Chapter Text
Sirius and Remus were up in the Gryffindorm. Together. Alone. Alone, together.
It was a Saturday, and Professor McGonagall was taking a group of students to Hogsmeade. Luckily Remus asked her at the first chance if him and some of his friends could go, before all the available places got taken, so Remus and the Gryffindorm boys were going.
Naturally, Sirius was taking millennia to get dressed. When Peter had complained Sirius had just yelled.
"PETTIGREW, IF NO ONE TAKES ONE LOOK AT ME AND THINKS IMMEDIATELY THAT I AM A PROBLEM CHILD, I HAVE FAILED AS A HUMAN BEING!"
James and Peter ended up going ahead. So, it was just Remus and Sirius. Sirius and Remus. Together. Sirius slapped himself on the cheek. Stop being weird, he thought, get dressed, look hot, maybe snag the boy while you're at it- Sirius slapped himself again.
"You... Ok?" Asked a very worried Sirius.
"Uh, yep, yeah, just looking too pale. The classic slap your cheeks so they look pink." Sirius turned away from Remus, taking off his grey school shirt.
"Why did you slap the same cheek twice then?"
Sirius just stopped talking. He attempted to change the subject.
"Excited for Hogsmeade? I haven't had butter beer in like, half a year." Sirius buttoned up his shirt, fixing up the stiff white collar.
Remus just let the conversation change course.
"Not a big butter beer person, really. I prefer the soups they make at the Leaky Cauldron. Their cheese jaffles are to DIE for."
Sirius chuckled. "I'll make sure to try it. Hey, could you please pass me those cufflinks?" He pointed to two silver cufflinks, resting on the nightstand.
Remus walked over to them. "Do you always dress up this much when you go out?"
Maybe it was because he was distracted by his conversation with Sirius. Maybe it was because he was so looking forward to that Leaky Cauldron soup of the day. Maybe it was because he felt comfortable enough around Sirius that it happened. He left his guard down.
He picked up the cufflinks, hot shooting pain going through his fingers and up his arm.
"Fuuuuuhhhhhrrcck!" He swore between bared teeth. He dropped the cufflinks on the floor and grabbed his right wrist, as if applying pressure would help. His knees betrayed him, and he fell onto the ground, hunched over like a toad.
"Shit, shit, Remus are you ok?" Sirius rushed over and the gravity of the situation finally hit Remus.
"Yep!" He said, in the cheeriest voice he could muster. He looked up at Sirius who towered over him and summoned a weak smile.
Sirius was unconvinced.
Remus stood up.
"Show me."
"Pardon?"
"Show me your hand."
"Sirius, don't worry about it, it's fine."
Sirius looked up at him. "Show. Me." He said sternly.
Reluctantly, Remus lifted his right hand, red lines of irritation stemming from what looks like a cigarette burn.
"Why did that happen?" The stern voice continued.
Remus attempted to play the fool. "I have no idea, never happened before." He never had been good at lying.
No stern voice this time, just Sirius lifting his hands, tracing the burn and watching Remus's face intently. As Sirius's fingers nicked the main burned surface, it took all of Remus's willpower to not flinch.
Sirius took a step forward towards Remus, and Remus stepped back.
"Remus, I'm not an idiot. Why did my silver cufflinks burn you as if it were fire?"
"If you aren't an idiot, why do you need me to tell you?" Remus muttered.
Remus had never told anyone about his lycanthropy except his mum. She told everyone else who was on a need-to-know basis, like Remus's dad or the school staff.
"Because if you say it, then the others will think you were always going to tell us." The stern edge to Sirius's voice was still there, but there was something else too.
Remus hadn't had to tell people about his lycanthropy for a decade. Part of him wanted to keep that streak.
He said nothing.
"Remus."
Still nothing. There were words bubbling out into Remus's mouth, before fizzling out.
Sirius slammed a hand onto the wall, trapping Remus.
"Sirius... I..." Remus gulped. On one hand, this was vaguely traumatic, being pressured into spilling his darkest secret like this. But on the other, Remus couldn't help feeling a little bit warm in the cheeks. The duality of man.
Sirius raised an eyebrow.
"Sirius, I'm a werewolf, have been for 10 years." Then it all just came spilling out. "Barely anyone knows because I know about the stigmas to do with it all. And I promise I have never hurt anyone. Ever." Each sentence spilt out of his chest faster and faster. "The school knows that's why I disappear sometimes for a day or two, not because of my mum but because Slughorn needs time to brew." He felt like he might cry. "And you are the only person other than my mum who I've told and I- I-"
Remus was cut off by a hug. Sirius was hugging him. It was only then he felt the warm, salty tears on his face.
