Chapter Text
Chapter 2
Akane loved everything about her childhood home, but she was going to miss the dojo the most. She remembered the times before Ranma and Genma moved into the home when the dojo had been a place of peace. How many hours had she spent training with her father and then training alone in the solitude and quiet? She could still remember him placing his large hand over hers and forming them into fists. She remembered how young he looked when he taught and modeled how to kick with proper form. Thinking of those memories always brought a feeling, a kind of warm glowing, as she remembered how her father instilled a love for the art within her.
Then Ranma burst into her world, and the poor building descended into chaos. There had been so much training, fighting, and even a cancelled wedding in its walls. It had been destroyed and rebuilt. There were times she missed the solitary training, but it was hard to be too nostalgic for those times when Ranma had turned up the volume of her life and seemed to make her world technicolor.
She sighed as the memories glided through her mind. She moved to the center of her room and began a routine series of katas and punches. Oh, how she was going to miss this place when she moved out tomorrow. To her, it was the heart beat of the entire home.
“Hey,” came soft greeting from the doorway. “Mind sharing the space?
Akane looked over her shoulder and shrugged, “Suit yourself.” She continued through her warm up routine.
Ranma moved to a corner of the dojo. He knew better than to interrupt Akane mid warm up and pretended to occupy himself by stretching. He watched her out of the corner of his eye and stifled a groan. She had been so distant all week, ever since she had confessed to have feelings for him. It made no sense. She was moving out tomorrow and he would be leaving the following day for his own training trip, but here she was practically ignoring him. Angry thoughts bubbled into words on the edge of his lips. He wanted to curse or yell to get her attention, far and away the most successful method to gain her focus, but there was no way that idea would help his cause.
“Do you want to spar?” Ranma blurted instead.
“Huh?”
“Spar. Do you want to spar with me?”
She turned around, confusion etched all over her face, “You never want to spar with me.”
Now he had her attention! “Why not? You’re moving out tomorrow and I’ll be gone for…..a while.” He smiled at her encouragingly but looked rather sheepish.
“Are you going to actually spar or just dance around?” Akane frowned at him.
“I’ll actually fight you,” he offered.
“Promise?”
He replied with a grim face, “Promise.” He hated the thought of fighting her. He could not bear the shame and guilt if he hurt her, even accidentally, but he was bordering on desperation. He had to close the distance she had put between them before he left, and if it was sparring she wanted, he could give her that.
Akane grinned as Ranma flipped his hand, smirked, and gestured with his extended hand for her to begin. She flew at him a flurry of hit and kicks. They went back and forth with Akane using her strength and force to try to land a hit and Ranma dodging easily but also giving her an opportunity to avoid his return attacks. Akane knew he was pulling his punches and holding back, but it felt like the first time he had ever given the pretense of taking her seriously as a martial artist.
When they were done, Akane was soaked in sweat and Ranma was barely flushed.
“Thanks for actually giving me a chance to land a hit. I’m going to hit the bath.”
“You know if you tried to use less power when you punch and kick, you’d give yourself a chance to build some control,” he offered. “You kind of slow down a bit to be more precise and with practice you speed up.”
She frowned, “Slow down to speed up?”
“Pretty much. Takes practice though.”
“I’ll give it a try,” she smiled. “Thank you. I’m going to go wash up.”
“No problem,” he smiled. He watched as she turned to leave. That could not be it. He needed more time with her. He was not ready for her to leave home and go to college. To leave him behind. “Hey! What are you doing after you clean up?”
“Packing up what’s left of my clothes.”
“Do you need help?”
“Not really,” she shrugged, but the look on his face gave her pause. Gone was all the traces of mockery and the prideful manner of the past week. “But you can hang out in my room while I pack. If you want.”
His face brightened, “Okay.”
In less than thirty minutes, Ranma was lying on his back, across the rug of Akane’s room and was pretending to read a manga. Akane was folding clothes on her bed and placing them into a suitcase. Ranma turned his head away from the manga that he was making no effort to read and watched Akane pack her clothes meticulously. He smiled lightly. She did love clothes and they way she enjoyed putting her outfits together made her look….cute.
