Chapter Text
“So let me get this straight,” K begins with a frown. “You think your boyfriend doesn’t love you anymore because he hasn’t slept with you since he got back?”
Sunghoon huffs, crossing his arms and sinking back into the pillows on his bed. They were in his apartment today, alone aside from Jake who was currently running lunch to Jungwon who had a day full of meetings that he couldn’t escape from. Heeseung was supposed to be here too, but he had been called to the company early this morning as moral support for Niki who was going to be fighting to keep his relationship with his boyfriend. This meant that Sunghoon was given the perfect opportunity to consult K for dating advice without worrying about the others overhearing.
They had started this conversation in the kitchen, but Sunghoon had needed the moral support of his plush penguin to admit to his worries. It was a treasured possession, one that Heeseung had gotten him on one of their staged dates that ended up actually being fun for both of them.
“It’s a valid conclusion to come to.” He argues.
K sighs, looking up to the ceiling like he is regretting all of his decisions in life.
“It has been a total of a week. Don’t you think you’re being a little dramatic here?”
Sunghoon groans. If even K doesn’t understand where he was coming from then there was no hope in anyone else getting it either.
“But before he couldn’t keep his hands off me. If he isn’t losing interest, then what other reason is there?”
K reaches out and grasps both his hands in his own, staring into his eyes seriously.
“Sunghoon, I’m saying this as your best friend who loves and cares about you,” He states, only waiting until Sunghoon nods slowly before continuing. “You’re a dumbass.”
Sunghoon pulls his hands away, swatting at K’s arm.
“Asshole.” He grumbles, crossing his arms and squishing his penguin into an unrecognizable blob.
“Don’t pout, I mean well.” K laughs.
He wasn’t pouting. He’s cool and collected so he never does something as childish and petty as pouting.
Sunghoon rolls his eyes. “So why do you think he won’t touch me then?”
K gives him a look like he’s particularly dense.
“He’s taking his time because he knows you startle easily.” He explains, almost like he’s talking to a toddler which is minorly insulting, but he’s willing to overlook it if it means getting an answer to his question. “Your relationship started with sex the first time and look where that got you. Heeseung is trying to make sure you don’t make the same mistakes again because he loves you and wants to be with you for a very long time.”
Sunghoon narrows his eyes. “You’re sure?”
“Of course not. He’s your boyfriend not mine.” K scoffs. “But he could also be worried about you because you look like you could blow away in a light breeze. Maybe he’s just afraid of hurting you. Whatever the reason, it’s definitely not because he doesn’t love you anymore so put that out of your mind.”
He lets himself relax, knowing K was most likely right. It wasn’t like he thought Heeseung could fall out of love that easily, but fear and insecurity were deeply ingrained into Sunghoon’s very being.
“Why the sudden doubts?” He questions. “You seemed fine the other night.”
Sunghoon avoids his eyes, knowing he couldn’t hide anything from him but wanting to try anyway.
“No reason.” He says carefully. “I just haven’t been sleeping well lately. That’s all.”
K doesn’t seem impressed.
“Did you just try to lie to me?” K frowns, worrying his lip between his teeth before seeming to come to a conclusion, his eyes shooting back up to meet Sunghoon’s own. He knows better than anyone that there’s only one thing Sunghoon would lie to him about.
“When did she call?”
Sunghoon shrinks into himself, knowing he’s been caught but still not wanting to admit to it.
“Please.” He begs, hoping he’ll just drop it for once. “I don’t want to do this right now.”
“Hoonie,” K says softly, gripping his hand once more. “Talk to me. It’s just the two of us here.”
Damn him and his insufferable kindness.
“My mom called this morning after Heeseung left.” He admits. “I think she has someone watching my house because the call was almost immediately after I walked Heeseung to his car.”
“Shit.” K rubs at his forehead, seemingly trying to decide what to do with this new information. “I’m getting Jungwon to hire you full time security.”
