Chapter Text
When they got into the drawing-room, and had sat down to their tea and chocolate, although Lottie didn't take any, she seemed like quite herself again. Adelaide had joined them as well, and made a little card party, in the course of which Laura Lee's father came in for what he called for his ‘dish of tea.’
When their game was over, he sat down beside Lottie on the sofa, and asked her, a little anxiously, whenever she had heard from her mother since her arrival. Lottie didn't reply at first, and only shook her head.
“Do you know when a letter will reach you?” he carefully asked.
“I sadly can’t tell” she answered ambiguously, she opened her mouth but slightly hesitated. Laura Lee noticed and knew this couldn't lead to any good.
“I have been thinking about leaving; you have been so kind to me, and I have just given you trouble with my behaviour in return.” she sighed before continuing, “if it will be alright with you” she said.
Laura Lee felt her heart sink as a sadness overflowed her. . She couldn't leave, not now, not now when she just got her..
Lottie looked down in her lap, avoiding the sadness in Laura Lees eyes. “I wish to take a carriage tomorrow and continue the way my mother was supposed to take me. I know where to find her, though I won't tell you.”
Laura Lee was just about to open her mouth, protesting against what she had suggested, when her father abruptly raised from his seat.
“You can't think such thing!” her father exclaimed to Laura Lees great relief. He let out an annoyed huff before carefully thinking over his words and carefully sitting back again, apologizing for his sudden words.
“We can't afford to lose you so, and I won't consent to you leaving us, except under the care of your mother, who said you should remain with us until her return.” he said as he was able to calm himself down.
“I should be quite happy if I knew you’d heard from her; but if you leave now this evening the mysterious disease that has been invading our neighbourhoods might take you too. I grown even more alarmed every day; and you, my beautiful guest, I do feel a responsibility for you just like I do for Laura Lee,” he said as he looked over to Laura Lee who gently smiled, grateful that her father was able to speak her words for her.
“I shall do my best to try to get in contact with your mother; and one thing is certain, you can't leave us without her presence. Both me and Laura Lee would be quite sad if you left without telling us..” he finished, worrying covering his face. Lottie looked at him before turning to face the floor. She had her hand folded in her lap.
Lottie, who was bewildered by the words, didn't know how to react. She knew her mother didn't want her, and is still unwanted. To feel like she was allowed to stay somewhere without feeling like a burden was unfamiliar, but she couldn't help the soft and gentle smile that appeared on her face.
“Thank you sir” was the only sentence she was able to say before meeting the sweet look of Laura Lee's eyes. Laura Lees father on the other hand was very much caught off guard.
He had never seen a proper expression on Lottie's face since the day she arrived. Laura Lee let out a small giggle at her fathers reaction, totally forgetting that she didn't show much emotion unless it was the two of them.
“You have all been very kind to me” Lottie said looking around the room, meeting the face of Adelaide, her father and at Laura Lee as she said so. “I’ve never been as happy as I have been during my stay here, as in your beautiful pallas and the company of your daughter.”
.
Laura Lee accompanied Lottie to her room, both side by side in complete but comfortable silence. They entered the room and Laura Lee went to sit at the edge of the bed while Lottie prepared for bed.
Laura Lee couldn't help herself but follow Lottie with her eyes. Lottie went to her dressing table to get rid of all her pins in her hair, letting her hair fall in front of her eyes. One thing was certain, and that was that Lottie wasn't shy.
She didn't care to go and get changed in her dressing room, she would only turn around and change right then and there to her nightgown. Laura Lee instantly looked down in her lap and felt her face fill with blood, an annoying warmth spreading quickly over her cheeks.
Why was she reacting like this? She had been told by the common girls in Batsto that it was normal for girls and women to change in the same room. This was perfectly normal… still she couldn't help the nervous fidgeting off her hands.
She only dared to glance up again when the rustling of fabric was silent and she could see the white silk slightly pool on the floor. She started to think, a bit too much maybe..
Laura Lee had told about how she got Leonard, and why he is wherever she went, her dreams, how she felt about her religion, but she had never received anything from Lottie. Lottie kept almost everything to herself. Yes she might know about her weird habits of locking her door at night, their common dream, but nothing else.
She knows nothing about her family, where she was traveling from that night , why she never joined church or their morning and evening prayers. She knows almost nothing about her .
“Do you think” Laura Lee started, feeling the anxiety draped over her heart like a thick blanket, “that you will ever trust fully in me?”
The question made Lottie stop in her tracks and turn around to face her. She smiled but made no answer, only continuing her soft and gentle smile. This was something Lottie had done before, gently smile and stay quiet whenever she asked a little personal question.
