Chapter Text
On the other side of the planet, the sun has just risen on Corson V's dump. The dump is dull and full of hella dangerous tools & junk & stuff, like old failed virtual pets, holes of junk video games, and gigantic imperial suits that no one could be bothered to harvest for scrap, truly this is the Sci-fi reality we all desired.
In the mounds of junk & crap, a lanky figure can be seen digging in it. For what you ask? Idk I don't want to write a character's future plans, this is a crack fic about Ratchet getting high. Anyways, if you're wondering who the lanky figure is, it's Nefarious, the doctor one, not the one who got tentacle porned to death.
Nefarious can be seen in pajamas, like an old torn t-shirt and silvery metal socks, not even bothering to wear slippers, like the fiend he is, I shudder at the thought of how dirty those socks are.
(Design reference for your mind)
Dr.Nefarious: ugh 17+ years of scheming and THIS is where I end up? this just sucks!
He bitches and plops up on a horizontal pipe to continue to bitch to himself
Dr.Nefarious: Maybe this one will be good, yeah! It'll have everything this time, I'll just have to make it out of junk, it will be so easy!
He is completely delusional.
Just as he shouts out his last word, an orange blur pops out from the pipe onto the dirt and trash floor, the shock from the sudden appearance makes Dr.Nefarious "YELP" and put up his guard but he puts it down quickly and realizes who's body it is.
It was Ratchet…
HE LOOKED LIKE ABSOLUTE SHIT LIKE GAWD DAMN, this left Nefarious just completely confused.
Dr.Nefarious: what the…
He gets off the pipe and down to Ratchet and kinda just pokes him.
Dr.Nefarious: he's completely knocked out! I could end it right here right now, it would be so easy to kill him!
Dr.Nefarious props him up on the pipe to get a better look, see if he's genuinely out and all that.
Dr.Nefarious: wow he looks awful, THIS IS HILARIOUS!
he starts cackling to a many degree like you heard a really funny joke and you kind of just laugh like that sometimes, except he laughs like this all the time.
Nefarious activates that arm blade he had in all 4 one remember that attack? I do because I mained him in all 4 one and had a great time playing with my family:) Do you have a family to play all 4 one with? Yeah that's what I thought /J.
Dr.Nefarious: THIS IS HOW YOUR LEGACY ENDS RATCHET, IN A DUMP, TIRED, AND IN YOUR... your... pajamas.
Dr.Nefarious: Wait, I'm in a dump, tired, and in my pajamas. SHIT!
Dr.Nefarious: if I kill him like this I'll just look as stupid as him, and killing heroes like him is the kind of thing to end up in a history book, then it will be recorded with a really stupid name like the sleepover death, or the Walmart crackhead death.
Nefarious, putting together how dumb this "win" would be, makes a really rash decision and shakes Ratchet awake.
Dr.Nefarious: WAKE UP YOU PATHETIC SACK OF CANCEROUS ORGANS! WE ARE NOT HAVING OUR LEGACY'S BEING TAINTED BY LOOKING LIKE WALMART CRACKHEADS!
This wakes Ratchet up
Ratchet: wha- wait, holy shit Skeletor!
Dr.Nefarious: what.
Ratchet: Skeletor, you, that funny villain from the old 90's show He-Man!
Dr.Nefarious: what are you talking about-
Dr.Nefarious suddenly jerks back and covers where his nose would be with his shirt from how bad Ratchet smells.
Dr.Nefarious: AUGH YOU SMELL HORRIBLE! DID YOUR ORGANIC TONSILS ROT INSIDE YOU!?
Ratchet: tonsils? no they didn't…..
Ratchet zones out and just starts looking at the landscape like a tired child on a car trip.
Dr.Nefarious snaps his fingers at Ratchet trying to get him to focus.
Ratchet: oh, uh something about brownies or something I think, my mind is really woozy right now. Why are you gray?
(Skeletor is yellow)
Dr.Nefarious: what are you talking about???