Sunghoon doesn’t argue with that, mainly because he knew it would be happening whether he agreed or not.
“She told me that Yeji thought I was disgusting.” He continues quietly, squeezing his penguin tighter. He tries to hold onto the memory of when Heeseung had given it to him, the fond smile and bright eyes as he pressed it into his hands. It helps, if only a little.
“I don’t want to believe her, but I haven’t seen Yeji in so long that she might hate me by now and I have no idea. Maybe my mother was telling the truth, and she really does find my relationship repulsive.”
“Your sister loves you Hoonie.” K says adamantly. “I’m sure your mother only said it because she knows it will hurt you even if it is a lie.”
“Well, she was right.” He chuckles, although nothing about this situation was funny. “Even after all these years she still knows exactly what to say to make me wonder if I ever really escaped from her in the first place. Will there ever be a day when I can stop caring about her?”
“I don’t have all the answers, but you know I understand you more than anyone.”
K’s own family was a topic that was practically banned from any and all conversation. Sunghoon knows he had left his abusive home as a teenager and that his parents disapproved of his dream of being a runner, but even he didn’t know much about the people that had raised K. All he knows is that they haven’t spoken to or even reached out to K since he left home and neither party seems in any hurry to change that. But even now, K strives to please them, working himself to death in the hopes that one day they would admit they were wrong and say they were proud of him. He and Sunghoon were so eerily similar in that regard that it was no surprise their friendship blossomed so quickly.
“I know.” Sunghoon says softly. “Thanks for listening.”
K smiles and lies down beside him, patting the pillow invitingly.
“Let’s take a nap and forget all our troubles for a while.”
“You have troubles?” He can’t help but ask.
K makes a soft sound of acknowledgement.
“There’s this kid on Jo’s basketball team that I think has a crush on him. Jo said I was being ridiculous if I thought he would ever like someone more than he likes me, but I can’t help but worry. He’s his age and can give him the time and attention I can’t. I wouldn’t blame Jo for choosing someone like that over me.”
“Now who’s being a dumbass?” He fires back. “Jo truly loves you and anyone can see that he thinks the world of you. I don’t think he’ll give that up so easily.”
Sunghoon follows his lead, lying down and letting his exhaustion wash over him. They really were pathetic excuses for adults, getting jealous and anxious over the smallest things like a bunch of children.
“K?”
He gets a muffled hum in response.
“I’ll always have you, right?” He forces out. “Even if we argue or have lovers, you’ll still make the time for me, won’t you?”
“What kind of question is that?” K scoffs. “You could destroy my whole life, and I’d still stand beside you and pass the dynamite. You won’t lose me, just like you won’t lose Jake or Jungwon either. The four of us will be together until we die.”
Sunghoon burrows down into his pillow, hoping the dreams that come are kind to him.
“Thank you. For everything.”
K turns over and reaches out to hold his hand lying between them.
“You never have to thank me for anything.”
“I’m still going to.” Sunghoon mutters.
K let’s go of his hand to reach up and ruffle his hair.
“I know you will. You’re stubborn like that.”
Sunghoon falls asleep easily, knowing his best friends would be with him no matter what.
“Do you think Sunghoon will be mad if I shove K off the bed?” A voice that sounds a lot like Heeseung wonders.
There’s a soft snort.
“I think K would kill you himself before Sunghoon ever got the chance.”
Sunghoon peels his eyes open, finding Jake and Heeseung standing beside the bed with twin looks of contemplation.
“Hee, you’re back.” He says, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.
He goes to sit up, only to find himself trapped beneath the behemoth body of K spread half on top of him. Sunghoon scowls, shoving at the offending limbs until K stirs from his sleep looking thoroughly confused.
“You’re crushing me.” Sunghoon grumbles.
K huffs, rolling off of him and staring up at the ceiling, seeming only half awake.
“I was gone for less than two hours and you two decided to nap without me.” Jake whines, shoving his way between them on the bed.
