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Chapter Text

“Can I ask you a question?” Gyeong Su asked and Cheong San nodded, wrapping a piece of grilled beef in lettuce and he quickly shot a “Go for it” before stuffing the wrap in his mouth, “Did you feel anything when you saw Suhyeok’s smile when you got him that baseball?”

Cheong San coughed, nearly choking on his food and he thumped on his chest to steady himself. Gyeong Su handed him a cup of water and Cheong San drank it down before he coughed out his reply, “W-What do you mean by did I feel anything?”

Gyeong Su plucked a piece of beef from the grill and popped it into his mouth, reiterating the question, “Did you feel anything? Anything at all? When Suhyeok hugged you? When he smiled at you? When you told him that you wanted to make his life complete? Cause I can guarantee you that you were in the moment and you felt something.”

Cheong San cleared his throat and he tried to play it off, “What are you talking about? Those are just things that best friends do and say to each other.”

Gyeong Su shook his head and he called Cheong San out, pointing at him with chopsticks, “You’ve never said that you wanted to make my life complete. Just saying.”

“Do I make your life complete?” Cheong San asked innocently with a cheeky smile and Gyeong Su returned his smile with his own, nodding easily.

“Yes, but that’s besides the point. You wanted to make Suhyeok’s life complete because you felt something, didn’t you? I mean, you basically told him that you wanted to make him happy every day. That’s something that you would say at your wedding.” Gyeong Su hit the nail right on the head and Cheong San stalled in his rebuttal, not really knowing what to say in his defense and he flushed even further to the point he was practically steaming from the “wedding” comment.

“T-That’s not-” Cheong San choked on his lettuce wrap and he swallowed with a bit difficulty before trying to defending himself, “I mean, when I first took Suhyeok into our group, I couldn’t help but feel for him because he didn’t know what it was like to have real friends. He deserves the chance to have people who make him happy. It’s just…” Cheong San wasn’t really sure how to say it without having it sound really sus, but he’s never been one to really think about what he says before it comes out so, “I’m just glad that it’s me that makes him happy.”

“And what are the rest of us? Chopped liver?” Gyeong Su countered back easily with a smile, popping a tteokbokki into his mouth and Cheong San groaned and he retorted back.

“That’s not what I meant and you know it.” Cheong San argued back in irritation and Gyeong Su knew his next question would really get the other’s gears turning in his head.

“Ok, so let me get this straight (not), me and the boys also make him happy, that doesn’t bother you, right?” Gyeong Su asked just to clarify, trying to establish the difference between the happiness privileges of all of their friends.

“No, you guys are also his friends.” Cheong San answered and Gyeong Su continued, hoping that this would go in the right direction.

“How about Onjo and Namra?” Gyeong Su tacked on and Cheong San answered just as promptly with “Sure, they’re his friends too.”

“But they’re both going to confess to him with my help and one of them’s going to make him happier than you can.” Gyeong Su proposed the threat right then and there, eyeing Cheong San’s reaction, which was about what he expected: nervous and trying to use that energy to power his combativeness, but it was only going to end in what Gyeong Su would describe as a car stalling despite the ignition being turned on, “And that bothers you, doesn’t it? Otherwise, you wouldn’t be asking me to help you stop Onjo from confessing to Bare-su if you weren’t and now you have Namra to contend with too.”

That seemed to do it for Cheong San and instead of actually confronting his feelings, he immediately defaulted to his favorite defense mechanism: procrastination and pettiness.

Cheong San took a big lettuce wrap that he prefilled with a lot of pork belly and stuffed it in his mouth so he couldn’t talk, but he tried to give his response anyway, “Aie hwon hwanna olk bout is anmore.”

Gyeong Su leaned forward to try to get a better sense of what Cheong San was trying to say, “Sorry, what did you say?” but Cheong San wasn’t done chewing and he still gave a pretty intelligible response, “San-ah! Chew your food man and talk to me!”

Cheong San finally swallowed his food and he said his answer quite plainly, “I don’t wanna talk about this anymore.” Beckoning a waiter over with his hand, Cheong San employed the second step of his defense mechanism: pettiness, “I’d like to pay for my half of the bill, my friend can pay the rest.”

Gyeong Su dropped his chopsticks and he immediately called his best friend out, “Yah! You said you were gonna treat me out for agreeing to help you!”

“I changed my mind. You’re on your own, buddy.” Cheong San snapped his wallet shut, paying for his half of the meal and he winked at his best friend before wishing him luck and slipping out of his seat, “Enjoy the rest of your dinner, Su.”

“YAH! LEE CHEONG SAN, YOU WOULDN’T!!!” Gyeong Su stuffed his mouth with one more lettuce wrap filled with BBQ meat before he packed up his things and chased after Cheong San, who hightailed it out of the rest of the restaurant, laughing at his best friend yelling after him.

(Cheong San ended up paying for the other half, as he promised.)

Laying in his room at night, Cheong San stared at the ceiling, wondering about Gyeong Su’s questions and what his thoughts were. It’s been long enough that Cheong San’s eyes adjusted to the darkness and he looked over to his bedside table where a framed photo stood. Reaching over to turn on the lamp, Cheong San then picked up the frame and tilted it slightly so that the sheen of the light moved to reveal that it was a picture of him and Suhyeok. It was a photo that he and Suhyeok took together at the Seum Wolves game last year; the Christmas where Cheong San went above and beyond to get Suhyeok an autographed baseball from his favorite batter. The two of them were close to the camera, pressing their heads together and Suhyeok was holding the autographed baseball between them while Cheong San was wearing that poofy hat that was shaped like a gray wolf head, posing cutely with his wolf paws up.

“Sannie, look here.” Suhyeok held his phone camera up and looped his arm around Cheong San’s shoulders to pull him close and then he moved his hand back to hold the baseball between them. Cheong San decided to be cute and he leaned slightly closer to Suhyeok, slipping his hands into the little paws that dangled from his cute wolf hat and he posed for the photo. Then, Cheong San felt a little weight on the right side of his head and looking up at the camera, he realized that Suhyeok was leaning his head right on top of the poofy hat. Without taking a moment to think about the warm feeling that flooded throughout Cheong San’s body, Suhyeok snapped the photo with that jubilant smile that could make anyone melt.

Cheong San could still feel that warmth when he thought about how Suhyeok snuggled against his hat and how much he liked the feeling. He wasn’t sure what that said about him though because the more Cheong San thought about Suhyeok laying his head on top of his, the more flustered he made himself and he wasn’t even doing anything. Then, his phone rang rather loudly and Cheong San nearly dropped the photo out of surprise. Quickly placing the photo back, Cheong San saw that it was Suhyeok calling him, speak of the devil.

Sliding the answer button over, Cheong San was immediately met with a slightly annoyed Suhyeok, “Lee Cheong San, you’re a terrible friend, you know that? You went out for barbecue without me?”

Cheong San opened his mouth to say something in his defense and nothing came out for a moment, but he did manage to get something out, “I was treating Gyeong Su out for helping me out with a favor-”

“But you could have invited me too. You never treat me out anywhere.” Suhyeok softly cut him off, his voice coming out like a whine before Cheong San could finish his sentence, but luckily, the latter still had ammunition to counter the former.

“Not true, I treat you to fried chicken at my mom’s place all the time.” Cheong San sat up in his bed to better situate himself to talk to Suhyeok, fixing his hair as he did so (he noticed that Suhyeok just watched him as he ruffled his hair with this odd look. Or maybe Cheong San was imagining it).

“Yeah and because of that, you’ve nearly made it impossible for me to maintain my figure.” Suhyeok then did something that made Cheong San almost choke on air. He lifted his shirt slightly to show Cheong San the lower half of his stomach and he could see the defined lines of his abs and top of his V-line peeking just above his shorts. Why the hell did Suhyeok choose to wear such loose shorts? Was he doing this on purpose? As quickly as he lifted his shirt, Suhyeok dropped it and Cheong San nearly found himself at a loss of words.

He’s seen Suhyeok shirtless before and it’s… mostly never bothered him before. The guy’s objectively good-looking and he had the summer body that most girls (and guys) would drool over, Cheong San had to admit it. Truthfully, Cheong San respected his best friend and he actually admired it too, but he swore that it was mostly out of respect and appreciation. Mostly.

“You know my body’s a temple Cheong San-ah, so you’re gonna have to take responsibility for spoiling me so much.” Suhyeok teased Cheong San, who was still in the process of coming up with something to say to that because there had to be some sort of heterosexual explanation for his utter loss of words right?

“I-I don’t ever think about your body.” Cheong San nearly stuttered but he figured that Suhyeok caught it anyway judging by the amused look on his face. Continuing on, Cheong San tried to defend himself still, “And besides, you love my mom’s place and she loves having you over, so I think that’s your personal choice to ruin your temple.”

Resting his head down on his propped up hand, Suhyeok smiled sweetly at Cheong San and the latter suddenly wished he would stop smiling at him like that, “True enough, and your mom loves me, so I can’t possibly refuse her.” Suhyeok’s smile then relaxed, that teasing air about him dissipating and he asked gently, “Did you eat well? You didn’t eat too early right? I know how sensitive your stomach gets when you eat too soon before your track meets.”

