Chapter Text
Hogwarts Express, the last train car, just behind the closed door, on the steps
1, September 1971
Sirius was frozen. Horror freezing his bones as the train carried him away. Waves of lethal fury crashing into him, he was drowning against it all. His breath was cruelly taken from him yanking him away from any ties he had with reality. He was drowning.
He had known what those spoken words meant, realised it the second his brother spoke them. He also knew the torture awaiting his brother at home.
Their mother would use the curse on his brother with such precise and constant use as she took all her anger out on him, he imagined his brother broken on the floor, held together by fraying fragments as long as he could until Sirius returned home.
He would kill her for this. Once he found a way to take Regulus and run he would kill her. No matter the cost.
He would give her the son she would finally be proud of.
He said his vow, firm and unbreakable.
Je le jure Regulus je la tuerai pour ça.
Hogwarts express, the last train car, 5 feet away from Sirius Black.
1st ,September 1971
Peter watched as the raven haired boy went through a thousand emotions in about 2 minutes, an impressive feat if it wasn't such terrifying expressions the first year was having.
He watched as this stranger fell backwards in shock, gripping the rail so tightly as his body moved towards the open door, he had to force himself not to jump off, which Peter thought was odd considering this stranger was an 11 year old wizard but who was he to judge.
When the door closed he fell to the ground and cried, he was breaking apart and Peter heard a single word he kept repeating.
Fishy.
Why this kid was whispering fishy Peter had no idea, soon the devastated whisper almost like it was a prayer slithered into a promise of vengeance.
This kid went from crying on the train railing to looking like he was gonna murder someone and not regret it one bit.
Was Peter sure this was a first year? What 11 year old could look so terrifying? Or switch from one emotion to the other that quick?
Peter decided the only way to fix this would be cookies.
Not just any cookies though, no no no. They were NOT good enough for this type of situation.
Though Peter had never encountered a situation like this before, but that was irrelevant.
He turned towards James who at this moment had no idea what Peter was dealing with, too engrossed in the healing goodness he was holding in his hands.
A heavenly treat that they had an entire suitcase filled entirely of the most amazing thing you will ever taste.
Though Peter would say he was biassed, but Merlin the deliciousness he also held in his hands was going to forever be the best thing he ever tasted in his life.
So obviously the best course of action Peter could think up to help this stranger was the cookies he held in his possession, a stranger who he was slightly terrified of but also very protective over for reasons unknown but regardless they existed. He's learnt not to question things like this and ask himself WWJPD. What Would James Potter Do? It has never steered him astray. Yet….. Peter sends a silent wish to anyone out there to not make this his first encounter where it all goes wrong.
He looked back at James to see him looking in wonder and awe at his cookies. Which he totally understood. He could do this on his own. Probably, maybe, somewhat. No.
Peter's internal monologue needed to shut up for just five minutes. That should be long enough for him to talk himself into his plan and also do the plan. Did he even have a plan? Not important Peter, he needed to focus. And quickly.
The stranger had yet to move from his spot on the floor, however there was something to say about how quickly his body language switched. This boy looked surprisingly lethal for someone so short.
Okay Peter, he chided himself in his mind. That was mean. True. but mean nonetheless.
He looked at the basket of cookies in his hand and quickly snatched one up and put it in a napkin for him. This situation was probably time sensitive so Peter had to try his best to help quickly.
Soon Peter stood next to the boy, who didn't seem to register his presence at all. His eyes were scary but empty at the same time.
So Peter employed a more hands on approach.
Peter sat down next to the stranger and stuck his hands out and with a huge smile on his face put the cookie in his hands directly in front of the boy's face.
What happened next was the most alien conversation Peter had ever had.
Here's how it went
The stranger turning his death glare to Peter : “What in merlin's hell are you doing”
Peter starting to cry : A cookie I think?
The stranger : “Why on this green fucking earth would you ever want to give me a cookie?”
Peter was confused as to why he was asking why : “Because you looked sad before you turned into a death machine so I thought a cookie might help you feel better.”