“He’s on my pillow.” Heeseung states, glaring at K’s form.
K glances over and waves a dismissive hand.
“We’re having relationship problems, so we’re allowed to do what we want.”
Heeseung whips his head around to stare at Sunghoon in panic.
“We’re having problems?” He asks worriedly, gripping onto his hand. “Why didn’t you say something if you weren’t happy?”
Sunghoon shakes his head. “It’s nothing. I was just being a little dramatic.”
He can see K glancing over at him disapprovingly, but he decides to ignore that.
“That doesn’t matter to me.” He fires back. “I don’t care how dramatic you’re being, I want you to tell me if there’s a problem between us.”
“I got worked up over nothing.” Sunghoon reassures. “It was just something someone said to me that made me a little self-conscious. Don’t worry about it, please.”
Heeseung doesn’t seem reassured, but he does let it go for now, which is pretty much all Sunghoon could hope for. He would find the time to tell Heeseung later, when his friends weren’t present and able to see the pity that Heeseung would no doubt aim his way.
“What about K?” Jake asks curiously. “Trouble in paradise already?”
K shakes his head. “We’re fine.”
Jake looks from K to Sunghoon with a frown.
“The two of you are the most unrepentant liars I have ever met.”
“At least we’re honest about our lying.” K smiles.
Jake smacks him none too gently.
“Or you could just not lie?” He suggests. “Just a thought.”
“It’s private business.” Sunghoon mutters, patting the small space beside him until Heeseung gets the message and slides into the gap. He wraps around him like an octopus, arms and legs tangling together until you could barely tell whose body was whose.
“Since when do we have secrets?” Jake asks with a gasp. “I feel like you haven’t told me anything lately.”
“Jungwon gets to know my work and health problems, K gets family problems and relationship struggles, and you get everything else.”
“Everything else sounds vague.” He says, eyes narrowed.
Sunghoon waves him off. “Like if someone pisses me off then you’ll be the first to know. Or if I find some dirt on someone then I’d call you.”
“So I’m the important one that you use in your day-to-day life.” Jake says with wonder.
Sunghoon nearly smiles at how easy to please he is. A puppy at heart as always.
“Right. So they have to deal with the big problems because I need you as my moral support while they give me their advice.”
Jake claps decisively, making Sunghoon jump and Heeseung nearly fall out of the bed.
“I feel much more important now, thank you.”
“Somehow I feel less important after hearing that.” K teases.
“Good.” Heeseung grumbles. Sunghoon jabs him in the ribs for that one.
“Be nice.” He remands.
K sits up far enough that he can look down on Heeseung.
“Yeah, Heeseung, be nice.”
“Don’t make me hit you.”
K rolls his eyes. “I’d love to see you try.”
Sunghoon’s phone begins incessantly beeping before the argument can go any further. He reaches over Heeseung and snags it, barely glancing at the screen before silencing the alarm.
“What was that?” Heeseung asks curiously.
Sunghoon sighs, wishing he could just bury himself in his blankets and never come out.
“Training time.” K groans, pushing up from the bed. “Sunghoon has to be at the rink in an hour and I have to hit the gym.”
Jake whines, thrashing around in the blankets.
“I just got back; it can’t be time for practice already.”
K looks down at his watch as he grabs his things. “I give it five minutes before Jungwon starts texting for location updates.”
Sunghoon forces himself into a sitting position, lifting his phone just as it trills with a text message. He holds his phone up for K to see Jungwon’s message with a bemused smile.
“Too bad we weren’t betting.” Sunghoon laughs. “It didn’t even take five seconds, much less five minutes.”
“I forgot he was talking to you.” K concedes. “It only takes me ten minutes to get ready whereas our resident prince has to have no less than thirty just for his nails and another thirty to actually get ready.”
“It isn’t my fault I’m prettier than you.” Sunghoon sniffs.
“Now that’s just rude.” K scoffs, tossing Sunghoon’s gloves right at his face. “Now get up before Jungwon starts blowing up my phone asking where you are.”