Taking a moment to let that sink in, Cheong San shifted his jaw in acute observation, thinking about the fact that Suhyeok knew that he would get cramps if he ate too soon before his track meets. That’s why sometimes, when Suhyeok would accompany him to his meetings, he would offer to carry Cheong San off the track when his stomach (quite literally) gave him shit for eating too early.

Fighting a smile from coming onto his face, Cheong San nodded like an obedient kid and he replied back, “Nah, I had that as my dinner. It was pretty good, so I’ll invite you next time, I promise.”

Suhyeok’s smile grew a little wider at Cheong San’s promise and he let it go, moving to another conversation and that was the beginning of a long string of different topics. They were talking for hours on end and that was when Suhyeok finally noticed the picture on Cheong San’s bedside table in the background, “Hey, isn’t that our photo from last Christmas? When you got me Jihoon’s home run ball?”

Cheong San paused whatever rant he was immersed in to look at the photo in question and he immediately smiled at the sight of it. Picking it up from the table and presenting it to Suhyeok, Cheong San pulled an expression of slight confusion because, “You’ve been to my house before, you know that I have it there.”

Suhyeok nodded and he continued to smile fondly at the picture as well as the subject of that picture that was currently holding it, “Mmhm, I just like the fact that it’s there.”

There was an indescribable fondness in Suhyeok’s voice and Cheong San wasn’t sure if he wanted to read more into it or not. Although why would he? It just has great sentimental value, that’s all. It’s not as if the photo was proof that their feelings run a lot deeper than they initially thought. That’s totally not it.

“So… have you gotten the details about your request from the Mistletoe Envoy?” Cheong San decided to ask and Suhyeok reacted with this rather easy but coy look that immediately told the former that he wasn’t going to say zilch.

“I have, but I’m still not gonna tell you what they are or who it’s for.” Suhyeok answered and Cheong San nodded, not really wanting to push any further and Suhyeok must have noticed the look on his face because it almost seemed like disappointment, “Sannie, is that jealousy I’m detecting?”

Cheong San blinked back into focus as if he were about to entertain the idea of wanting Suhyeok’s request to be about him and he bit his lip for a moment before carefully crafting his response. Leaning his head down on his hand and mirroring Suhyeok’s pose, Cheong San tried to be as honest as possible, “Hyeokie, whoever your request is for, I think they’re really lucky to have you. Whoever it is, they’re about to gain a really funny, down-to-earth, and caring person who would never leave someone hanging. Who could ever refuse you? You’re amazing and I’m really happy for you.”

Maybe it was because his voice was cracking slightly in his gentle but impassioned speech, but Cheong San didn’t think he was gonna get emotional saying all of this. Suhyeok has always had his back and why wouldn’t he have his? He wasn’t gonna cry because of this, right? These were just Christmas grams for raising charity for the school. So why was it so hard to say all these nice things about Suhyeok when he absolutely meant them?

“San-ah, are you ok?” Suhyeok asked softly, noticing the wavering in his voice and his eyes were just so full of concern and something else that Cheong San couldn’t decipher for the life of him. Why the hell was Cheong San thinking there was something else, something more behind those warm chocolate eyes?

“Yeah, I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be?” Cheong San asked casually, quickly masking his momentary lapse in judgment.

Suhyeok stared at him through the phone for another couple of seconds and Cheong San wasn’t really sure if he bought his cover-up but it didn’t seem like the other boy was going to press him for details.

“Alright. I’m gonna head off to bed first. Sweet dreams, Sunshine.” Suhyeok yawned and he bid Cheong San goodbye, but he waited for Cheong San to say the same.

A brief but powerful emotion flashed through Cheong San the moment Suhyeok called him “Sunshine”. Cheong San didn’t think he ever heard Suhyeok use that nickname before and another wave of emotion made him tense for a moment before he bid Suhyeok good night, “Night, Bare-su. Get some rest, ok?”

Suhyeok nodded and he ended the call, leaving Cheong San alone in his room again. Letting his hand with his phone fall to his lap, Cheong San sighed and he laid back in his bed, thinking about that nickname once again. It sounds close to the second half of his name and Cheong San wondered if Suhyeok meant to do that on purpose. Nonetheless, he liked it. He liked it so much that Cheong San wondered if he had to answer some questions about himself to answer why he liked it so much.

Stuffing his head below his blanket, Cheong San burrowed himself into his pillow and let out one gleeful and muffled squeal before willing himself to sleep for tomorrow. Tomorrow would be the start of his downward spiral into what could be his biggest trainwreck ever.

When morning came, Cheong San reminded himself that today was the day Gyeong Su was going to start helping all of the students fulfill their wishes, and he also reminded himself that he was going to help Gyeong Su do it too. Good grief. Cheong San laid in bed for a couple more moments, letting the circumstances sour his mood before he snapped himself out of it and got up.

“Alright, let’s do this.” Cheong San told himself as he swung himself out of bed and got ready for school.

After getting ready for the school day, Cheong San did his daily routine with Onjo, although he did act a little more weirdly than usual. He wondered if Onjo would notice that he was nervous, but she didn’t really say anything. They got to school, went their separate ways before class started and right then, as Cheong San looked around for a certain tall, handsome, and sun-kissed friend, his vision was obscured by two hands.

“Guess who?” A deep voice asked and Cheong San tilted his head slightly as if he were actually thinking about it. He knew who it was. He did this sometimes when he’s in a good mood, which was almost always.

“Ohhh… Gyeong Su-ah? Is that you? I thought we agreed to meet at the front.” Cheong San decided to tease him just a little bit and the other person replied back.

“Think taller. A lot taller.” The voice replied back just as teasingly and the corner of Cheong San’s mouth lifted up into a smirk.

“Low blow… literally…” Cheong San joked, hearing a chuckle behind him, and he continued their little guessing game, “Taller huh? Hmmm… Woo Jin-ah? You rarely do this, so this is a pleasant surprise.”

“Pleasant surprise my ass. He’s done this before?” The voice asked back, a playful edge to it that made Cheong San wonder if he was actually half-joking or if he was actually offended.

“Oh? So it’s not you, Woo Jin-ah?” Cheong San asked coyly, already knowing the answer and he felt the person behind him clasp his hands just a little harder as if he were telling him “give me one more smart-ass answer, I dare you”. Laughing slightly, Cheong San was about to reach up to take the hands off his eyes before the person said something else.

“Think more good-looking.” The person said with an air of confidence, his voice going a little lower and Cheong San hoped that he wouldn’t be able to feel the shiver that went down his spine at that. Luckily, Cheong San already knew how to counter back to push the other person’s buttons.

“More good-looking than Woo Jin? Hmm… I can’t think of anyone else at our school besides me, of course.” Cheong San said tactfully and he felt the person behind him jostle him playfully. Laughing almost out loud by now from the play-fighting, Cheong San finally relented and he called out to his friend, “Alright, alright! Bare-su, I know it’s you!”

“You really are a terrible friend,” Suhyeok let go of Cheong San’s eyes and stepped around him so the latter could see him, “Insinuating that Woo Jin’s better-looking than me?” Cheong San was about to apologize for his teasing, but the words stopped in his throat when he looked at his friend.

“Did you do something with your hair?” Cheong San noticed that Suhyeok’s hair wasn’t combed back with gel like it usually was, but he let it down and had it parted slightly so it created a little oval opening in his bangs. It was still combed, but it looked a whole lot nicer; Cheong San always told him that he looked better with his hair down and using just a bit of product goes a long way. Looking at it now, it fit Suhyeok’s head shape perfectly and Cheong San had to admire how silky his hair looked. Even though Suhyeok wasn’t keen on changing his look, he did say that he was willing to change it if he felt like it. Granted, Cheong San knew that Suhyeok would look good no matter the style he chose, but he just wasn’t expecting his suggestion to look so much better in reality.

“Indeed I did, thank you for noticing. I want to look my best when the confessions happen this week.” Suhyeok beckoned Cheong San to walk with him and the latter fell in stride with him as they headed towards the front of the school.

“Are you expecting a lot of them? I figure that half of the female population at our school wants you for Christmas.” Cheong San said with an almost bitter lilt to his voice, hoping that it wouldn’t show, but Suhyeok seemed to catch it.

“Is it just me or do you sound a bit annoyed?” Suhyeok asked and Cheong San blanched for a moment before he thought about what he was actually annoyed at. He was gonna be annoyed at the sheer amount of confessions he was going to ruin. He already felt bad enough for it and he was totally not annoyed at the fact that it was going to be a bunch of girls confessing to Suhyeok specifically.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Cheong San said quickly and nonchalantly before explaining himself just as quickly, “I’m just worried about the poor girls who think they have a chance with you when you already have your eye on somebody, and don’t worry, I’m not gonna ask who it is.”

It was silent for a moment and Cheong San looked at Suhyeok to see why he wasn’t responding to see that he was already looking at him, “What?”

“I get what you mean. It’s gonna get really chaotic this year. A lot of people are going to get their hearts broken, but some people are going to get real lucky too.” Suhyeok finally said, an emotion that Cheong San couldn’t decipher in his voice and he was about to comment on the weird pause before his response, but his instincts decided against it.