“Akane?”
“Yeah?”
“Are you a little sad about moving out?” Ranma asked.
He did not say aloud……..Are you sad to be leaving me?
“Of course. I’m going to miss living at home, but it feels like it’s time for me to grow up a bit. I’m going to miss seeing Dad, Nabiki, and Kasumi everyday.” She looked back down at her clothes and began folding again. It was quiet for a long moment.
“What about me?”
She looked up surprised, “What about you?”
His face flushed brightly, “Will you miss me?”
Akane looked conflicted, like she was trying to decide between two distinct answers. She gave a half smile trimmed with regret but gave the honest answer, “Of course I’m going to miss you.”
The blush across his face darkened. Ranma cleared his throat and switched tracks completely, “Are you liking your college classes?”
Akane quit folding and moved to sit on her carpet, her back against the bed near Ranma’s feet. “So far. I’m only taking two summer classes, but they’ve been really interesting!”
Ranma continued to ask questions about her new job, her classes, and what she thought of the university. He wanted to know. He needed to know. In less than thirty six hours, he would be on the road with his father. Each step would take him further away from Nerima and further from her. He was desperate to know as much as he could about her new life before he left. When he returned, he did not want her to feel like a stranger to him. The fear that she would be too far from him to reach anymore.
He watched her. She was so excited, her face lighting up as she talked about the new job and the students she was meeting. University was the right place for Akane, and he wanted her to have everything she wanted. He could not ignore how what she wanted was moving her further from him. He hated it. For so long, he had travelled in her orbit, rotating around her and her world. It was that gravitational pull he always felt when she was near. Knowing they would be separated, made him feel adrift. Just like center of his universe was being pulled from his grasp.
“How about you?”
“Huh?”
“What’s your plan for the training trip?” Akane looked at him with those big brown eyes.
“Oh….uh….China for sure.”
Akane frowned, “How long do you think you’ll be gone?”
“A few months easily. Maybe longer. Hard to say.”
A blush began to grow in Akane’s cheeks, “Will you miss me?”
His breath caught. It was her tone. The same tone she had used on the night of the graduation party. He felt the muscles around his heart ease. An impulse grew and then burst in his mind. He acted without thinking. He sat up, grabbed her wrist, and pulled her to the floor. She was then on her back, lying parallel to him.
“Take a rest, Akane. You’ve been working too hard.”
She turned her head towards him, the beginning of anger growing in her expression, “What are you doing?”
“Getting you to rest.” He turned his head to her and stretched out his hand. He took his fingers and slid them in between the fingers on her own hand. He slowly, slower than he would have thought, began to move his extended fingers in a caress between her own. He looked into her eyes, confusion and maybe hope growing there. Her eyes became gentle and the intensity in them softened. A small breath came through her parted lips and he continued to move his fingers along the insides of her small fingers.
He could not stop looking at her. The always present gravitational force pulling him to her, “Of course I’ll miss you,” he replied gently, parroting her words.
For a moment, it felt like time had begun to crawl. There was nothing in this world beyond the two of them and this moment. He could feel his central nervous system liquify into the floor. He looked at her, all tenderness, and she looked at him with such softness. His hand stilled and slowly traveled to her wrist. He gently wrapped his hand around her wrist. At the pad of his thumb, he could feel her pulse. Slow and steady. Could he ever forget what a miracle that pulse was?
The memory was so terrifying. So vivid. To remember the long silence when she had no pulse. Those terrible minutes when not a single atom in her body moved…..when it all came to a complete and appalling stop. A complete slack of her muscles and nothing but a blank expression of her face. When he had lost her, truly lost her, and the knowing that nothing was ever going to be okay without her. The years stretching and growing thin with the utter loss of it all. And then…a reversal. Breath and a pulse and movement and words. She had come back to him.
He stopped breathing for a second, the memory thick with its intensity. Still, she was here with those eyes. Eyes that were locked on his own. Eyes that were not able to lie as easily as her mouth could. The emotions were there. He wondered if she could see a reflection of his own feelings in his gaze.