Heeseung frowns. “Why would he ask you?”
K’s smile is smug and antagonistic.
“Because Sunghoon and I have separation anxiety. Where he goes, I go.”
Heeseung glares at him in full force. “You’re insufferable.”
“I don’t want to hear that from you.”
Sunghoon holds up his hands before they can devolve into a full-blown argument.
“Heeseung darling, could you go and find where Jungwon hid my skates?”
Heeseung beams under the attention, completely ignoring K’s existence and leaning forward to press a kiss to his cheek.
“Leave it to me, baby.”
K and Jake both shake their heads, seeming almost pitying as Heeseung leaves the room.
“Manipulated his way right out of that one.”
“It’s not manipulation if it’s the truth.” Sunghoon points out as he stands and heads for the bathroom.
He’s pretty sure he hears Jake mutter something about being a bad boyfriend, but he’s sure that isn’t directed at him.
Sunghoon is surprised to hear the sounds of laughter and multiple voices in his apartment when he finally makes it home that night. He knew Heeseung was probably here, but his friends were most likely in their own homes for the night since Jungwon had dropped him off instead of following him up like he usually would.
He slips his shoes off before warily moving towards the living room.
Heeseung is on the couch as expected, but across from him is Niki and a guy that Sunghoon hasn’t seen in a long time.
“Hoon,” Heeseung says, smiling brightly when he catches sight of him. “You’re back early.”
He hums, crossing to sit beside him on the couch. “Most people wouldn’t call eleven o’clock early.”
“Considering you got here at one yesterday I call this an improvement.” Heeseung teases before turning back to his friends. “Sorry I didn’t tell you earlier, but Niki and his boyfriend came to visit.”
Sunghoon arches a brow and turns on Sunoo.
“Boyfriend, huh?”
Sunoo blushes even though he’s trying his hardest to glare at him.
“I don’t want to hear anything from you.” Sunoo scoffs. “Your relationship was announced by dispatch.”
Heeseung looks between Sunoo and Sunghoon curiously.
“You two know each other?”
Sunghoon nods. “Sunoo and Jungwon went to middle school together.”
Niki gives his boyfriend an assessing look.
“You didn’t tell me that.”
Sunoo rolls his eyes. “Not like it would have come up. I haven’t seen any of them in months.”
Sunghoon laughs lightly. “It isn’t our fault you’re so busy.”
Sunoo’s scoff is accusatory.
“Excuse me, who is the one who always says they don’t even have time to grab lunch whenever I text you?”
Sunghoon lifts his chin haughtily. “Wouldn’t know. Jungwon takes care of all of my business messages.”
The sound Sunoo makes is so offended that Sunghoon can’t help but smile.
“Did you just call me business?” He gasps. “Guess it’s true what they say, fame really does cost you your friends.”
“And yet the only one it cost me was you.” He teases, leaning into Heeseung’s side. “Have you ever thought that maybe you’re the problem here?”
Sunoo rolls his eyes. “You’re such a bitch.”
“Right back at you.” He replies, smile never slipping from his face.
Heeseung and Niki are staring between them in confusion, seeming unsure of whether this was an actual argument or just playful teasing.
“Don’t look at me like that,” Sunoo grumbles, turning on Niki with a glare. “This is how we bond.”
“He’s just jealous that I’m prettier than him.” Sunghoon explains to Niki who still looks slightly confused. “But I’ve learned to overlook that flaw of his.”
“Flaw?” Sunoo scoffs. “Bitch, I’m flawless.”
“Of course you are.” Niki quickly agrees when it looks like Sunghoon is gearing up for another jab. “Who could be better than you?”
The haughty look Sunoo turns on Sunghoon is enough that he goes for a retort anyways but is stopped by Heeseung’s hand landing on his leg.
“How was practice, Hoon?” He asks desperately.
Sunghoon gives him an unimpressed look but allows himself to be steered away from their playful argument.
