Chapter Text
I know exactly what I want and who I want to be
I know exactly why I walk and talk like a machine
I'm now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy
Oh! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh!
One track mind, one track heart
If I fail, I'll fall apart
Maybe it is all a test
'Cause, I feel like I'm the worst
So, I always act like I'm the best
If you are not very careful
Your possessions will possess you
TV taught me how to feel
Now real life has no appeal
It has no appeal, it has no appeal
It has no appeal, it has no appeal
It has no appeal
I know exactly what I want and who I want to be
I know exactly why I walk and talk like a machine
I'm now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy
Oh! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh!
MARINA - OH NO!
---
Sonic had always hated worrying people.
Not because he didn’t care, but precisely because he cared too much.
Ever since he could remember, he was the one who arrived first, fixed everything quickly, and ran off before anyone had time to ask if he was okay. It was easier that way. Lighter. The hero didn’t need help. The hero couldn’t be a problem. The hero was the one who helped, not the one who needed help.
So when the pain returned that morning, subtle like an insistent whisper, he did what he always did.
Ignored it. Pretended it didn’t exist. Treated it as something normal, not something that had been bothering him for days.
After all, heroes got hurt all the time. Scrapes, falls, impacts, sleepless nights. All of that was part of it. Nothing a bit of rest couldn’t fix. Nothing that justified worried looks, too many questions, or that uncomfortable pause when someone decided he needed to be taken care of.
And Sonic didn’t want that.
He got out of bed with an already practiced smile on his face, the same as always. Bright. Easy. Convincing. His leg stiffened for a moment, a warning. Even as his body protested in silence, even as each step carried a strange weight, he refused to give it a name.
Because giving it a name made it real.
And if it was real… then it wasn’t “nothing”.
-----S&A----
Tails had sent him to sleep not long ago, and when he glanced at the clock, it was already afternoon. He hadn’t managed to sleep much. He had just stared at the ceiling, thinking about how everything had changed so suddenly.
It didn’t matter.
He would try to convince Tails that it was just a small pain, that he had gotten hurt while running, anything.
It had to work.
When he went to the kitchen to eat something, he noticed a note from Tails on the table.
Oh, right. Today was one of the days his brother went out.
“I made mac and cheese, it’s in the fridge. Eat it and DO NOT run.” The note was written in Tails' skillful handwriting, even if it was a little messy from the rush.
Sonic just huffed in annoyance at his brother’s concern. Who was the older one here, huh?
He opened the fridge and found the container. It was full of food, smelled good, and Sonic was definitely starving, so he ate everything.
When he finished, he washed the dishes while thinking about Tails’ little note. He looked at his leg, now normal and without pain, and thought that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to run.
I mean, maybe it was just soreness from running too much, sometimes without breaks. Just that. Nothing else.
Wouldn’t exercising be good?
When he finished washing the dishes, he looked at the front door.
Somehow, it seemed to be calling him to open it and run. Running was something he always did after waking up, so what harm would there be?
He slipped on his shoes quickly, ready to feel that familiar adrenaline rush that came with running.
Sonic held the doorknob for a moment.
Before he could open the door and dash out, three firm knocks echoed through the house.
He froze in place.
Too many knocks to be Tails. Too light to be Knuckles. Either way, he didn’t want it to be anyone. But it was.
“Sonic?” a female voice sounded from the other side, far too familiar.
Of course.
Amy. The hedgehog he had known since childhood, her kindness and desire to help others persistent. Almost as persistent as Sonic’s.
He opened the door reluctantly, fighting the scowl forming on his face.
“Ah… Hi, Amy!” he greeted, trying to put on his usual smile.
“Tails told me to stay with you,” she replied while analyzing the speedster. “Were you going out?”
“Oh, no! Of course not!” Sonic tried to play it off and stepped aside to let Amy in, cursing himself internally.
Clearly Tails was going to send someone to stay with him, as if he were some kind of child.
He was fine. This pain was nothing.