A second memory. The day they left Ryugenzawa. He was feeling unsettled. Such conflicting emotions, complete relief that she was going home with him and discomfort in knowing that he had almost lost her to another boy. There had never been real competition for her before, and being confronted with another martial artist that had no trouble showing her affection and using soft words, shook him more than he thought possible. He so desperately wanted to tell her that he was relieved, that he would try his best to be kind, and more than anything he wanted to hold her hand.
I’m happiest when I’m with you like this.
And in this moment, he was at his happiest. His hand remained around her wrist, his thumb gently caressing the crease below her wrist. This felt perfect. This felt like the right way to spend time before they had to part ways for a bit. He kept looking at her and she at him. Was this enough? Could he bring himself to push past the fear and try for more? Touch her hair maybe or brush his hand against her cheek. He rolled onto his side to face her and let go of her wrist. He began to extend his tremoring hand towards her and he could hear her suck in a breath.
“Akane. Ranma. Time for dinner,” Kasumi called from the bottom of the steps.
The two teens pulled apart swiftly and sat up, both breathing rather heavily.
“I’ll be right down Kasumi!” Akane responded.
They stood and looked at each other for a moment, both red in face and unsure how to explain what had just happened for the last few minutes.
“Um, I guess I’ll go down first,” Akane prompted, rubbing the back of her neck.
“Sure.” He twiddled his thumbs, looking every possible place in the room…everywhere but her. “Um…do you…do you need more help packing? You know, when dinner’s done.”
She looked down at the floor, flushed terribly, but smiled, “I think I do.”
“Okay then,” he smiled lightly.
Akane nodded silently and then walked out the door. He headed down after her ten seconds later, running and jumping past several steps. He sat at the table and tried his best to avoid Akane’s gaze but she was looking directly at the table. He hoped that they were not acting suspicious, tipping off the family that there had been a quiet moment of intimacy between the two.
Dinner proceeded as it typically did. Genma attempted to steal Ranma’s food, the routine chopstick battle, Nabiki speaking about university, Kasumi listening patiently to multiple conversations happening at the same time, Akane observing it all and looking a little sad to be leaving the chaos, and Soun waxing on about Akane’s final night in the home.
“It’s just so hard to let my little girls go,” he wept.
“Daddy, I’ll be a thirty minute train ride away. I’ll visit home all the time.”
“I know, but it won’t be the same. You’re my last little girl, Akane.”
“Oh, Ranma,” Kasumi began, “Are you still willing to help me and Daddy move Akane into her new apartment tomorrow morning?”
“Sure,” he responded, his mouth full of noodles.
Nabiki chimed in, “Glad to see your table manners haven’t improved in my absence, Ranma.”
Genma held up a sign. I tried my best to teach him.
Ranma let out an audible guffaw, “You tried to teach me table manners?”
The constant disrespect, Genma’s sign read.
“Hey, Ranma. When are you leaving on this grand training trip?” Nabiki asked in a droll tone.
“We’re leaving the day after Akane moves out. Probably before sunrise.”
Nabiki smirked and fixed him with an intense gaze, placing her head in her palm, “Have you given Akane a proper goodbye yet?”
He suddenly felt incredibly hot as though his face was on fire. He felt thick layer of embarrassment. Had Nabiki been spying on he and Akane before dinner? He was mortified and needed the subject to change, immediately. In his usual fashion, his mouth could formulate words faster than the brain. “Why would I worry about giving an uncute tomboy a proper goodbye?” His tone was flippant, as if saying a goodbye was not even an after thought.
Then, immediate regret. He turned to Akane and her eyes were burning and fixed to her food. He could feel the anger radiating from her. He wanted to take it back. Tell her he did not mean a word of it. Sure his words carried a heavier weight and a sharper point after what they had shared just a few minutes ago.
“Hm,” Nabiki responded. “Well, since you don’t care, I suppose it’s a good thing Akane had a date the other day.”