“It was alright. You could’ve come to the gym with me and it would’ve been better.” He states with an accusatory glare.
Heeseung raises his hands up in surrender.
“That’s an experience I only need once. I prefer being able to use my legs.”
Sunghoon rolls his eyes. He acts like Sunghoon had tried to kill him when in reality Heeseung had more or less just watched Sunghoon workout instead of actually working out himself. He’ll let him get away for now, but they will be picking up this conversation again later.
“Jungwon called and said one of my old sponsors has decided that since our relationship isn’t a hot topic anymore that I’m no longer a stain to their image and tried to pick me back up.”
“I hope he said no.” Niki frowns, seeming as repulsed by the whole thing as Sunghoon feels.
“He did.” Sunghoon assures. “Jungwon would never let anyone disrespect me and get away with it.”
“Your friends are all too good for you.” Sunoo huffs.
Sunghoon smiles, crooked and arrogant the way he knows Heeseung loves.
“So are yours, but here we are.” At Heeseung’s confused look he quickly explains. “Sunoo is in the same idol group as one of K’s friends.”
“Yes, and speaking of which, I’m offended that I wasn’t given an invitation to Jungwon’s birthday party but a bunch of strangers were.” Sunoo states.
“No one can get in touch with you.” Sunghoon waves off. “Why? Are you suddenly free and able to go?”
Sunoo turns his nose up at him. “No. Maki might be off, but I have an ost to record.”
“What a shame.” He drawls.
Sunoo huffs at the unconcerned tone Sunghoon had used but doesn’t immediately respond.
“Don’t be jealous of my success.”
Sunghoon arches a brow. “I’m one of the most popular celebrities in South Korea and on my way to my next Olympics. What’s there to be jealous of?”
Niki coughs, distracting Sunoo from whatever comeback he had prepared. The way Sunoo looks at him is fond and loving as he rolls his eyes.
“Alright, fine, I’m being nice.” Sunoo concedes, turning back to Sunghoon with a curious tilt of his head. “How is everyone doing?”
Sunghoon shrugs. “All disgustingly in love aside from Jake.”
“And speaking of love,” Sunoo begins, voice teasing which is all the warning Sunghoon needs. “How did K handle all this?” He waves a hand indicating all of Heeseung and Sunghoon.
Heeseung purses his lips and turns on Sunghoon with a raised brow.
“Did everyone know?”
Sunoo laughs, loud and way too pleased with himself.
“Not like it was hard to see.” He scoffs. “Everyone with eyes could see how K felt about him. It’s practically a miracle that they didn’t end up dating.”
“Quit exaggerating.” Sunghoon gripes. “He’s part of the reason Heeseung and I were able to stay together.”
“What kind of fool helps the person they love date someone else?” Sunoo scoffs. “He’s too selfless for his own good.”
“We haven’t felt that way about each other in a long time.” Sunghoon corrects. “And he has a boyfriend who is absolutely perfect for him.”
“I’ve seen the pictures.” He says excitedly. “He’s pretty. Has Jungwon tried to recruit him yet?”
“The first time they met.” Heeseung confirms. “Jo’s made to be a model. He’s also Japanese.” He says, directing the last bit to Niki.
Niki perks up, resembling an excited puppy. “Really?”
Sunghoon nods. “Just wait, I’m sure K is already planning how to adopt you.”
“I’ve heard Taki talk about him before but I haven’t gotten to meet him yet.” He says with a smile. “It would be nice to have more Japanese friends in the industry.”
“I’m sure he’ll love you.” Sunoo agrees. “He’s got a soft spot for puppy types. One more reason I’ll never understand why he fell for you.” He says the last part to Sunghoon, and he glares in response.
“He likes feeling needed.” Sunghoon explains. “I just happened to be the neediest person around at the time.”
“You still are.” Sunoo fires back.
Sunghoon turns on Heeseung, waiting for him to defend him. His boyfriend stares back, eyes blinking innocently but mouth staying firmly shut.
