Chapter Text
It happened without me realizing it, since I met him I knew that his smile was going to be my downfall. My heart threatens to stop every time one of those bright smiles is directed towards me and as someone who could be said to have lived in solitude almost his entire life, for someone as sweet and loving as Izuku to come into your life without warning... It's As if a deity really took pity on me and at the same time was laughing in my face for the way I came to love this boy, every touch and every soft word he speaks to me is like a taunt, a small reminder that I will never be reciprocated by this beautiful boy.
For him I will always be his idol, his hero, his mentor, but I will never be more than that, he will never see me as the person he will want to have when he wakes up or the person who makes him feel loved.
I want to be the one who wraps him in his arms, who fills him with kisses and praise, to be the lucky one to be able to say that the charming and magnificent Izuku Midoriya is his.
Every hug he gives me feels like the best sensation and also the most agonizing, the touch is warm, but at the same time I feel like it's burning me and I want to push him away, at the same time bring him closer, it's a shame to be so close, but at the same time being so far away... My sweet pain, my beautiful boy.
I ask life and I ask the moon to never take me away from you.
I ask the universe that in some life you will be mine.
I thank dreams for giving me that false illusion that you are mine, for letting me hug you without feeling like I'm dying because that's where I want to belong, I can kiss you without the horrible sensation of feeling the fire of my misfortune and I can make mine in every way possible... I can hear how you pray for me, I can see you underneath me waiting for me to claim you and begging for me to mark you from the depths of you, see you crying desperately because you want me to be yours like me I so want you to be mine.
And every time I wake up alone in a bed, without your warmth, without your smile... My little daily warning that I am falling more and more in love with you every day.
Oh my life! Don't be cruel and do me the favor of having my beloved Izuku by my side.
I die of jealousy every time I see how you chase young Bakugou, going after him as if he were someone worthy of your attention and affection, I die because within my darkest thoughts the one who says that I am more deserving of that affection that the young man who at some point in your life made you feel terribly bad... I was the one who consoled you when you told me how bad it had been for you because of your lack of Quirk, I was the one to whom you clung when you cried because you You felt wanted and loved by me, my beloved, I love you more than I let on.
I'm afraid that, if at some point you discover those feelings kept by you, you'll decide to walk away from me, I'm so afraid that you'll leave my side... Having you in my life as my successor is not enough, but it's better than not having you. , I can't go back to that loneliness from which you saved me.
I'm jealous every time I see you with young Todoroki, every time I see you very close to him, I want to go demand that you turn in my direction and see only me for the rest of your life. Those longing looks that young Todoroki and young Bakugo give you make me sick because I know that, having two great ones, capable of keeping up with you, full of life and handsome boys your age, not even in a thousand years will I have a chance with you.
Someone as old, worn out and dying as me... What could I offer you?
I would shower you with love in more ways than one, however, I couldn't follow in your footsteps like someone your age would... I curse my age.
Please give me a chance and I will show you that you don't need anyone else, you only need me and only me... I curse life for creating an abysmal difference in the form of years between us.
I lived so focused on you and on the jealousy that invades me every time you are close to a boy, especially the young Bakugou and Todorki that I almost overlooked that there was another person pining for you... You have made someone else fall for you. your charms, once again I confirm that you are a precious jewel which everyone can admire and keep for themselves, including me.
It is a surprise to me to discover that, Aizawa, also seems to be pining for you and I became more attentive to your interactions together to finish confirming the way his hand stays much longer than necessary in your beautiful hair, I was aware of The furtive glances he gives you when he thinks no one is watching and I swear I can see heart shapes in his eyes every time he appreciates you as something wonderful, then I can agree with him... Because, my boy, you are the most precious thing that life has given us.
I'm not the only one who has fallen into the deepest depths for your love, I feel relieved to know this new information and I feel more tension in my chest... Even Aizawa is still younger than me, 16 years makes a big difference between Aizawa and me, it makes your teacher have an advantage over me
Will I ever be an option for you?
Did you ever think of me as more than your hero or mentor?
Have you imagined what it would be like to kiss me?
Are you aware of the extent of my love for you?
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And it really didn't surprise me that one day young Bakugo decided to accompany you in one of our private training sessions, interrupting the little time where I can have you to myself... A few weeks ago I began to realize how attached I was to you. The young man turned towards you, not wanting to leave you alone at any time if possible, I wish I could do the same.
- All Might, are you okay?
You asked me, taking me out of my regret... My mistake was turning to look at you because the sight greeted me with your beautiful green eyes, I can almost see myself reflected in your beautiful gems.
- Old man, are you becoming senile or what? Deku is talking to you!
I was brought out of my reverie again by young Bakugo, with his representative anger.
