Chapter Text
“...My love…”
Ray Mond keeps her eyes closed until the feeling of his hand pressed in hers fades away, replaced by the sheets being strangled in her fist. She slowly opens her eyes, the warmth from her dream fading as the fleeting feeling of Chatterbox’s embrace disappears from her body’s memory. She shivers and hugs her blankets closer to her body. The cold air from the passing snowstorm creeps through the prison's stone walls and her cell's singular window.
“I miss you, Chatty…”
She whispers to the wall, her knees curling into her chest as she lies there. She tries to chase sleep for a little while longer, hoping to find him again, hug him, and talk to him again. But sleep evades her as the storm picks up outside. Cursing silently, Ray sits up in her bed slowly so she won’t trigger the creaking frame. She reaches down to pick up a small flashlight from underneath the bed, something she stole from the prison guards to read on sleepless nights. She turns it on to shine around her cell, the tiny space wide enough to lay on the floor, and her feet barely touch the opposite wall. But good behavior and a lot of persuasion gave her this cell. She got a window, after all, and the cell to herself.
The window was her only peek into the outside world, granted, it was only the view of the prison yard. Ray spent hours looking out this window, daydreaming, thinking about her life back home, her home, her heart, and what she would return to. She had gotten used to the prison routine, though it was tough at first, lots of solitary confinement and fights to establish herself, lots of denial leading to broken bones and more time gained onto her sentence. Eventually, she gave up trying to fight it and stayed to herself, other than the occasional fight….or two.
During the day, Ray would roam around the yard when the guards permitted. Talking and joking with other prisoners was a good distraction from her overbearing thoughts about the life she left behind. She made some friends but didn’t let them get close, knowing that she wasn’t going to stay forever. Leaving them behind would have been easier if she hadn’t gotten close. Nevertheless, they definitely made things interesting. Exchanging stories, messing with the guards, and eating together, she wasn’t entirely alone.
Ray found it more difficult to keep the thoughts away when night fell. The darkness kept her awake, and she saw shadows spin tales along the walls as clouds passed over her window. A dragon and a cursed cat dance along the walls, telling stories of family lost and found, of love found and then lost. She found it difficult to look away from their tale, absorbed into the stories until sleep claimed her, filling her dreams with the longing and heartache of a home so far out of reach. At times, prison reminds her of the life she lived. The noises of her neighbors at night reminded her of the times she slept in the same bed with five other people. Gigi’s snores, Timothy’s sleepy cuddling, and April waking up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom. The memories make her smile and remind her of the friends she has back home. Her adventure to find herself had been treacherous and painful at times, but nothing compared to this, remembering everything but having it kept away from her.
Now, she stares at the dancing shadows, weaving their shapes across the wall in green and blue hues.
With a small gasp, Ray turns off the flashlight and looks out the window, immediately squinting her eyes at the vibrant sky. The clouds had cleared, and the earth was now powdered in thick snow. Ray could only stare in awe, unaware that she could see the northern lights from the prison's location. After all of the sleepless nights, the sky chose today of all days to show her a vision of a love lost and found. Ray laughs to herself as she looks at the calendar on the wall, which she also persuaded the guards to give her.
“Happy anniversary, Chatty.”
Turning back to the sky, the dragon made of blue and green and the cursed cat of purple and pink clash in a mesmerizing dance, this time spinning a tale of love and adventure. Hearts thawing, walls dropped, silence filled with the most comforting melody as a chance encounter with a mischievous clown turned a lost woman’s life around.
Ray loses herself in the story, shadows morphing into vibrant pictures as she settles back onto her bed. Echoes of his laugh swirl in her mind. The laugh that once scared her now felt like home. Chatty’s infectious personality and natural ability to lead others filled her heart. He was always so funny.
Most of all, Ray’s soul will never forget the love he had for her. Chatterbox would stop the world from spinning if Ray was around. He could have spent every moment with her if he could.
Though she never admitted it to him, Ray loved being around him. His affections were entrancing but also overwhelming. If it meant spending more time with her, Chatterbox would have stopped the world from turning. He would have gladly given every moment to her if he could. Ray held his attention, and that was enough for him. It made him happy. Chatterbox was the first person who truly made her feel loved, who made her feel wanted.
Tears blur the vision, and Ray angrily blinks them away, cursing them for obstructing the memories. She tries to find the shapes in the shadows again, but the moon starts falling, replaced by the blinding sun as the new day starts. Her moon is gone, and so are the shadows that help keep his memory alive. With a shaky breath, Ray pushes down the rising anger towards the sun. After all, the Sun signified a new day starting, and that was one day closer to the end of her sentence.
Ray curls up under the sheets once more and tries to find sleep. “I miss you,” she whispers softly to the wall before sleep claims her.
The void swallows her dreams for the next few hours before the usual call of her name wakes her.
“Mond, are you awake?”
