Chapter Text
10 years later - present, now
Youngjae, being a successful singer, never even thought about dating. Many people would ask him out but he never saw the point in that. He liked staying alone in his house, writing songs for himself and sometimes other artists. It was quiet, enjoyable and didn't require much of an effort. He did have fans, not on idol level of course, but he did have his fanbase and they weren't invasive, so he really enjoyed what he was doing. Going on concerts around Korea and Japan, singing in streets, in some events, on weddings that was his thing and dating, it wasn't even on his mind, it was a long forgotten thing he once longed for and maybe never will.
The only people he liked to go out with were his brother and his husband or Kyungmin and Hanjin, his best friends. They stayed by his side through everything, times when he just wanted to give up, when he saw Jihoon and Dohoon together, when he thought he was just a burden to them so he distanced himself, they stayed through all of that with him and he cherished them more than anyone.
His days were usually boring, getting up, doing nothing in particular, eating and writing when he had the motivation to. His fans weren't the pressuring type so he liked to take his sweet time with making songs.
Thankfully he had not chosen the idol path which meant he has a lot of freedom to talk about relationships with his fans or on interviews, but mostly it's nothing fun because he never had anything real, well except for something he thought was real, but public had never heard it so he was often characterised as boring by his fans.
He rarely talked about him to the public, only mentioning that his first love ended up tragically, that's the only thing they knew and he liked it that way. He never went into too much detail about Jihoon because to this day, the memory of their last meeting still hurts deep.
One time he even saw a post that made him unsure if he wanted to cry or laugh.
@dohoonarmvein
i lwk ship choi youngjae with han jihoon. hear me out on this one, they're both the same age, one is a singer the other is a dancer, they're both not too popular so the audience doesn't care if they date or not, and they both attended the same high school so they probably know eachother.
He just bookmarked that post not knowing what else to do. He missed Jihoon badly, even after 10 years of not seeing him, he sometimes wished that he could teleport to himself 10 years ago and stop his jealousy, he didn't care if jihoon wasn't with him, he wanted jihoon, as a friend if he couldn't have him as his boyfriend, but now he doesn't have him either way. And to this day that thought ate him alive.
…
It was a gloomy yet hot day which Youngjae didn’t like at all. He avoided going out on these days but today was an exemption. He was meeting with Hanjin and Kyungmin for their 2 year marriage anniversary so he couldn’t miss it. He got dressed as finely as he could without overdoing it and headed for the door.
Funnily enough he still lived in the same house he did 10 years ago but the only difference was that now it was completely his, he didn’t share it with anyone.
The meet up place was this restaurant in the eastern part of the city which Youngjae liked very much, mostly because there weren't many people. The only flaw was that it was located right next to a dance studio which would always result in his stomach feeling heavy at the thought of seeing Jihoon. But he never actually saw Jihoon so for the first time in many years he went to the restaurant feeling completely relaxed.
“Youngjae!” Hanjin called out, hand in hand with Kyungmin. “Hanjin!” He yelled back, running to them with his full strength. “Oh i missed you two so much” he said as he continued hugging them. “Shall we head inside?” Hanjin asked and they all followed him.
“How has your life been?” Kyungmin asked after they placed their orders. “Nothing much, I've been singing across Japan and now i’m back in Korea. You?” “We’ve been traveling around Asia for a bit and decided to take a little break so we can meet you here!” Kyungmin said, his eyes still sparkling the same even after 10 years. Hearing Kyungmin’s words, he didn’t get envious, he was very happy for them. “I’m genuinely happy for you two, i really wish nothing ever separates you two” he said, looking proudly at them. After that the conversation flowed comfortably, Kyungmin talked mostly and the older just listened to him like they always did. Some old memories were brought up that earned a laugh from Youngjae and before they knew it, it was time to say goodbye.
“It was really nice seeing you again Youngjae, let’s meet again soon!” Hanjin said and left into the parking lot with Kyungmin. Youngjae looked around the streets seeing unfamiliar faces and happy couples walking around with their dogs. They all looked so happy with eachother and Youngjae couldn’t help but feel jealous at that. He always believed in love but even now, at the age of 28, he had never had anyone, he was always that friend who would come alone to everything and with the slightest sliver of hope he stayed here, near the dance studios in hopes of seeing his first and current love - Han Jihoon.
…
Two hours passed and nobody went nor left the studio, cursing under his breath he took his car keys ready to leave when he heard a voice too familiar not to recognise. “Youngjae!” he didn’t even need to turn around to figure out who the voice belonged to. 12 years of constantly hearing that yell made it etched into his brain like the most precious thing ever. It was unmistakably Han Jihoon’s voice and Youngjae didn’t know what to do, run, cry, laugh or approach Jihoon. He just stayed still until he felt a hand grab his wrist and turn him around with little force.
