Chapter Text
“Zenitsu, I swear on every form of Thunder Breathing there is, I’m going to leave you out here baking in the sun if you do not stop KICKING ME.”
It had been a few hours since Kaigaku’s encounter with who he assumed was the Water Hashira. He managed to get himself and Zenitsu out of the forest by climbing back up the cliff he fell from, and was walking along a dirt path before the yellow haired brat woke up and started writhing in the haori.
Not even five minutes after he woke up, Zenitsu started driving his ankles into Kaigaku’s shoulder, the same one that was damaged after the fall, and despite being wrapped in a haori, most of his hits landed dangerously hard.
It was after a particularly hard kick in the shoulder that was definitely strong enough to leave a bruise that Kaigaku threw the bundle onto the ground with enough force to draw out a startled yelp from the kid inside but not enough to physically injure the boy. Kaigaku, exhausted from everything that happened to him in the span of a day, just sat on the ground next to the white fabric, which was stained and dirty.
“The water bastard better not make me replace his haori too…” Kaigaku grumbled. All his adrenaline ran out, and all that all that he had going for him was an exhausted, bruised, and sweaty body. The sun was especially hot after the absolute shit show of a storm that crashed down on them a few hours earlier, baking Kaigaku alive in his already sweaty and uncomfortable slayer uniform.
He also did not appreciate the weird looks he got from the random people strolling about on the deserted path. Why were they even on this path anyway? But it was fine, he could deal with all of that.
Everything about that day was leading Kaigaku to assume that the Heavens themselves were trying to kill him, or at the very least wear him down until he was vulnerable to even the weakest demon attack. The last thing he needed right now was to watch over a whiny brat with no survival instincts that randomly decided to start physically abusing him.
Right on cue, Kaigaku heard shuffling right next to him. Looking at the discarded bundle on the ground next to him, he noticed a small scarred hand trying to reach out to grab his ruined haori. Before Kaigaku could properly react, Zenitsu’s fingertips made it into a sliver of sunlight, instantly starting the burning process. Instant panic shot through Kaigaku as he hurried to shove the hand back inside the mess of a haori to prevent Zenitsu from burning alive.
“You fucking dumbass, do you have no common sense?! It’s like you want to die, holy shit.” Kaigaku heard a small noise of discomfort and pain, possibly from the burnt hand, from inside the haori, but he couldn’t care less about comfort right now. “Would you rather be in an uncomfortable haori or be burning alive in the fucking sun?” Silence. Kaigaku leaned back, closing his eyes as he tried to finally get some well-earned rest. “Yeah that’s what I thought. Now shut the fuck up and stop whining so much, I need to think.”
No he didn’t, he just enjoyed the silence.
The silence that lasted approximately 5 minutes.
‘What if you didn’t go on that mission?’
Kaigaku’s brows furrowed. It was a dumb ‘What-If.’ An unrealistic one too, at that. Refusing missions was a violation of the Demon Slayer Corps.
‘Well,’ Kaigaku turned his attention back to the white lump of fabric on the ground. ‘I would know a lot about violations, wouldn’t I?’
‘What if you got there earlier? What would’ve happened if you didn’t waste so much time hunting that stupid demon?’
Kaigaku put his head in his hands, trying to force the loud ass thoughts in his head out. He had to stop thinking about this. What happened is set in stone, he can’t change the past.
‘Maybe he wouldn’t be dead if you just-’
“Okay!” Kaigaku stood, yanking the cloth off the ground. The sudden movement startled Zenitsu, who somehow managed to fall asleep despite being hot as hell under all the fabric. “We’re moving.” Hauling the bundle onto his back, he continued down the path, still exhausted but frustrated at his restless brain.
The path went on for kilometers and kilometers, never seeming to end. There were nothing but trees around, and all the previous random strangers on the path had all made their way off the long road, leaving Kaigaku and the brat alone. And said brat was getting frustrated.
And frustration led to more kicking.
As much as Kaigaku knew that the bundle plan was bothering them both, and as much as he wanted to just drop the kid on the ground and wait for him to follow, he knew that would only make things worse. The blazing sun had settled right above the duo, melting the both of them under the fabric. Not to mention the fact that Zenitsu would actually burn alive the second the sun hit him. Though, leaving Zenitsu to burn alive sounded pretty tempting right now.