The stranger's eyes changed into the most confused but awestruck facial expression Peter had ever seen : “So let me get this correct, you, a complete stranger, wanted to help me feel better with a cookie?”
Peter is extremely worried about this kid now because why was the action of a cookie offering so profound to him, like he had never seen an ounce of kindness before in his life : “Well do you not want the cookie? If you dont I am really going to need it back as it is a very precious cookie.”
AT THIS the stranger quickly grabbed his cookie from Peter’s still outstretched hands shrinking into himself : “No.. pause for dramatic effect - No please let me have the cookie I’m sorry.”
Peter is now extra extremely worried because why would he react that way to a cookie. Peter smiled his biggest smile and proceeded to give the stranger the whole plate of cookies in his hands : “ Take it please you can't just have one of the world famous chocolate chunk crunch cookies made at the hands of the best and brightest Euphemia Potter, also your coming with me and James to find a train car for the train ride. You can't sit here the entire time looking like you want to murder someone. On that note just to clarify you do not in fact want to murder me correct?”
The stranger : “No I don’t….. Obviously I’m going to murder my mother.”
Peter thinks well there's probably a justifiable reason for this 11 year old to be so vengeful vowing to murder his mother : “Okay sounds great!” “Now hurry on up James already started down the hallway. By the way, before I forget. What’s your name?”
The stranger who in that instant became a not stranger said proudly but also sadly if that was even possible : “”Sirius, Sirius Black. That's not a problem is it?”
Peter is worried but also gobsmacked that he would even think he would be a problem : “ No of course not! I’m Peter by the way Peter Pettigrew. Now hurry up James keeps on moving.
“How can you know where he's going?” Sirius asked cautiously yet with awe that this stranger was being so nice? It was foreign to him and shocked him enough he came out of his rage.
“Just follow the cookie crumbs and it will lead us right to him.” Peter smiled. He had made his first new friend.
Hogwarts Express, following two very odd wizards to an unknown destination
1st September, 1971
Sirius could not for the life of him comprehend what he just experienced. Never in his entire life has someone treated him that foreign. He could not figure out what the fuck just happened, or why he was just blindly following strangers on a train.
He made a list in his head to learn about people so this would make sense to him and he could do it back. He didn't like not knowing.
He had never met anyone outside of his family in his entire life. He needed to get ahead of this if he could survive here. He also was angry so he made his list in french. He needed some grip on what he knew.
Qu’est-ce qui vient de se passer? Très important!
Pourquoi les cookies vous rendent-ils moins tristes?
Pourquoi les gens sont-ils gentils?
Qu’est-ce que cela signifie d' être gentil?
Comment être gentil?
Pourquoi Peter ne m’a-t-il pas maudit?
Est-il normal de répondre aux gens par des jurons ou des insultes?
Pourquoi est-il normal que je m’attende à ce que les gens soient cruels avec moi? C’est vital je pense.
Ces questions sont-elles bonnes à se poser?
This was too confusing for his brain to understand so he opted to just blindly follow Peter and a wildly wonderfully weird dancing person Peter was following leading him to assume that was James.
Merlin, cette gentille chose est plus terrifiante que ma mère. Pourquoi est-ce plus terrifiant que ma mère?
Sirius froze when he realised he switched to French. Merde. This was bad bad.
He looked back up towards the boys realising he stopped walking as he made his list. Peter was waiting, as well as who he assumed to be James for him to catch up he supposed. Though he wasn’t worth waiting for, but that was besides the point.
Merde. Merde. MERDE.
He watched puzzled as they waited for him. He didn’t know people could do that. Was he sure they were even people?
At the very least the immense crisis flooding him at their behaviour he wasn't thinking of all the ways he could murder his mother. Even if it wouldn’t last that long. Sirius gave this new experience about five more minutes until he was back to a death machine as Peter had so aptly put it.
There was a war brewing between him and Walburga, one that had been waiting for a catalyst since the moment Sirius had someone worth protecting.
This was his catalyst. And no matter what happened to him, Sirius would make sure he won this in the end. This world has had enough of Walburga Black’s antics and it was well past due he ended this.
