Chapter Text
Not the first time she's felt this way.
Just the first time she's allowed herself to feel this way.
They've been on better terms lately, Bassie and Cocoa. Their relationship is still a little strained. Years of resentment can't vanish overnight. But they're getting somewhere.
Bassie was so used to feeling nothing but Envy when looking at Cocoa. It felt wrong to feel any other emotion at the sight of her. She still found that feeling lingering every now and then. Every once in a while, she would instinctively look at her with an expression of pure disdain, before remembering that Cocoa was undeserving of such treatment. Cocoa understood it meant nothing thankfully.
That feeling extended to Bassie's actions as well. She would find herself going out of her way to help Cocoa, to make her happy, only to backpedal, and vehemently deny that the gestures meant anything at all. If it were just small things, maybe Cocoa would believe the lies. But of course, it wasn't just small things.
Things like saving rare resources specifically for her, making an effort to hangout with her despite insisting she wasn't interested. Things that made blatantly obvious that Bassie did, in fact, care deeply about the bunny.
Injured, but ever the optimist, Cocoa stayed just outside the elevator, slowly generating a pile of bonbons, as she was known to do. Where was she getting them from? Well, let's not ask questions we can't handle the answer to. Bassie found herself back at the elevator, since she wasn't exactly skilled at the machines, and the floor was devoid of any valuables.
“Bassie! Care for a bonbon?” Cocoa extended a hand, offering Bassie one of her signature treats.
“I don't need-... maybe later. Anyway-” Bassie was dismissive, but she caught herself mid sentence. Bassie knelt down beside her, pulling out a medkit she never mentioned having.
“Oh, I'm good. I'm sure someone else needs that more than I do.” Cocoa tried to decline.
“Well their injuries aren't as severe, and I want you to have it. Give me your arm.” Cocoa listened. Bassie began to patch up her injuries.
“You've been doing this a lot lately.” Cocoa blurted out.
“What?”
“Looking out for me. Helpin’ me out. You're really trying to make an effort. I've noticed that. I appreciate it.”
“...I don’t know what you're talking about.”
Cocoa gave her a very non-convinced look.
“I'm just helping a friend. You're reading into it too much.”
“It's nice that you're doing all this for me, but why lie about it? Why not just be honest?”
“...Can I?”
“What do you mean? Why wouldn't you be able to?”
“I mean-, I want to, but-, it feels like I can't. Like I'm not allowed to.” Bassie slid against the wall, eventually sitting on the floor. Cocoa joined her.
“I'd gotten so used to wanting nothing to do with you that I just, it feels like I'm not… supposed to care about you. It feels like I'm breaking a rule.” Bassie dodged eye contact, looking guilty.
“Well, maybe if you stop trying to deny it, it'll come naturally? You're clearly making the effort to care, you're just struggling to admit that.”
“Well I… *sigh*
I've been doing little things to make up for lost time, make up for treating you so poorly. I like having you around, Cocoa. It's just-, not easy to admit that.”
Cocoa was quiet for a moment.
“Well, if it helps, you don't need to do all this to make up for anything. It's not like we'll be short on time together. Don't do it because you feel like you have to, do it because you want to.”
Bassie didn't have a response. But to Cocoa, her silence was a valid answer. Cocoa leaned onto Bassie's shoulder. Bassie didn't expect that, but she wasn't about to say no. Cocoa offered her the bonbon from earlier. This time, Bassie took it. Bassie's little gestures continued for the rest of the run. But she wasn't so quick to dismiss them this time.
Liking Cocoa platonically? Bassie had done that before. Even when she wanted nothing to do with her, she often reminisced on the time they were friends.
Liking her romantically, on the other hand? The thought had entered her mind a handful of times. And each time she would silence the thought. She couldn't like her. Not after everything Cocoa had taken from her. But now the thought had come back in full force. And it was terrifying, because this time she didn't doubt it.
Bassie laid in bed, staring at the ceiling. Normally she would've used her alone time to recharge after socializing far more than she was built to handle. But today she had something on her mind. Someone on her mind.
