Chapter Text
It is nearing daybreak, and both Stan and Heff have their sleigh stuffed to the brim with oversized bags of their ill-gotten haul. The residents are due to wake up at any given minute now.
"It was near daybreak,
And so far, not a single animal is awake.
Before anyone could arise,
They had to make their escape,
With all their ill-gotten gains
Of every different size, color and shape."
Stan got out his whip and hit Francisco with it, making him yelp as he started pulling away from that part of the woods like the wind, to the point of burrowing deep in the snow to the point of only his antler being visible in the snow. Of course, Francisco kept pulling the sled and villains out of the area.
Realizing that they were barely getting anywhere, Stan pushed Heff out of the sled and made him co-pull the sleigh as well. Eventually, the sleigh stopped near a gorge distanced from the homes. The woozle then hopped off the sled, dancing around with victory. He's stolen everything his enemies loved, including the honey, and now THEY'LL be the ones suffering in defeat.
The narrator said, "Whilst stopping near a gorge,
Stan felt as his victory was to finally dawn."
Stan said slyly to his sidekicks, "Just imagine their reaction, boys,
when they find out all their stuff is gone.
They're getting up now, those pathetic jerks.
First, they'll be stunned, and then, cue the waterworks."
-
Back in the Hundred Acre Woods, all the animals all awoke to find their food, decorations and presents all had been stolen. They all ran out of their houses, with most in their pajamas, shouting and panicking like mad.
The narrator then continued,
"In the woods, though no waterworks were triggered as Stan had thought,
Everyone woke up, panicking in alarm, devastation and distraught!
Tigger cried..."
"We was robbed!" Tigger panicked.
"With Kanga inquiring,"
"Who would steal from us without any respect?" Kanga asked.
"Then Rabbit concluded abruptly,"
"It must be the Pack Rats who are the prime suspect...s!" Rabbit declared to everyone, suspecting the Pack Rats, the rat trio who have taken stuff from the animals in the past, were the culprits. "Well, I was close to the rhyme."
"Owl interjected,"
"No, Rabbit, it can't be, they always leave a walnut in the stolen object's place. Whoever stole our belongings have not left a trace," explained Owl. Yes, Stan was even smart enough to brush out sleigh tracks from the snow as they left the house.
The Pack Rats then hopped up and down, chattering in panic as the narrator said,
"Yes, the Pack Rats explained
That they were robbed of their treasure, their walnuts.
They were not the thieves this time,
No questions, ifs, ands, or buts.
They all felt miserable from losing everything,
From their gifts to their wreaths,
And they could not find the trail
Connected to the thieves."
The down-heartened animals hung their heads and began to head into their respective homes, ready to face a disappointing Christmas.
As Roo then hopped aboard a mound of snow, the narrator continued, "Then little Roo spoke up..."
Roo spoke to everyone, "Now wait, everyone, maybe we don't need those things
To remind us of all the heartfelt goodness
That the Christmas season brings.
After all, Christmas isn't about the fun gifts and treats
Or lights we hang up year after year,
It's about spending time with our friends and families,
Everyone we hold dear."
All the animals were moved by Roo's speech. They had briefly forgotten what Christmas was REALLY about, but what Roo had just established reminded them. They all had warm smiles, and Tigger was so touched by the words from his little hopping buddy, he wiped away a tear.
"And when hearing the little Roo's moving speech,
Tigger wiped away a little tear."
-
Where the thieves were, Stan awaited to hear the sound of sadness to travel all the way to where they were.
"Meanwhile, Stan and Heff stood there, awaiting to hear
The sounds of their victims' devastated tears.
Then they did hear a floating from the distance,
And the sound of sadness he hoped for was nonexistent."
Stan and Heff were confused to hear the sounds of singing. In the woods, the animals were standing together, holding paws and singing a reprise of "Christmas Comes Tomorrow".
"They had heard a sound of joyful singing, and not one of the animals cried or wailed.
It seems as though the two foes' mission for revenge has ultimately failed.
Every animal friend whom Pooh Bear knew, the tall and the small,
Were singing, without any presents at all."
Stan stood in the snow with anger. How could this be happening? He and Heff stole their honey and Christmas items and they're still happy! How is that possible?
"How could this happen?" Stan asked in disbelief.
"The flabbergasted woozle asked in disbelief."
"I thought for sure once we'd steal their stuff,
They'd be sad and we'd be even and in relief."
Then Heff winced, getting a weird feeling in his brain. It's as if the dumb heffalump was receiving an epiphany.
"Then a strange feeling was felt inside Heff's brain,
It seemed he was thinking, miraculously again.