"Shit... Sorry-"
"Don't you dare fucking apologize. You're alright." Sirius said softly, his face buried in Remus's jumper. "I promise not to tell."
Remus hugged him back as well as he could with his arms pinned to his side. Sirius's hair smelt nice.
"Thank you" Remus whispered.
Remus and Sirius were just on time for the trip to Hogsmead. They ran up just as Professor McGonagall was taking attendance, as per policy.
"What took you a year?" Peter hissed at them in a hushed voice.
"Sirius and his damn cufflinks." Remus replied, whispering.
"Oi, if you hadn't lost one, we would have been early." Sirius said loudly.
"Silence, please, Mr. Black." Professor McGonagall called.
Remus gave Sirius a look, and that was the end of that.
They walked as a group down the winding path through the tall pine trees. It was about three in the afternoon, and they were allowed out till 10. Seven hours for food and friends. And pranks, if you're James. Peter and Remus were discussing Headmaster Dumbledore's recent change in fashion, straying from clean suits and gravitating towards emerald robes adorned with intricately embroidered violets. James and Sirius were walking side-by-side, saying nothing.
"Can we stop at the Leaky Cauldron?" Sirius piped up, still staring ahead.
"Sure, why?" James asked.
"A bet."
"Oooh, what about and with who?"
"Jaffles."
"With who?"
"No one in particular."
"Uh-huh." James articulated slowly, not believing a word of it. "So, what do you think of Remus?"
"He's cool."
James opened his mouth as if he were to say something, before shutting it.
Peter turned to Sirius. "Don't you think so, Sirius?"
"Sorry what?"
"He wouldn't wear sequins, that's too much, even for Dumbledore."
"Peter, you are glossing over the fact that at this rate, he will be covered in diamonds by the end of the year. And you know what, good for him. Although I think that ferns would have looked nicer than violets." Remus looked over Peters head and at James and Sirius.
"Nah, yellow poppies. Match his eyes."
"His eyes are blue, Peter." Remus stated, bluntly.
Peter shrugged.
When the Gryfindors come down to Hogsmeade, their usual trip consists of butter beer and being a band of menaces. This time of year they would charm snowballs to fly around until they found an open windows, then find and hit a human target, but the snow was grey, slushy and useless.
So butter beer it was.
They found an empty booth at the Leaky Cauldron and squeezed in. It was so squishy because on the way down Marlene appeared, and insisted that she and her friends join them. James and Peter were down the far end, facing each other. Next to James was Marlene, then Remus and Lily was on the end. Next to Peter was Sirius and then Mary.
The booth was not made for 7 fifteen year olds.
Remus felt very awkward. He was very much squished. James wasn't particularly tall, but he was chunky, and him and Marlene, muscular from quidditch practices, took up most of the room.
"It's Remus, right?" Came a voice from beside him. It was Lily, the short red head.
"Uh, yes, Lily Evans, right?"
She laughed. Remus didn't quite understand why. "Sorry, um, I saw your name down for Octavia's book club thing. You're doing Frankenstein right?"
"Oh! Yeah, I read it a year or so ago, and if you get over the 'ye olde' writing style, it's really interesting."
"It's sort if romantic, don't you think? I've read it too and there was just something so intriguing about the end, how the monster grieves the death of-"
James spoke up, interrupting her. "Careful guys, we put the book nerds together, we will never have a moment of peace."
"Oh shut up, James, you're just jealous that I've won Remus over with my friendly charm and endless wit." Lily fired back.
"Challenge accepted, Lilith Evanston, by the end of today, Remus will be my best friend and you will be left in the dust."
At that Sirius and Peter gave James a look of 'what about me, asshole?'.
"I wasn't challenging you and please don't call me that." She tucked some of her long hair behind her ear. "But if Remus was going to pick one of us, it's going to be me."
James scoffed. "Remus who do you prefer?"
Remus, who was feeling quite uncomfortable from the situation, just stalled. "Well, I only just properly met Lily, so it's not fair."
"OK, as much as I love watching you both fight, I came here to spend time with my girlfriend, so for the love of Merlin, stop." Mary spoke up, getting annoyed about the back and forth
"Wait you and Marlene are dating?" James joked, and got a paper coaster thrown at him. Hard.
The drinks that they had ordered before sitting down arrived. Butter beers for Marlene, James and Sirus, lemonade for Lily and Peter and lemon lime bitters for Remus and Mary.