She had been telling herself what she is and isn't allowed to think. But this time, she tried not to. She allowed herself to consider the possibility. The possibility that maybe, she liked the person she had wasted years resenting. And it seemed pretty likely. When she stopped trying to hate her, it became so much easier to see all her best qualities. But she can't be certain just yet. She'll give it time, see how she feels tomorrow. She rolled over, and went to sleep, hoping the feeling would be gone when she woke up.
And then she woke up.
And the feeling persisted.
And she wasn't happy about that.
She was fine with the fact that she liked Cocoa. It was the fact she was only realizing it so many years later that bothered her. She could've shot her shot years ago, gotten it over with then. But instead, she was just figuring things out now. It felt a little embarrassing.
And the final nail in the coffin? She didn't even know if Cocoa would like her that way. Cocoa had every right to hate her. But she didn’t. She had every right to want nothing to do with her. She had every reason to not feel the same.
But Cocoa wasn't the type to hold a grudge. Despite everything, she was actively choosing to be close to her. So maybe, maybe there was a chance.
The duo sat in Cocoa's room. Cocoa was going on about something, but Bassie wasn't quite listening. Partway through the conversation, Bassie held Cocoa's hand. She thought Cocoa would've stopped talking to acknowledge that, but Cocoa just gave her hand a soft squeeze, and continued yapping.
“Cocoa.” Bassie got her attention. Cocoa tilted her head, waiting for her to continue.
Bassie reached out toward her face, stopping just before she made contact, giving Cocoa an opportunity to decline. When she didn't, Bassie laid her hand on Cocoa's cheek, dragging her thumb across it.
Bassie looked at her with an unreadable expression. Not Envy, not hate. Not a smile, not a frown. Something intimate.
“Did you know your nose looks like a heart?” Bassie pointed out the cute, but otherwise insignificant detail.
“You hadn't noticed?” Cocoa giggled.
“No, I hadn't.” Bassie stated. She brought her other hand to the other side of Cocoa's face.
“Yknow, all this time I've been looking at you, but I haven't been seeing you. I was seeing a problem, not a person. I never really took in all the little details. Never gave myself a chance to. Now I get to see all of them at once.”
“You're pretty.” Bassie spoke before she thought. Cocoa looked slightly surprised, not expecting the compliment. Bassie realized what she said.
“So are you.” Cocoa replied before Bassie could backpedal.
“...You really think so?”
“Always have.” Cocoa smiled.
Bassie had the urge to do something stupid. So she did. Bringing her face closer to Cocoa's, until their lips met. Cocoa didn't pull away, leaning into her as well. And from there, they did what felt natural. Bassie wrapped an arm around Cocoa, holding her head with the other one. Cocoa held onto Bassie's arm, and onto one of her handles.
Bassie was the first to pull away. The two of them sat there for a moment, holding onto each other, breathing heavily. Before Bassie could get a word in, Cocoa pulled her back in for round two. This time lasted even longer than the first, only stopping when they needed air.
“You taste like chocolate.” Bassie broke the silence, saying something stupid. Cocoa found that a lot funnier than it was. She pulled Bassie in for a hug.
“I dunno Bass, I'm pretty sure you meant something by this. Don't go telling me otherwise!” She was right. Bassie couldn't go telling Cocoa that she was “reading into it too much” or anything of the sort. Not this time. Though, Bassie wasn't planning on denying it.
“I did.” Bassie held her tighter. “Does this make us a thing?”
“Hehe, you have to ask? Of course it does.” Cocoa pulled back, bringing them face to face again. Bassie sighed, laying her head onto Cocoa's lap.
“Yknow the part I hate? We could've done this ages ago. If I hadn't let that stupid main thing get to my head, we could've been together this whole time.”
“Well, I could've asked you out during that time too. I certainly thought about it. Maybe then we would've gone through this whole thing sooner. So we're both foolish.” Cocoa's smile was infectious. Bassie couldn't help but grin.
“Well, I'm glad we got there in the end. I love you, Cocoa.”
“Love you too, Bass.”