Chapter Text
"Was that your stomach?" Maya mumbled. For the last four hours she had just been cuddled up to Carina as her fever raged and her stomach twisted uncomfortably. The sun had even started to set outside, the light from golden hour had been streaming in for at least half an hour, however the blonde hadn't been able to enjoy it, as it was worsening the headache that had appeared. Instead she had burrowed further into Carina who was reading quietly, gently stroking her hair every so often.
"Sì," Carina pressed a kiss to her wife's forehead, despairing at the amount of heat radiating from it.
Maya shifted more onto her side with a groan before putting her hand on Carina's stomach, the brunette hadn't changed out of her bikini yet. "Is it sick or hungry?" She moved her thumb up and down rhythmically.
"Its hungry," Carina admitted with a small laugh, "for the first time in days. Except now you're sick," Maya could literally hear the pout in Carina's voice. "I'm gonna shower and then food. Will you be okay?"
"Mmhmm." Maya reluctantly moved off her, smiling when Carina kissed her forehead and then nuzzled her nose against Maya's.
"I love you," she whispered, lips back on Maya's temple.
"I love you too."
"Allora," Carina stood, as her stomach rumbled again, cheering Maya up just a little.
"Your stomach is the third wheel on this relationship," she joked, poking Carina's stomach as her wife stretched next to her.
"Sì, can I get you anything?" Carina kissed her forehead again, concious that Maya needed just a little bit more love when she was sick. Though Maya hadn't explicitly told her, she had guessed that Lane wasn't particularly easy on her when she was sick growing up. This was evident in Maya's struggle to slow down when she was ill. Or the way even when she was unwell she would check up on Carina. Today it had been in Maya's insistence that she was only boat sick and Carina's sickness brought on by choppy waters.
"Something for my head."
"How do the Americans say it? I'll see what I can doing?"
"Do."
"I'll see what I can do, Bambina." Carina returned with a folded up, dampened wash cloth to cool her fever and soothe her headache. Maya appeared to be asleep, low heavy breaths coming from slightly parted, pale lips. Carina gently laid it on her head and rushed back to the bathroom wanting to shower and eat as fast as possible, with any luck Maya would sleep for a while.
Carina's shower was interupted by a stumbling in Maya, as she was about to rinse the shampoo from her hair.
"Are you okay bambina?" It was all she could do as she tried to rapidly wash all of the suds out of her hair.
"I'm being sick," Maya coughed out.
"Deep breaths." Carina hurriedly turned off the shower, pulled on a robe and stepped out of the shower.
Maya could only be described as hugging the toilet. Her arms were all the way around the toilet, her face all but in the bowl.
"Ooh bambina," Carina rubbed her back, "it's okay." There were a few more splutters, coughs and gags before Maya resurfaced. If there was any colour in Maya's face earlier it had all gone to be replaced by a grey-green hue. Carina grabbed one of the glasses they stocked in the bathroom and filled it up, holding Maya at arms length so she didn't get wet. "sciacquarti your mouth, then sips."
"'M okay."
"Sì, I know," she used her finger to push the hairs that has stuck to Maya's forehead with sweat to one side, "come on," she took Maya's hand and pulled her back to the bed. "Rest, try to sleep. I love you," another kiss to the forehead. She crossed the room in the opposite direction and closed the curtains, blocking out the almost entirely set sun. She flicked on a light, teased Maya's scalp once more, ensured the bucket was by her head and walked back to the bathroom.
Carina kept the bathroom door open as she finished showering, trying to listen out for Maya needing something. She had had very sore stomach's after each bout of sickness which had almost incapacitated her so she wanted to be available to help if she needed anything. Once she had showered she hurried with her skincare not hearing a peep out of Maya who she assumed had fallen back to sleep. The bed was just out of her eye line.
Softly padding back to the bedroom, Carina had planned to quickly hurry on some clothes, dry her hair and walk for a bowl of pasta from the restaurant downstairs. However Maya had other plans, making the doctor jump out of her skin for one. Where she should have been in bed she was stood up, leaning against it instead, dressed, not in the cotton pyjama shorts and vest top that Carina had changed her into after she was sick two hours earlier. Instead she was in the outfit she had worn on the flight over; a pair of joggers and a hoodie. "What are you doing, bambina?" Carina asked clutching her chest.
"Would a hoodie be okay for the restaurant?"