“You have no idea…” Cheong San mumbled under his breath and Suhyeok asked him if he said something because he didn’t hear it. Shaking his head, Cheong San plastered on a smile and replied back, “Kinda makes me wonder if the Mistletoe Envoy was lying about their perfect satisfaction record, but I guess we’ll find out this week.” Cheong San sighed before continuing onwards with Suhyeok, who slung an arm over his shoulder in his usual affectionate fashion and the two of them returned to their usual banter for the day.

Later that day, when it was their free period, Cheong San met up with Gyeong Su to begin his crusade of sabotage. There was a good chance he was going to ruin his reputation and make many girls hate him for this, but this is all for the sake of… preserving the norm. The status quo? Whatever the heck Cheong San was trying to protect with this admittedly douchey plan of his. The first condition was that he’d help with the wishes that don’t have anything to do with Suhyeok and the second condition was that he was on his own when it came to the sabotage. Gyeong Su told him that he was going to abide by his principles and help the students with their wishes to the best of his ability, to which Cheong San wondered when his best friend became someone of such high moral principle, but to each his own. Therefore, for the second condition, Cheong San was on his own for the means of sabotage.

According to Gyeong Su, the first girl of the day who was going to confess to Suhyeok was Hyeon Ju, one of the bullies in Gwi-Nam’s gang… or clique… Cheong San wasn’t really sure what the group should be called, but it was essentially a group of assholes. She was apparently going to get Suhyeok alone during the free period and confess to him with some sort of assortment of baked goods, a classic seduction tactic. A good way to get to a boy’s heart is through his stomach.

Maybe on second thought, Cheong San was going to enjoy ruining her confession.

Hyeon Ju managed to get Suhyeok alone in a hallway thanks to Gyeong Su’s help (to which Cheong San still didn’t know why Gyeong Su decided to help her when she should definitely be on the naughty list) and when the coast was supposedly clear, that’s when she made her move. Meanwhile, Cheong San was running with their location with a party in tow.

“So? Hyeon Ju? Did you want to tell me something? I know we haven’t talked in a while.” Suhyeok said respectfully and although he left their group a long time ago, wanting absolutely nothing to do with them anymore, he still wanted to maintain a manner of decorum.

“Actually, Suhyeok-ah, what I wanted to tell you was-” Hyeon Ju was about to say when a commotion broke out down the hallway and both of them looked in the direction of the sound to find Cheong San sprinting towards them at record speed with a whole gang of people following him, “What the-”

Pretending to notice Suhyeok there in the hallway, Cheong San called out to him for help, “Yah yah yah! Hyeokie! Help!”

Watching as his best friend caught up to him only to hide behind him, Suhyeok immediately spread his arm out to keep Gwi-Nam from reaching around him and grabbing Cheong San, “Woah… woah woah, what’s going on? Sannie, what did you do?”

“LEE CHEONG SAN! Take back what you said about my mom right now!” Gwi-Nam roared at Cheong San, who replied back with his classic smart-ass snark.

“To be fair, I didn’t think you’d actually care about your mom’s honor, but here we are. And besides! You’re the one who insulted my mom first!” Cheong San said quickly before hiding behind Suhyeok again and Gwi-Nam made another lunge for him, but the taller boy stopped in his tracks, effectively protecting the boy behind him.

Then, Gwi-Nam noticed Hyeon Ju standing there in shock of the situation developing before her and he looked between her and Suhyeok, trying to put together what they were doing here together, “Hyeon Ju-ah? What the hell are you doing here with him?”

“Oh… That’s…” Hyeon Ju tried to come up with an excuse and Cheong San looked between her and Gwi-Nam, noticing the box of baked goods behind her back. She hid that right when Gwi-Nam got here and given the terse tone of voice from him, Cheong San could surmise that-

“Ohhh… Hyeon Ju, are you not satisfied with Gwi-Nam as a lover?” Cheong San gained enough confidence to straighten up and lean his elbow on Suhyeok’s shoulder as he put his sabotage in motion. Hyeon Ju’s eyes widened in alarm and Gwi-Nam’s in indignation as Cheong San continued to expertly press their buttons, “Wait- were you here to present those pastries to Bare-su as a gift? Aren’t you and Gwi-Nam dating or something?”

Hyeon Ju stammered and if looks could kill, Cheong San probably would have been dead, but he was leisurely standing next to the object of her affections and leaning on him at that.

“Wait, I thought you made those for me! You told me that just the other day! And now you’re switching to Suhyeok of all people?!” Gwi-Nam exclaimed, starting to bristle with anger towards both Hyeon Ju and Cheong San.

“Oooohhh… Those were meant for someone else? Yah, Hyeon Ju, I’m pretty sure Suhyeok would appreciate something new and not those sloppy seconds.” Cheong San noted and Hyeon Ju tried to defend herself as the tables had somehow turned on her.

“These aren’t sloppy! They’re new! I just made them from the recipe that the Mistletoe Envoy sent me!” Hyeon Ju said and Cheong San decided to take that one brave step further in pissing everyone off.

“Those aren’t the sloppy seconds I’m referring to.” Cheong San replied smoothly, his voice containing an edge of condescension and disdain and it took only a moment for Suhyeok to realize what he meant by that comment and his eyes widened considerably, almost bugging out from the realization. Whipping his head towards Cheong San, who seemed unbothered by what he just said, Suhyeok couldn’t help but let his jaw drop open in awe that he even had the balls to say that out loud. It seemed that the others also figured out what Cheong San meant at around the same time and Hyeon Ju nearly dropped her box from the insinuation.

“Yah, Cheong San, you- YAHHH!!!! HOW DARE YOU-” Hyeon Ju practically blew up at Cheong San, who flinched back in reflex and he smiled inwardly at how well this was working.

“Hey, I don’t want to get in the middle of whatever open relationship this is,” Cheong San gestured flippantly between Hyeon Ju and Gwi-Nam with his hand and he continued, “but just to add some levity to this situation, I also pissed off your boyfriend with a couple of jokes. Do you want to hear them?”

Gwi-Nam’s eyes widened and before he could get a word in, Hyeon Ju snapped back at Cheong San with sharp indignation, “What makes you think I want to hear them?!”

“Cheong San, I dare you to say them again. I dare you.” Gwi-Nam said through gritted teetha nd Suhyeok just stood there, clueless as to what was happening and he looked back to Cheong San, who still had that confident smile on his face. Just from how close they were, Suhyeok had a perfect view of Cheong San’s dimple and he felt his breath almost get taken away just from the sight alone.

“Sure.” Cheong San said with an absolute willingness to stir shit up, “Your mom is so fat, that if she were to stand at the peak of Mt. Everest, she’d turn it into the Mariana Trench in two seconds.”

Suhyeok blanched at the “your mom” joke and he had to fight a chuckle from escaping him because this really wasn’t the time to be laughing.

Gwi-Nam seethed and he made one more warning to Cheong San although the latter was surprised that the former was still letting him say any of this, “Cheong San, I’m warning you. One more joke comes out of your mouth and you’re dead.”

“Your mom is so fat, that if she were to jump into the ocean, she’d flood the entire Korean peninsula, Japan, and half of the Asian continent.” Cheong San continued, the delivery of his joke so deadpan and unserious that Suhyeok audibly snorted and everyone heard it.

“I’m sorry.” Suhyeok said quickly before trying to curb his laughter and it failed spectacularly when Gwi-Nam practically screamed at Cheong San.

“CHEONG SAN!!!!! YOU’RE FUCKING DEAD!!!!!”

With that, Gwi-Nam lunged for Cheong San again and the other boy dodged, letting go of Suhyeok and he proceeded to say yet another “your mom” joke, “Your mom is so fat, she creates tectonic plates with every step!”

“CHEONG SAN!!! COME HERE!!!”

“Your mom is so fat, she puts the planet in Planet Fitness!”

Suhyeok could probably tell you how this ended, but he couldn’t even see by the end of Cheong San’s tirade of jokes. Hell, he was even starting to cry tears of laughter as Cheong San kept going with the jokes.

“Gwi-Nam! Don’t dish out what you can’t take! That’s what you get for making fun of my mom’s chicken restaurant!” Cheong San called out as he sprinted further down the hallway and out of sight with the whole gang including Hyeon Ju following him.

“Cheong San! You’re gonna pay for that sloppy seconds comment!”

The whole free period and also lunch was basically like this for Cheong San: Gyeong Su would give him the intel on who’s confessing to Suhyeok, Cheong San would come up with a plan to stop the girl, and rinse and repeat. So far, Cheong San has been successful in making everything look like an accident, keeping the spontaneity in each respective situation. The only one where Cheong San could say that it looked deliberately planned was probably Hyeon Ju’s because he pissed everyone off on purpose.

Soon, the first day of deterring girls was over and Cheong San couldn’t run out of school fast enough because he must have foiled the plans of probably a dozen girls, and that was only the first day. He did wear disguises so as to not tip anyone off about what he was doing, but there’s only so much he can do. Not to mention Cheong San also had to help Gyeong Su with the other requests and he was putting on concerts every 15 minutes. (He made sure that Suhyeok didn’t find out that he was helping the Mistletoe Envoy).