"Peter, keep the bottle." James ordered between sips of a foamy golden liquid.
"Hm?"
"We can play truth or dare with that."
Lily and Mary groaned.
"We aren't playing unless Sirius is banned from taking dares."
There were a few protests from Sirius at that, but it soon dissolved into joining in the now pleasant conversation. They were having a great time.
Until Severus walked over, wearing the scowl he uses so often, Sirius would joke that if the wind changed his face would be stuck.
"You need to leave." He snapped.
"Why? This fine establishment hasn't requested we go, what makes you think you have the authority?" James fired back.
"You are all so loud. It's obnoxious." Severus crossed his arms.
Peter jumped in. "Snape, I don't think you know how public places work."
Severus looked at Lily and Remus and glared. "I expected more from both of you than hanging around this..." he paused trying to find an insult that wasn't a flat-out slur. "Gaggle of people who were dropped as children."
"Good thing I don't need your approval then, Sev." Lily's voice was dry and hostile, but her face remained as calm as it usually was.
Critical hit. Severus stormed off, his hair shining from the grease under the candlelight as he went across the room to an empty booth.
It took a minute to recover the vibe of the meet after Severus tried to sink it. Lily and Remus started comparing muggle lives, Peter and Mary discussed books from their childhoods, well they tried, talking over Sirius's head, and Sirius, Marlene and James strategized for the next game night.
"Speaking of game night, hey Remus? You are invited to possibly the most prestigious collection of games and competition." James put on that posh voice again.
"Uh," Remus thought. "Sure, I don't know if I can't commit to every session, but I'd love to. What kind of games do you play?"
"That's fine, we play magic card games, so things like Blunder, Pairs of Pears, Lies get Prides, occasionally Devil's Dice, depends on how many people play." James counted the games on his fingers as he listed them.
Remus bluescreened. "I'm just going to pretend I know what those are."
"Blunders is sort of like poker and is about bluffing and betting. Pairs of Pears is go fish but with cards that change, different coloured cards swap values more often so that keeps things interesting. Lies get Prides is a lion inspired version of checkers." Lily spoke quickly as if this wasn't the first time she'd had to explain them. "And Devil's dice-"
Remus cut her off. "Is that the one with three six-sided dice against one?"
Lily nodded and finished her drink. "We meet every two weeks if more than 6 people can make it."
"Sometimes we get Lily's parents to send us muggle snacks we get to try, like have you ever had a Jaffa cake, Remus?" Sirius joined in.
"Sirius, I'm half muggle, of course I've had a Jaffa cake." Remus smiled and turned his lemon lime bitters bottle on its side and started spinning it absent mindedly.
"Hey" Mary spoke up. "If you guys finish your drinks we can head back to school and play truth and dare, spin the bottle version."
James and Marlene chugged what little liquid they had left, and Mary took the bottle from Remus, putting it in her bag.
All seven of them walked back up to school after notifying Professor McGonagall. It was almost dark, and the light was blue and fell through the trees softly.
Sirius tapped Remus on the shoulder and whispered in his ear. "You should tell them."
Remus didn't look at him, just hummed a neutral response.
"Seriously, Remus, you really should." Sirius wasn't going to stop until he had Remus's word.
"Fine. Tonight."
All seven of them sat cross legged on the Gryffindor boy's dorm, glass bottle spinning around and around.
"James, you spun it too hard." Mary stated.
"I did not! I used an appropriate amount of force!" James retaliated.
"I'm on Mary's side here, Jamie, it's been spinning for half a minute at least." Sirius said. He was lying on his stomach, head resting on his crossed arms. He looked bored.
James sat back grumbling.
It finally landed on Peter.
"Oooh, Peter, truth or dare?" James raised an eyebrow.
"Dare."
"I dare you... to stand on Sirius's bed, on one foot and sing the school song in falsetto."
Mary and Marlene snickered as he stood and went over to Sirius's unmade bed.
Peter was for some reason, very good at singing in falsetto, struggling only with balancing on the bed, but he managed to get through to the end without falling.
Everyone clapped when he jumped down, and Peter gave a small dramatic bow.
He sat back down and spun the bottle.
It went round and round and landed on Lily.
"Lily! Truth or dare?" Peter smiled almost evilly.
"Uhh." She thought for a moment. "Truth."
"Damn, I had a good dare too, uhmm, how many bottles of fire whiskey do you reckon you could drink in an hour?"
