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The Emptiness of Feelings

Chapter 3

Notes:

I don’t know if Yuma and Shun were at the pairs FS. I think Yuma was, but I didn’t see Shun? idk just pretend they were there.

Anyways I would like to dedicate this chapter to all gladiator programs out there, as well as Shun’s exhibition which I absolutely love.

I don’t think Milan actually has any snow. If they don’t, then they do now idc.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

This whole Olympics had simultaneously been the best and worst experience of Shun's life.

The best, because he had put out two clean free skates, scored a personal best, and won a medal. Two, actually. He had finally achieved his lifelong dream of going to the olympics. Oh, and he had spent every waking hour with Yuma.

Ironically, the last reason was also why the whole time had been absolute torture. Hiding his crush for the older man is no easy feat. Kaori and Riku had been giving him knowing looks throughout the team event and even after. Kao, the only one he had actually confided in, looked like he was internally laughing at Shun's pain.

Shun jolted out of his thoughts as Yuma's hand trapped his own in a death grip. Riku and Ryu skated out as their names were called.

Four elements in, Yuma still hadn't let go of his hand. "I really hate pairs skating," he said as they pushed up into a lift.

"Mmh," Shun nodded, too scared to look away.

The lifts churned his stomach. It was even worse after yesterday. He, Yuma and Kao hadn't gone to the event in person, but they had sat up in Yuma's room watching it together.

"I freaking love programs to Gladiator," Shun whispered to Yuma.

The two boys jumped up as the program finished, applauding with all their might.

They were still applauding as the two skaters left the ice.

"That was so beautiful," Yuma said tearfully. "I really hope they get their gold, they would deserve it." At least it wasn't Shun who was crying this time.

The whole arena held their breaths as the scores were announced. Yuma and Shun were up like rockets, on their feet again as they set a personal best.

"Come on," Yuma yanked him up off his seat. "They'll let us down there while the others are warning up."

Shun was a little apprehensive, but he followed anyways. He really didn't want to be left alone here. The large crowd was overstimulating enough already.

Yuma dragged him down the hallways and towards the door skaters often used to get into the main area. Thankfully, one of the earlier skaters came out at exactly the same time as they got there, so they slipped in after her.

They spotted the pair on the leader's sofas and beelined for them. Riku looked up and saw them first, waving them over with a delighted look on her face.

"That was so good!" Shun exclaimed.

"I dont know how you guys do it," Yuma shook his head, smiling. "I could never."

"Don't lie, Yuma. We all know it's every male singles skater's dream to be a pairs girl." Riku laughed at him. "You guys are always asking to be lifted at exhibitions."

"Ok, so maybe. But that's not the point right now!" Shun laughed. "Was that a world record?"

Neither skater seemed to know, but their coach nodded. "Yeah, in the free skate, but not overall."

Ryu just cried harder at that. "It was a world record as well?!"

Riku rolled her eyes. "Yuma, help me. You've had a lot of practice with crying people over the last few days, how do you do it? It feels like he hasn't stopped since last night!"

"Hey!" Shun said, put out, at the same time as Yuma said, "Just go with it, I don't know." He slung an arm around Shun's shoulders, briefly bumping the sides of their heads together.

"Sorry," Shun apologized. He wasn't entirely sure what for, crying all week, maybe, but it felt like the right thing to say.

"Don't be stupid. I like it when you let yourself feel all your emotions."

Oh. Shun had no idea how to respond to that. He settled for nothing.

"We really just came down to say well done, but we have to go back and watch now," Yuma hugged them both.

Shun followed suite, offering his congratulations. "Wherever you end up, we're so proud of you. Today was really the performance of a lifetime."

The two boys speed off as the announcer calls for one minute remaining in the warm up.

•~•

Shun had been lying in bed listening to music when a sharp rap on his door made him get up. Annoyed at being disturbed, he cracked the door slightly open, peering out to see Yuma, bundled up in snowpants and his team Japan jacket.

"It's snowing. We're going to throw snowballs at people," Yuma told him.

Shun knew it was snowing. They had walked to breakfast in it earlier that morning. It was the first fresh snow they'd had at the Olympics; everything on the ground was already piled up from earlier snowfalls. "Huh?" he answered intelligently.

"We're going to hit people with snow. It's fun. Have you never tried it?"

Of course he had. Shun was still confused though. "Like, just anyone?"

"Yeah!" Yuma answered cheerfully. "I was just gonna walk around the village and wreak havoc."

"Sure," Shun shrugged. "Why the hell not?"

Usually, it was Kao who had these crazy ideas, not Yuma.

"Great! Snowpants and jacket, then we can go!"

Shun threw the articles of clothing on top of what he was already wearing. Black snowpants, orangey-red jacket, and a pair of waterproof gloves.

The cold air blasted his face the second they stepped outside. He regretted, for a moment, not wearing a hat.

"Look," Yuma whispered, nudging him with his elbow. "Our first victims." He pointed at a couple of speed skaters walking together in a group. "Get them, run away so they can't get us back. Easy-peasy."

It was not easy-peasy, as he had said it would be. Their first throws were successful, but Yuma slipped on the ice when they were trying to run away, significantly slowing them down. Let's just say, the speed skaters were not pleased at the cold snowballs hitting them, and made sure to very much return the favour.