Ratchet: Brownies!
Dr.Nefarious: That was just a singular word.
Dr.Nefarious looking at the situation in front of him slowly puts together the pieces
Bad smell, loopy behavior, brownies, Ratchet looking like sheit, it all connects to one answer.
Dr.Nefarious: ARE YOU ON WEED!!?!
Ratchet: maybe :3
Ratchet shrugs with the face of a mischievous cat.
Dr.Nefarious: oh my zoni, YOU ARE!
Nefarious points accusatory-ly with much accusation.
Dr.Nefarious: I thought you were some drug free good guy?
Ratchet stares into space with the many memories of property damage and broken traffic laws. Ratchet has stolen so much ammo…
Ratchet: I can do crime Skeletor! That's actually how I lose my money every year.
Illegal street racing is another crime I forgot to add. But Ratchet never used illegal drugs, unless you count the accidental usage in 2003, but those were legal in that galaxy.
Dr.Nefarious: oh, right.
Nefarious said this disappointedly as he remembered all of Ratchet's property damage in the Polaris galaxy, and the Solana galaxy and in his space station… But in Ratchet's defense, money.
Now the 2 were silent not knowing what to do next like the author was stumped on the next dialogue exchange and was waiting for an idea… wait shit, I got it.
Ratchet: why are you wearing that itchy friendship T-Shirt Qwark made on backwards? Wait, I got a guess! You bought it at a garage sale! I hope you didn't spend over 3 bolts on that because it is uncomfortable.
Dr.Nefarious was wearing the Bros B4 Foes shirt Qwark made and mailed to the only 4 people who were involved in the adventures except this shirt was torn up from Nefarious's shoulder guard armor thing, as said before, damn what if it is just robot armor? That would change the character design here by a bit, but I don't want to edit all the images I've made so far.
Nefarious, embarrassed by the fact he was wearing the friendship shirt starts getting defensive.
Dr.Nefarious: WHAT NO! THESE ARE PAJAMAS YOU'RE THE ONE WEARING THE DUMB "FRIENDSHIP" T-SHIRT-
Nefarious does that glitch thing from the games and the Lance and Janice soap opera plays
(Note add the dialogue later)
(New note I'm not writing soap opera dialogue, it's reading, use your imagination or something.)
Ratchet, having no compression of what's going on in front of him, grabs a pebble and throws it at Nefarious because Ratchets high and I can break a character's canon actions because he's high.
Dr.Nefarious: ACK- What!? DID YOU THROW A ROCK AT ME!?
Nefarious says this while quickly tying the shirt around his shoulder out of shame for the fashion embarrassment he wore.
Ratchet: no, yes, no?
All Dr.Nefarious can do here is stare in disbelief at how stupid this situation is and how stupid Ratchet's actions are, but Ratchet starts talking like he didn't just throw a pebble at Nefarious's head
Ratchet: sooo where's your cave?
Dr.Nefarious: what? Oh wait, you still think I'm Skeletor. Will hitting YOU with a pebble make you stop that?
Ratchet: I hope not.
Dr.Nefarious: will showing that I DON'T live in a cave prove to you that I'm not a cartoon skeleton?
Ratchet: I don't know you look pretty skeleton to me
Dr.Nefarious: That's not even a real sentence, you know what just get up and start walking and I'll prove to you that I'm not "Skeletor" or whoever that is.
Ratchet: alright!
Ratchet attempts to get up on his legs, he can't walk.
Ratchet: all not!
Dr.Nefarious: all not? What does that mean?!
Ratchet: my legs feel numb
Dr.Nefarious: of course you can't walk, what does that mean will I have to carry you!?
Ratchet looks up at Dr.Nefarious with a sad cat face.
Dr.Nefarious carries Ratchet to his house
It's a quiet walk. You could almost forget there's a furry on your back, but then Ratchet asks a question.
Ratchet: Hey Skeletor, why were you named Skeletor if you were born as some lame blue wizard?