Back to a death machine, save for a newfound friend
Une machine de mort avec des amis, this was definitely a new one for even him.
Sirius could feel this was only the beginning, felt despite all his fury and pain a new hope awaiting him with those boys a future for himself that he might fight for, so long as he never shared what he was this would be perfect.
He only hoped this might last if it was at all possible, he selfishly wanted something to belong to besides his family, a rope to tie him to the ground, a weight to keep him from drowning.
He hoped the two boys ahead of him and whatever strangers awaited him in the last train car would be that for him. Save him in every way he could be, even in ways he had not yet imagined yet.
So he prayed to Merlin and whatever gods existed to save him because he was selfish afterall, he always had been and always would be. He was Sirius Black. Afterall.
He hesitated, the two boys had waited until they knew he had seen them go into the car they had chosen, the very last one on the train far from the train car he promised his family he would remain, sitting with the haughty pureblood elitists he had grown up surrounded by.
He thrived in rebellion. What could he say? That he wasn't, no that would be untrue and if Sirius knew himself to be one thing he was honest to any extent he deemed necessary. You were cruellest when you used your honesty to be brutal.
He froze again as he realised the door stood ahead of him, he still needed time to process the past five minutes so he stood and watched the scene unfold in front of him like a picture film.
There were two benches facing each other, one held Peter and assumed James, and opposite sat a boy who shined to him, like the light of a full moon. He was curled up upon himself. Sirius swore to them if ever there was a wizard or witch that wanted to become a part of the furniture they would be this boy. There was a beauty in it he promised then, this boy sat in a ray of moonshine to Sirius Black.
He knew what this meant, knew the signs. He however did not even know his name so it was not like Sirius was going to say anything ever at all.
He needed to know this boy's name more than he needed the air to breathe.
MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE. MERDE.
Sirius was ruined and he had not even met him yet. That's alright this boy could ruin him further any time. MEEERRRDDEEE!!!!.
Hogwarts Express, very farthest from the front of the train, sitting on his bench next to James Potter.
1st, September 1971
Sirius Black was outside their compartment, Peter took note of this for at least he was there, Peter half assumed he would sprint away at some point in their journey to here.
He did however take note of the fact that he was staring at the boy across from him through the window. Another stranger if you will.
Peter and James had tried to get this new boy to open up but alas it seemed impossible, maybe Sirius could though, he looked like he was viewing the most beautiful thing on the planet, which fair he's done that too to the tardis and again who was Peter to judge anyone besides himself?
Sirius was not going to murder this boy that Peter could ascertain for certain.
Beside him James sat continuing to try and bring this boy out of his very closed shell, even the cookies were not helping as they usually did.
He shifted his gaze back unto Sirius and watched.
If he needed time to prepare for his adventure Peter would gladly give him any space he needed. He was afterall a boy, and despite everything he had seen shift so quickly this morning, Sirius was definitely going through a lot at the moment. If space was what he needed space he would get.
There was decidedly little space in their compartment and this was afterall the first 10 minutes of a very long train ride.
And waiting is what Peter did best.
Hogwarts Express, staring through a window of the last train compartment,
1st September 1971
Sirius Black was a whirlwind of confusion, yet for the first time in his life there might be a small hope he could hold on too for himself, he just needed to get his feet in the door for it to work.
He was nervous that much was certain, scared shitless too. There was so much flooding into him at once he wasn’t sure he could survive it all.
He had never had a friend before. And now he would make himself have THREE???????
That number was as foreign as the feelings flooding through him still.
It was the same number of steps Sirius had to take to actually enter the compartment, three was an eternity. He just had to take them.
One.
Two.
Three.
As he took that third step placing himself inside his body lost control and despite his best efforts, Sirius dropped his plate of cookies unable to stop his hands from shaking so severely as they now always did.
This plunged him into an endless stream of hysterics and apologies.
“I am so sorry I didn’t mean to.”
They had gone everywhere.
“I promise I won't make this mistake again, please don't leave me alone”
Everywhere. Sirius was terrified. They were going to hate him forever now.