-Sorry guys, I'm a little distracted today.
- Is everything okay, All Might? Is there something serious? Can I help with something?
There's my sweet boy, always willing to help others and if you only knew that what keeps me distracted is you.
-No boy, everything is fine, don't worry.
I calmed down my Izuku with a soft voice, almost forgetting that we were accompanied.
- You heard it Deku, stop worrying and start training with me!
Yes, that scream was responsible for reminding me that I didn't have you for me today.
After half an hour training I told them to rest, I was going to go get your water bottle, to give it to you while you wipe off the sweat...
-Here Deku, here.
Bakugo beat me to it, of course... Youthful speed, something I no longer counted on and that made me feel irritated. Hopefully tomorrow we will not have the presence of the young man, something I really doubt, but I hope I am wrong.
-Thank you Kacchan!- That nickname is now starting to seem irritating to me and I just stand on one side watching you smile and give attention to someone else who I'm not.
-So you invited young Bakugo to training today.
I commented as casually as possible, I wanted to know if my Izuku was the one who invited him or if, knowing young Bakugo, he invited himself to training.
-Really...
-I came on my own, is there a problem with that or what?
He interrupted my boy and with the answer given I let out the sigh that I didn't know I was saving because of course young Bakugo invited himself.
-I'm sorry for not telling you before, All Might.
I look at myself with those guilt-ridden ones, if only I knew I would never get mad at him because he has me wrapped around his finger. My child, you can do whatever you want and he would never be able to hate you, I was born to love you no matter what.
-Don't worry boy, I'm just taken by surprise, young Bakugo will always be welcome.
Honestly, it was very difficult for me to say the last thing and I made a huge effort not to make any grimace, so my displeasure would not become noticeable.
- Let's continue training Deku, not even if this was a confidential training!
It will not be confidential because apparently young Midoriya cannot hide anything from young Bakugo, being a great connoisseur of their past together, it seems wonderful to me that he still has that trust in his life and I wish it weren't like that... Maybe now he had Izuku alone for me.
They continued training for a considerable time while I watched how they seemed to dance around each other, I want to go and end today's session and demand that Izuku never let anyone else interrupt our time alone.
It kills me to see that there is someone much more compatible with my loved one than me, even with the past they carry it seems that they are destined to be together in all aspects of their lives and I can only see, I can only regret the punishment he gives me life... My punishment for being the symbol of peace.
Life gave me and it also took away, everything has a price.
- Shit!
I exclaimed when I felt a hand on my back, I don't know when I walked to an isolated place... Apparently I felt too overwhelmed by my thoughts and my body decided to move away, I turned slowly to see my Izuku with concern painting her pretty face, especially her eyes.
- All Might, are you sure everything is okay? I have noticed you tense and distracted.
I sighed.
-Yes Izuku, everything is fine... I just feel overwhelmed by some things.
Speak with some sincerity.
-Oh... You know what, if you need me I will be here for you, remember that you are not alone All Might.
He answers me with the kind of smiles that only he can give you, those that blind you because of how brilliant he is and that make you want nothing more than to just be able to see him for the rest of your life.
-I know, it's only a matter of time before I put everything in order and thank you young Midoriya for worrying.
I gave him one of my most sincere smiles to try to give that calming effect. What I didn't expect were arms surrounding my waist and a warm body half curled up on my chest.
-I will always worry about you All Might, you are very important to me and I love you too much not to.
If you would just call me by my name, how beautiful it would sound: "I love you so much Yagi" come out of your pretty mouth, with that melodious voice you have... If you loved me as Yagi Toshinori and not as All Might.
Even so, I took the liberty of hugging you back, enjoying the warmth of your body and pretending that we were just any couple showing how much they love and long for each other in a hug.
-Maybe we should go back so as not to leave young Bakugo alone any longer.
Reluctantly I broke away from the beautiful hug we were giving each other.
-Yes... Kacchan doesn't like me leaving him alone.
-Young Bakugo has become very attached to you in these weeks, hasn't he?
I inquired in the least obvious way possible and upon noticing that Izuku's majestic cheeks turn red, I knew that something happened or is happening between my beloved and Bakugo... I wanted to go and yell at Bakugo to stay away from my boy, to leave him. at peace because he didn't need anyone but me, that I could meet all his needs.
-Did something happen between you young Midoriya?
I insisted, I want to know exactly what is happening between the two of them and it will sound masochistic on my part, but I don't want to discover that the love of my life was taken away from me by catching my protégé exchanging drool with his... Whatever that are.
The single image that my imagination created was enough to make me want to go and take Izuku away, take him to a place where it's just me and him... Almost like kidnapping and that thought scares me because I'm aware of how far I would go for my boy.
