Chapter Text

Chapter IV: The Sound of a Beating Heart

Miku had always thought of gluttony as a useless sin— after all what could be so disastrous about overconsumption?

That was before she saw the banquet table that was set in the middle of the dining room. Just looking at all that food made her sick. All Miku could think about was the families in Varanyth, starving as shegot to experience their wildest dreams.

A life without hunger, without fear.

She had refused to eat from the table. Kaito had insisted she eat something but she lied saying she had something earlier that morning. Miku had survived longer without food before, she’d be fine.

Miku and Kaito stood on one of the balconies overlooking the ball room.

“Are you still sure you don’t want anything?” Kaito asked from her side, “I’d hate for you to starve while you’re here.”

“It’s alright, your highness.”

“Kaito,” A pause.

“It’s alright, Kaito.” Miku took a glance at the ballroom below her while fiddling with her gloves, the orchestra was playing once again.

Miku loved music when she was younger. At some point her dream was to become a singer, sharing her voice with the world. Even after she had been rescued by the order, she would hum tunes to herself; Short, upbeat melodies that made her little heart flutter. Miku would share them with Rin, and the two would be found singing together in between their training sessions. To this day music still brings a smile to Miku’s face, even though her dream had died a long, long time ago.

“Are you looking for your sister?” he asked. Miku hadn’t meant to— but she had to admit she missed Rin.

‘After this… After this I’ll be able to talk with her.’

“Yes, I’m worried she’s bored to death without me” she laughed, “At least she’ll have Luka to talk to….”

The orchestra continued onward, notes and rhythms practically floating through the air. It was a slow, calming song, but it brought no peace to her heart.

“I’ve heard about the… famine in the territories,” Kaito said, finally breaking the silence.

“The famines?” She said surprised, turning back to him. Why was he asking this? Surely he knew about the famines— right?

“Yes, and I wanted to ask you… how are the people being affected?”

Why was he asking this? Miku wasn’t supposed to bring up the famines, or anything at all. This was a mission, a simple mission. But still she needed to respond, something believable. “Rin’s mother…” She spoke carefully, “…was of lower status before she married my father. I’m sure they experienced much worse than I did.” It was a lie, of course. All of it was.

“What did you experience?”

“…”

“That’s not important,” she said quickly, trying to dismantle the whole conversation.

“I want to know, if you’re willing to tell me.” He seemed so genuine— as if he truly cared.

But Miku wasn’t supposed to mention the famines. She couldn’t let her perfectly crafted mask slip. But all the trapped, outraged feelings festering in her heart bubbled out of her throat before she knew what she was saying.

“It’s sick really, most people don’t have enough food to live through the winter, they have to resort to stealing, prostitution, murder!” She spat, gripping the bars to the balcony.

“It’s that bad…?”

“Yes!” She exclaimed, “I wish there was something— anything I could do about it.” The words finally finished escaping. Miku felt a bit lighter with them off her tongue.

“I feel that way too,” Kaito sighed. Miku turned, slightly taken aback.

“You’re the crowned prince, aren’t you the one person here who can do something about it?” she questioned bitterly, extending an arm towards the crowd below. Silence stretched on for a moment, a deafening silence that made time start to slow.

“You’re right,” he said “I should be doing something—“

“But you can’t?”

“But I can’t”

They said at the same time.

Miku let out a dry laugh, “Then we’re both trapped.”

She regretted her words just as quickly as she had spat them out. She wasn’t trapped. She knew what she was doing, Luka said it herself. Had it been a lie? No, no… Luka was right she could do this. She was an assassin for heaven's sake!

“Trapped in our respective roles?” He questioned.

“In a way….” she responded shakily, nodding her head. God, why was she thinking about this! She couldn’t care. It was Fate. She wouldn’t shed a single tear when the clock struck twelve.

So why was she crying now?

Miku hadn’t noticed them at first. Crystal drops streaming down her cheeks, falling onto her dress and leaving small puddles on the fabric like raindrops. She attempted to brush away the tears with her hands until she realized they were shaking as well.

“Oh god, I’m sorry I made you start crying!” Kaito exclaimed, cupping her cheek with his hand to brush away the tears.

“N— no it’s not your fa…“ She trailed off, the words catching in her throat as she sank to the ground. Miku sat there for what felt like forever; Long enough to forget that Kaito was right there, consoling her.

“My mother died in one of the famines,” she said in a hushed voice. For once she told the complete truth. Only silence came from Kaito, she knew that silence; Those moments where you wish so desperately you can help someone but you can’t.

How had she started crying? Had she been so overwhelmed? Was she so distracted she had let her mask slip? She needed help… she couldn’t go on like this or else she really wouldfail.

“Apologies!” She exclaimed while standing up, not even taking the time to wipe away her tears, “I haven’t talked to Rin or Luka all evening, they must be worried sick about me!” Miku forced a smile upon her face, like she always did.

“But how wil—“ Kaito started, hurriedly standing up.