“ PLEASE NO HEXES”
True now that he ruined it , they were going to be his best friends with his mother.
He froze until assumed James spoke up.
“Why on Merlin would we leave you alone, YOU ARE OUR FRIEND. And more urgent of a question, hex you?”
“My Family has a thorough history creating them do we not?” Sirius said, still shaking inside the compartment.
“Well now I know why you’re murdering your mother.” spoke Peter.
“That's not the exact reason but it's close enough.” Sirius mumbled
Out from the ashes James screeched like a pterodactyl “MURDER MOTHER HOW DARE YOU PETER???”
WITH OF COURSE, the dramatic theatrical performance.
Peter seemed to understand this action and reacted in kind performing a play they had both long since seemed to memorise. They spun into a long awaited performance of a lifetime, one that made Sirius’s joy spark for what seemed like the first time in years.
These two boys were a strange creation to the Black heir, so sure in their actions. Actions that were challenging everything Sirius knew for sure causing an earthquake to rock his world until there was nothing left but rubble.
Sirius watched their duet flooded by a sense of family he had never known before, a lightness, a freedom even.
He saw a future, one filled with hope and even joy.
He had never envisioned this before him, a future too pure and good for someone like him.
He was cursed to live in the darkness as he was suffocated by the silence.
But here… before him… there was a boy filled with hope and belonging, and the boy made of pure sunlight beside him.
The sun and his warmth had chosen him, heir to the darkness and decided then and there to give him a home filled with light.
He was the luckiest boy in the world.
Hogwarts Express, last train compartment at the very back of the train, hiding from the onslaught of boys in the cabin, against the window
1 September, 1971
Remus Lupin was terrified. Intrigued yet terrified.
He had promised his parents he would leave people alone and somehow three other children had made their way into HIS compartment, despite the fact that he was close to the full moon, MERLIN he knew this was dangerous.
He had never been around children before.
To make matters even worse,
The short and devastatingly beautiful boy that had just walked in and dropped all the cookies was Remus Lupin's worst nightmare.
He felt every look the boy shot towards him, could hear every shaky breath this boy took.
Could even feel the radiating terror and rage as if they were his own feelings.
THIS WAS WORSE THAN HIS WORST NIGHTMARE
THIS WAS HIS WORST WORST NIGHTMARE… if that was even possible.
Looking back at the mysterious shadow beside him, Remus was certain that this stranger would be his worst nightmare.
Not breaking the rules, not being stuck in this compartment. Not even the full moon would have such a devastating effect as the boy.
A boy whose name he was willing to reveal anything to find out.
Definitely his worst nightmare indeed, and the first one to be greeted with the tiniest of smiles.
Hogwarts Express, last train compartment at the very back of the train, leading the onslaught of boys
1 September, 1971
James Potter had a mission, now that Pete and him had finished their beautifully scripted performance, and he had successfully met the confident albeit strange Sirius Black, with the added addition that this was directly against his parents demands. Oh HOW GLORIOUS of a meeting.
Well he had his mission, first he had to get Sirius to eat cookies, if not because they cure any temperament but also his hands were shaky, like his fathers when his blood sugar got low. Sirius was most definitely dealing with the same ailment. Of which, mothers cookies had the problem well in hand.
The second he had to be much more deliberate about. The quiet boy in the corner was no longer hiding in the cushions behind him but also not making eye contact with anyone on his side of the compartment, instead staring directly at the person beside him, a Mr. Sirius Black. While at least something was successful at breaking the first barrier down, it was still necessary for cookies to be deployed.
Miraculous cookies that would solidify their burning friendship in chocolate. He just needed to get the cookies in his hands.
Given how he was looking solely at one wizard amongst the group he decided Sirius would be the one to get those cookies to their destination.
Within 15 minutes of this plan being created James was sitting back as it unfolded brilliantly into creation.
Another 15 minutes after the cookies had begun to be tasted, he got the last stranger's name.
Remus Lupin. Mooney would be a good nickname.
And so their adventure began!