Chapter Text
===============
No one could explain it, but Padme was back. They had thought that she had been too weak to recover, but somehow she had survived. The doctors had given her a good prognosis. Anakin informed the Queen and Padme’s family and they had come to see her right away.
While Padme was recovering, Anakin left her side for the first time in days promising to everyone that he would finally get some rest. He did rest, but most of the time he was too caught up in his thoughts, which had been on Padme and the last few days. She was supposed to die, but he had used the force to keep her alive…something that he hadn’t been able to do with his mother. And now he was convinced that his love for her with the force had somehow made him finally realize his full potential.
He had never loved anyone as strongly as he now loved Padme…not even his mother when he thought about it. Could this kind of love really make him do the impossible? If she could make him that powerful, he knew that he never wanted to be without her. He realized that it might seem selfish of him if she didn’t feel the same way, but at least she did love him. If he had to, he would spend the rest of his life proving it to her.
But Anakin wondered what he was really asking of her? Surely an open relationship with Padme would be impossible in the eyes of the Jedi and Senate. She would remind him of that and try her best to refuse him, he knew, but he had to try. Somewhere along the line, she had become the best thing that had ever happened to him.
He wondered if she felt the same way. Would she be willing to break all the rules to pursue this love between them? He would in a minute, but he knew what serving in the Senate meant to Padme. She would never knowingly do anything to disappoint her people or their trust in her.
If she objected, he would have to move on. But he felt that if she loved him as much as he loved her, that he could convince her in time. He would give her a break for a while when he returned to complete his training, but he would see her again and he would make sure it was often. He was not going to make it easy on her at all. He would pursue her until she gave in if he had to.
That was it. Anakin got up…his rest was over, he needed to see her and settle this once and for all so that he could decide on what to do next. He didn’t have a lot of time. Two days ago, Obi-Wan had summoned him back to Coruscant, but after learning of Padme’s condition he had allowed him to stay longer. But now that she was recovering, Anakin knew that he would have to return soon.
=================
When Anakin returned to the palace’s medical center, Padme was awake and sitting up in bed. She seemed surprised to see him.
“Anakin, what are you doing here? My mom said that you had gone to get some rest.”
“I was resting…but I’ve slept enough for now” Anakin said as he knelt down and kissed her tenderly.
She broke the kiss sooner than he wanted to so he sat down in the chair next to her bed and tenderly caressed her hair, moving it out of her face.
“Are you feeling any better? You gave us all a good scare, you know.” Padme just nodded and raised her shoulders in apology.
“Where are your parents?”
“They went home, finally. I hate it when they fuss over me. They will be returning tomorrow. I can’t wait to go home and sleep in my own bed again.”
Anakin took a deep breath and settled himself in the chair right next to her bed. Then he grabbed her hand, “Padme, I have orders to return to Coruscant in a week and I want…”
She interrupted him, “…I know, you want to know where we go from here.” Anakin nodded. “It’s all I’ve been able to think about. But I don’t know what to say.”
“How about telling me that you love me again,” said Anakin.
“Oh, Ani, I do love you, I can’t deny that now…but nothing has changed. I’m still a Senator and you’re still training to be a Jedi.”
“I know, I’ve been thinking about that, and I know what you are saying is right, but everything in me is telling me that we will only make things worse if we try to deny our feelings.”
“What are you saying, Anakin? Are you willing to disobey the Jedi Order after all you’ve worked for? They could expel you!” She reached over and caressed the side of his face, “I told you, I won’t let you do that for me.”
“Padme, I’d do anything for you. I told you before…I don’t agree with everything in the code anyway. “I think a love like ours should be encouraged, not forbidden. I’d leave the Jedi order if that’s what it came to.”
“But Anakin, you were meant to be a Jedi. With your power, there’s no limit to the amount of people that you can help serving the Jedi. I know you have always been powerful, but the Jedi are the ones who have helped you perfect those skills and give them purpose…which in return has made you who you are today.”
“But it is you that brings out the best in me, Padme. Before you came back into my life, I felt like a part of me had been missing. I found that in you. And when I thought I was going to lose you, that made me realize that I can’t live without you.”
“Anakin.” Padme couldn’t believe what she was hearing.
“You’ve given me a greater purpose now…even greater than serving the Jedi Order. I’ve seen people in love before and what we have pales in comparison. I want to be with you, Padme.
Padme objected, “Anakin, I do love you, but I can’t just ignore my oath and duties to the Senate…especially now that this war has begun. On the other hand, you seem almost too eager to disobey the Jedi right now. I thought you said you were ready for the trials…that Obi-Wan was holding you back? Is becoming a Jedi no longer of importance to you now?”
