there but they would continue to observe what the other would be doing. It reminded him very much of Natasha when she first came to join S.H.I.E.L.D; the watchful silence as she had sat there trying to work out how the system ran and how she fitted into it. He loved the way her brain would tick over with her thoughts. He leaned his head back and huffed out a breath as he closed his eyes tightly against the onslaught of pain. Making him wonder that maybe he should have slipped over the border and seen her from a distance but he knew that Fury would have his head served on a silver platter; if he ever step a foot back into New York City.
He was off the grid here. No one would be able to find him in the backwoods of nowhere with no electricity and phone. Well, except for the one currently in his possession and he had not charged the battery for the fear that Natasha would get her hands on the number, which in turn, would get her on the next available flight out of New York and hunt him down. What she would do to him? Was best left alone if she ever caught wind of what he was doing. But still, it got #!*% lonely here. He lift his cup to his lips and tilted it as he took a sip of the hot beverage before he placed the cup down onto the coffee table before pushing himself into a standing position.
Walking over to where the wood pile was stack, he realised that he would need more wood if he was going to make it through the next few days. Running his hand down his face as he calculated on exactly how much he would need, he stalked over to the door before pulling on his boots and coat as his hand made their way into the pocket for his fingerless gloves; slipping them on before he turned the door knob and made his way silently over to the woodshed. He could feel that he was being watched as his sharp gaze searched the area before spotting a familiar shadow of the wolf that he had seen earlier through the window pane. A small smile tugged at his mouth as he shook his head before he went to the woodpile and gathered the amount that he would need before loading what he could carry into his arms.
It took him four trips to finally get the work done. His muscles were tingling with all the carrying that he had been doing. Sure, he was already in prime shape, had to be with his line of work and choice of weaponry. His gaze coming to rest briefly on his seldom used bow but it still felt nice to do some physical labour. Rubbing his hands together as he stomped his feet. He was just thankful that the trek was not longer between the two buildings because it would be difficult to navigate between them if he ever needed anymore wood.
He carefully toed off his boots before he crossed the room and double checked his water supply; it was not like that he did not have more coming anyway. He knew that his food supply was fine and that he had candles in the drawer, if and when, he needed them. He scanned around his home before he marched over to the cupboard and opened it. His hand reached in and snagged the first heavy blanket that he could grab before throwing it across his bed. Making his way over to the fireplace, he kneel down and started the fire as he turned his head at the flakes of snow that were drifting down his window. The wind was starting to howl as the fire flickered to life. He dusted his hands as he stood up and walked over to his seriously cold cup of coffee. Hanging his head as he groaned before picking up the cup and making himself a fresh one before sitting down in front of the fire to stare into the dancing flames, lost within his memories with a tiny smile upon his harden face.
"Where are you going?" Tony called out as he spied Natasha walking past the room that he was currently lounging in. The remote was dangling loosely within his grasp as the volume was turned down low. His attention not even focused on the infomercial that was blinking brightly within the darken room. His eyes looking more blood shot than they did this morning.
"Have you been to sleep yet, Stark?" Natasha glanced over to him when she finally stopped and back tracked to where she heard his voice come from.
"Sleep is over rated." He huffed as he waved his hand about in the air.
"I'm pretty sure that Pepper wouldn't agree with you." Natasha huff a breath out as she continued to watch the sleep deprived billionaire. She was torn between laughter and despair with him.
"What would she know?" Tony muttered before dragging his hand down his face. Natasha lifted her eyebrow in disbelief. "She's standing right behind me, isn't she?"
"You could say that!" Natasha snickered at the way that his eyes widen as his mouth worked to form an apology before turning his head around, only to find that a blank wall was behind him. His face scowling as he turned heated eyes onto her.
"That was just plain evil." Tony retorted as he moved to stand up from his seat.
"If you had your full. . ." Natasha started as she crossed her arms over her chest.
"Director Fury called, Ms. Romanoff." Jarvis smoothly interrupted the beginnings of their heated debate. "He wishes to meet with you."
"Thank you, Jarvis." Natasha returned politely as she continued to gaze at Tony. His features were starting to look haggard under the soft glow of the television. "You really need to sleep, Tony."
"No, I'm fine." Tony brushed off her concern.
"Look we can do this the easy way or the hard way; your decision?" Natasha firmly stated as worry settled into the pit of her stomach. She knew what it was like not to get the needed rest but she had also been trained to function mentally and physically without it. It had even saved her life a few times and now, was not one of them.
"Are you threatening me?" Tony grasped at her, the hurt clearly ringing through his voice at her seeming betrayal that Natasha just wanted to knock him out and be done with it.
"No, Stark, I wouldn't do something so mundane." She pinched the bridge of her nose before turning her eyes towards the ceiling and drew in a deep breath. She did not think that Clint in all of his stubbornness could be this difficult and they had some pretty speculator stand-offs in their history.
"That is not very reassuring." Tony sprouted as he widened his eyes to impossible sizes.
"I can get Bruce up here to deal with you." Natasha could feel her patience slipping with each passing moment. "You need to sleep!" She finally snapped at him.
"I know that but I just can't. No matter how much I try." Tony whispered into the room as his shoulders slumping forward in defeat. "The black void keeps calling to me." He speared her with his eyes. "I have done a lot of things that I am not particular proud of. . ."
"I know." Natasha offered the olive leaf. "We all have our demons that we have to deal with."
"Yeah, that much I do know." Tony ran his hand down his face, feeling for the first time as bone tired as he can be. As if, the weight of the world rested only upon his shoulders. "How do you do it?"
"Sleep when I can and workout when I can not." Natasha shrugged her shoulders. She did not have all the answers but she would help with what she did know. "Have you told Pepper about this?"
"I don't sleep well as it is." Tony chuckled humourlessly. "And I don't really want to burden her anymore than I already have." Natasha nodded her head in understanding. She had felt the same way when it came to Clint but as she came to learn that it was part of being in a partnership with him.
"You'll be very surprised." Natasha advised as she took a step into the room and gently pushed Tony back down into his chair before kneeling at his head to massage his temples. It was something that she would do for Clint when he found it near impossible to sleep. Her voice had taken on a husky tone as she hummed an unnamed song. Her sharp eyes watching as Tony fought to close his eyes. It was like soothing a child, albeit a full grown one, to sleep. She heard the soft footfalls before the sharp intake of breath of Pepper as she entered the room.
"You haven't killed him, have you?" Pepper's voice held a playful tone to it. Natasha tilted her head as she blinked steadily at the other woman.
"Thought about it." Natasha smirked as she scooted away and allowed Pepper to take her seat.
"How did you get him to sleep?" Pepper was awed by what Natasha had done.
"Same thing that I do for Clint," She held her finger to her lips as she swore Pepper to that secret. "Especially when he hasn't slept for days and his mind is still wired. Funny to watch but it gets tiring after awhile."
"I can't even imagine that." Pepper chewed her lip for a moment. "He always seemed so serious."
"That was just him thinking." Natasha smiled fondly as she reached over and clasped the other woman on the shoulder before giving her a gentle squeeze before she stood up and walked from the room. Her original mission forgotten about as she headed towards the gym; Bruce did say that she was allowed to do light exercises after all. A mischievous smile pulled at her lips as she waited for the elevator. She was going to get into so much trouble as she chuckled darkly before entering the elevator and pushed the floor that she wanted.