Chapter Text
Akito had done his own fair share of grumbling when Ena had first asked him to arrange a meeting between her and Shiraishi-san, grumblings only placated by a promise of pancakes—her treat. Even with the promised compensation, he still scowled a bit when he met her at the school gates.
“I don’t see why I’m even needed here.”
“Because you said it yourself, Shiraishi-san always leaves the second school gets out—to practice with you, I might add—and this is important.” Ena responded with her own scowl.
“How so?”
“It just is!”
Akito gave her a scathing look, eyebrows raised. “Fine, if you say so. Let’s go.” He gestured with his head and led her into the school building. It seemed they were going to the roof—a good choice—she had wanted a private place to talk—but as she climbed up the steps, she felt a pang of regret. The last time she had been on the roof, she had promised to wait for Mizuki, and look how that had turned out. ‘I just lied to her…” Ena clenched her fists and followed Akito through the door and out onto the roof.
The chilly breeze that had been blowing her entire walk to school was bitter cold up on the high, exposed area. Ena shivered and pulled her jacket closer to her. She spotted Shiraishi leaning against the wall of the roof access, the area most sheltered from the wind.
“Heya, Ena-san!” Shiraishi popped up with a grin and approached the two Shinonomes. “Akito, too.” Ena noticed that Shiraishi’s uniform had the boys’ tie instead of a ribbon tied into a bow.
“‘Sup, An.” Akito glanced at Ena, silently asking if she wanted him to leave.
“No, you can stay, I guess. It’s not like it’s anything you can’t hear.”
Akito shrugged and finally shut the door behind them, while Shiraishi stared at the two of them, mystified. “Wow, the power of siblings: asking a question with a single look! You two really are similar.”
“We are not!” Ena snapped, immediately horrified as Akito did the exact same. She shook her head, trying to get back on track. “Anyways, Shiraishi-san, I wanted to talk to you about Mizuki.”
“Mizuki?” Shiraishi tilted her head. “What do you need to know? The two of you are close friends, right?”
Ena nodded. “The thing is, I haven’t been able to contact them in a few days—since Friday. We were supposed to go shopping on Saturday, but they never showed up.” Another cold breeze blew past, ruffling Ena’s hair and piercing straight through her layers. The sun was beginning to set, turning the afternoon sky pink near the horizon. It was only going to get colder.
Shiraishi’s eyes widened slightly, her easygoing smile fading away into a worried frown. “Well, um. Sh–they didn’t show up for afternoon classes, but that isn’t all that rare for them. They even texted me to ask for my notes afterward.” She laughed nervously. “Even though they really should know I don’t take good notes.”
Akito, his hands shoved into his pockets, peered at the two girls. “Akiyama’s not talking to you? Is it something you did? Is that why you’ve been so grouchy lately?”
“No–I mean, maybe? If I did something wrong, I’m not sure what it was… I heard from someone that she had a bad day on Friday, and then she sounded a bit strange when she called to invite me out shopping.”
Shiraishi sighed. “Come to think of it, some boys in our year were being little jerks to her on Friday. I told them off, like usual but…”
“Huh?” For the third time in several days, Ena felt the tips of her fingers growing cold, the world beneath her feet tilting precariously. “Like usual? Mizuki’s never mentioned anything like that before.”
“Ah!” An’s frown grew longer, mouth hanging open in distress. “I mean– It’s nothing too bad usually. Just snide comments about the way they dress.”
“The way… It’s just… They’ve never…” Ena took a rattling breath and did her best to calm down a bit. “T-thank you for letting me know, Shiraishi-san. My classes start soon, so I better get going.”
“Of course. I’ll let you know if I hear anything from Mizuki—and, if it’s not too much to ask: you’re Akito’s sister, so feel free to just call me An.” She gave Ena an encouraging grin.
Ena returned it with a weak half-smile. “Okay, An-san. Have a good evening.” She waved goodbye to An and Akito and made her way back down the stairs on legs like jelly.
An looked over at Akito, a frown returning to her face. “Let’s get to practice. Best not leave Kohane and Toya waiting.”
