Chapter Text
A few days later, Jae invited Beomseok over. They went into their room and sat on their bed, and they took their boyfriend's hands in theirs, rubbing their thumbs over his skin as they took in a deep breath.
"What if I told you.. that I'm not going to be entirely masculine all the time?"
"Entirely?" Beomseok asked, tilting his head a little. He didn't look upset, which was a relief. He just looked.. open. Open to listen.
That was good enough for now. It made Jae feel more confident in their words.
"I-I know you've seen me with makeup and stuff," They continued with less hesitation. "And this is kind of difficult to explain, but.. I'm not really a man. I mean- sometimes I am, but it depends.. o-on the day. I'll wake up and not want to be a man, and I might be a woman, or something else entirely."
Beomseok's eyebrows rose a little. "Ohhh.." He mused. "You mean like- being genderfluid?"
Jae paused. He'd always identified as some kind of androgynous.. but he'd never considered that.
"Well.. I'm not always a guy- I-I know that. Sometimes I like being a pretty girl, and other times I like being androgynous to the point where it confuses people.. So yeah, something like that."
".. You seem worried." Beom said, brow furrowing in concern as he scooted closer to Jae, who let go of his hands to hug themselves.
"I have been kind of worried." They admitted. "I've-.. been kind of stressed over how to tell you this, a-and how exactly to say everything that's in my mind. I had a whole mini-breakdown over my outfits and the way you perceive me depending on what I wear."
They sighed shakily, and Beomseok was quiet for a moment.. then his eyes widened in realization. ".. Is this why you looked in uncomfortable that day I complimented your outfit?"
".. I was scared you wouldn't like that side of me."
"Are you kidding? I lo-.. I mean, it's you." Beomseok said genuinely, "Why wouldn't I like you?"
Jae stared at him for a few moments, shocked into rare silence.
".. me?"
Beom nodded earnestly. "It doesn't matter what you look like, or how you decide to present yourself.. you're always beautiful to me because you never stop being you. And I mean- well-" He stumbled over his words a little. "I-I adore you, you're amazing."
Jae couldn't control their smile if they tried, "Awww.. that's-.. you're so sweet." They said. "You really don't mind not having a boyfriend sometimes?"
Beomseok nodded again, his own sweet smile appearing. "I'm happy as long as I'm with you, regardless of gender."
Jae let out a sigh of relief, all tension leaving their shoulders as they started to ramble. "hOH- thank gods! That was terrifying- but also you're literally the sweetest man ever and I'm so glad you're my boyfriend, I don't know what I would've done if this had gone badly, I figured you'd be cool with it but I wasn't sure but you are cool with it so now-"
"Heyheyhey-!" Beomseok reeled them back in, resting a hand on their leg. "Everything's okay, you're okay."
Jae inhaled sharply, then exhaled, placing a hand on their chest to try and get their rapidly beating heart under control. "Right, everything's fine.. We're fine."
They pulled each other in for a hug, and Jae smiled into Beom's shoulder as he rested his chin on their head.
"More than fine."
one week later.
"I have to tell you something."
Daeun's brow furrowed, now fully paying attention after hearing the tone in Jae's voice.
"Is everything okay?" He asked seriously, and Jae nodded.
"Yeah, actually.. more than okay." They replied, taking a deep breath.
"I think-.. I'm genderfluid. I-I know I am."
Daeun stared at Jae. Jae stared at Daeun.
"Oh, cool. For a moment there I thought something was wrong and I'd have to kill someone."
Jae blinked. Then, their expression melted into a relieved and grateful smile.
"Awwwww! You do love me back!"
"wH- Of course I do!" Daeun barked incredulously. "Has the hair dye finally seeped into your brain? Who do you think I am, not your best friend of forever?"
"I just-.." Jae came over to sit on the couch beside him. "It makes me really happy when you say it."
Daeun scowled. "Then I'll say it again, and you'd better listen cause this is the one time I will say it: I love you, and I will always love you, no matter what. Got it?"
Jae nodded, happy tears stinging at their eyes. "Y-Yeah! I got it!" They said between sniffles, and Daeun pulled him into a tight hug. Jae buried his face in his friend's shoulder, holding on like he'd disappear if they let go.
"I'm happy for you, by the way."
"I know.. thank you."