Chapter Text
For a moment after she finished speaking, he couldn’t talk or move. She’d actually said she loved him, had loved him, for years.
He moved around the table until he was kneeling beside her chair. One of his hands threaded into her hair. “That was a good story, my love.”
Then his mouth met hers.
This was no quick kiss this time. This was fourteen years of dancing around each other finally paying off - equal parts sweetness and desperation. She shifted toward him on the chair and he clamped an arm around her waist, gathering her to him. As their mouths tasted and nipped again and again, she wrapped her arms around his neck and they were even closer. He was trailing kisses along her jaw, reveling in the tightening grip of her hand into the fabric of his uniform when her communicator chirped.
“Tysess to Admiral Janeway.”
Chakotay pulled back just enough to let his head fall to her shoulder. Clearing her throat, she rested her hand on the back of his head, and used her other hand to tap the badge. “Janeway here.”
“Sorry to disturb you, Admiral, but I wanted to let you know that Admiral Jellico has contacted us for an update on our situation,” Tysess said.
She sighed and made a noise of frustration. Chakotay couldn’t help but let out a silent chuckle and was rewarded when her hand skimmed through his hair. “Give him the basics Tysess, and tell him I’ll get back with a full report within the hour,” she said.
“Admiral...” Tysess sounded hesitant. “I don’t mean to overstep, but I’m sure I could give him sufficient information to put your report off until tomorrow. You haven’t been properly off duty in weeks, ma’am.”
Well, Chakotay thought, that was the Kathryn Janeway he knew. And suddenly the intrusion of Starfleet protocol into what had been their moment felt perilous. However, she’d made absolutely no effort to adjust their embrace beyond what was necessary to deal with the call.
“An excellent idea, commander,” she said. “Thank you.”
“Also, I wanted to let you know that I took the liberty of assigning Captain Chakotay quarters in 1105,” Commander Tysess said, and there was an edge in his voice. Worry? Teasing? Some combination thereof? “I tried contacting him but...well, there must have been a problem.”
Chakotay looked down. He had forgotten to put his badge back on – it was sitting in her bathroom. He shook his head and met her eyes. There was no doubt that Tysess knew where he was right now. Would that bother her?
His answer was clear in her amused expression, and he couldn’t resist another quick, silent kiss.
“I’m with the captain,” Kathryn said, with a surprisingly normal tone in her voice. “I’ll be happy to pass along your message.”
“Of course, Admiral,” Tysess said. And this time the teasing was clear. “I’m assuming you can help him find his way there.”
“Yes. Thank you, commander,” she said crisply. “Janeway out.”
Chakotay leaned his forehead against hers. “I don’t know. He sounds pretty loyal.”
She laughed, and their bodies were close enough that he could feel it. That was a particularly rewarding sensation. “He is, but you definitely have the edge on handsome and dashing,” she said.
One of his knees picked that moment to remind him that he was 60 plus years old, and he reluctantly climbed to his feet. “And old and tired.”
She looked worried and touched his arm, starting to rise from her chair. He put his hand on her shoulder to stop her. “We’re finishing dinner,” he said, before she could suggest he go off to sleep. “It sounds like you might need it as much as I do.”
When he’d think back on that evening later in life, it was always a bit of a revelation to realize that just sitting there eating a meal with her had been as healing to him as the beginnings of their physical relationship. Hearing her laugh, listening to her voice, having her gently shove him on the shoulder when she teased him. Yes, he wanted her and was in love, but he’d also desperately missed the woman who was simply the best friend he’d ever had. This was what had sustained them so much during those seven brutal years on their Voyager, and even in those rocky, awkward days when they’d first returned to Earth.
Finding out that his ten years of isolation had not robbed him of that friendship gave him as much hope as anything ever had.
As they took their last bites of the pasta, she sighed. “I suppose I should walk you to your quarters,” she said. He could see the fatigue on her face, and as much as he wanted to argue, felt the heavy weight of it in his own body. An echo of sorrow flashed across her face. “Though I don’t really want to let you out of my sight.”
“Who says you have to?” he said, unable to resist flirting with her.
Their eyes locked. She looked a little flushed and he felt that sparking energy start...then his traitorous body yawned.
She reached for his hand again. “Promise I can see you tomorrow?”
They were both still in Starfleet and they both knew they were a long way from anything even resembling peace and quiet. But this he could promise her. “Absolutely.”
Both standing, he pulled her against him again. “We’d better say our real goodnight right here then,” he said. “Otherwise, I’m afraid we’re going to scandalize some crewmen.”
“Not sure I care,” she murmured into his chest.
Yeah, this was definitely new. They shared another kiss, it wasn’t quite as heated as the one Tysess had interrupted, but it left plenty of room for hope. It broke off when he yawned again. “I’m so sorry. This isn’t how I wanted...”
She put a hand to his face. “We’ve already dealt with a couple of regrets tonight, commander,” she caught herself and gave a shake of her head. “Captain – I’ve no doubt the rest of it can wait until you’re not about to fall off your feet.”
He grabbed her hand, kissed her palm, and felt the shiver that ran through her. Yeah, this was going to be fun. “But just until then,” he said. Then he locked eyes with her. “Though there’s no need to rush through the good parts.”
Her answering smile filled up a large percentage of the emptiness that had chased him this last decade. “Good might be an understatement,” she said. She rubbed a thumb over his cheek. “Breakfast at 0700?”
“Please,” he said.
“And I want to go with you to sickbay,” she said.
He smoothed a piece of her hair back. “I’m sure there are a thousand more important things a Vice Admiral needs to be doing.”
She pushed up on her toes and kissed him again. “Not this Vice Admiral.” She gave him a mischievous grin, and slid her hands up his back. “Besides I need to be able to compose a detailed and factual report of your condition.”
This time it was his turn to feel a little flushed. “Fine then, sickbay it is. Not the most romantic date, but I’ll take it.”
With a heavy sigh she stepped back from him. “I’ll grab your commbadge,” she said. “Though we need to get you a new one.”
“Another task for tomorrow,” he said, with his own sigh. Just talking about what was left to be done made him suddenly feel his age and exhaustion again. “Along with saving the entire fabric of reality...”
His comment seemed to splash cold water over them both. But they were hand in hand as they walked out the door of her quarters. He was happy to find that his new quarters were only a five-minute walk from hers. They stopped in front of the doors, both of them obviously reluctant to part company.
“Chakotay,” she said, and there was something more than a little sad in her voice. “We both have so much behind us...and so much to do...is there even time...” She shook her head, and looked at the floor. “I really am bad at this.” She fidgeted with her hands again, “Are you sure you want to put up with me?” There were years of regret in those words – he could feel it.
“Kathryn,” he said, putting his hands on both sides of her face. There was more than a little frustration when he said, “I love you, and you told me you love me. Did you mean that?” He wasn’t just trying to reassure her, he also needed to hear her answer.
“Yes,” she said with full confidence.
“And do you want to be with me?” he asked, more gently.
He saw determination blaze in her eyes. “Yes, of course.”
He kissed her again, scandalized crewmen be damned. “Then we’ll figure the rest out.”