“Wow. I’m impressed. You managed to sabotage every single girl who wanted to confess to Suhyeok today.” Gyeong Su looked through the list on his spreadsheet, reading the scathing reviews of dissatisfaction and he let out a heavy sigh before looking at Cheong San, “Have you considered telling Suhyeok your feelings? Because if this keeps up, they’re gonna connect the dots sooner or later and they’ll be after you.”

“I can sacrifice my reputation if it means Suhyeok can find someone who’s good enough for him.” Cheong San replied, stretching his arms above his head before letting them fall down by his side and he picked up the pace on their way back home. Gyeong Su pulled an expression of exasperation because he could tell that Cheong San was avoiding the question and he caught up with him again.

“Yah, you haven’t answered my question! After one day of doing this, have you thought about why you’re going through all this trouble?” Gyeong Su stopped Cheong San, stepping in front of him and the latter looked away from him for a moment before matching his gaze, “Onjo and Namra are planning their confessions for later this week and you’re still willing to stop both of them? How is that fair to Suhyeok? He can’t be tied to us forever!”

“Yah! Who said I was going to stop Namra?” Cheong San retorted with a hint of anger to his voice and Gyeong Su relented when his reply registered in his mind.

“Wait, you’re not going to stop Namra?” Gyeong Su asked to clarify and after a long, tense moment, Cheong San shook his head as if he were giving up. He didn’t think Cheong San would actually give up, especially when it seemed like he wasn’t going to let anyone confess to Suhyeok.

“Why would I? I mean, Bare-su obviously meant her when he revealed that he had a person in mind for this whole holiday request thing and it’s so obvious that she likes him back. Every time I sabotaged a girl today, Suhyeok would just spend his time with Namra, so I’m basically doing him a favor.”

“Only because he couldn’t find you after every hit-and-run you committed.” Gyeong Su inwardly replied to Cheong San’s rant and he tried to coax him into admitting his feeling again because at this rate, he might actually lose his chance, “Cheong San-ah, were you hoping that it’d be someone else? You say that Bare-su obviously meant Namra, which implies that there’s an off chance that it’s someone else who’s not as obvious.”

Cheong San bit his lip and he haphazardly tried to defend himself, “I-I’m not implying anything. I’m not hoping that it’s anything. The choice is obvious! And he should be with her!”

“Cheong San-ah, sometimes, even though the choice is obvious, that doesn’t make it the right choice. Are you seriously not going to make yourself a choice?” Gyeong Su asked seriously and a flash of hurt appeared within Cheong San’s expression. Closing his eyes for just a moment, Cheong San thought about the sudden bout of fear and jealousy that he’s been feeling throughout this entire thing. He really shouldn’t be feeling these emotions. If he’s scared of losing Suhyeok, doesn’t that just mean their bond isn’t as strong as he thought?

“Even if it does turn out to be her, don’t you owe it to yourself to at least say something?” Gyeong Su asked, hoping that this would tip Cheong San over the edge and when Cheong San finally opened his eyes again, there was something in his eyes that told Gyeong Su that he wasn’t willing to give in yet, “Come on dude…”

“Su, you know me, I kept my feelings for Onjo a secret for pretty much my whole life. Honestly, I was willing to hide it from her until graduation. This time’s no different. In fact, it might be worse because we’re both guys!” Cheong San said with such pitiful amusement at the whole situation. Perhaps it was a combination of a bunch of different fears, but the thing Cheong San was scared of the most was ruining what they have right now.

“Dude, you know that Bare-su wouldn’t judge you for that. He adores you! The guy’s been vying for my position as your best friend ever since you two became friends!” Gyeong Su said with a slight hint of bitterness because it may very well come true, but that’s not the point here, “But dare I say that this is different from your feelings for Onjo.”

Cheong San stayed silent, letting Gyeong Su go on with his speech because he was curious as to what he would say, “You were content with caring for her from a distance and it probably would have taken a world ending event to get you to admit your feelings.”

Cheong San grimaced at the thought because he wouldn’t want to wait until the end of the world to finally say something, although that does sound like something he would do, “With Suhyeok, you’re different. Think about what you just said: ‘it might be worse because we’re both guys.’ All of these emotions that you’re feeling are new and it’s ok to be scared of them and even make excuses for them. However, that doesn’t change the fact that you’re acting differently because it’s Suhyeok. Imagine if it were Onjo. If a bunch of guys confessed to Onjo, you probably would have taken yourself out of the game under the pretense that her happiness is the most important thing to you.”

“It’s the same with Suhyeok, isn’t it? I’m not planning on confessing to Suhyeok nor do I have anything to confess. Gyeong Su-ah, for the last time, I’m letting Namra do it, but I’m just trying to spare Onjo and everyone else the pain of being rejected.” Cheong San tried to explain, the exasperation starting to build within him because when was the last time he went back and forth with Gyeong Su this much?

“Including yourself?” Gyeong Su asked and Cheong San groaned loudly, throwing his hands up and he turned around from a moment to mask his momentary frustration before deciding to show it to his best friend anyway.

“Ok! Maybe?! Maybe I am afraid of getting rejected and ruining everything! But I am telling you there’s no room for debate! Namra is who Suhyeok should choose and I’ll be happy for him either way.” Cheong San insisted, not really sure if he even believed what was coming out of his mouth. It was so hard to get out, but he could bear the burden. Whether it was the burden of lying or watching from afar or sacrificing one’s own happiness, Cheong San somehow found all of them to be so easy to do.

“You really are the most stubborn bastard I know. But fine! Don’t come whining to me when I help Namra win Suhyeok over and I hope for your sake that you don’t regret letting him go.” Gyeong Su said as the last thing before he continued their walk home without Cheong San. Looking after Gyeong Su, Cheong San tried one last time to reaffirm his stance even though he knew it was waning.

“I never had him in the first place!”

“Really? Cause to me, you had him since the beginning!” Gyeong Su called over his shoulder and Cheong San let out a “tch” under his breath, wondering when the other boy had such witty comebacks. Catching up to Gyeong Su, they walked home together and they switched topics again, which Cheong San was grateful for because one more thought about “having Suhyeok” and he might just explode.

The following days after that were pretty much the same. Cheong San foiled a bunch of girls and the occasional guy who wanted to confess to Suhyeok. To be honest, he didn’t realize just how many people have been touched by Suhyeok’s knightly charm and charismatic personality. As to that occasional guy, Cheong San commended him for even being brave enough to try. A lagging thought started to form at the back of his mind that was along the lines of: “If he could do it? Why can’t you?”

It’s because Cheong San stands to lose more than him. It’s precisely because Cheong San is Suhyeok’s best friend that he can’t bring himself to do it.

Then, the dreaded day came when Onjo was going to confess to Suhyeok and apparently, according to Gyeong Su, she was going to do it right before they had their free period. Meaning, it was going to be in class and-

“She’s making it public?! In front of everyone?! Why the hell would she do that?!” Cheong San read Gyeong Su’s report in detail and he looked around to see if anyone was listening. Gyeong Su had a rather conflicted look on his face as they both contemplated on how to intervene.

“If I had to guess, she’s trying to make it hard for him to reject her, but I’m not sure how well that’s gonna turn out.” Gyeong Su offered a guess and Cheong San let out a groan through his gritted teeth and he racked his brain for ideas as well as the ethical intricacies of stopping his childhood best friend from embarrassing herself in front of the entire class.

“And she’s giving him her name tag right then and there?! Good grief, someone please put me out of my misery.” Cheong San scrunched his eyes closed and shook the report as if he were trying to strangle the paper like a person.

“I think Onjo might do it if you stop her from confessing.” Gyeong Su replied with a somewhat amused smile because he wondered how Cheong San was going to stop her. It’s gonna be really really hard and Gyeong Su figured that Cheong San would have to do something really drastic to do it. Also, it’s really funny to see Cheong San think this hard; if only he could do the same for his studies.

After another moment of Cheong San tweaking out over how genuinely horrible this plan was, he somehow had an epiphany, “Wait…”

“I know that look in your eyes. You got something. What is it?” Gyeong Su asked, but Cheong San shook his head and looked back at him with that familiar determined glint in his eyes.

“If I tell you, you’re definitely gonna stop me. So just trust and everything will be alright.” Cheong San quickly took a picture of Onjo’s plan and he gave Gyeong Su a wink before handing back the report, making his way back to class without waiting for his friend.

“Wait! Yah! What the hell are you going to do?!” Gyeong Su ran after Cheong San, not getting a single peep out of the other boy.

Luckily, Cheong San somehow managed to formulate a plan before class started and to give a hint, it has something to do with one of the Mistletoe Envoy requests. There was a request in another class to do this impromptu musical number to woo a girl using her favorite song and given that other class was on the other side of the school, Cheong San could use that request to his advantage. He was going to make a musical spectacle so big to distract Onjo from confessing to Suhyeok and shift the impending humiliation to himself.

As the time drew closer, Cheong San watched Onjo carefully and he noticed that she definitely seemed nervous and had something big prepared for Suhyeok. As he thought about it throughout class, Cheong San knew that Onjo deserved to make her confession to Suhyeok, and he agonized whether he would let her do it or not. However, when the inevitable happens, regardless of what happens, Cheong San will be there to cushion the crushing blow. There was one thought that did nag at him and it was: “What is Suhyeok going to think?”.