“NABIKI!” Akane cried out.
Ranma felt pressure rise and grow in his head and every muscle tense. His brow furrowed as he turned to look at Akane, “A date? With….a boy?” His words came out low, unmistakably angry.
“It wasn’t a date,” she looked away from him.
“Fine. Then tell me more about this not date,” he practically growled. The anger, the feeling of betrayal…..the hurt….it was written all over him.
He could see the panic in Akane’s face. She looked like a trapped animal. Before he could get another word out, Akane grabbed a glass of drinking water and chucked the water in his face. The transformation into his female form was instant. Akane dropped the glass and took off running up the steps.
Ranma ran to grab the kettle of hot water from the stove that Kasumi kept warm for these random moments. He poured it over his head, ignoring the burn running down his head and back. Then he ran in pursuit up the steps and caught up to her quickly.
“You went on a date,” he accused and grabbed her elbow, careful not to use force despite the anger that felt like it was gnawing on his stomach lining.
“It wasn’t a date!”
“You’re a two timer,” he spat back at her.
She pulled her elbow from his hand, frowning at him and his accusation, “You go on dates all the time with Shampoo and Ukyo.” She turned and continued at top speed to her room with Ranma right at her heels. When they reached her room, Ranma slammed her door behind him.
“We’re not talking about me right now!”
Akane’s face had turned a bright shade a crimson, her own fury building. “First of all, it wasn’t a date. Second of all, how come it’s fine for you to go on dates but not me? How is that fair?”
Ranma clenched his fists, “I don’t go on dates with Ukyo and Shampoo. You know I go to get food.”
“Do you spend time with them?”
“Yes,” he ground out.
“Are you technically engaged to them?”
He clenched his fists, “Yes, but it’s not my fault.”
“Then it’s a date!” She flung her arms into the air with sharp movement, still stupefied that he could not see it. “So before you call me a two timer, you need to think about what a stupid double standard you’re holding me to.”
He paused. She was not wrong, but he did not want to think about that right now. The jealously was too much. He could feel it driving the anger, consuming rational thought, and making him want to say truly cruel things to her. To hurt her in the way she had just hurt him. The words were there, with all the righteous anger swirling in his body, but the feelings of hurt and betrayal were increasing. Ranma could feel a sinking feeling in his stomach and tension across his heart. He could not stop his next words.
“You said you loved me,” his body slumped.
Akane bristled, “I said I like you.”
“That’s not what you meant,” he hissed back.
Akane sunk to her bed and sighed. She sat on the edge of the bed and placed her head in her hands. When she looked up, he was still standing a few feet away from her, looking dejected. “It wasn’t a date. I don’t know why Nabiki called it that. It was just a stupid boy that asked me to go get tea with him. He’s trying to meet new friends. That’s it, Ranma. Nothing happened.”
Her words did nothing to make him feel better. She had tea with another boy. Probably a smarter boy who could talk about stupid books and stupid ideas and other stupid school things. There was no way in hell this boy only wanted to her friend. As if he had not seen dozens of boys trying to impress her and flirt with her.
His tone was still accusatory, “Then why didn’t you tell me about it?”
“I didn’t think you’d care,” she said flatly.
He felt the anger again rise through the feelings of rejection, “You didn’t think I’d care?” He was yelling again.
“No,” she responded. She sounded eerily calm despite his yelling.
“What do you mean no?” He barked back at her.
She shrugged and her face looked as though she were struggling to find the right words. Her face began to turn red again and her eyes flashed. “I didn’t….after this week….I just……I just didn’t think you’d care,” she finished lamely.
“Wouldn’t care?”
“Wouldn’t care if we did our own things,” she whispered.
“Break the engagement you mean!”
Akane frowned heavily, “I didn’t say that. But with the way you’ve been acting I figured it was time for me to give up.”
“Give up?” his voice was much higher than he intended. “How have I been acting?”
She looked at her floor and her lip trembled, “You’ve been awful, Ranma.” The tears were forming in her eyes. “I told you how I feel and you’ve done nothing but make fun of me all week.”
