Chapter Text
Fun fact: almost all calico cats are female; male calico cats are astronomically rare.
This is because the orange/black pigment genes are located on the X chromosome.
Which means that females (XX) can carry different color alleles on each X chromosome.
And, because of genetic mosaicism, they display orange patches and black patches, hence the calico pattern.
In other words, since males are normally XY, only one pigment allele is expressed; it's usually either solid orange or solid black, not both.
"However," Sensei points to Diogenes, who has been soft-contained in his favorite disposable turkey pan stack.
"Rare male calicos appear when a male has an extra X chromosome; I'm talking about 1 in 3000 here."
"In that case, however, XXY male calicos usually have reproductive and hormonal issues."
"This leads to most male calicos being sterile or having health complications."
"BUUUUUUT!" He adds yet another plot twist and doubles down on the cat-pointing with the other hand.
"This little handsome fucker over there, somehow, by some astronomical miracle, doesn't seem to have those issues."
Diogenes yawns, and his clipped left ear flickers; a signature of a spayed cat.
"That guy was an employee of a cat cafe in D.U., and some animal research lab saw him when one of its members came to visit."
"Of course, the lab quickly requested to uhm, obtain the cat for researching purposes."
He throws his hands up. "And you know how a cat-lover and a cat cafe owner would react."
"Everything escalated and Kivotos-ed even quicker, if you know what I mean. "
"The cafe had to shut down due to explosives, and that animal research lab was fined to oblivion by the union."
"But most importantly, cats were scattered into the street during the gunfire exchange."
"Now, most of the kitties have been retrieved thanks to the local cooperation, all except one."
The members of the Abydos High School, taking shade in a ruin of train carts, glance at the sole outlier of the group.
"Mrrrrrrrrrw..." Letting out half a languid meow, Diogenes turns into a tri-color croissant as he switches posture.
"Then, the cafe owner - I should mention, an affiliate of mine - came to me a day ago. Wanted me to find the said missing cat."
"Said it hopped on a train to Abydos, according to the cameras at the station."
"And here we are." Sensei wraps up with a muted clap through his gloved hands. "Thanks for joining my TED Talk."
"Nn," Shiroko pets the calico with a smile. "You're rare pretty baby."
"Nn," Kuroko, sitting on the other side, gives him a butt scratch. "An astronomically and miraculously rare pretty baby."
"And this guy has the nerve to wander into the deserted area, huh..."
Says Serika as she takes another swig of her water bottle.
"Well, looks like his luck didn't end upon birth after all~"
Nonomi, with rolled sleeves, clears some more space by ripping broken passenger seats off their rusty mounts.
"I'll be there in 20 minutes or so~" Ayane's voice chirps into the comms.
Faint engine hums and road noises can be heard in the background as she floors the Humvee.
The plan is to have her pick up the adult and the cat, then they make a beeline for the cafe owner.
That, and she really wants to give the dusty furball one last farewell.
"U-heh..." Hoshino slumps into the closest living object next to her called Sensei.
In her short moment with the calico, she already knew; he's a trained cat, a cat used to being with people.
Plus the fact that she's never seen him among the local strays, it's not difficult to piece it together.
Chances are, Diogenes belonged to someone, and he's somehow wandered way too far from his home.
"Oh yeah," She nudges the adult inquisitively. "So what's his real name anyway~?"
"Don't know." The adult nudges back. "The owner never told me. Why don't we ask when they're here?"
"Nn. Diogenes sounds cooler." "Nn. The name Diogenes will live in our hearts."
The wolves petting the cat stand by their initial naming idea.
"Mmm-eoooooow..." Diogenes agrees with a meow uttered a beat faster than he opens his mouth.
"Tell that to the owner," Serika drawls. "I'm sure they'll be open about it..."
"U-he~ Serika-chan is being territorial again~"
"WHAT!? WhatdoyoumeanTERRITORIAL!?"
Bzzz- Bzz-bzz!
Among the bantering, a muted vibration buzzes out from Sensei's phone.
At first, he thought it was the pickup finally arriving.
Or it was Ayane asking for a more specific location, since every part of the train graveyard looks almost the same.
This means you're staying, right?
"......" He looks at the text, looks at the Momotalk user ID, looks at the text again, and looks at the sender beside him.
Still talking and laughing as if nothing is happening, with one hand - presumably with her phone - sneaking behind her back.
How can you still type like this? Sensei can't help but think with a baffled smile.
Hoshino ignores his gaze, and jabs his kidney with the corner of his phone. Answer!
"Sensei?" Nonomi is the first to notice his slightly off expression.
Feeling five pairs of eyes locking onto him, Auburn can feel one of his eyelids jump before he makes a deliberate attempt to straighten his face.
"It's nothing," He explains. "Some extra work came in. But-"
He interrupts himself by elbowing the pink-haired shorty, who just jabbed him again.
"-But I've still got time for the rest of this evening."
"So, cough!... What about uh, we deliver the cat, and have some food in D.U. for dinner?"
"Dinner?" Shiroko's eyes beam up.
"Meat?" Kuroko's eyes beam up.
"Oh, here we go..." Serika gloats.
"Great~♧" Nonomi smiles, but Sensei's instinct tells him it's because of something else.
"Anything to spend a bit more time with Sensei! Right, Hoshino-senpai~?"
"Pffffffffft-" "U-he!? Why me!?"
With his mocking noises, Auburn's silver eyes shoot a knowing look at Nonomer's smirking emerald gaze.
"You can have her when we're done," He nudges the pink shorty again.
"I had plenty of her for the last two days. I'll be drained like a munny if I take some more."
"Auburn!?"
"Nn. We will save Sensei from the drainage."
"Nn. We can have a piece of Hoshino-senpai, too."
"Shiroko-chan... s!?"
"That's right! Hoshino-senpai has been waaaaay too clingy!"
"Serika-chan too!?"
And suddenly, attacks (?) are coming from both sides, putting the senior in a spot.
With a flustered Hoshino, the peaceful chat continues for several more minutes, mainly about her and the adult.
Except this time, the said adult is on their side instead. Amusedly, even.
The rest of the evening proceeds as their plan.
And seizing the opportunity, the adult asked the million-dollar question on behalf of all the cat's temporary caretakers.
Turns out, his name is actually Diogenes, it's just that the name is too... special so that most customers don't call him that.
The owner said in text messages that they gave him that name because, surprise-surprise, they found him in a clay pot by the street.
It seems like when Diogenes was lost in Abydos, he defaulted to the method that got him rescued once before.
No wonder he only reacted to Shirokos. Sensei muses with pursed lips.
After seeing off the Abydos girls, he's finally left to his own devices in his MRZR Alpha 2.
Shirokos are fed with steaks, Serika got a requisition for a part-time job in the steakhouse.
Nonomi took a bunch of pictures, Ayane got to join the fun with everyone.
And Sensei got his wallet wrung dry. A small price to pay, he gaslights himself, seeing the number that's anything but.
you're not mad
are you
?
BigBadAub02 sent an emoji.
You have an hour.
BarnacleBonker0102 sent an image.
Otherwise you'll be this tonight.
If you can make it through.
"Well shit." With a sigh, he tucks his phone away, buckles up and turns the ignition.
Next stop? Probably a detour returning to Schale first.
Spare clothes, extra magazines (not that he'll need it), some snacks... and maybe some zinc tabs.
Then, it's going to be another long night with a long fight back in Abydos, minus the sand.
Regardless, Auburn Sensei smiles again.
Another job well done.