Shaking his head slightly to snap out of it, Cheong San knew where that question was going to lead.

Soon enough, it was time and Cheong San watched Onjo reach into her bag and pull out an intricate box. It was definitely a Christmas gift and Cheong San glanced over at Suhyeok behind him to see that he was talking to Namra about something. To be honest, Cheong San had been avoiding Suhyeok for the past few days because of all the sabotaging and granting Christmas wishes. Suhyeok did confront him once about it and Cheong San came clean about the granting wishes part. However, Suhyeok still hasn’t seen him in action so Cheong San squirmed in his seat over the thought of Suhyeok seeing him perform. Now, because of all that, Suhyeok has been spending more and more time with Namra.

Grimacing slightly at the thought, Cheong San was still deliberating whether to do it now or wait until after Onjo makes her confession. Unfortunately, he had to make a split second decision because Onjo was going to do it right now. He saw her signal to her helpers that were waiting outside the classroom and he weighed everything in that split second.

Cheong San knew that Suhyeok never really talked much about Onjo and nothing they ever talked about came close to his feelings for her, even when they did talk about that stuff. It was clear that Suhyeok didn’t feel the same way about her, but she’s still insisting on using the Mistletoe Envoy (Gyeong Su) to better her chances at winning Suhyeok over. He also wanted to think about what Onjo wanted, which was to confess her feelings and hopefully gain Suhyeok as a boyfriend this Christmas season.

He didn’t want to waste her efforts, but either way, they’re going to be wasted.

Suhyeok likes Namra. There’s no question about it.

Cheong San bit his lip and he looked over to Jimin (He filled her in on the situation and she surprisingly agreed to help him, so he had complete faith she’d be able to help him because she’s in choir), who caught his eye and was waiting for his signal.

Screw it. It’s now or never.

Quickly slipping his hand into his bag, he got the two things he needed: the sparkly red bow-tie to replace his green one and his microphone. Putting his red bow-tie on, he gave the signal and Jimin winked before bringing out the portable speaker and right when Onjo stood up, he stood up even faster.

Jimin put on the instrumentals to “Heart on the Window” by Jin & WENDY and Cheong San spoke up to get Onjo’s attention along with everyone else, “Onjo-ah!” Onjo whipped around with an expression of utter surprise, jaw dropping lower when she realized what he was doing, “I wanted to dedicate this song to you in order to convey my earnest and passionate feelings for you.”

The whole class besides a few select people let out a loud coo of “OOOHHH!!” and Cheong San inwardly cringed because this was definitely something he may not recover from. A good amount of people in his class already knew how he felt about Onjo and yet now, Cheong San was conflicted to say that he was doing this for different reasons. Gyeong Su was in shock at what he was doing and Cheong San didn’t dare look at what Suhyeok’s expression was.

Onjo finally managed to regain the ability to talk and she just had to ask, “Cheong San-ah, what are you doing? I was-”

Feeling that immediate blow to his courage, Cheong San still resolved to keep going because he had to stop her before she got her feelings hurt, “I know what you’re going to do. I suspected it when you told me that you were going to get the Mistletoe Envoy’s help, but I wanted to let you know how I feel before it’s too late.”

Onjo’s eyes widened and they flickered to Suhyeok to find that he wasn’t looking at her, but at Cheong San with an expression that was really hard to describe. It was a mixture of shock, disappointment, maybe anger, and perhaps heartbreak? Maybe that’s what it was, but either way, something within her sunk because maybe she knew what that meant.

Then, Cheong San began singing with Jimin, going into this really cute choreography because they were doing it as a duet for Onjo. At first, Cheong San brought Onjo out from her seat to dance with him despite her begrudgingly doing so. To be honest, the dance and the choreography was really fun and Onjo really wanted to enjoy it, but this wasn't what she wanted. It was clear that Cheong San put so much effort into it because he also had the help of a few other students who were also in on the plan. How was she going to tell him that she still couldn’t accept his feelings?

For Cheong San, despite this performance being somewhat of a ploy to distract Onjo, he still wanted to put his heart into the song and sing to the best of his ability. Then, by the time the song was almost over, Cheong San put Onjo to the ultimate test: he took his name tag off of his vest and held it out for her. Everyone in the classroom gasped and Gyeong Su looked behind him to look at Suhyeok, who looked genuinely worried for the development that was occurring right now. Gyeong Su could see that Suhyeok was fighting the urge to confront Cheong San on what he was doing and there was also a resigned understanding behind the taller boy’s eyes that broke Gyeong Su’s heart.

This was starting to get out of hand.

“Onjo-ah, will you accept my name tag?” Cheong San asked cautiously, his heart already sinking because he already knew her answer. Truth be told, there was a part in Cheong San’s heart that wanted to do this, not because he wanted her to like him back, but because it would finally bring closure to the unrequited feelings that he’s harbored for so many years. Oddly enough, Cheong San didn’t want to get rejected, but he knew this was going to happen sooner or later.

After the music quieted down, there was a long, tense moment and even their teacher, Ms. Park didn’t dare say anything to ruin the moment.

Looking into Cheong San’s eyes, Onjo really hated to do it, but she had to be honest, even if she risked ruining their friendship, “Cheong San-ah… I’m… I’m sorry.” A gasp could be heard from somewhere in the classroom, but Onjo continued, “I think you know who I wanted to confess to and… unfortunately that hasn’t changed.” She could see the hurt in Cheong San’s eyes as he slowly lowered his hand with the name tag, letting dangle uselessly by his side.

Before Onjo could say anything else, Cheong San nodded, his jaw shifting in disappointment and he tried his best to keep it together. Even though he knew it was going to happen and he kept telling himself that this was the expected outcome, it still hurt. Even with certain expectations that are made in the attempt to curb the surprise and disappointment, those feelings still manage to seep through and it feels awful all the same.

“I… I see…” Cheong San curled his fingers around his name tag and he nodded again, trying to let the reality sink in that this wasn’t a dream. He was getting rejected in real life, exactly as he anticipated in his dreams, “I’m sorry too Onjo-ah.”

Suddenly, everything felt too small around him and Cheong San turned around without another word and he couldn’t get out of that classroom any faster. He could hear the gasps, the silent whispers of the people around him and he just had to keep repeating the mantra in his head: If anyone should get their heart broken, it’s me.

Onjo watched him leave and she instantly felt worse about what just happened, “Cheong San-ah wait!” Onjo ran after Cheong San, the bell ringing again to signal their lunch period.

Suhyeok watched both of them go, not knowing what to make of the entire situation. He didn’t think Cheong San would actually do it. Sure, he suspected that Cheong San had feelings for Onjo, or in fact, he’s known for a while now, but he couldn’t help but feel disappointed because he thought he was winning Cheong San over.

Cheong San kept walking and walking, not really sure where he was going and he could hear Onjo running to catch up with him. Strange. He didn’t think she would actually go after him. Was their friendship so weak that Cheong San couldn’t even expect that? Or was it Cheong San’s desire to wallow in dejection alone?

“Cheong San-ah! Please! Cheong San-ah, just wait!” Onjo had almost caught up to Cheong San at the main doors to the cafeteria when both of them had to stop in their tracks. There was a huge crowd of girls waiting for them, specifically for Cheong San.

Cheong San recognized all of the girls as the ones he’s sabotaged all week with Hyeon Ju leading the whole mob. Looking at all of them gathered, Cheong San could only come to the conclusion that he’s been found out. Despite all of the disguises and the really good acting (if he dares say so himself), it was only a matter of time before they would connect the dots.

Plastering on a courteous smile, Cheong San tried to defuse the situation or at least add some levity to the increasingly tense atmosphere, “Wow, I didn’t know I had so many admirers from the Mistletoe Envoy-”

“That’s not why we’re here, asshole!” Hyeon Ju snapped at Cheong San, whose courteous smile fell into a solemn line, “You’re going to pay us back for all of our failed attempts! We know that you’ve been sabotaging every single request related to Suhyeok!”

It took only a moment for Onjo to connect the dots as well and that’s exactly what Cheong San was afraid of, “Wait…” Onjo stepped forward from beside Cheong San, turning her head to look at him with the same expression as every other girl, “Cheong San-ah, don’t tell me… did you confess to me just so I wouldn’t be able to confess to Suhyeok?”

Cheong San opened his mouth, not sure what he was going to say in his defense because he totally had something prepared. Another second went by and he still couldn’t think of anything but here are his options:

1. Start with “I can explain…”

2. Deflect and keep deflecting

3. Or Lie and keep lying

Cheong San chose number two… or maybe a mixture of all the above.

“Onjo-ah, I think that’s kinda the point. Why else would I confess to you if not to stop you from confessing to Suhyeok?” Cheong San answered Onjo’s question with another question and that made the girl think about it again and it seemingly made sense before Onjo asked another one.

“No that’s not it… it would make sense if you confessed to me hoping that I would choose you over Suhyeok, but if you sabotaged all of these other girls, then there has to be another reason.” Onjo said slowly, making her way through the logic and Cheong San wondered if she would figure out the real reason and the question that she should be asking. The question that Cheong San really didn’t want to answer.

At that moment, Suhyeok and Gyeong Su came to the cafeteria, hoping to find Cheong San and Onjo, and they came upon the crowd in front of them. They came in from the side so Cheong San and company ended up not noticing them, but they were keen on observing the development because there was something Suhyeok had to confirm from Cheong San.