Kanade winced under the weight of the bag in her hands as she made her way up the street towards the hospital. The changes of clothes for her father always encumbered her to an uncomfortable degree, but in the cold it was agonizingly worse. She just felt so sluggish.
It would almost have been easier to just stay home and bring the clothes another day when the sun was actually out and she was feeling less unsteady, but she’d reached a block in her demo and staring into the blue light of her screen without making any progress was starting to frustrate her. Kanade thought she knew the cause of her block as well; it had been a long time since she’d worried so much about someone—not since she’d had to compose a song for Ena, maybe.
As she entered the hospital, a familiar nurse greeted her. “Good afternoon, Yoisaki-san.” For a single moment, the reckless idea of asking the nurse if an Akiyama Mizuki had been admitted recently crossed her mind, but before she could act on that, the nurse continued.
“Your father should be awake, though I can’t say for sure how much he remembers today.” The nurse gave her an equally familiar pitying smile, and Kanade thanked her quietly before following the familiar route to her father’s room in the long-term care ward.
His room was furnished the same as usual, the window blinds open to let in the weak light. Kanade noted the wilted flowers in the vase on her father’s bedside—she’d have to bring fresh ones next time she visited—before giving him her full attention.
Her father was sitting up in bed, a book in his lap. As she shut the door behind her, he looked up at her with a vacant smile on his gaunt, tired face and raised one slender hand in greeting.
“Good afternoon, Yoisaki-san. How are you feeling today?” Kanade swallowed the strange feeling of speaking to her father so politely.
“A bit sluggish. I’m afraid it’s the cold’s fault. You are… Kanade-san, right? I’m sorry, it seems my memory is not what it used to be. I can’t remember where I know you from, but I recognize you as a frequent visitor nevertheless.”
Kanade nodded, setting down the change of clothes she’d brought on the visitor’s chair. She would have to remember to bring a sweater for him next week. There were a few in his old dresser that he’d loved.
Her chore done, she went to his bedside to visit for a bit, more for his sake than hers. Due to the circumstances of his condition and his long-term stay, there was not much hospital equipment but he still had some monitors. She stared blankly at them, hardly listening to his abbreviated review of the book he was reading—she hardly even remembered asking. Her mind wandered to a horrible idea of Mizuki hooked up to a bunch of machines. Perhaps that was the reason for her disappearance. Perhaps like her father, she had damned them.
A thrill of fear that she couldn’t quite hide shot through her, and her father noticed the change in her expression. “Is… Is something the matter, Kanade-san?”
“Huh? Um, no. Everything’s alright.”
“Are you sure? You just had the most terrible expression on your face. If it’s because of my condition, I can understand. It is rather depressing for me to be stuck here while my wife is pregnant with our little girl.”
“No… that isn’t it. Sorry, it’s just that I recently lost contact with one of my friends and I’m not sure what to do. I’m afraid that something happened to them.”
Her father frowned. “That is a troubling problem… I’m not sure how much I can help out with that, but I do believe good things can happen if you work hard enough. If you keep trying to find your friend, I’m sure you’ll figure something out.”
“Ah… Thank you d–Yoisaki-san.” Kanade swallowed and turned back towards the door. “It’s about that time, so I’ll leave you to your rest.”
“I see. Thank you for visiting me. The next time you visit, please let me know if you’ve found your friend.”
With one last goodbye, Kanade left her father’s room, and the hospital. She thought that if she’d stayed any longer, she might let something else slip out. Either tears, or the truth that she was his daughter. That would be no good; it would only confuse him more, and if he was ever going to heal, he needed as little stress as he could get.
As she trudged back towards her house, lugging dirty laundry this time, the sun peaked through the clouds for just a second, warming her face. If she kept trying, maybe they could find Mizuki like he’d said. She still had no solution to that problem, nor the issue with her current demo, but something better was already starting to come to her. Kanade picked up the pace; she had to get home and compose.
“I’m scrapping the demo I’ve been working on.” Kanade sat in her desk chair, knees pulled up to her chest as she dragged notes to a melody across the screen of her monitor. It was just after 25:00, and she, Mafuyu, and Ena had just begun working.