Dr.Nefarious: I already told you I'm not Skele-
Nefarious, tired of Ratchet's Skeletor thing, decides to answer the question but as if it was directed at him, not Skeletor. Besides, it's a boring walk anyway.
Dr.Nefarious: It's a family name, now stop asking me questions.
Ratchet: what? But I have so many questions to ask a cartoon skeleton.
Dr.Nefarious: Fine, you get 3 more but that's it.
Ratchet smiles from the success of getting 3 Skeletor questions.
Area 1: Dump end
Area 2: "sheit shack"
Dr.Nefarious and Ratchet arrive at the house that Nefarious built when he started living in the dump. The house is, screw it I'm not describing it i can draw.
Ratchets immediate unfiltered reaction was
Ratchet: wow that looks like sheit
Dr.Nefarious(grumbly): yeah you try to build a house out of scrap metal
They both enter the house and Dr.Nefarious drops Ratchet on the floor
Ratchet: ow, hey you didn't have to drop me so hard!
Dr.Nefarious: it's a drop, it's always going to hurt. It's not as if I control gravity, actually wait…
A new scheme was brewing, but Nefarious shook his head
The greened out furry's gotta be dealt with before anything.
Ok here's a pic of the house's layout so you can get a scope of it.
See the large generator, it's like Oneshot which is like the name of this chapter, get it?
Dr.Nefarious: Ok you stay here and don't touch ANYTHING, you got that?
Ratchet was just about to lick the generator like it was a Himalayan salt lamp.
Dr.Nefarious grabs Ratchet before he can do anything and throws him onto the couch, much like how my dad would throw me into the void in All 4 One.
Dr.Nefarious: WHAT DID I JUST SAY?!
Ratchet: to be honest I wasn't listening, and I got really hungry and that cube looked pretty tasty.
Dr.Nefarious: that "cube" IS THE GENERATOR FOR THIS WHOLE HOUSE, and the refrigerator for all that baby oil…
Ratchet: why does a skeleton need baby oil? you got no flesh.
Dr.Nefarious: that's- NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!
Ratchet(singy voice): Skeletor question~
Dr.Nefarious: ugh fine, it's for ʷʰᵉⁿ ⁱ ᵇᵃᵇʸˢⁱᵗ
Ratchet: what?
Dr.Nefarious(annoyed): it's for when I babysit…
Ratchet: awww
Dr.Nefarious: shut up.
Dr.Nefarious shamefully walked over to the kitchen. At least he didn't kill Ratchet in his pajamas, yeah this wasn't a horrible idea at all…
Nefarious started looking for something in the bottom cabinets and while he did Ratchet followed him into the kitchen
Ratchet: You have a weird sink.
Dr.Nefarious(startled): AH, oh wait, what did I just say about not moving?!?
Ratchet: something about not doing it?
Dr.Nefarious: ok so your ears do work.
Dr.Nefarious grabs Ratchet and puts him back on the couch
Dr.Nefarious: ok how do I put this in a language stupid high organics like you will understand… oh, I got it.
Dr.Nefarious started talking to Ratchet like a preschooler
Dr.Nefarious: ok you see this floor?
Ratchet: yeah, nice carpets by the way
Dr.Nefarious: oh thanks, anyway this floor is lava and I'm lava-proof so weak organics like you can't walk in it.
He said this with the smile of a fed-up teacher.
Ratchet looked down at the floor and in his state he saw the salmon-colored carpets swirl into boiling hot lava.
Ratchet: OH CRAP! Thanks for the tip Skeletor that really would've killed me.
Dr.Nefarious: yes it would. Now I'm going to the kitchen to get you something that will ensure you won't touch the carp- Lava!
Nefarious went to the kitchen and came back with duct tape like he was from a song about lemonade and annoying customers.
Ratchet: what's that?
Dr.Nefarious: it's a "tool" that will stop you from falling into the lava and dying in your sleep, now stop squirming!