Amy stepped inside. She didn’t seem to observe anything in the house, she already knew the place. Her gaze was fixed on Sonic, or rather, on his leg.
“This thing with your leg… is it recent?” she asked, her green eyes looking at him. She didn’t seem angry, just worried about him.
Sonic didn’t need other people’s concern.
“Dude, it’s just a pain. Why is everyone suddenly making a big deal out of it today?” he answered defensively, while looking away. He didn’t understand why it had suddenly become so important.
Amy stayed silent for a few seconds. Her heart hurt a little because she really was worried. Sonic had never been the type to stop and rest, she knew him too well. That’s why she wanted to help him.
But she realized that if she insisted, it wouldn’t lead anywhere. “If you say so.” She sat down on the couch, her face forming a warm smile, as if she were forgetting the uncomfortable conversation.
But she hadn’t forgotten. It just wasn’t the moment.
“Yeah.” Sonic let out a sigh of relief as he sat beside her.
Until an idea popped into his head.
The hero suddenly stood up, making Amy flinch at the abrupt movement. She looked at him with a what-the-heck-are-you-doing expression.
“Oh, Ames,” he faked a sleepy yawn. Actually, it wouldn't even have been a fake yawn. He hadn't been able to sleep anyway. “I think I’m really tired!”
“Tails told me you went to sleep in the morning,” she narrowed her eyes. “And judging by your messy fur, you woke up recently,” she pointed out.
Damn it, Sonic should have fixed his fur. He tossed and turned in bed so much and felt lazy when he looked in the mirror; he totally regretted it now. He felt nervous under Amy’s gaze. But he couldn’t falter now.
“The thing is, I really need to rest,” he said. “You know, sometimes you wake up and suddenly feel like sleeping again.” The speedster smiled, a crooked smile that made Amy’s heart flutter.
Well, wouldn’t him sleeping be a good thing, after all?
“…Alright.” Amy agreed after a few seconds of silence, and Sonic gave a bright smile before heading upstairs to his room.
Amy decided to prepare some chamomile tea while thinking everything over. She chose not to comment, but she had noticed how one of his legs was strangely swollen. She noticed how uncomfortable he was and realized that he just needed some time alone.
Maybe a tea would calm his nerves.
When she finished the tea, she went upstairs. She hummed to herself while thinking about how she would convince Sonic to drink it, since that drink wasn’t really his favorite. He was more inclined toward sugary drinks, like soda or energy drinks.
While wandering through her thoughts, Amy opened the door only to notice that Sonic wasn’t there.
The tray with the tea fell dramatically when she realized the window was open.
----S----
Sonic felt a little guilty as he ran away.
He knew Amy had had a crush on him for a long time, how could he just use that like a jerk?
He felt so stupid in that moment.
What calmed him was the wind in his cobalt blue fur. Running helped him calm down from all the pressure of the past few weeks.
The sharp pain in his leg reminded him of the reason for all of this. That damn pain. It was like something insistent, constantly reminding him of its presence.
Time lost its meaning as he ran. Minutes turned into hours without Sonic realizing it, his body running on autopilot, driven more by stubbornness than by real energy. The pain came in waves, sometimes stronger, sometimes almost nonexistent, and he clung to those brief moments of relief as proof that everything was fine.
Whenever the discomfort threatened to grow too much, he sped up even more, as if he could leave it behind with his speed. He didn’t stop to drink water. He didn’t stop to breathe properly. Stopping would mean listening to his own body, and that was the last thing he was willing to do.
As if running would solve it, like it always had before.
When he finally slowed down, the day was no longer the same. The light had changed without him noticing, lower, warmer, stretching long shadows across the field.
The air felt heavier now, loaded with a fatigue Sonic didn’t remember accumulating, and only then did he realize how much time had passed running nonstop, pushing limits he pretended didn’t exist.
He stopped in the field where he and Shadow usually finished their races. He hadn’t intended to go there, he just did.