“How about we meet here again when the clock strikes ten? Good? Good!” She finished quickly, rushing off before Kaito had the chance to respond.

“Um… Alright!” She heard Kaito call out as she made her escape. It wasn’t the best decision to run off, how would Miku explain to Luka that she had fled? No idea.

Miku glanced at the clock, nearly half an hour until ten o clock. Thirty minutes. Thirty minutes to get her head on straight. As she descended the stairs to the ground level of the ballroom, one of her glass heels slipped off her foot. She stepped back into the shoe.

This outfit was going to be the death of her.

The party was boring. That’s all Rin had picked up so far.

Well— in their defense the dancing was fun and the food was more than she’d had in the past ten years… but overall? Bor-ing. She missed the sense of freedom that coursed through her veins when she was training, even if the process was grueling.

And she hadn’t seen Miku the entire time! The one person who she could talk to was out of communication. Rin knew it was important for Miku to gain the prince's trust, but the feeling of being trapped in a ballroom with a bunch of nobles along with the fresh, powerful shadow of death looming over her if she made one wrong move? Not a pleasant feeling.

The ball still had the same atmosphere as when she first arrived. Nobles still stood in small groups, exchanging polite conversation. She glanced at the clock residing above her. It was strange… Rin was sure she could hear it— each tick, tick, tick, as the minute hand made its slow ascend getting closer and closer to twelve.

Rin abruptly stumbled forward, she had been pushed aside by someone—

“Oh, apologies!” A voice exclaimed from behind her. Rin turned to see a woman standing behind her. Her hair color of dead leaves, styled into a short, fashionable bun. Her dress was a deep red that eventually faded into a light pink at the bottom. She held a matching fan decorated with a pattern of golden roses. Her eyes gleamed with some sort of fiery emotion that Rin couldn’t read.

If it weren’t for the pleasant smile she wore on her face Rin was convinced this woman hated her with a burning passion.

“Oh no, it’s my fault Miss, I wasn’t paying attention to my surroundings,” Rin blurted.

“Do not worry young one, I take no offense!” The woman said cheerfully. “May I say, you look wonderful in that dress… for a second I thought you were royalty!" She said, twirling her fan in her left hand.

Rin shifted uncomfortably holding up a piece of the silver fabric. “Thank you—“ Rin started. But the woman was gone, departing with a wave of her rose-covered fan.

‘Roses…’

Rin had seen roses her entire life, hidden in clothing or accessories as a sign to other Roses that one of them was nearby. It could easily be a coincidence, roses were a common symbol. But the way that woman’s gaze pierced through her soul… pinned Rin down and observed her like she was an interesting insect….

Rin had just been tested.

To see if she could successfully play the part of a noble, she was sure of it. Had she failed? Had that sharp-eyed woman seen through her act or was she merely a frivolous party goer? But if Rin had seccceded… What did that mean as well?

‘How strange…’

“Rin!” A voice whispered from a few feet away.

God, was there another suspicious would-be noble behind her? But when Rin turned there was no random, scary woman it was—

‘Miku?!’

“What are you doing out here?!” Rin questioned, hurrying over to her. Miku remained silent, looking around at the nobles surrounding them.

‘Right. Nothing's wrong, just a normal conversation between sisters.’

“I need your help” Miku asked just barely above a whisper. Rin hadn’t noticed at first but now that she was looking straight at Miku— from the light of the candles around them Rin could see remnants of tears across her face.

“Ok then let’s get somewhere quieter” she whispered, snapping back to reality. The ballroom was still crowded so there was no chance of her and Miku talking entirely alone, but if they moved to the more empty section of the room and lowered their voices….

“I don’t think I can do it, Rin,” Miku said blankly.

“What?” She responded, taken aback.

“I don’t think I can kill Kaito,” she blurted. Rin noticed that Miku was rubbing her hands together, her pose was rigid and her eyes were wide.

She looked as afraid as when Rin had met her all those years ago.

“I’ve tried to think about— the famines, the deaths, but no matter what I do I can’t stop caring!” Her breaths came out panicked and stressed and the faded tears on her face were replaced with new ones. Miku's emotions were practically spilling out of her, which only worried Rin more.

‘She won’t survive like this… I need to do something!’

“Just— forget. Forget who you are, forget about your past, forget everything about yourself!” she fiercely whispered, taking Miku’s hands in her own, “Play the part of a noble and ignore what you're really doing here.”

“What do I do when it’s midnight?” Miku mumbled, “When I can’t just pretend anymore…?”

“Just thrust your knife forward… and kill him. We can figure out the rest later.”

“You promise?”

“I promise,” The two sat there for a moment, the weight of those words laying heavy on their chests.

“I’ve never killed any one. I don’t know why the Fairy Godmother chose me for this mission.” Miku let out a small, sad laugh looking to the side.

“Because she knows you can do it, somehow” Rin joked in a desperate attempt to make Miku slightly happy. Miku still didn’t seem convinced, but Rin could sense that she was grounding herself. That’s all that mattered.

“Thanks, Rin,” Miku breathed.

