Chapter Text
Pushed around and kicked around, always a lonely boy
You were the one that they’d talk about
Around town, as they put you down
And as hard as they would try, they’d hurt to make you cry
But you never cried to them, just to your soul
Run way, turn away, run away
31st of October, 1989.
Mike wakes up late that morning, he only has an 11:30 lecture so he lets himself sleep until 10. Although that doesn’t even help that much, it took him three hours to manage to fall asleep last night and he keeps having nightmares about those fucking monsters. Not even when they’re all dead he manages to get away from them. It used to happen to him a lot back when everything was more fresh, but these past few months, he’s been getting them again. Maybe it’s all because of the same reason that is keeping him from properly concentrating.
Well, nothing can be done about that now, so Mike gets up and puts on some half decent clothes. A sweater, jeans and sneakers. His hair is a mess after he wakes up. During summer he had been styling his bangs to the side, but looking back to those graduation pictures it doesn’t look as good as he thought. So he just shuffles it a bit and keeps the bangs forward. He takes a last look in the mirror.
On the reflection he sees Will’s polaroid above his bed. That tight feeling in his chest again. This is the longest he has gone without knowing anything about him since forever, since the day they met. Sure, when he was in California they didn’t see each other but he still knew about him from El’s letters and from when he managed to call without Mrs. Byers holding the phone hostage. But this time, Mike knows absolutely nothing about him. He guesses he could look for him, but going all around the campus looking for him all of a sudden seems… weird and obsessive. Plus, if he hasn’t seen him yet it must be for a reason, right? It’s just… It’s been so…
Lonely.
He feels five years old again, walking around kindergarten alone. Except this time he's not alone, he knows he has friends, back in Hawkins. But it feels like the loneliness just swallows him, and he can’t help but feel like nobody is there. Even if he knows that Will is close to him. But what if he’s forgotten all about Mike? What if he’s happy and surrounded by people who make him even happier? What if he doesn’t need him anymore? There’s no Mind Flayer to fight or Vecna to kill, so why would he? What if he’s found another? What if he has a-
His eyes meet their own reflection in the mirror. This is stupid. It’s probably the sleep deprivation talking. And he really needs to eat something. Mike takes his jacket and without a second thought, leaves his room towards the cafeteria.
⇟
Will woke up this morning in a rush, trying to get to his first lecture on time. He had stayed up working on that gothic arts paper and barely got a few hours of sleep. Still it was worth it, he had managed to finish it and now, he can have the whole afternoon and night for himself, a bit of Halloween fun.
The lecture was good, he got an A on an old history paper, which is great. And he’s getting really excited about tonight's party. At first, the idea of doing something other than walking around Hawkins and judging people’s costumes made him feel homesick and sad but his hopes for tonight are growing by the minute.
So, after having lunch with a few people from history class, he goes back to his dorm. He wants to draw freely for a bit before he has to think about what he’s going to wear tonight.
A few hours later, Will is sitting at the table his dorm came with, colored pencil in hand and a piece of paper in front of him. When he sat down and started thinking about what to draw, nothing came to his mind. But while looking at his room, he saw that Halloween picture he has hung of his best friends. The Party. Now all he could think about was their DnD characters. It had been so long since he’d draw them. When college started, between having many class projects and meeting so many new people, he had so much more to gain inspiration from. But it felt good, drawing what he had always known again.
It’s a simple one. Just them four in a dark forest, surrounding a magic flower in the center, looking intensely at it. Lucas on the far left, Will next, Mike next to him and Dustin on the far right. The flower is similar to a Lily, emanating light from within that shines upon them.
He likes the finished product. It’s not his best, but it doesn’t look too bad. Will sets the paper down at the table, taking a final look at it. He really does miss them. Especially Mike. It’s not because Lucas, Dustin, Max and El mean less to him, he loves them dearly. But with Mike… it has always been different, even before he grew aware of his feelings for him. He’s not gonna lie, it wasn’t like he immediately got over him after moving. It had been years of pinning. The worst was when Mike and El broke up after Lenora and Will really thought for a moment that he might have a chance. But, with Mike’s “Friends? No thanks, best friends.”, after he came out, waiting felt pointless. But it has certainly made it easier to keep his mind off him by not seeing him. Out of sight, out of mind, right? And then, Carlton came along. It was the right thing to do. He wasn’t going to lie there waiting for him knowing that Mike doesn’t even have the ability to like him back.