Sunghoon scoffs, turning to grab his phone. “I’m telling Jungwon to draft up our divorce agreement.”
Heeseung has the nerve to laugh, gripping Sunghoon’s hands and leaning over to hook his chin onto his shoulder. “Awe don’t be like that, Hoon. I love that you’re needy.”
“Just keep digging that hole.” Niki mutters with a shake of his head.
Sunghoon laughs, directing a kind smile at Niki.
“How did your talk with the company go this morning?”
Niki tips his hand uncertainly. “They more or less agreed to stay out of our relationship,” He grips Sunoo’s hand firmly. “But my situation is a bit different from Heeseung’s since we aren’t planning on going public or anything like that.”
“Why not?” He can’t help but ask.
“I don’t want it to affect my group.” Sunoo says with a frown. “They already said they would stand by me, but I can’t just risk my group’s future for my own selfish reasons.”
Sunghoon can understand that, mainly because one of his biggest worries when his own relationship was revealed was that it would affect his friend’s lives and careers when they tried to defend him. But still, having to hide your relationship all the time must be exhausting.
“Maybe when things have settled down a bit we’ll think about it.” Niki continues. “After Heeseung and Jay came out it kind of opened the door for idols to finally admit to not just their relationships but also their sexuality. I know of at least three other idols who are planning to come out this year after seeing the responses to you and Heeseung’s relationship.”
While he can see that the fans are mostly supportive of their relationship at this point, Sunghoon can’t help but think about all the hate they had received throughout their time together. He remembers the protest trucks and the fans camping outside of the rink with their signs telling him to dump Heeseung or he’d regret it. At the end of the day he guesses it has to come down to whether you’re willing to accept the good with the bad or if you’d prefer the difficult but more secure secret relationship route.
“I didn’t plan to be an inspiration or anything like that.” Heeseung grumbles, sounding a bit embarrassed. “And things have hardly been easy for us.”
“Obviously,” Sunoo rolls his eyes. “But before people didn’t even know it was possible to be gay and an idol. As annoying as it is, you’re the ones who paved the way for the rest of us.”
Heeseung looks over at Sunghoon, seeming completely lost on how to respond to that. He knows the feeling as he isn’t sure what to say either. It would be one thing to be looked up to for something they had meant to do, but to be an inspiration after they had been outed without having any choice was kind of an awkward position to be in. If anything, Jay should be the one people admire, he had come out and admitted to dating Jungwon without any outside influence.
“Don’t look at me,” Sunghoon says, gently pushing Heeseung’s face back forward. “I’m nowhere close to being the first openly gay figure skater.”
“But probably the first from Korea, right?” Niki asks with an adorable tilt of his head.
Sunghoon shrugs. “Maybe. I don’t really keep up with other skater’s personal lives.”
“Except for when they’re hitting on you.” Sunoo teases. “I can’t tell you the amount of times Jake has called me with updates of all the people that tried to hook up with Sunghoon over the years.”
Niki raises his brows and Sunghoon can see Heeseung frowning out of the corner of his eye.
“But you never said yes, right?” Niki questions.
Sunghoon determinedly does not look at Heeseung.
“I didn’t date any of them.” He replies which really isn’t an answer at all.
Sunoo nods sagely. “True, he’s a heartbreaker after all. Our darling Sunghoon was a one-night stand kind of man before he met Heeseung.”
“I mean technically we were a one-night stand too.” Heeseung says with a short laugh that makes Sunghoon smile.
“Exactly.” Sunghoon says. “It’s easier than dealing in relationships.”
“Wouldn’t that be messy with the other skaters?” Niki asks.
Sunghoon shakes his head. “We had a mutual understanding. Plus, it isn’t like they were from the Korean team, so I only have to see them a couple times a year.”
Sunoo sighs, sinking back into the cushions. “Most of them have already retired, haven't they?”
