Chapter Text
Hannah slowly stood up from her car in the parking lot of the restaurant. A light breeze blew a few flurries around as she swung her purse over her shoulder. She wrapped her coat around her as she slammed her car door shut. Her hand hovered over the door handle to lock her car before she walked towards the door. Her heels clacking against the pavement, she grabbed her phone from her pocket to check the time. It was currently 10 minutes past the time Benji texted her, which she didn't really care about.
She passed through the crowds as she walked in towards the hostess stand. Her eyes darted around until she noticed a group sitting in the corner near the entrance. As she walked closer, she noticed Benji turn to her and smile.
“Hannah, you showed up!!” Benji yelled out. He quickly stood up to hug her. Hannah giggled, hugging him back.
“Hey,” She smiled at him once they pulled away. He awkwardly pulled down his Naruto shirt under his flannel before he sat back down. Hannah turned to sit down before looking towards the two across from her.
Jade and Isabel sat on the other side of the table, glancing up at her. Both of them looked much different than the last time she saw them on the show. Jade had on a turtle shirt under her green cardigan, which fell off one of her shoulders, and a white headband through her curls. Isabel, sitting right next to her, smiled. Her brown waves peeked out from the bottom of her white lace veil that loosely wrapped around her head. Her navy blue sweater was bunching up where it fell as Isabel held her phone in her hand.
“Oh my god, Isa!” Hannah hurried over to her, and Isabel stood up to hug her.
“I haven't seen you in so long, you look so different!”
Isabel shrugged, “Well, I am not a part of a convent anymore, been more open with my style since I started working at my church in Florida.”
“All Isa has done since we got here is just complain how much colder it is than at home,” Jade interrupted before Isa quickly sat down and faced her, saying something to her quietly before Jade smiled and looked back at Hannah.
“Hey Hannah, how have you been?”
“Fine,” Hannah said, lying through her teeth as she awkwardly stood near the edge of the table.
Hannah finally moved to pull out her chair next to Benji and sat down. Spencer sat on the other side of Benji. Hannah glanced over, noticing he hadn’t looked over at her since she got there.
“Should I have said hi to you, too, Spencer?” Hannah joked before he looked up.
“If you aren't going to start blaming me like the last time we saw each other.”
Hannah glared over at him, “Why would I start blaming you for things from 2 years ago?”
“How am I supposed to know? You were very unpredictable then could be the same now.”
“Right….” Hannah said before going into silence.
“So, Hannah… are you still dating Logan?” Jade asked as they all sat there in silence. Hannah’s head snapped up to look at her. The weight in her chest grew as her face dropped.
From the corner of her eye, she noticed Benji shake his head at Jade. Her mouth dropped before she spoke, “I didn't know, sorry-”
Hannah forced a small smile. “It’s fine, Benji didn’t even know until yesterday.”
Hannah's face fell back into a frown before she took a deep breath and scraped her chair against the floor as she pushed it back.
“I have to go to the bathroom,” she said, already standing. “Don’t wait for me.”
Hannah quickly grabbed her purse before she began to make her way towards a hallway on the other side of the restaurant. The noise in the restaurant overwhelmed her as she stood in front of the side door. She scanned for a sign, and when she found none, she shoved it open. Her breath came unevenly as she let go of the handle, the door slamming shut behind her.
As she followed to the edge of the sidewalk, the busy noise inside the restaurant faded until nothing remained, replaced by cars passing in the street, which she watched. Her fingers quickly ran to dig into her purse, fumbling for a lighter and a pack of cigarettes. Her hands trembled as she flicked the lighter; a small orange flame radiated at the white tip. The sharp smell of burning filled the air before she slipped the cigarette between her teeth and pocketed the lighter.
Hannah pulled it out of her mouth as she wrapped an arm across herself, shaking from the chill of the air as the breeze hit her skin. The gray smoke spilling from her lips as she tilted her head back. Putting it to her mouth once again, she stared out until she heard the door she just came through open. A cough quickly fell out of her lips, and Hannah stumbled as she quickly turned around. Her hand with the cigarette rushing behind her.