Ratchet: Wow, thanks Skeletor.
Dr.Nefarious: Don't mention it.
Ratchet was all tied up in the duct tape like it was a spider's cocoon except if it were made out of melted horse hooves. Is duct tape made with horse hooves? I'm too lazy to Google it.
Dr.Nefarious: good night and remember: if you touch anything, I will kill you!
This was said in a comically cheery tone.
Ratchet: Night!
It was early morning…
Dr.Nefarious went to his room and closed his door.
Dr.Nefarious: who knew that watching an ungodly amount of Bluey with Lawrence's child would come in handy for kidnapping Ratchet? Now to practice a monologue!
3 Hours pass and Ratchet wakes up from a sweaty uncomfortable sleep, the worst kind. Confused and dazed he shouts
Ratchet: Hello? Skeletor?
Dr.Nefarious couldn't hear Ratchet because he was practicing his laugh.
Ratchet, forgetting what Nefarious said, easily got up from the duct tape due to his horrifying strength and immediately fell into the generator from the wobbliness of the couch.
While in the bathroom Nefarious is still practicing his laugh & stuff and is interrupted by the lights going out.
Remembering the meditation lessons he took he manages to stay calm and walks to the main room to see ratchet ass deep in his generator like it's a soft bed.
Ratchet: Hey Skeletor! I was wondering where you were.
Dr.Nefarious: Ratchet, what did I say about moving?
Ratchet: not to?
Dr.Nefarious: And what did you just do?
Ratchet: oh… whoops
Dr.Nefarious: whoops? All you have to say is WHOOPS!?!!?
Ratchet: I just woke up so it's kinda hard to remember without a bit of fuzz.
Dr.Nefarious: you little- DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG IT TOOK ME TO FIND ALL THE PIECES TO BUILD THIS?! I CAN'T EVEN GO TO THE HARDWARE STORE TO BUY SUPPLIES BECAUSE GUESS WHOSE FACE WAS PLASTERED ALL OVER THE CITY AFTER THE DIMENSIONATOR INCIDENT I DIDN'T EVEN COORDINATE THAT WHOLE ATTACK! I SHOVED HIM INTO THE TENTACLE DIMENSION OR WHEREVER THAT PORTAL WENT. NOW YOU'RE HERE HIGH OFF YOUR OWN FURRY FUMES SMASHING UP MY THINGS! THIS IS WHY I WANT TO KILL YO-
and then he froze in a pose looking like he was about to strangle Ratchet. The room was left silent with only the white noise of soap operas, and with the light leaking in from the windows. It was almost peaceful but Ratchet was confused.
Ratchet: Skeletor? Skeletor are you ok?
Ratchet wobbled around Nefarious's frozen body unsure of what to do, so he slaps him on the cheek. Would it be a cheek? It feels like a fleshy word, oh well.
Dr.Nefarious: U-AHHH
he immediately crashed into his generator since he missed Ratchet. This was it, he somehow got bested by Ratchet while he was high. This is a horrible low point for any villain to reach.
Dr.Nefarious: Ugh, fine I give up. You're the worst, you know that?
Ratchet: no? Am I missing something?
Dr.Nefarious: YOU'RE STILL THAT HIGH?!!? I THOUGHT YOU JUST ATE EDIBLES!
Ratchet: No, I think I ate 3 days.
Ratchet misremembered this information horribly.
Dr.Nefarious: 3 days. 3 DAYS??? SCREW THIS I'M TAKING YOU HOME!
Ratchet: sweet!
Dr.Nefarious: Wait where do you live?
Ratchet: I can't remember, I think I was at a house for work maybe? Normally I stay with Talwyn.
Dr.Nefarious: That doesn't even give a- never mind I have an idea, but I just can't bring you while you look like you.
Dr.Nefarious thinks, then he turns around to see his fridge and remembers the baby oil. Baby... yes.
Area 2: "Sheit Shack" End
Area 3: Weanie hut Jr.
