Chapter Text
2D was hiding in the bathroom, hitting his head, and sobbing uncontrollably after Murdoc finally finished screaming at him.
All he did was watch the TV! He was just watching a show, curled up under a warm blanket, and Murdoc stormed into the room.
He just wanted to watch an episode of Gilmore Girls, for Christ's sake. Lorelai and Max just broke up, and he wanted to know what would happen next!
His simple desires didn't mean a thing to Murdoc, though, if anything, they may have even further enraged the man.
The last thing Murdoc said was what really got to him, "Take a knife and shove it into your chest, for all I care! I hope you do, actually!"
2D, in the years he had spent with Murdoc, had learned different ways to cope with the abuse, but being told to die always especially hurt, he wasn't sure why.
He supposed that suicide was just a really touchy subject for him, which was stupid, but he didn't want a shrink to analyze him.
He knew the guy was just mad, but it still hurt so badly to be told that. He wanted to leave and finally feel safe again.
It wasn't realistic. He'd never be safe, he knew that, he hated the fact so much, but what could he do about it? He was weak and uncoordinated- he could barely run.
2D had known that his nice streak would quickly come to an end, he just didn't think it would be bad enough to send him into a breakdown.
He couldn't hide away in his room again, either. Russel made him promise to come out at least once a day when there weren't awful circumstances.
He could text Rusell, he realized. Guy was great. He wouldn't be bothering him, right?
He took out his phone, trying to find his Messages app. He texted Russel, 'bathrrom. hilp pls its murdoc russel pls'.
2D didn't think to add any clarification or to correct his grammar, but he didn't do either of those things regularly.
The whole vision thing made it difficult.
The door open and 2D froze, covering his face with his arms before realizing it was just his friend. He was safe as safe could be. Russel sat down in front of him.
2D clung onto him, sobbing hysterically. Russel awkwardly pat his back, wondering why he had been more reliant lately.
2D shoved his face into Russel's shoulder, grabbing his hand instinctually. Russel had really warm hands, 2D's were cold.
"'m gonna die- I'm- gonna die- Russel- help-" Russel froze as 2D looked up at him with a look of absolute terror on his face.
"You're not gonna die, Dee. What makes you think that?" he asked, not knowing what else to say. 2D shook his head.
Aware of the man's mental health issues and some previous, serious events, Russel was really concerned, and he wasn't trying to hide it.
"I'm- I'm gonna kill myself- and- he'll finally leave me alone, yeah? I can't breathe- gonna- gonna die-" 2D explained, not thinking about his words.
"No, you're not. You're gonna be fine. You just need to breathe. You know how to breathe," 2D took a deep breath, then another one.
"See? I told you you could do it. Now take another one," 2D let out a sob instead, "That's the opposite of a deep breath, D."
"I can't-" he gripped the back of Russel's shirt tightly, feeling a need to hold onto something. He unintentionally scratched Russel's back.
"You took two just a few seconds ago, man, yes, you can," Russel guarranteed. 2D tried again, and he was right. He took a few more.
"What are you feeling, Dee? Now that you're a bit calmer?" Russel continued to rub his back, knowing he needed physical comfort.
"Not great... um... scared, like 'm still in danger and it- it hurts, really badly."
"What hurts?" 2D froze. He was too old for what he was talking about- he was in his thirties and still hadn't found a good coping mechanism.
"Nothin'," he tried. Russel crossed his arms, obviously not believing him, "Really, nothing, I'm just... still scared."
Russel grabbed his wrists tightly. His winces made Russel accidentally tighten his grip. He loosened it quickly once he realized what he was doing.
"Fuck, Sorry, Dee. Can I look at them? Take care of them and stuff," 2D nodded, looking away. It wasn't the first time 2D had self harmed, Russel knew.
Russel froze when he lifted the man's sleeves. He was used to seeing more grotesque injuries, but this was so real. His best friend.
Russel hugged 2D tightly for a moment before pressing a pad on it with pressure for a few moments, waiting for it to stop bleeding.
He, then, ignored 2D's whimper as he disinfected the cuts, contemplating if he needed stitches or not. He decided they didn't- they didn't seem to be too deep, which he was happy for.
Finally, Russel put a bandage on them and hugged 2D tightly, "I love you, man. Next time, call me before you do all this, okay?"
"Okay. I'm sorry, man, I didn't mean to bother you," 2D apologized, leaning against Russel, who groaned, grabbing the top of his head.
"You're not bothering me, man. I care about you, and your fucked up mind," 2D smiled. His mind really was fucked up, wasn't it?
He liked how Russel didn't think it was a bad thing, though. Well, obviously it wasn't a good thing, but he liked how Russel didn't treat him as if he was a bad person for it.
"Thanks, Russel. 'ppreciate it," 2D blushed. Why did he say that? "'Ppreciate it"? That was so weird to say in this situation.
"'course, buddy, now get out, the bathroom's gross. Let's go to my room," 2D followed Russel before laying down on the bed.
It was the most comfortable mattress ever, but Russel refused to say where he got it from, no matter what he was offered.