"I don't care if you're smoking," Spencer said, appearing in the doorway.
“Thank god” Hannah muttered as she placed it back between her lips. She quickly turned away. The anxiety built up as all her thoughts turned to why he was the only one to follow behind her. Losing her train of thought once she heard the door slam. She turned towards him again to see standing next to her, looking out where she was just looking.
“Are you alright?” he said after moments of silence.
Hannah shrugged as she blew the smoke out. “I’m fine.”
“I wouldn't say you're fine if you practically ran to excuse yourself to take a smoke.”
Hannah rolled her eyes, “Out of anybody, I don't have to tell you why I came out here.”
It went silent as Spencer watched Hannah stare away from him. Her cigarette moving back to her lips again and again.
“I'm assuming you two breaking up is more than what one could assume due to your reaction?” he asked.
“Yeah,” Hannah whispered, her eyes shutting before she took a deep breath. Her eyes opened again and moved towards the ground as she dropped the cigarette in her hand. The front of her heel moved to squish it before kicking it down into the rocks around the pavement.
“I broke up with him after he told me he wanted to get married.”
“Oh”
Both of them quickly fell into silence, the tense atmosphere as Hannah debated what to even say. She kept her gaze out towards the distant cars, refusing to meet Spencer’s eyes. Her arms moved to hug tightly around herself, the chill in the air causing her to shiver.
“Does it ever get easier?” She asked after they stood there awhile. She was deeply debating whether she wanted to grab another cigarette.
“Eventually,” Spencer replied. Hannah hummed in response.
“What about-” she started before she stopped herself.
Spencer's eyes went wide before he glanced off where she was looking and sighed.
“That was different, but ignorance is bliss.” He paused before he turned towards her again, “It's better to push it away to prevent whatever could happen.”
Hannah hugged herself tighter as she sniffled, “I don't think for myself, I can ever forgive him.”
“And that’s your decision, putting yourself above those who do not make you better.”
Hannah took a deep breath as she nodded, “Thanks…” she said before she paused, “We should head back in.”
Hannah approached the door and opened it, her hand holding the door as she looked back at Spencer. His quiet footsteps slowly got closer as he walked up and placed his hand on the door above hers. Hannah's hand fell from the door as she began walking back towards the table inside the restaurant with her head down.
Hannah pulled out her chair and sat down, her head turning to Spencer as he sat down right after her.
“Sorry, that took longer than I hoped…” Hannah nervously laughed as everyone looked at her. Her eyes glanced over at Spencer a few times, and each time, he was still looking at her.
Hannah kicked off her heels the second she walked into her room. Kicking them over towards her other shoes as she set her phone and purse down onto the bed next to her. Her hands reached up to take her earrings out before her phone lit up with a notification.
Now
Benji, Jade, and 2 others
Jade: Hey, guys! Thank you for coming (especially you, Hannah). Isa and I are staying in Toronto for a few more days if you guys wanna meet up again :)
Hannah smiled as she read the message, piling her earrings into her hands as she took them out. She slowly stood up and walked over to place them on her nightstand before heading to her closet to dig for something to change into. Sorting through the hangers, she pulled out a purple off-the-shoulder top. Carrying it back to the bed before setting it down. Her fingers moved to untie the back of her dress when her phone lit up.
Now
###-###-####
Wanted to check in, are you doing okay still?
Now
###-###-####
It’s Spencer, was assuming you do not have my number.
Hannah quickly moved to pick up her phone. Her dress slowly started to fall down.
Hannah: Yeah, doing better than before, I guess, haha
Hannah: Thanks for talking to me
Hannah stared at her phone for a few more seconds before she set it back down. Her hands moved back to finish taking her dress off. It fell to the ground as Hannah took her shirt off the hanger and threw it over her head. She bent down, grabbed her dress, and hurried towards the closet. After finally putting it on the hanger, she picked her phone up and walked towards the kitchen. Her phone lit up again with a notification from Spencer. Hannah smiled as she read the message.