Gods, why did life have to get so complicated for him all of a sudden?
Kaigaku stopped. He’s been walking for a while, carrying an added amount of weight on his back, exhausted as all hell. He couldn’t remember the last time he got proper rest.
‘The last time you got proper rest was when your master was still al-’
Kaigaku kept walking. He forced his body to keep moving down the path. He wasn’t even sure if any of this was worth it. He had no idea what lay at the end of the road. For all he knew, it could be days before he saw or heard another human being.
“I’m going to go fucking insane. How the hell am I supposed to stay sane in these conditions?!” Kaigaku yelled, purely out of frustration, as there was no one he could yell it at. Well, no one that would respond to his outbursts. “I haven’t had a good night’s rest since before the Final Selection, I’m hungry as hell, It’s hot as fuck outside, and there’s no human being for what could be the next few days!” Kaigaku kicked a rock out of frustration, and received a kick to the shoulder in response.
“You don’t count, you brat.” He murmured, having slightly calmed down. “You’re not even human anymore.”
Kaigaku stared ahead, and nothing stared back. All that he could see were kilometers of empty road, and too many trees. A shadow flew above them, too fast for Kaigaku to make out the shape of what made the shadow, and far too small for Kaigaku to identify the creature.
But Kaigaku knew exactly what it was.
“You know,” Kaigaku started, glancing at the sky. “It sure would be great if my damn crow would help me.”
“...”
“...Like how my crow is supposed to help me.”
“...”
Kaigaku raised his voice. “It sure would be great-!”
“Alright, alright! Calm your ass down!” An annoying voice that couldn’t belong to anything human responded. “I’ll fly ahead and see what there is for you! Jeez, couldn’t even be bothered to say please or thank you…” The crow, Nari, muttered that last part before it flew further down the road. Kaigaku watched him fly away until all he could see was a black dot slowly getting smaller and smaller in the distance.
Seeing no point in continuing on while waiting for Nari to return, Kaigaku used the last of his strength to drag himself and Zenitsu to the nearest tree for shade. It was large enough for its shadow to remain unmoving as the day passed, reducing the chances of leaving Zenitsu baking in the sun.
Dropping the bundle onto the ground, Kaigaku let himself collapse onto the trunk of the tree, lazily glancing at the brat struggling to get out from inside the haori. With a defeated sigh, he undid the knot that kept the whole makeshift bundle from unraveling, setting the kid free.
Tossing the white fabric aside, Kaigaku could finally see the brat that’s been harassing him for the past few hours. His hair was damp and he could see a small coating of sweat on his skin from being shoved into a stuffy bundle. His strangely yellow and orange hair was tousled and messy, similar to his black haori that was definitely a size too big on him and yellow kimono.
Zenitsu stared at him with wide eyes, now bearing slit pupils and fangs hidden under the mask he was wearing. Kaigaku glared at him back, silently daring him to pull any of those same stunts he pulled back at the cliffside. The kid shrunk under his gaze, definitely not enjoying whatever silent conversation they were having.
After another beat of silence, Kaigaku glanced at the messy hair, and with whatever strength he had left, managed to ask, “Why the fuck is your hair yellow?”
His head slumped as the world turned dark for the second time that day.
When he woke up, having thankfully not suffered any more dreams (nightmares?), Kaigaku was greeted by the lovely sight of his crow attempting to peck out Zenitsu’s eyeballs.
“What the fuck is happening.” Nari, turning his head to face his owner, quickly jumped from Zenitsu’s head to Kaigaku’s arm.
“Well, for your information, I was saving you!” Nari proudly exclaimed.
Zenitsu and Kaigaku both glanced at each other, sharing a knowing look.
“Saving me from what, exactly?” Kaigaku was certain it had to do with his new demon companion (if you could even call him that), but he was curious as to what Zenitsu could have possibly done to fill this poor bird with so much rage.
“From that demon, of course!” Nari pointed a wing at the kid, who seemed just as confused but less amused as Kaigaku. “He was reaching for your arm, about to devour you in your helpless and vulnerable form! Thank Gods I came here just in time to save you from that thing, otherwise you would have been dead! And we do not want that!”