Nefarious and Ratchet arrive outside a villain pub. Once filled to capacity with crime doers, thugs, and legit supervillains, now it's filled with drunks and jaywalkers. There's always a constant in these types of places. An intel guy and/or doxers, those count too. These are the types of people who just conveniently have the exact information that you need to find someone or get a clue to the next big mcguffin. Am I just saying this so there's a way I can conveniently segway here? Yes, I am.
Dr.Nefarious walks over to a table with a shadowy figure at it.
Dr.Nefarious: Do you know where I could find Talwyn Apogee's house?
SlimCognito: no, I'm not an intel guy, I'm just banned from most bars.
Dr.Nefarious: oh, that's my bad then. Sorry!
SlimCognito: it's fine, this happens often. Also cute kid.
Dr.Nefarious looks down into his makeshift baby sling and sees Ratchet. If he were a baby right now he would be a ugly one.
Nefarious only responded with an uncomfortable
Dr.Nefarious: thanks…
But as soon as he left the table, another shadowy figure wearing a cloak got his attention.
Cloaked figure: did you say you needed to find Talwyn Apogee?
Dr.Nefarious: Yeah, do you know where she lives?
Cloaked Figure: of course I do. Actually I was just on my way there!
The figure was tall and had 2 heads stacked on top of each other, each one had their own set of eyes and voices. The big head on the bottom had a masculine voice, kinda like that chicken from Looney Toons, and the small head on the top had an annoying high-pitched voice like a south park kid. For convenience's sake, the bottom voice will be called Cloaked Figure B and the top voice will be called Cloaked Figure T
Cloaked Figure B: why do you need a ride there yourself?
Dr.Nefarious had to make a quick evil plan on why he would go to Talwyn, any evil idea would work.
Dr.Nefarious: acid bomb delivery.
Cloaked Figure T: wow you're just pulling a Bjork.
That was a lame crime pick and a creepy one that really shows what you watch online.
Cloaked Figure B: I love it! It's cruel and unusual, you really live to your reputation!
Dr.Nefarious: aww thanks, it's really just a made-up-in-the-moment idea!
He did the 💅🏳️🌈 Hand while saying this.
Cloaked Figure B: most great choices are made off impulse.
Cloaked Figure T: like genocide!
Dr.Nefarious: genocide seems a bit counterproductive but ok?
Cloaked Figure B: apologies, but anyway we can take you there and you can perform your nefarious deeds, oh I just got your name now hahahaha.
His laugh felt a bit forced, and it was generally uncomfortable but I mean a ride is a ride.
Area 3: Weanie hut Jr. End
Area 4: Small ship
The 3 approached the ship and boarded it.
Cloaked Figure B: watch your step, oh and I would recommend keeping your kid away from the Conveniently Places Gun Basket.
They weren't even sci-fi guns, just legit Glocks.
Nefarious, Ratchet, and the Cloaked Figure entered the ship. and it was definitely something. There were 2 driver's seats, one covered in plans and the other covered in a plush collection.
Dr.Nefarious: Wow, you really hate… uh
He already forgot Talwyn's name, he never even met her, he just knows she exists in case he wanted to do a damsel in distress plot, he never did it though because that was just some video game crap.
Cloaked Figure B: Talwyn Apogee
Dr.Nefarious: right… Why are you visiting her? I don't think I ever asked that.
Cloaked Figure B: simple, vengeance.
Cloaked Figure T: I wanna see Ratchet cry from her death!
Cloaked Figure B: that too, if it weren't for her I could've finally killed Ratchet and Clank.
Dr.Nefarious: you almost killed them!?
Cloaked Figure B: ah right, I guess we haven't formally introduced ourselves.
The figure rips off their cloak and the two heads are revealed, Percival Tachyon and Artimis Zogg, stacked on top of each other
(Pretty good for my first attempt at drawing these 2 if I do say so myself, Tachyon looks weird though)
Dr.Nefarious: ohhhh, wait no I don't know who you two are.