“That’s what I’m here for!” Rin laughed, “As your sister.” Rin reached over to wipe Miku's tears with her thumb, stopping the droplets from staining her face again. Miku leaned into the touch, with the smallest smile appearing on her lips.

“Hey, Rin… do you still have those sedatives?” Miku asked hesitantly.

“Of course, Luka asked for them! Which ones do you need?” Rin responded, already discreetly reaching for the secret pouches embedded in the fabric.

“The ones that take a couple hours to kick in,” Miku mumbled.

Rin’s gaze immediately snapped away from her pockets and onto Miku. Rin could see it clearly on her face, what Miku wished to do. She wanted to grant the Prince a mercy, so that he would die already half-asleep. It would hurt less for him.

Rin wasn’t naive, Miku knew that, she was just hoping Rin would accept her request.

‘She better not be doing this for me…’

It was Rin's choice to keep her own hands clean, she never wanted to force her aversion on anyone else. The Prince would have to die by Miku’s hands either way, the sedatives would only… lessen the pain. Even if he didn’t deserve it— No one needed to know but them. Luka wouldn’t be happy about it, but Rin accepted it was inevitable. Miku had the power to change, to transform, if she wanted to.

That's why Rin always admired her.

“I’ve got plenty of those, don’t worry” Rin returned, placing three small, white tablets in Miku's hand. She heard Miku let out a sigh of relief, holding the tablets tight in her grasp.

“Thank you.”

The first chime of ten o’ clock rang.

The sound of the clock chiming made Miku jump. Two hours until their escape.

“I have to go Rin, I promised I’d be back by now,” Miku apologized, already turning to flee.

“Good luck!” Rin whispered back, but Miku had already vanished in a flurry of white, the sound of the clock echoing in her ears. Everything would be alright. Miku would be safe, Luka would be proud, and the Order would succeed.

That’s all that mattered.

The balcony had a pretty view. You could easily overlook the entire room from this point. The palace was very beautiful, but he knew that already.

Maybe he was just distracting himself….

If he had to admit, he felt a bit conflicted. The “young maiden” his mother had talked about was very different from what he had expected. Her name was Miku and she was from Aedair, some distant territory within the empire. She held the same polite demeanor that all nobles had but held some bitter, hidden defiance she refused to push down. Everyone was too scared to talk to him about the famines, she was the only one that dared.

He’d never met anyone like that.

Kaito looked down upon the ball room again. She was down there, somewhere, probably avoiding him. He understood why.

“My mother died in one of the famines"

Those words still stung in his chest. Kaito had no idea how to respond to them, Miku had seemed so vulnerable at that moment. He let out a sigh. He had pushed Miku into a stressful conversation, one neither of them were neatly prepared for. Kaito would want to take a step away from himself as well.

So far he hadn’t exactly made her comfortable….

Kaito glanced at the clock, coincidentally the same moment the clock would strike ten. Out of the corner of his eye Kaito could see Miku rushing up the stairs, her dress trailing behind her like snow. It looked like she was holding something within her hands but Kaito could not make out what it was from his spot.

“Apologies for the detour!” Miku said, adjusting her tiara since it had gone askew when she was running, “I couldn’t bear the thought of ignoring Rin this whole time, she would have my head!” Now that she was closer Kaito realized that the object she was holding was a crystal glass, inside some sort of drink.

Miku and her stepsister seemed close. From the short moments he had seen of them together they always looked so comfortable and happy. Sometimes Kaito wished he had siblings of his own, someone his age he could— well just grow up with. Kaito's parents had only one heir, him, and that was for the best.

No need to burden anyone else with this life.

“There’s no need to, I should be the one apologizing after all.” She tilted her head in confusion but her eyes told the truth. She was trying to pretend nothing had happened.

“There’s no need to apologize,” she said, setting the glass down on the balcony railing, “Sometimes I simply just get carried away.” Maybe her talk with Rin had lifted her spirits, though that didn’t make everything alright.

“You still deserve an apology.”

Silence stretched on.

“I appreciate it, but there’s no point in dwelling on it,” she responded, “We have two hours left until this ends anyway, what good would it do for me to stay upset?”

‘Right, two hours….’

“If it helps, I forgive you Kaito,” she said, holding up the glass, “This is for you.”

“And still nothing for yourself?” Kaito said, taking it from her gloved hand.

“I don’t mind,” Miku said with a laugh.

“Thank you,” he said, lifting the crystal glass to his lips. It tasted slightly bitter, but he’d tasted worse. It was the thought that counted. Kaito discarded the glass onto the balcony railing.

“We shouldn’t be spending all our time up here,” she muttered, her voice slightly shifting into her usual, more observant tone. “The event is on the main floor anyway, you should be enjoying it.”

“Maybe we could dance again?” Kaito requested. She seemed so carefree the last time they danced… maybe that would cheer her up. Miku paused, her expression slightly confused, then let out a small laugh.

“I’d love to.”

She took his hands in hers, and he didn’t pull away.

“Then lead the way,” he said with a laugh.