Sunghoon hums. “All but one Japanese skater. He’ll be my biggest competition at Worlds and the Olympics.”
“I can’t believe you’re an Olympian.” Niki says, sounding awestruck. “What will you do if you win the gold medal this time? Is there anything higher than that?”
“No.” Sunghoon frowns. “If I win gold then I’ll have achieved everything I can in the competitive skating world. I’ll probably keep competing till I’m forced to retire and then I’ll do ice shows or maybe help coach. I haven’t really thought about it too hard since I’ve still got a few years left in me if all goes according to plan.”
“But what’s the point when you’ve already won?” Sunoo ponders. “Isn’t it kind of boring at that point.”
Sunghoon shakes his head. “The ice is where I’m made to be. The competitions prove I’ve earned my place there, but they aren’t the reason I skate. Once I get my Olympic gold then I’ll go on to try for a three-peat at worlds and try my best to set a world record before I retire.”
“A world record?” Niki says in awe. “Wouldn’t that score be insanely high?”
Sunghoon shrugs. “Current overall total record is three hundred twenty-two point fifty-nine while my personal best is three hundred twelve. But that was before I improved my program this past month. I have no doubt I can do it if I give it my all.”
“It just seems insane to know someone who might one day hold a world record.” Heeseung says with a short laugh.
Sunghoon can’t help but smile. “I already hold the world record for the short program.”
The looks of shock on his friend’s faces are almost enough to make him laugh. Who did they think they were dealing with here? He’s the world champion for a reason after all.
“No wonder you’re so arrogant all the time.” Sunoo rolls his eyes. “You let all that success go straight to your head.”
“Don’t talk like you’re humble.” Sunghoon fires back. “Just wait, when you have to enlist and shave your head I’m going to show up and take a thousand pictures to humiliate you forever.”
Sunoo makes an affronted sound. “I can do the same thing to you, bitch.”
Sunghoon smirks, leaning forward and bracing his elbows on his knees.
“Ah, but you’re forgetting that I won gold at the Asian Games a couple years ago. I’m exempt.”
“You are?” Heeseung asks in surprise.
Sunghoon nods. “Yep, so there’s no head shaving in my future, although I’d probably still look great.”
“It would be a shame to shave your head when you have such good hair.” Niki agrees absently.
Sunoo smacks at his boyfriend’s arm. “Aren’t you supposed to be defending me?”
Niki looks rightfully aggrieved at that. “What am I supposed to do? We’re in his house, if you don’t like what he says then we can just leave.”
“That’s probably for the best anyways.” Heeseung says, glancing at his phone. “Sunghoon is probably exhausted and he has a couple long weeks ahead of him.”
Sunoo sighs but dutifully pushes up from the couch with Niki right behind him.
“Fine, I’ll let you get away this time.” He says with a warning finger pointed at Sunghoon. “But next time you won’t be so lucky.”
“Whatever helps you sleep at night.” Sunghoon fires back.
Heeseung walks them out, with Sunghoon too tired to even consider standing up if it isn’t to go straight to the shower and then bed.
He leans back, staring up at the blank white ceiling above him. It really has been a long day, one that he was ready to be done with.
Heeseung’s face enters his field of vision, looking down at him with all the love and care that Sunghoon could ever want.
“Are you going to make me carry you?” He asks with a teasing smile.
Sunghoon huffs a laugh. “As if you could.”
“Don’t tempt me to try.” Heeseung warns.
“Please don’t.” He pleads. “I don’t have the energy to pick myself up if you drop me.”
Heeseung laughs as he comes around the couch and grabs his hands to help pull him to his feet.
After that they go through the motions of getting ready for bed like they’ve already done this a thousand times before. It’s a comforting atmosphere that Sunghoon had never known was possible for him.
Heeseung waits until they are securely in bed to broach the subject that has most likely been bothering him all day.
“Do you have something you’re keeping from me?” Heeseung asks, voice sounding calm, but Sunghoon knows he’s probably worried.