“Yah! You caused the accident in chemistry to stop me from confessing to Suhyeok!” One girl said and Cheong San eyed her with slight contempt.

“Ok, first of all, who confesses during chemistry class? Were you on fumes or something?” Cheong San retorted and the girl gasped and before she could get a word in, Hyeon Ju butted in to make her tragedy known as well.

“You also ruined my confession to Suhyeok! You led Gwi-Nam there on purpose, didn’t you?!” Hyeon Ju accosted Cheong San, who rolled his eyes and rounded on her because he knew exactly what to say to her.

“Oh I don’t want to hear shit out of you- You were literally there to cheat on Gwi-Nam! And whether it’s a situationship or not, do you honestly think Suhyeok would return your feelings? Cause I’m sure as hell I wouldn’t!” Cheong San countered back, his voice practically scathing with scorn and Hyeon Ju, seething and going red in the face, argued back with him, eventually involving all the other girls in their altercation.

“Even if Suhyeok doesn’t return our feelings, we at least have the right to say them! You don’t get to just-” Cheong San heard someone say and that just made him even angrier because that narrative wasn’t even true in this case. It was simply just an excuse.

“Oh my god, you’re all so full of it!” Cheong San snapped back, practically yelling over everyone and silencing the cafeteria. Everyone’s attention was now on him as if it wasn’t already before, “If you actually cared about Suhyeok or even conveying your feelings sincerely, you wouldn’t have turned to the Mistletoe Envoy because let’s be honest, the only reason why you asked for their help was because of their perfect satisfaction record.” Cheong San scanned everyone’s faces, seeing that they had shifted into guilt because he was right. He knew he was right, “I’ve worked for them and I’ve seen the requests of other earnest people in this school who’ve made you their Christmas wish, but they’re afraid of getting their hearts broken because you all made a request for Suhyeok the moment he showed up to the confessional!”

“And what about you Cheong San-ah? You’re afraid of getting your heart broken… but it’s not by me, is it?” Onjo asked slowly, thinking that she’s figured it out now. Cheong San confessed to her knowing that he’d get rejected, and perhaps he pushed through his fear, but there’s someone else that he’s even more afraid of, “Cheong San-ah… by any chance, did you make Suhyeok your Christmas wish?”

By the way Cheong San’s eyes widened ever so slightly, Onjo knew that she at least got something right or maybe she hit the nail on the head, “That’s it, isn’t it?” For some reason, Onjo decided to look around and that’s when she saw Suhyeok off to the side with Gyeong Su.

Cheong San opened his mouth, trying to come up with something to say and when he noticed Onjo’s gaze shift, he followed it to Suhyeok, who was staring right at him, his expression unreadable. His heart dropped straight into his stomach right then and everything within him was strung so tight that he feared that he might actually snap.

Gyeong Su bit his lip, looking between his two best friends with his nerves on the verge of being fried. He wondered what were the chances of any of this ending well, but Cheong San was about to be publicly outed with no way out, so the chances were very low.

Not being able to take it anymore, Cheong San let those strings twist themselves one more time and he just snapped, “Ok! So what if I did?!” Everyone gasped dramatically and Onjo’s eyes widened considerably, an expression akin to pity, but Cheong San really didn’t want to see that look of hers, “But I’m not his keeper! He’s allowed to want anyone and yet it feels so unfair because I want to be the person who makes him the happiest! But I’m terrified as to what that actually means!”

“All I’m hearing is that you sabotaged all of us because you like him!” Hyeon Ju grabbed a fistful of kimchi from her lunch tray and threw it at Cheong San, who was taken by surprise as the wet fermented cabbage hit him right by his chin before splattering onto his collar. Suhyeok clenched his teeth angrily and he started forward, intent on helping Cheong San, but before he could, something else shocking happened.

Onjo gasped at the sight before turning on Hyeon Ju and immediately grabbing whatever was on someone’s plate, which was rice, and throwing it at her, “What the hell do you think this is?! Some kind of K-drama?!” Hyeon Ju shrieked as the rice grains stuck to her hair and clothes and she glared at Onjo in fuming anger before the whole thing just erupted. What made it even worse was that Daesu decided to contribute to the chaos and drama by singing “Please Don’t…” by K.Will in the background.

Recovering from the sudden kimchi attack, Cheong San looked quickly between the two girls before trying to intervene, “Wait wait wait! Guys! Let’s not-”

“YAH! YOU BITCH! STAY AWAY FROM SUHYEOK!” Hyeon Ju screamed at Onjo before taking another handful of something and throwing it at Onjo, who dodged and it hit someone else and from there, it was kind of a chain reaction.

Cheong San immediately stepped between Onjo and some other girl who also started getting ammunition and he blocked a wad of tofu from hitting her, “YAH! GUYS! STOP! THIS IS GETTING OUT OF CONTROL!”

In no time at all, it turned into an all-out food war and all the girls started turning on each other since they were all technically rivals for Suhyeok’s affections. Cheong San was mainly on the defensive, trying his best to block the food attacks for Onjo, but it was starting to get overwhelming. He got pelted with kimchi, rice, jjajangmyeon, gamja salad, freshly boiled bean sprouts, bulgogi, and all the sides you could think of. The girls were even starting to get physical by grabbing each other’s hair and swiveling down the lunch table aisles. Those who were spectating the fight recorded it with their phones that they managed to sneak out of class. Cheong San mainly tried to break people up despite being face-checked by food all the same, but he really didn’t want to snap at anyone.

At one point, Cheong San ended up encountering Gwi-Nam by getting sucker-punched in the face, “OWWW!! What the hell was that for?! I didn’t even hit you!” Cheong San held his cheek and he looked back at the delinquent who somehow managed to join the fight.

“That was for what you did the other day!” Gwi-Nam spat back and Cheong San resisted the strong urge to roll his eyes to tomorrow.

“Dude, your girl was literally trying to- No! She was literally cheating on you! Are you daft or are you actually that dumb?!” Cheong San shouted over the cacophony of fighting and Gwi-Nam argued back as if there was actually something to gain from this conversation.

“I’d rather take out my anger on you than on her! I dare you to run your mouth again and see what happens!” Gwi-Nam argued, practically shouting back over the other yells and Cheong San deadpanned back at him.

“Awwww, you went from domestic violence to just violence. Bravo! Let me give you a medal!” Cheong San said with sarcasm dripping from every word and he just didn’t really care for self-control anymore, “And since it’s the season of giving, let me give you something else.”

“What?” Gwi-Nam asked, the question sounding almost dumb and Cheong San replied promptly.

“THESE HANDS!” Cheong San shouted before lunging at Gwi-Nam, both of his hands grabbing tightly onto the other’s hair. Gwi-Nam yelled out in surprise and pain from Cheong San’s iron grip and the latter threw his head down onto the table. The two of them grappled on the lunch table before Gwi-Nam was surprisingly overpowered by Cheong San, who lifted and slammed Gwi-Nam’s face into a lunch tray repeatedly, trying to shove his face into the kimchi.

“GET THE FUCK OFF ME!” Gwi-Nam managed to say between slams, but Cheong San’s adrenaline was working overtime and he didn’t give two fucks about anything he had to say.

“DON’T! FUCKING! MESS WITH ME! EAT! KIMCHI GWI-NAM! EAT IT!!!” Cheong San slammed Gwi-Nam’s head down onto the lunch tray with every punctuation of his battle cry. The boy beneath him, beat up as he was, managed to gain enough of a foothold to elbow Cheong San in the stomach before grabbing his arm and also throwing him onto the table, “AUGH-”

“You motherfucker, you wanna play it like that?! It’s your funeral!” Gwi-Nam got up, still having a hold of Cheong San’s arm, but before he could do anything, Cheong San kicked him in the stomach, “OOUGH-” Keeping his foot planted against Gwi-Nam’s midriff, Cheong San then grabbed his wrist with his free arm and pulled hard, rotating his body to flip him over the table, “GWAUGHH-”

With the aid of Daesu’s melodic singing during the climax, Gwi-Nam landed straight on his back with a ceremonious crash, falling right into four or five food trays, splattering food everywhere, and that was that. Some people saw what Cheong San did and they gasped in shock, momentarily distracted from their own fighting to just stand there in awe. Gwi-Nam groaned in pain, but he didn’t make any move to get up. Lifting his head up with various sauces dripping from his hair, Cheong San huffed once with exhaustion before getting off the table.

“Don’t mess with the mascot of Cheong San’s Chicken. Everything in there might be chicken… but I’m not… you son of a bitch.” Cheong San braced himself on his thighs, finally taking a breather and then he heard a clamor of voices and he looked up to see the teachers and cafeteria staff starting to intervene and break everyone up.

“WHY ARE ALL OF YOU FIGHTING WITH FOOD?! WHAT DO YOU THINK THIS IS?! KINDERGARTEN?!”

Cheong San paled at the booming yell and before he could say something or make a move, a gentle hand wrapped around his wrist and he looked up to find Suhyeok helping him up, “Hyeokie-”

“Let’s get out of here before they hold you responsible.” Suhyeok murmured into his ear, his expression nothing but warm and friendly and Cheong San barely nodded before the two of them quickly slipped out of the cafeteria amidst the chaos.