"What kind of question is that? Probably like 3? Not sure, never had it. If it's anything like Vodka, then maybe 2? If it's like Bailey's I could do 3, easily." The five full wizards looked at Lily with blank faces, as if she had stopped speaking English and had instead answered in fluent Spanish.
"It's a little stronger than Vodka, I think, but not as burny." Remus spoke up for the first time in a while. "Not creamy like Bailey's."
"Ahh, yeah I'll have 2 as my final answer."
Marlene just blinked; mouth open as if she was going to say something, but the words had been snatched away just as they touched her tongue.
"I think we broke them." Lily stated plainly.
"Do you guys only have three types of alcohol? Mead, wine and fire whiskey?" Remus turned to the rest of the company, slightly shocked.
"Yeah, I think so." James was the only one who managed to pick his jaw up off the floor and get his brain working again to answer.
"That somehow explains so much. Just spin the bottle, Lily."
So she did, it spin round and round and landed on Sirius. She was very quickly reminded that it was truth only, no dares allowed.
This rule had to be put in place after Sirius had hurt his ankle attempting to fly on a broomstick whilst doing a handstand. He was too reckless for his own good.
"How many people in this room would you feel comfortable giving an unprompted kiss on the lips?" Lily asked.
"Great question, Lils, how do you come up with these?" Mary reached over and softly petted the ends of Lily's amber hair.
"You might have the better dares, but muggle truths are the most brutal truths to ever truth. I forget none of you have been to a muggle sleepover." Lily smiled non-maleficently.
Sirius turned to his left. "You haven't been to a muggle sleepover, Remus?"
"Oh. Nah, live too far away from people for that." Remus shrugged.
Sirius paused and thought for a beat. "Don't you get lonely?"
"A little. But I have my radio and the milking cow, and that helps more than you'd think."
"Hm"
For just a couple seconds, it felt like it was just them, together, on the floor. No Peter playing absent-mindedly with an empty lighter, no James and Lily trying to outwit each other, no Marlene and Mary who looked like they were debating whether it was worth separating the two or not, just Sirius and Remus. Just two teenage boys, looking a bit too carefully into each other's eyes. 'I want to kiss him.' Sirius's mind blurted.
"Sirius?" Remus said quietly, as if he were going to share a deep dark secret.
"Yes?" Sirius responded, maybe a bit too eagerly.
"Stop dodging the truth question."
Ow. That hurt, Sirius thought.
"Just one." Sirius said. It wasn't completely true, he would probably be OK kissing Peter or James, but he only had one person on his mind right now.
"Only one!?" Peter shrieked. "Last time I counted, you had two best friends, Mr. Black!"
"Do you WANT me to kiss you, Pettigrew? 'Course you do," Sirius puckered his lips and opened his arms wide. "Come here and give me a big ol' kiss, Peter, make your dreams come true."
Peter squealed and shuffled back as Sirius advanced.
Mary kicked the bottle in Sirius's general direction, and he spun it, grinning. It landed on Remus.
Remus internally swore. May have also accidentally externally sworn too, but that's not important.
Sirius cracked his knuckles. "Remus, truth or dare?"
Remus knew what Sirius wanted. Truth and then he can say it, nice and easy, appearing to have been his choice and his alone to trust them all with the whole werewolf thing. But did he want them to know? Why risk messing everything up, when so far it had been so perfect? What was wrong with pretending that he was just a regular wizard boy?
"Truth"
As Remus said his response, the quiet sound of a violin quartet drifted into the room, signifying the start of the 15 timer that would lead to lights off.
"Shit, sorry boys, that our cue to leave." Marlene got up, offering hands to Mary and Lily.
Within a minute all three girls were out the door, saying brief goodnights and goodbyes.
James turned to Sirius. "What are you going to ask him?"
"Sorry what?" Sirius had zoned out a little.
"The truth, what are you going to ask?"
Sirius bluescreened. "Um, uh... hm... what is your deepest darkest secret."
Remus took a deep breath in. "Promise that you won't judge me for it?"
James and Peter quickly glanced at each other.
"Truth and dare rules state that no judging is allowed, and whatever is said never leaves the room it is uttered in." Peter spoke as if he had it memorized.
That put Remus at ease. Not complete ease, but something close enough. "I'm a werewolf. Have been since I was five. That's why I don't wear my prefect house, the headmaster decided silver was in style."
The three Gryffindors blinked, two in shock, the other in awe. Remus could hear the tap in the ensuite drip and feel his blood pulsing through his veins.