"Maya, you're not going for food," she walked over, "you look very dizzy," she could see her wife trying to get her eyes to focus as she swayed slightly, "sit down," she walked Maya back a little more.
"I feel better," Maya insisted, as Carina's hand settled on her forehead, which was radiating out masses of heat and was definitely up again.
"You don't have stomach ache?" Carina gently forced her to lie back and lifted up her hoodie, finding a t-shirt under there. She lifted this and laid a hand on gently, holding in a sigh as Maya flinched a little. "You just need to rest. Give your pancia time, okay? It's okay to rest." Carina pulled her hand back, twisting her girlfriend fully onto the bed. She pulled her up for a moment to remove the hoodie, which was doing more harm than good.
"I don't want to," she heard through a sniff, "I can't."
"You can, bambina, you've done really well so far, and I'm sure you're feeling horrible and tired because I was. I'll stay with you, sì?"
"I'm sorry for crying."
"Hey, that's normal," Carina cupped her cheek, "you feel sick. It's okay to be emotional. To cry. You're still my big strong wife even if you rest and cry. In fact," she moved to nuzzle her nose against Maya's cheek, "it makes you even stronger."
"You need to eat though."
"I'm going to get room service, is that okay? I'll eat on the balcony so you won't feel more sick with food smells. Then I can keep an eye on you."
"Okay."
"Good," Carina abandoned drying her hair and getting dressed, climbing into bed. She patted her lap and Maya moved her head onto it, rolling onto her side. As she used the phone, Carina combed Maya's hair sweetly. Much to her relief her wife fell asleep quickly. She swapped her lap for a pillow and was just changed when the door knocked. She glanced over at Maya as she went to answer, relieved she had stayed asleep.
"Ciao, puoi metterlo sul balcone?" She said lowly to the hotel staff. They nodded and carried it through to the large balcony for her. Carina took the 7up she had ordered and put it in the cool box, a treat for when Maya was starting to feel better and would need both a mood and energy boost. She kept both balcony doors open and positioned herself so she could see Maya, who she was relieved to see stay fast asleep the entire meal.
Carina promptly got into bed after she had finished eating, only half the meal, as her appetite had disappeared again. If she was honest with herself, she too was exhausted. It was definitely a combination of things that let her fall asleep, with her own personal radiator, Maya, before it had even turned 9pm. Being ill herself only three days ago and now looking after Maya was probably the biggest contender, followed by jet lag. They had also got up early to get the boat keys and walk around the market.
"Okay?" Carina asked tiredly into the top of Maya's head. Her wife had just rolled over and groaned loudly, burying her face into Carina's chest.
Maya shook her head, "my tummy hurts." She shifted again, lying on her back. "Its big isn't it," she pulled up her top.
"Sì, its bloated."
Maya groaned, rolled onto her side again then back onto ber back. She just wanted some relief from it but no position seemed to be helping and the rolling was making her feel dizzy. She sighed, hand on her stomach, pressing in where it was hurting in an attempt at some relief. "That was bad," she said and coughed, rolling back over, reaching for the bucket. "I've got it," Carina took it from her and held it by her face, the blonde still lying down. This was probably the sickest Maya had been since the boat. Every time she thought it was done her stomach would squeeze, she would wretch and more would come up. Eventually it was just bile, burning worse than ever as it came up. After almost fourty minutes she finally laid on her back, shivering, covered in a sheen of sweat, both pale and flushed. The nausea she was experiencing was horrendous and nearly had her back on her side with the bucket. But deep breaths seemed to be helping dispell it a little.
"What happened then?" Carina asked climbing over her to dispose of the bag from the bucket.
"I found a sick button," Maya croaked, her voice gone.
"Huh?"
"I pressed where it was hurting in my stomach and then I couldn't stop being sick."
"Sì?"
"I'm sorry."
"You can't help it," Carina said, "are you in pain?"
"Mmm."
"I don't want to give you paracetamol until your tummy settles. Sip some water first and if it stays put in an hour I can give you some."
"Okay."
"And you're just too warm to have a hot water bottle," she had her hand on Maya's chest, for a more accurate ideq of the fever. She lifted it off and lightly pinched her chin, "you look very cute, even though you're not feeling good," she said, "you have cute little rosy cheeks and as you know, I love your nose. And sleepy Maya is my favourite, and I think you're definitely looking a little sleepy." She traced down Maya's nose which always made her fall asleep at home. This made her smile, as it was how she used to put Andrea to sleep when he was little and now it worked on her wife. "Go to sleep," she kissed her lips, "just rest, Bella."