Their second outing was much improved. Madi and Even didn't even know what had (literally) hit them before they were out of the scene.

A couple of canadians later, Shun and Yuma flopped down in a snowbank, giggling. "This is actually fun," Shun remarked. At first he was sceptical, having never been as outgoing as Yuma, but he had enjoyed himself.

"I told you it would be," Yuma tilted his head towards him, eyes bright and cheeks flushed. "Come on, I know which one Kao's room is, we can get his window from the outside.

As it turns out, they didn't just get Kao's window. Shun ended up nailing him right in the face as he opened it to see what the racket was all about.

"Shit!" Shun yelled, trying to dive headfirst into the snowbank. Yuma was laughing too hard to escape.

A minute later, Kao came down. Shun shrieked as a whole pile of snow was dumped down the back of his coat.

"We're even," Kao said, satisfied. "Now, are we going to go get the americans, or what?" He guestured over to a huddle of american athletes, including some skaters.

"Sounds good. A twelve on three." Shun was too busy shivering to count how many people there actually were in the group.

"Oh my god Shun, you must be freezing. Here," Yuma unzipped his own jacket. "We can swap. I have so many layers on, you're only wearing a t-shirt under yours, and now the inside is all wet."

"That's very kind of you to offer, but you don't need-"Shun's protests were cut off by a "nonsense!" cry from Yuma.

"If you catch a cold now, you won't have fun at the gala."

Shun let the jackets get swapped over. Dear god, how he hated Kao's smirk. He had for sure planned this at some point.

He had been doing remarkably well at controlling the colour of his face, until Yuma turned his back towards him and strutted closer to the americans.

There, written in bright white letters, was his name. Sato.

That meant Shun had Kagiyama scrawled across his lower back.

He ducked his face into the jacket's collar, hoping he could just play his blush off as being cold. Unfortunately for him, hiding just made it ten times worse. Now, he could smell Yuma's pomegranate scented body wash on the coat.

He managed to gather his senses, just narrowly dodging the massive snowball that came flying his way.

"Why are you wearing Yuma's coat?" Ilia asked him in japanese. Not for the first time, Shun was thankful Ilia could speak his language, it meant he didn't have to stutter over his own english.

"I don't want to talk about it," Shun grumbled.

He really didn't like the look Ilia and Kao exchanged as they went to help their fellow countrymen in the fight.

Figuring he should probably help his teammates in their futile battle, he followed quickly, managing to get Max in the stomach as he went.

The americans admitted defeat shortly after the Canadians joined in.

Ilia threw his hands up in frustration as Adam hurled another snowball his way. He tried to throw one back, but Paul, with his lightning-fast reflexes, stuck his hand out to catch it. Team Canada seemed to have a soft spot for Adam. Shun wondered just how much time he was spending around them with Stephen.

Yuma clapped him on the back. "You were good at that," he beamed.

"Thanks," Shun laughed nervously, wringing his hands together.

He felt a hand come up to his hair, delicate fingers brushing the snow out of the strands. "You look so pretty like this."

"Thanks," he stammered out again. What a stupid response. "I mean - ah," he let out a squeak of surprise as Yuma pushed their noses and foreheads together.

"Can I kiss you?" Yuma whispered, eyes dropping lower to Shun's lips.

"Yes." Shun didn't care that anyone walking by could see them right now. All he could feel was the warmth radiating off Yuma.

•~•

"I can't believe it took you guys this long to figure it out," Kaori complained to them, in the dressing room during the gala.

"In fairness, I don't think I was too obvious about it," Shun tried to defend himself, but didn't continue when he saw half the room's raised eyebrows.

"Misha figured it out within 10 seconds of medaling with you guys, and he doesn't even speak Japanese," Kaori told him. "You two are the most oblivious people I've ever met."

"Fine, so it took us a couple months go get here. So what?"

"A couple of months?!" Ilia scoffed in disbelief. "More like a couple of years."

They were saved from further banter by Niina asking for three volunteers for her gala.

Ilia practically fell to his knees. "Me please please please," he begged.

"Ok, I have one," She said.

Stephen turned to Adam. "Not you. You looked wayyyy to into it at worlds." Adam just shook his head and leaned into Stephen.

The canadian needn't have worried, as Niina quickly ended up with Jun and Tim as her other two victims.

"Shun Sato? You're up next," a volunteer called him from outside.

"Coming," Shun called back. He was very proud that he didn't trip over the english.

"Wait," Yuma stopped him just as he'd finished taking off his jacket. He leaned up to press a kiss to his cheek. "For good luck."

Shun let out a massive smile, any earlier nerves forgotten.

Oh, how he loved Yuma Kagiyama.

Notes:

Ahh I loved writing this so much.

Also this will not be the end of this series-like thing, i’ll just keep adding onto it as I get more ideas.

Do the team japan jackets have names on the back? Idk. I don’t think so. But I liked adding that as an extra detail

Notes:

I wrote this from Shun’s PoV for some extra yearning (not that yuma isn’t he’s just gonna be a little less pathetic about it) and found out halfway through that I actually really like writing him.

This was meant to be 1 chapter with like 1k words max and now i have an outline for chapters two three and maybe four (but idk yet so it’s not included in chapter count)

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