Chapter Text
Dongmin was never one to ask much, from a young age he grew up being understanding and docile kid, which is what people that know him at a surface level would say. People that didn't need to nor bother to try to understand him deeper than what they want.
He never understood why no one saw it, it wasnt like he tried to hide it, at least not as a kid. He wasn't any less cranky or demanding than the next kid, sure he didnt rebel or lash out but he was still a kid, he still liked getting his way and wanted what he wished for. He still craved his parents love and attention and though for some reason people seemed to think once his siblings came in hed grow some malice of out compulsion he could only feel love for his siblings. So no dongmin never understood when this preconceived notion that he was some cold hearted, no care, no emotion person came from, but after growing up with those notions forced onto you they do embed themselves into your lives. So yes now if you ask dongmin tends to keep to himself, if to protect himself or just as a way of life even helping couldn't tell you.
One thing you need to know however is that he does care, he cares both in regard to others and himself. So when his mom gave him a gift and put together a great day for dongmin maybe you'd wonder why it mattered to him so much that she hadn't wished him. Just 2 words right? "Happy birthday " he can't tell you why they meant so much either but it was always he little things with him.
So when he realized that his parents wouldn't be able to make it to his graduation it definitely did affect him.
Now he was older and he knows that he can't blame anyone, he doesn't either, he holds no malice nor hurt for his parents.
But he'd be lying if he said it didn't feel like a punch in the stomach, it did bother him, bothered him to the point he found himself talking about it to an older trainee.
Jaehyun is his name, Myung jaehyun, he's relatively new here, a few months or so but he's made it very clear that he's here to stay and his passion and skill speak for themselves. But above all that he just is a star, the kind of person you'd read about in comics, the multiple talented, social, popular guy that somehow is also really sincere and nice?
It didn't make sense to dongmin until he found himself telling the other about his parent's inability to come to the graduation. And when the older offered to come dongmin won't lie he let out a breath and his chest warmed up a bit.
" are you sure you feeling ok? "
( why do you seem to care so deeply )
" If you'll allow me id love to come in their place "
( why would you do that for me )
" its alright, ill finish my schedule and make sure to be there minnie "
( oh you're a kinda heart )
So that's how he ended up here, on the floor of his gymnasium surrounded by familiar faces that are still somehow vague after 3 years. Thats how Dongmin is here, trying his best to not seem like an anxious kitten (thats what Donghyun called him at least) as he looks around the crowd. Each second he looked around while also trying to hold conversation with his friends he could feel his heart sank a bit.
'He must have forgotten' 'is he late' 'where is he' 'maybe he couldn't get out of schedule' 'Don't be stupid dongmin Jaehyun hyung doesn't need to be here, he's was just being nice'
Thoughts ran in his head and he felt his hand sweat a bit, his legs fumble, and his heart tense up.
Then as a lighthouse leads a ship to shore he hears his friend whisper to him "hey I think that guy there is calling for you"
Dongmin turns around faster than hed like to admit and his eyes meet jaehyuns, and he let's out a breath. Suddenly the noise and chatter around him fades a bit, the nerves of this new step in life, as he finishes the last 12 years of his life in one big grand ceremony, the fears of what comes next, the unwarranted excitement and anticipation for what come next all seemed to calm down.
As he watched the older trainee smile and him bouquet in hand and eyes soft, and somehow some part of him knew that it was going to be ok.
As his name got called Dongmin could feel the nerves, each step a testimony of the years he spent, not just at school but training to reach his dream. From the young dongmin that left home to pursue his dreams, living in the dorms, practicing, training for hours. All the late nights staying up with Donghyun as they both had no time to prepare for an exam. Every drop of sweat leading up to this moment. He walked with pride to the stage and smiled his best as he received his certificate. And in the back of his mind he could feel the pride of his older friend, radiating throughout the gym.