Once Maya was asleep Carina could address her own problem, which was that from about halfway through Maya's sick episode she had started to sweat and feel sick herself. That was added to a stomach ache that had come on when she had stood to make her feel like maybe she wasn't one hundred percent recovered. She had left the bucket to deal with but unfortunately it ended up being the trigger that had her leaning over the sink being sick. She prayed she wasn't being too loud as the last thing she needed was Maya worrying but of course the blonde heard her and shuffling feet appeared as she was straightening up. "I'm okay, Mai," she reassured, feeling a lot better. She was now able to deal with the bucket flushing the contents and changing the bag, putting the other in the bin. Maya just watched her, holding her own stomach, shivering in the middle of the bathroom.
"Are you still sick?"
"I don't think so," Carina grabbed the thermometer pointing it at her head, happy when it read normal, "you are though, 39.2 so 102.5."
"I know I'm sick now," Maya mumbled, "can you come to bed?"
"I'm gonna wash my teeth."
"Me too," Maya leaned on her as they brushed their teeth, Carina turning to hug her once she had spit it out.
"My tummy's settling." They were back in bed, the cold cloth on Maya's stomach, in an effort to bring the fever down and offer a different sensation for her to focus on.
"Good, mine too, I'm not sure what happened there."
"Was it me being sick?"
"I don't know."
"I'm sorry."
"Stop talking, your voice sounds horrible, just sleep, cuddle up, that's it," she smiled when Maya nuzzled in, "wake me up if you don't feel well."
"I think, if I don't eat, I could go," Maya's voice was hoarse and barely above a whisper. She had been watching Carina get ready for a family party for the last half an hour. The sickness had stopped after the last episode but she had spent the day between sleep and almost writhing in discomfort from the cramps in her stomach and the headache that just wouldn't leave. For most of the day it had felt double the size or like something was clawing to get out. It had subdued significantly with pain killers and cold cloths and she actually didn't feel too bad now.
Carina's aunt was hosting most of her Mamma's family and a few members of her Papà's up in the little mountain village Carina had majority grown up in until her Mom and Andrew had left. The Italian had almost forgotten about it until her Cousin had called offering them a ride.
"And I," Carina sighed, perching on the side of Maya's bed, "really want you to feel better for tomorrow. I think, if you sit this one out, you will feel a lot better."
"I want to meet your family though."
"We can see them when you feel better. Plus you've met the important ones, Zia is my most important relative. My Mamma's sister."
"Will you tell them I really wanted to come but I'm just super sick."
"You're not super sick, you're regular sick but yes, I will."
Maya nodded and shifted a little, finding a comfortable position. She was trying really hard to let herself be. To not push to hard. Kissing Carina goodbye she settled in for a night of TV she couldn't understand and some plain rice and a banana Carina had ordered her just before she left.
Unfortunately being left alone when you're no good at being sick isn't very ideal. After trying to eat she had started to feel sick and then eventually was sick. As she curled up on the bathroom floor, feeling dizzy and sorry for herself she had an awful flashback.
She was fourteen years old; state youth champion and running obsessed. She was one of those who the phrase 'eat, sleep, run' applied heavily. Particularly as her Dad strictly enforced this mentality. "Winners don't taketime off", was one of his favourtite reminders he'd say to Maya on days where she would struggle to get up, or complain. This was one of those phrases that fit the 'eyes forward at all times' mindset. Nothing was worth skipping practice for; adversity only made you stronger.
So, developing a raging temperature and a tummy ache was somethng that induced disappointment and a little fear in her. It had started at diner time, or just before, when she was supposed to be doing homework. She had just come back from a run and sat on her bed when her stomach had started hurting. Worse than it had in her memory. Thinking her period had started early she had gone to the bathroom but there was no blood. Then she had noticed how cold she felt and had returned to her room and wrapped up in bed hoping her Dad wouldn't walk past and scold her. As she had sat there shivering the worry had grown, the regional championship was soon and so she was on a seven days a week schedule. She would have to run the next day and right now she didn't feel at all well. Also she couldn't afford to fall behind in school too, feeling so ill, as good grades were the gateway to good universities.
Admittedly she had tried to do her homework from under the covers but it was math and she wasn't good at this when she was feeling well so she definitly wouldn't be able to feeling so awful.
