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Alysa and Amber just stared at each other before bursting out laughing and sprinting out of the room.
“Welp, that wasn’t what I was expecting,” murmured Ilia from where he had buried his face in Misha’s shoulder.
EXHIBITION GALA
Ilia had done his best to ignore the negative comments that he had received since his cursed free skate but some were hard to ignore
Failure
Fraud
Loser
Imposter
He’d been planning his exhibition gala performance for weeks. But now it was even more important for him, Ilia had already done the Team USA performance and his cameo for Niina Petrõkina’s skate but now that it was almost his turn, his heart was beating much too fast.
He slid down the wall until he was sitting with his head tipped back trying to get his breathing back under control. He didn’t know how long he had been sitting there when Misha sat down next to him.
“You’re on next,” Misha murmured as he tried to drag Ilia to his feet, “show them who you are.”
Ilia nodded and took a deep breath and walked out to where he would sit until his name was called. He had chosen Fear long before his skate but now it meant even more than before and he knew he had to land everything to prove himself again. When the sound of the notifications started he immediately shut off all of the rest of his emotions and put all of his focus on his performance.
He did well in the end but he couldn’t get past the feeling of failure. He smiled through the interviews and answered all the questions but by the time he got back to his room he was drained. Physically and mentally. He dragged his feet and opened the door for Misha, acting like nothing was happening as he curled up and drifted off the sleep next to the boy he loved.
The next few days felt like a drag but eventually the games ended and he was able to go home after Art on Ice to reset and relax. Misha visited him a couple times while he trained for Worlds but he finally felt happy just spending time with his favorite person. As he got on the plane in first class on the way to Worlds he leaned his head on Misha’s shoulder and whispered,
“I’m glad I’m doing this with you.”
Mikhail didn’t respond but he had a soft smile on his face as the pilot got on the overhead system to tell the plane that they were departing shortly. And as the plane went through the clouds he felt at peace. Finally.