Ray lifts her head to glare at the prison guard. Unphased, the woman opens Ray’s cell and walks right in. Ray sits up to greet the familiar face, a companion she has made in this unfamiliar place.
“What time is it?” Ray asks groggily, stretching her arms up over her head.
“It’s past noon. You couldn’t sleep?” the woman gives Ray a sympathetic smile as she stands against the opposite wall. Ray only shrugs and stares at the wall behind the guard. The old brick walls are now bathed in light as the sun casts its glow from its peak.
“I was watching the sky,” Ray responds.
The guard nods, allowing a brief moment of silence before reaching out a hand holding a piece of paper. Ray looks closely, her brain blanking for a few seconds before she realizes it’s an envelope.
“You got some mail today.”
What? But nobody knows where I am.
Time seems to blur together as Ray reaches out to grab the envelope. Her hands are shaking as she reads the sender’s name and address.
From: Chatterbox
In the most horrendous handwriting Ray has seen. It almost makes her laugh, but she is too busy asking herself whether this is a dream. She looks up at the guard, but she has silently left the cell and stands outside the door. Ray stares at the envelope some more, too afraid to open it, too afraid of a sick prank pulled by people who hate her. Then she realizes that she rarely says his name at all.
With a deep inhale, she opens the envelope and takes out several pages of letters. The first one is addressed to ‘My Ray’ in better handwriting than the front of the envelope. Ray reads the letter three times before the words sink in.
My Ray,
So you finally went to prison!
I don’t even know where to start, and I don’t know if you’ll receive this letter.
Offiper Bell told me the news. They said your prison gave them an update on you when they reached out for a background check.
Your clean record is finally gone! I’m so yuckin proud of you, and I hope you’re okay.
I miss you so much, and there is so much more I want to say, but Tessa is writing this, and I don’t want to take up all of her time. (Hello.)
This paper isn’t yuckin long enough for all of the words I want to say, so I’m coming to visit you. I want need to see you,
I love you,
Chatterbox.
Ps.
Hi, this is Tessa. Chatterbox got so excited that he practically told the entire city. Your friends want to go with him to see you, but I suggested they write a letter instead so you won’t be overwhelmed. Their letters are behind this one.
The letters in question are filled with heartfelt words from her friends and those she considers family. By the time she finished reading them, the pages were stained with tears. Her sobs echo in her cell, the release of emotions crashing over her like the release of a dam. The other letters slip from her hands as she clutches Chatty’s letter to her chest, holding it as if it might hold her together.
“He’s coming to see me…” she gasps out between sniffs. “He knows where I am. He knows I’m alive!”
Ray doesn’t know how to feel, her relief is being outweighed by her fear as the realization of Chatty’s arrival settles in. Was she really ready to see him? So much time has passed. So much has changed since she walked away from him at the airport. Did he hate her?
Thoughts such as this plague Ray endlessly as the days and nights pass. The shadows no longer dance. Instead, blotches of shapes morph from one anxiety to another as Ray’s mind fights sleep. Ray frantically paces her cell, day and night, asking the same questions repeatedly until she starts to question if Chatty is actually coming to see her. He could have changed his mind or gotten hurt during the trip. What if he had changed his mind? What if he wasn’t the one who wrote that letter? What if it was all a lie?
“Mond!” Ray’s head snaps up from picking at the grass as her name is called from across the yard. The friendly prison guard is waiting by the door, signaling for Ray to come over. When Ray approaches, the guard speaks gently. “You have a visitor.”
Ray is lost for words, staring at the prison guard as if she had grown a second head.
“Just in time for Christmas. he has good timing.” the guard chuckles and motions for Ray to follow/
The walk to visitation is long, and Ray comes up with ten different excuses for returning to her cell before they reach their destination. Her heart is pounding in her ears, her hands shoved in her pockets as they approach the doors. Inside, the guard leads Ray to a private room, past the larger visitation rooms, where large families meet in a cafeteria-like setting.
They approach a door, and Ray stills as she sees a man standing inside from the window on the door. Chatterbox sits with his back to them, gazing outside the window, his foot tapping restlessly. As the guard opens the door, he turns to face them immediately. Ray's mind blanks the moment their eyes meet, her body locking in place. Every instinct urges her to run to him embrace him, and tell him she loves him. But she can’t move. Chatty’s eyes mirror her hesitation, anchoring her where she stands as the weight of unspoken emotions binds them both to their spots.
Chatterbox is wearing a familiar mask—obviously, not the one he gave her, but very similar. The damaged mask is torn in half and held together by leather and glue. The material looks old, discolored, and dull. The half of his face that isn’t covered by the mask is a face she didn't think she would ever forget until she saw it. The handsome face she tried so hard to visualize in shapes of shadows was now right in front of her. Ray takes in every inch of it, burning it into her memory.
Then he steps forward, and a single word falls from his mouth.
“Hi.”
“..Hi Chatty.”