“You won't answer will you?” Laura Lee said with a sigh, fingers fidgeting in her lap, “I don't mind if you answer properly or not… I shouldn't have asked.” Laura Lee said a bit frustrated, not in Lottie but herself.
“It makes sense that you asked me about it, Laura Lee, or anything. I don't think you know how much you mean to me, but I have promised my mother, and I’m afraid to break that promise.” Why? Laura Lee wanted to ask.
What promise could be so strong that she had to hide absolutely everything from her? Even her name was a secret for so long, however Laura Lee knew it wasn't her place to pry. Lotte saw the change in her and started to walk around the bed.
“Soon I will tell you everything, and then you will think me harsh and probably very selfish, though love is always selfish; the more passionate the more selfish. I don't think you know how jealous I am of your life Laura Lee.” Lottie said while now carefully crawling up to Laura Lee from behind, resting her chin on her shoulder again.
Laura Lee wanted to tear herself away from her touch, still frustrated by herself, but she couldn't. “Lottie you’re talking nonsense again” she said quickly.
“I know I can be silly at times; for some reason you make me talk without stopping.” She giggled while saying the words, and Laura Lee couldn't help but to feel silly herself. She could listen to Lottie's soft laughs and giggles for hours at a time, it was sad she heard them so rarely.
Lottie shuffled in bed to sit more comfortably, leaning a bit closer to Laura Lee while her chin continued to rest on her shoulder. Laura Lee could feel her cool breath hit the crook of her neck, and it sent a shiver through her body.
She could feel the blood-rush return to her cheeks, and she could see in her side-view that Lottie had a playful look in her eyes.
“Have you ever been to a ball Laura Lee?” she asked, and Laura Lee froze and slightly tensed by the sudden question. A bright memory from the special night came to mind and she had no idea how to process the amount of thoughts that were flooding her mind. .
“I- Yes…” she said, a slight stammer in her voice.
“What was it like? It must be amazing” Lottie asked, and Laura Lee slightly laughed seeing Lottie daydream off a ball, though it quickly disappeared, leaving her with sudden confusion and anxiety lingering in her chest. She was certain, incredibly certain that she was indeed at the ball.
She saw her, with her burgundy ballgown and- – she stopped herself.
“I’ve almost forgotten, it was a while ago”, she lightly said, lying to herself.
“You’re not that old. Your first ball can hardly be forgotten yet,” Lottie said with excitement in her voice.
“I remember everything about it – I-if I think hard enough” she quickly added, trying her best to keep up the white lie she just made. She cringed at her own sinfulness. This wasn't like her, to lie because she was afraid to tell the truth, she always told the truth.
“It was wonderful. The hall was great and there were couples of all shapes and colours dancing together to a beautiful waltz of violin and harpsichord. I’ve always enjoyed the music.” she sighed, remembering what her father had told her about the young girl living at the palace.
Lottie picked up the sudden change of atmosphere and reached for Laura Lee's hand in silent comfort. That was something Lottie only did, quietly reach out for Laura Lee when she felt like it. Laura Lee would be lying to herself if she said she didn't like it.
“It was hosted by the great Scatroccio family, though their daughter was just like me. She is locked behind walls and doesn't have a single friend in the world, I wish I could meet her.” a sadness filling her voice. She turned to face Lottie who was still resting her cheek on her shoulder.
“But now I have you, and I’m so happy I have someone to spend time with” she smiled, and Lottie smiled back, however Laura Lee quickly turned her head to face the dressing table, and the smile left her face.
“Though I saw something… I still don't know what it was or if it was real. She was beautiful, all of her, and her ey-” - I know it was you I saw
She stopped herself from saying anything more. She was unsure and didn't want to scare Lottie, even with her own weird behavior. She shook her head to get rid of the thought.
“Lets go to sleep now, it's late” Laura Lee sighed before carefully pulling away from Lottie's cool touch who somewhat looked sad from having to lean away from Laura Lee.
Laura Lee stood up from the bed and turned around, seeing Lottie sitting in the same position she just did. Her glittering eyes followed Laura Lee wherever she wandered in the room with a shy smile, just like she did.
“Goodnight Lottie” she softly said before heading out the door, waiting till she heard the doorlock click before she crept to her own room with a sensation of uncomfortableness lingering in her chest. She couldn't quite figure out why it was there, perhaps it was from their earlier conversation.