After Suhyeok got them to a safe and empty place, which happened to be near the P.E. lockers, the two of them finally got to confront each other for everything that happened in the past few days. The two of them stood silently for a moment and when Cheong San looked up at Suhyeok again, he still looked warm and non-judgemental.

Cheong San noticed that Suhyeok still looked completely clean and he decided to break the silence with some levity, as usual, “Yah, how did you emerge from that completely unscathed?!”

“That’s a trade secret.” Suhyeok replied amusedly, giving the other boy a cheeky wink and Cheong San deadpanned at him, not really in the mood for his antics.

“What trade secret? Did you somehow manage to dodge everything?” Cheong San asked and Suhyeok held his index finger up to stop him from talking.

“Ah Ah Ah! It’s my turn to ask the questions. It’s you who has to explain himself.” Suhyeok countered, observing Cheong San to see if he was willing to agree to his request. Cheong San didn’t seem skittish, so he wasn’t going to make a run for it. He’s been avoiding him all week because of this Mistletoe Envoy business and Suhyeok sighed before making a little confession of his own, “I missed you, you know? I feel like we haven’t gotten much time to hang out or talk and I find myself missing it a bit.”

Hearing the vulnerability in Suhyeok’s voice, Cheong San instantly felt worse about everything and never had he wanted to make amends so badly, “Hyeokie, I-I’m sorry. About this. About everything. I just got so caught up in my anxiety and it got so out of hand that I… I’m just so sorry, Hyeokie.”

There was a pause of silence between them before Suhyeok brought up the elephant in the room, “You know, I heard what you said to those girls.” Cheong San tensed at that sentence and Suhyeok kept going after a beat, “Is it true? Did you make me your Christmas wish?”

Cheong San opened his mouth to say something in response, but all that came out was a sigh. He wasn’t going to deflect or try to change the subject, but he definitely wasn’t prepared to say the truth. However, he knew that he owed it to Suhyeok.

“I- Fuck- I didn’t want it to come out this way, or at least not like this.” Cheong San winced, realizing that he was still covered with various food splatters and he didn’t even have the chance to wipe his face, but honestly, it was now or never, “I can explain what happened in class with Onjo.” Cheong San started and he glanced up at Suhyeok to see that he was patiently waiting for him to continue. He saw Suhyeok’s reaction earlier to the whole musical confession and he felt just awful for bringing it up, “Thanks to the Mistletoe Envoy’s help, I knew she was going to confess to you in class and get rejected. I couldn’t let that happen, so I decided to ‘confess’ to her to spare her the humiliation.”

“But that’s not the only reason why you did it.” Suhyeok followed up, coming to that conclusion from what Onjo managed to piece together from the confrontation in the cafeteria. However, Suhyeok’s eyebrows furrowed a bit because Cheong San’s first priority was still to protect Onjo even now, but he knew there was a more selfish reason behind it.

“I mean, I confessed to her knowing I would get rejected because I didn’t want to regret anything, but I… I wanted to protect myself from an even bigger heartbreak.” Cheong San admitted and he cringed internally because he was still beating around the bush concerning the real reason why he went so far. He could get himself through this. He already weathered blow after blow from everyone else, so he could take this and be done with it, “Hyeokie, do you remember when you first told me that you were going to make a request with the Mistletoe Envoy?”

“Yeah, I remember. You told Onjo it was a scam and you ended up being one of their little helpers anyway.” Suhyeok answered playfully, teasing Cheong San a little bit because he noticed that the other boy was getting more nervous as he was getting towards the end of what he wanted to say.

“Yah, I’m not that much shorter than you, but that’s not the point!” Cheong San cut himself off before he could go off on a tangent and he tried to set things straight again, bringing his hands up in an erratic gesture, “Stop teasing me, otherwise I’m gonna remember that I’m confessing to you while covered in all the food groups and it’s embarrassing enough!”

“You were gonna confess to me?” Suhyeok asked softly, his voice sounding so hopeful and Cheong San scrunched his eyes closed, realizing that he slipped up again, and he really couldn’t handle just how hopeful Suhyeok sounded.

“I just wasn’t prepared to feel so strongly about you having a request for someone and I know that you didn’t want to tell me who it was, but…” Cheong San stopped himself and took a breather while Suhyeok patiently waited for him. Honestly, anyone else would have been so annoyed with him by now, but Suhyeok rarely ever gets angry with him and Cheong San always wondered how was that even possible? Taking a deep breath, Cheong San slowly asked the question that could make or break him:

“Would it be ok if I could hope that it’s me? Because I really want to hope that it’s me.”

Suhyeok fought a grin from coming onto his face for only a split second before letting himself beam in full force. Honestly, Suhyeok didn’t understand how Cheong San could not even consider himself, but he should have expected it from him. He’s the type of person who would sacrifice his own happiness for what he thinks would make the other person happy. It would take a lot for Cheong San to even think about himself, Suhyeok knew that well.

Was this actually happening right now? When Cheong San saw that Suhyeok smiled so wide that he could see the creases from how high it was, he wondered for a split second if this was a dream.

Taking the smallest step forward, Suhyeok nodded and looked down into Cheong San’s uncharacteristically meek and shy eyes, “Of course it’s ok for you to have hope. You’re allowed to want. You’re allowed to be selfish with yourself and if I’m being honest,” Suhyeok leaned down slightly so he was eye-level with Cheong San and spoke a little more quietly as if he were confessing a secret, “I’ve been kinda hoping that you’d say something all week.”

Cheong San blinked once, a little startled by how close Suhyeok was, “You were?”

Nodding once, Suhyeok reaffirmed Cheong San’s wish by making it come true, “Mmhm, so you definitely have a chance, because even when you’re covered in all the food groups,” Suhyeok reached forward to pick off a few grains of rice in Cheong San’s hair, his touch gentle and light that the other almost couldn’t feel it, “you’re still absolutely adorable.”

Flushing crimson, Cheong San sputtered to ask his next question, the thought coming into his mind faster than he could process because he realized what Suhyeok just implied and now he just had to know, “So wait, Hyeokie, am I your Christmas wish?”

“Mmhm, it’s you, you dummy!” Suhyeok reached up to poke Cheong San in the forehead with two fingers and the smaller boy yelped slightly in surprise before looking up at him like a lost puppy who just found his forever home.

“Wait, seriously? I’m your Christmas wish?” Cheong San asked one more time and Suhyeok nodded, still beaming back at him.

“Yeah, you are, and I would totally kiss you to prove it,” Suhyeok said so casually that Cheong San was almost knocked breathless, his face practically being set aflame, “but you’re still covered in food, so let’s get you cleaned up.”

Realizing that he was still indeed covered in food, Cheong San cursed under his breath, causing Suhyeok to laugh while guiding him to the gym locker rooms. It was currently empty so Cheong San didn’t have to worry about anyone walking in on him, so Suhyeok got him his PE uniform and Cheong San took a shower there, getting (mostly) rid of all the grime and food. Changing into his new clothes, Cheong San sighed and he looked outside the shower rooms, knowing that Suhyeok was right outside waiting for him.

Drying his hair with a towel, Cheong San couldn’t help but smile to himself, repeating Suhyeok’s words softly to himself, “It is me…” and as soon as those words left his mouth, Cheong San’s smile grew just a little wider.

Walking out of the shower rooms with his dirty clothes in a bag, Cheong San was met with Suhyeok holding out his blazer for him. Looking from the blazer to the taller boy, Cheong San was about to ask what was this for when he answered him, “It’s cold outside so you’re gonna need it, otherwise you might get sick.”

Nodding a little dumbly, Cheong San gingerly took the blazer and put it on, feeling the shoulders and sleeves sag just slightly over his frame. Cheong San knew that Suhyeok was bigger than him, but at least it wasn’t too long.

“Thanks.” Cheong San said a little awkwardly, but the warm smile he got in response just melted his inhibitions. Actually, maybe a little too much because what Cheong San said/did next was honestly beyond him, “Now that I’m clean, where is that kiss you promised me?”

He had to resist biting on his tongue because what the fuck is with his brazeness?

Suhyeok’s eyes lit up with delight and he stepped close to Cheong San with only a few inches between them. Slipping his hand in Cheong San’s and pulling him ever slightly closer, Suhyeok leaned down and told Cheong San, “As much as I’d like to, I do agree with what you said earlier. This isn’t really how I imagined things unfolding and I want to do this properly.”

Pouting slightly, Cheong San wanted to protest but he did understand. He’s in gym clothes and he still hasn’t seen what Suhyeok asked for in his request to the Mistletoe Envoy. There’s also the fact that most of this chaos… if not all of this chaos was his fault.

“Yeah I get it, but could I at least get a hug?” Cheong San asked, opening his arms out wide and pulling out the freaking aegyo. That was it. Suhyeok just melted and nothing could make him come back from just how head over heels he was for this boy. Those warm eyes and that little smile that almost looked like a smirk as if he knew that Suhyeok could never resist the chance to hug him. It was their thing. Whether it ended in a tickle fight or a sleepover after having a movie night, Suhyeok loved hugging Cheong San and being hugged by Cheong San.