Kaigaku’s eye twitched at being called “helpless” and "vulnerable." Those were not the usual adjectives he would typically use to describe himself, but he was too tired to care enough to pick a fight. He glanced at Nari, who was still posing dramatically, and then at Zenitsu, who looked tired of the bird, and then back at Nari, who decided to stare at him with his soulless eyes that were as big as his pinky nail.
“You seriously think that brat could kill me? I’m offended that you think so lowly of me.” Kaigaku scoffed, sitting up off the trunk. Before Nari could respond with some dramatic cries of self pity, Kaigaku turned to look at the sun, which seemed to be just about ready to set for the night. “How long was I asleep for?”
“Seven hours.” Nari responded, following Kaigaku’s gaze. Kaigaku froze for a minute, before regaining his composure and turned to look at the crow.
“...It took you seven hours to fly back to me again?”
“WHAT?!” Nari screeched, and Kaigaku thanked the Gods that he didn’t have Zenitsu’s inhuman hearing abilities. “How DARE you?! I am the fastest crow you will ever meet! I actually got back to you as soon as you conked out for the day! I was simply fending off this savage beast for hours!” Nari fell dramatically onto Kaigaku’s lap, feigning having fainted. “Oh, poor me! I spent so many hours protecting you from it, and you don’t even seem to appreciate my hard work! It wasn’t easy, you know!”
Kaigaku turned his attention to Zenitsu, who was covering his ears like his life and sanity depended on it, and with how loud Nari was being, that might have been the actual case. “He’s been fighting you for seven hours?” The kid’s tired eyes and several scratch and bite marks that could only have been caused by a beak answered the question for him. Kaigaku sighed, dragging his hands down his face. “Don’t tell me I have to babysit two annoying brats.”
Nari screeched once more at Kaigaku while Zenitsu threw the discarded haori at him, and Kaigaku decided that maybe it wasn’t the best idea to antagonize the most insufferable not-so-human-anymore person and crow he’s ever known. Those two didn't act so differently, and Kaigaku wasn't sure which one was worse: two Zenitsus or two Naris.
“As much as I’ve been…’loving’ this meeting, we’d better get going soon. The sun’s setting fast and demons are going to start hunting all of our asses if we stand here doing nothing.” Kaigaku stood, dropping the crow that’s been on his lap. “Nari, what did you find up ahead?”
“Well,” Nari quickly recovered, finding a place on Kaigaku’s shoulder as he spoke. “I haven’t found anything down the road- Well I did but it’s much too far to travel to, especially in the dead of night! BUT! I did find a small shelter oveeeer-” Nari turned rapidly, trying to remember what direction the shelter was in, and messing up Kaigaku's hair in the process. “THERE! Over there!”
Kaigaku followed where the small wing was pointing. There seemed to be a small trail leading into the woods just off the trail. There were broken twigs and branches on the ground from where the entrance was carved out, and the forest itself was way too dark to be able to see anything in it.
Was this really safer than walking down the path?
Probably not, but Kaigaku couldn’t care less. He just wanted to get to the shelter. Preferably before any major inconveniences catch up to them, such as demons jumping them while they travel down the ridiculously long road. Seriously, who put that there anyway? Hauling Zenitsu, who’s been uncharacteristically quiet for his standards, off the ground, Kaigaku left Nari on his shoulder as he started to the forest, not waiting for Zenitsu to catch up to him.
“Oh right.” Kaigaku suddenly stopped right outside the trail entrance, turning to face the brat that was running behind me. Before Zenitsu could stop to catch his breath, Kaigaku pulled out his sword, still stained with the blood of whatever battle was lost in Jigoro’s estate. “Don’t think that just because I saved your ass back at the cliff, it means that I trust you now. I’m still pissed as hell about that shit you pulled, and I’m especially pissed at you kicking me for hours on end. If I see you even attempt to attack me again, I’ll slice your goddamn head off and beg for forgiveness from all the Hashiras who definitely already know of this violation.” He pointed the sword directly at Zenitsu’s neck. “Understood?”
Only receiving a weak nod in response, Kaigaku lowered the sword and put it back into its holster while Nari silently mocked the trembling boy. With that out of the way, Kaigaku and the two brats he was babysitting were off for the woods.