He unraveled at her tears, never having been comfortable when a girl cried, especially Akane….especially when he was the cause. “Make fun of you?”
“You know….all of the teasing and bringing up how I feel.” The tears did begin to fall down her cheeks and her lips quivered. “You….you made a point to call me jealous when you spent time with Ukyo….and you pestered me about Shampoo.” She paused and took a deep breath. “You just kept on about it all week. And not once…..did you ever say…..that you cared about me at all.” She kept pausing, trying to keep any composure and not dissolve into a sobbing mess. Still, the sob that she had been trying to contain found its way out of her mouth and she viciously swiped the tears at her cheek.
Then silence. He wanted to hug her and tell her that he did care, more than cared, but the fear. It was there, pressing on his chest, inching its way through his body.
And the fear won.
“You just told me you liked me so I’d tell you the same,” he said stubbornly, trying desperately to change the line of the conversation. Steer it away from his wrongdoings.
She looked up at him through her tears, baffled, “Well, yeah. I wasn’t trying to trick you, but when you tell someone you like them, you hope they like you back.”
“I wasn’t making fun of you,” he whispered.
“Then what were you doing?”
Ranma groaned, “I don’t know. It was just teasing. I wasn’t trying to hurt your feelings.” He rubbed the back of his neck.
“Just because you don’t mean to hurt my feelings, doesn’t mean that you don’t.” Her voice was soft, but firm, honest.
Ranma had everything to say, and somehow he had nothing to say. She was here, again admitting that she cared for him, and he could not conjure up a single word. He felt guilt added to the odd cocktail of emotions he was experiencing.
Akane waited, trying to be patient as she hoped for some type of response. She gave him so much time but the quiet continued to lengthen. A few times he looked as though he was going to try to say something, anything, but eventually he just held his head down.
Ranma finally looked up at her, hoping she would break the silence. The crying had slowed, but her eyes were red and swollen. She looked tired, like the fatigue had settled into her bones and onto her heart.
“Look, Ranma,” she exhaled deeply, “I don’t know what is going on in your head, but this feels like it’s some kind of game to you.” She stopped, considering her next words. “It feels like you’re laughing at me, and I don’t want to play anymore.”
“What’re you saying?” Ranma frowned.
Akane took and deep breath, pausing before selecting her next words, “It kind of feels like you’ve shown me how you feel about me. You know, with how you’ve acted since the party.” She paused again, thinking. “I think you’re mad right now because you feel like you’re losing the game since I hung out with another guy. But, if you’re honest with yourself, I don’t really think……..I’m…..I’m not the prize you want to win, Ranma.”
He had no response, completely stunned.
“I think you just hate to lose,” she sucked in her lips. “And if this a game to you…….”
She stood from the bed and moved closer to him. She reached out her hand and placed it on his shoulder, forcing eye contact with him, “If this is all a game, like I think it is, and you don’t care….then just let me go.” She dropped her arm to her side and looked to the floor. Her eyes began to glaze with tears again, and she wiped her cheek with her index finger.
Ranma stood there, unable to look at her, feeling so close in proximity but so far from her. He could reach his hand out again, take her wrist and feel her heart beat under her skin but the silence expanded, sucking any trace of bravery he hoped to summon. All that was left was the biting fear.
Akane bit her lip, waiting for any response, and when there was none and he continued to hang his head low, she spoke. “You should go. I’m tired.” She turned away from him and with no other option, Ranma left the room.
*************
If this is all a game, like I think it is, and you don’t care, then just let me go.
“Dammit,” he cursed to the sky.
He sat on his thinking spot on the roof and sunk his head between his legs. How did they end up here? Just three hours ago, they were lying on her rug, staring at one another and touching one another. Now, he was alone on the roof. He sat there, stewing in the hurt and anger.
How could she go out with another guy? Sit across from another guy. Maybe let this guy stroke her hand or kiss him at the end of the date. With all that had happened between them….the looks, the words, all the time they spent together, sitting next to her at dinner every night….her dying for him and he almost dying for her, how could she consider spending time with another guy? His thoughts continued to spiral, growing more frustrated and feeling more sick with each passing second.
