Chapter Text
”You need a break.” Spoke the idiot. Kakucho. Talking like he knew better about what he needed, what Mikey needed.
And the latter was more important, like always. Mikey’s needs came first, especially now, with the parasite slowly eating him away.
Haru’s throat tightened. He shouldn’t have agreed to it, ever. He should have…
“I can stay with him.”
“I’m not leaving him.”
“Then you die of exhaustion, unable to keep taking care of him.”
Ouch. He tightened his hold on the steering wheel and took a sharp turn, hoping that the centrifugal force would slam the idiot against the door. It didn’t.
There was no way he could leave Mikey alone. Nor with Kakucho. C’mon.
Mikey needed him.
(And yet he was clearly failing to provide for him and to keep him away from the edge of dying. Fuck.)
“One night.” He gritted his teeth when the red light stopped them.
Fuck!
The idea of Mikey dying on him again scratched something unpleasant in his brain, something he knew too well how to deal with.
But he couldn’t.
He saw how terrified Mikey was last time he found him high off his ass in the bathroom — and he wouldn’t forget the morning after.
So yeah, for that, he needed to get out. Away. Run away for one night, just one night. To stop watching the love of his life withering away for one night, and forget about the stupid idea of a second pregnancy if Mikey survived and it wasn’t a girl.
Fuck!
“Just one night,” he repeated, already hating himself for being a selfish bastard. “And if something happens to him, you lose your head.”
Maybe if he turned his head, he would notice Kakucho’s surprised face — the man didn’t expect him to actually agree and put up relatively little protest.
The itch didn’t go away, no matter how many lines he took, how many pills he swallowed, how much shit he smoked, hoping that the next one would do the trick.
It didn’t
Neither did gin, which some stupid waiter brought his way. That didn’t stop him from downing it straight from the bottle, ‘cause why bother with glasses when his beloved was dying at their home.
“Shit.”
He swung his arms when someone grabbed his shoulder, turning him to the side. When did he even lie down?
“Not you….” He groaned in frustration, seeing the scarred face and green eyes looking at him with worry.
“How much did you take?”
“Not enough.”
It was honestly a miracle that Takeomi could understand his slurred speech, with years of experience on his side.
“Oh, I think it was more than enough.” The older Akashi pried the half-empty bottle of gin from Haruchiyo’s clammy hand and set it back on the table next to some empty ziplock baggies and ruined some unfinished lines. Fuck. Shit. “Look at me, hey!”
He snapped his fingers in front of Haru’s face, trying to assess the damage.
“I can’t do this…”
“You can’t look at me?”
Omi watched his brother curl up on himself and cover his face as he started muttering something. Jesus fucking Christ. He wanted to snap his fingers again, maybe even poke his idiot brother to get his attention. To try and get his brain from the state he was currently in and bring his attention to the real world.
Instead, as if driven by something weird, he leaned over him and caught a sentence that made blood drain from his face.
“I can’t do this, I can’t. I can’t be a father alone.”
Be a what?
“Haru…?”
“I can’t.” His brother sniffled, and Takeomi looked around to make sure they were alone in the vip area. No one should see that. No one should probably hear that either. “I can’t choose it over him. That thing…” The sentence remained unfinished when Haruchiyo sobbed.
No. This couldn’t be. No. Just…. Just fucking no.
“Let’s sober you up, okay?” Takeomi offered instead of considering the possibility of his baby brother getting their boss pregnant.
With a strain, he pulled Haruchiyo up into a sitting position and wiped his face with a napkin.
Dear Lord.
The next day, Takeomi poured two cups of coffee and placed them on the kitchen table next to a bowl of berries and crackers. Haruchiyo woke up a few minutes before and bolted towards the bathroom. God bless, he actually got the right door.
He had texted Mikey last night to let him know about Haru’s whereabouts after he’d hauled his brother to the apartment. The Boss had immediately called him back, demanding more answers, but that really wasn't the right moment for that, so he had cut it short and promised they would talk later.
Priorities.
It wasn’t the first time he had to handle Haru’s wasted ass but probably the worst one. In the end he didn’t learn how much shit his little brother had taken. Adding that to the things he heard while the man was puking his guts out?
They had to talk.
“I have to go.” Was obviously the first thing Haruchiyo spoke after appearing in the kitchen door. But they all knew if he wanted to just go, he wouldn’t announce it — he would just leave.
A very bad sign.
“I made coffee. Sit.”
And they both knew Haruchiyo shouldn’t listen, and yet he did, pulling the mug towards himself and warming his hands against the porcelain. Honestly, he looked like shit. Omi should probably feed him something real, but it’s not like putting more food in front of Haru wouldn’t scare him off, probably.
They didn’t have that kind of bond to share a nice breakfast and chat about their lives. They never did.
But they had to talk.
“So umm…” How should he even start this? “Mikey’s pregnant?” Great start — on the other side of the table, Haruchiyo tensed visibly, which urged Takeomi to explain some things. “You were mumbling a lot yesterday, don’t know if you remember. I added some things together.”
“He is. 15 weeks.”
Yeah, okay. “Do you two already know if it’s a boy or a girl?” He pushed the bowl towards Haruchiyo. The way his brother spoke of the baby made it seem like an ominous ‘ it’, but at 15 weeks, it was already possible to check the gender, right?
“We don’t know, but Mikey wants a girl. He said…” Haruchiyo swallowed and grabbed his cup tighter, bringing it up to his lips but not drinking, just covering his face. “He said if it’s a boy, he still wants a girl.”
Takeomi blinked a few times in confusion. After all the crying yesterday, that made it sound like Mikey was dying because of the current pregnancy? He wanted another one?
“He what?” The look on Haru’s face made him backtrack and calm down his tone really quickly. “Correct me if I’m wrong,” he started in a calmer voice. “I thought you didn’t want a baby.
“People change their minds, you know?” Oh wow, what a terrible lie. “Mikey said he wants a family. With me.”
So that’s where it came from. A whim of Sano that Haruchiyo followed without considering his own happiness and personal take on this matter. Just like he has followed Shinichiro’s wishes back in the day.
Mikey wanted a baby.
“He already has a family: you.” Takeomi sighed. “I mean… if he wants to make it bigger, that’s amazing for him, but you’re clearly drowning, Haruchiyo. Have you looked in the mirror recently? You look…” like shit “tired as fuck.”
“You think it’s amazing?” Haruchiyo raised his voice. “That leech will kill him and I can’t…” The younger Akashi shook his head and stood up abruptly, slamming the cup against the table. “I’m not drowning! I’ve been taking care of Mikey on my own for months, dealing with Bonten and making sure to protect this secret.”
He pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. Fuck. He didn’t suspect it was bad to the point that Haru would spill while sober.
“So he isn’t in love with the idea of bringing kids to this world without a care that it’s killing his mate?”
“Shut up! I don’t need to hear any of that. There was a reason why I didn't tell you about the baby, okay? This isn’t your business, this isn’t your family!”
This was going so well. Deep breath in and out. At least Haruchiyo didn’t storm off yet, too busy trying to protect whatever Mikey has decided.
“I’m just asking who’s gonna take care of you,” he explained calmly. “Cause that didn’t get covered on your list, and it seems Mikey isn’t seeing the state you’re in.”
“There is no state! I’m fine. I appreciate what you did last night, but I don't need you. So leave me the fuck alone.”
This one hurt, every time. But over the years, Omi’s learned to deal with this pain. He made too many mistakes for Haruchiyo to want him around; it was enough that he accepted him.
“How about I drive you home and then grant your wish?”
He had promised Mikey a talk anyway.