Han Jihoon still looked gorgeous as ever, except he had brown hair now. His eyes still held stars like they did 10 years ago and his smile still rivaled the sun exactly like 10 years ago. Youngjae just stared at him, not knowing what the fuck he will do. “J-j-jihoon?” he asked slowly, his voice crumbling. “I didn’t expect to see you here!” Jihoon said with a smile. But the only thing youngjae could think about was how and why he was smiling when our last meeting was the most painful thing in the world. As much as he wanted to, he couldn’t return the smile, it was too painful for him to do it. “What are you doing here?” Jihoon asked, his voice still carrying that childlike tone Youngjae liked. “Nothing special, i was out with friends and we stopped by here to eat.” He said even though he knew Jihoon knew who Hanjin and Kyungmin were.
“That’s nice! You know Youngjae, we should catch up soon” Jihoon said, offering his phone. Youngjae looked at it for a moment and said “what?” “I’m giving you my number silly!” Jihoon said, shining brightly as always. “Oh, here” They quickly exchanged numbers and Youngjae left as fast as he could. He got into his car and immediately started sobbing, how ironic, he thought. Jihoon still made him sob even after 10 whole years. He was still that same teenager in love, nothing ever changed.
…
He barged through the door and called Junghwan immediately.
“Hey Youngjae, what's up?” Junghwan asked, sounding cheerful. “Drop the cheery tone hyung, I saw Jihoon today” youngjae said and just heard silence from the other end. He almost thought Junghwan hung up but then the loudest laugh ever escaped Junghwan. “IT'S NOT FUNNY!” Youngjae yelled into the phone and hung up.
1 month later
jihoon:
hello
it’s me
Youngjae knew it was Jihoon but he still decided to fuck with him a little.
youngjae:
who's your bias I'm your bias who's your bias I'm your bias who's your bias I'm your bias, it's me
please clarify who you are I don't know who “me” is
jihoon:
still funny as always
it's jihoon
youngjae:
okay jihoon
i don't know what jihoon are you, i had many friends named jihoon
park jihoon?
lee jihoon?
kim jihoon?
jihoon:
han jihoon
youngjae:
ohhhh that jihoon
Mr. han jihoon please come to our usual hang out spot in 30 minutes. I won't wait for a minute.
jihoon:
oki
The old pizzeria near their high school was still open, same workers, same interior, exterior, everything stayed the same, even the owner was still there. He didn't seem to remember Youngjae but that was okay. He sat at their usual table and waited, even though he said he wouldn't.
Jihoon came in with a smile that immediately lit up the whole place. “Thought you said you wouldn't wait for me” he said, a chuckle escaping him. “There are exceptions” youngjae said, feeling like himself 10 years ago. “So mister Kim Youngjae, why did you call me here?” Jihoon said, in his best professional tone. “Well mister Han Jihoon, you said that you wanted to catch up and I'm doing exactly that.” Youngjae said.
Jihoon spoke and the atmosphere suddenly changed. “You know, your words 10 years ago stuck with me even to this day. I in fact did not make the right choice and it was my deepest regret. Dohoon is truly a great guy but dating him, I realised something painful, he wasn't you, he wasn't Choi Youngjae, he was just someone ordinary, he wasn't you and all the other people i dated, they were never you. Every year on 31st May i wanted to reach out, to tell you how much i missed you, to tell you how wrong i was about everything but, i couldn't, i couldn't bring myself to look you in your eyes after i hurt you for a month straight so I just stayed hiding like a coward until i saw you again one month ago.” And Jihoon just stopped, ugly sobs took over him as he started shaking. Youngjae knew the regret and the apology sounded genuine so even after everything, seeing Jihoon like made his chest tighten.
“Don't cry Jihoonie, don't cry please.” That only made Jihoon cry harder. “I don't deserve a person like you Youngjae, i never deserved you, maybe that's why the universe chose different paths for us.” Jihoon's eyes were red with tears as he chose his words. But Youngjae never felt angry at Jihoon, he always felt jealous and that was the worst part of everything.
Youngjae finally spoke, low and controlled. “Jihoon, it wasn't you who was at fault, it was me. I couldn't put aside my jealousy and be genuinely happy for you. I felt so jealous that i had many bad thoughts about Dohoon. I was insecure and stupid, because seeing you happy with someone else that wasn't me broke me, i don't know why. You had the right to like whoever you want and i made you feel bad because of it, sorry.”
Jihoon spoke again, his voice still shaky. “I'm sorry Youngjae, i really am, i don't know if we'll ever be able to be as close as we were but i just wish we start talking again”
“Jihoon, listen to me now. An apology is already enough, you don't even know how much i missed you silly” youngjae said, finally a big smile showing on his face.
“It was so nice seeing you again, tomorrow at the same place?” “Gladly” Jihoon said and hugged Youngjae as tightly as he could.
epilogue<3
Famous singer Choi Youngjae and dancer Han Jihoon seen hugging near 247 pizzeria. Was this just a hang out or something more?
@dohoonarmvein
I told yall, i knew there was something between them, anyways our youngjae congratulations on your relationship
@choiyoungjae
thank you ^^
@dohoonarmvein
OH MY?! I didn't even tag him?!
Youngjae looked at Jihoon across his room, showed him the phone and they both broke into a fit of laughter.