Anakin paused to think a moment, “Of course it is. But the Jedi order is strict....they won’t support our attachment…unless they don’t know about it.”
“Anakin, we’ve already talked about this…”
“…Look, I know it might be hard at first…keeping it a secret, but I promise you, it won’t have to be forever.”
Padme looked confused, “I don’t understand.”
“We love each other, I’m ready for the trials, and the galaxy is in a state of war. It couldn’t be a more perfect time for the Jedi Counsel to start making some changes. I think I could get them to make an exception eventually. After all, they need me, especially after losing so many at the battle on Geonosis.”
“So we just go on with our separate duties and keep our relationship a secret? We can’t hide it forever, Anakin. They will eventually find out. And what then? Even if the Jedi do allow us to be together? What about the Senate? I will no longer be able to serve after such a scandal, and I’m needed now more than ever. Honestly, Anakin, I love you, but I don’t know what you want from me.”
Anakin took a deep breath, “I want you to be my wife.” There, he’d said it. “Marry me, Padme?”
Padme was shocked. Soon her eyes begin to tear up because as much as she had dreamed about hearing those words one day; she had never imagined these circumstances. She had no idea he was even close to proposing such a thing and realized that he hadn’t exactly planned on asking her either since he did not have a ring to offer her. She smiled slightly at that thought before saying, “Anakin, I can’t believe...do you know what you’re asking of me?”
“I know, and I don’t care. I love you, Padme and I want to spend the rest of my life with you…as a Jedi or not. I will not ask you to leave the Senate, but if we are married then, at least, you will be able to continue serving if they were to find out about us. They can’t really call it a scandal sneaking around with your own husband now can they? Padme just sat there staring at him speechless.
“Listen to me…I have a plan. I will take full responsibility with the Jedi Order when the time comes. I will tell them of our marriage once I am a Master, and they will either expel me or make an exception.
We will make the announcement and it will be too late for the Jedi to stop us. They will have to make an exception or expel me from the order.”
“I told you, I won’t let you ruin your career for me.”
“I won’t be ruining it, I promise. I will be a Jedi, Padme. We will keep it secret only until then. If I’m expelled, don’t worry, I have plans either way. Palpatine has already promised me a position with or without the Jedi Order behind me. He’s more supportive of me these days anyway. Maybe serving the Republic that way is my destiny.
Padme could only look skeptical but Anakin could tell that she was still considering his offer.
“So all you have to say now is yes.”
“I don’t know about this, Ani. There are other things to consider...like my family, I don’t want to keep them in the dark. They would be expecting a full marriage ceremony here on Naboo and I’m not sure they would understand our need to keep it a secret.
“I’ve been thinking. You being a Senator has advantages you know. You often need to be discrete, especially with the recent threats against you. No one would think it strange if you went into seclusion again from time to time. We could meet and be together. When you’re on Coruscant, I could meet with you often and no one would think it odd now after all we’ve been through. I’m ready for the trials, it won’t be long before I am a Jedi and Palpatine has already offered me a position working closely with the Galactic Republic.”
“I don’t like having to keep us a secret.”
“I know, but I promise you, we will figure out a way to make it work. Just say yes and I will dedicate my life to you.” Anakin got up and started pacing.
Padme could only nod. She sat back in bed now emotionally exhausted. She felt like she was making the hardest decision of her life. Normally she would be able to consult with her parents or someone else first. But here she was having to make a life changing decision on her own. As a young teenager, she had been entrusted as Queen to make important decisions before, but there was always a counsel to discuss things with first. And no decision she ever made felt quite like this before.
But as much as she would like to involve her parents, she was a woman now and everyone expected her to be able to make her own decisions. This decision would have to come from her heart. She thought back to when she thought they were about to die, when she admitted to him that she loved him for the first time. At that time she had regretted waiting to tell him and felt that they had missed out on the small amount of happiness that they could have enjoyed before their deaths.
She felt like what they had was true love and she knew, for some people, that never came. She realized that she didn’t want to lose him. She always had a feeling that she would never live to be old and grey because of the dangers of her work, and Anakin’s career choice was even more so dangerous than hers, so why not enjoy some happiness while they could?
If she refused him, she risked the possibility of never seeing him again, either because of his anger or broken heart or because of his Jedi duties and/or the impeding war.
Padme took his hand in hers, “I do love you Anakin...”
He nodded his head patiently awaiting her answer.
“Yes...yes Ani. I will marry you.”
Anakin smiled the biggest smile ever and pulled her into a hug. As Padme gave into the hug, she wasn’t sure if her tears where of joy or pain because somehow she knew their happiness would not last. She made a promise to herself that she would try to enjoy the good times from now on.
THE END.