He turns over to face Heeseung in bed, staring into those beautiful bambi eyes that he loves so much. He wouldn’t lie to Heeseung, not anymore, even if he only ever wanted to shield him from the darker parts of himself, he knows that Heeseung deserves to know it all.
"Why haven't you slept with me since we got back together?" He asks, no sugar coating and no build up.
Heeseung seems startled, eyes going wide before settling into fond understanding.
"Honestly, you've just seemed so tired lately that I didn't want to push you when you're already giving so much energy to your work."
So, K was more or less correct, though that isn't much of a surprise. Sunghoon had learned a long time ago that K's assumptions were usually reliable which is why he went to him for advice so often.
Sunghoon nods, accepting that answer without argument.
"That isn't the only thing, is it?" Heeseung asks worriedly.
Guess it shows how much they've grown that Heeseung can tell when he's bothered by something.
“My mom called me this morning.” He says slowly, feeling out the words carefully.
Heeseung scoots over a bit, making their elbows knock against each other and bringing his hand up to the pillow to cover Sunghoon’s.
“She said my sister finds our relationship disgusting.” He admits, unable to help the way his brows pinch in worry. “I don’t want to believe her, but maybe she’s telling the truth, maybe Yeji hates me for how I abandoned her.”
“I don’t believe that.” Heeseung says softly, squeezing his hand. “After everything I’ve heard about your mom I have no doubt she’s lying to you just to hurt you.”
Sunghoon knows that, had heard almost the same thing from K earlier, but hearing it from Heeseung who didn’t even know his mother was just further proof that even outsiders could see how toxic his mother truly is.
“You know Yeji always used to cry when I went away for training or competitions; she said I was leaving her behind and that she would never forgive me.” He laughs a little, though it isn’t funny at all. “I guess she was right in the end.”
“How did you end up leaving home?” Heeseung asks in barely more than a whisper.
Sunghoon sighs, letting his eyes fall shut as the exhaustion of the day begins to bear down on him.
“I didn’t plan it. We were still in college, so I didn’t live at home full time, but because of how my mom was I still had most everything I owned there. I was packing my bags to go to train in Japan for a couple months and while I was packing my mom came in and started yelling about how I should stop being selfish and stay home so she could oversee my coaching herself. When she finally left my room, I just started throwing everything I could in my bags and walked out the door.”
“Where did you go?”
“We kept the apartment until we were out of school and by that point I was making enough from competitions and sponsorships to afford my own place. My mom kept dragging me home from time to time after that until Jungwon stepped in and filed for a protective order against her. She stopped for a while after that, but once it expired that’s when the calls started coming in again.”
Heeseung shifts even further over, pulling Sunghoon into his arms. He goes easily, slipping comfortably beneath his chin and listening to the soothing sound of his heart.
“I thought maybe one day she would change, that she would realize that she almost killed me, but she’s still the same as she was all those years ago. Nothing I do is ever good enough and she reminds me of it every chance she gets.”
“You’re amazing, Hoon. Every time I feel like I couldn’t be more in awe of you, but you continue surprising me every single day. You went through so much to get where you are and I am so proud to be able to stand beside you and call you my boyfriend.”
“Sappy.” He mutters, hoping that Heeseung can’t tell just how embarrassed he is by those words.
“Only because I love you so much.” Heeseung responds, pressing a kiss to his brow. “I never knew I could love someone as much as I love you.”
“I love you too.” He says softly, hoping Heeseung can hear the sincerity in the words. “And thank you for still being here, even when I’m hateful or keeping things from you.”
“I don’t mind you keeping things from me.” Heeseung brushes a finger down his cheek, tracing the edge of his jaw lightly. “I know you’ll tell me when you’re ready.”
Sunghoon falls asleep that night with a lighter heart than he has had all day. Tomorrow could be horrible, his mother might continue making his days worse, but at this moment he has Heeseung at his side and that is more than enough to make up for it.