His watch beeps and makes Will check the time. He should start thinking about that outfit now. So he gets up and opens the closet.
⇟
Mike’s standing in front of the mirror. Again. He’s been rotating outfits for the past half hour. Barely nothing seems fitting for a Halloween party. He ends up choosing the blue long sleeve t-shirt, black trousers and a jacket combo and takes off his glasses. Must be enough, right? However it is, if he stays any longer in his dorm he’s gonna end up chickening out, so he grabs the keys and opens the door.
The walk to the local bar is not long and the air is not as cold as he thought it would be. When he gets to the nearest corner to the bar he can already hear the music. There’s a lot of people walking around in costumes, most of them are obviously last minute but it’s nice anyway. It’s still his favourite holiday for a reason.
He arrives at the bar and walks inside. They’re supposed to not be able to serve alcohol to people under 21 but it looks like it’s not really working, especially on a Halloween night. He walks around, taking a look at everyone’s costumes. There’s a few vampires and werewolves, the basics. Beetlejuice is still fresh from last year so there’s some of that too. There’s a guy dressed as the one from Little Shop of Horrors. Oh, and there’s a trio dressed as that weird doctor from the Rocky Horror movie and the other marriage. Next to them is a guy who is only wearing a cape… is it supposed to be a cap-
Oh, no.
There he is. He- He’s there. Will. He’s laughing. And talking. And that cape guy, he’s… close. Really close. And Will’s laughing.
Mike’s limbs have lost all movement. Everyone is moving around him. But he can’t. He wants to. But nothing. Moves. Not even his eyes. He can’t look away. He can’t. He has to or else, Will’s gonna see him. He can’t. He can’t see him. He can’t. He can’t.
Will sees him.
From across the room. Green eyes looking straight at him. Not a blink. Not a word. Not a sound.
Move. Move. Move.
Mike’s not moving. But Will is. He’s walking past the cape guy, not even looking at him. His eyes are fixed on Mike.
God, please. Move.
His prayings must have been heard because finally, his legs move. He sprints to the front door, the cold, smoke free air hits him like a truck. But it’s good. His muscles are waking up quickly.
“Mike!”
Oh, no.
He can’t turn back. It’s only going to make things worse. He can’t face it.
“Mike, wait!”
Still, he moves forward. He can’t do it.
A hand grabs him by the elbow and forces him to turn around. He’s met by those big green eyes. Mike’s looking back, eyes just as wide.
“Mike.” Will says, gasping for air. But he doesn’t lose his grip on him. “What the hell are you doing here?”
“Uhm. I- I just. I just-” Guess there’s no point in lying. “I just go here.”
“You just go here?” Oh he’s mad. “What the fuck kind of response is that?” Will finally lets go of his arm. “Since when?”
“Since… uhm. Since the beginning of the year.” His voice low.
Will doesn’t respond this time. He just keeps looking at Mike. His brows furrowed and his mouth tense.
“I can explain.” Mike starts.
“You better.”
Mike’s breath catches but he tries his best to breathe. That tight feeling in his chest again.
“I wasn’t sure where to go. No place called to me enough. And then, I remembered how you were gonna move to New York and, you know how everyone is always talking about how cool New York is. So I just- I just changed the envelope, uhm, filled the registration and, uhm. Came… Here. I didn’t really know what I was doing, I promise. It was all just… last minute.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I just… I’ve been really uhm. Lost? I guess? I don’t really know what’s going on. I don’t know- I don’t know what I’m doing here.” His head is going a hundred miles an hour. And he feels so, so small. But, he looks up at Will and he sees that look. That hurt look he gets when Mike really fucks it up. “I haven’t been avoiding you, Will. I promise. I just haven’t seen you. I’m telling the truth, Will. You have to believe me. You have to believe me.”
“Mike.”
“I really am sorry. I don’t- I don’t know what’s going on.” He feels cold tears start to slice his cheeks in half. He immediately wipes them out. “I didn’t mean to lie to you Will. I don’t- I don’t know what. I don’t.”
“Will!”
Mike looks up. It’s cape guy. He’s followed them outside. How long has he been standing there?
“Will, what’s going on?” He asks now.
“Give me a minute, Carlton.”
Oh, so he has a name. God, Mike has to get out of here.
“I’m sorry, Will. Okay? I… I have to go.” He starts walking back to his dorm.
“Mike, wait!”
He hears Will shout, but he’s too far gone to turn back.