Tachyon: Really!? I killed almost all the Lombaxes
Dr.Nefarious: I don't really care for Lombax history. Lore isn't really important when it comes to murder plots.
Zogg: I teleported multiple planets and almost destroyed Veldin!
Dr.Nefarious: I only watch the news if I know something I care about will be covered, like an ominous foreshadowing!
Tachyon was left shocked but Zogg moved the conversation on.
Zogg: Well I suppose it doesn't matter that you don't know us, but we all have the same goal here.
Dr.Nefarious looks down at Ratchet still asleep in the sling. if Talwyn dies, Nefarious won't be able to give her his problem. So Nefarious goes to the back to sit down and think. Just then, Ratchet woke up.
Ratchet: huh? Where are we?
Nefarious quickly covers Ratchets mouth
Dr.Nefarious(whispering): we are going to your girlfriend's house, also you wasted a question. Now go back to sleep!
Ratchet dozes back to sleep with no hesitation and Nefarious lifts his hand
Dr.Nefarious: EW DID YOU LICK ME!?!
So Ratchet slept for a while, deep in sleep he felt his body move a bit until finally he woke up
in the middle of a Mexican standoff!!!! 📣📣📣
Ratchet: AHHH OH CRAP! WHY DO HUNGRY HUNGRY CATERPILLAR AND YOGI BEAR HAVE GUNS!?!?
Dr.Nefarious: THAT'S YOUR SECOND TO LAST QUESTION RATCHET!
Flashback sequence from about 30 minutes ago.
After Nefarious shouted "EW DID YOU LICK ME!?!", Zogg and Tachyon turned around and started interrogating Dr.Nefarious. Eventually, the ship bumped and Ratchet fell out the makeshift sling, then the guns came out of the Conveniently Placed Gun Basket and people started arguing and accusing each other and at one point someone cried but I won't say who it was.
Dr.Nefarious: And that's how we got here.
Tachyon: sounds accurate.
Zogg: yes it sounds like how I remember this started.
Ratchet: I don't see why Yogi Bear would be against the Hungry Hungry Caterpillar.
Zogg: simple, I want to kill Talwyn first and Tachyon wants to kill you first.
Ratchet: …who?
Zogg sighs
Zogg: I want to kill Talwyn first and the "Hungry Hungry Caterpillar" wants to kill you first.
Ratchet: ohhhh.
Tachyon: Wait, why do I have to be a lowly children's book character while Zogg gets to be a whole animated mascot!?
Zogg: Are you really concerned about whatever strange nickname he gives you?
Tachyon: You have no reason to be upset, your character got a live-action movie!
Dr.Nefarious: ok this has gone on long enough I guess I should just turn Ratchet ove- OH MY ZONI WHAT IS THAT!??!??!!!
Dr.Nefarious points to the front window and with that Zogg & Tachyon's attention follows.
There's nothing there and Dr.Nefarious escapes through the hatch on top of the ship while carrying Ratchet.
Dr.Nefarious: NERDS!!!!
Tachyon and Zogg were left in disbelief.
While on the roof due to sheer luck there's an orb of air surrounding the ship, which was probably a function that was part of the ship. Dr.Nefarious quickly uses the heat from his arm blade things to weld the hatch shut to buy time and yells.
Dr.Nefarious: WE ARE SCREWED, I DROPPED MY GUN AND YOU HAVE NO PANTS ON SO I CAN ONLY ASSUME THAT YOU DON'T HAVE YOUR INVENTORY!
Ratchet: I'm wearing pants.
Dr.Nefarious: what?
Ratchet lifts his shirt to reveal his cargo shorts with his belt on it which links to his inventory.
Dr.Nefarious: FINALLY SOMETHING USEFUL, NOW GIMME!
Ratchet: what do you say first.
Dr.Nefarious: I'm not saying-
An explosion is heard from behind the 2 and from the boom boom Zogg and Tachyon crawl out
Zogg: Did you really think you could stop us?
