Chapter Text
Somewhere in Black Sapphire’s kitchen, three Beasts stood around with absolutely no idea what to do.
There was silence.
Too much silence.
Burning Spice stared suspiciously at a rectangular device resting innocently on the counter, a mix of distrust and curiosity written all over his face.
“What is this strange object?” he asked, poking it experimentally.
Nothing happened.
“Is it some kind of campfire for heating things?, a magical oven?” he muttered thinking hard, crossing his arms.
“Perhaps a portable fire altar used to heat offerings?”
“That doesn’t look like an oven,” Silent Salt said, stepping beside him.
Mystic Flour tilted her head slightly.
“Well… it does have a door. It could be a variant.”
She examined the panel full of buttons.
“Why does it have so many symbols? No one needs this many options just to cook.”
Burning Spice leaned in closer.
“No grates. No flames. Definitely not an oven.”
He frowned deeply.
“So how exactly is this thing supposed to burn?”
“Clearly not with magic,” Mystic Flour replied calmly.
“There’s no trace of it here. And if there were, it would be the little we still have.”
Silent Salt picked up a plate.
“Perhaps the fire exists beyond our perception, maybe it's invisible to us.”
The three exchanged curious glances.
And really—what else were they supposed to do?
Curiosity killed the cat after all.
“Should we try something?” Burning Spice suggested. “Okay?”
Silent Salt placed the plate inside the unknown artifact—only for a hand to stop him.
“Doesn’t this require some kind of prior knowledge or caution?” Mystic Flour asked.
“Psssshh, nah,” Burning Spice waved it off.
“Like that annoying jester once said—”
He imitated Shadow Milk’s voice from his scholar era.
“Knowledge comes through experience.”
Silent Salt nodded, convinced.
Without further hesitation, he placed the plate back inside and shut the door.
They then stared at the buttons like they were ancient, incomprehensible runes.
“Maybe this one turns it on?” Silent Salt said, pressing a random button.
The microwave immediately began to hum.
The Beasts jumped back in unison.
“…It’s alive,” Mystic Flour whispered.
The plate started spinning.
Burning Spice’s eyes lit up.
“OH—SO THAT’S HOW IT WORKS! HAHAHA!”
“There’s no fire…” Silent Salt observed with fascination.
Mystic Flour watched the rotating plate closely.
“…Perhaps it does use magic.”
Burning Spice grinned.
“Then it’s settled.”
He grabbed a metal spoon from the drawer.
“I wonder what happens if the spoon heats up too. HAHAHA!”
“If it worked with the plate,” Silent Salt said thoughtfully,
“then it should work with the spoon.”
“We’ll find out! HAHAHA—”
Burning Spice opened the door and tossed the plate aside without caring if it broke.
“Well then, spoon, you’re nex—”
“WAIT,” Mystic Flour began.
Too late.
The metal spoon clattered into the microwave.
One second of absolute silence.
Then—
SPARKS.
The microwave erupted with bright explosions, lightning-like flashes bouncing violently inside.
“DAMN IT, IT’S ANGRY!” Burning Spice yelled.
“TURN IT OFF!” Mystic Flour shouted.
Silent Salt mashed buttons at random.
Flames appeared.
“FIRE!” Burning Spice yelled, stepping back.
Smoke filled the kitchen as the microwave roared like an electrical beast.
All three panicked at once.
“GET RID OF IT!” Mystic Flour shouted.
Burning Spice yanked the microwave open, grabbed the entire machine, and lifted it with effort.
“HOT-HOT-DAMN IT!”
He blew on it desperately. It did nothing.
“THE WINDOW!” Silent Salt pointed.
Thankfully, the window was already open. With an entirely unnecessary heroic yell, Burning Spice hurled the microwave outside.
It crashed into the garden with a loud thud only witches would understand.
Silence followed.
Of course there was silence.
They had almost burned the house down.
Smoke drifted through the window as they stood there, breathing heavily, processing what had just happened.
Mystic Flour calmly fixed her hair.
“…not an oven"
Silent Salt nodded.
“Definitely not.”
Burning Spice crossed his arms, offended.
“In my defense… ovens don’t usually explode like that…”
He glanced at the others.
“Oh—did I ever tell you I was actually born in an oven? HAHAHAHAHA!”