When her mom had called her down to dinner she had peeled herself from the warm covers and pulled on a jumper before slowly making her way down, knowing if she asked to skip dinner shouting would most likely ensue. So she had sat down at the table, in her place, with Mason across from her, her Dad next to her at the head of the table and her Mom on her other side. She kept one hand on her stomach as she waited for her plate, willing it to stop hurting long enough for her to eat dinner and get an early night. Of course it didn't and when the chicken rice and broccoli, that was always friday tea for Maya, was placed in front of her her tummy lurched uncomfortably and there was now nausea to go with her other symptoms. She had tried to pick at the food and eat small bites but when her dad, with his ribs and mash potato, had told her to stop playing with her food she had been forced to shovel it in and deal with it.
And deal with it she did. Whilst her mom and dad watched TV downstairs and Mason played on the SEGA in the basement she curled up on the bathroom floor, door locked, and tried to throw up as quietly as possible. When she had heard her parents tell Mason to go to bed, and the sound of a whiskey glass hit the coffee table she had sprayed the room with everything that smelled nice and went to bed, the trash can hdden under the covers. She heard her Dad pause at her bedroom door and the various movings of night routines before her parent's bedroom door closed and the house became silent.
She had slept mostly in the bathroom that night, her parents had an en suite and it was far enough away that if she was quiet and ran the tap they wouldn't hear anything. Mason had found her at 2am and set up camp silently next to her, bringing his battery alarm clock in so they knew when to go back to their rooms. He had only been 10 but had patted her back and run the tap whenever the sickness gripped her. Understanding completely.
By morning, well 430 on Mason's clock, Maya had had a collective 2 hours of broken sleep and had been sick at least ten times.
Unfortunately, yet predictably, Maya was difficult to rouse when it was time to run. Lane saw the pale face and bin on the floor but still went to get the bucket and the cold water. Winners don't get sick. Winners aren't lazy.
It had scared Maya, sent her straight up into a sitting position and then foced bile out onto her bed clothes. She had held in her cries as he shoved her forcefully and bellowed "Get your act together young lady, before we run."' he had said and then stormed out, leaving Maya soaked, shivering and covered in sick.
Even looking back Maya wasn't sure how she had managed to get out of bed let alone wash her duvet cover, shower and meet her Dad for the run in under fifteen minutes.
The run had been disasterous. Her upset stomach had her leaning into bushes on the trail every mile until she physically collapsed next to her Dad on the bike who had promised her she wouldn't fnish running until she did a mile without being sick. He hadn't stopped, just informed her over his shoulder that she should make her own way home and not talk to him until she was ready to be a winner. "'Winners don't get sick, winners don't do that,"' he had shouted as Maya lay in her own vomit on the pavement for a kind neighour to find her forty minutes later and return her home, where it was just her mom and Mason, her Dad missing. The former had tucked her into bed with a dose of peptobismol and kept her husband off her daughter's back long enough for her to sart to feel better.
She went out running the next day and had gone 15 miles insteaad of ten, swaring to her dad she would never get sick again.
"sei così carina Stellina. È meglio che tua mamma ti tenga d'occhio perché voglio portarti a casa. Oh, qualcuno mi chiama, è Zia Maya, sta male," she held the phone up to her ear, "Ciao Bambina, tutto bene?" [you're so cute Stella. Your mom better keep an eye on you because I want to take you home. Oh, someone's calling me, it's Aunt Maya, she's sick]
"I can't breathe."
"What's happened Maya? What's-"
"Flashback."
"Okay, I'll be back in twenty minutes," Carina handed over Stella back to her mum, "stay on the phone. Talk to me bambina." She turned to her cousin, "puoi chiamarmi un taxi, da Maya, devo tornare?" [can you call me a taxi, it's Maya, I have to get back.]
"Ti accompagno io, è più veloce." [I'll take you, it's faster]
"Grazie, Mai, talk to me."
"I couldn't eat much," she said shakily, as Carina pulled her jacket on and waved apologetically at her family.
"Okay, that's okay, you've not been feeling good."
"But then my stomach was hurting."
"I'm sorry to hear, maybe we were a bit quick with food."
"And I was feeling really sick but I didn't want to be sick. I think that was a bit triggering and then I was and all I could hear was his voice," she sounded so upset, with everything, with herself, "I've been hearing him all day since the boat. But it's been in the background because you were there and I thought I'd be okay alone but he got louder. And then I felt like I was fourteen with rotavurus again. Like I was back and he was calling me weak."
