Chapter Text
From the Diary of John Kramer
March 2nd, 2003
They do not know that I know them yet, or even who I am, but I have chosen three precious, quarreling souls to undergo a great and transformative event. The experiences they are bound to endure can change their lives for their ultimate good. However, they must choose it. Whether they decide to reject or accept what lays before them rests squarely on their shoulders. I place my trust in them.
My time left on this earth is winding down, and I have done everything in my power to make every second last. That said, I am troubled by those who grapple with the time they have been given as if they wish it were less, or somehow easier to endure. In my own tests of life, it has been made apparent to me that ‘easy’ truly is the furthest thing from simple. An easy life is so complex, and so rare a thing to find, that we may as well not wish for it at all.
It was in my dreams I first saw them — my flock of three, which I will do everything in my power to shepherd into the realization that they have been blessed with a life that deserves to be lived to its fullest.
The first, Adam.
Adam has been, since birth, struggling to make his place in this world. He feels he is missing something from his life. It stems from the separation he endured in his younger years from his twin brother, David. Ripped from each other as they bounced between foster home and foster home, they have not seen each other since they were three. Except for once, in a three-day stint when they both ran away from their respective adoptive families at age fourteen. He has been searching for something ever since — anything to fill the hole that David's absence left. All of the money the Faulkner-Stanheights have could not please nor return him to wholeness. No amount of pictures he takes will freeze within his memory the moments he shared with the brother he feels slipping away from him more and more, each and every day.
The second, my dearest Amanda.
The brilliant Miss Young has felt dependent on objects and individuals since she learned to think for herself. Rather, it would be appropriate to say that due to her codependency, she never did, truly, learn to think for herself at all. She has clung, time and time again, to whomever she feels is least likely to abandon her. Her parents. Her highschool ‘bff.' Heroin, coke, meth. Her dodgy ex-boyfriend. And most recently, she has fastened herself to Mark. Despite the fact that everything and everyone she has ever clung to has chewed her up and then spit her out again, she has hope that perhaps this time she has found someone who needs her as much as she needs him.
On the topic of Mark —
Mark Hoffman could truly become something great, but he exhibits a lack of trust. He feels the need to control all situations, and at all times. It is because of his failure to protect his sister when she needed him the most. Her death was the one situation he could not have foreseen nor controlled. When he took Amanda beneath his wing, he was able to force his hand with her. She craved his control, his guidance on her journey to becoming sober. It worked. Since then, being her lifeline — even if only through control — is the one thing that has kept his guilt over his sister's death at bay enough not to drive him mad.
I can't claim to know in what specific ways my final wishes will impact them. Neither as a group, nor as individuals. I just know, in a broader manner of speaking, that it will.
I can feel it.
I hope they are ready for whatever comes. I am trusting it to propagate wholeness, independence, and trust inside of them.
John Kramer