Chapter Text
V.
Chloe Decker woke up with a pounding headache and the distinct taste of regret on her tongue.
She groaned as the morning light crept through the blinds, piercing through her skull like a goddamn spotlight. She squeezed her eyes shut, but it was too late—her brain was already awake, pounding against her temples in protest.
She shouldn’t have had that much wine.
Correction: she shouldn’t have downed the whole bottle like it was the only thing keeping her from breaking apart completely.
What the hell had she been thinking? Oh, right. She hadn’t been thinking. How could she think with Lucifer’s own thoughts taking center stage?
Dragging herself out of bed felt like moving through cement. Her limbs were heavy, and her stomach was in open rebellion. She ran a hand through her tangled hair and winced at the dull ache behind her eyes. Right. Hangover. Fantastic.
But there was no time to dwell on it. She had a kid to feed, a school run to make, and a full workday ahead.
The next moment, a soft shuffle in the hallway pulled her attention away from her self-loathing.
“Mom?”
Chloe blinked at the small voice and looked up to see Trixie standing in the doorway, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.
Shit .
Chloe straightened immediately, ignoring the way her head throbbed at the movement. “Hey, monkey,” she said, mustering up a smile. “You’re already up.”
Trixie squinted at her, scanning her mother like she could see right through the forced normalcy.
“Are you okay, mom?”
God, how did her daughter always know?
Chloe sighed, leaning forward to rest her elbows on her knees. “Yeah, sweetie. Just a little tired.”
Trixie padded into the room, climbing onto the bed.
“Did you and Lucifer have a fight?” Trixie asked eventually.
Chloe swallowed, staring at the opposite wall.
It wasn’t exactly a fight. He hadn’t yelled. She hadn’t yelled. But it had felt like one.
It had felt like losing.
“We just… disagreed on something,” she said carefully. “But it's okay,” she reassured, tucking a strand of hair behind Trixie’s ear. “Sometimes grown-ups just… have bad days.”
Trixie tilted her head. “Did Lucifer have a bad day too?”
Chloe hesitated.
Lucifer had been fine when she left—he had been thrilled to have his invulnerability back. But he wasn’t fine. Not really.
She had seen it in his eyes, the way he was grasping onto control like a lifeline. And the worst part? He didn’t even realize that he was drowning.
“I don’t know,” she admitted softly. “I don’t think he does either.”
Trixie was quiet for a long moment before she said, “You should talk to him.”
Chloe let out a quiet laugh. “You sound like Linda.”
Trixie grinned. “Dr. Linda is smart.”
Chloe sighed, wrapping an arm around her daughter and pressing a kiss in her hair as she gently brushed her dark curls.
“Yeah,” she murmured. “She really is.”
As she spoke, Chloe felt a deep ache—a mix of exhaustion, disappointment, and the painful realization that the distance between her and Lucifer was widening again. Her heart felt heavy, but she also knew she couldn’t let this go on. Something was very wrong, and she needed help to understand it all.
After a quick breakfast that did little to soothe her nerves, Chloe finally reached for her phone. With trembling fingers, she dialed the number of Linda’s office. It was unusual for her to seek out therapy, but the night had exposed cracks in both her heart and her mind that she could no longer ignore.
Less than 30 minutes in a stopwatch, Chloe found herself sitting across from Dr. Linda Martin, stirring a cup of coffee she had no intention of drinking.
Linda, for her part, had her therapist face on—calm, patient, waiting. But Chloe could feel the curiosity simmering beneath the surface.
“So,” Linda prompted, “Lucifer got his invulnerability back, and instead of feeling relieved, you feel like he’s pushing you away.”
Chloe nodded. “Because he is pushing me away.”
Linda sighed, setting her notepad down. “I’m not saying you’re wrong, but… isn’t that kind of his thing? Whenever something shakes his sense of self, he tries to claw back control? Besides, with everything you both went through yesterday, no wonder he had to hold onto something— anything .” Linda paused. She uncrossed her legs, then shifted, crossing them the other way with an absent-minded motion. “You know it's a lot for Lucifer to take in. He had to deal with the aftermath of well, you know, having sex with you, then his mojo being gone but yours to behold, and you both almost bit the dust. Lucifer twice . On the same day.”
Chloe's shoulders slumped. “You're right. We could've died yesterday. If I hadn’t been able to hear his thoughts and read his panicked gaze… ”
Linda blinked. “Able to what?”
Chloe exhaled. “Yeah. Apparently, it’s some weird evolution of his guard dropping. Now, I can hear what’s going on in his head—his mind is completely defenseless around me.”
Linda’s eyes widened, and then—“Oh my Devil.” She leaned forward, gripping her notepad like it was the most exciting case study of her life. “Do you understand what this means? You have front-row access to Lucifer Morningstar’s unfiltered thoughts.”
Chloe pinched the bridge of her nose. “Trust me, it’s not as fun as it sounds.”
Linda looked positively giddy. “Are you kidding me? That must be like—like a freaking rollercoaster. A very lustful one.”
Chloe gave her a flat look. “Yeah. That part’s… definitely there.”
Linda bit her lip, clearly holding back laughter. “Oh God. Or rather, oh Devil.”
Despite herself, Chloe let out a small chuckle, shaking her head.
The moment of levity passed quickly, though, replaced by the weight of what had brought her here in the first place.
“I just… I don’t know how to help him,” Chloe admitted. “He’s shutting me out, and I can’t force my way in. I just—” She swallowed hard. “I don’t know what to do.”
Linda studied her for a long moment before leaning back with a thoughtful expression.