Once the ceremony got over he stayed a while with his friends, they joked for one last time in their uniforms and took pictures so they can one-day look back at. He watched as his older friend helped others take pictures and is reminded just how lovable of a person he is. As his friends start to disperse he decides it time to give the other some attention as well, so he walks over to jaehyun saying bye to his friends "CONGRATULATIONS" echos a bit through the gymnasium, earning a few giggles and a taken aback Dongmin. Quickly recovering however he smiles and walks over to the older.
"thanks hyung" i say
"Ya minnie im hurt, all this for just a thank you?"
"Please do you want me to get on my knees in reverence"
"Maybe that would work"
He then is pulled into a hug by the older
"Seriously minnie, congrats"
If you ask dongmin hed tell you very honestly but hugs are not his strong suit, he doesn't hate them despite the rumours, he just isn't used to them. So when he hugs the older back he knows its awkward but neither of them seen to mind. Hes handed a bouquet of flowers.
Dongmin as surprising as it may seem loves the little things, the notes in lunch boxes, tying your friends show so they don't fall. And a bouquet of flowers (they must have cost a fortune) im his hands. He gets lost in them he wants to say thank you but it doesn't seem like the right words, its too formal so instead he just gets lost in them for a second, admiring them and the love that they represent. "Lets go for lunch? My treat to my amazing dongseng" he hears the older say, and choked with emotion all he's able to get out is a soft smile and a nod. Remembering to take a picture because this moment is something dongmin wants to remember.
As they walk out the school it all is rushing in his head, he's graduated, the last 12 years of his life he's spent with school being a constant, all the friends he made the lessons he learnt the memories he created, it was the end of it now. Its scared him honestly, what would the future hold. His passion has been driving him and hopefully hed be debuting and making it big, will it work, will he reach his dreams, will he be able to make his parnets proud, will he earn, who will he debut with, what will people think of him, will people like him.
His thoughts were interrupted by a hand messing with his hair and for a second it pissed him off, until he saw who did it, the older trainee that despite his schedules came for the graduation of a kid he's only known for months, all annoyance faded and all he could feel was gratitude. So here smiled, because that is what jaeyum deserved
"Your smile is pretty, the fans are gonna love it"
"Fans?"
"You know once we debut, i can already see it, 'Han Dongmin the mysterious member who's smile is so bright', you are gonna be a favorite"
"Please have you seen yourself and woonhaks smile, if I was bright you'd be the sun"
They laugh at that and walk in a comfortable silence for a while, the jjangmyeon place a few blocks away. And as thoughts still stormed his brain dongmin couldn't stop himself from asking the older
"Do you think we'll make it hyung"
A few seconds of silence and a smile on the others face later he got a reply
"I don't know minnie, but i do know that the hard work you, me and all the others are putting in will come back to us"
"I think we'll make it hyung, does that make me proud? I think we'll make it big"
He sees the older smile at that
"I think we'll make it too minnie, and no it doesn't make you proud, it makes you hopeful and hope is never a bad thing"
That was all dongmin needed for now, and if he didn't reply cause he didnt know exactly how, he knew the older wouldn't mind
They reached the restaurant and ordered, eating in silence and small talk, it was simple with jaehyun hyung, i think he could tell dongmin needed a second and he never failed to give it to him.
"Hey minni, wheres the bouquet?" There is a pause and the younger can feel his heart pick up and guilt sink in, he scrambles to find the flowers "God i think i left it in the school"
"Ya Han Dongmin those cost me a fortune" jaehyun says between laughs.
"I'll make it up to you hyung im sorry" the younger says seemingly frantic, eyebrow creases in worry and guilt.
"It ok minnie just buy me jjangmyeon at the dorms?" Jaehyun says with a soft smile
"of course hyung im really sorry" the guilt is still there but he knows the older isn't hurt so it tries to settle. As they sit there in comfortable silence theres only one thought on his mind
"I'm glad I came by the way, im glad I could be there for you today"
And if Dongmins eyes got just a tiniest bit teary, and as his smile shone brightly at the words then who was to blame him. He knew then that this wasnt just any graduation.
To jaehyun? To dongmin?This was more than just a graduation, it was a promise, a silent promise between the two of them that was for them to know and them to keep.