And with Heff,
Well in the Hundred Acre Woods, they say..."
We then see an X-ray appear over where Heff's brain was, and it had a hole in it, but we see it shrinking, as the narrator continued, "That the hole in his head shrank three sizes that Christmas day.
Then he said to his colleague..."
The x-ray disappeared as Heff spoke to Stan, "Duh, Stan, I know you seem sore,
But I just thought of something
That I hadn't thought before."
"You remembered your own name?" Stan asked dryly.
"No, it's maybe that Christmas isn't about honey and lights galore
But maybe Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more."
Francisco, warmed by what Heff said, had a warm smile grown across his face. Stan, however, was not moved by Heff's words.
The narrator said, "But the woozle objected..."
"Well you can keep that mushy family crud, you hapless fat elf!
I've waited too long for the honey,
And I'll enjoy it even if I have to myself!"
Then Stan started to grab the sled and pull it away from the area, when one gift fell out of one of the sacks, to Stan's notice. It seemed rather bulky-looking and round, and it had a card attached to it.
The narrator then explained,
"Then a gift fell out from the sacks,
One wrapped, bulky and round.
The woozle crept up to the wrapped object,
And he especially found
A little message attached to the front.
Although Stan thought this was absurd,
He picked up the gift's note and had read it,
Read the whole note, word for word."
Stan picked up the note and started reading its words,
"To Stan Woozle, who may seem like a crook
And one of the crummiest thieves in the book.
However, some of us feel he's just misunderstood,
And hopefully that this present will do him good.
I hope that this will lead him and Heff down the right way,
And that they shall have a rather pleasant holiday."
"And the woozle was even surprised further to see what was at the card's end."
"Merry Christmas from Winnie the Pooh and his friends."
Stan began to feel touched that inspite of the trouble the two gave Pooh and his friends in the past, the good animals would give him a Christmas present. So he unwrapped it and the present turned out to be a honey pot.
"He was surprised at one of the gifts he had taken was to him from them,
And also at the fact that it was his most long-coveted and craved item.
It was a honey pot, and as reaction, the woozle began to employ
Some new tender feelings as that of a touched youthful boy."
Stan had a new warm feeling inside him he's never had before, and something else rare has happened: he started to smile warmly, and tears of joy began to fill in the bottoms of his eyes.
"He even began to process tears of joy," the narrator concluded.
However, the moment was interrupted when the sled began to drift off the edge, about to plummet into the gorge below. Stan, Heff and Francisco quickly noticed, gasping in alarm as Stan put his honey pot down and they rushed to the sled's back, trying to pull it back and stop it from falling. The trio's feet dragged as they struggled to keep it from falling.
"Unnnnggghhh!" the trio moaned, straining from pulling the heavy-weighted sleigh.
"Then, with the true Christmas spirit still in their minds,
Stan and Heff soon adopted the strength of ten heffalumps and woozles combined!"
Yes, thanks to their newfound Christmas spirit, Stan and Heff were able to gain strength enough to hold the sled above themselves with Francisco holding on as well. They actually saved the Christmas stuff and honey before it was too late!
-
Now it's time to return the stolen goods. The sled began to slide all the way back to where Pooh and his friends live, with Heff playing his nose joyfully like a trumpet.
"And so the two whizzed with their load through the bright morning light,
Finally with their spirits so high and bright!"
They arrived back to where Pooh and his friends were, with some animals moving out of the way for the sled to slide to a complete stop. Stan and Heff smiled as they and Francisco gave back the decorations, presents, food and honey they stolen to everyone.
As this happened, the narrator said, "When returning to the animals, they brought back the honey
To Pooh Bear, Kanga, Roo, Owl, Gopher, and even the bunny.
They also brought back the toys, trinkets, trappings, and figurines.
Brought back their wreaths, stockings, doilies, and trees.
After explaining all that happened, the two had apologized for the deeds,
And Pooh Bear and his friends forgave and let them join, in deed.
The two even brought back the food, mostly the ones for the feast."
Later, the two passed out stocking stuffer treats to everyone around, including Francisco.
"And they, themselves, Stan and Heff, passed out the best treats.
Christmas time is here now
You feel it in the air
With friends, and songs, and families, and laughter everywhere
It's Christmas time
A special time, a mystifying time
A satisfying time
An absolutely positively electrifying time
Christmas time is finally here"
As Stan and Heff kept passing out treats, the camera moves back all the way to outside, and even pulls back far enough to give a whole view of the Hundred Acre Woods with snowflakes falling as the holiday continued.
The End
"In Memory of Chuck McCann (1934-2018)"