Tachyon: now you two will know the might of ROYALTY AND POLITICIANS!!!!
Ratchet immediately shoots them off the ship with the R.Y.N.O. and the two go flying into space like how Team Rocket blasts off.
Ratchet: I knew they were Zogg and Tachyon
Ratchet crawls back down into the ship and takes a nap.
The roof is silent.
Dr.Nefarious: what the fuck.
Ratchet isn't done being high but after he woke up he came down a bit.
This information is so you yourself don't also go "what the fuck."
Area 4: Small ship End
Area 5: Apogee Space Station
Ratchet and Dr.Nefarious arrive at the Space station after hijacking Zogg and Tachyon's ship.
After the long annoying walk (and the carry of Ratchet) to Talwyn's front door, Ratchet asks his final question.
Ratchet: Hey Nefarious, why do you hate organics anyway?
Nefarious, annoyed, and tired but relieved the questions are over, answers Ratchet
Dr.Nefarious: Well after I "died", I eventually went grocery shopping and someone compared my intelligence to a toaster because I took too long to gather my coupons, and after that, I started noticing more subtle things organics say about robots and it just progressed from there.
Ratchet: huh
Dr.Nefarious rings the doorbell and waits
Talwyn: coming!
The door opens and Talwyn stares at the 2 completely confused.
Dr.Nefarious: here, he's your problem now
He drops Ratchet into Talwyn's arms
Talwyn: What… What were you doing with him?
Dr.Nefarious: I didn't turn him into a bomb, I'm not doing a Bjork.
Talwyn: Who's Bjork???
Dr.Nefarious walks off and tossed his crappy torn shirt at Talwyn's face.
Talwyn: ack- oh damn this is itchy.
As Nefarious walked off, Talwyn closed her door when she did. Dr.Nefarious realized that question was directly aimed at him and not a cartoon skeleton. He turned around but the door was already closed and there was no point in pursuing it.
Talwyn put Ratchet (and the shirt) on the nearest chair and checked him.
Talwyn: Ratchet, Ratchet are you up?
Ratchet: huh? Talwyn!
Talwyn: Wow, your eyes are red, wait... Did you do weed???
Ratchet: how'd you guess?
Talwyn: I made a bet with Clank on whether or not you would eventually try weed.
Ratchet: Did you win?
Talwyn: …
She didn't want to tell Ratchet she fully believed that he would end up trying weed, so she dodges the question.
Talwyn: Anyways, how did you even find weed?
Ratchet: I can't remember.
Talwyn: That's fine, I'm just glad you're not a bomb or whatever he was talking about. I'm going to go get you some water so just stay right there alright!
Ratchet gives a thumbs up and Talwyn leaves the room.
Ratchet turns his head around and sees the dimensionator in the middle of the room since Talwyn was entrusted with it. The dimensionator is very glowy, so glowy as if it were calling out to him to poke it.
Ratchet goes to poke it.
His walk is wobbly but he gets there and. Suddenly he's falling, then he crashes through a roof and lands on someone's bed.
Rivet: hey Ratchet
Ratchet: hey Rivet… That hurt.
Rivet looks around all shifty like and when she is done she puts her hand to her mouth like she's going to whisper.
Rivet: Hey, do you wanna know a secret?
Ratchet: sure
Rivet: I'm high as fuck right now.
ON THE NEXT CHAPTER OF BROWN TOWN
- I REFERENCE A SHOW I'VE NEVER SEEN
- IT CONTINUES CLANK & QWARKS STORY
- AND I USE A CHARACTER THAT I WONDERED "HUH HOW'S THAT GUY DOING" BECAUSE IF COURTNEY GEARS GETS TO SURVIVE HER MURDER THEN THAT GUY CAN TOO!!!
READY YOUR PANTS BECAUSE THEY'RE ABOUT TO BE BROWNED, with brownies to be specific I can't make you poop yourself I would if I knew the brown note though.