Chapter Text
You know, it wasn’t as easy as I thought it would be to cut you out of my life. Don’t get me wrong, I was angry. And it surprised no one. Lanie got it, the boys understood, and even my Captain, for once, was understanding when I told him why you had to leave. It didn’t matter how much the Mayor loved you, this time, you crossed a line. For a week, Lanie took me out after each shift. We cursed your name, drank my sorrows away, and vented. I got all my frustrations out regarding you. I felt free.
Then we had a case. A good case. One with a body in a freezer, secret identities, and sabotage. You would have loved it. And I kind of missed your crazy theories, and your insights. kind of. I was still angry. I still never wanted to see your face again. It wasn’t the same. Ryan tried to take on your role, coming up with theories that wouldn’t make sense even by your standards. Even Esposito was going nuts. I was kind of surprised he didn’t call you up just to make it stop. He wouldn’t betray my trust like that, though. He’d always have my back.
But then you came back. It was just one case, and yes, you were helpful, but I was still angry. You didn’t see the fallout. You didn’t care how what you found affected me, just that you found something. You only wanted the glory. But then, you came to me and apologized. A sincere apology. It was the last thing I expected, but I could tell you understood why you hurt me. And as you walked away, I realized something. You were respecting my wishes. You were ready to leave me alone forever. And in that whole time that we didn’t speak, you never tried to force your presence onto me. You weren’t pushy or impulsive. I don’t think you even texted me in that time period. That is what caused me to resume our partnership. I saw that after a betrayal like that, you were still capable of listening to me.
I tested you, you know. During our Strangers on a Train murder, I told you that it reminded me of my Mother’s case. You didn’t push. You let me lead that discussion, to choose how much Iwanted to say. It helped. I’m regaining some of my trust in you, Castle.
Don’t blow it, okay?
-Beckett