It was around 3:00 p.m. at least. It was such a beautiful afternoon, the colors were brighter than ever.
For a moment, that view made him forget everything.
Forget that he was a hero. Forget that he had run away because he felt, somehow, pressured by the people he cared about so much. It made him forget the exhaustion. It made him think he was just an ordinary hedgehog enjoying the sunset.
A calm smile crossed his face as he enjoyed the breeze. He wanted Shadow here, he didn’t know why.
Maybe because he thought the agent wouldn’t ask unnecessary questions, would just listen. Would let him ramble or speak in short words.
“Shadow…” He let his mind wander as he ran his gloved hands through the grass.
He didn’t know how long he stayed there. The hours didn’t seem to pass in that place, it didn’t matter whether he was alone or accompanied by a certain hedgehog…
But he appreciated the calm of the moment. Especially being where he liked most, outdoors. Such a good feeling warmed his chest.
A sudden movement made his quills bristle in alert. Someone was approaching.
He stood up and froze, in a defensive stance, facing the source of the noise. But his expression softened when he realized it was Shadow.
“Why are you putting your weight on one side only?” Shadow emerged from the shadows.
Surprised by the sudden question, Sonic just blinked. “…What?”
“You’re acting strange,” Shadow replied flatly as he observed the hero.
“I’m not acting strange.” Sonic felt himself getting angry all of a sudden. The one person he thought wouldn’t ask questions was doing exactly that now.
“You are, and it’s obvious. What’s going on with you?”
“Why do you even care in the first place?!” Sonic snapped, not answering the first question and looking away.
Shadow didn’t reply, he just stared at him. He didn’t have an answer to that.
“I’ve been hurt plenty of times before. This is nothing.” Sonic emphasized the word as he turned to leave, without looking back.
A sharp, stronger pain shot through his leg as he ran back home, just to remind him of the reason for all of this again.
He almost tripped over a branch while running, making him growl as small tears of frustration gathered.
Why did nobody believe him?
As the wind brushed against his face, he stopped near a billboard. An advertisement he had placed months earlier, before all this happened.
That easy smile stared back at him now, almost mocking his current situation.
He stared at the billboard, someone he had been not long ago and who now seemed very different.
Couldn't he be like that perfect image of himself? The one where everything was perfect?
He would never be like that shiny photo of himself. He felt like he was looking in a mirror, but that was a reflection of who he once was.
When he got home, it was as if all the exhaustion of the day fell onto his shoulders. His eyes were heavy, and his head throbbed from crying so much on the way. He hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast, his stomach growled.
He felt so exhausted.
The pain had eased a little after he stumbled, but now it had returned a bit stronger. Like something pounding inside his leg. Something he wanted to stop, a constant discomfort.
He just stared at the front door. The sensible thing would be to go in through the window, where he had left, but he didn’t have the strength for that now.
He slowly opened the door, his head starting to spin.
“Sonic…!” He heard voices, probably Amy or Tails calling him. A persistent ringing suddenly filled his ears. The exhaustion, the hunger, and the headache hit him all at once.
For a moment, before everything faded, Sonic tried to laugh.
Not out loud. Just inside his head.
It was almost automatic, an old reflex.
'Of course this would happen to me', he thought. 'It always does, at the worst moment.'
He wanted to apologize. He didn’t know exactly to whom. Maybe to Amy. Maybe to Tails. Maybe to Shadow, for running off like a coward. Maybe to himself, for believing once again that he could just ignore it.
The hero wasn’t supposed to fall like this.
Wasn’t supposed to fail this way.
Wasn’t supposed to need someone to hold him up.
The idea of being a burden to someone tightened his chest more than the pain in his leg ever had.
'Just… a little longer', he thought, trying to convince himself. 'I just need to hold on a little longer.'
'I can always endure more.'
But his body was no longer listening.
His vision started to blur at the edges. He could hear, through the ringing, his name being called several times as footsteps approached and a hand touched his shoulder.
Sonic felt his body give in to the exhaustion and collapse.