“The day I refuse one of your hugs is the day I want you to kill me.” Suhyeok said resolutely with no hesitation and Cheong San let out a guffaw of laughter before he threw himself into his arms. Wrapping his arms securely around Cheong San, Suhyeok snuggled into his hair, letting out rumbles of laughter of his own and they stayed like that for a long while, just enjoying each other’s company.

For the cafeteria food fight incident, Cheong San did end up not being held responsible even though Onjo, Suhyeok, and Gyeong Su vouched for him. He was surprised that Gwi-Nam didn’t turn him in since he absolutely mopped the floor with him. Maybe it was a matter of pride, because imagine that, getting knocked on your ass by a fellow student and having to get an adult to settle it. Yeah, it was definitely a matter of pride, but speaking of mopping the floor, Cheong San did volunteer to help clean up the whole mess because he felt semi-responsible for what happened. Also! Cheong San also made up with Onjo as he wanted to thank her for standing up for him. Honestly, he thought she was gonna be mad at him for sabotaging her and everyone else, but that didn’t happen fortunately. If anything, she was more mad that he didn’t realize it sooner and tell her. Apparently, it was incredibly obvious, starting from their Secret Santa event last year when Cheong San went through the trouble to get Suhyeok an autographed baseball from his favorite batter.

After all that was settled and school was let out for the holiday break, that was when Suhyeok could finally show Cheong San what he worked so hard on. Something to show Cheong San that he was indeed the best thing that ever happened to him.

“Are we almost there yet?” Cheong San asked, his eyes covered by Suhyeok’s hands as the latter led him towards the surprise. They were walking along the street, or maybe waddling was more like it because Suhyeok had Cheong San swaddled up in his big coat because it was cold.

“Almost… just a little farther…” Suhyeok said in his ear, guiding Cheong San and waddling along with him and the boy in front of him laughed at the cute sounds he was making while they were on their way. They must have looked so ridiculous but they didn’t really care. After a little while longer, Suhyeok stopped them and Cheong San let out a little sneeze that he had been trying to keep back. Letting go of one of Cheong San’s eyes, Suhyeok opened the door and proceeded to lead them inside, putting his hand back over Cheong San’s eye.

Cheong San took a whiff of the air and it smelled homey and warm like japchae and honey butter biscuits. It barely took a second and he knew exactly where he was and he asked out loud, “Yah, Hyeokie, did you lead me back to my mom’s chicken place? Aren’t we closed for today?”

“Yeah I did, but the surprise I got for you is here.” Suhyeok replied and he let go of Cheong San’s eyes, letting him see what he had prepared for himself. Cheong San opened his eyes and he looked around for a moment, seeing that the restaurant still looked pretty normal with the usual Christmas decorations and whatnot. However, when Cheong San looked left, that’s where he saw it.

On the wall was a collection of photos, numerous photos of Cheong San and Suhyeok and they were all arranged into a giant snowflake. His mouth opening in awe, Cheong San stepped closer and he saw that some of them weren’t even photos, but screens showing videos of them from different moments and memories in the past year and a half. Some of them were projected onto the wall and when Cheong San got close enough, he could recall where each and every video and photo came from.

“This is Sannie’s very first shift at the new restaurant named after him! Let’s see how he’s doing!”

“Yah, Bare-su, why are you recording? Come on, I got a whole line waiting behind you!”

“I just wanted to capture you in the chicken hat, it looks hilarious on you!”

“Hyeokie! Are you ready for your very first roller coaster ride?!”

“Sannie, you’re gonna drop your phone, please please stop recording.”

“I just didn’t think you’d be so terrified of roller coasters! I’m telling you, just ride on a couple and that fear will be gone in no time!”

“Hey, Sannie! Look at the camera!”

“Hmm? Hey! It’s such a beautiful day, isn’t it? Look at the views!”

“San-ah! Are you happy that we got to go to Jeju island together?!”

“Of course I am! And it’s extra special because it’s your first time! Come on, we gotta catch up with the others!”

“Hey! Wait up!”

His eyes feeling dewey from all the emotions hitting him, Cheong San looked up on the outer branches to see his other friends like Gyeong Su, Onjo, Daesu, Woo Jin, Joon Yeong, and everyone else, but as he followed the paths down towards the center, it was just him and Suhyeok. It was all so overwhelming and Cheong San took a deep breath as he gazed on the whole snowflake-shaped collage, just enraptured by all the memories with Suhyeok.

“So? Sannie? Do you like it?” Suhyeok stepped up beside him and looked at the collage with him.

“Mmhm…” Cheong San nodded minutely, sniffling from seeing all of their pictures together. They really have been through so much together. In the whole context of time, it somehow feels like it’s been an eternity yet they still have the rest of their lives. It was a strange feeling, but it was just so nostalgic and comforting, “You know, when I told myself that I wanted to be the only person who could make you smile like that,” Cheong San looked at one particular photo where he and Suhyeok went to see their favorite soccer team at the Sports Complex Stadium in their town. Both of them were smiling so wide as they cheered for their team and Cheong San had just told him a funny joke. It really must have been telling when Cheong San could recall everything leading up to each photo being taken, “it’s not really something that someone who’s just your best friend would say.”

Suhyeok was silent, but Cheong San could tell he was listening. Turning right to look at him, Cheong San built up the courage to finally say what he had been meaning to say since the beginning, “Suhyeok, this is the reason. I love this and I love you so much for being the reason.”

Suhyeok’s breath hitched when he heard Cheong San use the L-word before him and when he saw him start to cry, he immediately moved to comfort him. Cupping Cheong San’s face, Suhyeok looked between his teary eyes and he wiped the tears on his cheek with his thumb, “Hey hey hey, why are you crying? I don’t think these are tears of joy, so…” Suhyeok didn’t know what to say because he was so caught off guard by Cheong San’s confession.

“I’m sorry, it’s just… I can’t help but think that there’s another life out there where you aren’t the reason.” Cheong San said quietly through his tears and Suhyeok’s eyes widened as he took that in. Suhyeok could tell that it was an extremely heavy yet vague feeling, however, he could fathom how Cheong San felt, “A life where we don’t get to make these memories, a life where we aren’t as close as we are now, or even a life where we’ve never met, but I’m just so grateful that it’s you, Hyeokie.”

Suhyeok took one shaky breath and he couldn’t help but be overwhelmed to tears as well. A life where they never got to say what they wanted to say to each other or a life where they never met. Both possibilities, to Suhyeok, sounded so horrible and tragic and he didn’t want to imagine a life where he would have to let Cheong San go. Drawing Cheong San in closer, Suhyeok leaned down to press his lips firmly against his forehead before he cradled the smaller boy’s head against his chest.

“Cheong San-ah.” Suhyeok started, blinking the tears out of his eyes and he prayed that he could bring peace to Cheong San’s heart as he hugged him tight, “I know that there’s an infinity of space, time, and the endless possibilities… and while it may seem futile in an existential sense, think about the fact that we’re both here together. In all of those possibilities you spoke of, we managed to both be here together right here, right now. That’s the nature of destiny: it creates a miracle but convinces us of an accident.”

He could still hear Cheong San sniffling in his arms but he seemed to be calmer than before. Suhyeok rubbed soothing circles into Cheong San’s back, reveling in his warmth and how perfectly he fit in his arms. That’s no accident.

“Our choices were no accident. Us falling in love with each other was definitely not just a miracle. I’m grateful that it’s you too.” Suhyeok murmured into Cheong San’s hair with so much love and care, meaning it with all of his heart. Tilting his head back so he could look at Cheong San again, the boy seemed to notice something above them and Suhyeok followed his gaze to see a mistletoe right above them.

The Mistletoe Envoy put it right there and if Suhyeok was being honest, he kinda forgot it was there.

Seemingly not able to wait anymore, Cheong San tilted up to press his lips against Suhyeok’s before he could say anything. Feeling Cheong San’s arm wrap around his neck and drawing him closer, Suhyeok smiled against Cheong San’s lips and kissed him back, their lips moving slowly together as if they were trying to savor this very moment for as long as possible. Suhyeok felt tingles just from their noses brushing against each other and he sighed into the kiss, relishing in the magic of their first kiss. The sensations were one of a kind and the fire that it stoked in both of their hearts would last for a long time.

“Merry Christmas, Hyeokie.”

“Merry Christmas, Sannie.”

Suhyeok. Thank you for reminding me that it isn’t futile. This is proof that there is a time and place for us. I remember… agonizing over the pain of not being able to know what it’s like to be happy with you. Now… it’s different. You know, I’d like to believe that we’ve gotten together thousands of times in a thousand different ways and no matter how similar they may be, I know I must have cherished every single one of them. It’s no longer just a matter of believing… but knowing that the possibility of us is real. Thank you… for finding me…

To me… you’re the reason why no one snowflake is like the other. 

A curious thing to note while we're talking about the grand scheme of destiny is that if Cheong San or Suhyeok had looked at the photo collage a little more closely, they would have seen a polaroid of them that neither of them could seem to remember taking; a snowflake from a first snow long forgotten that drifted through the infinite expanse of the night to encounter a nostalgic warmth like no other. It's fleeting, but precious...and by the next time they notice that polaroid, it would already be blank because that snowflake has already melted away.