Silence.
“…What?” he said.
“Why the long faces? HAHAHA!”
Footsteps echoed from the hallway.
Black Sapphire’s voice followed.
“Why does it smell burned…?”
He peeked in.
“MY KITCHEN!”
His eyes snapped to the open window, smoke still drifting in.
His microwave was gone.
“WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY MICROWAVE?!”
He grabbed his hair in disbelief.
The three Beasts exchanged looks, saying nothing.
Shadow Milk appeared in the doorway.
He looked at the kitchen.
Then the open window.
He smiled slowly.
“…I’m not going to ask.”
——
Night began to fall.
Shadow Milk, Eternal Sugar, and little Candy were putting the final touches on their work. It was best to rest and continue in the morning.
“Alright, everyone!” Black Sapphire said enthusiastically.
“Let’s take a break and have dinner. I bought food for all of us. Since certain curious idiots destroyed my microwave, I can’t even give you anything cold.”
“PSSSH, it wasn’t that bad,” Burning Spice said.
Black Sapphire sighed.
“Tomorrow we’ll talk about the full plan—how you’re going to bypass the authorities.”
He paused.
“…But first, let’s eat.”
The Beasts and the siblings gathered around the small table, sharing the space.
“Take whatever you like,” Black Sapphire said, serving himself rice.
“HAHAHA, actually we Beasts don’t need—”
“AUGH—WHAT—AAA—”
Burning spice clutched his mouth in pain
“I remind you,” Mystic Flour murmured, having stepped on his foot with her heel,
“that we cannot say anything suspicious.”
Then she smiled politely at black sapphire
“Thank you very much for offering us a place to rest and something to eat.”
“She’s right,” Silent Salt added, bowing his head.
“Despite destroying your magical artifact, we are grateful.”
“Yes… thank you,” Eternal Sugar said sleepily.
Shadow Milk said nothing—but Black Sapphire understood.
“Well. I’m only doing this for my sister’s sake,” he said.
“But you’re welcome. Eat.”
The Beasts smiled quietly.
It was the first time in millennia they had eaten together again.
Just like they were Virtues once more.
——
Three days passed.
They had new identities.
New names.
Invented histories.
Borrowed experiences.
And striking new outfits.
Candy Apple had truly outdone herself, the Beast of Deceit thought.
Ah, how he missed his minions.
But this was not the time to weep.
They studied their documents, perfected their lies-
and who better to teach deception than Shadow Milk himself, even if he hated reliving it?
Despite his reluctance, they crafted a flawless performance.
Black Sapphire was fascinated by the illusion of the new university student Shadow Milk-
or rather,
Shane.
The day before, Black Sapphire reminded them they had to attend the freshman welcome speech.
Two hours of speeches.
One hour of campus tours and schedules.
Torture.
Now they stood before the gates of Blueberry-Yogurt University, dressed impeccably, radiating confidence.
After all, they were still Beasts.
And these witches were nothing without magic.
They sat together, waiting for the auditory torture to begin.
“Great,” Shadow Milk grumbled, slouching in his chair.
“Tell me when it’s over,” Eternal Sugar yawned.
“I’ll nap.”
The other three accepted their fate.
A woman with an authoritative voice spoke.
“Now, the school committee will give the welcome address.”
Applause erupted.
The Beasts clapped along, mimicking the witches. Blending in was necessary.
Then-
They froze.
On stage, beneath bright lights and applause, stood two painfully familiar figures.
No.
Even in this world, them?
They weren’t the same-but they were them.
The first figure stepped forward.
White Lily.
The president of the student council
Elegant. Calm. Steady voice.
And beside her stood the Vice President: No one else but Pure Vanilla.
Same gentle posture.
Same sickeningly sweet smile.
“How disgusting,” Shadow Milk thought, rolling his eyes.
“THEY FOLLOWED US,” Burning Spice whispered loudly.
“That’s impossible, you idiot,” Mystic Flour muttered.
“Welcome, dear classmates and new students!” White Lily spoke warmly.
“The school committee is delighted to have you-”
Blah blah blah blah, Shadow Milk mentally added.
Perfect.
Just perfect.
The Beasts were cornered again.
Was this the end?
Or could they successfully manipulate these unfamiliar versions of their other halves?
…