Laura Lee often wondered if their pretty guest ever said her prayers. She certainly had never seen her upon her knees. In the morning she never attended their prayers, neither during their family prayers. At night she never left the drawing-room for their brief evening prayers in the hall.
She remembered that Lottie had casually come out in one of their careless talks that she had been baptised, which Laura Lee should have doubted her being a Christian. Religion was a subject Laura Lee never had heard her speak a word off. If she had known better, this particular neglect or loathing would not have so much surprise on her.
Laura Lee had talked about her religion to Lottie several times, how it saved her when she was younger. She told about how she hit her head in a nearby lake during Sunday church, though she was lucky.
The incident left a small and lingering scar on her forehead, which wasn't visible unless she pointed it out. When she told Lottie about it, her expressions became incredibly lively.
Lottie had an almost identical scar on the exact same place as her, the middle of her forehead hidden behind her long bangs. Lotties scar was way more visible than hers, though she never commented on how Laura Lee believed god saved her that day.
Lottie was quite the alarmed and nervous person, she was cautious of her surroundings at all times, and Laura Lee found herself adopting a ‘few’ of her habits.
She started to lock her bedroom door, believing the same whimsical alarms like midnight invaders or prowling assassins. She also adopted Lotties brief search through her room, just in case someone could be hiding.
She did all these just in case before getting ready herself. Getting dressed in her nightgown and brushing her her. Laura Lee got to bed and fell asleep as she was exhausted from today's events.
A silent candlelight was burning in her room, a habit she still kept from when she was younger, and nothing could tempt her to let go of it.
Though Laura Lee had been able to take her rest in peace these nights, dreams still came through stone walls to lighten, or darken, the very room she was sleeping in. They make their exits and their entrances as they please, and laugh at locksmiths.
She dreamt that night, and it was the beginning of a very strange agony.
She couldn't call it a nightmare, since she felt quite conscious of being asleep, but she was equally conscious of being in her room. She was laying in her bed.
She saw, or fancied she saw, the room and the furniture just as she had seen it last, except it was very dark and she saw something move at the foot of her bed. She was now scared, as this reminded her of a dream she had had several years ago.
At first she couldn't quite figure out what it was, though she quickly saw it was a sooty-black animal that resembled a monstrous cat. It looked about four or five feet long, for it measured fully the length of the rug as it passed over it. It continued pacing back and forth like a sinister restlessness of a beast in a cage.
Laura Lee felt paralysed. She wanted to cry, scream, anything, but she was physically held back as she was terrified . She saw its pace grow faster, and the room rapidly became darker and darker, in the end so dark she could only see two glowing eyes staring at her.
The darkness consumed her, and there were no signs of the burning candle. She felt her heart pounding against its cage, wanting to run for its life. She didn't know if the darkness was real or if it was her own vision blurring.
She felt the bed spring lightly to the side, then the two broad eyes met her face. Suddenly she felt a stinging pain as if two large needles darted, an inch or two apart, deep into the crook of her neck, close to her shoulder.
She awoke in a petrified scream, soaked in cold sweat and tears flooding her eyes. She lifted herself from the bed, her breath was short and rapid. She saw the candle at her nightstand, burning through the night, lightening her room. Why was it lit? It was just gone..
She heard the slight creek of the wood board and rapidly turned her head with wide and scared eyes. To her surprise, she saw a female figure standing at the foot of her bed, a little at the right side. It was in a dark loose dress, and its hair covered her shoulders. A block of stone couldn't be more still.
There were no signs of breathing, as its chest laid flat. The figure slowly started to change its place, walking closer to the door, the floor creaking beneath; opening the door and passing through, then closing it after.
Laura Lee was relieved thinking the figure was Lottie. She slowed her breathing and tried her best to return to herself. It was Lottie, it had to be, no one else dared to enter her room at night unless it was her father or Adelaide.
She must have forgotten to lock her door. She tried getting out of bed, but her hands were trembling as the terrifying adrenaline in her body hadn't left. She stood up and felt dizzy and unsteady on her feet.
She stumbled to her door and placed a hand on the handle and turned it… it was locked …
Laura Lee’s heart sank and her head became hot, she froze in her place, horrified. She could not open the door, and she will not open the door to figure out what was lying, waiting for her, on the other side.
She didn't tear her eyes away from the door as she very slowly and carefully walked backwards to her bed. She stumbled when she reached the edge of her bed, though she held her breath, not daring to make a single sound.
She tried her best to move, still paralysed from the fear . She crawled up her bed and covered her head, hiding herself underneath all her covers and pressed Leonard deep against her chest as she folded her hands together and prayed .
She laid there until she was more dead than alive till morning.