He felt a hard slap to the back of his head, “Hiding away up here?” Ryoga moved to his side and sat down at the peak of the roof.
Ranma scowled. The last thing he needed in this moment was Ryoga. “You here to sleep with Akane on her final night here, P-Chan?”
Ryoga growled, “You’re an idiot.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“And no, I’m just crashing here for a day or two before Akari and I head back to her families’ farm. I’m committed to her, Ranma. I’ve given up my pursuit of Akane.”
“Yeah right. You’d jump at the chance to be with Akane.”
Ryoga flushed, “I’ll always love Akane despite my love for Akari.
“You’re such an ass, Ryoga.”
“And you’re a fool! Treating Akane the way you have. It’s shameful.” Ryoga nearly hissed at him and punched the top of his head again.
Ranma’s head whipped around to him, “Who told you about that?”
“Nabiki,” he responded. “She filled me in. I don’t think she likes the way you’ve been treating Akane. She offered to take several thousand yen off my debt if I beat the crap out of you. She’s a scary person to have against you, Ranma.”
Ranma frowned, “I know.” He had been on the receiving end of Nabiki’s wrath before. It had usually left him broke or resulted in public embarrassment.
“Either way, I am going to beat you for the way you’ve treated poor Akane.”
“Give it a rest. I’m in no mood,” Ranma growled.
“Then explain to me. Why are you being so horrible to her? We both know how you feel.”
Ranma rolled his eyes, “I couldn’t care less about that macho chick.”
Ryoga frowned, “I was at Jusenkyo you idiot! I saw you go catatonic when we all thought she died. You would’ve died if I hadn’t saved you for Akane’s sake. And don’t think I didn’t hear you scream and beg her to come back. Trust me, you’ve shown me exactly how you feel about her.”
Ranma winced. The horrible memory wrapped its path around his frontal cortex. He watched her disappear into what he thought was nothingness. Her clothes drifting in the air, down into his arms. He remembered nothing after that until the Jusenkyo guide took her clothes from him. He had to be told about how Ryoga had pulled him to safety and carried him back to the guide’s house.
He only had memories of being surrounded by a thick cloud of gray. He believed he heard the sound of water lapping against land, but all he could see was the unending layers of gray all around him. He felt numb. He felt intense grief. He felt completely empty and alone. She was gone and had taken every good thing with her.
He pulled his arms around his legs, trying his best to move his focus away from the memory, “Enough. I remember,” he answered, his voice gruff.
“Then why? Why treat her so poorly?”
Ranma sighed. There was no simple answer to that question. The truth was that he did not mean to treat her poorly. He had honestly thought of it as teasing, continuing the love battle they had engaged in for so long, but there was more. A much more complicated, knotted up, difficult answer.
I could lose her.
The Ranma before Jusenkyo realized her could lose her to another boy if he were not careful with her, but the Ranma after Jusenkyo knew precisely what it felt like to lose her. It had wrecked him, opened his insides, and left him destroyed. And there were just so many ways he could lose her. She could outright refuse his feelings. She could get mad at him when he inevitably stuck his foot in his mouth and break up with him. She could meet a better, smarter boy. She could get hit by a car. She could be kidnapped. She could be killed. He had seen it. He had felt it. He had held her lifeless body in his own two hands.
I could so easily lose her.
Ranma sighed and stuck with the easiest answer, “I didn’t mean to. I was just doing what we do. You know, fighting. Teasing.”
“How could you be so careless? You can’t just tease someone about caring for you.” He punched the back of his head a third time.
“Well now I know!”
“You felt like you had won didn’t you?” Ryoga questioned, pulling from the commonality that he shared with Ranma, two boys that had spent the majority of their lives focused on being the very best at the martial arts.
“Kind of. I felt happy, and that’s just what we do. We’ve been trying to get each other to confess for a while, and yeah, it felt like I had won.” He twiddled his thumbs together.