-...No, really, he just became more affectionate? With me, of course in his way... But that's all.
Izuku explained as he sighed and scratched the back of his neck, a gesture he only does when he gets nervous and/or shy.
-Does that bother you?
I asked with genuine concern.
-No no no... It just seems strange to me, since given our history I am not used to receiving this new treatment from him.
Something I noticed about my boy is that he feels like he doesn't deserve the love that the rest of us give him. It seems hard to believe, but with everything he had to go through, it's understandable... They made him believe that he needs to work hard, shedding his blood. and yet never being able to deserve that affection.
-I think that...
- Fuck! How much do you two talk? It's taking them so long to get back!
He cut the blonde again, the small warning that we are not alone and that the pleasure of having you to myself was only short-lived.
-Nothing Kacchan, sorry for the delay.
-Anyway, let's go, we have to take a shower.
He commented as he gave me a nod of his head in farewell, which I reciprocated with the same and he turned around to walk towards the building where the dormitories are located.
-Right, see you tomorrow All Might.
-See you tomorrow guys.
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Today I was with Izuku's class, during heroism training time, seeing the class improve day after day is a satisfying feeling, but seeing my boy become stronger as time goes by fills me with pride. My eyes do not take off from the blur of green rays that moves nimbly through the training field, the ease with which it delivers firm blows, like just a kick or a punch seems to take years off your life... Its. beautiful face with calculating eyes, with determined features and the confidence that radiates from him, the one that tells you that there is nothing to fear because he is there and he is not going to let you fall so easily is so comforting, worthy of a hero.
I managed to catch a head of black hair moving as I turned my head from the corner of my eye and I remembered... I'm not the only one captivated by Izuku, I'm not the only one yearning and I saw Aizawa's look... If I didn't spend so much time with him You might think he has the same boring look as always, however, I have been watching him closely for a while now and I can affirm with my life that the look he has now means more, it has a lot of love and adoration behind it.
Just like the one I suspect I also have when I see young Midoriya.
Just like the one that young Bakugo and Todoroki send to the same person.
Of all the options my boy has to choose from, I am the worst... I wish I could offer more but I already offered my everything keeping the world safe, now I can't do anything to take care of my world.
-Young Midoriya has visibly improved, hasn't he Aizawa?
I couldn't avoid said comment, not knowing why exactly I said it and I couldn't contain the venom behind the other teacher's name.
-Yes, Midoriya has magnificent potential.... he is so brilliant
I almost missed the last part because he said it with almost no voice, but he sounded with so much admiration, which goes beyond that of a teacher to a student.
I didn't answer anything after the last statement and returned my gaze to the class, only to notice how Todoroki was being hugged by Izuku... What did I miss?
-Brats, what happened?
Nol I was the only one who was distracted by Izuku, thanks Aizawa for asking, I want to know too.
-I'm sorry sensei, what happened was...
- Was the hug so necessary? Are you going to go around hugging villains just like that for no reason? Are you something more than friends...
-Enough Young Aizawa, let them explain... Go ahead guys.
Cut Aizawa's frantic questions, apparently I'm not the only one who desperately needs to know the answers to why such an interaction.
It's probably very possessive of us to not want anyone else to get close to Izuku, I can totally understand Aizawa but we can't make it too obvious for even more obvious reasons.
-Yes, well... First of all, I'm sorry again sensei and what I was trying to explain is that Todoroki's nose started to bleed from the blow I gave him and then I came running to see if he was okay, I was worried that It was too serious, but apparently it was not that serious, I was already going to run and tell Sensei to take him to Recovery Girl to verify that everything was okay and thus cure him as quickly as possible...
- Calm down boy, breathe.
-That still doesn't answer the hug.
-I asked him to hug me, it's something my mom used to tell me: "A hug from a person you love helps reduce your pain" and it worked.
Todoroki expressed as he looked at Izukui with an expression of calm, love and longing, who blushed noticeably at said statement and of course, he is not the only one with a red face, but they are for different reasons, anger/jealousy.
- PFF, YOU ARE TRAINING TO BE AN ICYHOT HERO, NOT A SWAT!
He approaches young Bakugo shouting and lands next to Izuku.
I just limit myself to observing because I don't trust my control after Todorki's "innocent" statement.
-Kacchan, please calm down.
-You don't hug me when I feel pain, Deku and him, yes... Do you prefer him more?
-Kacchan no, it's not that... You never ask me for hugs, I didn't think that you want any physical interaction with me.
My brain decided to disconnect, there were too many feelings of anger and jealousy to handle... Thanks to old age, thanks to my old brain for giving me the great gift of dissociating...
I don't want to see my loved one taken away from me.