“Maybe,” she said slowly, “you don’t have to force your way in. Maybe you're the one that has to let Lucifer in —the whole package; his crazy antics, his relentless need to control everything, his fear of disappointing you…of losing you—like when your life is threatened before his helpless gaze.
Chloe looked down at her coffee, absorbing that.
“I… I messed up,” she sighed. “I hadn't considered things from that angle. And maybe if Lucifer is invulnerable again... No, not maybe—surely—it's only out of fear of something happening to…me.”
Meanwhile, Lucifer was brooding.
Well, brooding was putting it lightly. He was pacing in Lux, a drink in one hand and his own thoughts clawing at him like restless demons.
Which was exactly when Maze walked in.
She took one look at him and rolled her eyes. “Oh great. You’re doing that again.”
Lucifer scowled. “Doing what?”
“The whole ‘pretending you’re fine while actually spiraling into a self-destructive abyss’ thing.” She grabbed a bottle from the bar and poured herself a drink. “It’s getting old.”
A bitter irony played across Lucifer’s lips as he tried to mask the turmoil beneath. “I am not spiraling.”
“Yes, you are. And I know exactly why—Decker was spiraling right down to the bottom of that bottle of red wine last night.”
At that, Lucifer stiffened. His heart skipped a beat, and for a brief moment, his eyes betrayed a flash of vulnerability before he recovered. “Did she?”
“She did. Seriously, did you really shoot yourself last night?”
“…That was a much needed experiment. But first, how do you even know that? Did she tell you?”
“No. You perfectly know that I hate listening to one's problems. But she did tell Linda.” Maze took a sip, then leveled him with a stern look. “You screwed up.”
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me.” Mazikeen set her glass down with a clink. “You had Chloe. You let her in. And then the second you got your powers back, you slammed the door in her face.”
At the mention of Chloe, a deep, almost unnoticeable tremor passed through Lucifer’s hands. He clenched his jaw so hard that his knuckles whitened. “I needed to regain control.”
“No, you needed to let go.” Maze leaned in, eyes dark. “Even though you hate that.”
Lucifer’s fingers tightened around his glass, the pressure a silent confession of the inner conflict raging within him.
“Here’s the thing, Lucifer,” Maze continued, voice sharp as a blade. “You might be invulnerable again. But if you keep this scaredy-devil acting up? You’re gonna lose her.” With that, she downed the rest of her drink.
The silence that followed was thick, suffocating. In that heavy quiet, Lucifer’s internal battle manifested in the slight tremor of his hand and the deep furrows on his brow. His grip on the glass was so tight it might have shattered. His jaw worked relentlessly, his mind scrambling for a retort—a way to disprove her—but all he found was the bitter, undeniable taste of her truth echoing in every beat of his heart. Turning toward the bar, he poured himself another drink as if he could drown out her words.
He hated that.
Lucifer downed his drink in one go, then set the glass down with a decisive clink. “I don’t want to lose her.” He turned to Maze, his expression carefully composed, yet his eyes betrayed him—burning with another kind of vulnerability. It was a different kind of wound, one that cut deeper than flesh, slipping past his ‘new found’ complete invincibility to strike at something far more fragile—his heart, his very soul. “But, tell me, why would she ever want this? Want me?” He gestured vaguely to himself. “I put her in danger just by existing. I make her weak.”
Maze barked a sharp laugh. “Oh, that’s rich. You think you make her weak?” She took another step forward, close enough now that Lucifer could see the flicker of anger behind her smirk. “Chloe Decker is the strongest damn human I’ve ever met, and that includes every soldier, assassin, and psycho I’ve gone up against. And you? You make her stronger.”
Lucifer looked away. “Then why does it feel like the opposite?”
Maze sighed, rubbing a hand over her face before fixing him with a harder stare. “Because you’re an idiot.”
He blinked. “Pardon?”
“You’re so used to people leaving you, to people hurting you, that the second something good happens, you sabotage it before they can.” She tilted her head. “You ever think maybe you are the one making yourself weak?”
Lucifer opened his mouth, then closed it.
Maze studied him, her patience was obviously wearing thin. “You know what really pisses me off?” she asked. “You want to believe the worst. You keep acting like Chloe’s better off without you, but you don’t even give her the damn choice.”
Lucifer frowned. “I—”
“No,” Maze interrupted, jabbing a finger at his chest. “You’re acting like a coward.”
Lucifer’s eyes darkened. “Watch it, Mazikeen.”
Maze smirked, but there was no humor in it. “Or what? You’ll push me away, too?” She leaned in, voice dropping to something quieter but no less sharp. “Go ahead, Lucifer. Keep running. Keep telling yourself she’s better off. But one day? You’re gonna look up, and she won’t be there anymore.”
Lucifer inhaled sharply, the thought striking somewhere deep.
“Then what?” Maze pressed. “Gonna throw yourself another pity party? Drink yourself into oblivion? Pretend it doesn’t hurt while you waste the rest of eternity being miserable?”
Lucifer swallowed, his throat suddenly dry.
Maze pulled back, tilting her head as she studied him one last time. Then, with a final shake of her head, she turned on her heel and strode toward the exit.
But just before she left, she threw one last dagger over her shoulder.
“You want control, Lucifer? Here’s a thought—stop being such a damn selfish cherub, get yourself together like a grown man, and fight to be with her—whatever it costs you, it’ll never be badly spent.”
And with that, she was gone, leaving Lucifer standing alone in the middle of Lux, his thoughts a chaotic storm of emotions he couldn’t quite outrun.