"You're not weak, bambina, I promise," Carina was holding onto the handle above the door as Fabio was driving down the winding mountain roads at probably twice the speed he should have been. "I'm sorry his voice is loud," Carina said gently, "you've done so well to rest and I'm sorry it's all become loud again. I love you."
"I love you too."
"What should we talk about?" She could hear Maya was calming and was keen to keep this going with nonsensical chats.
"What would our baby look like?"
"Allora, I would love our baby to look like a mixture of us. Blue eyes and brown hair seems like a good combination, sì?" Carina asked.
"But they won't be able to. If we use your egg."
"Mmm, but we can pick a donor with similar features to you. My Mamma had blue eyes so it's very possible. Then they would probably have me and Andrea's curly hair. It's cute but hard to tame," Carina smiled, "can you do hair?"
"Ponytails?"
"Ah me too, but I can braid. What about you what do our babies look like to you?"
Carina listened intently as Maya practically described her. The blonde was sounding much calmer with each moment. "And they'll be super smart- I think I'm okay, you don't need to come now. I'm really sorry I called, I'm okay."
"Good, in glad. I'm nearly with you, you know."
"I'm so sorry," and just like that she was back to being worked up, her breathing quickening instantly at the thought of burdening Carina, "I didn't know what to do and I- I'm sorry for being a burden."
"Hey, I'm glad you called. I don't want you to apologise, you've done the right thing. Plus you gave me an out, I'll tell you about it later. Please don't worry about calling me ever, and please don't think you're a burden, you're far from it."
"Hmm."
"Hey, can you do something for me?"
"What?"
"Can you run me a bubble bath. One deep enough for both of us. And also in my case there's face masks, can you pick two, one for you, one for me?"
"Yeah."
"Good."
"Should I drink some of that rehydration stuff?"
"Sì, sips, if you want."
"I do. My tummy's starting to hurt less."
"Well that's great, I'm coming into Catania now, so I'll be five minutes, okay?"
"Okay, I'm sorry."
"Bambina. I'm your wife. I don't mind. Please don't worry. I love you."
"I love you too."
"Good."
"Your dad was there?"
"Uh-huh. He invited himself. And he was not happy." Carina explained. She was gently tracing lines on Maya's stomach under the warm water.
"Why?"
"He thought I was rude for not telling him I was back. But he changed his number after Andrea died. And I had texted him," Carina sighed, "and then after that he said he read my paper and he was embarrassed that his name was on the study."
"His name?"
"As in DeLuca," Carina elaborated, "he was just a complete stronzo. And he made my stomach hurt. So I went to find baby Stella and cuddle her for a while."
"So is he back or something?"
"Sì, I asked my cousing Enrico and he said Papà has bee living in Catania since the pandemic started being less severe. He didn't like Rome anymore and he is slowing down with work."
"Did you tell him about me?" It was shy.
"He already knows all about you," Carina kissed her cheek, "I emailed him the pictures from our wedding and I send him a Christmas Card from us. With pictures usually. He did ask about you, so he knew. I just said you stayed back as you weren't feeling good. He thought I was embarrassed to be married to a woman, but I'm quite the opposite. I am so proud to be your wife and be married to you. And guess what," she had pulled Maya a little closer with each confession.
"What?" Carina could hear the smile on Maya's lips.
"All of my family want to meet you. So on the last day we'll have a big dinner with them in my Nonna and Nonno's old house and you can see mine and Andrea's room. And meet everyone."
"Your dad?"
"If you want to. He is an asshole but he's not so bad. Not, I think, like he is."
"I'm falling asleep," Maya mumbled, after a brief silent spell where Carina had kissed her shoulders a few times, "but my tummy has stopped hurting. And the bath has been really nice."
"You get ready for bed," Carina encouraged her up with a strong hand on her back, "I'm going to quickly wash my hair."
"Thanks for coming to keep me company. And making me feel better."
"That's okay. I love you, a lot. Thanks for rescuing me from a night with my Dad for a surprise."
"That's okay. I love you, a lot."
"Tummies feeling good?"
"Check."
"No body's thrown up in days."
"Check."
"Our parents don't define us?"
"Check."
"Let's go Babe! Time to finally start celebrating our marriage, in Italy!"