“I’m a martial artist too. I know the intense desire to win, but not everything is a battle.” Ryoga sighed, “She’s a girl with feelings and a heart. A heart that it appears you have broken.”
Ranma just stared.
“Akane is the one of the kindest people I have ever met. You could live a thousand lives and not deserve her, but she has chosen you.” Ryoga let out a large breath, “She’s yours to lose, Ranma, and you’re throwing her away with both hands.”
Ryoga then stood and walked to the edge of the roof. He paused and clenched his fist. “I’m going to the dojo to train. Feel free to join me if you want a fight. I owe you a few bruises for the way you’ve treated Akane.”
Ranma laid back on the roof and took a deep breath. Ryoga’s words did nothing to settle his already stressed mind. The emotions were still there and pressing upon his brain, throat, stomach, and heart. Maybe a fight in the dojo would settle him. It usually did. He sighed deeply and pulled himself up. He jumped off the roof and headed towards the dojo. He was prepared to fight Ryoga until he could at least shave the sharper edges off this onslaught of feelings.
*****
It was midday and Soun, Kasumi, and Ranma were all bringing boxes up to the third floor of Akane’s small apartment. He had wanted to make an excuse and get out of helping her move. He had a legitimate reason. He and Ryoga fought in the dojo until dawn began to claim the sky. He had thrown all his energy and emotions into that fight and hoped for some kind of equilibrium before he had to tell her goodbye. He was exhausted.
Akane.
He had been staring at her since they had left the Tendo home. She was sticking close to Kasumi and Soun and was avoiding him. Akane had been holding her father’s hand through much of the moving process while he cried and wailed.
“My last daughter leaving home!”
“Daddy, I’ll be visiting so often it will be like I never left.” She squeezed his hand. “Promise.”
Kasumi rubbed Soun’s back, “She’s not really leaving, Daddy. Akane is just a train ride away.”
Ranma was left to lift most of the boxes while the Tendos were dealing with Soun’s fragile emotional state. He did not mind and it gave him something to do other than stare at Akane. She had worn a simple striped t-shirt, jeans, and sneakers, probably trying to be comfortable while getting her belongings settled. She looked just how she always looked, but knowing that he would not see her for months made her look….perfect.
He wanted to speak to her, but there were things to do and he could not think of the just right words that might fix what had happened between them. He kept running words in his brain, rearranging them and then substituting different words. Which words would make it better and fix the hurt and betrayal he felt? Which words could he say to help her understand that he did care. He passed her in the hall as she balanced two boxes in her arms and headed down to grab another box.
When he returned up the steps with a heavy box of books, Akane was in the hall but not moving. She was standing with her upper back leaning against the wall and there was a boy. He had his arm extended against the wall right over her shoulder. He was leaning into her body, eyes looking down at her, and a flirtatious smirk on his face.
Ranma felt his hands tense into fists and his blood pressure spike. Who was this boy to lean into his fiancée’s personal space, clearly flirting with her? He looked to Akane whose expression was one of annoyance. He immediately shifted the box to one arm and approached the two. He grabbed the boy by the collar and pulled him backwards, with a bit more force than necessary, and then fixed him with a glare.
“She’s engaged. To me,” he stated flatly. “Why don’t you find someone else to flirt with?”
The boy immediately threw both palms in the air and began to back away, “I was just saying hi. No harm done.” He then turned and walked rather quickly to a room further down the hall.
Ranma arched an eyebrow and turned to Akane.
She frowned, “What was that for?”
“You looked annoyed. I took care of it.” He walked through the door of her apartment and set the box down.
“I was about to take care of it, but he’s my neighbor. I didn’t want to be rude about it.” She crossed her arms. “I’ve got to live in the same building as that guy.”
“Geez. You’re here for 5 minutes and you’re already flirting and got guys falling at your feet.”
Her frowned deepened and she pinched the bridge of her nose as though she had the beginning of a terrible headache, “Stop being an idiot. Let’s go get the last of the boxes.”