“Huh?”
“Are you sure, K?” Mafuyu’s voice was clear through her microphone. A bit questioning. A bit defensive.
“Yes. The other one wasn’t working out. I want to make something more meaningful.” Kanade paused to scribble down a few notes on a page of blank sheet music for later. “I’m sorry, Yuki, I’m not sure how much this one will help you find your true self, but… I wanted to compose something for Amia.”
There was a short moment of silence. “If it’s for Mizuki, then I don’t mind.”
Kanade released a bated breath. “Thank goodness. I’ve been working on it since getting home; give me an hour or two and I should have a rough demo ready for the two of you.”
“Until then,” Ena’s voice sounded distant through her microphone. Kanade figured she must be at her easel. “I think my art for the song you just finished is ready now. I’ll share it and you two tell me what you think.”
A moment later, the sound of a notification alerted Kanade that something had been sent to their file-sharing channel on Nightcord. She opened the image Ena had sent. At first glance, it resembled Ena’s typical style, although plainly different from the rough draft she had sent, but as Kanade looked over it for a second time…
“It feels… insufficient.”
“Huh?” Kanade winced as Ena’s voice peaked through her headphones.
“Are there really feelings in this? It looks like you just copied my lyrics.” Mafuyu’s voice was its regular monotone. Kanade was sure there was no vindictive nature to her words, but she could feel the tension oozing from Ena’s silence. Silence interrupted, not by a series of angry retorts, but by sniffling.
“Ena…” Kanade started to say.
“Don’t–” Clearly, even if she was crying, Ena still had enough fury to shout. “Don’t you dare even think you know anything about feelings!”
“I was just saying what I saw.”
Ena’s voice continued to rise, interspersed by pauses to sob. “As if someone blessed by talent could understand. I bet you could make a hundred works just like this with no effort! You’re like a doll!”
Ena cut herself off with a gasp, cruel silence falling over the call. Kanade did not know what to do. She wasn’t sure she’d ever heard them argue so fiercely, except maybe when Ena had first confronted Mafuyu in Sekai. What could she even do to fix this? Try to meditate? Play music? That was all she knew, after all.
“I am nothing like a doll.” The venom in Mafuyu’s voice made goosebumps pop up along Kanade’s arms. Her heart sank, now pounding somewhere beneath her stomach. She had to say something, had to stop this. Usually Mizuki would say something deflective, silly, get them to stop fighting before anything got out of hand. But Mizuki wasn’t there…
“I–” Kanade tried to say, but she wasn’t even sure what words would fix this.
“I… I didn’t mean that, Yuki—Mafuyu.” Ena’s voice had fallen, still laden with tears but now hesitant, cautious. “I think… It’s just… stupid Mizuki; it’s harder to get things how I want them to be when I’m too busy worrying about them. It’s starting to affect me…”
“...Me too. I am… worried about Mizuki.”
Kanade let out a sigh of relief. They seemed to have resolved it on their own.
“We have to find them soon…” she blurted, but thankfully, the other two only voiced their agreement.
Gaining confidence, Kanade continued, “In the meantime, Ena, we can use this if you feel like it, or the rough draft you sent, or just leave it blank. The sound we produced for the song has a bit of a rough-ish quality, so I think anything would work, especially since we won’t have an MV for it.”
“Alright, then let’s use the rough draft. I hate to use something incomplete, but it is better than this.” She finished her sentence with a snarl, full of scorn for her piece.
“I agree. The draft you drew supports the lyrics well, even if some of the lines are confusing–”
“Alright, that’s enough out of you. I’m going to mute myself and calm down a bit until this demo is ready.”
“Then I will do the same,” Mafuyu said plainly.
“Okay, then I’ll send a message when it’s ready.” Kanade heard twin notifications of Ena and Mafuyu muting and deafening, then focused back on her composing software with a sigh. It was better than lingering on what had just happened, though her heart was still beating a mile a minute. Soon enough, the song had consumed her again. Once she had the basics of the chorus, the demo would be good enough to share. She just had to find the right sound for what she was feeling.