She swept past him and out the door. Soun and Kasumi were walking in, each with a box in hand. “There’s only a few left. The two of you should be able to bring up the last of it,” Kasumi said.
Akane and Ranma went and got the last of the boxes and carried them up in a silence so deafening that Ranma felt a sick feeling growing in his gut. Had he just messed up his last chance to fix things?
They stayed a bit longer in the apartment sorting the boxes to give Akane a jump in unpacking. Soun continued to blubber in a corner while Kasumi helped to organize and delegate what needed to be done.
“I think that’s good,” Akane smiled at Kasumi. “I think I can take it from here.”
Kasumi smiled back, “We’re all so proud of you, Akane.” She pulled Akane to her and gave her a firm hug. “I’ll stop by with some food in a few days.”
“Thank you.”
Kasumi and Akane moved to the corner and pulled Soun into a standing position. Akane hugged him. Ranma watched as Akane wrapped her arms around him.
“Thank you, Daddy, for everything. I couldn’t have done any of this if it weren’t for you.”
“My baby girl! My last baby,” he continued to bawl.
“Okay, Daddy,” Kasumi interrupted. “I think we should head home. Give Akane some time to get everything organized.”
Soun nodded, “Of course.” Tears still flowed from his eyes. “It’s time to let you spread your wings, Akane. I love you.” He gave Akane one final, prolonged hug. Ranma turned his eyes away. It felt weird to be so open with family affections, never having received that kind of outward expressions of love from Genma.
“I love you too.” Akane squeezed Soun in return.
Soun gently ended the hug and then smiled down at her, “Let’s head home. He nodded at Kasumi and Ranma. “Kasumi, let’s head down to the car. Give the kids a chance to say goodbye.”
Ranma watched Kasumi and Soun walk through the door. He turned to look at Akane and she was looking directly at the floor. He had to fix this and now was the moment. He had tried and failed all morning to fashion some words into something that would mend this distance before it grew beyond his ability to remedy.
Akane was still across the room and looked anywhere but him. He moved closer to her. He wanted to grab her hands. He wanted to hug her. He wanted to kiss her and promise her that she was the only girl for him, always had been. He had never taken the prospect of a marriage to Shampoo, Ukyo, or Kodachi seriously. It had always been her, only her. He wanted to say what he had thought at Jusenkyo. He loved her. Needed her. Craved her presence and closeness. He was closer now and could say any of these things, but the fear.
I could lose her.
His face was flushed as he struggled with what to do. He would not see her for months. This painful realization hit him and he looked at her face, the downcast lashes, her cheeks, her mouth, the line of her jaw. She was beautiful. He was a coward. He could have said she was beautiful a million times, but the fear was always stronger than his determination.
Akane’s shoulders slumped as the silence grew. She felt defeated, looked defeated. She crossed her arms at her stomach as though she wanted to protect herself from the pain of this very moment. She finally looked up into his blue eyes, eyes that seemed to be transfixed upon her face.
“So you’re leaving tomorrow morning?”
Ranma rubbed that back of his head, “Yeah. Before the sun comes up.”
She walked to the door of the apartment and he followed. She opened it. She stood on one side and Ranma stepped through the door frame.
“Good luck, Ranma,” she smiled but it was tight and reached no other part of her face.
He took a deep breath and frowned at her words. She had wished him luck but the meaning did not match her tone. Something in that tone grabbed his heart and twisted it painfully. It felt for one moment that his heart took a pause and he could not breathe.
“Good luck, Akane.”
She waited a moment more and then softly closed the door. He stood there for a few moments, wandering if he knocked if she would open the door and hear his words. Still, the words were not there, but the fear was. He pushed his hands into his pocket and felt the emotions take hold again. The fear, the loss. He slowly turned and walked away.
Behind the door, Akane waited. Waited for the sound of his footsteps as they moved further away. When she could no longer hear him, the tears came, hot and thick. She slid down the door, sitting on the floor. She covered her eyes with her palms and sobbed like her heart had just been broken. Because, in every way that mattered, it had.